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Then
For as long as he could remember, Clint always loved Christmas. Everything from the holiday food to the competitive light decorations, he loved every tinsley bit of it. It was a time in his childhood that he remembered his mom being happy, laughing and smiling. She loved the holiday and always managed to decorate their house for it. The decorations weren’t anything special or fancy, but they were there. The house had smelled like cookies and peppermint from the cheap candles she had all over. Christmas music played constantly from the radio or her old record player, her voice joining Bing Crosby or Aretha Franklin as they sung. He knew every Christmas carol by heart long before he went into foster care or to the circus. Even though their gifts came from the church or whatever aid group was giving stuff out that year, she made sure that Clint and Barney always had at least one gift that wasn’t clothes and just for them. Santa brought them a stocking every year filled with candy, oranges and some cheap little toys she picked up throughout the year.
As he grew older, cycling through foster homes and the circus, he never lost his love of the holiday. If anything, it grew stronger. When he was able to set up decorations, they were up before Thanksgiving, even if it was a little paper tree on a shelf or that tiny snow globe of the North Pole he still had from his circus days. Every year he made sure to send something to Miss Terra the Fortune Teller (Maddie to her friends) and her husband, Charlie. Sometimes it was a card with a gift certificate, other times a fancy gift basket, once a visit in person, which had turned into a mini reunion with the circus family.
Now that he was with SHEILD, Christmas had definitely become his favorite time of year. His quarters were decorated with a small tree, festive tchotchkes, lights, even holiday towels in the bathroom. Everyone Clint interacted with on a daily basis got a gift, from a holiday card to a Starbucks gift card to a more personalized gift. He’d been shopping around for a few months beforehand and made sure that he knew what they would like. Sheila in HR had loved the HUGE mug with the loose teas he’d given her. She had been looking out for him from his first day, meeting him for lunch to make sure he ate and was settling in alright. Her own son was around his age, so mothering Clint had been pretty easy. Klaus in Medical had been surprisingly easy to shop for. He was a gigantic Disney fan, especially loving Chip and Dale. Clint had tracked down a set of nutcrackers only available in the theme parks for his gift. He figured it was the least he could do with how often he was in Medical. Klaus always explained what was going on, how bad the injury was and how long until he could get back to shooting his bow. Klaus had even gotten him to join a weekly poker game with other medical staff, which was great since he got to know them outside of being drugged to the gills.
Which is why Clint now stood in front of Coulson’s office door, turning a brightly wrapped package over in his hands. It’d been a quick decision to buy the gift, something small for his new handler but he was wondering if it wasn’t enough. Maybe he should have bought him that tie he saw but decided against as being a bit much, maybe he should have gotten that impersonal Amazon card, maybe he shouldn’t have gotten him anything, maybe, maybe, maybe. He was so lost in thought that he didn’t notice the door opening.
“Agent Barton? Is there something you need?”
Clint blinked at his handler. “No sir, I mean, yes sir.” Sighing, he handed Coulson the gift. “Merry Christmas, sir.”
Coulson looked down at the package in his hands. He seemed confused.
“Christmas?” He looked up at Clint, brow furrowed like he was being interrogated.
“The holiday? You know, peace on Earth, Santa Claus?” Clint smiled his best aw-shucks grin. Maybe Coulson didn’t do Christmas? Shit, this was not how he wanted this to go. Coulson was the only handler that hadn’t fucked up his missions, not to mention he was the only one that didn’t think he was an illiterate hick.
“Right, right. Forgot that was this week. Holidays creep up pretty fast.” Coulson smiled at him, more like a twitch of his lips at the corners but it counted. “Well, thank you but I need to head off for a meeting if there was anything else you need.”
“Nope, just dropping this off before heading to Medical’s Christmas party. Have a nice night!” Clint waved as he headed off down the hallway. That went great, he thought, could he have been more awkward? Hopefully Coulson enjoyed the gift and wouldn’t remember their conversation.
Coulson walked back into his office, studying the gift. It was rectangular and the paper was various shades of shiny purple. Looking closely, he could make out a stamped design of holly and wreaths, pretty typical of his new specialist. The tag simply had his name, Phil Coulson, with Clint Barton as the giver. Shrugging, he ripped the paper off. Inside was a plain white gift box. Opening the box, he found a $25 Starbucks card and an industrial tumbler. The coffee tumbler was a new Stark model that had been touted as indestructible, perfect for people on the go. Coulson turned it over slowly. It was a perfect gift.
Now
Phil looked up as Natasha strode into his office. His paperwork was almost done and he was off for the next two weeks, barring any intergalactic mishap or Avengering incident, both of which were highly likely.
“What can I do for you Natasha?” He went back to signing his forms, capping his pen with a flourish as he finished.
“I’m here to take you Christmas shopping.” She looked steadily at him, one eyebrow delicately arched. He realized she was in casual clothes: sensible shoes, jeans and a simple sweater.
“Christmas…. Oh, no.”
“This is why you promised me to take you shopping this year. After the debacle last year, you said, and I quote, “If I haven’t gotten Clint a gift yet, I need you to drag me kicking and screaming to get him something better than this one!” Natasha shifted her weight, obviously preparing to do the aforementioned dragging with some probable tasing thrown in.
“It wasn’t that bad, if I remember right.” Phil looked at her hopefully, knowing he was wrong but clearly praying he wasn’t.
“Phil, it was terrible. He managed to find a vintage Howling Commandos USO poster in near mint condition, have Steve and Bucky sign it, get it certified, preserved and framed. He even got the surviving members of the original USO tour to sign next to their pictures! Do you know how many retirement communities he dragged me to? I never want to have a ninety year old woman offer to show me how flexible she still is ever again in my life! And what did you give him?” Her glare would have made icebergs melt. Phil cringed and mumbled something.
“What? I didn’t hear you.”
“I got him fuzzy elf socks and a pack of bath bombs.” His shoulders completely swallowed his ears. That had been a terrible moment when Clint had opened his gift. Thankfully he and Clint had been alone for their gift exchange. Clint did tell everyone that Phil’s gift had been perfect and exactly what he wanted. No one asked what it had been but Natasha knew, she knew everything.
“Phil, I know you love Clint but you give the worst Christmas gifts I have ever seen. I was raised in Russia by assassins and I know what a bad present is. Clint was raised by actual clowns and still manages to give great gifts.”
“I know, I know! I just never get around to getting anything and by the time I get to the stores, it’s too late. I just panic and grab whatever I think will work.” Even to his own ears, he sounded completely pathetic. He planned month long missions, held meetings with Dr. Doom and coordinated Avengers press conferences in minutes but couldn’t manage to get a decent Christmas gift for his boyfriend despite having a year to prepare. Last year’s socks and bath bombs were terrible but so were the mini lamps, cheap phone chargers, holiday stress balls and (worst of all) the scented tea light candles he’d given over the years, everything left over in the dollar bins or clearance sections of the stores. It was always last minute, always right before the stores closed. He never got there in time and never had any idea what to get Clint. Everything good was always gone and what was left was never quite good enough. So, in a panic, he bought whatever was quick and easy which usually ended up being cheap and tacky. Last year had been the last straw. He’d decided to get the best gift possible and set up Natasha as a last resort if things went awry.
So here he was, walking into Macy’s the afternoon of Christmas Eve to find the perfect gift for his perfect boyfriend. This year, he’d find it, especially with Natasha’s help. This year, it would be the best gift he’d ever given Clint and he would know it when he saw it. He had a good feeling about it. As they headed to the clothing department, their phones went off, sounding the Avengers call to assemble. “You are shitting me!” Natasha glared at the scandalized Macy’s elf as Phil fumbled with his phone. “What is the emergency? It better not be Stark wanting to upgrade the Rockefeller Center Tree.”
It turned out that Stark wasn’t the only one interested in the Rockefeller Tree.
After spending quite a few hours fighting robotic gingerbread men, defeating the villain of the week and coordinating the clean up of the remains of an 80 foot Norway Spruce, Phil was exhausted. The Avengers had all returned to the Tower, either for medical treatment or to celebrate Christmas Eve. There was no way he was going to look for Clint’s gift, the stores were all closed and if he found anything, it would end up being a pack of peppermint gum or holiday erasers the way his luck was going. He decided to just head back to the Tower and apologize to Clint in the morning.
Entering their apartment, he found Clint stretched out on the couch asleep with Elf playing on the TV. The only lights in the room were from either the television or the Christmas lights decorating the room. Clint was sound asleep with a Santa hat on his head. His t-shirt had a check list saying “Nice, Naughty, I Regret Nothing” and his pajama pants were decorated with candy cane wielding ninjas. Phil smiled softly as he leaned over to kiss his forehead. “Merry Christmas. I’m so sorry I didn’t find you a gift,” he whispered.
“What are you talking about?” He glanced down to see Clint’s puzzled face. Well, no time like the present to come clean.
“I did not get you a Christmas present. Natasha and I were shopping when the Assemble call came through. It’s too late to find you something and I am not buying you some last minute crap anymore.” Phil braced himself for Clint’s response, either relief that he would be spared another terrible gift or anger that Phil hadn’t even gotten him a gift card. (Dammit, a gift card, he should have gotten him one of those!)
“You were worried about getting me a gift? Phil, I have never expected you to get me anything. Sure, it’s always great to get something but I’ve never demanded that you get me anything.” Clint sat up, pushing the hat back in place.
“I know! But you always get me something and it’s always amazing! Every year I barely manage to get you anything and it’s always something cheap, tacky or just awful! I gave you fuzzy elf socks last year for God’s sake!” Clint just looked at him, then he started laughing.
“Babe, it’s fine! I love those socks. Besides, my mom always said that the joy of giving is in the giving, not the receiving. As long as the gift came from the heart, it didn’t matter what it was. I know I go overboard for the holidays but it’s because I can and I love giving people things they will like. I love every gift you gave me, from the phone chargers to the little candles. It's a gift from you, something you gave me to show how much you love me. The fact that you even tried to get me something is a gift in itself. I like whatever you give me because it’s from you.” Phil just sat there, staring at Clint.
“I have an idea, How about you join me here on the couch and we watch the movie together. Maybe if we’re lucky, we’ll catch Santa leaving something in our stockings.” Clint waggled his eyebrows at him with a wide grin. Laughing, Phil slid in next to him on the couch. “Alright, but next year, I’m getting you something amazing.” Clint smiled, pulling Phil in close to him. “Whatever you say Phil, whatever you say.”