Chapter Text
two ghosts----
Fear is impossibly pale- it drains you of warmth and color, of every thought you could ever smile too, and every foot tapping to good songs, and thats what her ghost looks like. She trails him, when the leaves go from spirited green to murky brown, she trails him. She hides behind pillars and forged memories always there, never in view. Peter lives with her memory, her ghost, and his own ghost.
Peter chases impossibles, impossible cures for his permanent impasse. He watched Gwen die, he watched the pale fear set in her bones and cheeks that would no longer blush, and fingers that would no longer feel. And yet he still looks. He looks for everywhere he went wrong, searching for the beginning of the butterfly or domino effect.
He looks for an end.
Someone offers it- a strange man with nice eyes that looks as though they've lived pink and purple sunsets. Peter has never met him, his name is Vraaj. And he has an offer.
The offer sits in his brain, 'I can take you back to a week before her death.' He should say yes, he could fix it all, or mess it up even more. He could die, the thought doesn't paralyze him the way Gwen's did. If he died, she'd live, and he wouldn't know, care, feel, or acknowledge. He'd be dead, and he wouldn't feel it.
To die for someone seems selfless, but Peter thinks it isn't. If you die, they're left to pick up your pieces. To mourn and drink lemon tea to fix their raw throat, to always remember and never erase. To listen to upbeat songs in hopes of not crying and fill up receipts with the thoughts you wanted to tell them at dinner. Those who survive live with your shell, they live with your regrets, they live with the energy you took from them.
To die is to fade. To live is to cry.
She could live, Gwen Stacy could live.
"I'll think about it," He says it even though the answer has been decided.
Andrew Garfield as Peter Parker
Emma Stone as Gwen Stacy and her Ghost
Jeenu Mahadevan as Vraaj Kulkarni
The Amazing Spider Man cast as Their Respective Characters
playlist;
two ghosts- by downinhollywood on spotify