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1 November 1975
“Can I open my eyes yet?”
As annoyed as Severus was clearly trying to sound, Lily could see his signature scowl threatening to turn into a smile as he spoke.
“So impatient! We’re almost there,” she teased in response, giving his hand a little squeeze.
Lily had told herself that she was making him close his eyes and hold her hand while walking through the dungeons so that there was no chance he would guess at the surprise she had prepared, but there was also just something about holding Severus’s hand that made her heart soar. It was bony and cold and clammy, but it was perfect. It felt like running around outside together when they were young and their future seemed as wide as the summer sky above them. Their future didn’t seem so wide anymore, but at least there were still these small, simple moments with Severus that gave Lily hope that maybe even in that narrow future, there was still room for them to stand side by side.
Unfortunately, with a bump and a hissed “fuck!” from Severus, he pulled his hand away and Lily was reminded that these moments never seemed to last.
When Lily turned around to look at him, he was clutching his sock-clad foot with a grimace, seeming to have stubbed his toe on the base of one of the statues that lined every hall of the school.
“Oh. Sorry.” Lily did feel a bit bad, but it was hard to keep the amusement out of her voice nonetheless. In her defense, it was a rather silly situation to be in, on both of their parts.
“This is a safety hazard, Lily Evans. I don’t think Dumbledore would want to hear that one of his prefects is blinding students and taking them down into the dungeons to get injured!” Severus pointed his finger in her general direction as he spoke, but the intimidating effect he was clearly going for was quite weakened by the fact that he still had his eyes closed like the loyal friend he was. And the smile that played at his lips didn’t help either.
“Well, I don’t think Slughorn would want to hear that one of his Slytherins is walking around the castle without shoes on!” Lily replied with a grin, and watched with glee as an equally wide grin began to spread across Severus’s face in return.
“Touché.” He shrugged, and Lily thought she could see a bit of a blush forming on his cheeks, but maybe it was a trick of the light.
“I guess it’s our secret then.” Lily shrugged in return, playing along. “But fine, you can open your eyes. We’re almost there anyway.”
Having finally received permission, Severus did just that, and even in the dim light of the dungeons, Lily could see a playful glint in his eyes that almost made her feel as if they were little kids again.
“Where are we going?” He asked, finally letting go of his foot and obediently following Lily.
“You’ll see.” She turned around and grabbed his hand again, leading him to their favorite spot in the whole castle: the Potions classroom, of course.
By the time they reached the doorway, they were standing side by side. And Lily was grateful for that, as it meant that she could look over and get a good view of the look of awe and adoration on Severus’s face as he saw what was inside.
Lily had managed to transfigure the cauldrons that lay neatly on each table into jack-o’-lanterns, and had bought sweets in Hogsmeade that morning that she had strewn around them. The whole room, although it was darkening as the sun set outside, was illuminated by hanging strings of empty potion vials that Lily had stolen from Slughorn’s stores and filled with tiny orange flames.
She felt her heart flutter with joy at watching the flames dance against the dusky background of Severus’s eyes, which were filled with wonder at the sight before him.
“I felt bad that you had to miss the feast, so I thought I’d set up a make-up party. Just for us. I know it probably doesn’t look quite as good as the decorations in the Great Hall, but-”
“Oh, shut up, Lily. It looks amazing.”
Severus finally turned away from the scene in front of him and looked right into Lily’s eyes with a look of the utmost gratitude and deepest love. Lily couldn’t help but return his smile when she saw the warmth radiating from the depths of his eyes. Knowing that she had made Severus happy, and that he was still capable of feeling that sense of wonder—of magic—even after all these troubling years, was one of the best feelings in the world.
“Thank you,” he added, giving her hand a little squeeze. And Lily could tell he really meant it.
“Of course! You’re my best friend, Sev, it’s the least I could do!” Lily squeezed his hand in return, having really meant that, too. “Now, these sweets aren’t gonna eat themselves!”
Severus returned her widening grin and Lily’s heart soared. This was the sight she had so sorely missed at the feast, and she was endlessly grateful that she could still elicit a smile out of him. Even if very few things made him happy these days, at least she was one of them.
They went over and sat on one of the tables, Lily letting her fingers brush Severus’s ever so slightly. Perhaps it wasn’t exactly the best of manners to be sitting directly on the table, but Professor Slughorn was out for the evening, and what he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.
“I held off on the jelly slugs this time,” Lily paused to let Severus playfully roll his eyes at her, just as she had expected he would, “but I made sure to get some cauldron cakes. They’re your favorite, right?”
Severus nodded enthusiastically as he tore the wrapper off of one of the cakes on the table and took a bite. Even if everything else had changed, at least Lily still knew his favorite wizarding sweet.
As Lily began to unwrap one of the cakes herself, she watched as Severus chewed and stared into the distance with a look of absolute bliss on his face, and she wished she could make him feel that way forever, that he would never have to hurt again and she would never have to see that hollow look in his eyes that was becoming more and more the norm for him. But at least they had right now. And even though he had a few crumbs around his mouth, she was struck by how handsome he looked in the glow of the fire from the potion vials strung around the room, with the dots of light reflecting off his dark eyes and softly painting every angle of his face.
She blushed a little when he looked over at her and caught her staring, but he didn’t seem to notice, only smiling and wiping his mouth on his sleeve.
Really, he never seemed to notice. But that was alright. Lily was just grateful for those warm eyes and that crooked smile and the way he held her hand and reminded her of home and all that was good in the world—him, really—whether he ever noticed or not.