Chapter Text
“That feel when no gf.” That’s the line that started it all. The line that had many questioning the sanity of one Tanaka Ryuunosuke and Nishinoya Yuu. They were changing in the club room before afternoon practice began, and the bald headed male started up a conversation on his scores on “Love Live”. Nishinoya instantly responded with a better score, his gloating smile egging Tanaka on before they both sighed.
“That feel when no gf.” Ah, there it was again. The fated line that brought everyone’s attention to the two boys slumped against the locker, already dressed (for once).
“What did you just say, Tanaka?” Daichi inquired, a fine eyebrow perched up at the weird saying his fellow team mate just uttered.
“That feel when no gf?” He repeated and the others shot the two baffled looks.
“What does that even mean?” Kageyama frowned, trying to understand the weird lingo his sempais had amongst them.
“It’s a meme.”
“What’s a meme?” Hinata jumps into the conversation, already (ironically but not surprising) hopping up and down like a baby crow. Tanaka and Nishinoya pretend they don’t see the fond look Kageyama directs at the jumping boy. They also pretend they don’t feel a pang of longing in their chests.
“Like something cool.” Nishinoya puffs out his chest, trying to hide the fact that even he doesn’t know the definition of what a “meme” was.
“Ok, but is this “meme” safe?” Sugawara butts in, a worried frown on his delicate features. Ever the mother hen, Sugawara unconsciously scoots closer to the first years, as if about to cover their ears if any of this “meme” talk became bad. Tanaka rolls his eyes as Daichi orders all of the team to stop slacking and run to the gym. Hinata excitedly launches question after question towards poor Nishinoya while a snickering Tsukishima and Yamaguchi lag behind.
“What other memes are there?!” Hinata bounces up and down and would have possibly flew away if Kageyama had not placed a firm grip on his (boy)friend. Tanaka joins them as the team begins to stretch and warm up for the practice.
“A lot.” Nishinoya responds with a nonchalant shrug as he stretches his arms to his toes. Hinata’s eyes are gleaming with respect and awe towards the two troublemakers as they continue stretching.
“Like?! How do I become a memer?!” Kageyama actually groans at his best friend’s loud exclamation and Tsukishima openly guffaws at the question. Sugawara looks like he’s about to finally turn into the old man he was destined to be with all the worry lines on his forehead (it was the gray hair). Daichi sighed. Asahi’s foot was inching closer to the doors, his eyes trained on the captain’s face.
“One does not simply become a memer.” Tanaka sagely replies, Nishinoya nodding with a grim expression on his face. Tsukishima almost busts a gut from all the laughter spilling out of lips as a frantic Yamaguchi frets over his best friend.
“What-”
“Ok! Warm up is over! We’re going to start running laps now! Stop slacking off, Tanaka, Nishinoya!” The captain bellows loudly, immediately halting all of the words about to spew out of the teenagers’ mouths. Everyone is quickly silenced as they jog outside of the doors to begin running laps lest they anger their captain further. As they’re running, Tanaka notices how Nishinoya practically glued himself to the ace’s side, chattering away about his games while said ace uncomfortably tried to make some space between the two.
“Oh, young love.” Tanaka sighs as he jogs easily, watching Hinata and Kageyama start up another competition before they take off. Tsukishima mumbles something to Yamaguchi and they both snicker to themselves.
“Tanaka,” the captain jogs up to him, “another five laps after the three laps we’re doing. Same to you Nishinoya.” Daichi directs to the libero and Nishinoya groans loudly.
“I came out to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling attacked right now.” Nishinoya sighs loudly, Tanaka agreeing easily with his words.
“Shall I make it ten laps?” The raven smiles menacingly at the two friends and Asahi meeps before basically running away like the devil is on his heels (Daichi or even Nishinoya in this case). At the captain’s suggestion, Nishinoya and Tanaka shut their mouths and exchange amused looks. They pretend to not notice the way Daichi and Sugawara brush against each other now and again, and the loving looks on their faces whenever the other isn’t looking. Tanaka pretends to be distracted by Kiyoko, when really, he notices how everyone on the team were paired up except for him.
“There are troubling times in the kingdom.” He ominously whispers to himself.
“What was that, Ryuu?” Nishinoya snaps out of his besotted daze from gazing at the team’s ace. Tanaka swallows a sigh and the rest of his bitter feelings.
“Nothing, man.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
It’s later in practice when the team is working on their serves and receives when the talk of memes come up again. Daichi exasperatedly sighs but knows he cannot stop the memes if he wanted to. Sugawara pats his shoulder, his hand staying on the captain’s five seconds longer than necessary. They both ignore their repressed feelings.
“Teach me, Nishinoya-sempai! Teach me rolling thunder!” Hinata begs and practically throws himself at the shorter’s feet in desperation.
“Oi! Idiot!” Kageyama snaps harshly at his best friend but it’s in vain. Hinata’s focus is solely on Nishinoya.
“Ain’t nobody got time for that.” Tanaka proudly and loudly proclaims. Nishinoya bobs his head up and down in agreement while a crestfallen Hinata pathetically scuffs the ground with his feet. Kageyama glares at both of them. They “eep” in sync while Hinata stares at the volleyball longingly, already forgetting about his rejection.
“I was just joking, Shouyo! Let your reliable sempai teach you “rolling thunder”!” Nishinoya pats the decoy’s shoulder harshly, nearly throwing the poor first year on the ground. Kageyama immediately helps up his best friend, his hand staying on the orange head’s hip.
“Aww, look! The king is looking out for his queen!” Tsukishima loudly teases, a smirk on his face. Yamaguchi giggles and hides his smile behind his fingers. Kageyama responds with a withering glare. It would have been more terrifying, if not for the scarlet painted on his cheeks.
“S-Shut up!” The setter yells, throwing his hands off of Hinata like he’s been burned. Hinata, ever the oblivious one, questioningly stares at his raven friend, wondering why Kageyama was completely red.
“Forever alone.” Tanaka starts up again and Nishinoya elbows him jokingly in the gut.
“Nah, bruh. Why you so negative?”
“Because I’m an electron.” Tanaka thanked social media for the witty comeback, and judging by Nishinoya’s deadpan, the shorter understood too.
“Are you fucking kidding me, bro?”
“You mad, bro?”
“Bro.”
“Baldy and Shorty! Get back to receiving!” Ukai yelled at the two and they both laughed before returning to the practice for the day. As they were waiting in line for their turn to serve, Tanaka gestured towards Kiyoko, who was chatting with a laughing Yachi. Nishinoya followed his gaze and locked onto Kiyoko.
“I crave that mineral.” Nishinoya whispers like a broken, dehydrated man who finally stumbled upon an oasis. Tanaka joins him in his weeping.
“Hey, Tanaka, watch ou-!” Ennoshita hollers but it’s already too late. The damage has already been done. Tanaka’s eyes grow wider as things begin to go in slow motion. The volleyball is flying towards him with amazing speed and the bald headed man knows he won’t be able to dodge it in time. In his last moments, he smirks at his pun, thinking, I can’t doge it in time. OHHHHH.
“Ryuu!” Nishinoya screeches, falling to his knees dramatically as he pulls out his ipod and begins playing “Mmm Whatcha Say”. Tanaka shuts his eyes, feeling his whole life flash before him. He blearily opens them to stare at the devastated sorrow in his best friend’s eyes.
“Tell my wifi, I love her.”
“Don’t you mean wife?” Someone that sounded suspiciously like Tsukishima snickering, asked.
“No, my wifi.” Tanaka breathed out before shutting his eyes completely and letting the pain settle into his throbbing head.
“The feels, man.” Nishinoya sobs and begins throwing his fists against the ground.
“Oh my god.” Sugawara sounds like he’s about to throw up from all his laughing and Tsukishima isn’t doing any better. He’s laughing more than he’s ever before and Tanaka doesn’t know whether to feel offended or proud.
“Get up, baldy!” Daichi harshly kicks at Tanaka’s side, a killer smile etched on his face. Everyone disbands quicker than Zayne from One Direction and basically throws their teammate under the bus. Tanaka groans and opens his eyes once more, blinking a few times to adjust to the bright gym lights. Daichi’s glowing form reminded him strongly of a fallen angel, and Tanaka quickly jumped to his feet.
“I’m revived!”
“Ryuu!” Nishinoya pounces on him in a totally heterosexual way as they cling to each other.
“No bromo.” Tanaka whispers to his friend. Nishinoya nods in his chest as they embrace each other and cry. Sugawara manages to hold back the captain from completely murdering their asses with the broken broom they kept.
“If you don’t stop goofing around, I swear to god, I will make you run laps across the fucking country. Now, get back to practice!” Daichi yelps out the last part and storms away, his Karasuno jacket fluttering behind him like an emperor’s cape. Sugawara rolls his eyes at his dramatic (boy)friend and follows after him.
“Well, that escalated quickly.” Nishinoya and Tanaka voice out loud at the same time. They grin like idiots at each other and high five before running back to practice before Daichi could chew them out.
“Tanaka-sempai! Are you okay?” Hinata scurries over to them and worriedly glances at the bump on Tanaka’s head. The bald man grins and jabs a thumb against his chest.
“Fear not, orange one! I won’t fall that easily!” He begins laughing loudly, Nishinoya joining him as their cackles echo through the gym.
“Waaah! So cool!” Hinata jumps up like he’s about to do the freak set and lands on his feet with stars in his eyes. Kageyama looks torn between dropping the volleyball to go yell at Hinata or continue practice.
“It’s blood orange.” No one hears Tsukishima whisper to Yamaguchi or the giggles that follow afterwards.
“Oh my god, Tsukki.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
By the time practice is over, the duo of meme trash are hanging out in the club room, changing into their normal clothes and chatting about their ships.
“Ok, but Rinharu is totally canon.” Nishinoya shoots an offended look at Tanaka as he strips off his shirt.
“Um, no. Keep calm and ship Makoharu.” They both glare at one another as they change their pants at the same time. Daichi sighs and rubs his forehead tiredly, Sugawara already helping by massaging his captain’s shoulders.
“Sure, Jan.” Tanaka scoffs and closes his locker door. Tsukishima rolls his eyes from the back, already dressed and slouched against the lockers as he waited for his freckled friend. Yamaguchi laughs at a joke Hinata cracks while Kageyama and Tsukishima flinch, both denying the bubbling bitter feeling rising in their chests.
“Ok, but hear me out. Shark boy and dolphin boy were made for each other.” Nishinoya continues on the ship rant as the team walks outside after locking up the club room. They were on the obligatory trip to Ukai’s store to buy meat buns and maybe some popsicles since the weather was starting to become warmer. Tanaka debated on whether or not to strip off his shirt (for the ladies) but decided not to when Daichi glared at him.
“Yeah, no. Left shark isn’t going anywhere near dolphin boy.”
“Yeah, well your fave is problematic.” Tanaka gasped at Nishinoya’s harsh, stinging words.
“You take that back, man!”
“No way! Your ship is deader than Edward Elric’s mom!” Another sharp intake. Meanwhile, the rest of the team is pretending not to know them (minus Hinata who looked ready to jump over to his sempais if he wasn’t held back by Kageyama).
“Bruh!” The two were silent after that, both glaring at one another.
“Oh, thank god.” Someone voiced the team’s thoughts at the silence from both loud mouths. Daichi glared warningly at Tanaka and Nishinoya before they all headed into the store for the usual meat buns and maybe even ice cream.
“At least we can agree on one thing.” Nishinoya quietly mentioned. Tanaka met his best friend’s eyes as they both said the same thing at the same time.
“Reigisa.”
“Fuck.” Kageyama mumbles as his sempais start up another loud conversation of whatever this “reigisa” was. He exchanges irritated glances with his captain and they both shake their heads at each other with a heavy sigh.
“What is air?!” Tanaka screeches from the back of the store as he’s guffawing loudly with Nishinoya literally draped against him and shaking with laughter.
“Goddammit.” Tsukishima sums up the whole situation pretty well. Ukai demands they leave before they scared away the customers and the team exits the store with as much pride they could muster.
“Ne, ne! What’s reigisa?” Hinata, the unfortunate victim, decides to ask the laughing sempais.
“It’s a metaphor.” Tanaka waves the first year away with another round of chuckles and Nishinoya joins him, the two swaying back and forth like drunk hippos. Sugawara herds Hinata back into the sane part of the team before the younger one could utter another word.
“Ok, but like. Hi, I’m auditioning for Rei Ryugazaki and I’ll be singing “Butterfly” from DDR.” Nishinoya laughs at his own joke and Tanaka follows soon after. Tsukishima snorts from the back of the group as he eats a popsicle.
“They are not getting any meat buns.” Daichi childishly remarks and Hinata springs up and asks loudly if he could have the two extra ones instead. The captain shrugs and tosses the young one the buns, Hinata catching one with his mouth and the other with his hands, his cheeks puffing out much like a chipmunk’s.
“Hey! That was my meat bun!” Tanaka caught wind of the traitorous acts behind Nishinoya’s and his noble backs and instantly stomped over to the team that walked a few meters away.
“You were slacking off the whole day, Tanaka.” Daichi reprimands, chewing his meat bun slowly and torturing the bald man.
“Did you eat yours yet, Asahi?!” The ace freezes in his actions, his remaining half of the meat bun about to enter his mouth.
“Asahi. Finish it.” Daichi icily commands and Asahi gulps before shoving the meat bun in his mouth and weakly smiling at a pouting Nishinoya. Alarm bells ring in Sugawara’s and Daichi’s heads as Nishinoya’s pout turns into a devilish smirk.
“Nishinoya, no.” Sugawara gasps.
“Don’t believe me, just watch.” Nishinoya sings (badly). The libero doesn’t even hear the setter’s words as he uses Asahi’s tie to pull the taller one down and planted his lips firmly against the other’s.
“WHOA! NISHINOYA-SEMPAI AND ASAHI-SAN ARE KISSING!” Hinata screeches and Sugawara is quickly by his side, shielding the innocent decoy’s eyes. Nishinoya licks his lips after he’s done and beams at Tanaka like a predator who finally caught his prey. Asahi’s red down to his neck and hasn’t moved (or even breathed) for the past two minutes. Tanaka nods a job well done and adds a thumbs up as a bonus.
“I’m surrounded by homos.” Tsukishima declares.
“But, Tsukki, we’re da--”
“Shut up, Yamaguchi.” Daichi clears his throat, a slight blush on his tan face as he faces his team members.
“We’ll be heading this way. See you guys tomorrow.” The captain pulls a petrified Asahi with him, Sugawara smiling warmly at them all before heading in the same direction as his friends.
“Wow. Such kiss. Much awkward.” Tanaka elegantly explains their silent situation.
“I’m going to kill him.” Kageyama mutters and Yamaguchi and Hinata hold the setter back before he’s sent to jail. They kind of need him for the upcoming Interhigh.
“Don’t be upsetti, have some spaghetti.”
“I’ll fucking kill him, just watch me!”
“Kageyama, no!”
“Kageyama, yes.”
“You’re not helping, Tsukki--oh my god! I don’t think I can hold him any longer!” Yamaguchi yelped. At this point, no one else was left except for the first years and Tanaka and Nishinoya. Tsukishima rolled his eyes and drowned out all the noise with his headphones.
“Hoe don’t do it.” Tanaka yelped as a rage filled Kageyama charged towards him. Hinata pulled Kageyama back, the setter’s arm planted firmly against the decoy’s chest. The raven instantly stilled, red beginning to sprout over his face. Hinata whispered something into the setter’s ears and, with an angry huff, Kageyama kicked at Tanaka before heading back over to Hinata’s abandoned bike. The decoy quickly followed, the two whispering amongst themselves.
“Oh my god.”
“Eew, gross. Get a room, king.” The intimate whispers between the two escalated and Kageyama and Hinata were now in an intense wrestling match with their tongues. Yamaguchi quickly turned away, unknowingly burying his face into his best friend’s chest. Tanaka wolf whistled and pointed at the making out first years.
“Woot, woot! Go and get some, Yams!” Nishinoya announced through his cupped hands. The two lovebirds separated with a light smack of their lips, Tsukishima grimacing at the sight as he dragged his boyfriend--I mean, best friend away from the idiotic team members. Yamaguchi happily let himself be dragged by his hand as the two interlaced their fingers and walked away.
“Wait, Kageyama, where are we--?” Hinata exclaimed as he was dragged away by his new blushing boyfriend.
“Shut up, dumbass!” Kageyama snapped, which started up another round of bickering as the two walked away, shoulders brushing each other. As their backs grew smaller and the setting sun disappeared altogether, Nishinoya faced Tanaka.
“Well, that was an eventful day.”
“More memes tomorrow?”
“More memes tomorrow.” Silence.
“It’s not a phase, mom.”
“Oh my god.”