Chapter Text
We were both young when I first saw you
I close my eyes and the flashback starts
I'm standin' there
On a balcony in summer air
JJ sat nervously at the edge of her seat, hands wrapped around a rapidly cooling paper cup of coffee. Something seemed to twist under her ribs as she stared at the cup across from her. Spencer’s cup. Black espresso, six sugars.
"Thank you for ordering for me.” JJ startled slightly and looked up to see Spencer sliding into the chair across from her. A slight sprinkling of stubble lay across his face, and his collar was untucked on one side. She resisted the urge to reach over and straighten it.
"Well, I know your usual by heart.” JJ attempted to smile, but her heart simply wasn’t in it. Naturally, Spencer caught on to the grimace she was attempting to pass for a smile. He leaned over the table, hazel eyes catching and holding hers.
"JJ, what’s wrong? Is it Henry, or Michael?"
“No, no, the boys are fine. I, uh, I-” she picked at the napkin under her coffee cup, shredding it between her fingers. “It's not the boys, it’s Will. We’re separating."
She tried to read Spencer’s expression as he sat back in his chair and drew a breath. His usually expressive eyes suddenly seemed immutable.“Oh, JJ, I am so sorry. Did he do something, did he cheat or hurt you?”
“No, no, nothing like that. He hasn’t done anything wrong. It’s um, it's a mutual separation, for now at least. I don’t feel like I’m able to care about him as deeply as he cares about me.” He tried to catch her gaze but she looked down at her hands on the table.
“Well, that's...” Spencer hesitated, swallowing before he continued, “I’m really sorry, that sounds difficult for all of you. Do the boys know?”
JJ nodded. “We talked to them last night. Naturally, Henry is angry and Michael doesn’t really understand.”
"How about the rest of the team?”
“You’re the first one to know after the boys. You are my best friend after all.” she said with a listless attempt at a chuckle. She could feel her cheeks warming. To her surprise, Spencer reached across the table and wrapped her hands in his. His palms were warm, and the way his hands enveloped hers was soothing to the pain under her ribs.
“Jennifer, whatever you need, I’m here. Hugs, vodka, a shoulder to cry on, help with the boys, bad Chinese food, a place to sleep. What’s mine is yours.”
JJ couldn’t help the tears that sprang to her eyes at his offer, at the tender use of her first name, at the concern crinkling his forehead. Of course her sweet Spence would respond like this, tenderly offering himself as a lifeline in the turbulent sea of a crumbling marriage.
Seeing her eyes welling up, he jumped to his feet and pulled her into his arms. The woodsy scent of his aftershave and the way his arms completely encircled her body made the tears come faster. She buried her face in his chest and breathed him in, seeking solace in his familiar form.
Several long moments seemed to pass before they parted, neither wanting to break the embrace. He quickly offered a napkin for her eyes, and kept a lingering hand on her arm. “You’ll get through this. We’ll get through this, because we’re in this together.”
She nodded, not trusting herself to speak for fear of more tears spilling out. Spencer hadn't moved his hand from her arm, and she didn't attempt to move her arm either.
"Did you have any breakfast today?" he inquired. She shook her head - she had barely been able to swallow her coffee. He gently guided her back to her seat and then went to the counter, bringing back a crinkly brown paper bag.
"A blueberry scone - I remember you saying those were your favorite." A gentle smile played at his lips as he placed it in front of her.
"Of course you do, you never forget anything. Eidetic memory and all that." She returned his smile, the ache under her ribs dissipating further. She broke off a small piece of the scone and popped it into her mouth. It tasted like comfort, like how Spence felt when he held her.
"Well in the 13 years that I've known you, minus the time they stole you away to the Pentagon, we have gone out to breakfast together - on average - approximately 2 times a week. Out of these times, you have told me you prefer blueberry scones over blueberry muffins on average -" he caught himself and paused, smiling as she giggled. “Yeah, I remembered you like blueberry scones.”