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Obi-Wan’s could feel the surgical brightness behind his eyes that his brain automatically associated with the Halls of Healing.
That in itself was confusing.
The last thing he could remember he wasn't even on Coruscant. He’d been on some sort of mission he thought. They’d been running an evacuation. Qui-Gon had been supervising the attempts to get the civilians onto the ships while Obi-Wan… while Obi-Wan had…
Terrorists. It had been something to do with terrorists. They had not wanted the people to leave for some reason and then they had…
The Bombs! The Landslide!
Obi-Wans eyes flew open.
He was lying in one of the beds in the Halls. There was a consistent beeping emanating from the monitors on the wall to his right. And on his left, Qui-Gon sat. He was slumped over to the side fast asleep. He did not look comfortable, he was sitting in a narrow chair, head propped against the wall. His legs were folded in the small gap between the chair and the bed and his hands were clasped around Obi-Wans forearm.
This didn’t make any sense.
The last thing he remembered he’d been on Bacrana. That landslide had separated him from his Master and then.
Ah…
He’d been injured, he could remember that now. And there was something that had stopped the med team from getting to him.
He’d had to…
Obi-Wan moved, and the skin down his chest pulled. He gasped in pain. Qui-Gon jerked back to attention, head swivelling around until he focused on Obi-Wan. His grip on his arm tightened.
“Padawan!”
Qui-Gon jerked forward, hands gripping Obi-Wan’s shoulders.
“You’re Awake, you’re finally awake!”
“Master?” His voice was weak, his throat bone dry. It was as if his voice hadn’t been used in days. He rubbed a hand against his neck trying to soothe the irritation but was met with a scratchy sensation of his skin. There was stubble, stubble far longer than Obi-Wan ever let it grow. This didn’t make any sense. They hadn’t even been in the core. How long had it been? How much time had he lost?
Obi-Wan looked closer at his Master. Qui-Gon looked haggard, as out of sorts as he had ever seen him. Qui-Gon had never been one of the most regal Jedi but he had always seemed like he knew what he was doing. Even when covered in mud bartering his Padawans best cloak on a whim of the force he always conveyed the idea that he was perfectly in control of any situation.
He did not seem that way now.
“You cannot do that to me again Padawan.”
“Do what?”
Qui-Gon fixed him with an unimpressed look. Obi-Wan probably deserved that, he had answered his Master sarcastically probably too many times over recent years, but this time it wasn’t an attempt to test his Masters' limits. He truly did not understand what was going on.
“The evacuation. What happened with it, did they all get on?”
Qui-Gon looked at him concerned.
“Padawan, what is the last thing you remember?”
Obi-Wan frowned. “There was a landslide, we were on different sides?”
His Master sighed. “You were injured Padawan, I tried to send a Medical Team to you but it had to come from the capital.” He frowned. “You said you would be fine.”
“Well I’m here aren’t I. I must have been right” Obi-Wan tried to joke.
The attempt at Levity did not seem to go down well with Qui-Gon. He scowled at him. “You were not fine Padawan!” Qui-Gon’s tone was hard, but Obi-Wan had known him long enough to understand that this wasn’t Qui-Gon being angry. This was Qui-Gon being scared.
“You should have told me the severity of your injuries Padawan, I can’t strategise if I do not know the true state of the situation. I would have found another option so you didn’t… so you wouldn’t have to…”
Qui-Gon trailed off, his face pale. He wasn’t looking at Obi-Wans face anymore but down at his chest. The place where the skin was pulling. The area was aching now, the previous sense of discomfort giving way to actual pain.
“Master what-“
“You should not have been put into that position Padawan, most Knights are never put in that position. You should have told me. I could have gotten to you, so you didn’t have to…”
Pain. Burning pain. His eyes closed as he bit down on his robe to stifle his attempts to scream. To stop himself from flinching away. To make sure he sealed-
Obi-Wan remembered, and everything suddenly made so much more sense. His injury wouldn’t stop bleeding so he’d had to stop it himself…
“Master, I did what I had to do. The citizens were our mission, their medical care was more important.”
Qui-Gon looked furious. “The citizens only had minor injuries Padawan. Scratches and the odd broken bone. As it turned out it was you who needed the medical care the most, but we were unable to triage because you didn't tell me how bad you were actually injured! It’s my job to assess the priorities of our mission Padawan, not yours.”
Obi-Wan flinched backwards and Qui-Gon let go of his shoulders before sitting back. Obi-Wan was shocked when he saw his Master drop his head into his hands.
“You don’t know what it was like Padawan. You stopped answering your comm, and when I found you-“ He cut himself off, taking a heavy breath. If Obi-Wan didn’t know better he’d have thought Qui-Gon was suppressing a sob. He shook his head before continuing in a steadier tone.
“When I found you, you were lying perfectly still in a pool of your blood. I thought you were dead Padawan. I thought I’d failed you. And then I saw what you did…”
Obi-Wan winced.
“I’m sorry Master, I didn’t mean to put you through anything.”
Qui-Gon gave a choking laugh before he leaned forward dropping a hand onto Obi-Wan’s knee. “You should never have been it into that position Padawan. Doing what you did is not healthy. But it probably did save your life. I am proud of you for being able to think clearly enough to make it. But the fact that you are still seemingly more bothered with the fact that you made me worry than the fact that you sealed your wound with your lightsaber, alone, with no pain relief seems to prove that you still have far too low of an opinion when it comes to your self-worth. That is probably my fault.”
“No Master” Obi-Wan said indignantly. “You’ve never.”
“Don’t argue with me Padawan. Your loss would be a loss to the Oorder and the fact that you have just spent the last two weeks in a coma and still appear under the impression that it is my feelings that need to be handled just shows that I have not spent enough time letting you know that.”
Obi-Wan’s head was beginning to swim. “Two weeks? I’ve been here two weeks?”
“Yes, Padawan. The healers weren’t sure exactly what you did, they seemed to think you put yourself into some sort of deep mediation to cope with the pain. But they didn’t know how you did it. And they didn’t know how long it would take for you to wake up. Or if you’d wake up at all…” Qui-Gon gave him a weak smile. “You worried us Padawan. You worried us a lot.”
Obi-Wan shook his head in an attempt to clear the fog that was clouding his thoughts. “Mediation? But I have never been good a mediation, how would I be able to put myself into that sort of trance when I can’t even do combat mediation?.”
Qui-Gon shook his head. “This is exactly my point Padawan, you think too poorly of yourself. I take the blame for that, I was clearly not good enough in the early years of our partnership. I will be better going forward, that I swear.”
Obi-Wan couldn’t understand what was going on. He’d never felt that Qui-Gon had done that to him, considering he’d been foisted on his Master when he hadn’t wanted another Padawan he thought Qui-Gon had been particularly accommodating. He frowned. e couldn’t concentrate, his vision was beginning to blur as he tried to work through what his Master had said. Nothing made sense. He’d stopped the bleeding hadn’t he, and by doing so he had allowed his Master to complete the mission. His head began to pound. He just couldn’t understand what he had done wrong.
“Master, my head hurts. I don’t…”
Qui-Gon shook his head. “Don’t worry Padawan. Sleep. I’ll be here to answer any questions when you wake up.”
Obi-Wan couldn’t quite suppress his yawn. The room seemed to be growing darker. “You don’t have to wait, Master. I’ll be fine on my own.”
Qui-Gon sighed, looking more exasperated. “Sleep Padawan. We’ll talk more in the morning.
Obi-Wan couldn’t help but feel that he was missing something, but he couldn’t work out what it was. His Master clearly had been trying to tell him something but…
Before Obi-Wan could follow that thought any further he fell back into a deep sleep.