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For the first time in a week, Dojima gets to come home early.
It’s not much, but he still treats it like a celebration. A small victory, if it means he gets to spend more time with Yu and Nanako. No doubt the kids have already had dinner, but he might as well get them some late dessert from Junes.
He pushes the door open, only to find the TV playing to an empty room. Usually Nanako is sat right in front of it, but no, Nanako doesn’t seem to care about the noise, far too enamored with whatever she’s doing in the kitchen. She doesn’t even realize he’s there until he clears his throat.
“Oh, Dad!” She doesn’t sound as happy as she normally does. “I didn’t think you’d be home tonight.”
Dojima doesn’t even have time to question why she sounds so guilty before he takes notice of the lit stove.
“Nanako, you know you’re not supposed to use the stove by yourself,” Dojima scolds. He takes another glance, finally noticing what’s sitting in the boiling water. “Is that a baby bottle?”
Upon closer inspection, yes, it is. It looks much too big for an actual baby, but maybe that’s one of the toys Nanako bought herself with her allowance?
“Are you playing house?”
Nanako smiles and nods, but there’s something off in the way she does so. “Mhm! Yep, that’s it!”
Dojima frowns. Nanako has never lied to him before. It stuns him, but it only makes those alarm bells in the back of his mind ring a little more loudly.
“Nanako.” It’s his best attempt at sounding stern, which is arguably the only part of parenthood he’s actually good at. “You know you’re supposed to be honest with me.”
And she shrinks back. It breaks his heart, especially when she looks up at him with those sad brown eyes of hers, but he can’t go letting her think it’s okay to lie to him.
“I know, but…” She trails off, and if possible, her eyes only get sadder. “I’m not allowed to tell you.”
His mind instantly goes wild with worst-case scenarios. Bullying, abuse, the kind of stuff that makes his stomach turn. Nothing good ever comes from things kids “aren’t allowed” to tell grown-ups.
“Nanako, you have to tell me.” And maybe the edge of panic in his voice is unwarranted, maybe he’s not acting the most rationally, but he could never forgive himself if something were to happen to Nanako.
“But I promised…” Nanako protests.
“Nanako,” Dojima warns. “This is not up for debate. There’s no way I can make sure you’re safe if you’re keeping secrets from me.”
The creak of the stairs draws his attention. Here he thought Yu had been out and about, but he’d been upstairs the entire time. And he’d just let Nanako use the stove?
“Get down here!” His tone is sharper than he intended, if evidenced by the way Nanako flinches. He’s out of his element, but that doesn’t mean he’s going to stop digging his grave even deeper.
Yu silently plods over, and the nervous way he’s holding himself only sets off more alarm bells. Yu’s never had a problem with standing up straight, but now his shoulders are hunched and his head is down. Like he’s trying to make himself smaller.
“Big bro isn’t feeling well,” Nanako says. “I told him to take a nap upstairs so he can get his strength back.”
This lie is a little more practiced than her previous one, but Dojima can tell right away she isn’t telling the truth.
Dojima folds his arms, trying to remember his good behavior. Even if he’s scared out of his wits, he shouldn’t be raising his voice here. Especially at Yu.
So he tries again, quieter this time. He levels his gaze at Yu, knowing he’ll get much further with Yu than he will with Nanako. “Now, something is going on here. I trust you, and I think I’m owed some honestly, don’t you?”
From the way Yu’s brows furrow, he’s just one little push away from cracking, but before he can try, Nanako’s jumping between them.
“Leave big bro alone!” Nanako snaps.
Dojima can count all the times she’s raised her voice to him on one hand, and that alone is enough to stun him into silence.
“He’s not hurting anyone so don’t be mean to him! He needs rest!”
There’s something different in Nanako’s behavior. It’s less from admiration and fear, more… protectiveness, if he had to put a word to it. Like the way she gets with some of her classmates, or with cute animals.
His eyes cut to Yu, who hasn’t said a word. Who’s been watching Dojima with wide, nervous eyes since he came downstairs. Who keeps cutting nervous glances at the baby bottle when he thinks Dojima isn’t paying attention. And slowly the pieces come together.
“Is this… for you?”
It’s a ridiculous guess. After all, what teenager needs a baby bottle? But it’s bigger than one for a baby, and his sister had warned him that Yu’s behavior could be unpredictable. That some days he’d be in his head and he wouldn’t be acting quite as mature as he usually did. Dojima guesses this is the extreme version of that statement.
And then, much to his surprise, Yu nods.
“Sometimes big bro doesn’t feel so big,” Nanako explains. Dojima doesn’t miss how she steps in front of Yu, making a shield between her dad and her big brother. “And it’s my job to take care of him.”
Great. Yu just couldn’t stop testing his weak spots, could he? Dojima’s never been great with children, especially younger ones, but now it seems like he has two under the age of ten.
So he shifts gears, using the voice most reserved for traumatized teens and hysterical women. “You do a good job, don’t you?”
Nanako grins. “Mhm! It’s like playing house. I always want to play the mommy anyway.”
Her hand slips into Yu’s, half a comfort, half a reassurance, and the tension in Yu’s shoulders decreases by just a tick.
Okay, so her hackles are down at least. Now he just has to focus on Yu. He doesn’t expect many answers, but if he can just convey he understands, that might be enough.
“So… what? Is this like some sort of second childhood or something?” It sounds familiar, vaguely reminiscent of the psychology courses he had to take in college.
Yu nods, not meeting Dojima’s eyes. He probably knows all too well the negative implications that come with his coping mechanism.
Dojima isn’t going to sit here and pretend it isn’t weird. If it were anyone else, he’d tell them to man up and not drag other people into their problems. But this is Yu, the lonely-looking kid he picked up from the train station, that miraculously pieced their broken little family back together one shard at a time.
Nanako’s watching him, waiting for his reaction, and Yu is still staring at the floor, braced for impact.
Poor kid nearly jumps out of his skin when Dojima places a hand on his shoulder.
“Listen, I know my sister, and I know she loves you with all her heart. But I know she’s not exactly the most dependable person to have around.”
Yu doesn’t say anything, but his eyes well up with tears, telling Dojima he’s right on the money.
His sister is dedicated and fiercely independent, but at the end of the day, when she loses interest, she finds another project to sink her everything into. He’d always hoped that her own son had been an exception, but clearly, that isn’t the case.
“You just… do whatever you usually do. I’m not even here.”
Nanako tightens her grip on Yu’s hand. “Thank you, Dad.”
A chime from the TV has Yu perking up. The end credits are playing to that Featherman show Nanako loves.
“Oh, it’s almost time!” Nanako says. “Go wait on the couch, okay?”
Nanako turns off the stove, carefully removing the bottle and wrapping it in a soft cloth. Dojima probably wouldn’t have batted an eye, but he thinks the cartoon fish pattern is something Yu would’ve picked out for himself, not for Nanako.
“We watch this show together whenever big bro isn’t feeling so big,” Nanako explains.
Dojima glances back at the TV. Commercials are still playing, but Yu is watching with anticipation, his back straight and his knee jiggling ever so slightly. Just how often does this happen? And is it triggered by something or does it just happen without warning? Part of Dojima wishes he’d kept that “I’m not even here” comment to himself, but as it is, he won’t pester them with questions. Not yet, anyway.
“Here you go, baby bro,” Nanako says, handing him the bottle. “It’s not as warm as you like it, though. Is that okay?”
Yu nods.
She sits a good distance from him, though Dojima only understands why after Yu curls up on his side, his head resting against her lap.
Yu shifts, getting comfortable before he tucks the teat of the bottle into his mouth. His eyes droop right away, and he continues to watch TV through half-lidded eyes. Dojima awkwardly joins them a beat later.
“You have to be really nice with baby bro,” Nanako tells him. “Things get to be too much really easy.”
Dojima nods. He had a feeling Yu had some sort of sensory issues, but he could only imagine those would be amplified in this… smaller headspace.
Nanako leans forward. “Is it okay if I touch your hair?”
Yu gives a slow, distant nod.
“Yay!” She threads her fingers through his hair, then looks at her dad very seriously. “You always have to ask first. That’s the number one rule.”
“There are rules?”
Nanako nods. “Just a few.”
“So you can’t touch him without asking first…” Dojima trails off, allowing Nanako to take it from there.
“And if we go anywhere, he has to hold my hand so he doesn’t wander off.”
Dojima can’t help the grin that comes to his face. He’d heard tons of stories about how cute his nephew was, leading little Nanako around Junes while they went shopping. He would’ve never suspected that was for Yu’s sake and not hers.
The opening song ends, ushering in the beginning of the episode, and Yu gasps softly as a cartoon frog hops on screen.
“Wow, he really likes this show, huh?”
Nanako immediately hushes him. “You aren’t allowed to talk until commercial break,” she tells him in a stern whisper.
He can’t stop the chortle that bubbles in the back of his throat, but he makes sure to pitch his voice in a comically low whisper. “Sorry, then.”
Every so often, Yu will bounce his knees or wiggle his shoulders, both of which Dojima is incredibly familiar with. Kid’s been pulling those moves since he was a baby, and frankly it’s a relief to have telltale signs that Yu is happy.
Dojima shifts his attention to the television, wondering what has Yu so entranced. It’s nothing special, just a cartoon intended for young, young audiences. From what he can piece together, a baby frog is going on adventures with all his friends from the pond. Then again, maybe if this is about relaxing and turning your brain off or whatever, then it’s probably just what he needs.
When the commercial break finally rolls around, Nanako explains everything to him. Froggie-kun is Yu’s favorite show, and whenever he’s feeling small, they always have to watch it. Yu used to make the bottles for himself, but Nanako insisted she should be able to help. It’s actually only her second time making one.
Nanako wasn’t supposed to find out, though. And she hadn’t meant to push or be nosy, but one time he came home in tears and that had really scared her. She hadn’t really given him a choice to do anything but sit on the couch and watch TV with her, and pretty soon it became a routine whenever he was feeling less than great.
“It took a long time for big bro to finally tell me everything,” Nanako says. There’s a hint of pride in her voice as she continues, “I had to be really nice and make sure he felt safe telling me first.”
Dojima nods along, trying not to be too judgmental. He has questions, yes, but he’d much rather be asking them to a fully adult Yu, even if that means waiting until the morning. Frankly, he’s just glad his kids trust one another.
The commercials end, and Nanako shushes him even though he wasn’t speaking. Still, it’s hard not to grin at the way Yu happy bounces when the little frog comes back on screen.
After a while, Nanako lays her head on top of Yu’s. Sitting at that angle can’t be comfortable for either of them, but it seems to soothe them both. Yu is all but asleep, and it doesn’t look like it’ll be long before Nanako is too.
The bottle he’s drinking from is almost empty, the last bits of milk sitting pooled at the bottom. Dojima’s long-buried paternal instincts grumble to life, prompting him to tip the bottle up so Yu is drinking something other than air.
It’s bedtime—for both of them—but Dojima knows better than to bring it up right away. So he cuts them both a little slack and lets their frog show come to a conclusion first, even if Yu’s eyes have been shut since the last commercial break.
Dojima runs a hand through Nanako’s hair. “Alright. I think it’s time for you both to get ready for bed.”
“But there’s one more episode,” Nanako whines, rubbing tiredly at her eyes. She’d been dozing too, and it makes Dojima uneasy to think she might be staying up too late for Yu’s sake.
“Come on, no arguing. I can take it from here.” Dojima shoos her in the direction of the stairs, and while she spares him an uneasy glance, she doesn’t fight him.
Yu blinks awake. He looks in no position to be walking upstairs, and Dojima’s in high enough spirits to cut him that slack.
“Alright, bedtime for you too.” Dojima isn’t nearly as strong as he wants to be, but he works out when he can, and he likes to think he’s fairly strong.
He lifts Yu up bridal style, and while his knees immediately protest, it’s worth it to see the look of pure surprise on Yu’s face.
This time Dojima can’t help chuckling. “Hold on, okay? I don’t want you to fall.”
Yu glances between him and the floor, silently deliberating. In the end, he must’ve decided it wasn’t worth it to risk falling, and silently wraps his arms around his uncle’s neck.
The trip upstairs isn’t the easiest, but Dojima manages. Good to know Yu’s been eating well at least.
“Can you get the door?”
For a split second, Dojima wonders if Yu really understands what he’s saying. There are times where Yu gets spacey, and he doesn’t always process what’s being asked of him. What if this… headspace of his operated the same way?
But before Dojima can just open the door himself, Yu stretches out an arm and does it for him. Then, carefully, he winds his arm back around Dojima’s neck.
It’s instinct, almost natural, for him to say, “Good job, kiddo!”
Yu flushes at the praise, unable to stop the happy wiggle in his shoulders.
As he progresses inside, Dojima barely manages to dodge the table in the center of Yu’s room. He’d never realized how that table sat perfectly at shin height until it was his shin on the line.
“There you go.” He gently lays Yu down on the blankets, letting Yu situate himself under the covers.
Yu doesn’t say anything, just gets burrowed in, and goes back to watching Dojima with wary eyes. As if asking why he’s here. Frankly, Dojima isn’t too sure himself, but he doesn’t like the idea of leaving the poor kid to his own devices so quickly.
“Something you need?” he asks.
Little kids like plushies, right? If he’s got a bottle, it probably wouldn’t be too crazy to think he has some sort of toy as well.
He follows Yu’s gaze to a hand-sewn bunny on the table, with Yu’s name carefully stitched into its left foot. “Oh, you want this?”
Yu doesn’t answer, not even with a nod or a shake of his head. Dojima can’t blame him for freezing up. This is new for both of them. Not to mention extremely unexpected.
He places the bunny on the side of Yu’s bed, allowing him to accept or reject the gift without issue. Almost immediately, Yu’s arm snakes out from under the blankets, pulling the bunny close to his chest.
Dojima draws the covers up around Yu’s neck, making sure to carefully tuck the blankets so his bunny can breathe too.
“Sleep tight, kiddo.”
Dojima hangs around the following morning.
He usually isn’t here to see the two of them off to school, but it wouldn’t hurt to be late today.
Yu isn’t even all the way down the stairs. All he has to do is catch Dojima’s eyes and his face is flushing red. “It won’t happen again.”
He doesn’t elaborate further than that. Part of Dojima just wants to cut the poor kid loose, but that will hardly do either of them any good. He’s learned the hard way that avoiding things will only make it worse.
“If that’s what you want,” Dojima says simply. “But if you want someone to carry you up to bed, you know who to call.”
It’s simple, to the point, but it’s enough to give Yu pause. He dares a glance back at Dojima, the slightest hint of suspicion flashing through his eyes.
“You don’t think it’s weird?”
“Kind of.” Dojima cringes at the way Yu’s face falls, and rushes to continue his thought, “But that just means you have the chance to explain it to me.”
Yu doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t answer, but he isn’t making a break for the door either.
Dojima decides to press a little harder. “I was thinking coming home early tonight. Would you be in the right headspace to talk?”
“Yesterday was a special circumstance.”
Dojima doesn’t like the sound of that. “Everything okay?”
Yu avoids his eyes again. “Stress…”
“Stress, huh?” Something about that answer rubs him the wrong way, but Dojima doesn’t dare push. “Well, I’m sure you’ve got a lot on your plate. Glad you found something that could help.”
There’s more he wants to ask. If those friends of Yu’s have any idea. If he ever gets stressed at school and needs to be bailed out. …If he’s ever had anyone look after him before coming to Inaba.
But those answers will come in time, and for now, he has to cut the poor kid loose.
“Shouldn’t you be heading off to school? You don’t wanna be late.”
Yu nods. The relief is palpable in his shoulders. “See you tonight.”
He wastes no time making his escape, and Dojima lets him do so. He has to get to work anyway, but things will come easier now that he has that ordeal off his mind.
He wasn’t intruding, and neither Nanako nor Yu hates him for butting in when he wasn’t supposed to. Remembering that look in Nanako’s eyes, that had been the fear that clung to him throughout the night. But he’s getting his answers, and no one’s been hurt.
And if he does research on his own time, well, that’s nobody’s business but his own.