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It's the hardest road to follow (I'm thinking of you)
I really wish that I could call you (What can I do?)
You can find another me tomorrow
And that's the hardest pill to swallow, babe
The snow falls silently onto the ground.
The music from inside the reception hall is muffled behind the door. Every once in a while a couple of people could be seen through the windows laughing, dancing and generally having a good time. Everyone but one.
Minato strikes the match to light his cigarette.
Inhaling deeply, taking in the cold air.
One, two, three.
He exhales, watching the smoke float lazily up above his head before fading out of sight.
It’s peaceful out here.
Minato never really liked the quiet. He always needed to be surrounded by people, but in that moment he could see the upside of living uptown. Something his ex definitely would love to live in.
Time passes slowly. The animals in the forest quietly rummage around trying to find food for themselves. Wolves sing their songs to the moon shining brightly.
Midway through his smoke break, the door to the back opens, letting out the music, before drifting close silently, muffling the beat once more.
“I thought you gave that up for lent?” A sassy, deep sounding voice comes from behind.
Minato sighs and takes another puff of his cigarette, holding it in longer than before.
Please go away.
He thinks to himself.
“Today was stressful.” He replies, the smoke leaving his mouth as he talks.
Fugaku steps out further onto the patio.
“Why are you out here in the cold? Shouldn’t you be inside dancing with your....wife.” Minato didn’t mean to sound so bitter or to flinch when he said wife. Truly he didn’t. He just couldn’t help the resentment in his thoughts from seeping into his voice though.
“Careful Sunshine. One might think you’re jealous of her. Honestly, I wanted to make sure you weren’t out here drinking yourself stupid. Can’t have you dying on my wedding night.” He says with a soft smile trying to ease the tension.
I am still so in love with you.
Fugaku walks up to the railing Minato is leaning on and places himself directly beside him.
Minato turns his head to look at the young wonderful man beside him.
He looks good... no! He looks beautiful in his black suit and white tie.
Minato turns away quickly before his face can reveal his passionate and desperate thoughts.
Fugaku always said that his face gave everything away.
“Perhaps a few months ago I would be doing exactly that Fugaku, but I’m a clean man now. You know it and I know it. I don’t drink anymore.”
The ‘unfortunately’ goes unsaid...
Fugaku does nothing but hum in response.
“The wedding ceremony was beautiful,”
You were…are… beautiful.
“I can believe Mikoto talked you into having such an extra wedding. You never seemed the type.” Minato jokes, taking a side step closer to the man next him. Unable to keep himself out of the others' orbit.
“I’m really not, but she can be stubborn when she wants to be. We compromised. She got the wedding of her dreams, I got the honeymoon of my dreams. It all worked out.” Fugaku steps just a bit closer as well.
They stand in silence for a while, watching the snow fall from the sky. They stand there long enough for Minato’s cigarette to go out and for him to light another one.
“Fugaku....” Minato breaks the silence in an attempt to speak his mind but freezes when Fugaku looks in his direction and stares.
Fugaku turns, steps closer, officially invading Minato’s personal space, staring deeply into his eyes, gently placing his hand over his heart.
“Why don’t you call me your moon anymore?” He breathes out. His features take on a sad, exhausted look.
“I... um... I...” the words Minato wants to say won’t come out.
I love you.
I miss you.
Runaway with me.
Love me like you used to.
Don’t forget about me.
Don’t leave me.
You’ll always be my best friend.
She won’t love you like I do.
She doesn’t need you like I do.
I’m sorry...
They stare into each other’s eyes, lost in the moment, lost in each other: remembering all the good and bad times they’ve had together.
Their faces slowly come together until they are centimeters apart.
Minato places the hand not holding the cigarette on Fugaku’s cheek and slowly rubs his thumb up and down the stress lines of Fugaku’s face.
I want you.
I need you.
I can’t do this without you.
Minato places his forehead against Fugaku’s and breathes in the expensive cologne Mikoto must have made him wear.
“I think you should go back in, Fugaku. I’m sure Mikoto is wondering where her blushing groom went, plus your shivering. It’s freezing out here. Go inside and warm up. I’ll be in in a minute.” Minato smiles gently…convincingly at the gorgeous man beside him, kissing his forehead, smoothing his hand through the others long hair before backing away to lean against the railing once more.
Fugaku closes his eyes and sighs, Minato can’t help but think it’s a sigh of regret.
“Yeah ... yeah you’re right I should go in. My wife is probably looking for me, come inside with me? I’m not the only cold out here.”
“I’ll be there in a minute.” Another smile.
“If you say so old man.”
Fugaku gathers himself and heads to the door, opening it slightly.
“Go to hell, you’re the same age as me.”
Minato laughs only a little forcefully.
Fugaku does nothing but wink and laugh quietly as he walks inside, closing the door behind him with what seems like a loud thud, once again leaving Minato by himself. This time in more than one way.
The smile slowly drops off of Minato ’s face, a frown taking its place.
“I’m so, so sorry, Fugaku.”
Minato stands up straight, takes a puff of his cigarette and walks in the opposite direction of the house. He walks down the steps and takes a path leading into the cold forest, the snow muffling his footsteps.
He walks further from the house, further away from the love of his life until he is nothing but a silhouette in the darkness, the end of the burning cigarette the only light, until that too disappears.
If I woke up and I called it quits ('cause I'm thinking of you)
If today I gave up all of this (I don't know what to do)
Maybe I could get you back tomorrow
And that's the hardest pill to swallow, baby