Archive of Our Own ^beta

For Jason Grace, WcDonalds has always been a queer sanctuary. It’s where he came out to his parents, crying all the while, which was very, very dramatic considering the fact that Thalia had come out a whole three years ago and their parents were very, very accepting (Perhaps too accepting, if Hera’s whispers of a certain “Mr Ganymede” mean anything). It’s where he used to hang out with his very queer friend group, and where he met his second partner, Leo, who had been fixing the drink dispenser. For those reasons and more, Jason sees WcDonalds as one of the most sacred places in the world, a place where he can pretend that homophobic entities like Chick-fil-A don’t exist.

What this means is that when his roommate, Will, has a mini breakdown about the homophobic guy he’s been seeing at WcDonalds, Jason goes absolutely apeshit.

“I don’t want to assume anything, but he keeps staring at me,” Will says through tears. “He always does it when he thinks I’m not watching. And then when I wear something gay like a crop top or makeup, he always glares at me really weirdly, like there’s something wrong with me. I tried talking to him the other day and I really think that we were starting to become friends, but then when Percy came over and put his arm around me, he got really angry.”

“That’s completely unacceptable.”

Will shakes his head. “It’s okay, maybe he just isn’t used to gay people or something. He genuinely seems like a pretty nice guy.” Will sighs. “Not just pretty nice. Pretty and nice.”

Jason gasps. “Will, you didn’t fall for a straight guy, did you? Please don’t tell me you fell for a homophobic straight guy.”

Will’s body stiffens. Then he nods slowly.

“William.”

“Okay, you can shame me later, but what do I do now?” Will says. “I can’t keep going to WcDonalds because it’ll piss him off, but then if I don’t go to WcDonalds, I won’t be able to buy their WcChickens and WcNuggets! You know how much I love their WcNuggets.”

Jason nods solemnly. “WcNuggets are amazing.”

“Even if they are full of trans-fat,” Will says softly.

“Did you say something?”

“Not at all.”

Jason sighs. Maybe he’ll have time to address Will’s unfortunate medical student WcDonalds slander another time, but for now, he has to stick to his priorities. WcDonalds is for The Gays and he won’t allow anyone to take WcDonalds from them, not if he can help it. No one is sure if Marsha P Johnson really did throw the first brick at Stonewall, but if Jason has to hurl the first WcNugget in New Rome, he’ll do it, scholarship be damned.

“Will,” he says, using the voice that Piper calls his Clark Kent voice. “It doesn’t matter what life experiences that boy has gone through. If he’s homophobic, he’s just going to have to get over it. You don’t deserve to feel unsafe because of your sexuality, especially not in a WcDonalds. I mean, everyone knows that WcDonalds is for the gays.”

“You keep saying that, but I’m not sure if it’s true.”

“William Gertrude Solace-”

“My middle name isn’t Gertrude-”

“William Gertrude Rebecca Patricia Solace, WcDonalds is for the gays and it always will be,” Jason says. “Now stop sharing your Wc opinions with me-”

“Nice pun.”

“Thank you. As I was saying, stop sharing your wack opinions with me and tell me this boy’s name.”

Will hesitates for a moment, but then he nods. “Nico. Nico di Angelo.”

“Thank you for telling me.” With a warm smile, Jason rests a hand on Will’s shoulder. “I promise you that you’ll never feel unsafe in a WcDonalds again.”

~...~

Tracking down Nico di Angelo is a simple enough matter when you have The Demigods on your side. Jason and his queer friend group all came to New Rome for university, and they’ve all kept in touch. With their eclectic mix of talents, many of his friends have been able to attain positions of great power — Percy is the swim team’s star athlete, Reyna and Annabeth are battling for the title of valedictorian, and his girlfriend Piper is somehow the head of Kappa Phi Sigma, Sigma Kappa Phi and Sigma Phi Kappa simultaneously. Most importantly, Percy shares a suite with Lou Ellen, who’s said to have dirt on every single person on campus. Almost everyone is scared of her, which means that she definitely has the power to bring Nico di Angelo down. It’s why Jason makes his way straight to Percy’s suite, trying his best to look like a man on a mission. He’s listening to Britney Spears’ Toxic. He’s getting a little too into it.

“Bro!” Percy says excitedly when he opens the door.

Jason shakes his head. “Bro.”

Percy’s sea-green eyes go wide and puppy-like. “Bro?”

Jason clasps his hands together. “Bro.”

Percy gasps. “ Bro.”

“Close the door, weirdos, you’re letting the cold in.” As usual, Lou Ellen is sitting on the couch with her laptop on her legs. Jason makes his way to her.

“Lou Ellen, I need your help.”

Lou Ellen snorts. “Absolutely not.”

“But why?”

“You guys always ask me for help and it always lands me in trouble. The last time I helped you guys counterprank the Stoll twins, they replaced all my bath bombs with smoke bombs. I smelled like Leo Valdez for weeks.”

“That doesn’t sound so bad to me.”

“Well, it smells really bad to everyone else,” Lou Ellen says. 

Jason looks to Percy for confirmation. Percy doesn’t respond, the traitor. 

“Whatever. Leo deserves better than the two of you anyway.”

“Well, that’s your opinion. Point is, I can’t help you. Go bother some other witchy girl, okay?”

At the thought of speaking to Rachel Elizabeth Dare, Jason shudders.

“Look, it’s not just for me. This is a question of campus security.”

“Campus security? Dude, you and your friends are the biggest threat to campus security.”

“Thank you,” Percy says with a smile. Then, his smile wilts. “Oh, wait. Not a compliment.”

“Don’t feel so bad,” Lou Ellen says. “It’s not because you’re a bad person. You’re just too stupid to know better.”

Percy’s face lights up again, but then Lou Ellen’s words sink in. “Why do you always say things like that? And why do I always fall for it?”

“It’s funny,” Lou says. “And you’re stupid, duh.”

“Something homophobic happened at WcDonalds,” Jason says to grab their attention. It works. Percy seems livid, which doesn’t happen very often, but when it does, it’s quite a scary sight to behold. Lou Ellen’s expression is solemn. She clenches and unclenches her fists, a habit that Jason knows is a bit of a nervous tic.

“Tell me more.”

“My roommate Will Solace has been feeling harassed by this guy at WcDonalds. The other guy keeps glaring at him and gets particularly annoyed whenever Will deviates from heteronormativity. It’s gotten to the point where Will is too afraid to go to WcDonalds,” Jason says. “And WcDonalds is meant to be for the gays!”

Percy sighs. “Jason, no matter how many times you say it, WcDonalds isn’t for the gays.”

“But it is!”

“Can’t be for the gays if they hired Octavian’s homophobic ass,” Lou Ellen chimes in.

“Fucking Octavian,” Jason says with an eyeroll.

“Octavian’s the worst,” Percy says.

“To be fair, though, Octavian does seem a little gay.”

Lou Ellen and Percy nod at the wisdom of Jason’s words. Another day, another opportunity to protect the reputation of WcDonalds as a queer sanctuary.

“Still, even though I don’t see a point in supporting WcDonalds, queer people deserve to go wherever they want without fearing discrimination,” Lou Ellen says. “Especially not someone as nice as Will. Tell me, what’s the name of the guy bugging Will?”

“Nico di Angelo,” Jason says. Lou Ellen enters his name in the search bar of her blackmail database. Unfortunately, only one result pops up.

“Nico di Angelo. Sister of Hazel Levesque, but doesn’t have enough friends to make blackmail possible. Classics major, short, kind of goth. Cute too. Pity he has to be so bigoted about it,” Lou Ellen says. “He lives off-campus, so you’ll have to travel to find him, but you probably won’t have any trouble getting the jump on him.”

Jason nods. “You’ll email me the details?”

“Yeah,” Lou Ellen says. “Best of luck on your mission.”

Lou Ellen and Jason share a nod. After a fistbump with Percy, Jason proceeds to his next destination, a smile on his face. Nico di Angelo, just you wait.

~...~

Jason Grace first met Piper McLean during a game of Capture the Flag. For some reason he didn’t understand, Half-Blood High believed that brutal, violent combat was the most effective way of getting their new students to bond, which meant that Capture the Flag was their favourite orientation activity. Being on the track team meant that Jason easily outran almost every person on the opposite team, making him one of his team’s star players. The people he couldn’t outrun were the people he eliminated, easily swiping the socks that were tucked into their pants.

When he finally reached the opposing team’s base, he found a girl waiting for him. Her hair was chestnut brown and her eyes glistened like a pearlescent mirror, filled with colours impossible to name. Jason feinted to the left and then dashed to the right, reaching for the flag. The girl seemed to fall for it, but then she dove and slammed him to the floor, knocking the wind out of him. She swiped the sock from his waist as she did so, her smile wolfish as she rose to look at him.

“You’re good, Grace,” she said, “but not as good as me.”

And from that moment on, Jason had found himself in love with Piper McLean

Jason first met Leo when he was fixing the drink dispenser, of course, but the first time he spoke to Leo was when the other boy was fixing their high school’s computer system. Someone had sent Jason an email with a link to cutepuppies.com, a website that turned out to be filled with viruses. Since he was the only person who really knew anything about computers in their school, Leo had been sent to deal with the problem.

Watching Leo’s ass was one thing, but it was nothing compared to watching Leo when he was truly at work, his fingers dancing across the keys gracefully. His hair was a little dishevelled, but Jason hardly noticed, not when Leo was grinning smugly like a mad scientist. Jason didn’t even know he had a competence kink.

“I’m sorry about the virus, by the way. I hope it’s not too much trouble.”

“It’s cool,” Leo said. “I mean, it’s my virus, so it’s really not a big deal.”

“It’s your virus?” Jason said. “Then why are you getting rid of it now?”

“Because it gives me enough time to do… this.” When Leo pressed CTRL-ALT-DELETE, every computer in the room lit up with a picture of Principal D lounging in a chair, his chest bare. The caption below it read: Now, that’s a DILF. Then, Leo pressed CTRL-ALT-DELETE again and the picture vanished.

“I’ll just tell them that I can’t fix this virus. For the next few months, I’ll keep changing the image again and again so I can keep surprising everyone. I don’t think anyone else can figure out how I did it, so it should be okay.”

Jason bit his lip. “But why are you telling this to me?”

“The same reason why I sent that website link to you,” Leo said, his expression surprisingly shy. “I wanted to get to know you.”

And that was the moment that Jason fell hopelessly in love with Leo Valdez.

If dating both Piper and Leo at once has taught Jason anything, it’s that he has a type. Sure, the two of them have many differences — Piper always takes care of herself while Leo’s perfectly happy streaked in machine oil, Piper loves the rain while Leo loves the sun, Piper hates watching her father’s films while Leo is such a huge fan that he has every single photo from Tristan’s nude photoshoot stuck to his wall (Which means that he has a lot of redecorating to do whenever Piper visits). Still, both of them share a certain insanity, a certain passion for flamboyance and cutthroat action that Jason can’t help but feel drawn to. 

It makes them the perfect partners-in-crime for defacing someone’s house.

The di Angelo household is far more goth than any homophobe breeding ground has any right to be. The house is painted in inky black (what house is painted in inky black?) and the entire front yard has been converted into a mini cemetery. Tiny skulls lie interspersed along the porch’s balustrade. As if to add to the effect, a flash of lightning paints the house in an eerie glow.

“Wow,” Leo says. “This looks like Satan’s house. We could literally be fighting Satan.”

“Ugh, that’s so unfair,” Piper says. “Satan is homophobic too? I thought he was meant to be on our side.”

“Come on guys, let’s not get distracted,” Jason says, his roll of toilet paper already in hand. His partners nod, readying their own rolls of toilet paper.

This isn’t the first house that the three of them have TP-ed, and it won’t be the last. Piper and Leo take the left and right sides of the house instinctively, swinging toilet paper rolls up and across the house and its trees. Jason concentrates on the front of the house, the space that most people probably focus on. He sends a few rolls flying to the second floor balcony. He’s aiming his next roll at the chimney when a head pokes out of a second-floor window. 

The head in question belongs to a boy that’s the splitting image of the eboy wojak. His face is scrunched up with annoyance, but otherwise, it’s actually pretty cute. As he stares at Nico di Angelo, Jason decides not to criticise Will for falling for a straight guy. Some heterosexual faces are just too beautiful to resist.

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re beautiful?” Jason says.

The boy scowls at him. “No.”

“Well, that’s because it’d be a lie!”

“Excuse me?”

Leo gestures at Jason to continue distracting Nico, a can of spray paint in his hand. He begins writing the word “homophobe” in red crimson.

“So, umm, how’s the weather?” Jason offers. Leo sighs, covering his face with his right hand.

“How’s the weather? Who cares when you’re TP-ing my house?”

“I’m not.”

“You are! I can literally see the toilet paper in your hands.”

Jason tosses the toilet paper towards the chimney. Somehow, it enters. Score. “Not anymore.”

Nico bites his lip. “If you don’t leave immediately, I’m calling the police.”

“No, you’re not!” Piper jumps into Nico’s range of vision. “I’m a woman of colour here. If you call the police, you’re endangering me, which means that you support police brutality. Do you support police brutality, Nico di Angelo? Do you?”

“Nice one,” Jason whispers.

“I love you too,” she whispers back.

“McLean, what the hell?” Nico says. “I thought we were cool.”

Piper reels back with a gasp. “How do you even know me?”

“I was at Hazel’s party last week, remember? We spent the entire party shitting on Octavian?”

“Oh, right.” Piper says. “Whatever. That doesn’t count. Shitting on Octavian with other people doesn’t make you friends. Everyone shits on Octavian.”

“I mean, she has a point,” Leo says. “Octavian does suck.”

Nico rolls his eyes. “Fucking Octavian.”

“Yeah, Octavian is literally the worst.”

“Wait a minute,” Nico says. “Who said that Octavian sucks?”

“Umm, everyone?” Piper says.

“No, it wasn’t you, and it definitely wasn’t blonde superman over there.” Nico cranes his neck out of his window. “Oh, fucking hell. Why is that short guy spray painting my house?”

“I’m not short!” 

“Don’t be mad, babe,” Jason says as he pats Leo on the head. “You’re perfect just the way you are.”

“Easy for you to say, blonde superman.”

“Well, if you were too tall, I wouldn’t be able to lift you up against the wall, would I?”

“I love you guys,” Piper says. The three of them stare at each other, eyes adoring. It’s why they don’t notice Nico exiting the house until it’s too late.

“What did you write on my wall?” Nico says, seething with rage. “H… h… how-maphobe?”

“It spells homophobe, idiot,” Leo says with a smirk. 

“Don’t call me an idiot. I’m dyslexic, fuckface.”

“Well, I’m also dyslexic, so that’s really no excuse. Just accept that you’re too dumb to read.”

“No, Leo, I think you actually spelt it wrong,” Piper said. “There isn’t a “w” in homophobe.”

Leo’s face turns pale. “It’s not howmosexual? So that’s why my family kept asking if I was attracted to questions.”

“Well, maybe this can be a teaching moment.” Jason turns to Nico, who still looks like a pissed off hot topic fan. “Nico, you know how it’s homosexual and not ‘how’mosexual?”

“Yes?”

“In the same way, there’s no need to question homosexuality. There’s no need to ask “why” or “how”. Homosexuality just is. There’s nothing wrong with being gay, Nico, and you need to understand that.”

“You’re so smart, babe,” Piper sighs.

“Thank you, babe.”

“Okay, now here’s the thing,” Nico says, resting his forehead on his clasped hands. “You guys clearly think I’m a homophobe, but I’m not.”

“You’re not?” Jason says, his eyes wide.

“I’m not a homophobe!” Nico yells, his teeth gnashed together.

Piper raises an eyebrow. “You seem really agitated right now, though. Are you sure you’re not a homophobe?”

“Yes,” Nico says, seething. “I’m very sure.”

The polyamorous trio takes a few moments to process this.

“I guess I could see a world where you’re not a homophobe,” Piper says. “I mean, you are the splitting image of the eboy wojak.”

“I am not!”

“If you’re really not a homophobe, then ’m really sorry about this,” Jason says, hanging his head. “It’s just… you’ve made my friend really uncomfortable. He goes to WcDonalds, see, and he feels like you keep glaring at him, and though he’s tried to speak to you and thought you were pretty nice and funny, you kept staring at him weirdly whenever he did something gay? And now he’s too scared to go to WcDonalds.”

“Will thinks I’m a homophobe?” Nico says, his eyes narrowed.

“I didn’t say it was Will!” Jason says. “I mean, it could have been a lot of people. A lot of people go to WcDonalds.”

“And do I look like the sort of person that talks to many people in WcDonalds?”

“My friend is… the cashier?”

Nico sighs. All of a sudden, he looks more tired than angry. He begins pacing, muttering a string of curses in italian. Leo, Piper and Jason watch him warily.

Finally, he turns around. “You guys. Come with me.”

“Why?” Jason asks.

“You’ll see.” With that, Nico begins walking down the road back to campus. For some reason, Jason, Piper and Leo follow after him.

~...~

Nico’s first stop is the Barbucks across the street. He walks in with what Jason now realises is the typical Nico di Angelo disposition — with a grumpy glare and a lethargic aura. 

“This place isn’t too mainstream for you, hipster boy?” Piper says with a grin.

“It is,” Nico says. He turns to the cashier. “Caramel Macchiato, please.”

“I can’t believe we’re in a Barbucks right now,” Jason says. “We should be buying drinks from WcDonalds. WcDonalds is the homosexual sanctuary of the world. If you aren’t a homophobe, di Angelo, we should be shopping from WcDonalds.”

Nico frowns at him. “You do know that Barbucks is a gay institution in its own right, don’t you? A love for iced coffee is very common among gay men.”

Jason’s eyes widen. “Really?”

“Hell yeah,” Leo says with a smirk. “Time to turn in your bi card, Grace. Homophobe boy just schooled you.”

Nico shoots Leo a glare, but there’s a small smile tugging at his face. Jason gets the feeling that he might not be so bad after all.

Afterwards, they head over to Winterson & Noble. Nico picks up a few medical textbooks, along with copies of The Song of Achilles, Gideon the Ninth and Boyfriend Material.

“Wait, you can find those books here?” Piper says. “Damn, they’re all on Will’s wishlist. His birthday’s going to be a freaking breeze.”

Nico snorts. “I wouldn’t count on it.”

The final place they go to is, of course, the hallowed halls of WcDonalds. Nico hums some indie song to himself as he places his order digitally, clicking on the WcChicken of all things.

“I can’t believe you didn’t even order the WcNuggets,” Jason says. “They’re the best part of WcDonalds!”

Nico nods. “He always hates eating too much of them, though. It makes him feel unhealthy. Apparently it’s something about trans fat?”

Jason gasps. “You’re ordering food for a transphobic and fatphobic person?”

The smile on Nico’s face is gentle. “No, silly. Now, can you take me to your dorm room?”

Jason turns to look at Piper and Leo. 

“I’m game if you are,” Piper says. “I mean, he’s pretty cute.”

“Same.”

“I didn’t mean it like that,” Nico says with a sigh. “Just take me there, alright?”

After a quick walk with several toilet breaks, Jason leads Nico to his dorm room. Nico knocks on the door and Will opens it.

“Hi Nico,” Will says. He manages a cheerful smile.

Opposite him, Nico seems to have shrivelled up. He resembles some sort of perturbed owl, fluffy in his bomber jacket. It’s almost cute.

“Take this,” he says, thrusting out the Barbucks bag.

“Oh, a caramel macchiato? That’s my favourite, actually. Thank you!”

“I know,” Nico grunts. Then, he thrusts the next bag forward.

“Oh my god, these are all the books I want right now!” Will gasps. “I can’t accept this, Nico. It must have cost so much money.”

Nico shakes his head. “You will accept it. For me.”

“Now, I don’t see any reason why I should listen to you.”

“You thought I was a homophobe,” Nico says simply. “This is my apology.”

He thrusts the next bag towards Will. Will takes it.

“The WcChicken? That’s my favourite as well,” Will says softly.

“I know,” Nico says. 

“How?”

“Because I’m a complete fucking stalker,” Nico says. Then, he smacks himself on the head. “Sorry, just pretend I never said that. I mean, umm, I just guessed? I, uh, thought that these things might fit your taste?”

“And why were you stalking me?” Will says, his eyebrows scrunched together. “Nico, I’m really glad that you’re making the effort to get over your internalised homophobia, but stalking gay people just for kicks isn’t very-”

“Could you give me your hand for a bit?” Nico practically barks. Wordlessly, Will stretches his hand forward. When Nico takes it, his pale face flushes red.

“You’re a huge dumbass, Solace,” he says. Then, to Jason’s surprise, he kisses Will’s hand. “You’re lucky you’re so cute.”

And then Nico sprints away quickly, as fast as his little twink legs can carry him. From where he stands at the door of their dorm room, Will’s face is also flushed, painted a delicate pink.

Leo whistles. “Damn, looks like we really misjudged that one, huh?”

“Go after him, Will!” Piper says, pulling Will out of the dorm. It takes a few moments, but then Will is sprinting after Nico, hot on his heels.

“Do you think Will will catch him in time?” Leo says.

“Oh, definitely,” Piper says. “He’s a homosexual with iced coffee. You can’t stop a homosexual with iced coffee.”

~...~

A week later, Will is trying on different shirts before Jason, Leo and Piper. He eventually settles on a navy button-up, one that brings out the blue of his eyes.

“Do I look slutty?” he asks as he faces the group.

Piper shakes her head. “Not at all.”

Will unbuttons two more buttons. “Do I look slutty now?”

Leo lets out a low whistle as Piper begins laughing. “Go get him, tiger!”

As he watches the fading silhouette of his roommate, Jason can’t help the grin that stretches across his face. Will may be nervous for his first date with Nico, but Jason is sure that wedding bells will be ringing in no time. Yet another win for the queer community, and all because of some WcDonalds magic.

“Hey,” Leo says. “You guys wanna fuck while he’s gone?”

Piper grins. “I thought you’d never ask.”