Chapter Text
It’s rare to witness a silent night on the open sea. Typically, the waves crash violently against the body of the ship, or lightning flashes above them; so bright that it makes the dark sky appear as if it were midday. On busy nights like these, the ship is alive with crewmembers running about, tending to the boat and making sure they all make it out of the storm safely.
This night, however, was different. The waves passed by with a certain gentleness gifted by the Archons, and the breeze flowed delicately through the air. The water reflected the dark yet clear sky above them, and the moon cast its familiar pale light onto the sleeping ship. The members of the Crux celebrated nights like these by getting the rest they so dearly needed.
At least..most of the members.
Kazuha lay awake in his cot, as he often did. His mind occupied thoughts too loud for him to sleep. While his crewmates generally dread nights of turmoil, Kazuha hoped for them. The dangerous waters gave him work, allowed him to be helpful, while also being able to avoid the nagging thoughts that demand to be heard otherwise. He loved being able to prove his worth to the crew. He’d do anything to help out. It was his way of saying “thank you,” especially to Beidou, for taking him in and giving him a home.
Now, laying restless and wide awake, Kazuha found himself thinking again.
The topic living in his thoughts? Inazuma.
Specifically, his escape.
The decision to leave Inazuma hadn’t been an easy one.
This statement seems shocking to some. (It’s not as if it was a “decision” anyway, he was practically forced out). The origin of his traumas, his nightmares, Tomo’s death, all stemmed from the cluster of islands that he used to call home. Any other person would escape without hesitation and never look back.
And that’s how it had been, at least for a while. Kazuha wanted nothing more than to leave the memories behind, to push away any connection he had to Inazuma and move on with his life in the company of the Crux. And for the most part, he’d been successful. Sure, he was still looking for a way to reignite Tomo’s vision..but that was purely for scientific purposes, to see if it could be done. If he was able to make it light up again, to feel the spark of electro energy in his hands, it would be a massive breakthrough in the way Tyvat viewed the elemental gifts.
He’d much rather do that than let his friend’s vision-Tomo’s ambition- be stolen and held captive by a cruel and unjust god.
Other than that, Kazuha willed all thoughts of Inazuma out of his mind.
Yet, when the traveler appeared and expressed his desire to journey to the nation of eternity, Kazuha found himself thinking of the life he left behind.
There was something about the traveler, Aether, as he called himself, that Kazuha could not decipher. He carried a presence like none other, and the way he held himself during battle was unlike anything the samurai had ever seen. Not only that, but Aether could control the elements-without a vision.
Kazuha didn’t understand him, at least not at first. His unwavering desire to reach Inazuma had shocked him. The wanderer had been used to hearing quite the opposite before he escaped. Others would have given everything to be able to leave the horrid islands safely. Yet, Aether was determined to enter.
One day, he and Aether were leaning against the side of the ship and gazing into the lively water below. Even while docked at the harbor, there were still dozens of colorful sea life that danced below the surface. The faint yet familiar scent of salt hung in the air, and a cool breeze tugged at their clothes. For a while, they talked about everything and nothing, making idle chatter as the sun slowly set behind the Liyue mountains. After a while, their talking died down, and the two of them stood silently as they observed the busy harbor.
“Why?” Kazuha suddenly said, letting his curiosity get the best of him. He felt Aether’s confused gaze fall upon the shorter male before continuing, “All that resides in Inazuma is loss and hardship. What could make your desire to go so strong?”
Kazuha was met with a warm smile, but he didn’t miss the hint of heartache behind the blond’s eyes.
“I’m looking for my sister,” He replied simply, “We were separated, and I will travel all of Tyvat for her. No matter how dangerous.”
Ah. That, more than anyone, Kazuha understood. Losing someone close to you is something he would wish upon no one, not even his greatest of enemies. At least Aether had a chance at reuniting with his lost kin. Kazuha didn’t have that kind of fortune.
“Besides,” Aether’s golden hair seemed to glow in the setting sun, “I have a knack for finding the good in hardship.”
There was a moment of silence before Kazuha spoke again.
“I think you’ll like the scenery in Inazuma. If anything, that’s its best quality. The trees dance with the breeze and complement the sky’s vibrant color,” He closed his eyes as he recalled his favorite places, “It’s wonderful in the daytime, but nightfall is where you find the hidden beauty. The sky is painted a deep blue, and the dusk fog falls silently across the land. The flowers shine, lighting up the dark night with a gentle glow that illuminates the dew-ridden grass. The storms on the horizon rumble softly, yet the island itself is rather calm,” Kazuha softly laughed, “Well, most of the time.” He opened his crimson eyes to meet with Aether's, placing his bandaged hand atop the other’s gloved one. “I hope you find your sister.” He spoke, voice soft, before turning and walking away. Before Kazuha disappeared below deck, he paused and turned slightly, “Just..please be careful. Do not question the power of the Raiden Shogun.”
_______________
After the Crux dropped the traveler off to meet with Thoma, Kazuha found himself feeling lonely in his absence. He had friends among the crew, but they didn’t share the same light that Aether had. Kazuha silently cursed himself for putting his trust in someone so quickly, but Aether felt..different.
Without Aether around to act as a distraction, Kazuha’s thoughts grew loud once more. The question that never seemed to leave his mind was always the same: Had he been selfish? Leaving them all behind for his own safety?
Beidou would say no. She often reminded him that he was a wanted man, and that if he didn’t leave, he would've been caught and killed eventually.
“You won’t be any help to the resistance if you’re dead, kid.” She had said.
She had a point, but that didn’t stop Kazuha from lying awake. He hadn’t even had the chance to say goodbye to his friends. Gorou himself would kill him for that. If he ever saw him again. If he was still alive.
This was useless. He obviously wasn’t going to sleep anytime soon. He slowly got out of bed and walked with silent steps toward Beidou’s quarters. He knew she was still awake. They’d spent countless nights talking in her quarters when either (or both) of them couldn’t sleep. Sometimes they spoke about the things that kept them up, other times it was as simple as discussing the next day’s route. Sometimes, they don’t even talk. They simply enjoyed being in each other's company.
He knocked on the heavy wooden door, and upon hearing the usual, “come in,” he slowly opened it, which protested with a quiet creak.
Beidou was sitting in a cushioned seat. Her head was tilted downward slightly, letting her long hair flow over her shoulders and partially into her face. She appeared to be reading, with the gentle flicker of a lantern glowing beside her. Just enough light to read in the dark.
“Hey, Kazuha. Another restless night?” She asked without looking up. She grew accustomed to this routine and knew exactly who had appeared at her door.
“Afraid so. I’ve had a lot on my mind recently,” He responded in a quiet voice, “What are you reading?”
She looked up from her book and showed him the cover, a small smile spread across her face.
“Ah. You’re actually reading it?” Kazuha asked as he realized what she was holding. It was a book he’d gotten from Liyue, a compilation of some of his favorite poems and stories.
“It was a gift from you, of course I’m reading it. Besides, I wanted to read poems written by someone other than you for once.” She joked, flipping the book closed, “You said something was on your mind?”
Kazuha slightly tensed at her question. “Yeah..” He said, eyeing the floor.
“You wanna talk about it?”
He hesitated a moment. It might do him well to talk, but he wasn’t sure he had the energy to explain his complicated feelings tonight. How could he tell her that his guilt was eating him alive? That the uncertainty of his friend's well-being was fueling his nightmares? ..That he was considering going back for them?
“I’ll go first, if you want,” Beidou said before Kazuha could respond, sensing his hesitance, “And you can talk to me if you’re feeling up to it.”
Kazuha nodded in silent agreement and sat down in a chair across from Beidou upon her gesture.
Beidou closed her eyes and sighed for a moment before continuing. “I received word from someone in Inazuma today.” She finally spoke.
Kazuha’s eyes widened and his head snapped up. Someone from Inazuma reached out? Was it an update on the Vision Hunt Decree? Did he know them? Did the Raiden Shogun appear in public?
..Was anyone hurt-?
“It’s not bad news, I promise.” Beidou quickly said, picking up on his panic. She was always good at reading his emotions, no matter how composed Kazuha attempted to be. She cursed herself for being so vague with her start.
“It’s from Kokomi.” She finished.
The Resistance.
“Her excellency?” Kazuha found himself saying, voice hardly audible.
“Though it’s not bad news,” She repeated, “It’s still the reason I’m not soundly asleep right now.
“..Because it’s about you.”