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Winter knew why he wasn't chosen to go to Pantala, but still couldn't help but feel a tiny bit miffed. He'd gone on just about every other expedition, every battle, and now he was told to sit here while Lynx – admittedly a really good choice for the mission – was sent off?
Yes, his research here with Humans was important. Yes, this would lead to a greater good. But they sent Moon to the new continent. Moon wasn't a fighter! Yet, Queen Glory was reluctant to send her husband – was he her husband yet? – Deathbringer. Deathbringer, the assassin. Deathbringer, someone who knew how to fight.
And yet, they sent Moon.
He wasn't doubting her skill at all. A telepath would probably be a really great addition. If he moved past his annoyance, Winter could see the benefit. But it still felt wrong to send a civilian into a war zone. Every other one was combat ready. Or, in the case of Cricket and Luna, had some experience in what they were up against.
Winter stalked the halls of Sanctuary, seeing the Silkwings put the final touches on their homes. Leafwings also got settled. He had a dozen questions for each tribe but held back on them. If he were younger, he might have thought them beneath him. If this were a few months ago, he wouldn't have stopped to consider their emotions before asking.
Now? Now, they just wanted to rest, to sleep. And being around another Icewing after Snowfall kicked them out of the kingdom was probably not one of their top priorities.
Instead, Winter made his way to the river, seeing a school of fish move down it. His stomach growled at the sight of them. Opening his jaws, a faint aura of frost flew over the river, creating a dam near where he stood. Fish smacked into it, make them easy prey for him to devour.
He couldn't help but chuckle a bit when he thought about it. Imagine being a fish, and then suddenly you run into an ice wall. If it wasn't so morbid for them, it might have been funny.
"Boo!"
Winter just about jumped out of his icy scales when a loud, female voice shouted in his ear. It was akin to that one time he saw a small rodent see its own reflection and fling itself halfway across the path he walked down. Only, Winter didn't fly that far.
Once his heart stopped fluttering, Winter looked to the source, finding a cackling Rainwing on her back. Her scales were light yellow with pink around her eyes and down her back. She was having a riot, tears streaming down her face. Her long, prehensile tail thrashed back in forth with her laughter.
"Was that necessary, Kinkajou?" Winter's gruff voice sounded… well, gruffer. It was the best he could do to hide the startlement.
"Absolutely," Kinkajou said through bursts of laughter. "Moons, you should have seen your face! I've never, ever, seen you get so flustered! Well, maybe around Moony, but I'm so happy I could see it again!"
In response, Winter was now giving her a death glare. His pointed snout, coupled with icy spikes on his head, neck, and horns, should have intimidated anyone. Especially with his dark eyes. Oh, he could be an ice revenant with this look.
Kinkajou merely looked at it and continued giggling.
"Well, I'm guessing you heard the news?" Winter decided to get off the subject of his embarrassment as quickly as possible.
"News?" Kinkajou rolled onto her stomach, looking at him with those wide violet eyes of hers. "What news? I mean, obviously, I found out about those strange dragons because they're everywhere. I was kinda hoping you'd fill me in?"
Winter stared blankly. "Queen Glory did not tell you?"
"Tell me what?" Kinkajou's mirth faded into annoyance.
With that, Winter took it as cue to explain what happened over the past few days. From the arrival of the Pantalan dragons, to the discovery of humanity, and the mission that his friends went off on earlier.
"Ooooh, I'm going to have some choice words for her!" Kinkajou's cheek frills spread as anger crossed her face. Her scale colors went dark red, and she shook with it. "How dare she not tell me! Her best friend! I went on dozens of dangerous missions and came out okay, and then she sends Pineapple? Who's Pineapple? I've never heard of any Pineapple, have you?"
"I haven't, no."
"Who does she think she is!?" Kinkajou bristled. "Where is she, Winter? I know she's here! I didn't run into her on the way back. I'm going to… to… I don't know, throw a pineapple at her! There, that's poetic justice for you!"
"I was also left behind," Winter pointed out.
At that, Kinkajou calmed slightly, her scales turning blue gray. Winter didn't know much of Rainwing colors, but he recognized this one to be sad. "Yeah… yeah, that's true." She sat down, huffing. "First you get exiled, then uninvited. I get left out of this whole thing! What did we ever do?"
"I think Peril was also uninvited to this."
"Well yeah, but I think she'd realize that going would burn down the whole forest," Kinkajou grumbled. She shot him a glance. "Why aren't you more upset about it?"
"Humans. And being allowed back from my home."
Her blue scales lightened. Curiosity, from what Winter recalled. "Queen Paranoia finally came to her senses? Oh Winty, I'm so happy for you!" Her scales turned gold, and she launched herself at Winter, pulling him into a tight embrace. Winter had no chance of stopping her.
And deep down, he kind of didn't want to. The physical affection he was just given, he never knew what to do with it. He wanted to return it. But then his Icewing heritage came in and said 'show no emotion'. But then he also cast aside his Prince hood. His cousin, Crystal, fell for a Mudwing after all!
In his confused emotions, he just stood there, staring blankly down at the golden spider monkey attached to his chest.
"Anyone ever tell you what a great hugger you are?" Kinkajou gave him a playful smile.
"Yes," Winter did his best attempt at a joke.
Kinkajou gasped at this, detaching herself and looking with mock horror. He knew it was mock because her scales hadn't changed. "Who are you? Winter never jokes!"
"H-hey, I have a sense of humor," Winter grumbled.
"Really? Because far as I could tell, your sense of humor is cold as ice."
Winter groaned.
"Not to mention your frigid personality."
"Please stop…" Winter looked away, annoyed.
"Icy you're not enjoying my puns, so I'll cool it," Kinkajou looked around, scales blue once again. "Hey, so, where are the humans? I wanna talk to them!"
"Daffodil is sleeping," Winter sighed. "Wren went to Pantala, too. So, no human for us to speak to right now."
"Aw," Kinkajou pouted. "Guess that just leaves yelling at Glory."
"I think she – hey, wait!"
Before Winter could finish his sentence, Kinkajou was already making moves to go find Glory. Without thinking, Winter reached out to grab her. He missed her shoulder, and instead grabbed her tail. Kinkajou whirled right around, long fangs bared before she realized who'd grabbed her.
"Sorry," Winter released her, looking away again. "I just didn't want you to run off without any direction."
"It's okay Winty, I forgive you," Kinkajou calmed down near instantaneously.
"Stop calling me that, it sounds… weird."
"Why?" Kinkajou tilted her head. "I add a 'y' to every name. It's affectionate!"
"Yes, but how would you feel if I said half your name and added a 'y'."
"Oh, that would be just Kin – Y'know what, I see your point."
Winter found it hard to remain stoic in his stance when inside he was trying not to laugh. Her face was disgusted, as if tasting a bitter fruit.
"So uh, where's Glory then?" Kinkajou looked at him hopefully.
"You're going to find her no matter what I say, aren't you?" Winter frowned. She nodded. "Alright, I'll show you to the chambers, but I want no part in your yelling match."
"But you have to be angry about being left behind too!" Kinkajou protested.
"Glory is not my queen," Winter responded. "And I am not eager to moan at Snowfall and have my banishment reinstated."
"Yeah, okay, you got a point…" Kinkajou frowned again. "I never wanted to ask, but since it got revoked… what happened?" She quickly turned away. "I-if you're okay talking about it."
Winter should've seen this coming. He stopped mid walk, serrated claws digging into the ground. Anger and frustration boiled over and he let out a heated sigh. The memories of what had transpired were locked deep in his mind and Kinkajou had just pulled at the chains. Not knowingly. She was far too innocent for that.
A few months ago, he would've bitten her head off for daring to ask.
And now…
"I'm not sighing at you," Winter shot her a glance. "It's just a… painful memory. One that will get easier with time, but one that still blisters and burns."
"We don't have to talk about it."
"No, it's fine," Winter said. He never did open up to anyone about it outside Qibli. And even then, it was largely cut short. Holding it in was not healthy, Riptide had said to him.
He was an Icewing, though. Emotions were meant to be kept in check. There was no such thing as therapy, at least not amongst the nobles. Any sign of weakness was a chance to be stabbed in the back and demoted. Maybe things have changed now, as Snowfall seemed far more compassionate than she was the last time they met. In a way, it reminded him of the early days of Jade Academy.
"I'll spare you the details of Icewing hierarchy, but the long story short is that my brother Hailstorm and I were sent into a trial cave," Winter continued walking, abet much slower. "Whoever came out first was promoted. Little did I know that it involved one of us killing the other."
"What?!" Kinkajou stopped, turning bright red. "Are you serious!?"
"Unfortunately," Winter nodded curtly. "The trial was to defeat an animus bound Nightwing named Foeslayer. I had assumed, at first, that the one to slay her was the one who passed. Wrong again, as she was merely part of it. One of us had to kill the other. Hailstorm refused, and I remained in the cave to escape. With Foeslayer, mind you."
The name Foeslayer seemed to elicit a response in Kinkajou. What it was, he couldn't tell.
"I could never return. Not without jeopardizing my brother's safety. And he had already been through a lot being Pyrite," he bristled at the name. "I hate animus powers. At least, ones that do that to someone."
"What do you mean, Pyrite?" Kinkajou raised a brow. "Wasn't she a Skywing that followed you like a pet?"
"Yes, that was an animus transformed Hailstorm," Winter bared his fangs, hissing. "He had two years of his life stripped away. He had no memory of who he was. Nothing. And when he came to, it was as if he had an identity crisis. I never, ever, want to see any dragon go through that. I almost would have preferred him being killed over being held hostage like that."
"Wait, was this when Shapeshifter or whatever tried to kill me? Cuz, I feel like I would have remembered that," Kinkajou scratched her head in thought. Winter nodded. "Ah, that makes sense. But what about someone like Darkstalker, who couldn't be killed? Would you accept that kind of fate for him?"
Winter had to think about that one. It was true the massive Nightwing couldn't be slain by other methods. Being somehow enchanted to be another dragon would solve the issue.
"No," Winter finally said. "Even for Darkstalker, I would not allow that level of torture. I briefly put on Pyrite's necklace, and I felt myself being washed away," he stared at his claws in rage. "You don't just die, Kinkajou. You lose your identity. Your soul. And you never, ever, come back the same. So no, not even Darkstalker would deserve that fate."
"I see," Kinkajou said mutedly. For some strange reason, she turned invisible for a moment. He thought he'd offended her before she spoke again. "I also have a dislike for Animus magic," she said becoming visible again.
"Oh?"
"Yeah, I was enchanted to fall in love with Turtle," Kinkajou huffed. "By his sister no less! To his credit, Turtle wanted none of that and Anemone was being a brat."
"That is… cruel, too," Winter shut his eyes to prevent himself from getting angry again. Yet another thing he learned out here.
"And now I'm stuck with the lingering feelings for Turtle that aren't real!" Kinkajou hissed. "He likes me, he told me so. But I just… I don't know if I ever can return the feelings! I'll never know if there was a hidden spell to keep it, or whatever! Every time I look at him, I still get that heart skip thing that I know isn't real! Anemone really messed me up with that! And poor Turtle!"
"Darkstalker manipulated my emotions, too," Winter nodded in understanding. "Not to love, but certainly like, him. It is as if your mind has a fog around it, and it is too thick to pass."
"Or when you're trapped in molasses and trying to break out, but it just keeps sucking you back in!" Kinkajou brightened. Winter raised a brow at her analogy. "Long story. Anyway, point is, you get it."
"Unfortunately."
"See, and you were worried about us not being able to bond," Kinkajou poked him with her tail.
"I never said that!" Winter snapped.
"No, but I saw it in your eyes when it was me who visited and not Moon or Qibli," Kinkajou giggled. "You were all like 'oh no, the loud one'."
"No, I never thought that," Winter shook his head.
"What?" Kinkajou snapped her head back to him.
"It… it meant a lot that you came," Winter looked away.
He remembered the look he gave her when she came. He was irritated that she let the human escape, not that she had arrived. Out of all his friends, the one he was the least close to was the one who reached out to him first. Not Qibli. Not Moon.
Kinkajou.
There were absolutely no words to describe what that meant for him. He thought was going to be alone for a lot longer. Yes, Riptide was great company once he shook off the Icewing haughtiness, but that wasn't the same. For someone that he went on adventures with, fought alongside with, to show up out of the blue – for him – it made his heart do something funny. He had no idea what it was to this day. All he knew was that for the first time since he met Moon, he felt warm. It was the same feeling he got when Qibli suggested the two of them get married.
Instantly, he froze. No, no way. Before he could think any longer on it, he yanked the thought back and brought it behind a shed.
"Really?" Kinkajou frowned. "I was just doing what friends should do."
"I know," he nodded.
"You mean to tell me that Moon and Qibli never visited!?" Kinkajou shouted loudly. A few passing Leafwings turned their attention to the pair. "Ooooh, that is it! When they get back, I am throwing Pineapples at all of them!"
"They were here yesterday."
"That doesn't count, and you know it doesn't!" Kinkajou snapped. "They were here because they had to be, not for you! Did they even say hi?"
"Admittedly, we were a bit busy, so-"
"I cannot believe them," Kinkajou cut him off. "Not only did they leave you behind, but they didn't even say 'hello'!"
"No, they did," Winter interjected before she could go off on her tirade. "We spoke with Wren. Caught up a bit there."
He wasn't going to say a word to Kinkajou, knowing full well how she was going to take the next bit. But when he saw them before they took off, Qibli and Moon were very noticeably closer to each other. The former looked like he had a weight taken off his shoulders. Moon absolutely beamed at him. It broke his heart to see it, but the satisfaction of seeing her happy kept it together.
Oh, and Qibli being happy too helped.
Winter had three guesses as to what happened that night and neither were worth thinking about for long.
"Oh," Kinkajou deflated a bit. "Still, they never even apologized for not seeing you, did they?"
"No," Winter shook his head.
"Alright, so my Pineapple plan is still in effect."
Winter let out a smile despite himself. It made him feel… wanted.
"You okay?" Kinkajou turned to him.
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"True," Kinkajou looked him up and down with those big eyes of hers. "It's just… seeing you smile like that, you look completely different."
Immediately, the smile vanished, and he turned away feeling warmth in his face.
"I didn't mean to embarrass you!" Kinkajou stood in front of him. "It's just… well, it makes me happy to see you happy."
Winter blinked. Once again, he felt something shifting inside of him. But his exterior remained as grumpy and stoic as ever, leading to a lack of movement. Or, for the briefest of seconds, signs of life.
"Oh… don't tell me nobody has ever said that to you," Kinkajou stared in disbelief. Winter didn't answer. "Nobody!?"
"They never needed to. I know you and the others cared about my happiness," Winter didn't look at her still. "I just wish I cared about yours earlier."
"Well, you do now, and that's what's important," Kinkajou placed a claw over his. He instinctively pulled away. Upon realizing, he slowly pushed it back.
"I suppose," Winter muttered.
"Hey, compared to the pompous bully I met back then, you've come a long way," Kinkajou said sweetly. "You need to give yourself credit."
"I suppose," Winter repeated, feeling his mind blank again. Positive reinforcement, the one thing to get him to pause.
Maybe he should seek some form of therapy…
"Alright, I think I see Glory going by," Kinkajou whipped her head around as a group of Rainwings went the other direction. "I'm gonna ambush her. Wish me luck."
"Good luck, I guess," Winter chuckled despite himself.
Kinkajou disappeared, and Winter was left alone. Already, he missed her company. He'd never admit it of course, but-
He felt lips on his cheek. The sudden interaction completely fried his brain and made him space out. His jaw dropped, eyes widening. Out of the corner of his gaze, he saw a pair of lavender eyes that belonging to only one dragon. If that wasn't a big enough give away, he heard Kinkajou's giggling right in his hear.
Unable to move, he heard Kinkajou dash off. After a few more blinks, he slowly raised a claw to where Kinkajou had kissed him. His face was completely dark blue, and he felt heat in his face that made it hard to see. Why was he getting this way? Over a Rainwing!? A loudmouthed, annoying little dragon that completely disrupted his day every time she showed up!
And yet, despite that thought process, he couldn't stop the smile that carved itself on his face. The first true, genuine smile he had in a long, long time.