Work Text:
Warnings: m/m, Benn Trilett/Tahn Dorn, 100% writing this out of spite, no I did not spell Benjamin wrong. That is how the author spells it in Tahn.
...
The limp that had plagued him for the last few months was finally going away. He was no longer needing the staff Lord Trilett had given him to get along. Lady Netta Trilett watched him constantly not approaching but being just inside the field of his notice.
Tahn knew what she wanted of him but it was not something he could give. She wanted him to share her feelings. Feelings that he could not remember receiving except by the children he protected. He didn't know what it was meant to be loved by a family much less a lover.
That was what she wanted from him. She wanted him to fall in love with her and take her as his wife. Tahn had taken Lady Trilett's lover from her. Then he protected her from Samis when the order had gone out to bring her to Samis and kill the rest. The children had won her affection towards him. Tahn protected her but he thought of her more as a sibling. Much like as he thought of Lukas when they were being trained by Samis.
Maybe it was time to leave. If he left she wouldn't have a choice but to find someone else. Someone more appropriate than a broken assassin.
Footsteps approaching drew him out of his thoughts. They were too heavy to be one of the children or the Lady. Jarel was too terrified of him to approach. Turning he saw a dark-haired man with kind blue eyes heading towards Tahn. He swallowed this was Lord Trilett, Bennamin, or Benn as he preferred.
Tahn bowed his head in respect greeting softly, "Lord Trilett."
Bennamin winced at his title as he said his voice a deep and rich rumble, "Mr. Dorn I have told you time and time again. Call me Benn or Bennamin if you must. You are getting better at moving around. How are you feeling?"
Softly Tahn replied, "I am well, sir. Soon I'll be able to take Smoke and leave."
There was a flash of pain across the man's face. Tahn didn't understand it. How could they still want him to stay? He had prepared the guards to protect the manor. They didn't need him anymore.
Bennamin said, "I don't think you understand me. I want you to stay as well."
"We've been through this," sighed Tahn, "I cannot stay much longer. You will not need me, and I don't belong here."
Bennamin's voice broke as he denied, "That's not true. You always have a place here. Just as the children do."
Tahn sighed feeling the weight of the world on his shoulder, "I cannot stay here. My presence will only be a reminder of what you have lost. I'll visit the children but that's all."
"Tahn..."
Tahn didn't wait to hear what else the other might say. Bennamin simply pitied. That was why he did this. Tahn couldn't handle his guilt or the pity. Just a few more days and he would be gone. Just a few more days.
Why did it hurt so much to not stay with the man? Why did it feel like an arrow went through his heart instead of his leg?