Work Text:
Merlin sat at his desk, tongue sticking out of his lips as he focused. He made sure the scissor cut went really straight and didn’t show any pen lines on the heart. He wanted the card to be special.
After sprinkling some more glitter on the page (you could never have too much glitter) Merlin decided the card was all finished. He shook it, because he didn’t think Freya would like it if glitter got all over her desk. She’d get a lot of cards, anyway, and Merlin wanted to make sure she liked his.
He liked Freya since the first day of preschool, when Arthur had pushed him over and taken his lunch and Freya had given him half her sandwich. Merlin thought Freya was really kind, and he always stuck up for her when people were mean- not that she needed it. She was braver enough herself. But Merlin figured he wouldn’t be a good friend if he didn’t try and stick up for everyone.
On his way to Freya’s card box, Merlin snuck by his desk so he could put a sweet in the envelope for her. Merlin didn’t really like Valentine’s Day very much, it made his mum cry and people teased him more than usual. And they all teased each other, and most people sat around making fun of people’s cards.
So he decided to sneak in at lunch, when people wouldn’t see him. Merlin didn’t *love* Freya, he didn’t want to kiss her because that would be weird. And then they’d have to get married and he didn’t want to get married yet. And Freya liked cats more than dogs and Merlin would want a lot of dogs when he was grown up.
Merlin crept in to class, but before he had time to sneak his card into Freya’s desk, he stopped, scared. There was someone hunched over his own desk, messing around with his card box. Merlin usually only got two or three friendship cards, but he still didn’t want anyone to take them.
“Hey!” Merlin shouteed, before he could stop himself. The other person flinched, shooting up rigid and stepping away from the box. “Arthur?”
Arthur turned round to look at him, and his face flushed crimson. Arthur was quite popular, but that could be because people were afraid of him. He was friends with all the big, tough boys, who fought on the playground and bullied the smaller kids. Arthur always teased Merlin, especially.
Merlin didn’t care though. Merlin always got annoyed talking to Arthur, anyway. Arthur was mean and grumpy and his smile made Merlin’s tummy flutter and his tongue stick.
“What are you doing?”
“Nothing!” Arthur shot back, lower lip jutted out. He clenched his hands into fists at his sides, and puffed out his chest so he looked even bigger. Arthur was large, strong, like a bear. Some people called Arthur fat, but he definitely wasn’t. They were probably just jealous. “Go away!” Arthur spat.
“Why are you at my box?” Merlin replied, slowly walking over to his desk. Arthur started backing away, eyes nervously flicking to the door. “Were you stealing my cards?”
“No!” Arthur snapped back, then bit his lip and looked panicked again. “Just shut up!” Arthur snarled.
Arthur was weird. He was always really mean to people (especially Merlin) but then got stupidly upset when people were mean back. One time he and Merlin had a big fight, and even though Merlin was way more scratched and bruised, Arthur was the one who was crying when their parents came.
“Why were you at my box?”
“I wasn’t!”
“I saw you!” Merlin yelped, and he knew he sounded like a puppy and hated that. Lunch would be over soon, and then it would be a few classes and home time, and he didn’t want to give Freya her card then. He wanted her to have a nice surprise when she opened her box.
“Just… Just shut up, stupid!” Arthur stomped his foot, his voice punching the air. Then he thundered past Merlin, shoving him out the way as he stomped out of the class.
Merlin’s mum always said he was too curious, too nosy. But Merlin figured he was allowed to go look in his box, it was his after all. So Merlin bumbled over, and began shifting through the cards. Merlin was one of the best reader and writers in his class, and he could read most of the handwriting on the cards.
Four of the cards were just friend ones, but there was one at the back that looked different. It was really scruffy, the edges folded in and tatty. Merlin did his best to pry it open, but there was a sweet on the inside that had stuck the pages together. Merlin tried to pull the card open carefully, but it eventually tore open in his hands, spilling glitter all over the floor.
Merlin ran his fingers over the shapes and on letters on the page. The person had written a message, but their handwriting was too messy for Merlin to understand. And they’d used a red pen on red paper, smudging it as they wrote.
All Merlin’s other cards had names on them, except this one. One from Will, one from Gwen, one from Freya and one from Sefa. None of them had Arthur’s name on them, though. Merlin looked at the heart shaped card in his hand, and wondered how it could possibly be from Arthur.
Merlin was so surprised by the card he forgot why he came into the class in the first place. Without thinking, he slipped both the cards into his pocket, totally forgetting to give Freya hers.
***
Merlin almost forgot about the cards altogether, after spending the rest of lunch with Will in the sandpit. Actually, Will played in the sandpit and Merlin sat outside it. The sandpit was basically an outdoor cat potty, and Merlin had hated it ever since Arthur buried him in it.
Once they got back to class, everyone started counting out their cards, thanking their friends or laughing at the people who gave them one. Merlin got a weird hot shiver through his tummy when he remembered the one he had gotten from Arthur.
Merlin was a little afraid it was a joke. Arthur was always mean to him. Even though Arthur had blue eyes and blonde hair like a painting of an angel, he didn’t act like one. He was never nice to Merlin, even when Merlin really wanted him to be.
“How many did you get?” Freya grinned, dropping herself beside Merlin. “I got six!”
A jolt of a memory went through Merlin, and he realized he hadn’t given Freya her card.
“Oh, wait a second-” He said. He looked up, eyes catching Arthur across the class.
Arthur’s box was empty, and the blond boy was looking away from everyone else, shaking a teeny bit. Merlin doubted anyone else would notice; no one else was even looking that way.
Merlin’s fingers brushed against the card in his pocket, the one with too much glue and sweets and pen stains. The one that was gunky and messy and probably took far longer to make than all of Merlin’s friend cards together took. The one that Arthur must have spent lots of time making.
Merlin quickly dropped to the floor, replaced the name on his card with a drawing, a new name and started walking over to Arthur. His hands started getting really hot and sweaty, and his tummy hurt, and he thought he might be really sick but he didn’t know for sure.
“Ah…” Merlin’s voice curled up in his throat. He got to Arthur’s desk, and Arthur raised his head to glare at him. Arthur’s arms were crossed and his eyes were cold, but his lips were trembling like Merlin’s mum’s did when she was upset. Merlin was just going to drop the card and run.
But Merlin wasn’t playing close enough attention, and accidentally stumbled and knocked the desk into Arthur’s leg.
“Ow!” Arthur screamed, turning round to glare at Merlin like he was evil. “What was that for?”
“So, so-sorry!” Merlin whispered, quickly trying to drop the card and scarper off. But Arthur snatched it up and snagged Merlin’s arm like bramble bushes before he could. “Arthur!”
“Why did you give me this?” Arthur muttered, finally. “Why would I even want a card from you?”
Merlin felt like someone had poured ice down his back and tummy, and it made him want to run and hide. He could feel his face going red, and he turned furious at himself as he felt tears start in his eyes.
“Fine! I’ll just take it back.” Merlin reached forward, ready to snag the card back out of Arthur’s hands and run away. He’d tell his mum that he needed to move schools and country and maybe even live on a different planet. She’d understand.
“No!” Arthur
“Arthur!” Merlin jumped on to the desk, trying to take the card back out of Arthur’s hand. Arthur was probably just going to make fun of him anyway. “Give it back!”
“No! It’s mine.” Arthur stood up, and dropped the card down his shirt, smiling like he’d won. “There!”
“Fine!” Merlin snapped, and he stomped off, thinking about how big a prat Arthur was.
***
-Ten years later-
“What’s that?” Merlin peeked out from under the duvet, grin already appearing on his face.
“What’s what?” Arthur came out from under the duvet too, trying to see whatever Merlin was pointing at. As soon as he did, he jumped off from the bed and hurried over to the wall, desperate it up and hide his shame.
But Merlin was half a second behind him, and he was fierce enough to have an advantage. As Arthur threw himself over the wall and tried to cover the card up, Merlin crawled underneath him to peel it off.
“Ha!” Merlin jumped back on the bed, bouncing around and stopping Arthur from catching him. “I can’t believe you kept this!”
“Shut up!” Arthur tried to wrestle the card back off his boyfriend, but it wasn’t happening. Merlin was laughing too much, chucking the card under his shirt like Arthur had all those years ago. “Like that’s going to stop me.” Arthur snuck his hand down Merlin’s shirt, scrabbling for the card and tickling Merlin as he did. “You’ll rip it!”
Arthur got the card back, smoothing it out and holding it to his chest. He walked away from Merlin, and stuck it back to the wall. It wasn’t the most obvious thing on there, half hidden underneath a poster and tickets from a concert he and Merlin had gone to.
“I can’t believe you still have that.” Merlin said, his voice softer now. He dropped down to the mattress now, leaning forward to hold on to Arthur’s arm. “You softie.”
“Whatever, you’re the one who made it.” Arthur sat back on the bed, skin feeling prickly. He and Merlin weren’t mushy like this. “For Freya, anyway.”
“Oh you big baby!” Merlin was laughing now, plastering himself over Arthur. Merlin started kissing Arthur’s neck, pinning him down to the bed and smiling at him. “Ten years ago.”
“Ten years ago I managed to make a card for you…” But Arthur was laughing too. His hands rubbed along Merlin’s thigh, and he knew how happy he must look. Merlin leaned down, kissing him slowly, and Arthur started to forget about the card entirely.
“All my cards are for you now.” Merlin was still speaking, kissing Arthur’s throat as his hands played with the edges of Arthur’s t-shirt.
“I guess that will have to do, then.” But Arthur found it wasn’t a hardship at all, and he kissed Merlin back just as hard.