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hongjoong has noticed that when he's out with his hwa or hyungs, he'll see an occasional child (even sometimes puppy hybrids) begin to throw a fit if they don't get what they're asking for.
now, at first, he ignored it. he's a good boy- whenever he behaves well, hwa will let him pick 1 item that he would like in the whole store; which could take a good hour depending where they are.
but he's also noticed that some parents/ guardians will just give those who are throwing said fit what they are asking for, which immediately makes his ears perked up in interest.
if hongjoong acts out in public, will he be given what he's want just to stop? he curiously wants to try that out.
he decides to do it when it's yeosang and jongho watching the kitten- the pair go up and down the aisles, hand in hand as they watch hoongjoong look around the store with the biggest eyes.
he feels a little wrong doing this, but there's no harm in what he's planning in his little mind. he scans the aisles, not really sure what he would want. he passes by the toys, all the bright and colorful objects don't really speak to him. they even pass the candy aisle, not really a fan of sweets as sometimes it makes his teeth hurt.
he looks over to his hyungs- yeosang is by the appliances, debating on which new coffee maker would make his dreams come true. his jongho hyung is standing next to him but also keeping an eye out for the kitten.
he began sulk, shuffling his feet as he walks back to the shopping cart- until he passes an aisle.
he sees a bunch of cat toys and treats and even beds. for some reason it's beckoning him over. just as he steps foot, he feels a hand stop him gently on the shoulder.
"where are you going, joong?" asks jongho
hongjoong points to the pet aisle, eyes already forming the infamous puppy dog look. "wan' go there..."
yeosang joins them not a moment later, he must've heard what the younger said as he leans over jongho's ear. "I don't think he's ever been to this store before, let him look before we leave."
jongho sighs, but smiles nonetheless as he lets the kitten guide the couple to the awaited aisle. they don't comment, but they both have smiles adorned on their face as they watch him waddle to where he wants to look.
hongjoong gasps in amazement. the stores in their area don't have this many toys and other cool stuff. he's remember from yeosang to be careful as he sees his head turn left to right, afraid he'll get whiplash.
the couple let the kitten do what he wants to do, unaware of what will happen in a few minutes. hongjoong doesn't have many cat toys- prefers the ones he has now- but he stops dead in his tracks when he sees some plush toys.
a white cat plush toy wrapped in a blue blanket. hongjoong reaches to grab it, already loving how soft it is. he immediately fell in love with it because he loves how much it looks like him.
now he definitely wants this toy. he clutches it to his chest, going back to his hyungs.
"sangie, jongie...wan', p'ease?" he looks at them with his puppy dog eyes for emphasis.
yeosang immediately wants to say yes! because it's so cute! but a hand on shoulder stops him.
"I don't know how hwa will feel...remember what he said?" jongho tells him, eyebrow raised
yeosang sighs, crossing his arms in defeat. how can he forget? hwa mentioned that joong hasn't been the best listener this past week and doesn't want him to be rewarded by getting toys.
"I knowww, but seriously, jong, it's so cute!" jongho just shakes his head.
"you know what hwa said...joong, we can't get the toy right now. you have to wait to see what your hwa has to say."
hongjoong deflates, lowering the toy from his chest. his eyes start to water as he tries to reason with his hyungs. "b-bu'...I wan' it...p'ease?"
"no, hongjoong, you can't have the toy right now" it hurts jongho to say it, doesn't want to look like the bad guy. yeosang watches with his eyebrows drawn in, hates seeing the kitten grow upset.
at first, hongjoong was just going to pretend to throw a tantrum, but now since his hyungs told him no- his most beloved hyungs- he really feels on the verge of one.
his cheeks grow wet from the tears cascading down his face, he grips the toy closer in defense. "no! wan' kittie..."
yeosang tries to reason, doesn't want a small little issue to escalate into something big. "joong, honey, we can't get the toy now, i'm sorry. you have to put it away."
hongjoong begins to stomp his foot "no!" he mumbles over the plush toy.
jongho sighs "if you don't put it back, I'll take it away and we'll go straight home." he holds eye contact with the younger.
hongjoong falters a little. doesn't like how mean his jongie hyung sounds. but he doesn't want to go home! he wants the toy kitten!
he runs over to yeosang, pleasing with his red tear-rimmed eyes. "sangieeee...p'ease, wan' kittie"
yeosang feels a small pang in his chest as he crosses his arms. "you heard your jongho hyung, go put the toy away, please"
hongjoong crumbles in defeat. he doesn't understand why his hyungs are being mean and not letting him get the toy. he crumbles on the floor, still refusing the let go of the toy.
"wan' hwa..." his voice grows wetter by the second.
"and hwa will tell you the same thing, come on joongie, put the toy away" jongho tries to ease the tension with a nickname.
there isn't many people in the store, which the older pair are grateful for, the last thing they would want is a crowd as they gather around the scene.
hongjoong stands up, albeit stumbling a little, as he stomps to put the toy back on the shelf. he makes sure the plush is secured in its blanket as he strokes the soft fur.
he has his arms crossed as he still has tear tracks on his face. he follows his hyungs as they go to pay for what's in the cart. it hurts his heart to walk away from the toy, feeling his chest tighten.
"jongie, p'ease...wan' kittie...p'ease ge' kittie" he begs one last time, pulling on his jacket sleeve in one last attempt. yeosang is paying for the coffee maker, so jongho is his last attempt.
jongho tells him with a calm voice "hongjoong, no more. maybe next time, you can have the toy. but right now, I'm telling you no."
hongjoong can't handle the rejection, his eyes cloud with unshed tears as he keeps his head down. he feels something bubble in his chest, it makes him feel a little scared.
but he just wants the toy before they leave the store!
as the trio walk back to the car, jongho puts the paid items in the trunk, while yeosang wrestles with putting on hongjoong's seatbelt. he's thrashing in his spot, doesn't want to leave without the toy.
"hongjoong, enough, honey, we're going home now. you need your seatbelt on." yeosang tries to keep his voice at ease, but even himself is growing a little impatient at hongjoong's behavior.
the whole time hongjoong is dodging the seatbelt chanting "no! no! no!"
yeosang tries one last time, but hongjoong grows more agitated; he doesn't realize he's flailing his arms that he accidentally hits yeosang on the shoulder, and from his face- pretty hard.
the older had to walk away, ignoring the kitten's pleas of his name. jongho appears not a second later, he goes to buckle hongjoong in. he makes sure it's not too tight or pulling before he closes the car door.
hongjoong feels that ugly feeling come back and so he starts kicking his legs as more tears fall from his face. while he feels mad about the toy, he also feels upset more at himself for hurting his sangie.
the couple close their eyes for a second to catch their breath before jongho turns around in his seat. "park hongjoong! that is enough! you need to take a breath and relax. we are not getting the toy. don't make me tell seonghwa how you are acting"
that immediately makes hongjoong silence his cries and lower his legs. he's definitely not a fan of hearing his full name, he's only heard his hwa use it once maybe twice- but to hear it from someone other than hwa made him realize his actions.
he hurt his sangie hyung and now he thinks they are mad at him. he hid his face in his sleeve out of embarrassment. he feels bad that he acted that way.
hongjoong doesn't really understand why he was so attached to that toy, but he felt like it was made for him. so when he was told he couldn't have it, he didn't really know how to control his emotions; which resulted in him hurting yeosang.
the whole car ride is silent, except for the small sniffles the kitten tries to hide. it hurts both jongho and yeosang to hear but to save him the embarrassment, they let him sit and cool off.
-
the whole car ride, hongjoong was punishing himself. he hasn't been acting like a good boy lately, and now he knows for a fact that when he goes home, he's gonna sit on the step.
dread hits him when jongho pulls in the driveway and he sees hwa's car. when yeosang opens the back door, hongjoong keeps his head lowered as he lets his hyung unbuckle him.
when he stands up, he immediately whimpers as he sniffs yeosang's neck for comfort. "s-sangie...I sorry"
he's shaking a little as he does his best to nuzzle against his hyung. yeosang wraps his arms around him, rubbing his back as jongho rounds the car.
"jong..." yeosang sighs, eyes motioning between him and hongjoong.
jongho sighs, bringing his hand up to place on his head, his thumb stroking softly between the locks. "joong...how are you feeling?"
"I no' goo' boy...hwa no happy" he mumbles, voice thick with sadness.
"hongjoong, honey, come, let's go inside." yeosang directs the younger into the house. he can hear the t.v on at a low volume when seonghwa passes the kitchen archway.
he pauses in his step. "what happened?"
hongjoong crumbles further, curling in on himself as he escapes yeosang's arms and practically runs away from his spot.
"hongjoong, wait-"
"what happened?" seonghwa cuts yeosang's mid-sentence. before he goes to comfort his baby, he needs to find out what happened.
"well, everything was fine. he wanted to go look at the cat toys so we let him." yeosang continues "he really really wanted a toy, but we told him no because of what you told us and then he started throwing a tantrum."
"it wasn't too bad" jongho adds "but in the process of putting his seatbelt on, he hit yeosang. I didn't want to but I had to raise my voice at him, I feel really bad at doing that, I apologize-"
seonghwa raises his hand up. he took a deep breath as he nodded "it's alright, I'm not mad at you guys. I apologize myself that he acted like that. at home or at school...I need to find out what's going on, but for now. I need to see if my baby is okay."
the couple nod in understanding. after a few more minutes of discussing how hongjoong was behaving, jongho and yeosang leave, with promises that they'll come and visit again.
it's quiet in the room when he closes the front door. he walks around calling joong's name, but stops when he's near the staircase.
he sees hongjoong sitting on the step, face buried in his lap. his shoulders are visibly shaking as he lets out mewls of distress.
seonghwa feels a pang in his chest as he walks up to the kitten, sitting criss cross in front of him. "baby..."
hongjoong just shakes his head, his cat ears are pressed down in fear. he refuses to look up, even when he's called by petnames.
"hongjoong, my baby, why are you sitting on the step?" seonghwa places his hand on his knee, rubbing his thumb to help soothe his nerves.
hongjoong falters, slowly places a shaky hand on top of seonghwa's. "I ba' boy...no' ni'e to sangie...ba' boy sit on s'yep..."
"oh sweetheart, you're shaking...come to hwa, please, baby"
hongjoong lifts his head up, finally looking up at seonghwa. he sees his gentle soft eyes, practically inviting him in as he held his arms out.
"come, my honeybear" and just like that, hongjoong throws himself in seonghwa's arms. he lets out the loudest wails as he clings onto his hwa like a lifeline.
seonghwa holds him tightly in his arms, rocking him back and forth as he pats his bottom. "shh, baby. let's breathe together, you're alright, my love."
seonghwa places the kitten's hand on his chest, slowly beginning to take some deep breaths in and out. it's hard for hongjoong, at first he takes some shaky breathes. he shakes his head as he goes to bury himself back in hwa's neck.
the older takes his hand again, taking deep breaths as he rocks the kitten in his arms. he walks around the room slowly so hongjoong can feel his chest rising and relaxing with the breathes he's taking.
"it's okay, my sweet honeybear, hwa is here for you. we're going to work on this together."
seonghwa goes to sit on the couch, the kitten clinging onto him. he lays his hand flat on his back, kissing his forehead over and over again.
"jongie and sangie told me what happened at the store..."
hongjoong tensed a little, he had completely forgotten all about the plush toy; and also the tantrum he threw.
"now, I want you to understand why you didn't get the toy. lately you haven't been using your listening ears, at home with hwa and in school. I'm going to be honest with you, although I'm not sure if you will fully understand, that if you get a toy when you haven't been making good choices, that's going to teach you that you can get whatever you want by acting out." he pauses for a moment, giving the younger a moment to try and process what he's been told.
"sangie told me that you also hit him" seonghwa continues "you have to remember, baby, to use your words. trust me when I say I understand it can be hard sometimes. but I want you to try, and if you really can't, it's okay. I'm not going to be upset or mad at you, I never will be."
while seonghwa is talking, hongjoong sits up and looks at his hwa. he grabs onto his hand as seonghwa finishes.
"now I don't ever want to hear you call yourself a bad boy. don't you dare ever call yourself that! If you do something that you weren't supposed to, that doesn't make you a bad boy; it just means you didn't make a good choice."
seonghwa cups his face, moving his curly bangs out of his eyes. "my oh so precious sugarplum, I love you so much and I will always be here to guide you. If you need help, you come right to me, baby. hwa will always be here to help you." he strokes his pudgy cheeks with his thumbs "hwa isn't mad or upset with you, but I want you to try to use your listening ears, alright? can you try for hwa?"
hongjoong nods, cheeks smushed together as seonghwa places a big smooch onto both cheeks.
"you know, it made hwa feel sad seeing you put yourself on the step. you may have not been listening to your hyungs, but please don't ever punish yourself like that, that really hurt me."
"h-hwa...I sorry" hongjoong stared for a moment before he slowly began to blink his eyes at the older.
"I accept your apology" seonghwa answers, blinking his eyes slowly back at him. "hwa will help you if you're struggling, I promise. no one is going to harm you, my love."
hongjoong faintly began to purr as he nuzzled against hwa's chest. he lets out a rumble of excitement when hwa places his pacifier in his mouth. seonghwa rubs slow circles into the younger's back to help soothe his nerves.
he still isn't sure what has made hongjoong been acting like this, but he promises he's going to find out no matter what it takes.