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5 DAYS BEFORE THE ALLEYWAY ALTERCATION
Dazai Osamu was not having a good week.
It had all started when Atsushi and Kyouka returned to give their mission report two days ago. They knew full well they’d failed; but they had no idea why. The Mafia’s strongest duo, nearly decimated, an entire squad of mafioso killed. They wanted an explanation. More than that, they wanted to give a punishment.
Yet the news Atsushi had brought them rocked their very world. Chuuya Nakahara is back, and determined to mess up every inch of Dazai’s life - despite the two of them not even meeting face-to-face. Their ex-partner is the only person on the face of the planet who could achieve such a feat. Really, he should be honored.
The punishment they had given Atsushi was… perhaps a tad harsh, they’ll admit it. But the boy will never learn unless it’s drilled into him, they tell themselves. After all, Mori taught them this way. Yosano had learned this way. They’d used the method on Q (no matter how unsuccessful that had turned out to be), so it would work on Atsushi. Fuck whatever Chuuya said. Fuck him, and Kouyou, and Q, and every little do-gooder in that stupid little Detective Agency. Dazai doesn’t care.
They’ll crush them all.
Still, Dazai’s mind won’t stop wandering. What is the Agency like, they wonder? Does Chuuya still have daily tea with Kouyou? Do they share it with others? Just who is this Oda Sakunosuke, that he was persuasive enough to make Chuuya leave? They think about it a lot more often than usual, and they can’t seem to make the thoughts go away.
“Hey, Dazai.” Akiko says, walking up to them. They’re pretty sure they locked the door to their office, but Akiko stole their spare key a few years ago. It’s okay. They don't mind. They always have time for Akiko.
“Akiko.” They say, shooting her a small smile. “How are you? How are things going?”
She purses her lips. “Not… well. Can we not talk about this? I’m so sick and tired of hearing about it. Everybody ’s talking about it.”
“Sure.” They reply. “In that case, what do you want to talk about?”
Akiko opens her mouth, then closes it. Opens it again. Nothing comes out. Dazai stifles a chuckle.
“Alright, fine…” She sighs, dropping down into the chair before Dazai. “I’ve been so frazzled for the last few days. I mean, Kouyou’s back . I don’t know what to make of that. And Ranpo is absolutely no help.”
Dazai smiles. “You know I’ve always hated Ane-san. It’s no secret, don’t look so scandalized, it’s the truth and you know it, Akiko. But she made you happy. I think you guys should try it again.”
She lets out an incredulous huff. “Try it again? Dazai, you do remember how it ended, right? She left in the middle of the night with- hey, with your partner!” Her expression turns gleeful. “This isn’t just about me, is it? How are you feeling about Chuuya being back?”
Very, very quickly, their expression slips into a scowl.
“That’s not important.” They say, frowning. “I don’t like Chuuya. Chuuya doesn’t like me. I don’t care.”
Akiko sighs. “I know that’s not true, but I’m too busy and tired to argue with you right now.” She stands up, heading for the door. “Let’s just hope, for your sake and mine, this whole thing blows over.”
Dazai doesn’t respond. They’re still frowning. Still mulling over what Akiko said, and the blatant lies they had spoken.
“Oh, by the way-” Akiko sticks her head back in the door-, “-Mori-san wants to see you in his office.”
Dazai drops their head into their hands.
Great.
・・・
“Ah, Osamu. There you are.” Mori smiles, cold and empty and everything Dazai hates. “I was beginning to wonder if Akiko had failed to pass on the message.”
They gesture limply with their arms. “Here I am.”
“I assume you’re aware of the situation?” Mori asks. There’s poison in his very voice. Perfectly pointed barbs, aimed at Dazai’s weakest spots.
They swallow thickly. “I am aware of the Armed Detective Agency, yes. Is there a particular reason you called me here? I’m a busy person, Mori-san, I have a lot to do. Jobs, missions, reports, being an-”
“Osamu.” Mori is cold, impassive, and unopposed. Dazai shuts up in an instant. They wonder what people - what Atsushi - would think if they saw them now. The Demon Prodigy, powerful and terrifying, cowering before a mere man. Stuttering and rambling. It’s pathetic. It’s embarrassing. It’s all Dazai can afford to do.
“Yes?”
“I have a… mission for you. Something I need done, but something I can only entrust to the most talented of people. Atsushi-kun does not have the spine, Akiko does not have the restraint. Kyouka would be too risky, and the Black Lizard would create too much commotion. So, I’ve settled on you. Do you accept it?”
Dazai sighs. “You and I both know this isn’t a choice, Mori-san. Just tell me. What do I have to do?”
“Alright, you asked for it.” Mori hums, eyes glittering. “Osamu, I’d like for you to kill Chuuya-kun.”
Something shatters.
Whether it’s Dazai’s heart or the very world around them, they don’t know.
5 YEARS AGO
Kouyou’s office is concerningly empty.
Every time Chuuya gets angry and storms out of their shared apartment, he always inevitably makes it back here. Dazai had gotten to the building early, scoured each and
every floor, before making it up here.
They don’t know where he is.
This fight felt… different, they’ll admit. It’s been a long time coming. Chuuya’s always disapproved of how Dazai treats his subordinates, and when Atsushi had come back last night half-dead, he’d snapped. Dazai hadn’t apologized, only defended their actions, and Chuuya had left in a huff. This is the first time they’re truly worried about fixing their relationship.
Their hands twist into knots in their lap. They really, really hope Chuuya will walk in any second now. They don’t even care if he’s angry. They just want him to be here .
The door swings open. They jump to their feet. Hirotsu stares at them, expression disgruntled. “Hirotsu,” Dazai calls. “Got a minute? There’s something I need to ask you.”
The man pauses in his walk, turning back to the young executive. “Please, don’t worry, Dazai-kun. I have all the time in the world. Not like I have a job to get to.” His expression doesn’t change. It’s hard to catch onto his sarcasm, but Dazai’s had years of practice.
“Have you seen the chibi this morning?” They ask. “I need his opinion on this report I’m writing.”
Hirotsu rolls his eyes. “Is that all? I’m surprised nobody told you. Chuuya-kun hopped on a plane last night. He’s in France, doing some negotiating on the Boss’s part. He’d always wanted to get involved with the French. Chuuya is the perfect person for the job.”
Chuuya’s… in France?
Dazai’s ears are ringing. They don’t know what to say.
“Thank you, Hirotsu. I’ll see you later,” they can hear themselves speaking, but they’re not really paying attention.
Chuuya has never gone on a trip without telling Dazai. Hell, they don't think Chuuya’s even been on a trip without Dazai. After all, they’re Soukoku. Double Black. Partners, now and forever. They work best as a team. It’s what Mori wants. It’s what they both want.
Or, is it? Chuuya clearly doesn’t seem to think so. If he just left without so much as a goodbye. They know they fought, that they were in the wrong, but still - they didn’t think things would end this way between them.
Dazai stands up, straightens their coat. Two can play at this game. If Chuuya doesn’t want to be partners with Dazai anymore, then -
Dazai can do the same.
THE ALLEYWAY ALTERCATION
“You been fighting my family, Atsushi?” Chuuya’s voice rings out, loud and clear. Dazai stops in their tracks.
Their plan had worked. Atsushi had lured Akutagawa in, who had in turn brought Chuuya. They’re not surprised. Their plans always work. They just, they think, wish this one hadn’t. Because now, they actually have to go through with this.
They actually have to talk to Chuuya.
They’re not killing him. Not now, not yet. They think Mori would agree with this decision. It’s a bit too early in the game to kill off such a major player. Kouyou would come for them, which would make everything just that much harder. Not to mention, the fact that Chuuya’s not an easy person to kill. They’re really going to think about how they’re going to do this.
Oh, but they’re doing this. There’s no doubt. Mori’s actually given them quite a nice excuse to break their one weak spot, to make them fully detached. Killing Chuuya is the perfect thing to prove they’ve let go. Chuuya let go four years ago. It’s about time Dazai did the same.
“...Chuuya-san?” Atsushi’s voice is scared, reverent, like he’s staring at a ghost. To the young mafioso, Dazai supposes he is. The two of them have always had a special bond. It makes them feel sick to their stomach. It’s time to intervene.
“Ah-ah-ah, stop right there, chibi.” They say airily, stepping out of the shadows and into the alleyway. “Has nobody ever told you that abandonment is bad? It leaves psychological scars, you know.”
They’re talking about Atsushi. Everybody here thinks they’re talking about Atsushi. But, they realise with growing horror, their words could relate to themselves, too.
Chuuya’s face makes the entire thing worth it. He goes pale, expression flickering between a thousand emotions. Dazai has their carefully crafted mask in place, one even Chuuya can’t see through. They have the upper hand here. They have the power.
“Dazai. What the fuck are you doing here? Finally got off your high horse and admitted that you’re just a useless asshole?” When he recovers, his words are harsh and biting. Dazai can instantly tell the difference between this and their teenage banter. That had been full of secret smiles and hidden laughter. This? This is just pure hatred.
Dazai hates it.
“Why, Chuuya! I’m simply helping a subordinate! I’m insulted that you think so lowly of me. Quite cruel, really.” A mock finger slides down their cheek, mimicking a tear. Chuuya’s seeing red in front of them. The words had just slipped out, a force of habit from a time long gone, but the tone hadn’t been an accident. Just as cruel and full as loathing as Chuuya’s had been.
“Well, maybe you should tell your subordinate to stop attacking Agency members. Leave them out of your sick grudge.” Chuuya says angrily. “Okay? If you want, we can settle this between you and me. But leave them out of it.”
Dazai wants to laugh.
There’s just no way Chuuya thinks that Dazai is the only one with a grudge. That’s ridiculous! Preposterous! He’s not the only one who left. As a matter of fact, they’re pretty sure Akiko is sharpening her blades this instant. Kouyou will be in a world of pain when she gets her hands on her. Not to mention the fact that Mori wants him dead. Even Atsushi must feel some anger towards his once friend, one of the only people who ever truly cared about him! Chuuya must be joking. There’s no other possibility.
“Oh, chibi! Do you truly think I’m the only one holding a grudge? That’s just the funniest thing I’ve heard all day! Why, there’s Akiko, Mori-san, even Atsushi-kun here! The Port Mafia wants the entire Armed Detective Agency obliterated, and there’s nothing that’s going to stop that from happening.” None of it is a lie. Mori has declared war. By the end of this, only one organization will be left standing. Either Dazai will finally achieve their dream of ending up six feet under, or they’ll finally crush their embarrassing attachment, once and for all. Either way, it’s a win-win.
They don't even spare Akutagawa and the blonde kid a glance. They’re just collateral. They don't even want to learn their full names.
“You’re not going to do it now, though.” Chuuya says quietly. “This is just a warning, isn’t it?”
Leave it to Chuuya to find out their plans. Dazai’s partially pleased they’re just as linked as they were four years ago, and partially angry.
“Bingo! See? Even stupid little slugs like you can come up with the right answer sometimes.” The nickname feels wrong in their mouth. Dazai wants to vomit.
Chuuya’s shoulders begin to shake, and his eyes are full of pure rage. “You can tell Mori-san to fuck off. The Agency won’t go down without a fight.”
“I don’t expect you to.” They say in return. “I’m quite looking forward to this. Exciting, isn’t it?”
Chuuya spits at his feet. “Shut up, asshat. Kenji, Akutagawa. We’re leaving.”
Dazai gives a little wave. “Bye-bye, chibi. See you later!” Watching him walk away angrily is, perhaps, one of the most painful things they’ve ever done. But they can’t think about Chuuya right now. Not while they have a war to win.
Only once they’re fully and properly gone does Dazai turn their attention back to their subordinates behind them. Atsushi’s got a hand wrapped protectively around Kyouka’s, who’s trembling with fright. The sight makes them smile. She’s a smart girl, knows who to listen to and who to disobey. She’ll go far in the Port Mafia, without a doubt.
Atsushi? They’re not too sure if he’ll even survive the next month. The boy is too scared to truly hurt Chuuya. They had seen part of the fight take place, and he had been pulling his punches against an Agency nobody - Akutagawa. It worries them.
This needs to go without a hitch. Dazai’s fate depends on it.