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Ainosuke sat back in his chair with a sigh, rubbing his forehead in a vain attempt to stave off an impending headache. Not only was his concentration flagging, but the words on the screen had started to swim in front of his eyes. Across the room, he saw Tadashi still typing on his laptop, looking as tired as he felt.
"Alright," Ainosuke announced decisively, "we'll continue this in the morning, Tadashi."
"Yes, Ainosuke-sama," Tadashi replied obediently. Ainosuke stood and stretched the tension out of his neck. The Tokyo skyline winked at him through the office window, the roads still busy with cars despite the late hour. Though he found himself in the city often, he didn't much enjoy the constant busyness, the ever present feeling of urgency. Slow was not often a pace he sought for himself, but he was starting to see the appeal of it these days. When he turned away from the window, Tadashi had already packed their things. Wrapped in his grey coat, Ainosuke thought he looked even more washed out and tired than before. The only spot of colour was the checkered green scarf he wore, one that Ainosuke had given to him second-hand many years ago.
"It doesn't suit me," he had said before tossing the scarf towards Tadashi carelessly. Now it appeared every year, wrapped warmly around his secretary's neck. Ainosuke’s fingers itched to touch it, to see if it was as worn and soft as it looked.
“Are you ready to leave, Ainosuke-sama?” Tadashi asked, curiously. Ainosuke nodded and busied himself with his own scarf.
“Let’s go.”
When they stepped outside the office, the night was crisp and still. At this time of year, it was cold enough for him to be grateful for the gloves Tadashi had remembered to pack. Ainosuke drew a deep breath, the icy air lifting some of his fatigue.
"I'll call a taxi," Tadashi said at once, pulling out his phone. Maybe it was something in the night air, but Ainosuke felt strangely reluctant to go back to the hotel. If they were in Okinawa, he would have insisted on a skate to clear his head, but as it was...
"Shall we go for a walk together first?" He suggested and Tadashi looked at him with faint surprise. "I don't feel like returning just yet."
"Of course," he said immediately and put his phone away. Ainosuke started walking in the direction of the main street and Tadashi followed half a step behind him.
"Tadashi," Ainosuke said at once, warningly.
"Sorry." He closed the distance until they were walking side by side. While the silences between them were no longer fraught with painful history, it wasn't exactly comfortable yet, either. Old habits were hard to break and Ainosuke often wondered whether he ought to just smash them all to pieces. Caution was never his strong point, after all. Ainosuke hooked his arm around Tadashi’s and deliberately dragged him closer. “Ainosuke-sama?” He asked, sounding uncertain.
“I’m cold,” Ainosuke said, by way of explanation. Fortunately, Tadashi didn’t argue with the vague excuse and though his arm remained stiff against him, Ainosuke was not deterred. Arm in arm, they walked together down the city street. Everywhere he looked, there were glittering ornaments, colourful lights, and beautiful shop window displays. There were also plenty of people still about — mostly drunk office workers and couples walking hand in hand.
"Is there some occasion today, Tadashi?" Ainosuke asked with bemusement.
"It's December 24th. Christmas Eve," Tadashi supplied promptly.
"I didn't realise," Ainosuke mused thoughtfully. "Don't you usually visit your father on Christmas?"
"I'll see him tomorrow evening when we return.”
"You should have said something. You know I don't keep track of these sorts of dates," Ainosuke said with a frown. "Go back on an earlier flight tomorrow and spend the day with your father. I'll finish off here and—"
"Respectfully, Ainosuke-sama, I’ll finish my work with you here as planned," Tadashi interrupted. Ainosuke considered arguing, but there was a stubborn set to his mouth that he knew well. He bit back a smile.
"Do whatever you want," he allowed, secretly pleased by his insistence. The tension in Tadashi's face relaxed and they continued their walk in companionable silence. Ainosuke slowed as he spied a park filled with brightly decorated stalls; there was the smell of sugar and cinnamon in the air, gifts and knick-knacks for sale, and the odd festival game.
"Shall we take a look?" Ainosuke asked.
"Yes, Ainosuke-sama."
The small Christmas market was filled with colour and light. They meandered among the stalls leisurely, Ainosuke content to simply watch the revelry and occasionally pass glances to the man beside him. There was a bit more colour in Tadashi's cheeks now and though he still wore a serious expression, he seemed charmed by the festive scene. As children, he had always been the one to get most excited around this time of year; it made Ainosuke feel lighter to realise that not everything had changed since then. However, Ainosuke’s good mood soured a little when he caught Tadashi lifting his hands to his mouth to warm them.
"Where are your gloves?" Ainosuke demanded, finally noticing how pale and cold his fingers looked.
"I left them in Okinawa," Tadashi replied apologetically.
"You packed mine and didn't even think about yours? Typical." Ainosuke tugged off one of his gloves and thrust it towards him unceremoniously. "Put this on."
"Ah, but—" Ainosuke silenced him with a pointed look. Tadashi pulled on the offered glove reluctantly. It was easy then to take his other hand in his and draw it into his coat pocket. Tadashi’s skin was almost burning cold against his palm.
"Better?" Ainosuke asked, rubbing his thumb gently over the back of it.
"Yes," Tadashi mumbled, looking faintly embarrassed, but not unhappy, he thought.
They continued their slow exploration until they reached the end of the market stalls and the sounds of laughter fading to the background. Here the bare trees had been decorated with fairy lights, lending the winter night a dreamlike quality. Without a word, Ainosuke directed them to a park bench and they sat down side by side. It was very late now and Ainosuke supposed they should finally return to their hotel, but that feeling was back again — the sour reluctance for the evening to be over, for this moment in particular to end.
"Ainosuke-sama," Tadashi said suddenly. When Ainosuke looked over at him, he looked strangely nervous.
“What is it?” Tadashi reached into his coat pocket and drew out a small rectangular package.
"Merry Christmas," he replied simply. Ainosuke blinked, a little bit taken aback. “It’s nothing much, but…” Tadashi trailed off. It had been years since Ainosuke had received a gift of any kind from him. Until recently, their relationship had not exactly encouraged that sort of thing. Ainosuke took the unexpected present and tore away the plain brown wrapping paper, heart racing to see what was inside. Tadashi watched him as he did, his expression uncertain and hopeful all at once. The wrapping paper fell away, revealing a small box of chocolates, each piece individually wrapped in glinting gold foil. They were the cheap kind, the sort one could buy easily from the convenience store, but Ainosuke understood the significance of the choice immediately. He took a piece of chocolate from the box with relish.
“It’s been years since I’ve eaten this,” Ainosuke said with a smile. The sweet and creamy taste took him back in an instant, to a distant memory of secret gift exchanges as children, to the acute pleasure he had felt to receive any Christmas gift at all, much less from his favourite person in the world. “You're surprisingly sentimental, you know that?"
"Sorry," Tadashi responded, immediately contrite. “I should have I bought you a more expensive brand, but I—”
"It wasn't a complaint," Ainosuke said, firmly cutting him off. He plucked another chocolate from the box with a contemplative look. "Back then, I would always try and make these chocolates last for as long as I could. I figured out that if I only ate one a week, they would keep until February." He smiled ruefully at the memory. "One year, my aunts managed to find them and I had to throw out half the box. I was so upset."
"I didn't know that," Tadashi replied with faint surprise.
“I knew you’d be sad if I told you, so I never did.” Ainosuke shrugged, putting the rest of the chocolates safely away in his coat pocket for later. "Thank you, Tadashi,” he said finally, the gratitude unfamiliar on his tongue.
“You’re welcome, Ainosuke-sama.” Tadashi paused. “...I wanted to start the tradition again. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Of course not. Though… I don't have a present for you."
"I wasn't expecting anything in return," Tadashi assured him quickly.
"Well, you're getting something," Ainosuke insisted. He knocked their shoulders together lightly. "Tell me what you want. You know the price is irrelevant."
“No, I... I'm happy with how things are,” Tadashi replied slowly. “This is enough.”
“How can you want so little?” Ainosuke complained, only half-joking. “I’m offering you anything you want and you really have nothing to ask for?” Tadashi smiled, a little self-deprecatingly.
“I don’t need money. My salary, plus the bonus I’ll receive at the end of the year, is more than enough for myself and my father,” he said, looking down at his hands rather than at Ainosuke. “All I want is… to not be away from you." His words were honest and direct, nothing held back or half-hidden — that, in itself, was like a gift. That Tadashi could say it so plainly now was a sign of how far they had come. Even so, Ainosuke thought there was still a way to go yet.
"Is this really enough? I mean… I didn’t say your present had to be material.” Tadashi blinked at him with wide-eyed surprise and Ainosuke grinned. “Come on, puppy, have a little imagination,” he murmured and tangled a hand in Tadashi's soft green scarf to pull him in.
Tadashi's lips were cold at first, but he quickly warmed under Ainosuke's touch. He was suddenly reminded of their first kiss, many years ago beneath some mistletoe he had pretended not to know the meaning of and had innocently asked Tadashi to demonstrate to him. This was a little different, of course. For one, when Ainosuke opened his mouth to deepen the kiss, it certainly wasn’t innocent. They were both breathing a little harder when they pulled away from one another, the distance between their bodies that much closer than before.
“So?" Ainosuke asked, a little more unsure than he intended.
“It's the best present I’ve ever received, Ainosuke-sama,” he replied matter-of-factly and touched his fingers gently against Ainosuke’s jaw, the gesture saying more than words ever could. Ainosuke smiled, happiness bubbling out of him like a spring, uncontainable.
“Oh, but you haven’t even unwrapped it yet,” he teased, touching a thumb to Tadashi’s bottom lip. A thrill of anticipation ran through him at the way Tadashi’s eyes darkened in response and they way he reached for him this time, more boldly than before.
"Call the taxi, Tadashi," Ainosuke suggested many minutes later.
"Yes, Ainosuke-sama.” As Tadashi pulled out his phone to make the call, Ainosuke found his hand again and tucked it back inside his pocket with a squeeze. He could hardly feel the cold anymore, felt nothing but warm from his fingertips to his toes. Christmas had rarely been special to him, but just like a miracle, it had been transformed. This was the beginning of a tradition all of their own — Ainosuke looked forward to the coming years, knowing that every Christmas from now on, Tadashi would be there.