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Dean Winchester did not brag about his conquests. Sure he would smirk knowingly over at his best friend as he made his way out of a party or bar. And he would grin and shrug unashamedly if his roommate and buddies made catcalls as he walked into the dorm the next morning. But he never gave details like Chuck or constantly reminded everyone of the names he had collected like Benny. Dean Winchester did not kiss and tell. It was something his best friend, Castiel, was always grateful for.
“Winchester, party tonight!” Benny called out as he threw the door to their dorm room open and barreled in like a bull. “Oh, hey, Cas.” His smile dropped just the slightest at the sight of the quiet boy sitting at Dean’s desk before he jerked his attention back to his roommate, not even bothering to extend the invitation to said party. “Ash heard about a party going on over at one of the frat houses. Open invite, brother.” His deep voice coated in a thick cajun drawl.
“Awesome.” Dean grinned from his spot on the edge of his bed, just a few feet away from Cas who had been helping him with homework. “Cas, you gotta join us this time.”
“No thank you, Dean.” Castiel smiled tightly and began to gather his things together.
“Ah come on, you’ve only been to like one party, man, live a little!” Dean slammed his textbook closed and threw his hands up in the air.
“If he don’t want to go, Dean, don’t push him.” Benny mumbled as he collapsed onto his own bed across the room.
Castiel froze in middle of slinging his bag over his shoulder and glanced at the other man before letting out a sigh and pushing the strap further on his shoulder. It was no secret Benny didn’t like Castiel much, his friendship with his roommate was a complete mystery to the other man. Dean had shrugged off Benny’s questions the first weekend of the semester, saying only that they had been friends nearly all their lives and that was that. It didn’t mean that Benny, the guy randomly selected to room with Dean but self-proclaimed friend within minutes of meeting him, had to be friends with Castiel. It did mean that he had to keep his mouth shut about any issues he may have with the smaller, shyer, more studious freshman.
“Come on, Cas.” Dean jumped up to follow Castiel out of the dorm room, shooting a frown at Benny before crossing the threshold into the hallway. Reaching out he spun his friend around to look at him and keeping his grip on the other’s arm to keep him still. “Come on. You need a break from the studying. It’s one party.” He raised his eyebrows and a small smirk tilted his lips. “Maybe you could even find someone to keep you distracted.”
Castiel blushed slightly at the suggestion. Dean knew his best friend was gay, it had never been a secret when Dean had been the first person Castiel had even thought to tell when he realized it himself. Dean had been accepting, much to Castiel’s relief, and had left things at that, neither feeling the need to talk about Castiel’s romantic life, or lack thereof.
“I don’t need someone distracting me.” Castiel mumbled as he shifted the strap of his bag nervously.
“A little distraction can be a really good thing, Cas.” Dean pouted. “Plus, who is going to keep me out of trouble?” He glanced back at his room as if to wordlessly point out that Benny would not be the person for the job.
“Fine.” Castiel sighed and pulled his arm from Dean’s grip. “Let me know what time to be here and I’ll walk over with you.”
“Awesome.” Dean smirked. “You’ll have fun, I promise.” Castiel nodded unbelievingly and left to go to his own dorm in the next building over. He still had homework to finish before the party.
“Dude, is that Cassie from our math class?” Ash said as they paused across the street from the frat house that was doing a poor job of containing the party in progress.
“Yeah it is.” Garth nodded and nudged Dean. “And she has been eyeing you across the room all week.”
Castiel stood on the other side of Dean, not saying anything and shifting from foot to foot with nervous energy at the number of people and the volume of the scene before them. Dean simply shrugged and nudged Castiel as the group made their way across the street and up the hill the house sat on. Within moments everyone had split up to find drinks or talk to people that had caught their eye. Only Dean hesitated, looking at Cas.
“You good, man?”
“Yes, Dean, I am not a child.” Castiel frowned as his eyes swept over the crowd.
“Ok.” Dean laughed and tugged on his friend’s sleeve. “Let’s go get some drinks.” Castiel followed him through people toward the kitchen where most of the alcohol was located and took the drink held out to him.
“Dean?” Both men turned to see who had spoken.
“Cassie, hi.” Dean grinned as he recognized the girl. Castiel had never seen her, since he took a more advanced math course than Dean and his friends, so he took in the sight of her attractive looks, beautifully smooth mocha skin, and thick curly hair. “Uh, this is my friend, Cas.” Dean pointed at the quiet man next to him.
“Oh, hi.” She smiled politely before turning her attention back to Dean. “So, do you want to dance with me?”
“Um.” Dean hesitated, shooting a glance at Castiel.
“Go.” The other man rolled his eyes and nodded.
“Yeah. Sure.” He nodded and followed Cassie to another room, glancing back at his friend once before disappearing.
Castiel spent the night moving slowly from room to room, talking with a few people here and there, getting a fresh drink once, but mostly trying to keep an eye out for Dean. Occasionally he saw his best friend pressed close to Cassie dancing, talking, laughing, and once kissing. It was at that point that Castiel decided to call it a night, figuring at this point he was going to be going home alone anyway. Quickly he shot off a text to Dean as he made his way down the street away from the party, letting his friend know he was going home.
As he lay in his own dorm room later and checked his phone for the tenth time to see no response from Dean, he couldn’t stop his thoughts from straying to all the possibilities of what could keep the other man from answering. He felt horrible when he realized that he was hoping that something bad had happened rather than Dean being caught up in Cassie. He grew sick to his stomach as he thought of the two walking back to her dorm, Dean barley able to keep his hands to himself, her kissing him as she pressed in close outside her room. The kiss would grow heated as Dean would start taking off her clothes and really let his hands wonder, encouraged by any sounds she may make. Everything else would be forgotten, especially his best friend.
***
“Bela herself told me to make sure that you were there.” Ash smirked as he leaned back against the foot of Benny’s bed, staring at Dean who sat across from him, also on the floor.
“I don’t know, brother, she would just as soon devour you alive as sleep with you.” Benny shook his head from his spot atop his bed.
“Yeah, but she is hot.” Ash pointed out as if that was the end of the conversation.
Dean shrugged. “I don’t know man. She can be kinda scary.” He glanced at Castiel out of the corner of his eye who sat reading a book at Dean’s desk.
“So take Cas there as a shield. I’m sure he would keep Bela at bay.” Benny smirked, winking at the shocked look Castiel shot him.
“I do not wish to be dragged into this.” Castiel huffed and turned back to his book. Dean kicked out at his friend’s foot. “No, Dean.”
Dean laughed, catching Castiel’s attention. “Come on, be my bodyguard in case she gets crazy.”
“No thank you.” Castiel frowned and turned back to his book.
“Caaaasss.” Dean whined. “Come on.” He tugged on the other’s wrist. “I know for a fact that you have no class work, work work, or other plans for tonight. Come with us.”
Castiel took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, and Dean had been his friend long enough to know he had just won the argument. He squeezed his friend’s wrist before letting go and jumping up to find something to wear that would empress the girl in question.
A few hours later and Castiel found himself once more standing on the fringes of a party he had no real desire to be at, watching others dancing to an overwhelming beat, talking in small groups, hanging off one another. His eyes strayed once more to the sight of Dean leaning in close to a tall, beautiful brunette. She stood so straight and had spoken with a slight accent when she had introduced herself to Castiel before pulling Dean away, of course Dean was attracted to her.
With a small huffed sigh, Castiel downed the last of his drink. Suddenly Dean glanced his way and Castiel waved in farewell once before turning to leave. He missed the small frown on his friend’s face, the half step toward him before Bela had grabbed his arm, and the disappointment that flashed across his friend’s face as he walked out of the party to head home for the night.
> The text was sent moments later, before Castiel could even get fully away from the noise.
>
The small smile at his friend’s concern had completely faded half an hour later when no response had come and he once more lay alone in a dark and quiet room. His imagination again began to wonder, making him sick as images of Bela taking control once they were alone, pressing her hands to Dean’s chest to move him how she wanted flooded his mind. He would give in, letting her lead the intimate dance as they moved into her room, up to her bed. She would take off his shirt and admire the toned body beneath. He would wrap his hands around her trim waist, reveling in the soft give of her flesh. All concern for his friend would be forgotten as she pushed him onto the mattress and lowered her small body over him.
***
“She is a yoga instructor!” Dean’s excited statement was met with hushing from the librarian and other students actually trying to study.
“Damn brother. You have to take advantage of that.” Benny let out a low whistle, earning a glare from Castiel, who sat across from him.
“If you two are going to insist on talking, you should go back to your room.” Castiel’s voice was nothing more than a whisper, but it still held plenty of force.
“Sure thing, angel.” Benny sneered back, turning back to Dean. “Come on, we can grab some food on the way.”
“Actually, I really need to stay and study.” Dean glanced down at his open books. He and Castiel had been sitting on either side of the cluttered table trying to get work done when Dean’s roommate had lumbered in to tell Dean that Lisa freaking Braeden had been asking about him.
“Ok, but tonight, you will be at the party.” Benny pointed a finger at his roommate as he stood.
“Of course.” Dean grinned. Once the other man was gone, he and Castiel sat in silence for a while, both trying to get through their work. After nearly an hour, Dean was finally done with everything he absolutely had to get done. Letting out a heavy sigh he sat back in his chair and stared at Castiel.
“No, Dean.” He said it without looking up from his French work, taking notes with one hand while looking at a book he had the other on.
“I didn’t say anything.” Dean huffed a laugh as he sat forward, crossing his arms over the table.
“You were thinking very loudly in my direction.” Castiel frowned as he looked up at his now smiling friend. “I am not going to this party with you.”
“But it’s been weeks since you went out with us.” Dean’s voice raised slightly and he was hushed by the same patrons that had quieted Benny. “Come on, I need my wingman.”
“Benny is your wingman.” Castiel pointed out, slowly putting his pencil down. “I occupy you while getting your first drink and waiting for the woman of the week to find you. I’d rather not.” He crossed his own arms to mirror his friend.
“I told you that you should be looking for someone to hook up with, too.”
“And I told you that I don’t need the distraction.” Castiel turned his attention down to his textbook once more. Dean rolled his eyes and sat back in his chair to watch his friend for a moment.
“Fine.” He began gathering his things. “I’ll still see you tomorrow for coffee?” He stood looking down on Castiel.
“Of course, Dean.” Cas waited until he heard Dean walk away before he dared to look up, following the other’s progress out of the library with his eyes.
He thought not going to the party would make it easier to sleep that night, but he was wrong. Again he was kept awake late into the night as visions of Lisa smiling coyly at Dean as they talked and drank floated before him. Castiel had met Lisa, she seemed sweeter than most, so he thought she maybe would draw things out. She would call a cab when she decided she was ready to leave the party, but Dean would shake his head and insist that he was fine to drive. It was an off campus party after all, he would drive his beloved Impala there, and wouldn’t risk getting too drunk that he would risk her. So Lisa would smile shyly, batting her eyes at him and agree with a sweet smile. When they got back to her dorm it would start out with a kiss, just a little chaste thing to thank him for the ride, but it would quickly become more. Soon the car would be thrown in park, the occupants climbing out and making a heated escape to the building instead. It wouldn’t take long before Dean would have her pressed to the closed door of her dorm room, lifting her easily since they were both so fit. In no time at all he would be exploring her many abilities thanks to the wonderful world of yoga. Castiel’s stomach rolled, knowing Dean would not have thought anything of him the whole night.
***
The next day Castiel sat at a small table in a corner of the little cafe he and Dean had discovered when they had toured the campus the year before. He couldn’t believe it had been only a year since they had visited the college together, inseparable up to that point and never questioning their joint attendance at the university. John Winchester, Dean’s father, had left the boys to explore the town as he took Sam to look at some museum nearby. Castiel had wanted to join, but Dean had pleaded his case with desperation to spend time with his friend getting to know places and the promise to visit every museum and art exhibit once they were students. They had found the cafe and knew it would become a new ritual for them, sitting at a table sipping coffee like hipsters.
Castiel sat at that same table for half an hour by himself before he decided that he was being stood up by his best friend, probably for a girl, and began to clean up his mess of sugar packets and nervously mutilated napkins. Just as he was standing to leave, the door to the cafe practically flew open and Dean rushed through, breathing heavily. A relieved smile lit up his face as he wound himself through the tables toward his friend.
“I was worried you would be gone.” He huffed through short breathes. Holding up a finger, he bent double, placing his hands on his knees, and struggled to catch his breath. Finally he stood, taking one last deep breath, and took in the trash in the other’s hand. “Shit. I’m sorry, I’m so late.”
“It’s ok.” Castiel frowned, looking down at his hands as well.
“No, but I will explain in just a minute. I need a coffee, do you want another?” He took a step backward, waiting for some answer from Castiel.
“Sure.”
Dean nodded and walked away to order. Castiel sat back down and waited for the other man to join him, nervously ripping at another napkin that had been unlucky enough to be within reach. When Dean finally sat down in the chair next to him, scooting it a little closer after setting the cups down, Castiel noticed Dean was wearing the same clothes as the night before.
“Long night?” Castiel mumbled as he pulled the hot cup closer. Dean glanced down and back up with a sheepish smile.
“Yeah.” He noticed the pained frown on his friend’s face. “I mean no. Not like that.” He took a deep breath, shifting his body to face his friend. “Ok, let me start again. I was up late last night with Lisa.”
Castiel visibly flinched at the words. His one saving grace had always been that Dean didn’t brag. “I really don’t need the details, Dean.”
“No, you really do. Bare with me, ok?” He was pleading. “So I go to the party and Lisa finds me and she is all flirty and gorgeous and damn near perfect.” Dean smirked but soon dropped it at the look on his friend’s face. “Anyway, we talk and dance and all the usual, but she had a long day and wanted to go home early so I offered her a ride, of course. But when we get back to her dorm and I kiss her, she gets that something is off. And she freaking goes and asks me what’s wrong.” Dean rubbed a hand over the back of his neck refusing to look up at Castiel who he is sure is doing that head tilt of curiosity thing he does. “And I try to blow it off and say nothing, long day, the usual BS, but she isn’t buying it. Instead she keeps picking at it, offers me a beer she had hidden in her room, and another one, and one more, until I finally start talking.” Dean stops, taking a drink from his coffee to give himself a minute.
“What was wrong, Dean?” Castiel’s voice is low, hesitant.
“I tell her how I was a little worried about my friend who never dates and won’t put himself out there. My mind was just pre-occupied, that’s all. Again, she ain’t buying it; it’s too vague.” Dean frowned at the memory of how stubborn Lisa had turned out to be. “And suddenly it’s like I got no filter and can’t stop talking. And all kinds of stuff just spills out.” Dean stops again and finally chances a look at his friend. “We stayed up way too late talking, all of it one huge chick-flick moment. Sammy would be proud.” Castiel smiled slightly. “But she got me thinking about a lot of shit.”
“Like what?” He seemed to be holding his breath now, waiting for more.
“Like I am way to concerned about your dating life. Like maybe I didn’t really want you finding anyone when I got you to go the parties. Like the reason nothing has happened with any of those chicks since we got here is because it’s not them I want.” Dean’s voice was low, forcing Castiel to lean in closer to hear everything. His eyes shot up to his friend’s, blue jerking to meet with green, looking to gauge the truth behind that last statement.
“Nothing happened with Cassie or Bela?” Castiel was whispering back.
“Nope.” It was barely a sound. They were afraid to shatter the delicate nature of the moment. But Castiel heard it. He sat back in his chair, a small breath escaping him as his thoughts were stirred into a frenzy.
All those scenarios, the scenes he was sure were playing out somewhere on campus between his best friend and those girls, they were all in his head. Well, he had known they were his overactive imagination, but no deviation of any of it had taken place at all. Dean Winchester not only didn’t kiss and tell, it seemed he didn’t even really kiss!
Slowly, Castiel let his gaze move back to Dean, who sat back in his own chair, clutching his coffee tightly in shaking hands. Reaching out he took the cup from his friend’s hands, surprised to find it nearly empty already as he set it down on the table next to his own. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
“Who is it that you do want?” His eyes were still squeezed shut as he awaited the answer, so he was completely shocked at the feeling of Dean’s lips on his own. Freezing for a second, he felt a shudder run down his spine before he relaxed into the kiss, letting out a small moan at the feeling of Dean’s fingers on his neck to pull him closer and deepen the kiss.
When they finally pulled apart Castiel couldn’t stop the wide grin at the sight of the blush that covered Dean’s cheeks. Quickly he leaned forward and kissed one of his cheeks, just below his eye, laughing when the blush deepened.
“It was just a kiss, Dean.” He whispered.
“But it was our first one.” Dean whispered right back. Castiel smiled and leaned in to kiss his best friend again.
***
“Well, well, look who showed up.” A friendly voice said from their left before a beautiful brunette with smiling brown eyes appeared in their line of sight. “You must be Cas.” She held out a hand. “I have heard way too much about you.” It was said with a light laugh.
“You would be Lisa?” Castiel asked, reaching out for the woman’s hand as she nodded. “Thank you.”
“Oh it was my pleasure.” She laughed again.
“I doubt that. I was pretty long winded that night.” Dean smirked, his arms tightening around his boyfriend’s waist. They had gone to the party to keep an eye on Garth who had turned out to be a complete light weight, but they were biding their time in an out of the way corner of the living room. Castiel leaned his back against Dean’s chest so both could watch the crowd of people, including their tall, lanky friend who seemed to be entertaining people with a sock puppet of all things.
“Eh, it wasn’t so bad.” Lisa shrugged and took a sip of her drink. She had laid a hand on Castiel’s shoulder and so felt him tense under her grip. Turning she saw Bela Talbot standing across the room leveling a cold smirk at the couple. “Hey, don’t mind her.”
Dean turned to see what the other two were talking about. He lowered his lips to Castiel’s neck, placing a couple kisses there before kissing the side of his ear and whispering. “Look on the bright side, babe. She gets to be the one that is jealous now. And not for nothing.” Dean grinned, seeing the blush creep up the other’s neck at his words.
“Then count me Mr. Brightside.” Castiel turned in his arms and kissed Dean deeply. They heard Lisa’s laugh from a distance and her feint goodbye, but they couldn’t really be bothered. Everything else just faded into the background.