Chapter Text
Zuko~Everything Has Changed
You’d been Zuko’s best friend for as long as you could remember. And, although the friendship hadn’t always been easy -the Prince had quite a famous temper- you couldn’t even imagine a world in which you weren’t friends. This is why the inner turmoil you were feeling inside was making you feel all the more guilty.
You had returned back to the Fire Nation when Zuko had reclaimed his honour by fighting the Avatar along with his sister, Azula. Since you didn’t side with the Avatar and the ‘traitor’ Iroh, you’d been welcomed back with open arms. However, it wasn’t quite the life you were expecting. You were still happy for Zuko! Of course- this is what he’d always wanted. In fact, you’d always supported Zuko in his journey to find the Avatar but something about this felt wrong. Especially since Aang had helped Zuko’s uncle, Iroh, to find and rescue Zuko from the caves under Ba Sing Sai.
So, now you were stuck in a very difficult position.
It had almost been a month since you and Zuko had returned to the Fire Nation, and yet you’d barely spoken a word to each other. Once, you had felt like he was the only soul in the universe that understood you completely… And, now? It felt like you didn’t even know him. He’d been far too busy celebrating the fact he was now recognised as the Crown Prince. You’d also noticed that he’d been spending more time with Mai- along with Azula and Ty Lee.
That didn’t sit right with you. As long as you live, you promised yourself you would never trust Azula. Where she was involved, it meant trouble. She was the type of person that always had an ulterior motive- even when there didn’t seem a need for one.
And, as for Ty Lee and Mai, you just saw them as Azula’s attack dogs. Not that she needed help fighting people, but you couldn’t exactly call them her friends. Azula didn’t have friends. That required her to care about other people. The only way she knew how to relate to people was through fear. Yet another reason you found to keep as far away from her as possible.
Zuko seemed to be doing the same to you. Maybe him and Azula were more alike than you thought.
You had gone down to the Royal Gardens for some peace. As much as the 'Hero’s Welcome’ was a good ego booster, it wasn’t good for the soul. And, right now you were doing some serious soul searching. You’d helped the Fire Nation. You’d fought the Avatar. You should feel good. Right? Except you didn’t, you felt awful. When Aang was shot down, all you could see was a child. A 12 year old kid who hadn’t chosen this role in the world. Who was just trying to survive. Who was trying to help the universe.
Sighing, you put your head in your hands. What had you done? What had Zuko done? You thought of Uncle Iroh… How you had betrayed him. You told yourself that you were doing it to survive, that you couldn’t survive a Fire Nation Prison, but the truth was that you were a coward. A coward who couldn’t do the right thing.
You hadn’t realised you had started crying until your tears had slipped down your cheeks. Quickly, you wiped them away. Crying was weakness.
Your attention was caught by a small turtle duck quacking loudly. He appeared to be suck in a weed within the pond, meaning he was separated from his family. You could sense his distress from where you sat. Gently, you moved to the little creature, and slowly removed the weeds from around the turtle duck. Hurriedly, he swam to his mother, who welcomed him immediately. You watched the family of ducks swim happily away. Together. Loved.
"Why can’t I just be like you, little turtle duck?“ you murmur to yourself, "You seem so happy. I wish I could feel like that again.”
It was only then you noticed how dark it had gotten. It was best to return to your room before the guards started asking questions- and 'suggesting’ you return to safety. Despite being welcome in the palace, it felt more like a prison.
What you hadn’t realised while you had been sat in the gardens, was that you hadn’t entirely been alone. Zuko had walked past the entrance to the caught yard and you had caught his eye. At first he saw a glimmer of his mother sitting by the pond. She had always loved animals, especially feeding the turtle ducks. But then his vision cleared and he had seen you. It made his heart sink. He hadn’t spoken to you in weeks. He didn’t entirely know why…
Zuko watched you disappear out of the garden and down the corridor… Away from him.
He hated to admit it but being back in the Fire Nation wasn’t bringing him the happiness he thought it would. His honour had technically been restored and yet he was feeling more ashamed than ever.
Part of him wanted to follow you; the other half knew he should visit Mai as he had promised earlier. The latter part of him won, but he couldn’t help but look back in your direction. As soon as he reached Mai’s room, he knocked softly.
"Hey, what took you so long?“ Mai asked, dragging him into the room, "I thought you’d never show up.”
"Ah,“ Zuko let out, "I didn’t- I just got caught up. That’s all.”
"Whatever,“ Mai smiled.
As much as Zuko wanted to enjoy his girlfriend’s company, you were still nagging on his mind. Even when Mai was speaking, he was still thinking back to you. How sad you looked. How guilty he felt about ignoring you. Mai started noticing how distant Zuko was being.
"Okay, what’s going on?”
"Nothing,“ Zuko said defensively.
"What’s with you? You don’t have to snap at me. I was just asking a question,” Mai replied, leaning away and folding her arms.
Zuko sighed.
“I’m sorry. I’m just tired,” he said, “I need to go. We’ll talk tomorrow.”
Mai attempted to reply but Zuko was gone.
—
You’d been inside your head for the past hour. It was as if everything was slowly coming together. You knew what you had to do now. It wouldn’t be easy- but when was the right thing to do ever easy? Some part of you broke knowing you’d have to leave Zuko behind but in the end you couldn’t let him control your destiny- not when he seemed to want no part in your future.
You began packing as quickly as you could. Throwing a few items of clothing into a bag as well as some medicine, basic hygiene products and a blanket. You didn’t know where you were going but you knew you had to get out.
Just as you finished packing, you heard a knocking at the door.
“Hello?” you reply after a moment of hesitation.
Zuko hesitated.
“Who’s there?” you replied, walking closer to the door.
With one hand you slowly began opening the door, with the other you had a small flame building. It never hurt to take a precaution when living in a place like the Fire Nation.
You fully opened the door and saw Zuko: you were stunned for a moment.
“Zuko?” you asked.
Gently, you let your hand drop, and the flame went out with it. You opened the door and walked back into your room, leaving it open to Zuko whether he was going to follow or not. He was surprised at your lack of response. He was expecting you to cry at him or yell at him, but there was nothing.
He followed you into your room and shut the door behind you.
“Don’t you want to know why I’m here?” Zuko asks.
“I don’t think it’s going to matter much longer,” you tell him, “I don’t think anything you’re about to say is going to matter much longer, Prince Zuko.”
“Prince Zuko?” he repeated, “You’ve never called me that. Not even when we were kids.”
“Yeah, well things have changed since then.”
“For the better!” Zuko insisted, “You’re telling me you preferred it when we were sailing in the frozen South Pole for weeks at a time than being a war hero in your own nation? You can’t be serious?”
"Maybe I did.“
"You can’t be serious! I- We were miserable!”
"Maybe you were! I wasn’t!“ you yelled at him, walking closer to him, "I had my best friend! I don’t even know who you are anymore! You haven’t spoken to me in weeks!”
"Y/N, I-“
”-No! Don’t Y/N me!“ you snapped at him, pressing a finer to his chest, "I was there for you. I never stopped believing in you. I never left your side. But, the moment you get back here, the moment you have your precious honour back, you forget I even exist!”
Zuko was silent.
"And, the saddest part is that I waited for you,“ you murmured, all your anger gone, "I waited. I thought maybe you’re just busy, off doing Prince stuff. But, then I saw you with Mai. Even Azula. And, I knew something had changed. I thought I was your friend; that we had a friendship that was unbreakable. But, now I see you were just using me as a replacement. As a place holder.”
"No,“ Zuko cried out, "That’s not true.”
You turned away, trying not to let him see your tears building.
"Then tell me why I feel this way. A stranger in my own nation. A prisoner in my own nation.“
"I’m sorry… I didn’t think-”
"-No you didn’t think.“
Zuko tried to reach out towards you. And, then he noticed your bag on your bed. It was full and there was items strewn around your room. Something was going on.
"Y/N, what are you doing? What do you mean it’s not going to matter anymore?”
“I’m leaving.”
"You can’t.“
"I have to.”
"You can’t leave me here, please,“ Zuko pleaded.
"You’ll be just fine,” you sadly smiled, “You haven’t needed me since you got back. I’m sure you won’t even notice I’m gone.”
“That’s not true!” Zuko argued.
"Then what is the truth?“
"The reason… The reason I couldn’t talk to you… Is because every time I looked at you I was remined of that day in Ba Sing Sei,” Zuko murmured, “I… I’ve realised I made the wrong decision that day. Looking at you just reminded me I didn’t need to be in the Fire Nation to be home. I just needed you.”
"Oh, Zuko.“
"I’m sorry,” he murmured, “I truly am. I’ll do anything to make it up to you. Anything.”
"Leave with me.“
"I want to leave,” Zuko promised, “But it needs to be the right time. The solstice.”
"I’ll wait,“ you agreed, "But promise me something.”
"Anything.“
"Promise me things will be different this time. I’m tired of fighting against the world’s last hope. I’m tired of not doing the right thing.”
"I know my destiny now. My uncle helped me see the light,“ Zuko said quietly, "I know what I must do now. I’m going to find the Avatar, and I’m going to help him defeat the Fire Lord.”
"Not 'I’. We. I’m coming with you.“
Zuko nodded at you. And, for the first time in what felt like forever he had hope.