Archive of Our Own ^beta

“We should have a baby.”

Katsuki sat up on the sofa where he’d been sprawled out, reading over the briefing from his latest mission. “I’m sorry, we fucking what now?”

“A baby,” Yo repeated simply, as if he was reciting some fact about the weather and not suggesting that they alter their entire lives for the next god-knew-how-many-years. “We should have a baby.”

Closing the file in his hands, Katsuki set it on the nearby coffee table and turned to face his husband of three years. “Isn’t the first step uh, a dog or some shit? When did we suddenly jump straight to brats? And why? I suck with kids.”

Yo’s lower lip jutted out in that infuriating pout he made whenever he was about to be particularly patronizing. “Aw babe, you do great with little Katsuki, and my cousin’s kid loves you.”

The mental images of a small girl with black braids clinging to his leg and a short, stocky toddler with sharp red eyes and bubblegum curls chewing on a Great Explosion Murder God Dynamite action figure flashed through Katsuki’s memory.

“That kid loves everyone. She’s got whatever genes make you such a people-loving idiot.” Katsuki rolled his eyes and leaned back into the side of the sofa. “And of course Kirishima’s kid likes me. I’m the reason he’s got such an awesome name. Also, he’s–”

“Don’t say ‘an idiot,’ you already said that one,” Yo pointed out.

“Stupid,” Katsuki finished, smirking at the unimpressed expression that came his way. “See, got cuts for days.”

Reaching in the pocket of his black slim fit jeans, Yo fished out his phone and began to scroll through numbers on the screen. “Fine. We’ll just see what your mom has to say about this.”

Eyes widened, Katsuki vaulted over the back of the sofa and followed his quickly-retreating husband into the kitchen. “Yo, don’t you fucking dare…”

“Mom! Hi!” The greeting dripped cloyingly from Yo’s lips in what Katsuki disdainfully referred to as his “fake-ass work” voice. “It’s your favorite son-in-law, just calling to check in. How are you?”

Katsuki glared at Yo, wrapping his fingers around the back of a nearby kitchen chair. If he was going to strangle something, better it be the unnecessarily expensive oak table set that Yo insisted on having than his traitorous little neck. Chair backing still firmly in hand, he swung his leg around to take a seat backwards on the chair.

“Oh, you know how Katsuki is…” Dark, dancing eyes stared straight at Katsuki as Yo continued to slander his good name to his mother. “Impossible.” A moment passed and Yo pulled the phone away from his face, his thumb tapping on the screen.

“What’s the little punk done now?” Mitsuki asked over loud chopping sounds in the background. “Masaru, it’s the boys. I’m gonna take this into my office. Yes, I’ll tell them you send your love.” The din from the kitchen drifted as Mitsuki made her way through the house. “Masaru says hello and that he loves you boys. Now, what is it that I can do for you, sweetheart? What has Katsuki done that’s so frustrating this time?”

Katsuki’s grip on the chair tightened. His free hand dragged across his face and pressed at his eyes. Why were they both like this? It was like they lived to make him miserable. And who in the hell was this woman Yo was talking to? Certainly not his mother. His mother didn’t “sweetheart” unless someone was dying. Sure, Katsuki felt like he was dying, but not “Mitsuki Bakugou sweetheart” dying.

“He doesn’t want to be parents,” Yo sighed.

No, scratch that. He was definitely dying, and he was taking that two-faced bastard with him.

“Big surprise there,” Mitsuki chuckled. “He’s shit with kids. Even when he was one himself, he was a terror to the other kids. Now he’s just a bigger terror.”

Clicking his tongue, Katsuki shot a middle finger in the direction of the phone. He might’ve been a monster as a kid, but he’d actually worked on his personal growth, thank you very much…unlike his mother, who was still playing the hits from “Now That’s What I Call Supportive Parenting: Fuck Katsuki’s Life edition.”

“Any suggestions?” Yo asked, ignoring the vulgar gesture being pointed in his direction. “I can’t help but think that we’re at the perfect point in our careers to start thinking about this kind of thing. Work’s finally starting to slow down –”

“Bullshit,” Katsuki interrupted. “You turned down three separate sponsorship offers this week because your schedule is already packed.”

“And I’m already so old…”

“You’re 28!”

“I just don’t know if I’ll ever be as ready to have children as I am now,” Yo finished, turning his back to Katsuki to grab a bottle of water from the fridge. “What I’m already starting to pass my prime?”

Katsuki shook his head and got up from his chair, having heard enough. “Jesus fuck, now you’re being ridiculous.”

“Let Yo have a baby, Brat.” Mitsuki’s rough scolding echoed from the phone in Yo’s outstretched hand. “It’ll be good for you, might mellow you out some. You’ll be too tired with the kid to be a pain in the ass to anyone else. Plus, it would be nice to be a grandmother before I’m dead.”

“You barely have crow’s feet, hag. Spare me the melodrama.” Katsuki tilted his head at Yo, his eyes pleading. There was no way he could be serious about this. “You sure you don’t just want to get a dog? Elbows volunteers at a shelter, he could probably hook you up.”

“Hanta,” Yo corrected.

“What?”

Covering his face with his free hand, Yo groaned. “Hanta, Katsuki. Your friend? Hanta Sero. You’ve been friends with these people for over a decade now, and the only one with naming privileges is Eijirou – usually when he’s not around.”

“First, every time I call Shitty Hair by his name and there isn’t a fight somewhere in the area, he gets all weepy and shit. Sometimes, even when there is a fight.” Katsuki shuddered as he recalled the last time he and Kirishima were on patrol and he thoughtlessly used the man’s given name. On the brink of losing an arm? Guy was as solid as his quirk. Second syllable into “Eijirou” and you would’ve thought Katsuki had told him he was dying. “Second, this is my point: you get mad at me for what I call my friends, but expect me to remember the name of some little gremlin I just met. Where does that make sense?”

“That’s pretty cute,” Yo hummed appreciatively. “Also, I’m going to tell them you called them your friends.”

“Don’t you dare.”

“I’d love to stick around for this little lover’s squabble, but this old married lady needs to get back into the kitchen to help the old man,” Mitsuki interrupted. “Katsuki, at least think it over. I know you’re bullheaded like me and don’t want to think of things until you want to, but this is something that should be discussed…well, earlier than this, but better now than never. Love you boys.”

“Thanks for the chat, Mom, we’ll be by for dinner sometime,” Yo said, ending the call and placing the phone back into his pocket.

“Well?” Katsuki shrugged his shoulders. “Happy now? You got to have your little joke and even got the old witch in on it. Can I go back to work now?”

Yo shot him a look of disbelief. “Katsuki, I was being serious. Do you really think I’d joke over something like this?”

Panic. There was no other word to describe the sudden and severe anxiety that rose inside of the hero as he waited for his partner to break face and admit that it was all a joke. No such moment came after several seconds that stretched into an awkwardly long time.

Katsuki Bakugou was known for being a lot of things: volatile, incendiary, insensitive, impatient…but he wasn’t one to panic, not even in the face of certain danger. If anyone had seen how locked up in fear he was, they would have assumed they were mistaken, or perhaps on hallucinogenics. He rubbed his damp palms against the legs of his jeans and accepted that okay, maybe Yo hadn’t been joking.

Still, what the hell? He hadn’t even shown a passing interest in children up to this point. In fact, nothing about Yo’s lifestyle was child-compatible. They lived in a sprawling condo full of expensive and fragile things that were highly susceptible to damage – Katsuki would know, he did so on his own on accident on what felt like a semi-regular basis. They wouldn’t just have to rearrange their work schedules; they’d have to redecorate their entire home.

“I dunno, Yo…” Katsuki finally admitted, scratching the back of his head. “You and I don’t know the first fucking thing about babies. It’s not like we can just drop what we’re doing in case anything happens.” He mimicked holding a phone. “Sorry, gotta drop this building on you and your family because my kid fell over at daycare and skinned his knee!”

“It wouldn’t be that bad,” Yo argued, folding his arms across his chest. “You’re not even going to consider this, are you?”

No, he absolutely was not. If anything, he’d already considered it too much, and within the few minutes he’d been frantically running through worst case scenarios faster than they ran through bandages, he’d already thought of a hundred things that could go wrong. Nope, a hundred-and-one; they already had a small hospital’s worth of bandages, and if they had a kid anything like either of them, they were going to need more cabinet space for the extra first aid supplies they’d have to hoard. Shit, why not just build a whole hospital wing off the nursery while they were at it.

And a nursery! Which of them would give up their office space to accommodate that? It sure as hell wouldn’t be Katsuki, since this wasn’t his idea, but then Yo would inevitably turn his office into their shared office, which would be an inconvenience onto itself. Yo Shindou might’ve been immaculate in grooming, but his office was anything but. Katsuki could go up to his office at any time of the day and find a case file within minutes. Yo couldn’t find his car keys half of the time unless they made it into the catch-all in the genkan.

Seriously, what was he even thinking?

“I can see it all over your face. Why do I even try? I should have known you were just going to shut me down.” Yo threw his hands up in frustration and stalked over to the steel staircase that led up to the second level of their condo.

Katsuki followed hot on his heels. “I’m not ‘shutting you down,’ I’m just doing the thinking that you clearly haven’t.”

“I have thought about it, Katsuki. Do we really want to live out our lives and have nothing but an empty house full of stuff we don’t even need to show for it?”

Ah, there it was. “Are you going through a midlife crisis or some shit?”

Yo made a sharp right into their bedroom and flopped onto the bed. “No, Katsuki. And no, I’m not in a rut. Nothing happened at work. I just…there has to be something there. Something else. Is this really all there is?”

Taking a seat next to his lover, Katsuki watched the subtle lines that appeared on Yo’s face whenever he was particularly distressed about something. Shit, it was one of those, then. The year prior, Yo had a close call while on a mission. It only resulted in relatively minor injuries that sidelined the tremor-controlling hero for a couple months, but it could have easily been much worse.

A matter of a few inches. Less than the space that separated the couple now. That’s all it would have taken for the train cart sailing past Yo to hit him full-on, which would have likely pinned him into the concrete wall not twenty feet from him. Instead, he walked away with a broken arm, having been able to pivot just enough for it to pass him. Thankfully it was a clean break and the surgery was fairly simple.

Eyeing the thin scar that spanned the underside of his husband’s arm, Katsuki was reminded that wasn’t the only thing that had come home broken. At that point in their careers, the hero Dynamite had faced death enough times to be on a first-name basis, but Grand? He was most effective at a distance, which meant he was seldom in the direct line of fire. Though empathy wasn’t exactly his strong suit, Katsuki remembered the first time he thought he was going to die and how much he’d pulled away from people at the time, so he patiently waited for Yo to be okay with talking about it. While the agency was pushing for Yo to go to therapy, Katsuki was pushing back. Much like a broken bone, you couldn’t make Yo heal just by forcing him back together. It took time and constant care.

Once the brunette did finally start going to therapy and showed signs of returning to his old pain-in-the-ass ways, Katsuki thought that was the end to it. Unfortunately, healing a person’s psyche wasn’t as linear as healing the body, and Yo came out of the situation with some new philosophies that would pop up out of nowhere on occasion.

Like the one they were currently navigating right now. In Katsuki’s experience with these thus far, his best option was to humor Yo and support him however he could.

Even if that meant he would have to do some very stupid shit.

“What if we…shit, I don’t know…borrowed one of the brats for a weekend, like a trial run?” he asked, regretting the words even as they were leaving his mouth.

Dark eyes slid over to look at Katsuki, an arched brow raising curiously. “You mean that?”

“When have you known me to say shit I don’t mean?” the blonde challenged. “We’ve got a free weekend coming up; see if your cousin wants to offload the kid for a couple days. I’d ask Kirishima, but I don’t want Pinky calling every hour to make sure I haven’t killed the little shit.”

Yo sat up slowly, keeping eye contact in case, what, Katsuki made a run for the door? The idea was out there; there was no taking it back. A tiny smile formed on Yo’s face and his features instantly softened.

“Okay. Okay. I’ll uh, call Yori and see if she’d be okay with us borrowing Michi for the weekend.” He hopped up and pulled his phone back out of his pocket. “I’m sure it’ll be okay unless they have something planned already. She could probably use a break.”

“I’m still waiting for you to tell me she’s actually your damn twin. Even your names are similar,” Katsuki mused.

“Almost!” Yo laughed. “Just a few weeks apart. Yori’s older, but I’m the better-looking one, obviously. Oh, if we were thinking adoption, it would be nice if we were paired with a child around Michi’s age. Older kids are often harder to place in homes, and that way, you wouldn’t have to worry about taking care of an actual baby.”

“Don’t get shit out of order. Haven’t even gotten past the trial version yet and you’re already ordering a lifetime subscription.”

Swiping to his cousin’s number on his phone, Yo tapped the call icon and began exiting the room. “Just wait and see, babe. You might like it so much, you’ll be buying strollers and setting up play dates yourself. You’re going to make a very hot dad.”

Katsuki exhaled through pursed lips. “Yeah, we’ll see about that. Hopefully we’ll have a place left to put that shit in when this is all over.”

🧡👶🖤

The big “trial parenting” weekend came quickly – a little too soon for Katsuki’s comfort, but who was counting?

Okay, yes, he’d been counting, but only because he’d only had a few weeks to properly prepare. Yo thought he was overreacting when he started fortifying the condo.

“This place could stand both of our quirks if needed.”

Yeah, but it wasn’t prepared for little knees smacking into sharp table corners or what might happen if there was an applesauce shortage. Katsuki was nothing if not fully prepared for whatever might come up. He never half-assed anything in his life, and he wasn’t about to start now. He spent an entire evening grilling Kirishima on every little mishap little Katsuki had experienced in his brief few years of life.

He’d purchased Hello Kitty band-aids and child-sized ice packs, stuck small spongy safety cushions to anything that had even a semi-sharp edge, and secured a prioritized list of emergency contacts to the fully-stocked fridge that contained everything he might need to feed the little monster. Their gear was locked up in the secure hidden safe in his office so he didn’t have to worry about Michi accidentally blowing her hand off playing with one of his grenadier bracers.

If there was anything left to be done, he couldn’t think of it. Of course, that didn’t stop him from driving himself insane trying.

He sat on the edge of one of the chairs in their living room, his knee bouncing incessantly. Yo reached over and stilled the knee with his hand.

“Whoa babe, calm down. I just spent the last five minutes wondering whether I was starting to experience some involuntary trembling. Save the house shaking for after this weekend?” A playful smirk danced along Yo’s lips in a clear attempt to distract Katsuki from the very apparent near-meltdown he was definitely not having.

“What if she chokes on something?”

The familiar-but-still-infuriating look that said Katsuki was “too cute for words” settled into Yo’s features. “She won’t. We moved anything that could be a choking hazard. Also, she’s five. I think she’s past that stage already.”

“Well what if–”

Katsuki’s protest was cut off by his husband’s lips pressed over his. A bright grin broke out over Yo’s knowing face when he pulled back.

“Have I told you how sexy it is that you’re so worried about this?” he asked.

Heat rolled in Katsuki’s gut as he looked up and down the length of his partner’s body. “No, but I’d allow an explanation, if you’ve got the time. When’s your cousin s’posed to get here again?”

Like a punchline to another joke of the universe – and most things in his life, honestly – the chiming of the doorbell echoed from the entryway.

“Now?” Yo whispered, the hint of an apology hanging on the end of his question. He bowed his head on Katsuki’s shoulder. “Owe you one?”

“Yep,” Katsuki snipped, pushing Yo away and briskly walking back to the bathroom to splash some cold water on his face to deal with his sudden problem. Fuck that man and his miserable fucking timing. He trudged back out to find Yo talking animatedly to a woman who was, by all accounts, his mirror image in female form. Yori was, like Yo, model-level gorgeous with an award-winning smile that could win over even some of the most difficult people.

Unfortunately, like Yo, she also knew this and used it to her advantage at every given opportunity, which made the two of them together a giant headache for Katsuki.

“Katsuki, hey! Come over and say hello, you anti-social babe. It’s been forever; too busy saving the world to visit, I’m assuming?” Yori combed a hand through the soft waves of her shag haircut, pushing her hair away from her face.

Did that ever work for anyone? Katsuki always thought Yo was a bit of a tool when he did it, and it just made Yori look like she was trying too hard. Why’d he marry into this family again?

From behind his cousin, Yo gave another apologetic smile, his face splitting into a lopsided, sympathetic grin. Katsuki’s traitorous heart jumped in response.

Oh yeah, that’s why.

“Hi Yori,” Katsuki greeted, his hand half-raised in a lazy wave. No sense in encouraging the woman if he could help it.

“Still so shy.” Yori shook her head. “We’ll drag you out of it eventually, won’t we, Michi?” She looked down at the wide-eyed child latched firmly to Yo’s side, who leaned around her mother to look at Katsuki warily. Her dark little eyes honed in on him, narrowing with the kind of suspicion seldom seen in children her age.

Good. Little shit should know the pecking order. Katsuki might be anxious about making sure she was well-taken care of, but he wasn’t about to let her flip over the whole house over it. He’d establish dominance, she would be well-behaved, and she’d get some apple bunnies or something for her trouble. Seemed like a good exchange to him.

“No, he can stay over there.”

Yo and Yori looked down at Michi in surprise. Prying the girl from his waist, Yo knelt down until he was eye-level with her.

“That wasn’t nice, Michi. You should apologize.”

The stubborn child shook her head fervently. “No. He’s scary. He’s loud and yells a lot and his arms go POW-POW-POW. I saw it on TV.” She threw her arms about for emphasis.

Yori laughed as Yo shot he a questioning look. “Michi’s really into heroes right now…like really into them. ‘Can’t keep her from launching off the furniture’ levels of obsessed. I’ve tried keeping all of that off of the television and limiting her media hours, but you know how kids are. Sometimes it’s all I can do to get her to sit still while I get ready for work in the morning.”

“No surprise there. Were we any different as kids?” Yo asked, smirking.

“We were not.” Yori ruffled her daughter’s hair. “Thanks again for taking care of her. It’s been a minute since I’ve been able to get away.”

“No problem, happy to have her. Anything we should know before you head off?” Yo whispered something in Michi’s ear and she took off in a sprint toward the kitchen.

“Michi, we walk while we’re inside,” Yori hollered after the speedily retreating child. “Sorry, she’s got energy to spare, I swear. She usually goes to bed between 8 and 9 on the weekends. No scary movies, obviously. She’ll try it, but don’t let her. It never ends well.” She pointed to the purple, star-printed bag sitting on the floor nearby. “She has all of her clothes and toiletries in there, as well as her blanket and her plush. Wish I could get her to stop dragging those around, but at least we were able to trade up this year so they’re not old and ratty.”

“Seems easy enough,” Yo hummed, idly taking notes in his phone. “No allergies, medicine, anything?”

“Nope,” Yori answered. “Oh, she’s started this habit of playing hide-and-seek without letting you know first. I’ve found telling her the game is over and she wins will get her to come out, but you might have to roam around and call for her first, so she feels like you’re ‘trying.’ Stubborn child wants to win all the time, but doesn’t want it handed to her. Impossible.”

Yo looked at Katsuki out of the corner of his eye and chuckled. “Yeah, I know the feeling.”

“Piss off,” Katsuki hissed, noting the way Yori flinched in response.

“Yeah, and she’s a repeater, so could you be careful?” she asked. “Far be it for me to tell you how to live in your own home, but I’d appreciate it if I didn’t get notes from school for the next couple of months because Michi learned a few choice words.”

“I’m sure we can manage to keep it clean for 36 hours.” Yo raised his eyebrows at his spouse and planted his hands on his hips, looking every bit the disapproving mother. “Isn’t that right, Katsuki?”

Rolling his eyes, Katsuki heaved a sigh of resignation. “Sure. No problem.”

Yori beamed at them and hiked her purse higher up onto her shoulder. “Well, I’m getting out of here while she’s preoccupied. She has an easier time if she doesn’t actually see me leaving. I’ll see you boys tomorrow.” She winked at Katsuki. “Don’t have too much fun, fellas, or you might want one of your own.”

“Fat chance,” Katsuki grumbled. After all, that was the point, to prove to Yo that they would be absolute garbage parents and that the idea was terrible. As long as the girl was alive at the end of the visit, he considered his work done.

Once Yori had left, Yo turned back to Katsuki with an exasperated expression.

“Are you actually going to try, or am I doing this solo?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow in challenge.

“Oh, I’m gonna try,” Katsuki huffed back. “How else am I getting you to drop this if you don’t feel like I’ve given it my best? You joke the kid’s like me, but if anything, she’s your little clone. Now, are you gonna keep riding my ass?”

“That’s a swear,” came a small voice from around the corner, followed by a loud sucking sound. “Momma says you’re not supposed to swear. Only ignorant people with bad parents use swears.”

Katsuki turned to face Michi, who was leaning against the wall, lips wrapped around the straw of the juice box in her hand.

Did that sassy little shit just accuse Katsuki Bakugou of being stupid? So much for him being “scary.” Either that, or she’d been lying. With the Shindou genes, it was hard to tell.

“Big words for someone with such short legs. Anything else your mom tell you we should know about?” Katsuki asked, jutting his chin out defiantly.

Another loud slurp rattled out as the small girl drained the last of the plastic package. She smacked her lips dramatically and a small, satisfied smile crept across her face. “She said bullies like to make their bodies bigger because their brains are small and it makes them feel bad.”

“Michi,” Yo warned, covering his mouth to conceal his amusement. “That really isn’t nice. You should apologize.”

“You want me to lie, Uncle Yo?” Michi asked, her round, dark eyes widened in disbelief.

“Carbon. Copy,” Katsuki uttered, shaking his head and going back into the living room.

Yo opened his mouth like was about to protest, but he was cut off by the ringing of his phone. Katsuki whipped around, knowing damn well that ringtone only went off when the hero was being contacted by his agency. Wincing at the number on the screen, he tapped the phone icon on the screen and slowly held the device to his ear.

“Grand here…uh huh…” His head turned to Katsuki, his mouth pulled tight into a frown. “Uh, I was off duty today, are you sure you can’t get someone else? Bridge collapse? Ah. Um, let me just…can I call you back in five?” Throwing his head back, Yo headed towards the stairs, the metal steps banging under his heavy footfall as he ascended. “I mean, how much help do you think I’ll really be with a building that’s already on fire? No, no, I understand. I’ll make it three. Yep, already grabbing my gear.”

A few seconds of tension passed as Katsuki watched Yo disappear behind the door to the office, shutting it quietly behind him. Muffled shouts curses were barely audible, but the tone indicated that his attempts to appeal to his employers had not gone successfully. Moments later, Yo reappeared downstairs, gear bag slung over his shoulder.

“I’m really sorry, Kat. I gotta go,” he murmured, head hanging low. “I’ll try to be back in a few hours, promise.”

Michi ran up to Yo, her tiny hands clutching the hem of his shirt. “Do you have to, Uncle Yo? I don’t want you to leave.”

Yo crouched, planting a kiss on the small girl’s forehead. “Sorry, Mich, Uncle needs to go to work. There are people that need saving. I wouldn’t if they didn’t need me. Please be good for Uncle Katsuki while I’m gone. He’ll take really good care of you.”

“I can go instead, if–” Katsuki’s offer was cut off by a wave of Yo’s hand.

“No, don’t worry about it. Your agency is clearly staffed sufficiently, whereas mine likes to use all of its resources in questionable ways.” The muscles in the tremor-yielding hero’s face flexed as he clenched his jaw. “My contract’s coming up, so this will be a good point to bring up when asked whether I feel I’ve ‘earned my raise’ this year.” Brushing a quick kiss to Katsuki’s cheek, he headed for the door.

“Make sure you cover your ass, okay?” Katsuki called after him. “Don’t get distracted and do some fuck-stupid stunt, you hear me?”

“Promises,” Yo called back. The click of the door closing behind him echoed loudly in the open space.

Katsuki glanced down at the child who was standing there, still staring down the hall. Her lower lip wobbled, large tears threatening to spring from her large brown eyes. He dragged a rough palm across his face. There was no fucking way, after all the whining and doe-eyes and insistence that they’d be tackling this together. He knew he couldn’t be angry at the man – work was work – but this was exactly the shit he’d been worried about. What if his agency did call him? What was he gonna do with the brat, take her to the agency and have one of the paper-pushing idiots watch her? They couldn’t find their own asses half of the time.

A loud, wet sniffle drew his attention back to the matter at hand. Like it or not, he was the main caretaker at the moment, so he should probably…care-take or something… How hard could it really be, anyway? His parents had managed to raise him without fucking it up too bad; he could handle this.

Now, what would the hag say at a time like this…

“You gonna be all right, brat?” Katsuki asked, crouching down in the same fashion Yo had. Clearly there was something to the whole eye-contact shit. After all, kids were just smaller adults, and Katsuki always hated being looked down on, so that shit made sense, at least.

“M’fine,” Michi sniffed. She wiped at her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater, but it seemed to be futile, as the tears kept falling. This only made her bring both her arms to her face, tiny squeaks and hiccups escaping the cave she’d created for herself.

Fuck if that wasn’t relatable.

“You wanna watch some TV or something?” Katsuki offered. “Your mom said you really liked hero sh…tuff. We don’t have much, but we do have some hero vids.”

Michi peeked out through her sleeve-shield. “Yeah?”

There, now they were getting somewhere. If she was a little nerd for heroes, Katsuki could work with that. He was suddenly glad all of his friends insisted on sending him free merchandise anytime something new came out, and doubly glad that Yo hadn’t let him throw it away or donate it.

“Yeah, got a pretty good catalog, actually.” He stood and walked over to a tall mahogany bookcase that held all of the videos they’d accumulated over the years. He glanced over at the girl, who was watching him with rapt attention. “Got any favorites? If you don’t know, we could just watch something of Yo’s–”

“Deku!” Michi chirped happily.

Of fucking course. Why wouldn’t the universe lean into what was quickly becoming his personal hell? His brain scrambled to find something, anything that would be considered passable. If this girl was anything like he – and fuck, even her precious Deku – was at that age, no other hero was gonna cut it. For them at that age, it was All Might or nothing.

Thick blonde eyebrows shot up in realization. The agency Deku started and named after All Might, didn’t someone work there? Shit, which of them was it… He rifled through different plastic boxes, turning each of them over to look at the agency branding at the bottom. Finally, his eyes rested on the logo that looked like the letters A and M, with the tops of the “M” shooting up like the prongs of All Might’s signature hair.

“Chargebolt: Charging Into Action, huh? Well, it sounds fucking lame, but it’s better than nothing,” he muttered, grabbing the disc from the shelf and popping it into the player. Even if she didn’t get as much of her favorite as she wanted, Michi was bound to find something funny. Kaminari was a walking gag reel.

The screen lit up and Michi crawled onto the sofa, her legs swinging over the edge. Her broad smile of anticipation dimmed significantly when the menu popped up.

“Uncle Katsuki, I know I’m not an adult, but I wasn’t actually born yesterday.” Her eyes rolled back into her head dramatically as she flopped over into the cushions. “This guy isn’t Deku; he’s a clown!”

Katsuki’s shoulders seized with a restrained laugh. Well, he couldn’t be mad; the kid definitely wasn’t wrong. Still, it just proved that his work wasn’t as cut-out as he initially thought.

“This clown works with Deku, so he’ll probably be on some of the footage,” he pointed out, flipping through the scene selection portion of the menu. “Better than nothing.”

“You don’t have any Deku videos? He’s the top hero in Japan!” Michi groaned, throwing her hands up in frustration.

“First of all, short stack I’m the top hero in Japan, so let’s get that straight,” Katsuki said, jabbing a crooked finger in the child’s direction. “Secondly, if Deku was so great, he would have been able to take care of whatever bullshit assignment Yo’s agency called him for.”

“If you're so great, why didn’t your agency call you? Huh?” Michi bit back. Her small eyes narrowed into slits and her chin jut out defiantly. She looked so much like Yo in that moment that Katsuki didn’t know whether to laugh or shake some sense into her.

Was this what their kid would end up like? The thought rose uninvited in the back of Katsuki’s mind, holding him hostage until he yielded and considered it. A smaller version of Yo with Katsuki’s sensibilities – or better, a smaller version of Katsuki with a variance of his quirk but Yo’s social acumen? For the briefest of moments, Katsuki understood a fraction of what drove IcyHot’s egomaniac of a paternal unit to make some of the choices he did.

However, Katsuki was definitely not Enji Todoroki, and thank fuck for that. While it was a fun thought exercise, it didn’t take a genius to recognize that child would be an absolute terror. If they managed to get that kid to adulthood, it would be a miracle.

“Hey, can I have a fuckin’ juice box?” Michi tugged on the hem of his shirt insistently, her tiny face screwed up in determination, like she’d been trying to get his attention for a while.

“Hah? Sure, fine.” Katsuki shook his head, swatting her hand away. “Sit down and watch your movie. I’ll go get you one.” He was halfway to the kitchen before the question fully registered, causing him to pivot on his heel and look back at the small girl situating herself back onto the sofa. “Oi, watch your mouth. Whatever happened to ‘swearing is for idiots’ or whatever?”

Michi shrugged nonchalantly. “You weren’t listening. I tried to ask nicely, but it didn’t work.”

“Yeah, well…don’t. And don’t make it a habit, because your mother will wring my neck.” He turned back around and strode into the kitchen. Opening the fridge, he heaved a sigh and rolled his shoulders. How was he already getting tired? He’d been watching the little brat for less than an hour and he was ready for a nap. Did kids that age take naps? Maybe he could put in one of Yo’s old black-and-white movies he liked for some weird fucking reason and bore the kid into a nap. Most of those were light on the ‘adult’ content, so there was little chance she’d learn anything else that would cause Yori to string Katsuki’s ass out for corrupting her young child.

His eyes skimmed the various juice containers that lined the bottom shelf. Which did she even want? Peach? Strawberry? Apple? He’d been so caught up in Michi turning into a tiny mimic that he hadn’t even thought to ask. Did she have any food allergies? He was pretty sure Yo had asked, but hell if he could remember what Yori had said. Yo took notes, right? Where did he leave those? Katsuki turned around in the kitchen, shutting the fridge to see if perhaps the notes had been attached to the fridge. Nope. Maybe they were up in his office?

Fuck it; he’d just ask the kid what she wanted. It was unlikely she’d ask for something that made her sick.

“What kind of juice you want, brat?” Katsuki called out, half-expecting another snarky quip from the little girl. He paused, listening for a reply, but none came. “Oi, Michi…you ignoring me now?”

Nothing.

Katsuki made his way out to the living room, thinking maybe the girl did fall asleep after all. He was concerned to find the sofa unoccupied, with no sign as to where the child had gone.

“Michi?” Katsuki looked behind the sofa. No kid there. “Hey, quit messing around.” He checked the bathroom to see if perhaps she’d needed to go, but she wasn’t there either.

Shit. Shit shit shit. Where in the hell had she gotten off to? His eyes widened in alarm as he considered the upstairs. Did Yo lock his office after he left? He’d gone in a hurry; maybe he’d forgotten. That whole room was an absolute disaster. Who knew what kind of things she could get into. If he thought Yori would be mad over her kid learning the f-bomb, how would she feel if the kid lost a hand to an actual explosive?

His heavy footfall against the metal steps echoed throughout the apartment as he ascended, skipping every other step until he reached the top landing. He all-but-ran down the hallway to Yo’s office, only somewhat relieved to find the door was closed. He tried the handle – the door was locked. That was either very good, or very bad. Did kids know how to lock doors? Pressing an ear against the door, Katsuki listened as hard as he could to see if he could tell whether there were signs of anyone inside.

Nothing. Silence. Not even the slightest knock or shuffle. He let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. At the very least, she probably wasn’t in any of the rooms that could end in complete disaster. He knew for a fact his own office was locked up, and if Michi had tried to press any of the numbers on the security keypad, he would have heard it by now.

Where else could she be?

Katsuki started with the back-most room of the condo, looking in every closet and cupboard, behind every curtain and bookcase, but he came up empty. After nearly thirty minutes of searching, anxiety started to creep in. Each thought he had was worse than the one before.

What if she went outside? No, he would have heard if the door opened; that damn door was so loud, he could hear anytime Yo came and went from any point in the condo.

What if a villain took her? It wasn’t out of the realm for someone to find where they lived. Security was tight, but if someone had the right quirk, all they had to do was sneak in and Michi would be a prime weakness to exploit.

“See, this is exactly what I’d been worried about, but no, Yo has to push. He’s always fucking pushing, never listening to anything I have to fucking say…” Katsuki rambled on as he made his way back downstairs to look at the emergency contact list on the fridge. He’d have to call Yori and let her know that he’d somehow managed to misplace her only child. God, she was going to be pissed.

Yo? Yo was going to freak out, for certain. He’d blame Katsuki for sabotaging it on purpose, like he’d be so petty as to risk the safety of a child to make a point. As if he even needed to.

Just as he went to call Yori, his phone lit up with a picture of Kaminari, the electric hero’s face squished together as he pressed it against a window. He had one of the idiots take it and set it as Katsuki’s contact photo for him.

“Now I look like I’m trapped inside your phone!” The fucking idiot.

Katsuki considered letting it go to voicemail, but an idea occurred to him. Denki basically had the mind of a child himself; maybe he’d have some insight on where a kid might go. He swiped his thumb across the screen to accept the call.

“Yo, Bakubuddy! How’s it going on the babysitting front?”

Leave it to Pikachu to irritate him in the first three seconds of the call. Granted, Katsuki was already agitated, but even if he wasn’t, the chipper tone that emanated from the phone would’ve done it.

“What d’ya want, Sparky? Kinda busy,” he huffed impatiently.

“Aw come on, don’t be like that, man,” Denki whined pathetically. “We’re in the same boat today, so I thought I’d check in on you. Eijirou and Mina went out on a lunch date, so I’m watching ‘Lil Kat for the afternoon.” A high-pitched growl-like yell rang out in the background. “Yeah, little dude, you’re a monster! Maybe Mom and Dad will make you a brother or sister soon. That’d be pretty cool, right?”

“Don’t be talking to the kid about shit like that.” Katsuki’s nose wrinkled in disgust.

“Ah, he’s still a little guy. He doesn’t understand anything yet,” Denki said dismissively. “How are things on your end? You’re watching Yo’s cousin, right? I bet you two are besties by now.”

If by “besties” he meant “testing his patience like the rest of his friends” then yeah. Best. Friends. Ever.

“Yeah, it’s going great. Currently getting my ass handed to me in hide-and-seek,” Katsuki admitted, leaning on his elbows against the kitchen counter. “Either the damn kid is in the floorboards or she found a part of the condo we’re not aware of yet.”

“Kids are tricky,” Denki agreed. His tone was unusually serious. If Katsuki didn’t know any better, he’d think his old classmate was a responsible adult and not the most likely of his classmates to feed the kid a dinner of fish crackers and sour plums out of a jar.

Then again, he hadn’t somehow managed to misplace a whole-ass child, so maybe Katsuki was the one who still needed to grow.

“Have you tried looking under the beds?” Denki suggested.

“Yeah, and up into the frame.” Twice. Katsuki rubbed his eyes, feeling the exhaustion seep deeper into his muscles.

“Behind the curtains?”

“Yes.”

“The back of the closets?” Denki asked. “Katsuki, no, get that out of your mouth. Sorry, not you, Katsuki, the little one. I think he might be cutting another tooth, because there is drool everywhere.”

“Yeah, Sparky,” Katsuki snapped, his patience finally run out. Bringing it up was clearly a mistake. This fucking idiot couldn’t even handle hiding in their combat drills at school; how in the hell did Katsuki think he would be able to –

“You look in the hamper?”

What? Katsuki blinked, uncertain if he’d heard that correctly. “The hamper?”

Denki snorted in amusement. “Yeah, the hamper,” he said matter-of-factually. “I used to love hanging out in there to hide from my older sisters. It’s pretty comfy, actually. If I thought I’d fit in there now, I’d probably still try it. You never think you need a hiding space until leg day creeps up on you.”

Katsuki clicked his tongue derisively. “As if you do anything on leg day anyway.”

“Yeah, well, if I could hide in a hamper, you can bet I’d do a whole lot less,” Denki said with a chuckle. “Anyway, gotta go feed Mini Kat before he finds something else to shove in his mouth. Kirishima doesn’t seem that worried about it, but those teeth are looking pretty pointy, so maybe it’s because the munchkin can handle it. Text me and let me know how your game pans out. It’s rare you lose at anything. Do you think it’s a thing to do with losing to Shindous, or–”

“Nope.” Katsuki tapped the button to hang up the call. That was enough of that. Little shit thought he was pretty funny, huh? They’d just have to see how funny he was when it came time for them to hit the gym again. If he thought he hated leg day before, well…

Still, that didn’t take away from the fact that he definitely had a point. Katsuki didn’t even think to check the hamper. He’d looked in the washer and the dryer, but for some reason it never occurred to him that she’d climb into a basket full of dirty clothes. It probably smelled like sweat and entirely too much cologne.

Ah shit, but it was Yo’s cologne. Maybe Michi wouldn’t have minded as much. Katsuki stalked back to the little nook they’d renovated to serve as a laundry area and lifted the weaved wicker lid from the hamper. Sure enough, there she was, curled up on herself. He tapped the side of the hamper, but the child didn’t so much as stir. Katsuki bent over and tapped the end of her nose, relief washing over him when it scrunched up reflexively.

The relief was quickly replaced by irritation, and it took everything Katsuki had to not push the hamper over with his foot. Sure, it would have been a rude awakening and a terrible thing to do to a child, but the little monster had basically shaved a few years off his life, so she deserved it.

“Michi,” he said, surprised at the strain in his voice. The girl huffed a small sigh, but remained asleep. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Oi. Michi.”

Her thick, dark lashes fluttered as Michi stirred to consciousness. She tilted her head up slightly to look at Katsuki, who was glaring down at her.

“Mmm…you’re slow, Uncle Katsuki.”

“I’m gonna slowly beat that ass if you don’t get out of the hamper,” Katsuki answered dryly, folding his arms across his chest.

Michi extended her thin arms upward, her limbs trembling gently as she stretched and groaned.

“Help?” she asked, wiggling her tiny fingers in his direction.

Katsuki scoffed. “You stuck, shorty? Serves you right. Dunno why I shouldn’t just leave you here until your mom comes back tomorrow.”

Michi’s lower lip stuck out, her tiny face pinched together in distress. A high-pitched whine clawed from the back of her throat, piercing Katsuki’s ears. He’d never so desperately wished his hearing was worse than it already was.

“Oh my god, fine! Just stop that noise. I’ll get you out of the damn basket.” He reached down and pulled the child free, holding her aloft in the air. Her thin legs dangled as she swung them around.

“Down?”

“Nah.” Katsuki held her farther out so she couldn’t kick him as easily. “What did we learn from all of this, huh?”

The girl glared at him, once again reminding him of his husband in an almost eerie way. “Was there a lesson?”

Ohoho yeah... This kid was definitely a Shindou.

“Guess you’re going back in the basket then.” Katsuki tucked the girl under his arm and started to lower her into the basket face-first, grinning at the shrieks the motion elicited.

“No! Nonono, I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” she wailed. “I won’t do it again. I promise!”

“Yeah? And what do we say when we want people to do shit for us?”

“Please!”

“And?”

“Thank you!”

Katsuki placed Michi on the ground gently, flicking the end of her nose and laughing as she recoiled. “Good girl. Now go sit in the living room and stay there.”

Michi opened her mouth as if to protest, but was cut off by the sound of the front door opening. Both stubborn combatants turned their attention to the noise.

“Hello? Kat, Michi? You home?” Yo called from the entry way.

“Uncle Yo!” Michi took off toward the front door. Katsuki followed suit, rounding the corner just in time to see Yo motion the girl to stay back.

“Sorry hun, Uncle Yo’s a bit of a mess right now. Super dirty, ew ick.” Yo stuck out his tongue and made a face, earning him a giggle. He glanced up at Katsuki and frowned.

It was then that Katsuki noticed Yo was thoroughly covered in dirt and favoring a spot on his side that was considerably darker than the rest of his soiled hero costume. He’d added a protective bodysuit made of a Kevlar weave beneath his traditional costume after Katsuki had raised hell the last time he was seriously injured. Katsuki was suddenly grateful that the man had listened to him for once in his damn life instead of continuing to parade around like a male stripper that wasn’t prone to injury.

“You fucking idiot.”

“Hey, language,” Yo rasped in a stage whisper-like tone. Why, Katsuki didn’t know. Michi was literally standing next to him, and had started to also notice the way he was clutching his ribs.

“Hey, the kid gets to learn when someone’s being a fucking idiot, you call them a fucking idiot,” Katsuki spat, the anxiety from earlier in the day returning with a vengeance.

“You’re hurt,” Michi said quietly, her round eyes widening in realization.

Yo flashed her a smile and leaned over to press a kiss to her forehead. “I’m okay, sweetheart. I just need to go clean up and lie down for a little bit. Can you go sit and watch TV or something while Uncle Katsuki helps me out?”

Michi looked over at Katsuki, her expression pleading. “He’s gonna be okay, right?”

Katsuki’s lips pressed into a thin line. Clearly, the girl was more observant than most kids her age, and Yo’s attempt to feign normalcy had fallen flat. Lying to her would probably just cause more panic, so he’d just have to treat her the same way he wanted to be treated at that age.

“Uncle Yo’s hurt, but we won’t know how bad it is until he gets cleaned up.” Katsuki pointed to the sofa. “If you go sit down and behave, then I can get him upstairs and out of his costume. Once we get a better idea how bad it is, then we can decide what to do. If it’s real bad, I’ll yell down to let you know to put your shoes on so we can take him to the doctor. Sound good, pipsqueak?”

Michi’s braids bobbed with the firm nod of her head. She ran over to the sofa, as if the situation could be resolved faster based on her rate of compliance. Katsuki walked up to Yo, draping his spouse’s free arm over his shoulder and feeling his weight immediately settle into his side. His instincts kicked into crisis mode, pushing the panic that had been welling up inside of him into a corner, to be dealt with at a later date. With his therapist.

The steady thrum of his heart pulsed with every step they took upstairs, where he guided Yo into the bathroom and sat him on the edge of the tub. Silently, methodically, he helped peel away the grimy, dirt-and-blood caked costume from his partner’s body, examining each expanse of skin as he did so. There were mostly scratches, probably a couple places that had bruised if the sudden tensing of Yo’s body was any indication. They finally reached the area that had gotten considerably darker and Katsuki’s eyes met Yo’s, which were filled with uncertainty and concern.

Taking a deep breath, Katsuki closed his eyes and placed a hand over Yo’s, summoning all of the patience he had…and some he didn’t.

“Yo, how bad is it? Should I have just taken you to the hospital?”

“No.” Yo shook his head. “It was…it was bad. There wouldn’t have been a point because right now the hospitals are probably throttled.”

“Why didn’t anyone call me?” The question burst from Katsuki’s chest harsher than intended. He bit down on his lip to cut his rage off at the pass. “Why didn’t anyone let me know if it was that bad?”

“We didn’t know,” Yo said quietly. “By the time we did, there wasn’t anything we could do. It was a structural issue with the bridge.” His breathing became increasingly rapid and shallow. “I barely managed to dodge one of the support beams that came down, but I was stupid and clipped something… I-I think it was part of a car door? I’m not sure. Everything went too fast, and I–”

Katsuki pressed his lips to his husband’s, stilling the man’s trembling. He pulled back and continued his work, pulling bandages and antiseptics from the nearby med-kit.

Yo let out a breathy chuckle. “I should get hurt more often.”

“Don’t fuckin’ even,” Katsuki threatened lowly, sucking in a breath and preparing to pull back the protective bodysuit. Within the first inch, he could already tell it was bad, the dark splotchy bruising giving way to a damp crimson stain. He grabbed a rag and began to dab at the wound, frowning at the hissing breath that was pulled through Yo’s teeth.

“Hey, careful.”

“You stupid motherfucker, you don’t get to tell me to be careful.” Katsuki stretched his jaw, feeling the tension building back near his ears. He considered knocking Yo out so he could continue dressing the wound in peace, but then he wouldn’t know if the shitlord had actually passed out, so he thought better of it.

The more area Katsuki cleaned, the better the situation looked. Yes, Yo was still bleeding, but it was more likely that the mess was a result of him neglecting himself long enough for it to collect. Thankfully, Katsuki had decided to take EMT training, just in case. Between that and his mother being his mother, he was well-versed in just about any stitch a person might need to know (and a few they wouldn’t). He was leaning over to grab some cotton padding when he heard the small gasp from the doorway.

“Hey, Mich, we told you to stay downstairs,” Yo said calmly, shifting to try and hide the wound, which only succeeded in undoing some of the bandages Katsuki had already started to apply.

“You weren’t saying anything! You said you’d yell if we have to go to the doctor!” Michi cried, betrayal etched into her features.

“We don’t need to go to the hospital, just go sit down,” Katsuki snapped.

“Katsuki, she’s just a kid. She doesn’t know any better,” Yo said, his tone lined with the same irritating patience and calm that was starting to drive the explosive hero mad.

“She’s old enough to follow instructions,” he bit back. “No big surprise that she doesn’t listen. That’s probably genetic.”

Yo’s brows drew together, signaling that this was about to be a much bigger conversation. He glanced past Katsuki to the girl still leaning around the door frame.

“Michi, honey, we’re going to need a few more minutes, okay? It’ll be all right. It’s just a big scrape that we’re gonna need a big band-aid for. Will you be okay sitting downstairs for a little while longer? When we’re done, I’ll come sit with you and we can watch a movie.”

The child nodded slowly. “Okay.” She slowly retreated down the hall. They waited until they heard the small footsteps against the stairs before turning their attention back to the issue at hand.

“She’s six, Katsuki. You can’t bit a child’s head off like that,” Yo said sternly. “They don’t exactly show this level of detail on the news, so it’s not like she sees this kind of thing every day.” He rubbed at his face with his free hand. “Poor girl is probably traumatized.”

“If she would have listened…” Katsuki started.

“Kids are like that, babe – ow, shit.” Yo winced as Katsuki pressed another layer of dressing over the wound. “They’re curious. That’s not a bad thing, even if the outcome isn’t always great.”

Katsuki placed the last of the medical tape over the gauze and paused. He wasn’t one to talk; when he was that age, he was curious about everything. He probably wouldn’t have even gotten as far as sitting down in the first place.

So much for personal growth. He’d somehow regressed back to old habits, and it sure as hell wasn’t cute bullying someone a fraction of his age.

Yo groaned when Katsuki pulled him to his feet, leaning forward to rest his head against the shorter man’s shoulder. His hands roamed Katsuki’s sides in the same way they did when he was searching for reassurance. His voice was low, his murmured words barely decipherable.

“This is my fault. How am I going to make this up to her?”

Katsuki carded his hand through his husband’s oily, dirt-caked hair and gently pressed a kiss to the side of his neck. How did he keep getting caught up with these self-sacrificing idiots…

Carmine eyes flew open, a flash of an idea dawning on Japan’s number one hero-about to be Japan’s number one uncle. He hated the very idea of it on a spiritual level, but there was little room for pride. At this point, they were already on the ropes.

Yo pulled back and looked down at his spouse, raising a curious eyebrow. “What’s going on in that little chaotic brain of yours?”

“Go lay down and watch your movie.” Katsuki smirked at the head tilt he received in response. “I gotta go make a call.”

🧡👶🖤

Three sets of eyes snapped towards the door when the bell rang throughout the condo. Katsuki glanced over at the girl snuggled up next to Yo’s uninjured side on the sofa.

“You gonna answer that, squirt?” Katsuki asked. “Pretty sure that’s for you. I’m not expecting any company. Yo, you expecting anyone?”

Yo shook his head slowly. “No, I don’t think anyone was supposed to be coming over, but–”

“Must be for Michi.” Katsuki cut him off with a knowing look.

Michi looked between the two with confusion before wiggling free from her place by Yo’s side and walking towards the door. She opened the door just a crack before shutting it again. She looked back at Yo and Katsuki with wide eyes.

“It’s-it’s…”

Katsuki snorted. “Well, don’t just leave the guy out in the hallway. Open the damn door.”

“Who?” Yo asked, pulling into a more upright position.

“Just remember how much you love me later, because if this was for anyone else, I’d rather fucking die,” Katsuki hissed lowly.

Bouncing on her heels, Michi pulled open the door to reveal a very bashful-looking Izuku standing out in the hallway. He was holding a shopping bag in one hand and had a sizable Hero Deku plush tucked under his arm.

“Oh. Uh, H-Hey…how’s it going? Kacchan said you were having a bad day, so I thought I’d swing by after I got done at the uh, h-o-s-p-i-t-a-l,” he said, cupping his hand to the side of his mouth.

“I can spell,” Michi said matter-of-factually. “Uncle Yo needed to go to the doctor, but he didn’t, so now he’s grounded to the sofa.”

Katsuki laughed, winking at Yo, who rolled his eyes. “Hear that? You’re fucking grounded.”

Yo shot him a glare before looking back towards the door. His lips pinched together in disapproval for a moment, but his expression softened when Michi ran back toward him.

“Uncle Yo, that’s Deku! Deku’s at your house! Do you know him?!” she whispered excitedly.

Glancing from Michi to Katsuki to Izuku, Yo let out a slow sigh of resignation. “Yeah, cupcake. I know him. We were both training to be heroes at the same time, once. He even went to school with Uncle Katsuki.”

Michi rounded on Katsuki in an instant, slapping her tiny hands against his knees. “You went to school with Deku? You don’t even have any of his videos! Do you know, do you know he does the SMASH and he can hop up really high walls? Did you know?” She planted her fists on her hips and looked at him like she’d just found out he thought grass was blue.

“We didn’t just go to high school and train to be heroes together,” Izuku started, removing his shoes and setting his bag on the kitchen counter. “We also went to primary school together. I think I’ve known Kacchan since before either of us were able to run, let alone fly.”

“Kacchan?” Michi tilted her head in confusion.

“It’s an old nickname for Uncle Katsuki that Deku insists on using,” Yo explained pointedly, frowning.

Katsuki clicked his tongue. He could practically feel the possessive vibes radiating off of his partner. They’d both gotten better about trusting each other, but that didn’t mean that Yo didn’t occasionally drape himself on Katsuki when in Izuku’s presence, practically marking his territory in front of the other man.

“He couldn’t say my name right, so he just started calling me that cutesy-ass nickname and it stuck.” Katsuki shrugged. “It’s whatever. He wants to sound like an overgrown toddler, that’s on him. Careful, or he’ll start calling you ‘Micchan’ or some shit.”

Michi’s pale face grew red, and the sleeve-shields were back up. “That wouldn’t be bad… I don’t think…”

Yo groaned and got up off the sofa, slowly shuffling toward the stairs. He paused to awkwardly lean over and capture Katsuki’s lips with his own, earning him a grunt of consternation.

“I need a nap, babe. Starting to feel the fatigue kick in. Don’t have too much fun, yeah?”

“Watch your side, dumb ass. You’ll tear your stitches. Next time, I’m using duct tape.” A wicked grin spread across Katsuki’s face. “Or I’ll cauterize it.”

A loud squeal drew their awareness to the corner of the room where Izuku was holding out the stuffed Deku plush to Michi, who immediately took it and buried her face in it.

“Ugh, why did her favorite have to be Midoriya of all people?” Yo asked.

Katsuki shrugged again, patting the hand that rested on his shoulder. “Kids love his dorky ass. You should have seen him the first time one of the marketing reps showed him one of those baby pajama things with his logo on it. Had the bunny hood and everything. You’d have thought someone died, the way he was blubberin’.”

“Didn’t you get something like that around that time? With the-the spiky things?”

“Fuck yeah, I did. Hated it. But it sold well. Probably the closest those moms were to getting their kids to be half as awesome as me.” Katsuki shot Yo another wolfish grin. “You’re gonna be the belle of the damn ball walking around with my brat.”

Yo’s laugh was cut off by a gasp and he clutched his side. “Okay, you’re being disgustingly cute right now, but I really need to lie down. Keep that energy for later.”

“No fucking promises.” Katsuki swatted Yo away, shooing him towards the stairs. He watched his husband ascend the steel steps, his frown deepening with each wince the man tried to conceal. He sensed movement out of the corner of his eye, and he peeled his gaze away from the man disappearing down the hall just in time to see a giant cartoonish Deku sailing through the air towards his face. The rapidly approaching blur of green made him duck his head, but he couldn’t move fast enough and the plush doll collided solidly with his forehead.

“You were supposed to catch!” Michi giggled, planting her hands on her hips again.

“You have to warn someone before you try to play catch with them, Micchan,” Izuku said softly. He patted the girl’s head as he gave a strained smile to Katsuki. “Sorry, Kacchan. I didn’t think she’d throw it, otherwise I would have warned you.”

Katsuki grabbed the toy and tossed the offending thing back at its likeness. “Sure you would’ve.” He stood up and strode into the kitchen, raising an eyebrow at the shopping bag on the counter. “What’s this?”

Izuku’s eyebrows raised and he gestured a quick ‘time-out’ at Michi before quickly joining Katsuki at the counter. “You’d said Shindou had an accident, so I thought I’d grab a few of the ointments from our med center at the agency. Knowing you, you probably already have half a pharmacy, but we recently got in this gel that helps alleviate swelling and pain specific to muscle damage. It’s really great; I’ve already used it at least a dozen times, and I was back to almost a hundred percent within a day or two. Not that I think you even need or want that kind of help, but I felt bad that Shindou had an accident, especially when you both already have a lot on your plates–”

“Whoa, Deku, take a breath.” Katsuki held a hand up to silence the other hero. He reached into the bag and pulled out three clear tubes containing what looked like a celery-tinted viscous substance. There were also two white plastic containers with red lids. Katsuki pointed to the containers and shot Izuku a questioning look.

“Ah, that’s curry,” Izuku answered simply. “Wasn’t sure how up to cooking you’d be. Sorry to say it’s mild, but there’s some extra red chili powder in there to make it more palatable to you.”

Katsuki idly tapped the containers with his fingertips. It was thoughtful; more than thoughtful, actually. He’d just called Izuku as a last-ditch effort to salvage their time with Michi and hopefully rewrite whatever horrible images she’d etched into her brain with something that would be less likely to keep her up at night.

He didn’t want Izuku to be thoughtful. He didn’t want anything from him but the bare minimum of whatever rare favor he had to ask for. The opportunity for him to be an upstanding person – or fuck, even a friend – had long since come and gone.

Green eyes watched him intently, and Katsuki felt the question before it came.

“Do you ever–”

“Nope,” Katsuki said, popping the ‘p’ for extra emphasis. He snatched the bag from the counter and set to putting the containers of food in the fridge for later. No, he never thought about anything other than hero work, his husband, or the mundane goings on that a person might during the course of an ordinary day. It was no stretch to say that he considered the weather more often than he thought about anything having to do with Izuku Midoriya, and that’s how things were going to stay. He’d spent too many hours of his life revolving around the sun that was Deku, and then he realized Deku was just another star in the sky. There were so many others, so many more than shone so much brighter and kept Katsuki so much warmer without burning his ass in the process.

Well, mostly without burning. Let it not be said that Katsuki Bakugou was into boring people. Or drama queens, apparently.

He shut the refrigerator, pausing to listen for footsteps that might’ve been following him, but there was nothing. Instead, there were giggles and a murmured explanation of how Deku’s Air Force gloves functioned. Good.

No sense in asking about things that didn’t matter anymore.

🧡👶🖤

Deku stayed up until dinnertime, when he suddenly received a call and had to leave to take care of an issue back at his agency. Katsuki knew damn well when the freckled hero was lying, but he didn’t press the issue. After all, the objective of his visit had been accomplished; if Michi had any lingering thoughts about what she’d witnessed in the bathroom, she didn’t give any indication.

They ate a fairly uneventful dinner, and Katsuki ran a bath for the girl that she took while he set up the futon in the living room. Once that task was completed, he collapsed on the couch and closed his eyes, allowing himself a brief second of peace. The bathroom door was cracked so he could still hear Michi talking to herself while she bathed. What was it with people who felt the need to fill the silence with their babbling?

“Ah, there’s my quiet man,” Yo hummed, descending the stairs still looking very much like he’d been part of a bridge collapse earlier in the day.

So much for a moment of peace… The corner of Katsuki’s mouth twitched reflexively. As happy as he was that his husband hadn’t been turned into a smear on the pavement, he fervently wished that the man would take a fucking note and actually rest for once in his life.

“Thought you’d be out for the next week,” he mused, adjusting to make room on the sofa for his approaching partner.

Yo slid onto the sofa and situated himself between the explosive hero’s legs, leaning back against his chest. “Have you ever known me to be down for that long? Well, except for our first anniversary, but those were completely different circumstances.”

Katsuki felt his cheeks flush at the memory and he kicked the side of Yo’s leg with his foot. “You’re so fucking embarrassing.”

“Some things never change,” Yo said fondly, folding his and Katsuki’s hands together. “Michi doing okay?”

A loud splash echoed down the hall, followed by a cacophony of giggles and garbled shouts about giant sea monsters. The two heroes glanced at each other curiously.

“Does that sound like drowning to you?” Katsuki asked teasingly.

“I suppose not,” Yo admitted. “Although I didn’t think she was the kind of kid that would be into kaijuu. You must be rubbing off on her.”

“As if the brat would be that lucky.” Katsuki blew a short, huffed laugh out of his nose. He knew exactly what kind of kid she was based on their time together that day alone. She was a colossal terror in a pint-sized package.

“I think we’d both be pretty lucky.” Yo glanced back at him with a knowing smirk and brought one of Katsuki’s hands to his lips.

Katsuki squirmed beneath the heat of his husband’s gaze. Fucking hell, the man was impossible. He was barely stitched, there was a child down the hall, and still, he somehow managed to think with his dick. It would have been impressive if it wasn’t both mortifying and incredibly stupid. It made Katsuki feel wanted, sure, but it also made him question his life choices, just a little.

Another series of splashes and the sound of water rushing through a drain signaled that their moment of respite was coming to an end. Katsuki nudged Yo to scoot over so he could slide off the sofa. He wasn’t about to let a small child risk a concussion just so he could hear how pretty he was.

See, personal growth. He had that shit in spades.

“Don’t think I’m letting you off that easily,” Yo teased.

“You think you got a choice, Stitches?” Katsuki asked, raising an eyebrow. “That’s cute.” He stalked down the hall towards the bathroom before Yo could think of any other clever comebacks that would delay him further. After making sure that Michi had not, in fact, cracked her head open on the edge of the tub or flooded the bathroom – thank fuck, because their homeowners insurance did not cover flood damage – Katsuki ushered her through getting ready for bed and got her settled into the futon.

Yo crouched down, grimacing at the comically large Deku plush firmly tucked in next to the girl.

“Got everything you need, Michi-Peachy?”

“Mhm!” Her tiny feet wiggled under the blankets.

“Okay. You know where the bathroom is, and our room is upstairs if you need anything. Sleep tight.” Yo brushed the hair out of her face and planted a kiss on her forehead.

Michi reached out and grabbed Yo’s sleeve. “Wait! You have to give a kiss to Deku, too!”

Katsuki bit on his fist to keep from laughing at the look that flashed across his husband’s features. If given the choice between planting one on the doll or being back on the collapsing bridge again, he suspected Yo would choose the bridge. His shoulders shook silently at the way Yo placed his palm into the plush’s cheery stitched face, his lips just barely brushing the cotton surface.

After helping Yo back up to his feet and making sure he hadn’t recoiled hard enough to rip open any stitches, Katsuki gave the girl’s head a gentle pat (which was much easier to share with plushy Deku) and followed Yo up to their room.

Yo groaned as he sprawled out on their bed, his hand pressed against his ribs. Katsuki frowned and grabbed the med kit from the small bathroom adjacent to their bedroom. He turned on the mini tactical flashlight and popped it between his teeth while he set to examining the bandages. Yo winced when the tape and gauze were pulled away.

“Jeez, Kat, couldn’t at least put on a cute nurse outfit for me before you start poking at my insides again?”

“Doe moob,” Katsuki mouthed around the handle of the flashlight. His brow furrowed in concentration and he craned his head to get a better look at his handiwork. From what he could see, everything looked to still be in place, although there was a bit of fluid leaking from the stitches he’d have to keep an eye on. His fingers idly fanned out and brushed against bone. A pang of realization hit him.

Two fingers. That was the amount of space between the top of Yo’s wound to his ribs. If he’d crouched a bit lower, or leaned just a bit farther, it could have been much worse than it was. It could have been the kind of injury that Katsuki couldn’t just stitch together. Yo said the hospitals were flooded. Who knows when he would have gotten to see a doctor? And if no one noticed?

Had the body suit been a mistake? Should they make adjustments to the color to make it more obvious when an injury was sustained? Maybe they could add fibers that would illuminate when in contact with blood…

“I can smell the rubber burning from here,” Yo joked, catching Katsuki’s eye when he looked up in surprise. “You were making that serious face that says you’re overthinking something.” He smiled softly, placing his hand over Katsuki’s and giving it a gentle squeeze. “It’s okay. I’m still here. I’ll live to show off my superior dodging skills another day.”

Katsuki scoffed and applied more antiseptic. Maybe if the vibrating hero spent as much time training as he did trying to get into Katsuki’s pants, Katsuki wouldn’t have to spend so much time ‘overthinking’ shit.

“Shut it.” He applied a new layer of bandages and taped everything back up, swatting Yo in the arm for good measure.

Once everything was placed back in the med kit and the kit found its way back in the bathroom cupboard, Katsuki chucked his clothes into the nearby hamper and pulled a pair of sweatpants on. For the first time in recent memory, he decided to forgo a shower in favor of going straight to bed. Dedicated though he was to cleanliness, he was exhausted. The day’s events had pushed the limits of his tolerance for bullshit and all he wanted to do was slip between the sheets and let sleep take him.

He’d managed to start dozing off, his mind drifting somewhere between consciousness and sleep, when he was abruptly and violently woken by tiny hands jostling his face. His eyes snapped open in an instant, his hands heating with the beginning of an explosion before he quickly realized where he was and who was assaulting him.

“Michi,” Katsuki hissed, barely making out the silhouette of the young girl in the dark. “You can’t just fuckin–” He sucked in a sharp breath and took a beat to calm down before continuing. “What d’ya need?”

“I’m scared,” Michi said, her tiny voice sounding impossibly small in the stillness of the room.

“Why didn’t you wake Yo?” Katsuki asked curiously. Unless their face-off in the laundry area had somehow given the kid a warped sense of loyalty, or impressed her in a way that somehow made him the de-facto favorite, he wasn’t sure why he was the recipient of her attention in that particular moment. Nothing about him exactly said “comforting.”

“I…Uncle Yo’s…”

Ah, shit. So much for hoping that the excitement from the latter half of the day somehow overwrote her brief encounter with the downsides of hero work. What in the hell was he supposed to do now? He’d never had nightmares as a kid – at least, none that he ever let anyone know about – so he didn’t exactly have any experiences with his parents to fall back on. Somehow, “suck it up and grow a pair” didn’t feel like the best advice to give.

“Do you–do you want some milk, or uh, a snack? I can put another video on if you want,” Katsuki offered.

“Can I sleep with you?” Michi asked quietly.

Right, that’s what kids typically did. Fucking duh. It wasn’t the worst idea, because if a villain did somehow attack, she’d be flanked by the two adults, and they wouldn’t have to worry about getting downstairs to her. Oh, and it would probably help with any additional nightmares. Did kids that age still wet the bed?

“Mmm, everything okay?” Yo rolled to face them, having been woken from sleep by their conversation.

“Michi’s asking if she can sleep with us,” Katsuki responded simply.

“Oh, yeah, of course,” Yo said softly, moving to make more space between himself and Katsuki. “Come on up, honey. Just be careful.”

The girl hopped up onto the bed, planting her knee firmly in the middle of Katsuki’s thigh and nearly elbowing him in the face. Biting back a swear, he grasped her beneath the arms and rolled her over to sit between the two of them.

“No kicking, flopping, or any of that shit. Go right to sleep,” Katsuki lectured, shoving one of his pillows between them and laying her back on it. “You gotta pee, you better either scoot off and go or let one of us know. Got it?”

Michi nodded in agreement. “Okay, I got it.”

Katsuki laid back down and closed his eyes, willing his body to resume resting. He found it more difficult than usual, as the girl situated between them continuously shifted in her sleep. After an hour of stop/start attempts, he thought about getting up and moving to the sofa. It wouldn’t do any of them any good if he was irritable from lack of sleep.

Just as he was about to slip out from beneath the covers, a small hand reached out and wrapped around the side of his. He opened his mouth to explain to Michi that she’d still have Yo in case anything went wrong, but his words died on his tongue. The child was fast asleep, nestled against Yo’s chest. Yo’s arm was draped over her, moving slightly with the rhythmic rise and fall of her chest.

Fuck, it was really cute. The thought burned in Katsuki’s mind and he tried to chase it away before it settled to no avail. Every instinct he had told him to pull his hand away and go down to the sofa anyway.

Don’t let it sway you. This is still a terrible idea, and you know it.

The little girl sighed and gripped on tighter to Katsuki’s hand, wrangling what little resistance he had from him in the process.

And, if he was being honest, a bit of his heart went with it.

🧡👶🖤

Katsuki woke early to find Yo staring at him, a wide smile plastered against his face. The blonde’s brow furrowed in confusion until he realized that sometime in the night, Michi had made her way out of Yo’s grasp and had firmly attached herself to his torso. Somehow, she’d managed to do so without waking him, which was an alarming thought in itself. Katsuki was a notoriously light sleeper.

Now, not only did he have to worry about looking like some kind of soft, sappy idiot, but he had to worry about child-sized assassins that could potentially get to him without him waking up. Fan-fucking-tastic.

Michi stirred slightly as she began to wake, her thin arm tugging free so she could stretch and managing to connect cleanly with Katsuki’s jaw. Yo coughed on the laugh he tried to hide, which only caused him to groan in pain and grab his side.

Good. Served the asshole right.

Quickly untangling from the squirming child, Katsuki rolled out of bed and set to making breakfast. The more distance he could put between him and the disgustingly domestic scene he’d stupidly fallen asleep to, the better. Even though it was nice, it definitely wasn’t their life. What were they supposed to do, quit their jobs as heroes and become…teachers? Office workers? A couple of losers whose greatest aspirations were to be seen through their children? Hard pass.

The rest of their day was relatively peaceful – at least in comparison to the previous day – but that didn’t necessarily make it any less exhausting. Thankfully, there were no emergencies from work, which gave them some time to do “normal” things, like take Michi to the park. Since Yo was still recovering, most of the physical activity was left to Katsuki, who made sure to frown every time he got the feeling that Yo was pointing a phone in his direction. He wasn’t going to admit out loud that he didn’t mind pushing the girl on the swings, or helping her across the jungle gym, and he sure as hell wasn’t going to permit any physical evidence of it.

He was fairly confident he’d been successful, until Yo sent him the single photo he’d managed to get while Katsuki wasn’t looking. Despite his best efforts, Katsuki wasn’t able to get his hands on the device to destroy it. Knowing Yo, he’d probably sent it to at least a dozen people by the time he showed it to Katsuki. He swore he hadn’t sent it to Katsuki’s mother, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t.

Which was great, really. Just what Katsuki needed: more blackmail materials to be used against him in combination with his husband’s already conspiratorial relationship with the hag. He hated them both.

By the time Yori came to pick Michi up finally rolled around, Katsuki had already been subjected to two viewings of the Deku movie Michi insisted they get for their collection and another round of surprise hide-and-seek. Yo, for his part, had only managed to peel one small orange and harass Katsuki about how cute it was that he’d managed to curb his swearing for the day every chance he got.

Joke was on him; next time Yo wanted to go to one of those stupid couple activities like that painting and wine thing he loved to arbitrarily spring up, or ballroom dancing, or any one of the other inane things the man insisted they try, Katsuki fully intended to communicate only in cursing.

He might’ve gone slightly soft, but the day Katsuki Bakugou stopped being petty was the day he got put in the fucking ground.

Once their company had departed, Katsuki and Yo warmed up some of the (actually not terrible) curry Deku had brought the day before and settled in for the night. Little was said between the two, but it was clear that something was on Yo’s mind that was causing him to be tense. Interesting as the weekend had been, it hadn’t ultimately changed Katsuki’s mind that they weren’t in a good position to consider kids.

At least, not yet. It was going to be a difficult conversation, because Katsuki got the feeling that Yo somehow still thought it would be manageable. At the very least, he didn’t show any indications that he’d regretted their little weekend experiment.

Sore in a way they hadn’t been since their early days as heroes, they crawled into bed and stared at the ceiling. The house was quiet, save the low hum of the alarm clock on the nightstand and their steady breathing.

After a few moments of peaceful bliss, Katsuki broke the silence. “So…”

“If you’re going to mock me, please save it,” Yo interrupted.

Ah, so he did regret it. Katsuki wanted to be happy about being right, but the defeat lining the tone of his husband’s voice stole what little joy he would have gotten from yet another victory over the blind confidence of Yo Shindou. Did he really want kids after all?

This suddenly felt like a much bigger conversation than his fatigued brain was capable of having at half past eleven at night.

“Maybe,” he began, brushing the back of his hand gently along Yo’s forearm. “Maybe this just means that we need to get some stuff taken care of before we are ready to have kids. Maybe if we sit down, look at our schedul–”

“It was an absolute disaster, Katsuki.” Rolling to his side, Yo let out a low groan. “Michi ran us half to death, and we didn’t even have her for a full two days. Add work to that in any capacity, and we’d be lucky to make it two hours.”

Katsuki frowned and squeezed Yo’s hand briefly. “Sorry. I know this was something you wanted.”

“I’m a big boy, Kat. I’ll get over it.” Yo rested his forehead against Katsuki’s. “I’m good with our little family for right now. And hey, this way I won’t age prematurely.”

Running his fingers through his husband’s dark strands, Katsuki snorted gently. “I dunno; I think a little silver on the sides could be sexy. Maybe grow your facial hair out a bit? I could get into that.”

“Now you’re being a tease, which is incredibly cruel since I don’t think I could do anything about it if had the energy to,” Yo whined.

Katsuki laughed softly. “Sorry. Dick move.” His heart fluttered as his partner exhaled a happy sigh. Maybe they would be okay after all. He’d heard of marriages that fell apart when there was a problem with having children, but he wasn’t really worried about that. They’d been through worse and come out better for it.

“Hey.” Yo’s brow furrowed and he pushed the bangs out of Katsuki’s eyes. “It’s okay, really. Don’t look so worried. Your forehead lines are already starting to show.” He laughed as Katsuki swatted his hands away. “Really, it’s fine. If it happens someday, then that’s great. If not, I’m okay with being a hot uncle.”

“Or ‘guncle’ whatever the fuck that is,” Katsuki said, recalling the term Kaminari had used earlier in the day. “Sounds gross if you ask me.”

A barking laugh erupted from Yo’s mouth and he rushed to cover it, wincing as he did so. “Katsuki, where did you even…”

“Fuckin’ Spark – er – Denki mentioned it. Said something about getting me a t-shirt when I told him we had Michi for the weekend.”

“It’s slang for ‘gay uncle.’ It’s like a term of endearment, so don’t feel like you have to go kick his ass or anything.”

“Oh don’t worry, he’ll give me at least five more reasons when we have patrol next week.”

“Speaking of patrol, we should probably get to sleep.” Yo glanced upward, like he was manually searching his mind for something. “Both of us have the swing shift tomorrow, if my calendar is accurate.”

Unfortunately, his calendar was absolutely correct. Katsuki had his shifts etched into memory at that point. “Yeah yeah…shit, I’m going to have to take a long shower and stretch out if I’m still this stiff in the morning.”

“Keep telling you babe, go back to yoga. Momo seemed to like spending the time with you.”

Katsuki grumbled at the thought. Yoga was fine; he liked the way he felt afterward. What he didn’t love was the idea that he somehow enjoyed the company. That, and Sero in yoga pants was a bit more than he ever wanted to see of his old friend.

Ever.

He made a mental note to ask Momo about alternative options when he saw her at work next and turned off the lamp. He closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep, but couldn’t seem to get his mind to completely wind down. He’d passed right out after patrol with a sore body before, so what was the problem? He shook it off and tried shifting his body a bit. Maybe a more comfortable position would help him drift off.

“Having a hard time too?” Yo asked.

“Yeah,” Katsuki admitted. No sense in pretending otherwise. Maybe Yo had some insight he didn’t.

“I feel like I keep listening for movement, if that makes sense. Like Michi is still here and is going to run down the hall at any moment.”

He hated to admit it, but that feeling was familiar. There was something strangely calming about the way the little girl had wedged her way in-between them in the middle of the night. Both he and Yo were entirely too still when they slept, but Michi had wiggled and flailed and huffed small sighs that let them know she was still alive when her tiny body remained in place too long.

Fuck, was he really missing that?

Maybe “someday” wasn’t as far off as he thought.

“Not gonna lie. The house feels…a little weird, being this quiet…ya think?”

Yo and Katsuki looked at one another, searching each other’s face for the answer. Finally, they both nodded, as if coming to a silent understanding.

“…I’ll call Hanta in the morning.”