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Mallory was a simple reporter. She worked her way up through the corporate ladder to become a TV interviewer in hero society. It took years, but she made a name for herself. She was known as “The Unfortunate Interviewer” because true to her namesake, every interview she led went horribly, horribly wrong. She never gotten to the end of an interview without something going awry.
You’d think that one fact would have her out on the streets shouting “SPARE CHANGE” to anyone she can for rent; however, her rating was the highest of all interviewers for one simple reason.
The interviews were never boring.
On a sunny day in mid-June, she strolled down the road looking like the main character in a movie right once they’ve figured out life and their purpose. She had finally thought of the perfect interview plan that would guarantee nothing would go wrong. The Top Three Heroes (Forseti, Ground Zero, and Regulus) were set to interview with Mallory at the end of the week, and the idea couldn’t have come at a better time!
Why not invite on as surprise guests the unseen people behind out beloved heroes. Their parents.
Somewhere in the underground passages of UA known only to a certain stoat, Nezu shuddered as even he couldn’t have thought a more world-ending idea.
“Good Evening Everyone! As you all know, my name is Mallory and I will be your host for this evening. We have some very special guests for y’all tonight that I hope everyone will enjoy! First let’s bring out our guests The Youngest Top Three Heroes in History. Forseti a.k.a. Midoriya Izuku. Ground Zero a.k.a. Bakugo Katsuki. And Regulus a.k.a Todoroki Shouto!”
“Thank you so much for having us on tonight, Mallory! Its always a pleasure to be interviewed by you.”
“Why thank you Forseti. How are you today?”
“I’m great! I was just reading about your quirk, and I’m always so interested in how fortune and luck quirk works in general, and we should definitely talk later about its limits because it is honestly so fascinating and – “
“Shut Up Shitty Nerd!”
“Bakugou. It is not proper to curse on live TV.”
“Don’t worry Regulus, we already have it approved by the network.”
“Thank Fuck! Let’s get on with this shit.”
Everyone laughed at the genuine relief that flooded the number two hero’s face once he realized he could stop policing his vernacular for the sake of children at home. The interview continued as normal more the better part of the next ten minutes until events started to implode.
“Well, y’all, we’ll be right back with our heroes for more fun including a special surprise for you and them!”
People at home were overjoyed about another surprise during the unusually smooth interview. The heroes on the other hand were freaking out and rightfully so.
“Why are they bringing more chairs?”
“You’ll see.”
“What’s with that shit-faced grin lady?”
“I do not particularly like surprises. My last one consisted of boiling water and I’m not ready for another scar-level of commitment.”
“Welcome back! Now y’all may be wondering why there are some more chairs present than before, but there’s a good reason. We wanted to highlight you heroes, but also point out some people behind the heroes. We called a few people you know personally, and they agreed to surprise you! Please welcome the parents of our top three heroes!”
The minute Mitsuki, Enji, and surprisingly Hisashi were visible to the trio, nothing changed. On the surface, everything was normal; however, the air became charged with a sense of foreboding that everyone including those watching at home could feel.
Then Izuku smiled in a way people haven’t seen since his time fighting AFO and everyone knew shit was about to go down.
“Let’s start with our Number One hero’s father Midoriya Hisashi. How was it to raise a pro-hero as smart and gifted as Izuku?”
“It was a true pleasure. I was unfortunately away for a good amount of his childhood, but he has become a true son to be proud of. Of course, I’ve kept in touch since I’ve been gone, but I haven’t been able to see Izuku face-to-face since the last time I was allowed time to travel back home from America.”
Before Mallory could say anything, the entire studio went dead silent as the three pro-heroes sitting across from their parents started cackling like hyenas. They couldn’t stop and they continued for minutes before they settled down enough to speak.
“You want this one nerd?”
“It would be my pleasure.”
The amount of civility portrayed between the friends and rivals was revolutionary so much so that it was downright terrifying.
“Hello Hisashi. Terrible to see you. How long has it been? 18..or has it been 20 years? Who knows.”
“Very funny Izuku. Son, you know we talked on the phone a few days ago.”
“One: I’m non-binary. Fix yourself. Two: If you really want me to pretend that we are a happy family then I need some clarification on what I’m supposed to be forgetting. Let me make a list. You were physically abusive to your wife and child for years until you left when I was 4 because I hadn’t developed a quirk. You manipulated my mother into believing that I was the reason our lives were so bad, so she became emotionally abusive and neglectful. Also, where were you at her funeral when I was 14? Because I sure as hell don’t remember seeing you there. I HAD TO MAKE THE ARRANGEMENTS BY MYSELF AT 14!”
“That is no way to speak to your father, you brat!”
“Kindly, Mitsuki, shut the fuck up. You don’t wanna get me started on your plethora of emotional and physical abuse that I didn’t get proof of until it was pointless to press charges. Muzzling a middle schooler in a closet all weekend is not a fair punishment for getting a 99 on a test meant for high schoolers thank you very much.”
The audience and viewers were left speechless at the accusations sent around. The other two pros were silent wearing matching smiles that radiated pride for their ferocious green bean.
“See, we were raised by two married pros we met at UA. They housed us, fed us, comforted us, sent us to therapy, and have been our biggest supporters since day one. I can genuinely say that I would not be here without them. I wish I could give them the credit they deserve, but some secrets are better kept. But I will say this: Dad. Pops. We love you and thank you for raising us when these shit-stains couldn’t be bothered to. “
There was not a dry eye in the room once Izuku was done speaking except for the obvious ones on camera. While that may seem like the end of the rant, one parent still felt like they needed to voice an obviously stupid opinion.
“I did amazing training My Shouto. He is a perfect masterpiece and will make it to Number One by the next ranking.”
“I have no clue who are talking about. I am an orphan.”
“Shouto. I am sitting right here.”
“If you can pretend that my dead brother turned not-so-dead villain doesn’t exist, then I can say that my retired pro-hero abusive father is dead. Therefore, I am an orphan.”
The last thing all the viewers hear is laughter coming from the “abusive parent squad” and an angry roar accompanied by flames that would cost Enji more than the anger was worth. Everyone else just thought it was worth it for the clip that he would never live down.
It is now a rule in all hero interviews that there can be no surprises of parental proportions.