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Naturally the Crown Prince of Xianle wanted privacy and of course, his Ghost King happily obliged.
In the hall, Ruoye sat in a heap, feeling dejected when suddenly, a gleaming silver scimitar was unceremoniously also cast out of the room.
E’Ming shivered, eye rolling in its socket curving up as though about to shed a tear as it trembled.
Ruoye fluttered over rather curiously. They’d worked well together protecting their masters for 800 years. Now that their masters had each other and both were abundant in spirityal power, dread washed over them as they suddenly felt unneeded. It was too much!
And Ruoye also began to tremble.
After a few moments of distress, E’Ming steeled itself, and straightened its posture. It was fine. Everything was fine. There was no need to cry!
Ruoye also stopped shaking and waited for E’Ming to lead.
E’Ming and Ruoye both knew they were content when attached to their masters. Well at least Ruoye was. But could they be content elsewhere?
It was as if they both became sentient all at once. They raced each other to the end of the hall and back just to see if they could, E’Ming slicing through the air as it flew and Ruoye fluttering through like a cool , gentle breeze. They were spiritual tools after all. They could move independently, sense danger within a certain proximity, and fight all on their own.
And so, they spent the next few hours flying throughout Paradise Manor taking in all there was to see from heights they’d never been allowed to explore.
They wanted to go in the armory too to see if there were any other spiritual weapons who might want to join them on their escapades while their masters were busy intertwined in each other’s arms.
But when they saw the two dice sitting on a small shelf beside the door. They both froze, remembering that night in Hua Chengzhu’s great gambling hall.
There was a technique to dice rolling. They couldn’t just— unceremoniously shove the dice onto the ground. No. It would not be acceptable!
After a few moments of swaying in thought, E’Ming came up with an idea and flew a few paces away from the door while Rouye slithered off to the side. Was E’Ming going to force it’s way in?
With a loud thud and a flash of light, E’Ming slammed itself into the door, closed eye first.
When the light dissipated, the scimitar was gone. In its place sat a small child wearing red robes, dark pants, and a black eye patch covering where a left eye would have been. He clutched his head wearily and let out a sigh then looked up at Rouye with a pleading eye that silently screamed join me?
So Ruoye also fluttered a ways away and squared itself up before the door to the armory and stiffened one end of itself and rammed into the door. With another flash and a thud, the silk strip of fabric was replaced with a child of similar size with white hair and white robes and wide, curious eyes.
E’Ming’s eye curved up again, this time, with a look of glee and relief and extended a closed hand to Rouye.
Elated, Ruoye accepted what it was given only to find that it was the two dice E’Ming had plucked from the shelf with its newly formed hand.
A look of horror crossed the white-clad Ruoye as E’Ming rolled on the floor cackling.
Rouye knew only too well that his master was cursed when it came to luck. For eight hundred years, they both suffered. Sure his shackles were broken, but that didn’t erase the trauma of the the never-ending snake eyes.
Sensing Ruoye's trepidation, E’Ming suddenly stopped laughing and scooted over to clasp its own pale hands over Ruoye’s slightly pinker ones and help it shake.
Together! They decided, releasing the dice over the shelf.
With a small clatter, they rolled two sixes and the doors of the armory slid open with ease.
But what they saw on the other end wasn’t the inside of the familiar armory at Paradise Manor. Instead, they found themselves in a grand palace.
Ruoye recognized it immediately as the Palace of Xianle. Even though Xie Lian expressed he didn’t need it, the other Heavenly Officials insisted one be built anyways just in case, gods forbid, anything every went awry between him and the Ghost King and the Crown Prince needed his own space.
While Ruoye marveled at the architecture, E’Ming folded its short little arms and clicked his tongue as it shook his head. What a waste of resources. Just as they moved a few steps away, the door behind them closed. For a moment they thought nothing of it until they realized they were without dice. They’d dropped it back onto the shelf on the other side of the door when they rolled.
Now, the two spiritual weapons were trapped in Heaven in human forms.
They tried ramming their heads into another door. Another wall, but to no avail. Ruoye blamed E’Ming for the stupid idea while E’Ming blamed Ruoye for following so foolishly and soon enough the two were fighting. They were both fast as lightning and strong in their attacks, bashing each other into the walls so hard that the entire Xianle palace shook with every impact.
Soon enough, other Heavenly Officials began emerging from their own palaces to come see what the ruckus was about. None of them expected the Flower Crowned Prince to return to Heaven at all, let alone bring his dear Ghost King and start fighting in Xianle Palace!
Maybe the Ghost King didn’t want his Highness to leave Ghost City. No! That wouldn’t make sense either. They were in love! So what was happening in Xianle Palace?
“I swear if Crimson Rain so much as thinks he can lay a fucking finger on his highness—“ Feng Xin cursed as he marched up the steps to the Xianle Palace with his bow in hand and three arrows at the ready.
“We know where his ashes are!” Mu Qing joined Feng Xin carrying his own saber.
Together, they wrenched open the doors to His Highness’s palace and raised their weapons.
What they found inside was neither the Crown Prince, nor Crimson Rain Sought Flower.
All there was, was two children entangled in each other’s sleeves, biting and pulling each other's hair, very obviously fighting.
Mu Qing grimaced in disgust while Feng Xin cursed once more “FUCK! What the fuck is this?!”
The two children immediately kept apart and turned to the newcomers with wide, innocent eyes that puzzled the two martial gods of the South West and South East.
Mu Qing acted first, pressing his index and middle finger to his temple. “Just recite the Ethics Sutra a thousand times.” He said aloud.
Before Mu Qing could say anything, he left, sweating profusely after hearing some rather undignified sounds on the other end. “I’ll call back later.”
“So… they’re fine?” Feng Xin asked, arms folded, bow slung across his back.
Mu Qing shuddered and turned back to the two children, Ruoye had smoothed its white hair and E’Ming had straightened its eyepatch and tunic as they sat some distance away from each other. “More than fine.”
“Then what the fuck are these?” Feng Xin asked.
“That one—“ Mu Qing pointed at the little one in red.
It shrunk back as if afraid to be struck.
“—must be Crimson Rain’s right eye. Making that one…”
“His Highness’s Useless Scarf?” Feng Xin finished.
With no one to console it, Ruoye’s shoulders began to shake and his eyes went wide, devastated.
E’Ming frowned and launched himself onto Feng Xin with such force, the Martial God of the Southeast was thrown past the steps and into the street before all of the Heavenly Officials who came to see the ruckus at the Xianle Palace.
Useless? I’ll show you useless! the little thing in red thought to itself with each punch it landed on the General Nan Yang.
“WHAT THE FUCK! GET THE FUCK OFF ME!” Feng Xin yelled as he wrestled with the tiny but fast creature hell bent on punching his face in. Each blow left a very fine scratch on his skin, his sleeve, his armor. Each scratch resembling the attacks of Crimson Rain Sought Flower’s legendary scimitar E’Ming.
As if suddenly remembering something, the little one in white that had been crying after being called useless leapt out of the palace and tackled the little one in red, holding him back, away from Feng Xin.
The Martial God got up and brushed some of the blood off his face.
“Those marks—“
“It’s him!”
“It’s the saber E’Ming!” Suddenly all of the eyes of the Heavenly Court were on the two small, silent children.
Suddenly, instead of holding E’Ming Back, Ruoye stepped in front, still holding his companion as though wanting to avoid anymore confrontations at all costs.
“Why are they separated from their masters?” One Heavenly Official Asked.
“Why do they look like this?”
“Should we lock them in a mountain?”
“Should we call Crimson Rain and his Royal Highness?”
No! Both small children leapt for the hands of gods that had moved for their temples. You simply cannot interrupt Hua Chengzhu and Taizi Dianxia when they’re together! And they’ll be angry we’ve made such a fuss!
Sensing such genuine fear from these two spiritual weapons, the Heavenly Officials decided to hold off on calling their masters for the time being.
A many grew bored and wandered off leaving Feng Xin and Mu Qing to deal with things.
“Why are you here?” Mu Qing asked the two after taking them back to Xuan Zhen Palace.
Neither spiritual weapon spoke.
“Can they even speak?” Feng Xin asked. “Can any spiritual weapons speak?”
Both E’Ming and Ruoye both looked at each other. They could understand but didn’t ever once consider the thought of speech. Ruoye touched its own neck wondering if it had the muscles to move arms and legs, did it also have the muscles to produce sound in this form? When it was just it and E’Ming? Talking wasn’t needed. They’d worked together so much recently, protecting their masters, they didn’t need to communicate. They could just guess what the other was thinking… most of the time.
“Wait—“ Mu Qing paused in his step then remembered and swiftly scooped up both spiritual weapons, for a moment forgetting they were weapons and thinking of them only as troublesome children.
Without another word, Feng Xin followed as Mu Qing made his way to the Palace of General Ming Guang.
Sure enough, in the throne room sat General Pei Ming arguing with his sword.
“Please forgive the intrusion!” Mu Qing expressed.
“Did something happen? Forgive me if I’ve been a bit— preoccupied.”
“We found these two making a mess of Xianle Palace,” Mu Qing explained holding the two weapons by the scruff of their robes in a single hand. He released his hold and they both plopped onto the floor with a thud.
“They don’t seem to talk so we were wondering if your spiritual weapon could get an explanation out of them.”
“Could this actually be legendary E’Ming and Ruoye?” Ming Guang marveled as he flew down from Pei Ming’s throne and swirled around the two small weapons.
E’Ming closed his red right eye and harrumphed. Nobody but Ruoye had any right to actually speak to it.
Ruoye placed a hand on E’ming’s shoulder and bore an expression of concern then looked around at Feng Xin, Mu Qing, Pei Ming, and finally at the sword Ming Guang with trepidation. They were vulnerable in this form. Only E’Ming was pretending they weren’t.
Suddenly, Ming Guang let out a raucous laughter, floating up and down as though clutching his nonexistent chest to contain his nonexistent breath.
“Ugh! These two— they’re too much! So apparently they were feeling unneeded and sad so they started exploring Paradise Manor on their own but soon got bored and lonely and well— I’m sure Ruoye cut out some specifics but they needed hands to opens a door and so E’Ming transformed first and then Ruoye followed but the door didn’t lead where they meant to go and they ended up in Xianle palace and then Ruoye got scared when they realized they didn’t have a way back and started fighting and now we’re here!— oh! And Ruoye says not to tell their masters or else E’Ming will be punished severely!”
E’Ming turned and looked at Ruoye with an expression of utmost betrayal. How DARE Ruoye divulge so much to strangers?!
Sensing another brawl about to take place, Feng Xin and Mu Qing each grabbed one of the spiritual weapons by the back of their tiny robes.
E’Ming kicked and flailed but was unable to strike with its normal amount of power without something to launch itself off of in this form.
Meanwhile, Ruoye just sighed and looked up at the sky, wondering when their masters would finish with each other and notice they were missing, or if they would even remember they existed.
Ming Guang let out a sigh and moved over to Ruoye, tapping the hilt of itself on Ruoye’s shoulder as if offering condolences.
“There there, they’ll come around.”
“A—“ a small voice squeaked.
Everyone turned to its source, the little red thing hanging from Feng Xin’s hand had finally stopped struggling and hung limply with its eye closed. “A-are you sure?” It was E’Ming! E’Ming had spoken!!!
No one had ever imagined such a fearsome weapon would have such a small, timid little voice.
Feng Xin and Mu Qing released the weapons. As soon as they did, Ruoye ran over and hugged E’Ming as it started to sniffle. “Now that His Highness’s spiritual powers are back, will they ever want us again?”
And E’Ming started crying, full on balling on the floor in the Ming Guang Palace of General Pei Ming.
“WHY THE FUCK IS IT CRYING?!” Feng Xin exclaimed tearing at his own hair. While Mu Qing rolled his eyes.
“I say we just them over Ghost City or Puqi Shrine or wherever their masters last were and call it a day!” Pei Ming suggested.
“You can’t do that! You cruel creature! You call yourself a god?!” Ming Guang yelled flying back over to his former owner. “E’Ming will get in trouble with his master!”
“Do we really care? E’Ming is a scimitar! They’re not— actually children!” Feng Xin inquired.
“How about this, we return you and say it was just a small misunderstanding, alright?” Mu Qing suggested to the two spiritual weapons holding each other on the floor.
Both of them looked up, E’Ming rubbing that red eye raw, skeptical but not outright protesting.
Alright.
Even after cooperating to defeat Bai Wuxiang and protect the Royal Capital, the Heavens and the Ghosts still weren’t on the best of terms and so, Feng Xin and Mu Qing decided to don disguises when they did enter Ghost City and sneak in. On their way, they ran into none other than the former wind master, Shi Qingxuan.
“How could I not recognize you Generals! Even as Fu Yao and Nan Feng, you’re too obviously gods. You really should both turn into a woman! Women have stronger yin energy. So it will be easier to move more discreetly within ghost city!”
E’Ming and Ruoye both couldn’t help but snicker at the expressions that took form on the faces of the Martial Gods of the Southwest and Southeast.
“So what brings you to Ghost City?!” The former Wind Master asked, cheerful and chatty as always.
“It seems Crimson Rain and His Highness have both lost something rather important.”
“And what might that be?” Shi Qingxuan asked, thoroughly intrigued.
Mu Qing picked them both up, one in each hand.
“Ahhhh they’re cute!” Shi Qingxuan took them both in her arms and spun them around, nestling her face into their hair while E’Ming gagged and Ruoye grimaced, leaning away from the Wind Master’s breasts.
“Yeah yeah whatever we just need to get them back. Do you know if Crimson Rain is in?”
“Yeah— he’s taking leisure at the Qiangdeng temple.”
“Let’s go!”
And so the three of them embarked. Both E’Ming and Ruoye forgot their initial revulsion towards Shi Qingxuan’s breasts and found it a very convenient perch to lean on while they took in all the sights of Ghost City. It was much more exciting than the inside of Xie Lian’s sleeve, or the view from Hua Cheng’s hip. From up here they could see so creatures and so many faces. They could see laughter and crying and despair and elation and hear and smell.
After at least half an hour of walking did the population start to thin out as they entered the outskirts of The Ghost King’s private residence.
“You seem to know your way around here rather well, Wind Master,” Feng Xin commented.
“Ah,” Shi Qingxuan chuckled nervously. “Yeah.” She never once wanted to remember the night she, Lang Qianqiu and his Highness the Crown Prince. Not because they discovered the fake Ming Yi in the labyrinth of doors but because of that damn gaudy purple dress she had to wear when serving the Ghost King!
And so she lead them straight Qiangdeng temple where Xie Lian sat on the dais overseeing Hua Cheng practicing lines.
Without Ruoye around Xie Lian’s wrist to twitch when someone was present, and E’Ming hanging from Hua Cheng’s waist to spin in distress, the three Heavenly Officials were able to get closer than ever to the Ghost King before being noticed.
“Wind Master!” Xie Lian exclaimed with delight. “Mu Qing! Feng Xin! What brings you to—“
“E’ming!” Hua Cheng’s voice thundered as he pressed his brush down making a messy, dark blotch of ink on his parchment. “What are you doing in the arms of another—“
“Lady Wind Master is warmer,” E’Ming whispered.
Hua Cheng’s expression was complicated, like a father stunned by a rebellious child; he didn’t blink.
“Now now I’m sure it’s all just a misunderstanding!” Xie Lian laughed nervously waving his hands as he approached the wind master to take the two back. “And wow! E’ming’s you can even speak in this form? Even better than Ruoye!”
At the sound of that, Ruoye slumped a little while E’Ming straightened up a bit more with Xie Lian’s praise, forgetting Hua Cheng’s wrath for a moment.
“Where did you find them?” Xie Lian asked, holding them in one arm and rubbing their backs with his other until they both calmed down.
“They stumbled into Heaven. It was an accident. No harm done.” Feng Xin lied through gritted teeth.
Xie Lian smiled. “Then pray— why is there blood on your cheek?”
With a light pomf, E’Ming buried its face in Xie Lian’s shoulder, ashamed. “I’m sorry I hurt him, your Highness. I know you still care for your friends.”
Meanwhile, Hua Cheng let out a laugh. “There's no need to apologize for that, E’Ming, he probably deserved it!”
E’Ming let out a sigh of relief while Ruoye looked shock.
Xie Lian covered E’ming’s ears then. “How could you say such a thing!”
“Well,” a voice even smaller than E’ming’s whispered. “General Nan Yang did call Ruoye useless. E’Ming was just defending Ruoye.“
“Is that so?” Xie Lian gasped.
Mu Qing rolled his eyes. “Whatever! Just— pls don’t let those things out of your sight again. Who knows what sort of mischief they’ll get up to!”
“Will do! Thank you for bringing them back! Would you like to stay for dinner? I can cook! San Lang has been teaching me how!”
Both Mu Qing and Feng Xin shuddered. “Eh? What’s that? Right away— sorry gotta go! Emergency at Nan Yang Palace!”
“And at Xuan Zhen! Sorry, your Highness!”
And with that, the two martial gods fled.
“I will never turn down a chicken leg,” Shi Qingxuan exclaimed, turning back into his male form.
“Excellent! E’Ming, Ruoye, now that you’ve had your fun, why not help me prepare a soup to go with our chicken tonight."
Both spiritual weapons faces lit up. Cooking with his Highness was fun! Son enough, they turned to each other with a competitive glint in their eyes, ready to have a vegetable chopping competition in their new forms.
“I can’t believe how strong you both are now to be able to sustain such disguises!” Xie Lian explained.
They beamed. “It was an experiment and— and—“ Ruoye stammered.
“In this form… even General Nan Yang couldn’t bear to hit E’Ming!” E’Ming declared proudly. “We could use this and become con artists!”
“No!” Xie Lian shut down immediately as Hua Cheng laughed, following his dearly beloved carrying their spiritual weapons.
Just then there was the putter patter of feet and Rouye ran back into Qiandeng temple to grab Shi Qingxuan’s hand and bring him along to the kitchens.
“Best not to wander alone here. You might end up back in Heaven!” Ruoye whispered.
Shi Qingxuan let out a hearty laugh as the little scarf lead him away.