Chapter Text
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"Loyalty means nothing unless it has at its heart the absolute principle of self-sacrifice." ~Woodrow Wilson~
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In all honesty Emily thought going after Doyle alone was the end for her. She never expected to come of out the ordeal alive. All she had cared about was that her team/family along with Declan and Louise were safe. As long as they all stayed that way, she had fulfilled what she set out to, she had made peace with with her fate.
She didn't have any hope for herself coming out of the situation unscathed. Hell she didn't have any hope at all, until the few moments she physically had the upper hand on Doyle before the power went out in the compound. That was enough to distract her, drop her weapon that caused her near fatal flaw. Next thing she knew Doyle had retrieved the table leg and stabbed her with it.
Lying on the cold, hard concrete floor, Emily felt like an idiot. Sure she kept the team safe like she needed to, but now Doyle knew the truth about Declan, he was getting away, and she had failed the people she loved most.
This wasn't part of her contingency plans, the dying part was, but her death, her sacrifice was supposed to be entangled with meaning full of altruism, dignity, and purpose. She doubted she was going to survive this ordeal.
She could hear multiple voices and see the flashlights Garcia's voicemail had promised, and in that moment she knew she was not alone in the dark anymore, Garcia had been right. Emily knew she was running out of time, but she tried to keep her end of Garcia's bargain and stay alive. She could vaguely feel her warm blood spreading through her hands, pooling beneath her body.
She thought she hallucinated hearing Morgan, but then she saw him kneeling beside her trying to stop the bleeding. She could feel herself getting colder and hazier by the second. She knew he was trying to tell her to hold on, but she wasn't sure she could anymore.
She vaguely recalled him saying he was proud of her, that he knew she did it all for Declan. Emily wasn't sure he knew everything, he should hate her, be disgusted and disappointed with her. Did he know everything she had to undercover, why she really ran to protect them too, how her ruthless, reckless approach going alone after Ian Doyle was the only way. Emily felt light headed, and so cold, disjointed from her thoughts, feeling, and pain. All the fight, adrenaline and determination had left her.
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"Not all of us are called to die a martyr’s death, but all of us are called to have the same spirit of self-sacrifice and love to the very end as these martyrs had." ~Richard Wurmbrand~
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