Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

♡ Part I: Budding Romance ♡

There were not many places that you felt were inherently safe, having been on your own at a young age, it was difficult to find any sense of belonging. There was one place that you could always turn to though, the library in the center of your small city in Asgard, of Cristatus.

It was, unfortunately, much too small for someone with such a large appetite for reading adventures, and you seemed to be one of the few that did, considering you rarely had any issue borrowing any book nor did you happen upon anyone else reading here beside its librarian.

As you entered the small building once more, you looked around hoping that perhaps you had overlooked a book or two without realizing it. "Already read you... you too Sherlock Holmes… yep… and that one too." You had read the entire section of books from Midgard, you went on to the other few shelves of fiction but still, you had read them all, as there weren’t many written that weren’t myths or legends.

Frustrated, you huffed, then walked quickly to the other end of the room to the only books you still had yet to read. Non-Fiction. You’d read biographies and stories of history, but now all that was left was...

"How to be a Warrior in 20 years." You said aloud as you held it in your reluctant fingers. Asgardians lived for thousands, but you were much different than the rest, strong in your own right, yet very fragile in comparison to them.

Anyway, it did not matter, you had a book that would mildly amuse you, so you walked to the librarian behind a wooden desk to check out the book. 

"Hello Sir Beamer, I'm just going to take this one if that is alright." You smiled, then slid the book in front of him.

Sir Beamer was a peculiar fellow, he had thin grey hair, was very skinny, and had beady brown eyes. He looked at the book with a judgmental stare, then glanced up at you. "This one?"

"Yes." You nodded, and pushed the book a bit closer to him for him to stamp.

"But Maiden, this is a book about becoming a warrior." He told you with condescension, as if you didn't know.

"I'm aware." You said, as you felt your patience start to drain the longer you spoke to him. "With all due respect, I do not need to explain my choices in books to you."

"Very well." He sighed and stamped the inside cover with the symbol of your city, two peacock feathers crossing each other in an 'X'.

"Thank you." You said politely, as was your nature to be kind if it could be helped. You then took the book and left the library.

You walked back home with somewhat of a merry heart because of your small find. At least you had something to do now.

Around you was the golden sun beginning to set on the shining realm of gilded aesthetic perfection, which you admired as you arrived at your modest home and entered through the front door, heading for your room.

You sat on your bed and sighed before you opened your new book and began to read it.

A warrior fights more than just the demons of the realm, a true warrior must protect Asgard and its people with every drop of sweat. The following is a chart of the diet you must keep and the exercises you must do.

Your eyes started drooping in boredom. There was no fascinating detective, family conflict, romantic interest, nothing. This had none of the qualities of the usual books that you loved to read.

You looked out the window and sighed sadly.

You had lived in an orphanage since you were nine, and finally scraped up enough money to buy a small house in this tiny city as a young woman so that you could finally be independent. It had been a long road, but you still had a ways to go in your mind.

Your eyes focused on the palace. It was starting to flicker with light as the night came ever closer to swallowing day. You thought about the royal family. What must their life be like? Surely it was loving and beautiful. Two sons who protected the realms together, a loving yet strong father, and a kind hearted mother...

It was hard not to envy the thought of living their life, having their family. They must have a brilliant library! One with all kinds of stories and adventures for you to read about.

"That's it." You decided on a whim. "I'm going to sneak into the royal palace and steal a handful of books. I'll give them back... eventually. I'm tired of sitting still. Life should not be lived from the inside of a shack!"

With that, you scampered over to your wardrobe and opened the doors. You grabbed your long black coat, black shirt, leather gloves, pants and boots and quickly put them all on. You made sure your hair would not be in the way, and then looked in the mirror. Stealthy, very stealthy.

Suddenly you faltered. You did not know the first thing about fighting, if you were caught, it would be very unlikely you’d be able to escape.

You glanced over at the how-to book on your bed and sighed. Too late now, your mind was set on following through with this.

Chapter Text

As soon as dusk fell, you tiptoed out of your little house through the back door and locked it behind you. Your horse snorted when he saw you, finding it odd that you were out there this late.

"Hush Hamlet, I'm trying to remain unseen. Invisible. Do you understand?" You chided quietly.

Hamlet huffed out air through his nose.

"Good." You said with a smile, then mounted him bareback. You barely had enough money to buy him from his owner, (who hated the fact that he was smaller than expected) so a saddle would have to be bought later on.

"Time to go Hammy." You said quietly, then clicked your feet against him. He took off towards the hills, as you had intended. You knew that the forest was a little scary this late, but you would be unseen this way.

Luckily, no beastly creatures were lurking this night, and you made it to the palace safely.

While hiding in the shadows, Hammy looked curious. "Sorry I made you run so far, Hammy old boy." You apologized, then gently pet his neck.

Poor Hammy was a bit like you, a little more breakable than the others. "Hopefully it will be an easier ride back. You just rest here." You whispered once you got off of him, sure he would be loyal.

You crouched down low and walked over to the side wall that surrounded the palace. You could hear the footsteps of guards thumping, making their rounds.

Their voices were friendly, which contrasted your pounding heartbeat. Your back was flush against the wall and your black attire concealed you well, at least, that's what you hoped it did. Despite there being light inside the gates, outside it was very dark. The only light was provided by a few torches scattered alongside the wall.

Their voices grew closer.

"I hear Asgard is going to war." One of the guards said.

"With whom?" Said the other.

"Jotunheim, I think. Who knows why.” He shrugged.

They stopped a few feet in front of you, then continued on.

You let out a sigh of relief, then made your way to the gate. Luckily, someone was just riding out and you managed to slip by unnoticed. Your knees started to hurt with all of the crouching you were doing but you couldn't risk getting caught.

Why am I doing this again? You thought. Oh right... A book. I need to stop being impulsive, it doesn't suit me I think. You decided, and leaned back against the entrance wall.

"Did you hear something?" You heard a guard say.

Your breath caught in your chest and you remained frozen for an instant before you found safety behind a large potted plant near the front doors.

"I didn't hear anything."

"Nevermind. Just keep walking." The other guard shrugged.

Again you felt relieved, but the adrenaline pumping through your veins kept you uneasy. It was stressful yet invigorating. You had never done anything this dangerous since you tried to escape from the orphanage when you were young. You’d almost made it too, if one of the other girls hadn’t snitched on you.

You shook away distracting thoughts and tried to focus. No one appeared to be paying attention to the front doors, which you found somewhat ironic. You quietly grabbed the handle and yanked on the giant doors with all of your might to get them open, then slipped inside without anyone noticing.

Now to find the library....

You stayed close to the walls so as not to be noticed in case anyone happened to pass by. The palace was larger than you imagined in your mind and you were beginning to worry that you might get lost in the maze of hallways.

It didn't take long until you heard more footsteps. You were beginning to really, really, hate that sound. You quickly stepped behind a pillar for cover.

"Father intends to start a war against Jotunheim." You heard a deep, masculine voice say. You peeked out and saw a tuft of blonde hair. It was Prince Thor.

"I know, I was there." Came the snarky retort of an equally masculine voice, though more smooth, like velvet.

You didn't risk peeking to see who it was this time. Suddenly one pair of footsteps ceased movement.

"I know brother, but I- ...Loki? What are you doing?"

Once Thor had stopped speaking, the stillness began to settle uneasy with you.

Each second of silence was killing you inside. A footstep forward, another, another. A few steps away from you, then a few to the side.

Just find me if you're going to find me! You screamed in your mind as you slid down to crouch lower behind the pillar to try to hide yourself better.

"What are you staring at?" Thor asked, thoroughly perplexed.

"I thought I saw something." Loki mumbled, looking around the pillar for a moment before turning his gaze reluctantly back to his brother.

"You are being far too paranoid." Thor laughed, and began walking again.

"We'll see if you still say that when I keep a Jotun from stabbing you in the back. " Loki said, only partially joking as he followed him

Thor gave a hearty laugh. "I can take care of myself, little brother."

Their footsteps became faint, until it was silent again.

Finally free to roam, you walked around the hallways as quickly as possible, and after several minutes of wandering, you finally found two double doors. They were beautifully intricate and nothing had ever felt so rewarding as when you opened the doors and saw the room. It was twice the size of your library back home, and had books on all sides. Though... there were no titles, which you thought was odd.

You walked over to a shelf and reached out to take a book, only to have it flicker. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion and all at once the library vanished and a bedroom was revealed.

Startled, you blinked a few times, then heard the doors close from behind you.

"Hello love, find anything you like?" Came the amused voice of the trickster behind you.

You gasped in shock, then swallowed nervously and slowly turned to face him. "Prince Loki? H-How did you know what I was looking for?"

He smirked, then grabbed your wrist and pushed the sleeve of your coat up to reveal your skin. "Your wrist has ink on it. It is from reading old books, yes?"

You nodded, though a bit mindlessly since he was quite mesmerizing and this whole ordeal was a bit of a shock to you.

He smiled ever so slightly then tugged on the leather sleeve of his armor just enough to reveal a bit of faded ink on his own skin.

You smiled nervously and found it difficult to look him in the eyes, or even at his face. The uncertainty of your predicament was driving you mad, and his charming yet assertive behavior was not helping either.

"So, naturally," He continued. "I assumed an avid reader such as yourself had run out of books and envied the lavish library we have here in the palace."

You looked confused. "You perceived all of that from the smudged ink on my wrist?"

"That, and I saw the jealousy in your eyes." He said knowingly, then let go of your arm.

"You saw me?" You said, still keeping your eyes down and to the side of him.

"Behind the pillars, yes, and look at me when I speak to you. It is as if you haven't any manners at all." He tilted your chin up with his slender fingers so you would do as he asked.

He was much closer now than previously, so close in fact, that you could feel his cool breath on your skin. It made you very uncomfortable to have him looking at you so intently. He exuded intimidation, and this caused you to reach for the knife in your coat pocket while you tried to distract him.

"You remind me of-"

"Holmes?" He interrupted.

"Yes."

He shrugged. "A highly unrealistic character I think. Besides, I'm much more-" He deftly grabbed your wrist with his opposite hand, then spun you around and slammed your back against his chest. "Powerful."

The metal and leather armor did nothing to ease your comfort or your nerves as you now realized how feeble your attempt had been against the trained prince.

He took your hand from your pocket and looked at the weapon with a stifled laugh. "A butter knife?"

You squirmed a bit under his grasp and tried not to allow your embarrassment to overwhelm you. "I may have only been equipped with a butter knife, but I did not need it, for I slipped past Odin's feeble defenses easily. Honestly, when a woman of my ability can breach your security, you are all in trouble. Now let go of me and I will be on my way."

Loki snickered. "You have a bite to you, don't you maiden." He kept your back flush against his chest, while you continued to attempt to escape his grasp. "How did you enter?"

"The front doors. No one was guarding them, which is quite foolish if you ask me." You said while you struggled even further to get free.

Loki frowned and easily kept you from leaving. "You may have a valid argument at that. However, you are still a criminal, and I have to hand you over to Odin."

You shuddered at the thought, and suddenly your tough attitude faded away once again. Feeling his grip loosen, you moved so you could face him. "I was not going to kill you, just threaten you and leave!"

He chuckled softly at the humorous phrasing of your statement. He was a little entertained by your inexperience in matters such as these, and he could tell that you were relatively harmless.

"I only snuck into the palace so that I might find a few more books for me to read." You explained once more and looked up at him with a pleading expression.

Loki looked conflicted, and ran his fingers through his hair with his free hand. "It is books that you want?" He repeated, as he seemed to ponder the idea.

Your eyes looked up at him in a flash, seeing hope in his somewhat friendly behavior. "Yes, just books. They are my friends, as silly as it sounds."

He shook his head, his eyes softening considerably as he looked down and to the side of you. "No, it isn't silly." He sighed, then tossed the butter knife away. "I will show you to the library, but only on the condition that you must do as I say, and tell no one of this afterward. Once you have your books you must leave. Understood?"

You nodded fervently. "Yes my prince, thank you." You replied, rediscovering your manners suddenly.

The thought of so many books made you incredibly excited, and Prince Loki seemed to be more understanding than his reputation had you believe. You hoped you could hold all of the books you might want in your arms well enough.

Chapter Text

As Prince Loki escorted you down the hallways, your eyes were wide in awe. You'd finally let it sink in, how amazing this really was. You were being escorted to the royal library by none other than the Prince of Asgard, Loki himself! It was the fantasy you never knew you'd wanted until this moment.

Loki looked at your amazed expression and chuckled. "If you are excited now, I wonder what you will do when we actually get there."

Once he had stopped in front of the incredibly large golden double doors of the library, you looked up at him with an eager smile.

"Ready?" He asked, a half smile adorning his striking features.

You gave a single nod and a smile. "Yes."

He then opened the doors, and your eyes instantly lit up with wonder at the sight of the grand place. The room was five, no, ten times the size of the library in Cristatus!

You slowly entered the vast space, and once the initial shock had passed, you ran to the center of the library. You cast your gaze up to the walls, which were lined with bookshelves, each shelf intricately carved. There was even a large skylight on the ceiling to admire the stars from. The room instantly gave you a calming effect and it was as if you'd found your second home. 

"How can you resist making this your bedroom instead?" You asked, although, still unable to keep your eyes from wandering across the room.

Loki chuckled. "That is a thought. But the library does not belong solely to me, unfortunately."

"It might as well," You said, then turned and looked into his eyes with a knowing smile. "You love it the most."

Surprisingly, he actually averted your gaze and rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. He glanced up then to the side again before he cleared his throat and was finally able to look at you for long enough to say, "Well, go on, pick the books you'd like to take."

You nodded, thinking it best not to push your luck. "Any recommendations?" You asked as you wandered over to a shelf and fingered through the various titles.

"Several. I'll show you." He said with a grin, then walked over to different spots in the library and picked out a handful of books. When he came to you, he saw that you also had a stack in your hands.

He chuckled when he caught you and you smiled at him with a guilty but sweet expression. Your expressiom looked akin to a child who had gotten caught in the middle of something.

"I just couldn't resist." You said, then looked at the books in his hands. "Hmm... I suppose I will have to choose." You said sadly, knowing that you would have to both carry them, and ride back home, so there wasn't anyway to take them all.

Feeling indecisive, you set the books down on a table so that you could think the problem through.

Loki looked down for a moment in thought, then up at the thousands of books lining the walls. He had never dreamed that he would be in this very special room with someone who would appreciate it as much as he did. He had to admit, it was a good feeling. Having made up his mind, he set down his books on a table next to the ones you'd picked.

"Don't worry." He decided. "I will bring you here again under more... legal circumstances." He said with a soft laugh.

You blinked a few times then looked up at him in shock. "You... You would do that for me?"

Loki folded his arms over his chest as a way to subconsciously deflect the accusation of sentiment. "Don't look too much into it dear. It just isn't everyday that someone actually appreciates this room as much as I do."

"Prince Loki, I cannot thank you enough. I owe you a debt." You said, and bowed respectfully.

He shook his head. "It is simply books, nothing to be indebted for." He said as he waved off your gratitude.

"You know it is more than that.." You said with a kind smile, then took a step closer to him and looked up at his handsome face with genuine appreciation and affection. "Thank you Prince Loki, of Asgard. I will take one book and look forward to seeing you again." You said, then picked one of the books he'd picked out for you before you bowed once more, then left to sneak out of the palace.

Loki was left with his mind reeling, unused to such blatant appreciation of… well, anything he did. The attention or adoration he did receive was always a condition of his status. If anything, the people who did so, did it in spite of who he was. He wasn't the prince that Asgardians gushed over nor was he praised for his talents as Thor was praised for his. 

Yet, you saw him with eyes that he had been sure time and time again would only belong to Thor.

Admiration.

It had been almost a strange experience, to actually have a stranger appreciate his interests genuinely.

Wait. Stranger…? Loki thought as he snapped out of his daze to realize something very important.

He didn't know your name.

He searched the halls, half hoping that you had gotten lost on the way out so he might find you, but no, you were gone.

Chapter Text

Loki's POV

I wandered around the library the following afternoon aimlessly, bored out of my mind. I was so restless and I just did not know what to do with myself. I tried reading, but grew impatient, I went for a walk, but it did little to soothe my racing mind. I needed stimulation! Something to do, maybe even someone to talk to..

I grunted in disgust at my own neediness. I was not usually this way. Typically I can be content simply reading a book and keeping away from Thor and his friends, but not now. Why? What was it that I wanted so badly that was not currently within my reach?

Companionship.

That was the first word that came to mind. I was.. lonely. How could it be? Usually, I was the only one who did not annoy me. My mother was calming to talk to, but even she sometimes bothered me. She respects both Thor and Odin more than I will ever understand.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that there was no one like me. I hadn't thought of it in such a depressing way before. I used to be proud of this fact, that there was no one like me. But now.. it seemed hollow. Why was I having these doubts about my happiness?

Suddenly a more accurate answer burst forth to the forefront of my mind and I groaned in frustration. It was that woman!

"What is wrong with me?!" I huffed just as Thor and The Warriors Three entered.

"If not even you know, how can we?" Fandral laughed. I glared at him viciously.

"What ails you brother?" Thor asked with a friendly smile.

I sighed heavily, feeling a little anxious with all of these unwanted people near me. "At the moment?" I asked with a cheeky grin as I looked at the pestering warriors. I then left the library in stride.

I heard them muttering about me as I left, but I did not care. I had other things on my mind than their approval.

I had never much thought about how I.. felt about things before. It was usually very simple. Sometimes I felt anger, frustration, envy, and occasionally affection for my family and acted according to how I felt at the time. I never thought of why I felt that way or what I was feeling at each moment, not until the emotion was so strong that I could not help but act upon it. But these particular emotions were stronger than I was accustomed to. This longing for companionship, and also a feeling of emptiness was somewhat familiar, but another strong feeling akin to determination or passion, I had not felt before, and I did not know why I felt it exactly. But I knew it had something to do with her.

I didn't used to care about these things, but now that it disturbed my peace and thought process considerably, I decided to do something about it.

I blinked a few times and realized that I had walked outside the palace without thinking about it. There were two guards posted beside the front doors now, at my request. They glanced at me strangely then looked straight ahead. I ignored them for the moment, and looked out at the distance.

I wonder... I thought. If I might find her someday, roaming around the capital. It would be interesting to see her again.. I caught the guards looking at me for a second time and glared. "Look at me again and you die." I snarled.

The two men stood up straight, fear clearly in their eyes.

I laughed. "As you were." I said, being only mockingly serious and entered the palace once more.

As hours passed, the intensity of these thoughts and feelings grew stronger and continued to plague me. I tried with all of my might to sort them out with my intellect, or ignore them completely but it was useless. Utterly useless.

That night I paced the floor of my chambers, still in my day clothes, a pale green shirt with a leather vest and black leather pants.

I went over our encounter over and over again in my mind and realized that this feeling, whatever it was, was very powerful, something that I could not push aside and ignore, like fear or pain. I would have to accept it and try to contain it or find a way to destroy it. Of course I knew that the latter would be more difficult but... it was worth a shot.

That's it. I will erase her from my mind. Her strong willed spirit, her lovely face, her wild ambition that captivates me..

I shook my head. It will all be gone in the morning. I shall sleep and never think of her again.

~One week later - Evening~

"Loki?" Odin's voice echoed throughout the dining hall. "Are you listening?"

"I'm surprised you care if I do." I muttered, in no mood to feign a cordial attitude.

"It matters to all of Asgard that you do." Odin said, his expression stern and unfeeling.

I remained quiet, my jaw set with frustration, I had been increasingly irritable as of late. Even more so than usual.

Odin continued droning. "...they have ignored our warnings repeatedly and-"

"Dear, please, this is not the war room." Frigga reminded her husband politely.

He simply sighed and continued eating.

Thor paid no attention to me, and neither did my father. Frigga glanced at me once or twice, trying to assess what I was so angry about no doubt.

Eventually the silence and my growing irritation surpassed my patience and I left the dining hall quietly before I finished my food.

I walked down the hallways until I reached my chambers, then opened the balcony doors to feel the cool evening air on my skin. I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath. I opened my eyes to the sight of a candlelit home glowing in a small city in the distance, if I remember my lessons correctly, it was Cristatus. I did not need to wonder who lived in the modest home however, because soon a woman's silhouette contrasted against the golden light and in her hands appeared to be a book. She sat down, presumably upon her bed, and opened the book.

One might think it strange that I assumed to know the identity of this unknown woman, but something inside me knew that it was her.

The way her relaxed form read peacefully reminded me so much of myself that it pained me to see it and not be apart of it. Being lost in a story was something I used to enjoy immensely, until I had my encounter with her.

Perhaps.. Perhaps I could enjoy that quiet activity once more if I met her again, and invited her here.

Since she presumably lived in Cristatus, it should not be too difficult for me to find her in the small city.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow I would find her, and end my misery.

~.~.~.~

After spending almost the entire day trying to convince myself not to go, that evening I finally did what I had decided to do yesterday and rode into the city to find her. I wore a dark green hooded cloak to hide my identity from the public and wore my more casual attire underneath along with my black riding boots. I first went to the town center, to inquire as to where I might find her at this time of night, but I did not need to ask for her, for my eyes caught sight of her lovely form by a street vender's fruit cart. She was illuminated with a golden glow from the torch lamps up above her. My heart raced with anxiety and my palms became sweaty. I did not know what I was so worried about. I was a prince after all.

I gently tapped her shoulder and smiled. "Hello, Maiden."

She turned to face me with an expression of confusion on her delicate face. Her eyes stared at me with an intensity that I could not determine if it was anger or curiosity. Maybe it was both.

"I never thought I'd see you again, I'll admit." She finally said, very quietly as she set the apple in her hand back in the cart. "You.. aren't here to arrest me are you?"

"No, no!" I assured, too hasty for my liking, I didn't want to appear desperate. "I mean, I.. did promise to take you to the library again."

"I see..." She said, suspicion clearly in her voice. She didn't trust me. Understandable and wise of her, honestly.

"Why didn't you come sooner?" She asked suddenly and took a step forward to look into my eyes, which were shadowed by my hood. I smirked a bit, it was amusing to see her so determined to figure me out.

"I did not have your name, Maiden."

She took a step back and relaxed a little. "Oh." She held her hands together sheepishly and said, "My name is ____."

"Pleased to have found you, ____." I said with a slight smirk as I looked at her. I made sure to be charming for her. I needed her to come with me back to the palace, or I knew I would be inprisioned by these wretched emotions forever.

"How did you find me?" She asked with her head tilted in curiosity.

"Well um.." I flustered, a bit unprepared. "I.. have my ways."

She nodded slowly then looked up at me with a small smile. "Well then, let us go to the library as you promised." She decided.

I faltered for a moment, my facade of confidence starting to crumble away in her presence beyond my control. I took a step forward, my height allowed me to hover over her slightly. "Is that what you want?"

She looked confused and leaned back slightly, trying to assess me again. Why was she so impossibly curious? And why didn't I mind it?

"I do not understand." She said quietly to me, as if it were just the two of us, and no one else in the outdoor market place which was slowly becoming more crowded.

"Why have you agreed to come with me?"

Her cheeks flushed a wonderful shade of pink and she took a step back to get out from underneath my shadow. She leaned her shoulders back and said, "I am coming with you because you have decided to keep your promise. And..." Now it was she who was losing her tough exterior, which, oddly enough, comforted me a bit.

"And...?" I encouraged, closing the gap between us once more.

"To be honest, my Prince, and please do not take this badly-"

"I won't."

"-you intrigue me.. You're unlike anyone I've ever met." She finally admitted.

I could not help but smile as relief flooded through my body. She was as interested in me, as I was in her. It was amazing to me, after having been ignored or disrespected for so many years, she.. was immensely curious about me.

"Well then, let us be off."

As I took her hand to lead her to my horse I could see that illusive, unknown, emotion in her eyes.

What was it...?

I helped her upon my horse then saddled it myself in front of her, her arms wrapped around my waist to keep herself steady. I snapped the reins and headed for the palace as I thought about this mystery.

Perhaps it didn't matter what it was, because I could see that she felt it too, whatever it was. And that was enough for me for now.

Chapter Text

On the ride back, you were well aware of your heart pounding against your chest, and in turn, against Loki, as you held onto him during the ride to the palace. It was exhilarating, yet frightening to experience all of this so suddenly. You wondered if you would meet anyone else while at the palace, and if so, how he would explain your presence?

"You are very quiet, for being such a clever young maiden." Loki observed smoothly.

You gave a breathy laugh. "That is how I remain clever my Prince." You responded, and looked up at the dazzling stars up above.

"By remaining silent?"

"No, by thinking before I speak." You explained with a soft smile, your voice drifting off as your thoughts were more focused on the night sky.

He remained silent for the remainder of the journey, and you were not sure if it was because something you had said displeased him, or if he was genuinely uninterested in you. Perhaps neither, you couldn't tell by just looking at the back of his head after all.

Several minutes later he finally broke the silence. "We have arrived."

He dismounted the steed, then held his arms out to assist you. You smiled gently in thanks and allowed him to help you down. He then took off his cloak, and looked at you with a somewhat reserved expression. "Follow me, and do not speak to anyone unless spoken to." He instructed and began walking. His long strides already put a distance between you, so you quickened your steps to match his pace then looked up at him. "Is my presence here forbidden?"

"No.. Not necessarily." He sighed softly, and continued to look ahead of him as he entered through the large doors of the Asgardian building. "I do not want to cause conflict for myself when I needn't." Loki elaborated. He glanced at you every once and a while, probably to ensure that you did not wander off.

"I will do as you say." You said simply and sincerely.

His eyes were focused on you once again, yet this time, his gaze lingered a second or two more. He turned his head to look straight ahead as you two turned a corner. "Is it trust or naivety that persuades you to accept my instruction I wonder." He murmured aloud, pondering the idea, yet clearly wanting an answer.

"It is neither my Prince. 'Tis an observation that, should you have wished to shame me, you would have done so when I first arrived, when you had the upper hand."

"Perhaps I enjoy the chase." He said with a smirk, though you could see in his eyes that he was testing you.

"Forgive me prematurely my Prince, for being so bold." You began.

"I will."

"From what I have both heard and experienced, you are not the sort of man who wishes to do the chasing..." You said with a bitter-sweet smile, a pain in your eyes that was reminiscent of his own.

He stopped walking, as you had reached the library. His eyes examined you thoroughly, searching for a threat or a sign of deception. "Really? And how can you be so certain?" He challenged, his eyes narrowed slightly.

You looked down at his boots with a soft sigh, gathering your thoughts before tilting your head up to look back into his eyes. "I am certain, my Prince, because lonely people are tired of chasing others."

Loki parted his lips to speak, but he closed his mouth soon after. He kept his eyes on you for a few more moments longer, then said, "Let us enter the library once more." He turned his back and he opened the doors wide.

The room was mostly as you remembered it, save a few books placed on a table or two.

You could feel Loki's eyes on you, thinking, calculating.

"Ah, here are my books." You said merrily, trying to lighten the mood. You strode over to a wooden table at the back of the room and saw that the books were neatly stacked together, presumably by Loki. You smiled as you looked at the cover of each book, reminded of why you chose them. You could sense Loki standing beside you, though you hadn't heard him approach. You turned to acknowledge his presence but your words failed you when you saw how pink his cheeks were. He looked nervous, almost sheepish, his eyes looked worried, and his hands were clasped together, as if comforting himself.

"What ails you my Prince?" You asked with genuine concern, wanting to reach out and touch his wrist to soothe him, but restraining yourself do to your differing classes.

"I'm fine." He said, barely audible, as his eyes looked at the bookshelf then at you. He seemed to either be very conflicted or very ill.

"Perhaps I should fetch one of the healers for you my Prince?" You insisted.

"No. Please Maiden, I am perfectly alright." Loki insisted, though he seemed to be the picture of anxiety.

The echo of bootsteps pushed aside the otherwise quiet room and Loki breathed a heavy sigh in despair.

"See! I told you he would be here Thor." Fandral declared, as the warriors three entered the room, along with Thor, the most talked about young man in all of Asgard.

"We have a guest I see." Thor grinned. "Is that why you were not at dinner brother?" He asked with a knowing smile.

Loki's eyes narrowed in defense, but you could sense that he was uncomfortable and embarrassed.

"King Odin will not be pleased to see her here." Hogan spoke, recognizing the simplicity of your attire and attributing it to your class.

You remained silent while Loki took up a more confident stance. "I do not think it is any business of Odin's whom I have as a guest. If anything, he should be grateful that I'm being so kind to our people. Valhalla forbid that he interact with them."

Loki's remark was mostly ignored.

Fandral took a few gallant steps toward you, admiring your dress. It was a midnight blue gown that ended at your ankles and had sleeves that began off your shoulders. "You are truly a beauty to behold." He said with a dashing smile as he took your hand and brought it to his lips, his blonde mustache tickling a bit underneath your skin.

You smiled politely. "You are too kind."

"Is there any reason you wanted to see me?" Loki questioned, his jaw set in frustration.

"Yes, we saw you two entering the palace when we finished speaking to Heimdall about the recent developments in our upcoming war against Jotunheim." Fandral explained. He let go of your hand, but was unable to keep his eyes off of you.

"What did he say?" Loki asked, more attentive now.

"First tell us why she is here." Thor insisted, impossibly curious to see why his younger brother was willingly spending time with a woman of a lower class.

Loki sighed. "Her name is _____. I went to visit the small library in Cristatus, planning on causing a bit of harmless mischief, but I caught sight of her reading a book I had once enjoyed myself, and we spoke for a while. I brought her here so she might enjoy our library." Loki lied with incredible ease.

Thor nodded, accepting Loki's answer. "Heimdall has seen their army grow in numbers and in strength. He is still unaware of their strategy. As we are all aware, Frost Giants are always prepared for war, they might have spoken about their war plans years in advance."

Loki nodded. "They are blood thirsty wretches aren't they...? No matter, Asgard's army and defenses will be enough to defeat them."

"And what insight have you of war? You're always reading those books instead of battling, and you're as skinny as a twig!" Volstagg laughed, with the others following suit, save Hogan who rarely laughed to begin with.

Thor snickered softly. "You really ought to eat more brother." He jeered.

Loki's confidence seemed to drain all at once and he turned his head away from you, looking ashamed. He was usually a roaring flame, but now he was a slowly burning ember, losing the energy to flare up again. It broke your heart to see him that way. You did not know why at the time, but it did.

"Perhaps if he turns to the side he will disappear!" Fandral mocked.

"See that Loki, you need not practice your illusions anymore!" Thor exclaimed. The sounds of their laughter almost seemed to vibrate against the walls.

You'd had enough. With your shoulders back, you confronted them. "It matters not the size of his waist, for, while you ponderous oafs have only brute strength, Loki is well muscled and has three times the mental capacity as the likes of you."

It was coldly silent. You could feel all eyes on you, especially Loki's, but unlike the others, he was smirking with satisfaction.

"You forget your place Maiden." Thor warned sharply, his blue eyes staring straight at you.

"You forget yours. As a brother." You said, just as fierce. " 'Tis a sad day indeed when the Prince of Asgard will not stand by his own brother."

Thor took a few steps forward. "I have stood by my brother in every battle we have ever faced, is that not loyalty enough?" He asked, his eyes burning with anger.

"I hate the word 'enough' in your statement. There should be a never ending bond of loyalty and trust between brothers. 'Enough' implies that you are meeting the standards half way."

"You are an ignorant, tackless woman." Thor growled, then turned his back and left the room, the warriors awkwardly following behind him.

You sighed softly, wondering if you had made a mistake in angering the mighty Thor.

Loki waited until you two were completely and entirely alone before he faced you, his eyes gazing intensely into your own as he moved closer to you, backing you up until you bumped into the bookcase with a squeak.

He gently grazed your hand with his own to assure you that it was alright, a gentle smile present on his thin lips which had a mixture of emotions. Mischief, happiness, satisfaction. It was all so confusing.

You did not know what he would say or do to you. You determined that he was pleased, but you had disrespected the most honored warriors in Asgard, how pleased could he really be about that?

While all of these questions circled in your mind, he put each of his hands on either side of your head. He leaned over you, causing a shadow to block out most of the candelight from you. He squinted for a moment, thinking, still with that mysterious smirk present.

You had no idea what he was trying to accomplish by doing this, but his shimmering blue-green eyes bore down on you with such intensity that you couldn't help but look up at them and burn into your memory how beautiful they looked..

He took a few steps back and put his hands behind his back with a delightful grin. "I'm impressed."

This man was remarkably unpredictable. "You are?" Was all you managed to say.

He nodded. "Why did you do it?" He asked, head tilted to the side.

"They were being cruel."

He looked thoughtful for a time, then smirked as he said, "You consider me well muscled?"

You swallowed nervously and looked away from him. "I'm sure any maiden would when asked." Was your shy, yet diplomatic response.

"But I did not ask 'any maiden', I asked you." He said smartly.

"This is true."

"Your answer should include either a yes, or a no." Loki said, losing his patience.

"Yes." You consented, much to his enjoyment. "But please do not think too much of it, it was merely and observation, nothing more."

"Of course." He agreed, though his smirk clearly contradicted his words. He seemed to have gotten the information he needed about you. There was more trust in his gaze when he looked at you than before. Your bold act was not something to be taken lightly. Especially since Odin could imprison you if he found you to be disrespectful enough.

You hoped it wouldn't come to that... you were really beginning to like the dark haired prince.

Chapter Text

"Do you still approve of the books that you chose?" Loki asked, after a bout of awkward silence between the two of you.

"Yes, very much, thank you." You said with a nod, as you moved to retrieve them.

"Maiden?"

You turned to face him and saw that his cheeks were flushed, he was once again nervous about something. "Yes, my Prince?"

"I wonder if you'd enjoy reading with me this evening. I realize how late it has become but..."

"I'd love to." You replied, smiling up at him. "Is that why you looked so disturbed earlier? If you don't mind me asking that is."

He sighed, looking a bit guilty. "Yes, it was."

"I am surprised you would worry. You are a Prince of Asgard, how could I refuse?"

Loki frowned and gazed at you intently. "Is that why you agreed?"

You shook your head. "If I can insult a Prince, why should I not also be able to reject one?"

"That was why I was nervous." He said, and swiftly headed to the other side of the library, clearly having a particular book in mind.

Loki seemed to be in a battle between keeping himself guarded, and opening up to you. It was as if he were leaving clues about himself for you to find, hoping that you would be the one he could finally depend upon, maybe even befriend. At least.. that's how you felt about it.

"Ah, here it is, Never Lost." Loki's deep voice echoed from where he had found the book.

You walked over to plush grape colored love seat and sat down, as you watched him walk over to you.

"I have never read this book before in it's entirety, only about to the fourth chapter." He admitted as he sat down beside you.

"Why did you stop?"

"It was too.. sad." He said softly, and glanced down at the worn light blue book in his hands. He then looked at you with a gentle smile. "Perhaps reading it with you will allow me to bare through the difficult parts, and see the beauty that I hope lies within the rest of the pages." He confessed with a remarkable amount of tenderness.

"I hope so." You smiled, as you watched him open up the book. "I do despise sad endings."

He looked at you with a doeful smile, yet, there was a gentle fondness in his eyes. "Would you like to start us off or shall I?"

"I'd like to hear you read first, you have such an elegant voice my Prince." You complimented, and were rewarded with a happier smile.

"Very well, young maiden. I shall grace your ears with my voice and begin the tale myself." He said with a playful wink then cleared his throat softly before he began reading.

"When I was young, I wanted nothing more than to be just like my father. He was strong, and confident. He always knew what was necessary to protect us. However, he knew little about the complex nature of emotions, how people need to not only know that you care, but feel it, and hear it with kind words of affection that a father should have for a son. My mother was kind and quick witted, so I drew to her. But no matter how much I cared for my mother, (despite what rumors would have you believe) I never did grow out of my childish goal. I still wanted to be like my father, even though I could never live up to his expectations. Now I know better, but as a child... He was my hero." Loki turned the page and gently handed you the book. "Sentimental rubbish so far. I'd forgotten about it. We can skip it if you'd like."

"No, no. We must know his past or his success will mean nothing." You explained, and began reading yourself.

~*~*~*~

A few hours passed very quickly, as you two had easily surpassed the fourth chapter. Occasionally you two would take a break and admire the stars from the clear glass skylight up above. Loki was quiet for the most part during these times, but sometimes he would ask you what your thoughts about the book were so far, and you would ask him the same. For much of the time however, he was a little reserved.

You could tell that he was still having a little trouble opening up, but, he at least seemed to be mostly comfortable with you, and honestly, you felt the same way with him.

The grandfather clock chimed to inform you that is was now 2 am.

You were reading with your eyes half open, heavy with sleep for you'd had a long day. Never the less, you wanted to know what would happen next in the story and continued reading. "...The woman was absolutely relentless. I could not understand for the life of me why she was still so fond of me, but apparently she had seen good despite the horrors of..." Your voice drifted off. You could not fight the drowsiness any longer, the couch was much too comfortable, and... you were happy with Loki.

Somehow, after spending those hours reading with him, and knowing the amount of power he held, you felt safe. Safe enough to let your guard down a bit and doze off. Your head lay against Loki's shoulder, your eyes closed, and the book fallen across both of your laps.

"Allow me to take you home, maiden _____." Loki said kindly, allowing you to rest against him for the time being.

"But we must find out why... she loves him..." You murmured with slurred speech, then fell into a deep sleep, unable to hear anything anymore.

~*~*~*~

Your eyes fluttered open the following morning to the sight of a maid opening up the curtains. She was an older woman, and looked very friendly.

You rubbed your eyes, thinking that you were still dreaming.

"Good morning maiden, Prince Loki said I ought to wake you up. He has invited you to breakfast, which will be served in the dining hall at nine."

You shook your head to wake yourself up fully and jolted upright when you realized where you were. "How did I get here?" You asked her, feeling a little uneasy.

"Prince Loki said you arrived last night when-"

"No, I'm sorry. I meant, how did I get in this room, I was asleep in the library last."

She tried to hide her smile. Prince Loki was never this sociable, and she knew that this woman must be somewhat important to him for him to treat her so well. "The Prince must have carried you here when you fell asleep in the library."

You nodded. "Oh.. That was very kind of him."

This time she could not help but smile. "Yes, it was. If you need me to help you dress for breakfast, I am of service to you."

"Oh no, I'm quite alright, thank you."

"Very well." She said, then looked at the wardrobe. "There are dresses in there, and the wash room is through that door." She explained, then left the room.

After you had washed up and fixed your hair decently, you picked out a dress which was much more expensive than you had ever worn before. It was light blue and shimmered with golden sparkles, and flowed down to your ankles. You matched it with a pair of heels.

"I hope I'm not too formal." You muttered to yourself before stepping outside the room in search of the dining hall. You felt a little nervous as you wandered. You had never met any of these people, except for Loki. What if Queen Frigga and King Odin were there? What did Loki say about you? Did Thor tell them what you had said yesterday? The potential for social awkwardness was incredibly high and you really did not like your odds.

Not only that, but it did seem rather odd that Loki would not simply wake you up and take you home last night. Why should he want you to stay here until the morning as you had? You shook your head, trying to focus on the task at hand; not getting lost.

After asking around a bit, you finally found the dining hall, which was indeed a hall, since it was very long and both doors on either end were wide open. Everyone was already sitting there, waiting for the food to be served. They did not notice you at first. Prince Thor was talking to his father while Queen Frigga and Loki remained silent for now. You kept your eyes on Loki so that he might see you before you made any social faux pas.

Luckily for you, he did notice you, and he stood up to officially acknowledge your presence. "Good morning, Maiden ____."

You curtsied gracefully. "Good morning, Prince Loki."

Loki beaconed you over. With all eyes on you, you walked over to him as Loki explained. "Mother, father, this is Maiden ____."

As you sat down beside Loki, you said hello and smiled kindly to the royal family.

"Is she a friend of yours, my son?" Queen Frigga inquired with a gentle smile.

Loki looked at you, and you looked up at him with a hardly noticeable, hopeful smile, then you looked down the plate in front of you, while he kept his eyes on you for a moment longer. He then looked to his mother and responded. "Yes, she is my friend."

You smiled up at him gratefully, telling him in your silent way that you were glad to be called his friend.

Queen Frigga turned her gaze towards you. "Does your husband support you well?"

You shook your head. "I am not married, my Queen, and my family... my family is dead. I support myself."

Thor grunted in disapproval.

Frigga shot him a warning glance before continuing. "And what is your trade, dear girl?"

You smiled, relieved that the Queen's reputation for being kind was not just rumor. "I was the apprentice of my father, who was a blacksmith by trade. But then, after the war, I learned how to sew, since no one wanted to hire a woman to craft their weapons."

The Queen nodded in understanding and not a moment later, the servants entered the room with platters of food.

As they served, Loki whispered into your ear, "A black smith's daughter and you came at me with a butter knife?" He teased.

You glared at him playfully. "I was being impulsive, and crafting a sword takes too long and is far too expensive."

He chuckled softly. "I don't think spontaneity suits you."

You rolled your eyes but smiled at him. "I realize that now, my Prince. Especially when endeavoring to overtake someone such as you."

He smirked at this, clearly pleased, while Odin cleared his throat, taking the two of you out of your little world. Luckily the table was long enough for your conversation not to have been overheard clearly. That did not stop Queen Frigga from smiling however. "You two do well together."

Feeling a bit shy, you looked to Loki to answer. He also was a bit flustered, but managed to respond. "Thank you mother."

Once breakfast was served, Odin and Thor dug into the meal with animal like instincts. Frigga ate a bit more slowly, as did Loki, though after half way through the incredibly large meal, you were absolutely stuffed. Each plate was huge, and loaded with meats, potatoes, vegetables, and sweet breads, the typical breakfast for the realm. You didn't know how they were able to eat so much.

"You must eat more, maiden, don't be a bird." King Odin scolded disrespectfully. Most Asgardians could eat at least three times as much as you did.

"Does the food not please you?" Queen Frigga asked gently.

"Oh no, the food is absolutely delicious. It is perhaps the best meal I've had in ages! I just have never been able to eat very much."

"That is not good." King Odin remarked, not looking up from his plate. "What use are you if you are weak and frail?"

Your shoulders straightened back in defense, and you felt your temper start to rise. You had been through many hardships, and yet always managed to push through and sustain yourself at your young age. You may be a little more fragile than the other Asgardians, but useless, you were not.

Loki sensed that you were upset, and spoke for you. "Pardon me father, but I know for a fact that this woman is anything but weak."

Odin finally looked up from his plate and got a good look at you. "Your father was Lydell. My general in the previous war against Jotunheim."

You nodded. "Yes, he died at the hands of a Jotun."

Odin seemed to gain realization and shook his head. "Forgive me for my rudeness, Maiden. I did not know." He said with sincerity, then went back to eating.

You were in absolute shock, and so was Loki, and even Thor, for that matter. "T-Thank you, my King." You managed to say, wondering what possessed Odin to apologize to a mere commoner. He, who was known to be proud.

Odin stopped eating when he felt all eyes on him, and explained, "Your father was a good man, and the most loyal person I could ever ask for. His honor will forever bring the same to your name."

You nodded in understanding. "Thank you. However, my father's honor is not my own, I will prove my worth to Asgard one day, and make my father proud as he looks down on me from Valhalla." You replied respectfully.

Odin smiled. He actually smiled. "It is not everyday a woman of your status is so determined. Your spirit reminds me much of my dear Frigga." He said, and looked to his wife with endearment.

"That is incredibly kind of you to say my King, I am honored to receive such a compliment." You looked up at Loki to see how was reacting to all of this. His eyes were a bit dull, but once he noticed you looking at him, he smiled at you softly.

This had definitely gone a lot better than you had hoped.

Chapter Text

After breakfast was over, Loki had acted in a rather perplexing manner. He ceased to look at you once the plates were cleared. He excused himself from the table and briskly walked out of the hall. You did not understand what was bothering him so, and feared you had done something wrong in his eyes.

"My Prince?" You called after him as you hurried to catch up to his quick strides.

He refused to even grace you with a glance.

"Prince Loki, wait!" You sprinted past him and blocked his path. "What is the matter my Prince? Have I offended you?"

The raven haired man looked incredibly irritated. "Why do you bother speaking to me? Shouldn't you be conversing with your lover, Odin? I'm sure he would be pleased to hear what you have to say."

You scowled at him. "Don't be perverse. Now, tell me what ails you." You said sternly, yet lovingly.

He sighed to release a bit of his pent up anger. "You insolent, treacherous woman. I let you into the palace, you a mere commoner. And this is how you repay me?!"

"Prince Loki, please! I thought we were getting along fairly well.. Please tell me why you are angry with me before you take further action."

He sighed heavily, with his hands curled into fists. "If you must know.." He said through clenched teeth. He took in a deep breath to try and calm down. "Odin and I have never been particularly close." He turned his head, not wanting to face your confused and sympathetic expression. "He has always favored Thor. He could do no wrong in Odin's eyes."

"Then he meets you for less than an hour and declares you to be honorable, simply because your deceased father had fought in battle with him. You did not even earn it!" He growled, his frame now turned toward you, eyes narrowed.

You were a little afraid of his darkened tone at first, but found your courage soon enough. "That is why I told King Odin that I didn't want his respect simply because of what my father had done."

"Yes, I know." He said, his temper still livid. "But even in your rejection he still admired you. You are yet another who can do no wrong." He said with disgust.

"Enough." You stated boldly, your posture the essence of strength. "I am not without an element of imperfection Prince Loki. Or do you forget that it was I who broke one of the King's laws by trespassing?" You contended with a soft smile, trying to bring him out of the bitterness that seemed to be within him.

"Yes, I remember." He grumbled.

"And yesterday, when I supported you?"

He sighed and nodded, he seemed to be more sad than angry now, and you desperately felt the need to hug and comfort him, he looked as though he had the weight of the realms upon his shoulders..

"Loki, you called me your friend today, were you sincere?" You asked carefully.

He nodded. "Yes, I was. You are not my enemy, nor are you my acquaintance, so therefore you are my friend."

"I consider you to be my friend as well.. I did not mean to hurt you, if I did."

Loki remained still and quiet, looking down at nothing with dull eyes.

"If it would make you happier for me to leave... I will do so." You said honestly, though not without a tinge of sadness in your voice.

He shook his head. "No. It would not please me to have you leave..." He sighed. "My anger was misdirected, it seems." He admitted mildly.

An awkward silence filled the room for a few seconds. Both of you were unsure what to do now.

"If it's any consolation," You spoke up, causing him to look at you once again. "Thor eats like a pig."

His eyebrows raised in surprise and he tried to suppress his laughter but failed horribly. "Ehehehe! Yes, I do think I will be proud to call you friend."

You grinned, very happy to have amused him. "Thank you my Prince, I am honored to be gifted with such a title."

"Loki." He said quietly, as he guided you to walk with him. "If you are to be my friend, then I wish for you to call me by my name."

You nodded with a smile. "As you wish. ... Loki."

Chapter Text

You two walked together to the royal gardens, and as soon as it came into full view, you were in awe. There was flowers of all shapes, colors, and sizes, as well as other vegetation that you had never seen before. The air had the sweet aroma of a thousand flowers, each with delicate petals that were soft to the touch. It was truly amazing.

Loki noticed your astonished expression and smiled. "I assume that this pleases you?"

You smiled. "Yes, it does. Who maintains it?"

"My mother and our gardeners. There are plants from nearly all of the realms here. Mother says that it should remind us of how vast and beautiful our universe is."

You looked up at him with a sweet smile. "You are very fond of your mother."

Loki nodded. "Did you know your mother well?" He asked with gentle consideration.

You sighed softly. "No, I.. I didn't know her at all, I've only seen drawings of her. She died soon after her labor with me.."

Loki looked at you with sad and sympathetic eyes. "I'm so sorry.."

You took a deep breath then exhaled. "The hardest part is, I can't even miss her.. because, I did not know her. I can only wonder what it might have been like to have a mother." You paused for a moment. "But, my father said that she was a kind and gentle woman, he loved her very much."

Loki nodded as he listened to you.

"She would have been friends with your mother I think, had she ever met her." You smiled softly and stopped walking to gently graze your fingers against the petals of a rose. "This flower is from Midgard, yes?"

Loki nodded, and when you looked at him you saw something kinder in his expression, and his eyes were softer than before. "How have you been handling it?"

"Handling what?"

"Having to be by yourself." He said carefully as he looked at you.

"Well, it was hard at first, I'll admit. The orphanages in Asgard are no place for a child to grow up in. And the children weren't kind either, since I was more fragile than they were. But I survived well enough by being clever." You explained, then shook your head. "I'll never understand why our culture idolizes brute strength as much as it does." You said with a roll of your eyes and Loki smiled a bit.

"How did you escape from it?" He asked as you two began walking again.

"From the orphanage? Well, after several failed attempts at escaping as a child, I finally realized that if I earned enough money, maybe I could buy myself a little home to live in. So I became the apprentice of a dressmaker, and once I was skilled enough, I earned money that way."

Loki nodded thoughtfully.

"I earned myself shelter, food, and thusly, my freedom. Oh, and Hammy, my horse." You chuckled, then stopped stiff. "My horse! Oh my goodness I'm a horrible owner, I need to go-"

Loki laughed softly at your sudden urgency and kept you from leaving by taking hold of your forearm. "Don't worry, I took care of that this morning. The guards found the horse and asked me if I knew who it belonged to. When I was informed that he wasn't wearing a saddle, I knew it was yours." He said with a half smile.

"Oh, thank you." You breathed a sigh of relief. "I should have known he would have come to find me. He escapes from his little stable sometimes if I'm gone too long. Where is he now?"

"He is in the royal stables, being attended to." He said as he let go of your arm.

You nodded with a grateful smile.

You two walked side by side for a while longer, enjoying the sun and the scenery. No one was out in the gardens today, which made the walk that much more peaceful.

After a bout of thinking, Loki asked, "Why did you name him Hammy?"

You beamed with pride as you answered him. "He is named after Hamlet."

"Ah, yes, I remember reading that Midgardian play." Loki smiled. "Good choice."

You grinned and looked up ahead at a hedge maze with a playful gleam in your eyes.

Loki followed your gaze with a smirk. "Do you wish to explore it?"

You could not contain your enthusiasm and nodded quickly. "It looks like so much fun! I've always wanted to wander about in a hedge maze, but I fear I will get lost if I do."

"Don't worry, I will find you." Loki said earnestly as you both neared the entrance of the maze. "I used to play in this labyrinth as a child. I also used it to hide from Thor's friends." He chuckled.

"Will you walk through it with me?"

"I will." He said. "But, I will enter from the opposite side. I thought we could make it more interesting by making a game out of it." He smiled.

"Alright, what's the game?"

"I will try to find you in the maze at the same time that you are trying to escape it. If I find you, I win, if you escape, you win. Simple really."

You nodded. "And what will I get when I win?"

"If you win," Loki smirked. "I will owe you one favor. And when I win, you will owe me one."

You gave him a competitive half smile. "I agree to these terms."

Loki nodded once. "Good. And since I have the advantage of knowing the maze, I will give you a five minute head start."

As soon as he finished speaking, you zoomed off into the maze, hearing him laugh happily from behind you.

It was more confusing actually being inside the maze, you soon found out, because this labyrinth had multiple dead ends, and loops. Two of which you encountered within the five minutes allotted, and you began to map off the places you had already been to in your mind.

Time was passing by quickly, and it made you a little nervous knowing that Loki was probably looking for you in the maze by now.

You had just came out of a dead end and walked back to the center when you heard someone yell. It sounded like Loki.

"Loki..?" You asked carefully, he was known for his tricks after all.

When you received no answer, you started to get worried. "Loki?!"

Still no answer.

You frowned, and hurried through the various passages to try and find him. "Loki?! Answer me, please, I'm worried!"

You turned the corner of a hedge. "Loki...? Ah!" You shrieked. He was shrouded by snakes, sitting on the floor with his eyes closed. The slender beasts slithered around him, hissing, as their razor sharp tails attempted to cut through his armor, and slice all exposed skin.

You slowly approached him, but the reptiles hissed at you and a few whipped their tales in warning. You jerked back in fear.

"Go.. it's too late.." Loki groaned, then slouched limply while more snakes slithered out of the walls of the hedge and completely surrounded his entire body.

You did not know if the snakes were venomous or not, but you didn't care about your safety at this point. Your friend was hurt, and you needed to help him. Shock finally succumbed to determination.

You lifted up your dress to get the dagger that you kept in your garter belt, and unsheathed it from the small leather pouch. You grabbed the first snake and when it snapped its jaws, you sliced off its head. You continued this process over and over, sometimes getting cuts and scrapes, but luckily, never a bite.

Finally, after killing several snakes, Loki was free. But he wasn't moving.

His hands were riddled with gashes and bites, and all along his neck and face there were the same injuries.

You put away your knife and focused all of your attention on him. "Loki?"

You knelt down beside him and held up his drooping figure by sitting next to him and putting your arm around his back, his head leaning against yours. "Loki, please wake up." You whimpered with worry.

He made a low groan and slowly opened his eyes as he lifted his head.

Your eyes lit up and you took out your handkerchief to dot away some of the blood dripping from a cut on his lip. "Come, I will take you to the healers right away."

Loki shook his head half heartedly. "I'll be fine."

"Stop it Loki." You said sternly. You could tell that it was his pride talking. "We are going, now."

He turned his head to look at you and saw that your eyes were filled with tears. "Alright." He consented meekly.

You nodded and kept a firm grip on him as he also put in an effort to stand, as much as his injuries would allow. You strained to keep him upright, as you pushed your palm against the hedge, to try and exit right through it, but to no avail, it was made of more than just vegetation. Branches were intertwined all throughout each wall, and you heard hissing when you got too close. It was also much too tall to try to climb. So, with great effort, you two headed back to the center of the maze.

Loki could see in your expression that he was probably much too heavy for you to be lifting. Your strong willed mind did not always match up with the limitations of your body, it seemed.

"Please, _____, just have someone come get me. It's.. it's.." He drifted off. His mind was wandering, you could hear it. Those snakes must have been venomous.

"No Loki. I can't, we're in a maze." You said as you continued to help him walk. "No one would be able to find you." You whimpered out a sigh of desperation as you struggled.

Loki said nothing, his eyes were glazed over, and his steps were uneven at times.

After a while, you were met by a crossroad in the maze and did not know which way to go. "Loki? Do you remember which way?" You asked him through winded breath.

"I don't.. I don't.."

"Loki, please, try to concentrate if you can." You pleaded, not knowing if you could find your way out on your own.

"The.. middle." Was all he managed to say. His breathing was ragged now.

You said no more and headed for the center path. His weight was getting more and more difficult to support the longer you walked. You could feel a burning sensation in your legs and a pain in your back. You focused on Loki instead.

After a time, Loki was just barely able to keep his eyes open and move one foot in front of the other. "Loki, stay with me, please."

"Pain... I'm in pain..." Was all he uttered.

"I will get you to safety Loki, I promise. No more pain." You assured, feeling warm tears fall down your cheeks.

You were almost out of the maze, you could sense it, but now Loki was no longer unable to give you any direction.

You could either go left, right, or straight. You chose left, and hoped for the best. You walked with him along this path with hope that this would lead to another area. You walked further through the green surrounded path until.. you were met with a hedge wall. It was a dead end.

You nearly broke down. You were exhausted, and you feared for Loki's life. He might not make it much longer. His breaths were labored, and sweat was dripping from his forehead. His skin felt hot and he was getting heavier each second that he lost his strength.

You took a deep breath and turned around. "There is still time." You asserted, and made a different choice than before.

As you walked, and turned, you were not met with any more dead ends. Thusly, you quickened your steps, faster, and faster, as adrenaline pumped through your veins, giving you strength that you were sure you didn't possess ordinarily.

Then, you could see the gardens again. The maze ended, and you walked out.

You had no time to feel relief. You still needed to find help, or get him to the healers yourself. You dug deep within yourself to find the energy to continue, as the adrenaline began to wear off, and you started to feel how incredibly tired you were.

Loki hadn't said anything in a long time. You only heard the sounds of his ragged breath, and hisses of pain.

You saw his mother walking out to the garden and screamed with all your might, "MY QUEEN! LOKI IS HURT!"

You fought to catch your breath from the exertion, while Queen Frigga quickly recruited a few guards and hurried over to you.

Loki did not seem to comprehend what was going on when the guards were helping him up.

"It's alright Loki." You assured, then doubled over trying to catch your breath, suddenly feeling very nauseous.

The Queen looked at her son with concern as the guards rushed him to the healers, then came over to you.

You appreciated her kindness, but you didn't want anyone to see you like this. Especially the Queen.

Your body ignored your pride however, and exhaustion brought you to your knees. You focused on your breathing, while tears threatened to spill.

Queen Frigga looked at you with a motherly gaze and knelt down beside you. "It's over now."

Those three words opened the flood gates and not even your pride could stop you from weeping right there on the grass.

The gentle Queen put her hand on your back to comfort you, while you bent over and sobbed, finally expressing the fear and worry you carried for what felt like an eternity.

You eventually were able to calm yourself down by focusing on your breathing for a while.

You wiped away your tears, and looked up at the Queen. "We should go to him, he is in pain." You said with a sniffle.

Frigga smiled softly. "It is admirable how much you care for my son, but he will be alright, thanks to you. Otherwise, I would have left with them. But you need your rest. Take your time, and when you feel stronger, we will see him together."

You nodded slowly, and inhaled the fresh air.

"I will fetch you a glass of water." Frigga said kindly, and left.

You felt horrible allowing the Queen to fetch you anything, but you were far too tired to move at the moment, and you needed water badly.

"Here you are." Frigga said when she returned promptly.

"Thank you, my Queen." You said, then took the glass from her and slowly drank the water. When you finished, you said, "I am feeling well enough now. I wish to see Loki."

Frigga nodded and helped you stand, then took the glass from you and helped you walk as she lead you back inside the palace, and to the healers room.

Loki was lying on a golden slab with people tending to him. He was shivering violently and his skin glistened with sweat. His armor had been taken off, so he only wore a thin, green shirt, and his leather pants.

"L-Leave me alone!" He shouted at the healers tending to him, while one of them spoke to Frigga. All you heard was that since he was bitten several times, they'd had to carefully increase the dosage of the antidote or else the antidote itself might have killed him. They were surprised he wasn't dead already, but Queen Frigga was confident. "My son is very strong."

You heard no more of their conversation however, because Loki was trembling in fear of a hallucination that was torturing him. "It's burning me! Someone do something!"

You held his hand and his eyes darted to you.

The longer he looked at you, the calmer his breathing became, until just his hand was trembling in your grasp. You stood closer to him and brought his warm hand up to your cheek. "I'm here, don't worry Loki. If something were hurting you, I'd slice its head off, just like those snakes."

His lips quirked up to a small smile.

"They are just illusions. I promise." You said, and kept your eyes locked on his, so he would know your sincerity.

He smiled more fully this time. "I know." He said weakly. "..Thank you." He closed his eyes, and you looked at one of the healers with questions evident in your expression.

"It is good that he is able to sleep, we haven't been able to calm him since he arrived here. The antidote will do its work, and since his heart rate and fever are normalizing, he should be alright."

You breathed a sigh of relief, but never let go of his hand.

Queen Frigga came to you and smiled gratefully. "You saved my son's life."

"And my own.. Loki is my only friend. I haven't had someone care about me in any way since my father died.." You admitted quietly.

Frigga nodded in understanding. "You are good for each other. And this will only grow your relationship, I am sure."

You nodded, and rubbed Loki's hand with your thumb tenderly as you held it.

"I only wonder how this happened.. How many snakes were there, maiden?" Queen Frigga asked.

"At least twenty for certain." You replied. "Is it common to have that many snakes in the garden my Queen?"

She shook her head thoughtfully. "No. That is why I'm worried.."

Chapter Text

Many hours past; and many people came and left the healing room. You had only left Loki's side once; to get a book to read in one hand, while you held Loki's in another. You were now seated on a chair beside Loki, with your book on the counter for now.

You had been assured almost hourly by various people, that Loki would be alright, but you could not bare to leave him. You would not be able to relax knowing he was in here and you were not with him, anyway.

The Queen entered the room for the second time since she first came in, and recommended that you get some sleep. You'd had a long day.

You looked surprised; you hadn't realized how late it was. "I will, my Queen." You assured, never releasing Loki's hand from your own. You were not lying, you would probably end up sleeping here..

Queen Frigga could see through your half truth, however. "You ought to rest in one of the palace chambers. Loki will still be here in the morning." She smiled gently.

You nodded. "I will, I just want to stay with him a while longer."

Frigga nodded. "We will find out who did this to him, I assure you."

You nodded again, and looked up at her. "Did you come because you were worried for him as well?"

She smiled kindly and shook her head. "I love my son dearly, but he is well now. I was concerned for you, maiden."

You took a deep breath, then exhaled, and turned your gaze towards Loki again. "The incident frightened me. I have felt the pain of loss, and its long term effects. I do not want to lose someone I care about again."

Frigga looked at you with caring eyes, then smiled. "Then you have chosen the right person to love." She headed for the door. "He is resilient." Said she, with a happy smile, then left you two alone.

You smiled softly, then took in the room. The pale blue moonlight streamed into the healing room through a crystal clear window, making everything within it glow.

Loki looked so innocent and serene as he slept. His body was relaxed, and his lips were pouted slightly.

You knew logically that he was perfectly fine, and that you were worrying too much, but you couldn't help it. It was only natural after you had experienced something as nerve wrecking as you did.

Your eyes cast off to the lovely gilded window to the right of where you sat. All of Asgard was asleep no doubt.

You felt Loki's hand shift in your grasp. When you looked at him, you saw his eyelids flutter open and he smiled gently once he saw you.

"How are you feeling?" You asked him quietly.

"Alright." He replied, and began to sit up.

"Please Loki, you need your rest." You insisted.

He gave a breathy chuckle. "Ehehe.. I am fine, I assure you."

"Please rest." You said, giving him your sweetest doe-eyes.

He looked at you for a while, then smiled gently as he finally succumbed to your charms. "Just as you say." He consented, and laid back down. "Have you eaten since this morning?" He inquired.

You tried to remember if you had. "No. But I had an adequate breakfast."

"You must eat, my Lady."

You shook your head. "I will be fine Loki, but thank you. And, I am afraid you've forgotten that I do not hold that title."

"Not yet, but I will ensure you are granted it after you saved my life today. Now, fetch yourself nourishment, then sleep in your chambers." He commanded, with the best of intentions.

You shook your head. "Loki I don't-"

"You will do well to listen to me."

"But Loki I-"

He suddenly grunted in pain, and shut eyes, his hands clenched into fists.

"Loki, what's wrong?! How can I help?" You asked with haste.

"I think.. I think if you.. took care of yourself, I would feel better." Loki said with a playful smirk, opening up one eye to look at you.

Your worry vanished, and you were left half-smiling at the bodacious prince for being so cunning. "Oh, fine." You appeased him with a laugh. He grinned up at you with both eyes open.

As his gaze lingered upon you, his expression softened, and his smile turned from one of satisfaction, to one of fondness. Loki slowly sat up from his position, his porcelain skin beaming in the light blue light. He extended his hand towards you and cupped your cheek with his cool hand and gently grazed your skin with his thumb. "Thank you, my Lady, for what you have done today. I am in your debt."

Your mind went blank as you looked at him, you had never seen him so sweet before. "You do not owe me anything Loki I-"

"Oh come now, there must be something you want." He smiled as he looked directly into your eyes, both of you completely captivated by each other.

"Well.. I would like to stay in the palace if that is possible."

"It shall be done." Loki said with a smirk and slowly brought his hand back down to his side. "Now, take care of yourself. I will see you in the morning."

You nodded. "Would you like me to help you to your chambers?"

Loki shook his head. "I can handle it I think."

"Alright. ...Good night Loki." You said with a pleasant smile, then walked to the door, and turned to look at him once more.

He bowed slightly from his position. "Good night, _____."

Chapter Text

The following morning you awoke early and had plenty of time to think about the events of the day prior as you cleaned up and got dressed for whatever adventures would occur.

You wore an elegant gown that flowed down to the floor with a blush colored underlay that reminded you a bit of the garden. You still loved that beautiful place, despite the terror the maze had caused...

There was a gentle knock on your door.

"Come in!" You invited, as you were dressed for company.

It was Queen Frigga. "Maiden _____, we may have discovered who was responsible for Loki's injury, and my husband has requested that he see you in the throne room with the others."

You nodded. "Right away my Queen."

She lead you down the grand hallways of the palace until you reached the throne room. King Odin was seated at his throne, and beneath the steps of the golden seat was Thor on his right, and Loki on his left.

As soon as you caught sight of Loki, you walked over to him, forgetting all manners and order necessary when in the presence of the King of Asgard. Nothing else seemed to matter once you saw Loki, and the Prince seemed to smile at the thought.

He looked more tired and pale than usual, but he was basically well, and somewhat happy now that you were with him.

Suddenly aware of your bad manners, you looked at King Odin, who was very irked, but one glance from his wife, and he soon became more subdued.

Loki looked down at you with a gentle smile, then became serious as the business at hand came to light.

"How many snakes did you see, maiden?" Odin asked you professionally, with calculating eyes.

You took a second or two to strengthen your confidence, then responded clearly, "At least twenty, my King."

Odin nodded thoughtfully. "Do you recall their appearance?"

You nodded. "Yes. They were all black, except for a single stripe of yellow down their backs. A few of them had a stripe of light blue."

Odin sighed loudly, as if disappointed about something, then addressed Thor. "One of the staff informed me that you had been to the glass garden recently. Do you deny this, on your honor?"

Thor looked down. "I do not deny this father but-."

Neither you nor Loki could believe what you were hearing.

"Do you or do you not also deny that you had taken the snakes from the glass house?" Odin asked with an unyielding stare.

Thor shook his head. "No father.. I do not deny this either."

Odin leaned back in his chair, his expression somewhat surprised, and disappointed.

"How could you do this to your brother, you could have killed him!" Frigga exclaimed sternly.

"Perhaps that was the goal." Loki remarked coldly.

Thor glared at him for even suggesting that he would attempt such a crime. "I did not mean to harm you Loki. You know this."

Loki rolled his eyes. "Then why did you do it? Mischief has always been my nature, not yours."

Thor looked reluctant and a bit embarrassed. His eyes darted to you for only an instant before he responded. "You are always trying to make me a fool. I wanted you to see how it was on the other side of it but-"

"So you used venomous snakes?!" Loki argued, while you looked up at him, concerned that he was exerting too much energy after what happened yesterday.

Thor looked away from the two of you for a moment then addressed Loki again. "I did not know they were venomous brother, I never meant to harm you the way I have, I swear!"

Loki narrowed his eyes while Thor looked remorseful. "I am sorry for the harm that I have caused you."

Odin leaned forward. "An apology will not be enough. A good king must have a vast knowledge in order to rule his people. You will begin this learning by studying each species of snake throughout the universe. You will be tested at the end of the week and if you fail you will begin the lessons anew until you succeed. Understand?"

"But father-"

Odin growled at him. "GO!"

Thor frowned and left the room as his father had asked.

You stared at Odin, appalled. As did Loki. He opened his mouth to speak, but you interjected. "That's it?!"

Odin frowned, not understanding your meaning.

"That is his punishment?! Learning about the snakes that could have killed Loki? And myself?"

Odin stood up just as Loki grabbed your forearm.

Odin was insistent. "Thor's intentions were not malicious, and Loki should learn not to cause so much "mischief" as he calls it. It hurts others, and in the end, it hurts himself as well."

You clenched your jaw tightly, while Loki kept a grip on your arm, knowing that if you crossed Odin, the ramifications could be terrible for you.

"We are done here." Odin declared, and pounded his staff against the ground to signal to the guards to open the doors.

Frigga sighed deeply, and kept quiet as she looked at her husband, while Loki lead you out of the throne room.

As soon as the guards closed the doors, you let out your anger. "I absolutely cannot believe this! I can't!"

Loki fought back a smile.

"Oafs! Both of them! No, worse than that!" You ranted. "And Thor is supposed to be king?! KING?! He acts like a child and has none of the qualities of what a good king ought to be. Doesn't anyone else see how utterly ridiculous this is?!"

Loki stopped your exclamations by pulling you into a tight hug.

It was startling to be so close to him so suddenly, but soon you relaxed, as he held onto you. You could sense how incredibly happy he was, but you could not understand why. Never the less, you did not dislike this closeness with him, and did reciprocate his affection. "What did I say?" You chuckled, as he pulled away gently with a smile.

"All the right things." He smirked, then held your hand and lead you away from the throne room.

You found it quite curious how affectionate he was being, but you in no way wanted to ruin your luck by remarking on it quite yet. "Where are we going now, Loki? To play a trick on Thor I hope. He deserves it." You grumbled unhappily.

His small smile turned into a grin, and he licked his lips to try to hide it. "Not yet my friend. Not yet."

"Ooo, I love the word yet in your statement." You said with a certain light in your eyes.

He laughed. "I never thought you'd be one for that sort of thing."

You feigned offense. "My character is perfectly in tact, thank you very much."

He hummed happily, and glanced at you a moment while you walked.

"It's only mischief. You know all about that, I'm sure." You teased.

"That I do." He smiled, and let his gaze linger on you for a bit longer. "I still do not understand why you... fought so hard to keep me alive." He said honestly and stopped walking for a moment.

You looked up at him with a darling smile. "You are my friend. My only friend, and a person whom I care for a great deal. It may sound silly saying this so soon in our relationship but.. I really do care about you Loki. I have never been one to take long to do so, given the right person of course."

He nodded once in gratitude and understanding. "I am very happy to have met you." He smiled kindly. "Very happy."

You looked up at him sweetly. "I am too. Life was quite lonely without you. And dull." You added.

"Mmm." Loki hummed, then took your arm in his and began walking again, until you were out of the palace.

"You never answered my question." You remarked with a small smile.

"Which one was that?"

"Where are we going?"

"Ah yes." He said easily, and walked for a few more minutes in silence. Both of you now walked across a field of grass.

"Well..." You chuckled softly. "Aren't you going to tell me?"

"There is no surprise in telling you everything. I prefer you to be amused when you are with me." He smirked.

"And why do you wish for me to be amused?" You asked him with a questioning glance.

"So that all others you interact with will be dull in comparison." Loki explained.

"You wish all others to appear grey beside your array of vibrant colors?"

He stayed quiet for a moment, with a satisfied smile present on his lips, then he spoke. "Yes."

"And why is that?"

Loki chuckled deeply, just as you two entered the royal stables. "Whatever answer you deem logical is probably the correct one." He said with a mysterious gleam in his blue-green eyes.

Chapter Text

It was not long before you were both saddled on your horses, trotting away from the stables.

You sat side saddle on your horse, Hammy, while Loki rode in front of you on his black steed. The regal prince turned his head to look at you once you were right beside him and had a certain smile present on his lips that you just could not comprehend. It was sneaky, but playfully so.

Your expression clearly displayed your confusion, but he only smiled more.

His posture was upright, confident and comfortable, and although he held a certain amount of strength when around his family, often times, you could sense his hesitation, his uneasiness around them. Now, he looked powerful and elegant, and although you cared for him in all respects, something about seeing him so incredibly comfortable made a warmth spread through your chest that you could not explain. His black hair was loosely slicked back and his skin nearly glowed, despite him knocking at deaths door a few days before. Frigga was right, he was resilient.

"I challenge you to a race, my Lady." Loki said suddenly, bringing you out of your realm of thought and into reality.

"A race to where?"

He jerked his head up slightly as if to motion in front of him. "Forward, until you reach the stream."

You looked at where he described, then set your eyes back on him. "Alright." You said, and swung your legs so you no longer sat side-saddle, not caring about any social taboo's at the moment.

Loki smirked as he looked at you, his eyes gleaming with mischief. "Starting... now!" He snapped the reigns and sped off towards the trees, leaving you to stand idle for a moment or two in shock, before you came to your senses and encouraged Hammy to sprint.

The wind rushed through your hair with a powerful blast, as Hammy sprinted his fastest, clearly very determined to beat the so called stronger mare. It took everything within you to simply hold onto the reigns as the force of the air pushed against you.

"Don't strain yourself too much now Hammy." You said. You had never seen Hammy so competitive before.
The scenes of greenery blurred past in your peripheral vision, until it was somewhat interrupted with black. You had caught up to Loki.

Loki looked to the right of him and saw you, hovering over the front of your horse, and donning a rather arrogant smile of premature victory. He blinked a few times, and if you hadn't been so influenced by Hammy's determination to win, you might have sworn his eyes shown affection for a moment.

But the thrill of the instance blinded you to this fact, and on you went, encouraging your trusted horse to move faster until you finally saw the river Loki had spoken of, and pulled on Hammy's reigns to a halt. Loki came in soon after, and dismounted before he came to your side, and held his hand out to you respectfully.

You allowed his help, and hopped down from your horse.

"Well done, my Lady." Loki said with a charming smile. "You have bested me."

You chuckled. "I have a feeling you do not admit your defeat very often."

"Indeed, I do not." Loki agreed, never releasing your hand from his warm fingertips.

You simply smiled, and he escorted you towards a particular area he had in mind, while you fixed your dress with your free hand. "Although it is very flattering that you, the Prince of Asgard, refer to me with the title of a Lady, I would rather you address me simply, by my name."

"And why is that?" Loki asked, looking down at you, with a tuft of silky black hair fallen out of place.

Your eyes drew upwards with sweet fondness. "Because you are my friend." You moved your hand to tuck the rouge piece back in place, then held his hand once again. "And I care for you. There is nothing near formal in that."

He took in a breath and turned away from you, though you felt that it was not in spite. "I agree wholeheartedly." He said in a quieter voice. You walked together for a few more minutes in an agreeable silence, hands still interlocked.

Loki's demeanor was now alert and aware. He appeared to be searching for something. "Ah ha." Said he after several minutes, while you two stood in a green, blue, and sparkling golden forest.

"I never realized how beautiful it is here..." You said honestly. Despite having walked all that way through the lovely place, you had been too focused on Loki to have noticed.

Loki smiled a bit, then looked at the large tree he had brought you to. "Do you trust me, _____?"

His question took you by surprise, but you did respond in the affirmative.

Loki pressed on. "You really trust me? Honestly, and purely?"

You nodded. "I trust you Loki. You haven't given me a reason not to."

He seemed pleased. "Good. Then keep a tight grip on my hand, and allow me to lead you."

You frowned, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "But why?"

He clicked his tongue in disapproval, and shook his head. "Trust me."

You paused for a moment, and took a step closer to him. He tilted his chin up slightly with a confident air as you examined him.

"As I said, I trust you."

He eyed you with an audacious smile. "Excellent."

Before you could rethink your decision, he yanked on your hand and rammed you both into the solid tree.
...

You both vanished.

Chapter Text

The stretching, pulsing, and pulling lasted for almost a minute, then both it and blinding light subsided. You still felt Loki's hand holding your own tightly, as your eyes adjusted.

"I found this place a long time ago. It is one of the many portals that even Heimdall knows nothing of." Loki said with pride, just as you were finally able to see where you were.

It was a humid jungle, with rich greens, a huge canopy of trees, and sounds of wildlife echoing all around you. "What realm is this?"

Loki guided you forward as he admired the scenery. "I do not know. But it is beautiful." He said with a breathy voice, filled with happiness. He looked at you when you let go of his hand, and watched as you sauntered over to a large tree and ran your hand along the trunk of it. Your fingers glided against each groove. Then you knelt down to touch a small plant, whose leaves were silky and green. You looked awed by a tiny insect that flew away from its initial resting place on the leaf. Its wings were swirled with color.

You stood up, and sprinted forward through a mess of vines and vegatation, wishing to explore. You could hear Loki's bootsteps behind you.

You weren't used to having someone follow after you when you ran off somewhere. It felt kind of nice. And you had a feeling that Loki did not usually chase after anyone. You wondered what made him inclined to do so.

Your flat soled shoes pattered against the moist ground eagerly, and you heard Loki's charming laugh from behind. You looked up at the umbrella of treetops as you ran, unaware of anything else, until suddenly something wrapped around you and jolted you back against something firm. You discovered that it was Loki's arms holding you against his chest.

"What's the matter?" You asked curiously, feeling how tense Loki was.

"Loki?"

"Look to your right." He whispered in your ear.

You did so and saw a very powerful and beautiful creature on four legs. Its eyes were fierce and its fur was black and orange, it was far enough not to frighten you, but close enough to warrant Loki to stop you.

"It's beautiful.." You whispered back.

"We musn't disturb it." Loki said quietly, and let go of your waist, then held your hand. "Besides," Said he, after you had reached a certain distance. "I wanted to show you something."

You were nearly giddy with excitment. Loki could feel the energy flowing through you, and smiled purely.

"What is it?" You asked.

"You'll see." He said happily and lead you through the forest until you reached a large tree house in the canopy of a tree, with stairs spiralling down to the ground.

"Did you build this?" You asked in awe.

"Over the course of a few hundred years, yes. Come, I'll show you inside."

He gently held your hand and lead you up the stairs, keeping close to you to ensure your safety while you climbed higher.

When you had reached the top, he lead you through the small building and opened the doors to a balcony. There, you could see nearly the entire forest of creatures and beautiful plants. The large sea of trees were stretched out as far as you could see. Loki stood beside you and looked at the view as well, a small smile on his lips as he did so, yet his eyes were sad.

You looked up at him with a fond smile, and he returned it ten fold.

------------

Hours had passed and you two had hardly noticed that it was now very late at night. You two were sitting on top of a soft throw rug in the treehouse, legs crossed, sitting across from eachother, deep in conversation.

"So then," Loki laughed as he relayed the story to you. "I created the illusion of an even bigger beast and the cowardly thing ran off!"

You gasped in astonishment. "You frightened a bilgesnipe?!"

"Indeed I did." Loki said, his chest puffed out with pride.

You grinned. "How exciting!"

"And of course no one was there to see it, so when I told Thor the story he insisted that I was lying!"

"How dare he distrust his own brother!"

Loki shook his head. "He knew I was telling the truth. He has always been gullible. But he simply could not admit that I achieved something that he never could." Loki huffed.

"He does have a lot of pride doesn't he?" You sighed. "Perhaps he will change, with the right circumstances."

Loki nodded. "I hope so. He may be an oaf, but he is my brother, and I don't want him to go into battle one day and get himself killed because of his ego."

"He'll learn, just give him time." You assured.

Loki nodded, then changed the subject. "What about you _____, have you any stories to tell?"

You blushed slightly in embarassment. "I'm afraid there aren't many.. But, I have made up a lot of stories." You smiled, and got comfortable by leaning against a wall.

Loki sat beside you, and followed suit. "I'd love to hear one, if you wouldn't mind."

You smiled sheepishly. "Alright..."

You thought of all of the stories you have created and decided on one. You took in a breath and began. "Once, there was a happy little bird who loved to fly, it was more than just a necessity to him. The other birds would fly to get food but he would fly.. to escape."

Loki looked intruiged, and seemed to gently lean against you without noticing.

You continued. "He hated just surviving. He wanted more! He wanted an adventure, freedom, and most of all, love. He didn't want a mate just for the sake of following order. Because of these things, he remained alone for a long time."

Loki's eyelids began to droop at the sound of your soothing voice, having never felt so incredibly safe before.

You yawned softly and fought to stay awake. "One day, the bird was caught by a large creature with no feathers. This creature clipped his wings and kept him in a cage. Until a female bird found him one day and took him away. She carried him with her small feet and flew him higher than he could have ever dreamed, and they were very happy together... The... End."

You yawned again, then wrapped your arms around Loki's torso and snuggled close to him as you fell asleep.

The last thing you heard was Loki's steady breathing, and the twitter of nocturnal birds in the trees.

Chapter Text

Small drops of rain water splattered against the roof of the wooden tree house and a rumble of thunder in the distance began the ripple of lucidity within you. The croaking frogs and echo of squawking birds carried you the rest of the way. You rubbed your eyes then slowly moved away from Loki, a little embarrassed that you had slept that way the entire night. You took a deep breath and sighed, then truly looked at Loki for the first time that morning. He was peaceful as he slept, with a piece of his soft black hair fallen over his face sweetly. You smiled gently, and held his hand. You felt a warm stirring within your chest as you did so, but felt shy when you saw him awake, and pulled away.

"Good morning Loki." You said nervously as he sat upright.

"Good morning." He said sleepily and yawned quietly.

As he changed positions you could see a moving creature on his shoulder. You narrowed your eyes and waited to get a better look at it. It was a snake. Without a second thought you whipped out your dagger and killed the dangerous creature before it could bite him.

Loki looked at you wide eyed.

"They have snakes here too?!" You exclaimed with a groan. "I hate snakes." You frowned.

Loki hid a chuckle and shrugged the limp reptile off of his shoulder easily. His eyes locked onto the dagger in your hand and he tilted his head curiously. "Where did you acquire that weapon?"

You looked down at your dagger then back up at Loki, and put the knife back in its usual spot as you spoke. "It was my father's, I keep it on my person at all times."

"And you threatened me with a butter knife because...?"

You shook your head and gave an airy laugh. "How long are you going to bring that up?"

"Until it no longer amuses me." He smirked.

You narrowed your eyes playfully, then explained. "My father made me vow to only use this dagger for food or defense. He said that, to kill someone with a dagger is shameful because you must be close to the person to hurt them. It is the ultimate act of betrayal, for, how can you manage to be that close to them if they did not trust you in some way?"

Loki nodded, intrigued by the concept. "And so... The butter knife was.. a loophole?"

"I suppose..."

Loki hummed thoughtfully.

"But I am no longer going to look for loopholes. My father was right, a dagger should only be used to defend, not attack."

"Certainly he did not disapprove of all weapons, however." Loki said curiously.

"On the contrary, being a blacksmith, he created many. But, they were for battle, not the underworld."

Loki nodded. "Of course."

The rain began to beat on the roof louder now, and the buzzing of insects died down. You felt drops of water fall on your head and looked up at the leaking roof.

Loki stood up, annoyed at the faulty roof, and yet unconcerned about it. "We'd better go back to Asgard."

You felt your heart seize up at the sudden realization of your predicament. Both you and Loki had been gone the whole night! What would people think? How could you have let this happen?!

"Loki-"

"It is only just barely dawn. No one will notice our disappearance, I am certain."

"Your mother might."

"If she does, I trust her enough to tell her the truth, now, we must be going, I'm afraid." He said, and extended his hand to you, then helped you up off of the floor.

By the time you were both back down on solid ground, the rain was violently gushing out from the dark clouds above. The heat was humid, and you noticed a mixture of sweat and water glistening on Loki's skin. Your dress was soaked, and clung to you a bit uncomfortably, and Loki looked very irritated by the stickiness of his wet, leather pants. The tight leather armor on his upper body was not helping to relieve it either. Every exposed material was covered with water.

His hair laid heavy on his head, and parts of it would sometimes find their way in front of his face, causing him to impatiently wipe it away.

All the while, Loki's cool hand held your own, as he lead you through the forest. The rain had caused both his and your hands to be somewhat slippery, so you held on tightly. He seemed to have a growing urgency to get home now, knowing that you would need to get dry before breakfast.

Finally, you made it to your point of origin, or you assumed so, since Loki had stopped walking.

For a while, there was nothing but the sound of rain, and the frantic noises of animals looking for shelter. Then the powerful drum of thunder would hit every once and a while.

"Loki?" You questioned, as you looked at him. He simply stared at where the portal no doubt was.

"_____." He said quietly, almost too soft for you to hear over the rain clinking like a million wind chimes in a summer breeze.

"Yes?"

He turned to face you and blinked a few times as he took in a nervous breath. Tiny drops of water formed on his lashes only moments after. "Before we go back to Asgard, there is something I.. I must tell you."

You nodded mindlessly as he cupped your cheek with a timid hand and tenderly pulled you closer to him. His tall form nearly shielded you from the rain as he hovered over you slightly to look into your eyes. "Yes?" You voiced kindly.

"I... um.." He exhaled shakily.

"It's alright Loki, what ails you?"

He sighed miserably, then gently rested his forehead against yours affectionately, and closed his eyes.

You closed your eyes as well, and felt your heart beat faster, while the thunder continued to roar. Time seemed to slow down in those moments, each second felt like a minute. All the while the rain poured down and the wild life gave voice to the forest. You had never been so close to him before, and yet, you didn't mind it, quite the contrary.

Unfortunately, the blissful moment did pass, however. He slowly pulled away and sighed. "The way you.. um... I just feel that you.." He gave another exasperated sigh.

My was he being meek. You had to admit, it was a little startling to see him this way. Loki was a remarkably unpredictable man.

He cleared his throat, and collected himself. "You are.. the best friend I have ever had, and um.. a-and.." He sighed, then seemed to cringe in frustration, before he resolved to a statement. "And I hope we are companions from here on forward."

You were not expecting the sunken feeling of disappointment in your chest upon hearing his words, it stung at first, for a reason that you hadn't thought of quite yet. But then you convinced yourself that nothing was set in stone, things change... "Thank you, Loki. I feel the same for you." You smiled.

Loki nodded, then sighed heavily, looking upset about something as well. "We'd better be leaving." He said halfheartedly, then lead you through the portal once again.

Chapter Text

Two people never raced faster to the palace than you and Loki had that morning. The horses galloped swiftly to carry you there, and you felt your heart thump nervously and your head spin with a million questions that you couldn't answer at the moment. You were confused about the closeness you shared in the forest of rain, you wondered if anyone knew you both were gone all night. You feared there would be scandalous talk that would smear your name forever. You worried-

"Stop it." Loki said once you dismounted and stood on the gold pavement.

"Stop what?" You questioned, nearly panting.

"Stop panicking. I've gotten out of worse scrapes than this." He smirked, always confident. How was he always like this? So cool, yet so hot headed, passionate, afraid, lonely... The more you thought about him like that, the more he seemed like an artist's masterpiece, an intricate person, unlike any other. Never to be replicated again.

You were silent, deep in this train of thought as he escorted you through the backways of the palace, he seemed to have the place memorized.

"They are probably having breakfast just about now. Luckily for us, I'm usually late anyway. Now, go get some dry clothes on and look presentable before you go to the dinning hall." Loki said, almost ordered you actually.

You gave him a look. "Really? Because I thought it would be quaint to go like this."

He did not seem amused by your sarcasm. "You're doing this now?"

"I do what I want Loki, don't try to hinder me." You stated defiantly, tilting your head up slightly and crossing your arms for emphasis.

He couldn't help but smile, and shook his head. "I would be a fool to try and tame you. But please, do as I say, just this once?" He said in a pleading tone to placate you.

You huffed air out your nose in a sort of half laugh. "Alright, just this once."

"Good."

As you two headed in different directions, you suddenly turned around, walking backwards. "You were the one that told me to lighten up you know!"

"No, I said not to panic!" His back was turned, but you could hear the fondness in his voice.

"This is how I don't panic!" You laughed, then hurried off into the hallway that lead to your room.

You didn't know that he had turned around to look at you before you had gone out of sight...

******

Breakfast was entirely too uncomfortable for you. For one thing, the entire royal family would look at you every once and a while when they thought you didn't notice, which, of course, you did, because you felt very self conscious at the moment. For another, you couldn't tell if any of them knew about you and Loki's adventure yesterday, and most importantly... Loki wasn't there. He wasn't sitting next to you, he wasn't even in the room. Where was he?!

"Did you sleep well last night maiden?" Thor asked. You couldn't define his tone, was it condescending? Neutral? Bored?

You sighed. Worrying was too much work. "Fairly. I accidentally left the window open and a draft woke me up in the middle of the night."

Slick lie.. Maybe you ought to be careful about how much Loki was beginning to influence you..

"Hmph." Thor grunted as he stabbed another piece of meat with his fork. "Not for long I hope."

"I beg your pardon...?" You asked meekly.

Thor swallowed his food then spoke. "I hope it did not keep you awake for long."

You blinked a few times, confused by Thor's somewhat polite behavior. "Oh.. um. Thank you." You smiled, and ate a small bite of your food.

Loki strode into the dinning hall far later than you had anticipated, with a confusingly confident air, considering the subtle death glare you were giving him for leaving you here to face them alone.

"Hello beloved family, and friend." Loki said with an all too fake grin, then sat beside you.

You just kept looking at him with an unwavering gaze.

He blinked a few times before he turned to look at you. "It's not polite to stare you know."

You gaped at him in disbelief, ignoring any questioning glances in your direction. You leaned back slightly, the shock dying down. "I'll teach you about etiquette later." You muttered under your breath.

He gave an airy laugh. "Ehehe.. Will you really?" He was teasing you, in that low, whispered voice of his, but you didn't take the bait.

"Oh yes." You nearly growled.

.....

"I really don't understand what all the fuss is about." Loki contended with a crooked smile, once you had left the dinning hall, he was following after you.

"Why weren't you there Loki? You knew how worried I was." You complained sharply.

"I told you, I have my reasons for everything, you must trust that."

"Oh must I?" You laughed. "And why is that?"

He quickened his steps and took a gentle hold of your arm so you would stop and face him. "Because you are my friend."

Those eyes, those darling eyes shined at you, pleaded you to give in. Trust me... Trust me...

"If I'm your friend then why can't you tell me why you did this?"

He sighed softly. "Just.. trust." He said, then placed a kiss on your forehead.

When you could see his eyes again, he looked surprised by his own action. He cleared his throat. "So.. I assume breakfast went well then?"

"You're not as funny as you think you are you know." You teased, and began walking again and he followed with long strides, a lopsided grin present.

"You're right, I'm funnier actually."

You couldn't help but laugh. "You act arrogant, but you've already proven you've got a soft side." You said with a knowing smile.

He smiled back, only his was sad, and faint. "...Only to you."

Chapter Text

The next five days were a bit difficult for you, since Loki was busy strategizing for the upcoming war and therefore unable to spend much time with you. Meanwhile, Thor was serving out his punishment of memorizing every kind of snake in existence.

You were incredibly bored without Loki, that snarky mischief maker. You would go to the library and read, as you used to do when you were bored back home, but your thoughts just kept wandering to the real life character Loki was. It made you smile to think about him, and you found yourself re-reading the same paragraphs over and over again, unable to concentrate.

Finding the activity to be useless, you put your book away and walked out of the library, where you saw said black haired prince, quickly walking down the halls. Probably off to his next meeting.

"Loki!" You called, unable to help yourself.

He stopped immediately, then smiled, and turned to face you. "Hello."

You swiftly walked up to him, and looked up into his eyes. You felt a warm fluttering sensation in your chest that made you want to wrap your arms around him and hold him close. But of course, you couldn't do that. Instead, you said, "I've missed you."

He smirked slightly. "Is that right?"

You nodded.

"But it has only been a few days." Loki said with true confusion.

"A few days is still too many." You admitted. "I've missed you." You affirmed.

His smirk softened to a sweet smile, then he gently held your hand in his and interlocked his fingers with yours. "I've missed you too."

You raised your eyebrows in happy surprise. "Really?"

He laughed softly, nervously. "Yes. Without you I'm surrounded by idiots!"

You chuckled. "It will be over soon won't it?"

Loki nodded. "Today is the last day."

You looked pleased. "Good. Because life is so dull without you."

He gently pulled you about a step closer to him with the hand that held yours. "Life is unbearable without you..." He murmured quietly, in a soft, intimate manner.

You looked up at him with blushed cheeks, unsure what to say as he looked at you in a way you had not seen before. Or perhaps.. never noticed. You wondered if Loki liked you in the way that you were beginning to like him.

"Prince Loki?" Said a guard who now stood beside you two, his voice was deep and serious.

Loki kept hold of your hand. "Yes?"

"The other Generals are waiting for you."

Loki sighed and looked at you one last time. His emotion filled eyes swept over every part of you with a gentle gaze, slow and steady. "I will see you tonight." Loki stated, and brought your hand up to his lips and kissed your knuckles a few moments longer than you had expected. Then he let go, and bowed to you before he left with the messenger.

You took in a deep breath and exhaled to steady the pounding drum of your heart. He often acted as though he were very interested in you, but you couldn't be sure if that was just his way. He seemed to like being dramatic. But something in his eyes told you that wasn't true. However, the dread in your stomach told you not to get your hopes up, lest you lose a good friend.

. . . . . .

You ate dinner with only the king and queen that night. It was an awkward evening indeed, without Thor or Loki to fill out the silence. It was over soon enough though, because you ate much less than they did, and Queen Frigga insisted that you need not wait for them to finish before leaving. So you thanked her graciously, and left.

There was a medium sized room in the palace, that you liked to go to sometimes. It had a shallow pit in the middle, where there were sofas all lined cleanly along the edge of the circle, connected to it. And in the middle of this curved line was a small fire pit, and beyond that was a large window that overlooked the bifrost, and the icy waters below caused by the melted ice of Jotunheim.

The evening light provided a spectacular view. The orange colors made the sky seem nearly golden, and the stars were beginning to gleam through the sky.

You sat there in the sunken area and tried to relax a bit as you heard the fire crackle in front of you. Then you closed your eyes with a small smile on your face, knowing that you would see Loki soon.

You heard the double doors open, but not the voice you wanted to hear.

"If I ever hear the word "snake" again, it will be too soon." Thor's booming voice echoed through the room as he and his friends entered.

You sighed softly. Well, it was nice while it lasted.

"It appears Loki's maiden is here." Volstagg said with a jolly tone. You looked up at him and realized that he was so happy because he had a leg of meat in one hand.

"She isn't Loki's maiden." Thor nearly growled, then sighed. "She is his friend."

Sif hopped down to your level and sat a ways away from you, the others following suit soon after. "You might as well consider her that Thor." Sif chuckled. "The way they look at eachother sometimes is enough to make a person sick."

You frowned, confused. "What makes you say so?"

Sif shrugged. "Observation. And besides that, he actually doesn't scowl around you."

"And he speaks!" Fandral chimed in, scooting right beside you, causing you to move an inch or two away.

"Where is he?" You asked, feeling the need to escape.

"Still busy with his training." Thor said gruffly, finally joining the others on the long sofa.

"Have you missed him?" Sif asked with a gentle smile, seeming to notice a familiar look in your eyes.

You smiled a bit as well, glad that she wasn't quite as cold as the others. "Yes."

She smiled wider and nodded. " 'Tis nice to have a lady around for once."

You simply chuckled.

"As the daughter of a blacksmith, have you ever been interested in the art of sword fighting?" Thor asked you, keeping a steady gaze in your direction.

You nodded. "Of course, but my father never liked the idea of it. He was afraid I'd volunteer to fight in the next draft."

"Come, I will teach you now." Thor stated, then rose up from his seat and stood in front of you, holding out his large hand for you to take.

You shook your head nervously. "No, that's alright, really."

Thor gave a charming smile. "I will not take no for an answer."

You looked uncertain, and glanced at Sif for guidance, who simply shrugged. "Umm.. Alright, I suppose." You agreed reluctantly.

Thor grinned wider and took your hand. "Good."

He put his hands on your waist and hoisted you up above the sunken area, then climbed up easily himself. You felt unsure about Thor's sudden need to be friendly with you. You had taught yourself to be naturally wary at a young age. It was what kept you safe during all those years of being alone.

"I will teach you the stance you will use when defending yourself." Thor said and stood beside you. "First, place your dominant foot forward, like this."

You mimicked his position then nodded.

"Then turn your hips to the side and keep your back foot shoulder-width apart from your front foot." Thor said, and showed you.

You followed his lead as best as you could, but he was unsatisfied.

"I will help you." Thor said gently and stood behind you, guiding your hips to the right angle with his hands. He then placed a foot underneath your legs to nudge your back foot into pointing to your left as opposed to forward.

It was in this position that you heard the golden doors open, and someone clear his throat.

"I see you're busy." Loki said stiffly.

You swiftly moved away from Thor to look at Loki, feeling guilty, even though you had no reason to feel so.

"Thor insisted he teach me the basics of sword fighting." You explained, pleading with your eyes. Trust me... Trust me...

Loki laughed mockingly as he took a few steps forward then gently took your hand and pulled you close to him. "Well.. if you want to learn how to do anything..." He mumbled deeply, much like he had earlier, and pulled you even closer. "You ought to learn it from me."

You felt your heart beat rapidly against your chest, unable to do anything other than take uneven breaths and stare at Loki's chestplate.

He slowly moved to kiss your forehead, and lingered long enough to make your cheeks burn. You didn't see the death glare he was giving Thor from above your head as he kissed you.

When Loki pulled away, he looked down at your flustered expression with a fond smile. "Did you miss me?"

"Yes." You whispered tenderly.

Thor clenched his fists and kept his jaw shut tight in jealous anger.

Loki smirked ever so slightly, satisfaction nearly gleaming in his eyes at the sight of something he hadn't thought he'd ever see before.

Loki had something Thor wanted, but could never have.

Chapter Text

You awoke the following morning with a yawn, and rubbed your eyes before sitting up on the plush bed. The sun just barely peeked through the curtains today. It was probably about time for breakfast, but you were neither hungry, nor willing to see a certain blonde haired prince.

He had acted so strange yesterday, you thought, and not the good strange either...

Because of course, there was a certain amount of Loki that some might say was weird, but you liked his sometimes chaotic quirks, they only made him more interesting to you.

You went down the hall a ways away to get washed up in the bathing room, then you got dressed and put your nightgown back in it's proper drawer in your room before deciding that you wanted to go exploring.

You had been nearly every place you could go in this large palace, but surely there had to be secrets within it that you had not yet found.

The thought of it excited you, and caused you to quicken your step as you wondered to yourself where you might hide a secret if you were of royalty.

You had searched the hallways, checked for stairs, but still, nothing. You were now in a small, round room, a bit like an indoor balcony, with paintings of the king and queen up above it.

You sighed softly. And, feeling defeated, you sat down on the floor, staring at the back wall.

Your eyes drifted up just a bit, and there you saw a little peephole of some sort. Curious, you looked through, and to your amazement, there was the unmistakable image of a sword and a shield, incased with red light.

You stepped away from the peephole and began feeling all along the intricate molding at the middle of the wall, until suddenly a small flower pushed in, and the wall before you began to slide away, to reveal a long, dark staircase, going straight up for a while then curving left.

You looked behind you to make sure no one else was there, then began climbing up the stairs. It didn't take too long until you reached the end, and there you saw a shield, giving off sapphire blue energy, and a sword, radiating golden swirls.

You took a few steps forward, to get a better look at the weapons when suddenly you felt something touch your shoulder and you jumped with a squeak.

"Ehehehe..."

You turned around swiftly to face the perpetrator. "Don't scare me like that Loki!" You said with a small smile, as you caught your breath.

"Then don't tempt me." Loki smirked, his blue-green eyes glimmering with amusement.

"What?"

"Look at you. Sneaking around where you oughtn't, clearly focused on your discovery, on edge because you might get caught. You practically begged me to frighten you." Loki argued with a confident smile.

You rolled your eyes and shook your head. "Alright, alright, your mischief aside, I'm curious to know what these things are."

Loki took a step forward and looked at the two items in the clear, enchanted case. "The sword is reserved for the first commanding general. And the shield is reserved for the second. It is to help them in battle."

You nodded and looked at the sword for a bit before looking at Loki. "Did my father use the sword?"

Loki's expression softened and he nodded. "Yes, he did."

You were quiet for a long time, thinking about your father and wondering what life would have been like if he hadn't passed away. "Loki?"

"Yes?"

You were hesitant to ask this, but you wanted to know. "How did my father die?"

Loki looked down at your hand and took hold of it, then brought you closer to him. "My father told me his story." Loki mentioned, and took a deep breath, then exhaled with a soft sigh. "He fought honorably to the very end. However, during battle, he was overtaken by a sword in the back, by the hands of Laufey."

Chapter Text

You spent the rest of the afternoon trying to forget about this new discovery involving your father's death. Initially, you had wanted to know the truth. Somehow, you had hoped it would hurt less than the vague details you were given when you were taken away to the orphanage, where you felt worthless and unloved. However the grim details did nothing to soothe your pain, and as Loki was otherwise occupied at the moment, you found a bit of comfort in simply sitting on the floor in the center of the royal library.

You closed your eyes and breathed in the unmistakable scent of old books and mahogany wood, then exhaled with a sigh.

You felt a few fingers tap your shoulder and your eyes shot open. When you spun around to face the person you had expected Loki.

"Greetings maiden." Thor said with a  warm smile.

"Oh.. hello." You said quietly as your shoulders sunk down in disappointment.

He seemed a bit uncomfortable upon hearing your tone, but apparently didn't perceive the correct meaning of it. "Am I disturbing your time of solitude?"

You frowned, confused. "No.. why?"

Thor rubbed his neck nervously. "That's what Loki says sometimes.." He said with a half hearted laugh.

You nodded with a small smile, understanding what he meant. "No, I was just relaxing."

He nodded. "May I... join you?"

You looked up at him, then out at the window anxiously. You really didn't want him to, but neither did you want to offend him..

He seemed to have made up your mind for you, however, and sat down beside you.

You had to admit, it was a little amusing to see him this way. A large man with bulky armor, sitting beside a woman in the center of a room that he probably spent little to no time in. You laughed airily at the thought of it, and he smiled brightly in response. "Do I amuse you?"

"A little, yes." You admitted.

"Why is that?" He asked with his head cocked to one side, like an eager, golden puppy.

You shrugged. "I guess because you seem out of place here."

He leaned back, feigning offense. "I'll have you know, that I am the finest reader in all the nine realms!" He boasted.

You looked at him in disbelief. "Uh-huh. Sure."

"I am!" He insisted with a playful smile.

"Alright then, prove it." You challenged. "Tell me who Dr. Watson is."

His shoulder sunk and his blue eyes were very confused. "He was a healer of some sort?"

"Nice work Sherlock." You smirked, but he only frowned, clearly disappointed that he hadn't impressed you. His sad expression was pitiful. "Now, don't look like that, we're just different that's all." You said with a kinder smile.

"Not so different that you won't dine with me tonight I hope." Thor replied, as he gently took your hand and kissed it.

You smiled sheepishly and carefully removed your hand from his grasp. "That's very kind of you to offer, but I don't want you to get the wrong impression as to what my intentions are."

"And what are your intentions, maiden?" He asked directly, though, with a bit of softness to his tone.

You stood up, and smoothed down your dress. "My intention is to be cordial with you." You said honestly, and left the room with a slight sway in your step, the confidence radiating off of you.

You could feel Thor's gaze on you as you left, but you didn't let it bother you too much.

A while later you found your thoughts returning to the somber subject of your father and you breathed out a sigh. Why was it that the darker memories, thoughts, emotions, were always stronger than any positivity that you tried to conjure?

Perhaps you hadn't found a happiness strong enough yet...

"Hello maiden." Thor's voice was a surprisingly welcome relief.

"Hello Prince Thor."

" 'Thor' shall suffice." The prince seemed very eager to please you.

"Hello Thor." You corrected with a gracious smile.

"How do you fare?"

You chuckled. "You mean, since we last spoke?"

He nodded, his blue eyes gazing at you with interest.

You smirked slightly as you two began to walk together without any planning. "What changed in you?"

Thor tilted his head to the side, curious. "How do you mean?"

"You didn't seem overly fond of me when we first met, and now you seem to be very comfortable talking with me. Why?"

The large man rubbed his neck nervously. "I apologize for my behavior when we met. I admit my pride was hurt when you spoke to me in such an aggressive manner in the defense of my brother."

"How could I not? You and your friends were so awful to him." You said with a scowl.

Thor stayed quiet for a while then looked out the window and gasped. "I am late!" He took your hand for the second time today and kissed it. "Forgive me maiden, but I must attend to my duties as Prince."

You nodded. "Is that what Loki is doing? I haven't seen him all day!"

Thor nodded. "I believe so. Good day." He bowed, then quickly walked off another direction.

* * * *

That evening, you had been walking back from the stables, after a peaceful ride on your trusted steed, Hammy, when suddenly you heard a loud clamoring from within the halls, followed by shouting.

"Do NOT disturb me when I am alone! You incompetent prat!"

You recognized the source of the voice and quickened your steps.

"Y-Yes my Prince, I apologize." Came the stuttering reply of the servant, and they scampered out from the library.

Once you entered the room, you looked at Loki with perplexity. "What happened?"

The ebony hair on the lean prince was slicked back, more precisely than you had ever seen. His clothes entirely put in their exact place. His boots were shiny, yet slightly scuffed from battle, and were snug on his feet, which were lying on top of a low wooden table. His eyes were intense as he focused on the page in front of him, his slender hand gripped the dark green binding a little too tightly. You had time to notice this because he hadn't looked up to see you, even after you spoke.

"Loki?" You called again, a bit more quietly this time.

Deftly, he turned a page, as if he had actually been reading this whole time. Of course you knew that he hadn't. He hummed to somewhat address your call.

"Are you.. alright?" You asked, perplexed and a little worried. Why was he acting so stiff?

"I am fine."

His smooth voice was devoid of the amusement you were accustomed to hearing. It was dull. It was numb.

"Are you sure?"

"I wish to be alone, so if you have no further business with me, I ask that you leave." Loki replied, never once looking up from his book.

Your initial reaction was to feel hurt by his rejection of your company. But, not wanting to assume anything too quickly, you thought that perhaps that his words weren't personal. You had been known to want some time alone as well, maybe that was the case for him too. "I understand." You said meekly, then curtsied, and left the room.

****

You felt lonely, and somewhat empty without Loki to walk beside you that night. You sighed sadly as your feet lazily took you towards the rainbow bridge. The cool air chilled your skin but did little to awaken your sunken heart. So many people have left you... You feared, deep down, that Loki was another one of those people. You tried not to let his slight rejection tonight affect you, but it did. Your relationship with Loki had been growing at a very steady pace, and had lured you into a sense of security you had promised yourself a million times that you'd never feel. But every time you failed. Every. Single. Time.

You relied on your logic to give you comfort, that he was just cranky or he just wanted a little space. But deep down you were convinced that you were only lying to yourself.

Midway through walking across the large, colorful structure, you sat down at the edge of it and scooted forward, letting your feet dangle off into the air. Your hands gripped the edge, and you closed your eyes, letting the wind lift your hair in every direction. You felt relaxed, at peace. The sounds of the roaring waves reached your ears with ease, and pushed away the silence...

****

Every night you asked Loki if he'd like some company, and every night he would tell you no. Then one evening, as you passed by the library, you reached to open the door, but thought better of it and walked away.

The fool I was to believe..

The afternoon following this incident, you had spotted Loki in the hallways, talking to a young maiden. She was giggling and he was grinning from ear to ear.

It burned you within your core to see him like this. As if he were displaying publicly how little he cared about you. He knew nothing of the pain you had felt for the past few days, and this little scene clearly showed that he was not concerned in the slightest about you.

You saw him put a hand on her back and you'd had enough. You walked up to them both and stood in front of them, shoulders back, eyes blazing. "Hello." You said venomously.

"Ah, hello Maiden _____." Loki spoke with sickening sweetness. "I would like to introduce you to-"

"Leave." You said to the girl with a horrible glare before he could finish.

She scattered off like a rat in the sewer.

You turned your attention back to Loki. "Why have you done this to me? As if your silence has not been enough to drive me mad with sadness, you parade this woman around to add to my wounds."

"Maiden," Loki began smoothly. "I apologize if I gave the impression that you meant more to me than any other companion. However, it is in my nature to have a little fun. Your "torment" will end as soon as you find yourself in the arms of the golden haired man. Which you will, no doubt." He surveyed your distressed state with cold eyes, then laughed.

You were incredulous. "How could you be so blind as to not see how I've felt for-"

"Your frazzled nature is do to your arrogance I suspect." He interrupted. "But do not worry, it will be quenched within moments, as if you could ever know what a broken heart felt like." He scoffed.

"Enough of your poisoned tongue." You snapped, then took a step closer, to look at him straight in the eyes. "You may leave me, forget me, forsake me. But don't you dare mock my pain."

You left without another word, or another glance in his direction.

Chapter Text

Loki's p.o.v

Her words struck a deep, painful chord within me. I completely understood what she meant when she so fiercely told me not to mock her misery. It was this connection that caused a remorse within me that I had never felt before in so sudden a way. But as she left me, all I could do is stand there, frozen and cold...

I paced my room. (I don't remember how I got there or how much time had passed.)

Back and forth I walked, my hands clutching my hair at times. I didn't want her to have this affect on me. Emotions so wild and untamable. Like me.

Like her.

I felt a heaviness in my chest, that I supposed must be longing. I had missed her. I didn't want to admit that at the time though, I didn't want to now either, but the choice wasn't mine anymore.

I was usually so good at lying. But with her... I couldn't believe the lies I told myself. But then again I had seen her with him. She was laughing, smiling...

Jealousy.

Green really did suit me didn't it? But it was justified. Wasn't it?

I growled angrily and knocked over a few books off of my shelf without care. I hated this.

How I had become so attached to her so quickly I hadn't the slightest clue. It happened so fast, and I had let her in so easily. I never did that. Not with anyone. Yet she always seemed so genuine. When she would look up at me, her eyes shone with such adoration I nearly felt compelled to.. to..

I knocked over an empty water glass.

I can't. I can't care about her. Her encounter with Thor reminded me of everyone else before her. How I used to be as a child. Giving love so easily, so quickly, only to be dismissed like a mutt. Was I really still just a starved child?

I didn't know. I didn't know about anything anymore. But still, deep within my chest, that yearning, that need for her to be beside me, came with a fire that I knew would never be quenched.

And so I moved towards the door to find her. But I stopped before I could open it. What if.. what if I was right?

What if I went to talk to her and she told me that she cared for me, yes, but she felt better connected to Thor, that she liked him better than me?

My hands clenched into fists, the images of them together made my blood boil. Why was I so angry?

"I shouldn't care!" I suddenly said aloud. "I should be numb! Cold, heartless, calculating! And yet my heart aches without her near me..." I sighed softly and slumped down against the door. A piece of my hair fell over my face limply. I sat there on my bum, looking ridiculous probably, wearing my cold metal and leather attire. I let my head thump softly against the wooden surface with another sigh. I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing. Perhaps if I brought her a gift of some sort she would be more inclined to-

"Idiot buffoon." I insulted myself for thinking so childishly. "Talk to her. Talk. Do you know how to do that? Act normal, be like Thor and- no. Forget that. Don't be like Thor, and talk to her. I'm good at that right?"

I stood up and faced the door, then grabbed the handle. My hand was trembling with anxiety. "Do anything but reject me." I begged, as if she could hear my pleas.

And after my pathetic groveling, I left to find the maiden who had somehow gained a hold of my incredibly fractured heart.

Chapter Text

You had taken to relaxing atop the rainbow bridge during the evenings that Loki might have spent with you. Tonight, you lay with your legs over the edge of the bridge, with a makeshift fishing pole in your hand, as the line fell down to the waters below. You had only heard of such creatures living on Midgard, however, it was fun just pretending like you might catch something. You closed your eyes and breathed in softly, letting your thoughts drift far away from Loki and his horrible behavior earlier today.

"You know you could fall lying that close to the edge..."

You opened one eye to see a black boot beside you. You sat up from your horizontal position just as Loki sat down beside you cross-legged.

"What do you care?" You mumbled, almost to yourself.

Loki sighed, and ran his fingers through his slightly disheveled hair to slick it back. "I.. uh.."

You set your fishing rod down beside you so you could turn your body slightly away from him. You pretended not to notice how his hands had jolted towards you to make sure you didn't fall.

"You really ought to sit back." Loki insisted, as gentle as lace, warmth in his voice.

"Why don't you fuss over your other "woman companion"? I'm sure she'd just love to giggle like an idiot some more." You couldn't help the bitterness in your voice. That hussy couldn't possibly care about him as fully as you did.

Loki looked at you curiously, then scooted closer to you, and wrapped a protective arm around your waist from behind. "You were... jealous?"

You tried to squirm away from him, but nearly fell in the process, causing him to tighten his grip around you with his strong arms, then pull you over to him, closer to the middle.

"Me? Jealous?" You scoffed, however your voice was weak. "I'd never.." Your eyes filled with cold tears despite your want and they slid down your cheeks when you blinked. He looked at you with compassionate eyes and gently wiped away a fallen tear with his thumb.

"Stop it Loki," You sighed. "I'm not your plaything."

"I don't understand."

"You told me that you were just having a bit of fun, pretending to care about me. You said that I was the same to you as any other companion. As if what we had, what we shared didn't-" Your voice had failed you, and you barely managed to quiet the sad whimper that had escaped your lips.

Loki gently touched your cheek with careful fingers, as if he were afraid to break you. You looked into his eyes as yours glistened with tears.

"Please don't cry..." He murmured tenderly, as his thumb glided across your skin slowly, back and forth, in a soothing motion.

"Why did you say those things..?" You asked with a feeble breath. "I really cared about you Loki.."

Loki removed his hand from your cheek with a guilty expression, and you found that you missed his warmth on your skin, despite the circumstances. "I.. I saw you with Thor." He blurted out, looking ashamed now. "I saw you enjoying his company and I.. I.." He seemed to struggle with his words, something you had never seen him do before. "I panicked!" He was breathing faster now. "I didn't want you to.. to.."

"Reject you...?" You offered gently, and moved to touch his hand to support him.

"Yes." He admitted with a heavy sigh, his head tilted down.

You couldn't help but cradle his face in your hands tenderly, holding it up so you could look into his eyes. "Loki, you need not be afraid of me. In the few days we were apart, my heart ached for you, I missed you terribly. Thor is a decent man, but you have a special place in my heart, one that cannot be filled by any other... You're my right hand man." You said with a sweet smile.

"Really?" Loki blinked, looking more innocent than you'd ever witnessed before.

"Absolutely." You assured, then gently removed your hands from him, and leaned against his shoulder. You looked up at the multitude of shinning stars and galaxies in the sky above.

It was quiet between you and Loki for a while. Just the sound of your soft breathing, and the swirling sounds of the winds and waves.

"Have you ever heard the story of the Archer?" Loki asked suddenly, his eyes still locked onto the stars.

You smiled softly, and looked at him, recognizing that this was his way of apologizing to you. He wanted to try to trust you, and you appreciated that. "No, I haven't." You said honestly.

"See that star?" He said, pointing up at the sky. "The one flashing beside the large one?"

You nodded. "Yes, I think so."

"If you connect it down three stars, then to the one diagonal of it twice, and do the same for the ones above, it makes a bow. The arrow is a ways away from it. Do you see it?"

You squinted your eyes, concentrating on the task Loki had given you. "Yes! There it is!"

Loki looked pleased. "There is a story that has been passed down for ages about it."

"I'd love to hear it, if you'll allow me the pleasure." You said, knowing he would need a little encouragement.

He took in a nervous breath then exhaled. "Alright.. Well, there was once a great archer, who was known throughout the land for being able to pin a needle to a target with his arrow. He was very proud of this."

As a gust of wind chilled your skin, causing you to shiver. "Perhaps we should go." Loki offered suddenly, sounding worried and nervous. "You're cold."

You shook your head. You did not want him to retreat so soon, so you cuddled up against him gently, letting your head rest against the point where his shoulder met his chest, while his arm remained wrapped around you from behind. "I will be fine if I am close to you. I wish to hear the story."

He smiled affectionately, then continued. "Alright. Let's see.. ah yes, but then, one day a new archer came, named Amicus. And he bested him in the yearly competition by splitting a needle in two with his arrow in mid-air."

"Poor archer." You voiced sadly, as Loki's vulnerable eyes looked into yours for a moment. He pulled you even closer to him subconsciously, as if someone might snatch you away at any moment during his somewhat exposed state.

"So, the archer left town, ashamed of himself, and wandered the streets alone. He was lonely and discouraged. He was known for this one thing, and now.. he was nothing. He wondered how he could ever be happy again." Loki turned his gaze back up to the dark sky. "That is, until he saw a young maiden out in the field, which was now only dead grass. She was drawing water from her well. The sun was hot, and her well was dry, the bucket came back up empty."

You kept your eyes on Loki, completely invested into the story.

"She grew weak and fainted on the ground. The archer saw her and carried her back to her village, and offered her his canteen when she had awoken. Her father then promised him her hand in marriage as a reward for saving her life."

"Did she love him?" You asked Loki inquisitively.

Loki put his other arm around your front and held you closer to him, his arms locked together as he kept you in the center of his embrace, resting close enough to you for you both to share in eachother's warmth. "Yes.. She loved him with all her heart, and he loved her."

"Were they together forever?" You asked softly near his ear. The intimacy between you two could have been clearly seen by anyone should they have happened to pass by. Your cheek was nuzzled into his neck sweetly and you began to realize that perhaps Loki wasn't just a friend in your heart...

"Forever." Loki assured. "They lived together and had many children. And one of those children grew up and had a child himself, who in turn grew up to be a great archer, and competed in a contest with the grandson of Amicus. He defeated him by splitting the eye of two needles in mid-air."

"How wonderful!"

Loki chuckled softly, which you felt through the rumble in his chest against your cheek. "They lived very happily with the archer's honor restored, and the love of his life in his arms... The end."

You sighed happily. "Thank you Loki." You said, and moved back a bit to look up at him.

"For what?" He asked with a gentle playfulness. He looked at the dark blue waves below now.

You chuckled silently, then moved forward a bit to kiss his cheek, only, he had decided to look at you at that moment, and for a brief instant, your lips met in a feather light kiss.

Blushing, you pulled away on instinct, with the telling sound of a sweet snap sealing the fleeting kiss with your retreat. You then quickly moved to indeed kiss his cheek, so he would realize your true first intentions. "S-Sorry." You said sheepishly, and gently wiped away a bit of light pink rouge that had imprinted on his cheek.

His pupils were dilated and his muscles were stiff around you, his breathing was a little heavy as well. "I-It's alright." He replied, as smoothly as he could.

You bit your bottom lip anxiously, worried as to what he was thinking.  What if he thought you had tried to make advances towards him and he didn't want them. Or worse, what if he didn't want to see you anymore in fear of another "incident" like this?

"I'd better take you back to your chambers before you turn bluer than a Jotun." Loki laughed, but you could tell he was uneasy by how his voice wavered.

He helped you stand up and kept an arm around your back as he escorted you across the bridge. All you could do is worry, wonder, and ponder what that accidental embrace had meant to him, and... what feelings it might have stirred within you.

****

All that night you tossed and turned in your bed. A thousand questions raced and zoomed through your mind. Then, sometimes you would think back to how the kiss felt.. It was so quick, one would think it would be meaningless, but to someone like you, who had felt so lonely, and so undesirable for so long... It nearly consumed you with emotions you thought you'd never have with such power or strength. Confusion, fear, excitement, passion. ...love.

"Am I in love with him...?" You asked yourself in a whisper amidst the dark shadows of your bedroom, with the moonlight spilling in through the window, painting highlights everywhere it could reach.

Up until now, you had seen him as a friend, and only that. Or had you only convinced yourself that was the case? Perhaps you were also afraid of rejection. You had decided long ago that you wouldn't pursue any sort of romantic interest. You were convinced that you didn't need anyone but the one person who had always been there for you, the one person who protected you, the one person you trusted. You.

But after tonight... After feeling the exhilarating spark within your chest when you felt him closer to you than you ever had before.. you couldn't help but wonder if that rule was still true for you. Certainly, he had the power to hurt you emotionally, to leave you, he showed it just a few days ago! And that scared you. Despite these new budding emotions, you decided that it would be best if you didn't give your heart away to him unless he proved himself to be trustworthy.

That didn't stop you from relaying the events of the evening over and over again in your mind however, and after a while, you finally did succumb to sleep.

Chapter Text

The following morning you awoke with a sleepy yawn, and stretched your arms up before rubbing the sleep from your eyes. It took you a few moments for you to finally wake up. Then you remembered the events of last night. You smiled despite your slight concern about the whole ordeal. Whether you had intended it or not, Loki had been your first kiss, and it was still a little exciting to you.

You happened to glance at your nightstand, when you saw a small slip of paper and a cup of tea. The note read,

Miss _____,

Prince Loki brewed this tea himself and asked that I bring it to you.

Signed,

Maiden Ambi (Palace Servant)

You smiled softly with gratefulness and relief in your heart as you gently held the steaming cup in your hands and took a sip. It was not too hot, and spread a warmth through your chest that was a comfort to you in the chill of the morning.

After you finished half of your tea, you thought it best to get ready for breakfast. As you got dressed, you realized how self-conscious you felt suddenly. You didn't used to care all that much how you looked around him and now you took forever to pick out a dress, and fix your hair. You groaned in frustration. "No. I am not going to let last night effect me. I do what I want." You decided, and purposefully redid your hair in a messy side braid. It still looked nice, just not quite as prim and proper, which made you feel a little more like yourself, and once you slipped on your flats, you pattered off towards the dinning hall.

You felt a knot in your stomach as you walked. You didn't know how Loki would react to seeing you again. The tea was a good sign, but still.. A million "what ifs" raced through your mind until you finally took in a breath to calm down. He probably isn't even thinking about it. He probably didn't even notice. You assured yourself.

When you entered the room, the royal family was already there, and Loki was the first, (and only) person to rise upon your entrance. "Good morning."

Your eyes met his for a moment and you felt your cheeks start to warm up so you averted your gaze. "Good morning Prince Loki, Prince Thor, my King, and Queen." You said respectfully, then sat beside Loki at the table.

He seemed a little uncomfortable and quiet this morning, and a queasy feeling in your stomach was the result of it.

Loki tapped his foot under the table, while his hands remained folded in his lap. Thor had taken to retelling a story about his bravery in a particular battle, as the food came out. Odin appeared to be very interested in this, while Frigga seemed to have divided her attention between listening to Thor, and being concerned over Loki.

After ten minutes of hearing Loki's boot thump against the floor, you finally spoke up, unable to take the suspense any longer. "Loki? What's wrong?"

"Nothing." He whispered back sharply, then took in a deep breath.

You were a little taken aback by his tone but shrugged it off for the most part, and made a mental note to ask him about it later.

"And that was when I destroyed the fowl beast with a blow from my mighty hammer!" Thor told the story enthusiastically, slamming his fist down on the table for emphasis.

Odin gave a merry laugh and smiled proudly at his son. "Of course you did!"

You had begun to tune out the story however and you quietly asked Loki if he had slept well last night. He replied with a purposefully softer tone this time, you noticed, as he told you that he slept fairly well.

"Do you remember any of your dreams?" You asked curiously as you took a piece of small fruit in your hand and ate it.

Loki hummed thoughtfully and was silent for a while. "Yes, I remember part of it, but, you ought to listen to Thor's retelling, lest Odin catch you being inattentive." Loki warned kindly.

You shook your head with a smile. "I'd much rather hear what stories occurred within your mind in the wee hours of the night." You said, your eyes nearly sparkling with intrigue.

His whole demeanor seemed to lighten up, and there was joy in his eyes as he quietly responded. "I dreamt that I was reading a sad book in the library, and I was suddenly overcome with loneliness, looking at how empty the room was. Then the doors opened and a woman walked over to me. Her skin glowed like a million shinning stars and I could feel her comfort penetrate my cold skin..."

You didn't for one instant take your eyes off of him, as he continued the last bit of his dream.

"When she came closer, her light no longer hid her. I thought her an angel at first but then I realize that it was..."

You were so captivated by him, how his eyes bore into yours, how his voice was as smooth as silk, filled with emotion yet, calm and easy. So lost were you, that Loki had to nudge you softly to bring you out of your daze and respond to the king, who had apparently asked you something.

"Well maiden?" He asked, a little short tempered.

"My apologies my king, what have you asked of me?"

In the corner of your eye, you saw Loki trying to withhold a sweet, genuine smile.

"I asked if you were impressed by my son Thor's accomplishments." Odin said shortly.

"Oh.. um.." You cleared your throat nervously. "I believe that you are blessed to have two very talented son's. Thor was gifted with great strength, which he uses to his best advantage against all creatures and men who might fight against him."

"Indeed." Odin said with a proud smile.

"And Loki," You paused for a moment to look at the man himself before addressing the king once more. "is gifted with great intelligence and cunning, he is able to outwit the largest beast or the wisest enemy if need be. He is also strong and agile, with a soft heart." You said the last bit with extreme fondness, and held his hand underneath the table, which he reciprocated with a gentle squeeze. He then leaned over to you and whispered against your ear,
"The angel in my dream was you."

You felt heat rise in your cheeks as Loki smiled at you as if you were some new treasure he had found. Meanwhile, the royal family looked surprised by both your choice of wording, and the amount of affection you had poured into Loki's description.

"I agree maiden, our son's are both very gifted." Frigga finally said, with a knowing smile. She seemed to be pleased with you, like you had passed a test of sorts.

You and Loki remained talking for a while at the table even after the servants had taken away the dishes and the royal family had left. Eventually he lead you over to the golden steps beside the table and you two sat down together.

"Loki?"

"Hmm?"

"What is it like being you?"

The question seemed to have taken him by surprise, yet their was a certain look in his eyes, a sensitive, emotional gaze, that said he had been waiting for someone to ask this for a long time...

Of course, he would never express how much the question meant to him so directly. Instead he answered calmly, as if you had asked him his favorite color. "It isn't always mischief and smirks. I will admit that I am much more patient and..." He searched for the right word. "Thoughtful, when I am with you. Throughout Asgard however, I am known, most likely, for being, reserved yet hot tempered when aggravated." He finished.

You shook your head and moved closer to him. "No..." You said gently, and cupped his cheek in your hand for him to look at you. You knew how much was within him, so much hurt, so much he wanted to say. You wanted him to be able to trust you. "I want to know what's in here.." You slid your hand down to his chest, where the leather of his armor had muffled the feeling of his heartbeat against your skin.

He took in a shaky breath then looked down sadly.

"You do not have to tell me Loki." You assured tenderly, and he looked up at you then. "However, I will be here if ever you find it safe to trust me. Which, I assure you, you can." He smiled ever so gently, just his lips curling together. "No matter how long it takes, I'll wait."

"Thank you." Loki said, so quietly, that you might have missed it, had you not been so attentive.

You removed your hand from him and set it back at your side as he sighed. "_____... About what happened before-" He began, and you started to worry. Was he talking about the kiss?

"I am um.. well, I regret that I had hurt you when I effectively pushed you away from me. Honestly, I didn't think you would be hurt at all by my absence." He admitted softly.

Internally you were very relieved that he was not talking about the accident on the rainbow bridge, and you found it easier to pay attention therefore.

"No one else has ever really minded if they did not have my company, except my mother. And I thought that you had surely been taken in by Thor and wanted little to do with me anymore. And I was angry because that day when I had been away from your side, I had been helping mother plan the ball that is to be held in your honor next week. I intend on keeping my word, and you will become a Lady soon enough." He said, and rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

"Oh Loki..." You said with sympathy. "I understand, but if you ever feel that I have hurt you in some way, just come talk to me. Do anything but push me away... Just as you fear rejection, so do I also. It would break my heart to lose you."

"You.. are not speaking lies, are you?" Loki asked timidly, as vulnerable as he was with you on the rainbow bridge.

You gently cradled his face in your hands as his body shifted to face you. "You of all men would know if I were lying. Look at me, do you see what I feel for you?"

"I see... compassion, worry, sadness, and..." He paused for a moment, as if he were confused. "love."

As soon as the words left his lips you knew that it was true, a warmth spread through you and you felt the budding of joyful tears come to your eyes.

"Do you...?" Loki asked, but before you could answer, the fragile moment was shattered by the thud of large boots, belonging to none other than the Thunderer himself.

At this noise, Loki moved away from your embrace, all softness gone from his expression, his true self was locked away behind a barrier to protect himself.

"Still in here brother?" Thor laughed happily, not noticing how your eyes glared daggers at him.

"Yes, _____ and I were having a pleasant discussion." Loki said somewhat bitterly.

"Oh.. well, I do not want to intrude."

"Then you'd better invent a time machine." Loki muttered under his breath, then said louder, "What is it?"

"Father wishes to declare which one of us will be leading the battle against Jotunhiem." Thor explained.

"I have a feeling there is more."

"Indeed. The leader shall also be the successor to father, the official heir to the throne."

Chapter Text

It had been at least ten minutes since Loki had been in his chambers pacing around, and still he would not let you in. "Loki, I understand if you want to be alone, but please don't-"

You heard something crash from the other side of the door. You sighed softly. "Please, my Prince I-"

"Don't call me Prince!"

You sighed again. "Loki, can't you at least tell me what's wrong. I'm on your side remember?"

It was silent for a while, which you took as a good sign, until you heard a thud against the back wall.

Ten more minutes passed and you sat down against the door, waiting for him. You were willing to give him space, but you had a feeling that he should talk it out, he kept too many emotions bottled up inside.

A servant walked passed you at one point, and looked at you strangely. You simply smiled and nodded up to acknowledge them, as if you sitting against the Prince's door while he threw a fit was as natural as breathing itself.

While you heard cursing and slamming on the other side, you were deep in thought, wondering the deeper reason behind Loki's anger, after all, Odin hadn't actually chosen his successor yet. But you knew, all of Asgard knew who it would be. Loki was one whom no one wanted nor trusted to be king, least of all his father, or so was the rumor. "You know that I value you don't you?"

The clamoring and yelling ceased at your voice, so you continued. "When I was a little girl, I loved my father dearly, for he was the only one whom I could confide in, the only one who loved me despite my slight tendency to be more fragile than the other girls my age. When he died I felt as though the very building blocks of Asgard had crumbled from under my feet. The children at the orphanage were merciless. They teased me, beat me, ostracized me, just for being "weaker". When I met you..." You took in a deep breath as you remembered. "I felt connected to you. I wanted to be near you, because I knew you understood. I also had a hunch that you were sweet, despite all the rumors."

You heard him sigh heavily on the other side, closer to you now. He must have been sitting against the door too. "You know why you are so angry don't you?"

He was silent on the other side.

"Because you care Loki. Because you love your family despite everything that happened, and still you do not get the same amount of care that a father ought to give to both his sons."

You heard him sigh again. "No matter what happens," You continued. "whether you are king or not, I will think you are more than worthy of it."

Still, he didn't speak, so you exhaled softly and stood up. "Well... That's all I wanted to say. I'll leave you be now." You said, then began to walk away, only to hear the timid sound of a door creaking open. You turned around to see Loki standing there meekly. "Please, don't go..."

You walked over to him with a loving smile. "Then I shall gladly stay."

Loki nodded, then stepped out of his room and closed the door behind him, much to your curiosity. "Come, there is something you must see."

Curiously, you followed Loki through the palace halls as he walked with a determined look.

"Loki?" You asked, after some time had passed.

"Yes?"

"You do.. like my company. Don't you?" You asked nervously. So many times you had assured him and reassured him that you cared for him, that you admired him, yet, he had hardly said much to you.

"Yes, of course I do." He said simply, as if his answer should have been obvious.

You took a hold of his arm to bring him to a halt before you two could walk up a narrow spiral staircase. "I don't understand."

"I mean what I say darling." He said, and started to move again but you stopped him again.

Your mind had barely the time to process the term of endearment as you were focused on the current question in your thoughts. "It would appear to me, that you, a man who boasts on his ability to lie is very suspicious of me lying to him. Yet he himself has not clearly articulated why he fancies to spend his time with a peasant."

"Hmm.. Put it like that, perhaps I won't." He joked and started to move, but again, you stopped him, your hurt expression causing him to pause. He looked unsure as to what to do next, until finally he said with an adoring smile, "There is a reason why you are the angel in my dreams..."

He began moving up the staircase again and all you could do was follow him, and assess the new information he had given you.

There were torches along the wall that gave light to the otherwise dark, tunnel-like staircase, and it seemed to nearly go on forever, until suddenly, colors danced all around the walls in all different shapes and sizes, and for an instant, you thought you might be in a kaleidoscope.

"Well, here it is." Loki said as he reached the top of the stairs just a few seconds before you.

The stairs lead to a medium sized room, with a curved floor and a dome for a roof, with millions of pieces of shattered reflective material, colored in a million different hues, creating a brilliant display of shimmering color throughout it.

You stood in the center of the room in awe, and took in every bit of detail that was in each glass. There appeared to be little love notes engraved in each tiny, shattered piece, only a few having been still left untouched.

Loki's p.o.v

"It's amazing how something so broken can be made into such beauty." _____ said, as she looked around the area with the cutest smile and brilliant eyes.

"Indeed.." I said quietly, as my thoughts began to drift back to the moment when we were on the rainbow bridge together. I remember thinking that her spirit was nearly radiant, and her tender heart was still so willing to love and trust if only someone gave her reason to. I felt so guilty, I still feel guilty for hurting her. How could I have ever thought to push away such a woman?

"Who was that lady with you before?" Her voice shattered my thoughts and all my attention was back on her. I knew of course which woman she spoke of, though I still found it hard to grasp why she would be jealous.

"An illusion." I answered shamefully.

"You mean.. she wasn't real?"

I shook my head with a pathetic laugh. "Lightning does not strike in the same place twice..."

She looked at me curiously. "How do you mean?"

"Did you not notice something familiar in her features?" I mentioned as I used the room as an excuse to move away from her a bit, to try and hide my embarrassment. She didn't respond to my statement.

Looking at the colors in the room, the rainbow bridge came to mind once more. I had tried so desperately to forget that... accidental embrace. I tried to forget how it shot a pleasant spark through my chest. I tried in vein to forget the way her soft lips felt against mine, if only for an instant. I did not want to remember because I knew it was absolutely hopeless for me to let myself believe that I would ever be so blessed as to have her love me so fully.

I sighed. She deserved someone so much more whole than I felt. She deserved someone who was not broken.

Suddenly I felt a pair of arms wrap around me from behind and hold me close. I could feel her cheek pressed up against my back, and I wondered how she knew I was in such misery. No one had ever noticed before..

"You need not pity me." I said in a murmur.

"I don't." Was her simple yet kind response, and she continued to hold me tightly, as if she were afraid I might collapse if she didn't keep me in her embrace.

It was then that I realized that I was in love with her.

Chapter Text

Three weeks later, the day of the inauguration had finally arrived. Loki had planned it so that you would be given your title at the same time Thor would. You protested against the idea at first, but Loki insisted that it was the only way the ceremony would be bearable for him, because that way he could at least be happy for you. Thus, here you were, in your chambers, getting dressed up for the grand occasion.

It was a bit nerve wrecking knowing that so many people would be there... But it comforted you to know that you would be helping Loki in some way.

Your dress had buttons all down the back of it, covered in pretty satin. It was very elegant, but impractical in this situation, since you were attempting to dress yourself.

There was a knock at the door. "Who is it?"

"The rejected son of white beard."

You shook your head with a roll of your eyes and held your dress up with one hand then opened the door with the other. "Don't say that Loki, you're wonderful." You assured, and kissed his cheek, which caused him to smile. "You are the only one with that opinion my Lady."

You held his hand with your free one and lead him inside as he closed the door behind him. "Come, you need to help me with my dress."

Loki smirked, a sparkle of mischief in his eyes. "On or off?"

You playfully smacked his arm. "On."

"Such a tease." Loki chided with a few clicks of his tongue and went to work, deftly buttoning up the dress.

"You've been so.. friendly lately.. why is that?" You asked.

"Perhaps because you tempt me by exposing your back in your chambers." He said with a husky voice, then wrapped his arms around you from behind in a sweet embrace, now that he was finished with his work.

You gently placed your hands on his. "It wasn't intentional." You said with a smile.

He turned you around, a softer look in his eyes as he held your hands. "_____, I-"

The door burst open, revealing a very concerned Queen Frigga. "Oh! Sorry dear, but we've been searching  all over the palace for this Lady to be. She and Thor are to make their entrance soon. In fact, you are supposed to be out there now Loki."

Loki smiled apologetically to you. "We will continue our talk later I suppose."

"Of course, Loki." You smiled and barely had time to think before the poor anxious Queen took your hand and hurried you off towards the throne room.

You waited behind the large doors that lead to the throne room alone for a while before Thor showed up and stood with you.

You twisted your hands together nervously. But this time you weren't nervous for yourself, you were concerned for Loki. He must feel so awful right now.. given what this ceremony meant on a deeper level. He wasn't good enough for his father. Not even close.

"You aren't nervous, are you maiden?" Thor smirked as he looked at you.

"Nervous? Me? I know not the word."  You said rather unconvincingly.

Thor laughed and put a large arm around your shoulder and pulled you into an awkward side hug, in which your head was squished between his bicep and his side. "Thor? Um... You're kind of.."

"Oh! My apologizes maiden. I forget my strength at times." He chuckled as he released you.

"So Loki says." You nodded with an amused smile.

It was silent for a while. "Maiden?"

"Yes Prince Thor?"

"Are you.." He seemed confused, as if he were trying to formulate a sentence to his liking. "You and Loki are.. friends, yes?"

"We haven't exactly kept it a secret.." You said with a soft chuckle.

Thor nodded. "And you two are just friends...?"

You nodded, unsure what else to say or do, just as the doors opened.

. . . .

Once arrived at your spot in front of the throne, your eyes were on Loki. He clearly saw the concern in your expression and his sad yet kind smile was evidence of this.

"Thor Odinson." Odin's voice echoed throughout the hall. "My heir... my first born.."

You could see the glistening water in Loki's eyes, a product of his pain, which he was too proud to show. He swallowed hard to keep his feelings at bay. You wanted to run over and wrap your arms around him, but you knew it would only embarrass him if you did so.

Odin kept speaking, and you had barely noticed when he began talking about you, since your thoughts were so focused on your best friend. "______ Lidellsdottir. A woman of strength, and heart, and the savior of my second born, on a most tragic day.. I now dub thee, Lady _____."

. . . . .

The celebration that followed was very busy, with people, food, and mead everywhere! You had trouble finding Loki amongst the crowd. "Loki?" You called. You tried to keep from knocking into people as you searched. "Oh Loki?" You said a bit louder. You heard his voice coming from somewhere in the middle of the commotion.

"Now leave me alone, I am trying to find Lady-"

You spotted each other at the same time, eyes locked, you smiled shyly before you hurried over to him. You tilted your head up to look at his elegant yet masculine features. "Hello again."

"Hello my beautiful Lady." Loki said charismatically, as he kissed your hand.

You turned from him sheepishly. "Oh Loki you flatter me."

"Mmm, I'm just getting started. Ehehe." He laughed deeply as he looked down at you with a smirk.

You managed to cast your gaze back upon him. "You look devastatingly handsome this night."

"Don't I always?" He quipped as he looped his arm around yours.

"Yes, but I don't comment on it ordinarily, lest you become even more arrogant." You laughed as he lead you to the dance floor.

"You confuse me with another my Lady, I am as meek as a Midgardian mouse."

"You're a chronic liar." You teased.

He pointed his nose up defiantly. "Nonsense. I can stop any time I want."

"Another lie." You smirked and kissed his chin lovingly. "Are you going to dance with me or converse all evening?"

"Converse." Loki said lightly, just as he took you into his arms and began dancing with you all across the glossy floor.

You kept a respectable distance at first, but soon drew closer to him, until your arms were wrapped around his neck. Of course, Thor found it fitting to interrupt at this time. "May I.. um.. cut in?" He asked, his words a little slurred.

Loki raised his eyebrows and eyed his brother with suspicion. "Very well..." He said reluctantly, and let go of your waist, while you kept your arms around his neck.

He chuckled deeply and you felt his chest rumble as you refused to let go of him. "Lovely, 'tis only a dance, I shall be here when it is through." He murmured into your ear.

You sighed softly and finally released him from your grasp. Thor took your hand and lead you away from Loki.

. . . . .

It did not take long for you to break up the awkward encounter you had with the blonde prince. You were sure Thor was a little buzzed from the mead, since he was brazen enough to put his hand so low on your back. He usually was much more polite than that.

"Loki?" You said when you were by his side once again. "Can we go somewhere more private? It's getting a little crowded in here.."

"But my Lady, you are the guest of honor." Loki said with concern, while you wrapped an arm around his waist from behind and leaned up against him. "I just want to be with you.."

Loki smiled affectionately then nodded. "Perhaps you might like an evening walk through the forest?" He suggested.

You shook you head. "Perhaps tomorrow, I still want to dance with you." You said warmly.

Loki nodded and glanced out the window. "I know just the place.."

. . . . .

The kind prince lead you to the middle of the rainbow bridge, underneath the dazzling night sky, and above the majestic waters, where he then offered you his hand with a charming smile. "May I have this dance?"

Your eyes lit up and you smiled from ear to ear before skipping his hand altogether and throwing your arms around his neck and holding him close. You felt his gentle chuckle through the movement of his chest, just as he began to dance with you, swaying back and forth, barely moving his feet, as if you two were merely using this dance as an excuse to hold each other close.

You nuzzled into his neck sweetly and closed your eyes. You felt him hold you tighter to him and his baritone voice broke the silence gently. "Darling..? Might I see your beautiful face?"

You complied, and listened to him speak with bright eyes. "I thought of so many ways to tell you this.. Each one sappier than the last.." He chuckled nervously. "So I've decided to speak from my heart, no matter how it sounds.." He took in a deep breath and exhaled quietly. "You are... better than the grandest novel. Your beauty causes roses to envy, and your heart gives me hope. You are a light in my life that is brighter than the sun, and I love thee, darling woman. I love thee."

Silently you gasped, then blinked a few times, as you took in his words, before you gently cupped his cheek and pressed a soft, slow kiss onto his lips. "I love you more than anything." You murmured against his mouth before he ignited another kiss between you two, only this time it was deeper and more passionate, fueled with the fire of longing. The rest of the world, the rest of your past wounds seemed to fade away within the time you both expressed your complete and total love for each other. He pulled away slightly to catch a fleeting breath before he captured your lips again. You felt his hands on your back, to keep you flush against him while your fingers were tangled in his silky black hair. Your heart raced with excitement and your chest was warm with love. He broke the kiss once again and closed his eyes as he pressed his forehead against yours, both of you panting, chests heaving, as you felt his cool breath against your skin. You ran the tip of your tongue against your bottom lip as you thought of how he tasted, sweet yet minty. You loved him, oh yes, you loved him..

"I trust you with my heart.." Loki murmured quietly, still so close to you.

"And I trust you with mine.."

Chapter Text

A few months had passed since you two had confessed your love for each other. In that time, the drums of war grew louder. The Frost Giants had repeatedly violated their truce with Asgard. Their men burned villages and kidnapped anyone they deemed valuable. One can only imagine the horrors they put their victims through. As you were Loki's love, he saw fit to train you to defend yourself. He wanted to be there to protect you every moment, but he was wise enough to know that wasn't feasible, and he felt better knowing that you could take care of yourself if he wasn't there.

Currently, he was teaching you how to use a bow. He had his arms wrapped around your waist, kissing your neck with a smile as he did so.

You giggled softly. "Loki.. how am I supposed to concentrate with you kissing me like that."

You felt him laugh quietly against you. "Mmm.. then don't."

You rolled your eyes with a smile. "I'll tell you what, after the lesson I'll make us some lunch and we'll go on a picnic."

"Who needs food? I'll just feast on you." He mumbled, then peppered kisses all along the side of your neck and face.

You chuckled silently. "I haven't even shot an arrow yet."

Loki sighed overdramatically. "Very well." He said, and took a step back to help you with your stance, moving your elbow so it was parallel to your jaw. "Now, pull the arrow back until your hand reaches the end of your beautiful eyes."

You smiled. "You spoil me with your flattery Loki."

The prince smirked. "Ehehe. Alright now.. release."

You let go of the string. A delicate woosh sliced through the air and hit dead center of the target.

"I'm impressed." Loki said with a certain look on his eyes, more intense. "Now do it again."

You took a deep breath as you drew the second arrow back. "I'll aim for just above the last one." You said, careful to remember the tips Loki had taught you before you released. The arrow hit the hay bale exactly where you'd wanted.

Loki grinned proudly. "That's my girl."

. . . . .

"I think you've found your weapon of choice my dear." Loki said, as you two headed up the hill with a picnic basket full of food.

"You really think so?" You smiled.

"I believe so, love." Loki said as you two reached the top.

You smiled fully, your eyes closed in happiness, so pleased to have impressed him. You felt a pair of soft lips on your cheek and you giggled. "What was that for?"

"You're adorable."

You smiled shyly as you laid the blanket out on the grass then sat down on it with Loki. "I've been getting much better at combat wouldn't you say?" You said as you offered him a sandwich.

"Yes you have, I dare say you could overtake my brother if you wanted to." He said with a smirk as he took the food and ate a bite.

"Well.. I don't know about that." You said humbly. "Maybe Fandral." You laughed.

Loki nodded with a slight smile, clearly enjoying both his time with you, and the sandwich you made. "This is delicious!" He said once he had swallowed.

"I'm glad you're enjoying it." You smiled and took a bite of your own, then spoke again once you had swallowed. "I'm thinking of going back to my village soon, I left a few books in my old home and I wanted to bring them back to the palace."

Loki nodded, but looked concerned. You gently touched his hand. "You've trained me every day for the past three months, I'll be alright." You assured.

"I know I just.. worry." He said quietly and pulled you into his lap so your back was up against his chest. "Perhaps I should go with you.."

"Loki, you trained me so you wouldn't worry." You said sympathetically as you touched his hands, which rested on your stomach. "And so I would be safe, and we've done a good job, don't you think?"

He sighed softly. "Yes, but I did not plan on willingly letting you go out by yourself.."

"I'll bring that sword you had made for me." You said, as you rested against him.

"Well.. alright." His hands were trembling now, and he nuzzled into your neck affectionately.

"Please don't be afraid for me my Loki, I won't stay there long."

"I will await your safe and healthy return..."

* * * * *

You rode Hammy up to your old house, and entered it without trouble, you grabbed your books and locked the door behind you. As you casually looked around, you noticed a little girl sitting on a bench in front of a store. She was crying silently as she held her little homemade doll.

You felt concerned for the poor girl, probably only six years old. You guided Hammy over to her and smiled softly. "Hello there little one." You said kindly as she wiped away her tears. "This is Hamlet, my horse, but I call him Hammy. Would you like to feed him?" You asked, and she nodded. You placed a sugar cube in her hand. "Just show it to him with your palm out."

She did as you instructed, and giggled a bit when Hammy kindly ate the offering from her hand. "Would you like to tell me what's wrong?" You asked, kneeling down so you were closer to her level.

"My papa is going away..." She whimpered. "To fight Jotuns."

You looked a little confused, and saw a man walk out of the store. He was an older man, and seemed a little more frail compared to the other Asgardians his age. He saw the worry in your eyes and sighed softly. "Do not worry for me, kind princess, I will gladly fight for Asgard."

"Why does papa have to fight if he's sick?" The little girl asked you, before you could explain to her father his wrong assumption of you.

"Hush my child." He spoke gently. "It is the right thing for me to do."

"Sir, what is your name?" You asked politely.

"I am Kayson. This is my daughter, Lumi."

You smiled softly at the girl, who waved shyly in response. You turned your attention to her father. "I will speak with Prince Loki and see what can be done."

He shook his head urgently. "No, no, please do not. I must train with the other men next month."

"Please allow me to try sir. Go to the lessons as you must, but let me speak with my Loki about it. I am Lidell's daughter, and I lost my father to war when I was young and he was healthy, I would not wish for your daughter to have the same fate." You said with compassion, as the girl looked at you with hopeful eyes, while her father looked thoughtful.

"I will allow it, only if it will help your conscious. It is Odin's law to have one man from every family participate in the draft, and I doubt he will make any changes for our family."

"A chance is all we need." You said determinedly, then saddled Hammy once again, and headed back to the palace.

. . . . .

As the stable boys tended to Hammy, you headed for the inside of the palace through the garden. You heard a clamoring once inside, then yelling.

"What do you mean you didn't see her?!" Loki growled just down the hall, as he stared down a young messenger boy. "I gave you one simple task and you failed! You incompetent-"

You stopped him by placing a gentle hand on his lower back. "Darling...?"

He took in a shaky breath and wrapped his arms around you tightly while you frantically waved the boy away from behind, for his own safety.

"I was so worried for you, I thought..."

You gently pet his hair to soothe him, as he placed a few kisses on your cheeks. "Loki, all is well, I assure you. I didn't even have to use my sword."

"Still, your absence was nerve wrecking. I paced the floor until your return."

"And sent a scout out to spy on me.." You said, pulling away just a bit to look into his eyes, which were red, and no doubt stinging from the tears he refused to let fall.

"I am sorry my love, I know it is shameful of me.. But if anything happened to you, if those Jotun bastards harmed you the way only monsters do... I'd.. I'd.." He looked numb now, a far off look in his eyes.

You gently placed your hands on his cheeks so that he'd look at you. "I'm here Loki.. I'm still here."

"For how long..?" He asked, as he pressed his forehead down against yours tenderly.

"Forever." You said with a slight smile, and his lips pressed together in a soft, sad smile.

You both knew it could not be true. The war could officially begin at any time. And you would be away from him, and he would be apart from you..

*~Later that evening~*

It was a beautiful summer night in Asgard, warm and soothing, yet a cool breeze kept the heat from becoming uncomfortable. You sat beside Loki at the dinner table, with the food on your plate only half eaten. Odin had finally quit commenting on your distinct and consistent lack of a large appetite.

Loki would defend you always, saying that he appreciated it as an addition to your feminine grace. The thought made you smile.

"What are you thinking of?" Loki asked you quietly with a smile.

You laughed. "As if you don't know."

"I may be very talented, exceedingly handsome, and intelligent beyond belief, but alas, I cannot read minds." He said with a soft smirk.

You gave his cheek a light kiss. "And so humble too."

Nearly anyone who knew Loki thought he was arrogant, but you knew different. Sure you two would joke of it but that was the extent of it. Loki held wounds that you hoped to some how soothe. Others might have wanted to change Loki, but to want to change someone is just another guise for rejection.. You loved Loki, and accepted him as is, no alterations. But it was that love that made you want to help him heal..

You wanted to help so many people, but there just wasn't time for them all. There was however, time for Kayson and his daughter.

"King Odin?" You called, once there was a lull in the conversation.

"Yes?" He replied.

"I met a man out by my home and-"

Thor laughed. "Perhaps she's leaving Loki for another!"

You glared daggers at the prince, who was too drunk with mead to speak intelligently. "You really oughtn't drink so much "liquid courage" Thor, or I may be forced to teach you a lesson by instilling fear in you once again."

Frigga chuckled quietly to herself while Odin cleared his throat for you to continue. "Well, my king, this man is very ill and is presumably his daughter's sole provider. As I am an orphan myself, I ask that you consider granting him a pardon, so that he may care for her."

Odin sighed heavily. "I cannot make an exception for one and not for others. If I allow him pardon then all who claim to be ill will also be pardoned and although I hope that Asgardian men are honorable, not all of them are and many will lie to evade the draft."

"So you condemn the ill to death?"

"They would have succumbed to it as time passed, what does it matter if they die now or in another cycle?"

"It matters to a child!" You shouted, losing your temper as your own personal struggles brought up strong emotions. "I would have given anything to have just one more memory to hold on to when I was put in an orphanage, alone! Every moment means something!"

"Darling-" Loki tried.

"Lady-" Frigga spoke.

You ignored them. "How could you let them suffer?!"

Odin leaned forward in his seat, staring at you intensely. "That. Is. War."

You clenched your teeth together, eyes blazing as he continued.

"The innocent die. It is simply another fact we must accept."

"You might, but I never will." You stated determinedly, then stood up from your chair and left the room, in need of some fresh air and a clear train of thought. How could the king possibly expect you to embrace the thought of innocent people dying when it can be prevented! And.. why had Loki tried to keep you from speaking up, rather than defend you as he had done previously?

Chapter Text

Loki followed you to the garden, where he saw you standing with your arms wrapped around yourself, looking up at the shinning moon.

"_____?" He called gently as he walked towards you.

"I know I shouldn't have gotten so angry, but.. it means a lot to me, and you should have stood by me. Why.. why didn't you?" You asked, looking into his eyes softly, disappointed.
His expression twitched at the sight, as if in pain.

"I have no excuse for what happened tonight, only an explanation.. I was taught that it is an honor to fight for Asgard. To abandon your duty for any reason is an act of treason and least of all, you are considered a coward. And as a leader in the upcoming war, I could not support you in trying to pardon this man.. Especially in front of my father." He said, then held his hands together a bit nervously.

You sighed quietly. "I did not mean to embarrass you, Loki, I apologize if I did. But I am not going to back down when I see something wrong. I don't care if I'm up against a king or a simple street sweeper, I must defend people who can't defend themselves." You said, standing your ground.

"But why? Why must you do these things? Last week I had to stop you from trying to convince the servants to demand pay!"

"But they do deserve pay!"

"They get room and board-" Loki sighed and rubbed his temples with his fingers. "Let's not have this discussion for a second time, please?"

You sighed heavily. "I can't -won't- change who I am Loki, I like to help people!"

"But again, why?! They don't matter! They are the same type of people who left you in the dust! The same people who couldn't care less about you! You matter, not them!" Loki said, growing a bit frantic. You constantly loved others more than yourself, and he admired that, only.. it got you into trouble at times, and that scared him.

"I do it because I don't want to be like them!" You exclaimed, then took a moment to catch your breath. "And anyway, Kayson and Lumi are not like those other people. They're innocent." You paused, looking straight into his eyes. "And that little girl's fate as it stands, is to be without her father, alone, afraid, and forgotten. And I refuse to stand aside and watch that happen."

Loki saw the tears in your eyes and his heart broke. He wrapped you up in his arms and held you close in a warm embrace, your front flush against him. "You're right. You're absolutely right. My sweet angel, always caring for others.. always caring for me.." He placed a kiss on your hair and nuzzled down into your neck. "I simply worry for you, I worry that one day you will end up getting hurt... But just because my heart is not as soft does not mean that I should stand in the way of you being the beautiful, wonderful woman that I am madly in love with."

You smiled sweetly and turned around to wrap your arms around his neck. "You have quite a talent of making me forgive you."

You felt his chuckle rumble from his chest, tickling your body. "They don't call me "Silver Tounge" for nothing."

"So are you fooling me, Silver Tongue?" You teased, going on your tip toes a bit so you could be closer to his mouth.

"I would never lie to you my love." He murmured and kissed you tenderly, bringing up his hand from your waist to your cheek and deepening the kiss to make it more intimate.

He left you breathless, as usual. "I knew Silver Tongue was a double meaning." You said with an amused smirk.

"Only for you my lover." He murmured into your ear, his voice sultry and smooth, and his breath cool on your skin. You felt him press a kiss on the shell of your ear then his hand left your cheek and gingerly held your hand. You noticed that his palms were a bit sweaty and his eyes were nervous, as if he wasn't telling you something.. "Come darling, I know a place where we can relax."

. . . .

Loki took you to a small village on a hilltop where the city glowed orange from the lanterns lit with fire. The city was still active this night, with a few shops open. You and he strolled along the dirt road, hand in hand, hearing a few people whisper, wondering what the Prince was doing in their little village, with a women half of Asgard assumed was either a princess or going to be. Loki was a little more subdued in manner than you were used to, but you thought perhaps it was simply because you two were outside of the safety of the palace, and he was on edge.

"Oh look Loki!" You yipped happily and lead him over to a bakery and breathed in the yummy air of freshly baked bread. "May we buy some?" You asked with eager, child-like eyes as you two entered the shop.

He laughed happily. "Ehehe. Of course!"

"Hello good sir!" You said happily to the man behind the counter, then you nodded to the lady, most likely his wife. The woman was on the heavier side and she had a beautifully kind face, with eyes that showed of pure love and happiness that was in every piece of bread she made no doubt.

"Hello Princess." The woman said happily, while her husband looked out the front window curiously from behind the counter.

"Oh no, I'm not a princess." You assured. "I am courting a Prince however." You grinned and turned to look at him, only, he was gone. He had quiet feet, but it was strange to have him leave now. Your heart started to beat faster, what if something happened to him!

"Do not worry milady, Prince Loki is just across the street at the-oof-" His wife's elbow had apparently impaired his speech via his round tummy. "Ahem. I mean, he's out browsing."

You looked confused but decided to let Loki have his little secret, since he liked to surprise you on occasion. "Well then," You chuckled. "I would like to purchase two French baguettes , -they are always in my Midgardian novels- this sweet bread here, and oh! You've got this lovely banana bread how did you manage that? And this one.. and that one..."

The husband beamed at you, as he spoke to his wife. "I like this one! Good customer."

"Very enthusiastic!" His wife agreed as she attempted to keep up with your requests.

"Annnd... That one." You pointed with a smile, simply beaming at the basket of steaming bread on the counter. You turned to look for Loki and gasped. "There you are! Sly fox, always slipping about." You chuckled.

"With good reason, I assure you." Loki smiled, then looked at your large order and raised his eyebrows with a cute smile. "Most women beg for a million dresses, you my darling are so much more interesting." Loki complimented, then handed the bakers' their money.

You smiled up at him as you took your basket of goodies. "You have to help me eat it all. I'm a taster not a muncher." You laughed.

"You might need to ask Voltstagg and Thor for help." Loki jested, and looped his arm around your free one, as you said good bye to the nice couple. "I hope to see you again."

"And you as well!" The wife said as you and Loki walked out of the store.

"Loki! Let's eat some of the bread now, what do you say?" You asked as you set your eyes on a tree just outside the city. "We can eat under that tree!"

Loki smiled affectionately and held your hand as you lead him to the tree, where he sat down against the tree trunk. He patted his lap, inviting you to sit down with him. You sat on his lap sideways and set the basket down on the ground beside you before tearing off a piece of hot bread and feeding it to him. Loki sweetly returned the favor and fed you.

You both knew that you were different, that you both had a bit of a temper in certain situations, and you had argued on a few occasions, but you felt safe and at home when you were together. You were a team; you protected and loved one another like neither of you had felt in quite some time...

Loki noticed you looking up at the stars, so he used the moment to his advantage. You glanced back down at Loki and saw that he had a boyish smile on his face, wanting to please you. In his hand was a beautiful diamond and gold necklace, that almost looked like a gorgeous chandler. It sparkled in the orange light, and caused a warm feeling of affection to wash over you.

"Oh Loki.. This is so beautiful! Like the stars themselves!" You marveled, as your fingers delicately graced the dangling stones. "But I can't accept this sweetheart, it's too expensive."

He shook his head adamantly. "Please dear, I bought it just to see your eyes sparkle, you must not take that away from me." He said with a shy smile as he moved your hair to the front and placed the necklace around your neck.

"I don't want you to feel obligated to buy me things though.. The bread would have been enough." You said gently.

"You are the greatest treasure. Currency means nothing compared to seeing you smile."

"Bread makes me smile.." You chuckled, then gave him a soft kiss.

"But you are divine.." Loki murmured into your ear, his black hair a bit disheveled from the day. You loved it when he looked like this, because with others he was sharp, hair perfectly in place, a mask over his expressions, his heart locked up. But now, here, with you, he was really himself.

"You're a hopeless romantic my love... my Loki.." You mumbled, placing kisses on his neck and shoulders where you knew he liked, causing his head to lull back a bit, as you peppered his top half with kisses.

"I am so in love with you ______... I must protect you my lovely, my treasure.."

You knew what he was thinking of. The war. He was going to leave you who knows when. And what if he never came back? What if-

"Please don't fear for me _____." Loki said, as if reading your mind.  

Such a clever man is he..

You sighed, and leaned against his chest softly. "How can I not? It is as if we are all alone on an empty rock of a planet together and now you're.. you're saying good bye." Your voice wavered, as tears filled your eyes.

He held you tighter against him "I'm not leaving yet dear, please don't fret."

"I fear I'll lose you! I couldn't bare it, I-I can't even think of it."

"And you mustn't think of it, for it will not happen. I have become quite skilled at escaping death you know." He winked, then held you closer to him.

You couldn't speak, only nod sadly against his chest and tilt up to kiss his chin.

His nimble fingers carefully ran through your hair affectionately. "Besides... we have a more pressing problem."

"What do you mean?"

Loki swallowed hard and seemed to tighten his grip on you. "You spoke against Odin, and after you left he spoke of trying you for treason."

You suddenly looked frightened and hugged him even tighter to you, not a gap of space between your body and his. "W-What will happen to me?"

"Nothing. I will fix this." Loki assured, eyes determined.

"Loki... what might happen to me?"

He sighed softly and kissed the top of your forehead. "If you are found guilty, you will be sent to the dungeons of Asgard for a thousand years..."

You took in a shaky breath and whimpered softly into his chest. "What have I done Loki, I-"

"Don't worry, I will talk to my mother before the trial. Odin will listen to her."

You nodded into his chest and sighed. "I hope so.."

Chapter Text

Loki was forbidden from attending the trial the following day, but that morning, he did tell you that he had spoken to Queen Frigga on your behalf, so you did have a bit of hope.

"_____ Lidellsdottir, your statements have been treasonous in nature, how do you plead?"

You swallowed hard, looking from the Queen to the King. "N-Not guilty?"

"Do not fret child, he will not send you to the dungeons." Frigga spoke kindly. "Especially not the daughter of his best friend, now deceased."

Odin nodded. "I have an alternate punishment for your talk of treason. One that will protect you, and Asgard."

You blinked a few times, still worried.

"You will leave the palace and live in your home once again, and you will be forbidden from visiting with Loki." Odin said, causing Frigga to look sharply at him in shock. "Failure to do so will cost you your life."

You shook your head fervently. "For how long?"

"For the rest of your days."

"How will this help me or Asgard? I don't understand."

"Your father would not approve of you being with him, and you attempt to teach him your treasonous ways."

You frantically tried to think of an alternate punishment while Frigga defended you. "Husband, you mustn't part them for they are in love, and Loki would never forgive you."

"That does not matter."

"Do I?" Frigga asked. "Do I matter? It will break his heart, and mine also therefore! He needs her and she has no one. She is the daughter of your most loyal friend and you intend to condemn her to a life of solitude?"

"I cannot change the law for her."

"Then please allow me to offer an alternate form of justice." You spoke up. "I will take Kayson's place in the war. This will prove my loyalty to Asgard, while keeping Kayson safe with his daughter as was my intention."

Odin seemed to consider this idea. And while he did so your heart pounded against your chest. Your life would be at stake at war but living without Loki, being all alone after you had known love... would be a far worse torture. But even so, this was war. You had sparred with Loki and occasionally Thor or Sif but that was it. You had never killed anyone, nor fought for your life and the thought was frightening.

"If you fight in his stead as you say, then you will be pardoned." Odin agreed, and you nodded. "You are dismissed."

As you turned to leave, many thoughts ran through your mind at once. Firstly, how could you explain this to Loki? He would never accept it, and even if he did, he wouldn't be able to focus during battle with you there. He would be looking over his shoulder to make sure you were safe,  which would increase the likelihood of him getting hurt. So you decided something as you exited the doors to the throne room and saw Loki come up to you with worried eyes. You couldn't tell him you would be fighting beside him, you would have to remain an anonymous soldier.

"____, what happened?" He asked with concern as he gently put his hands on your shoulders.

"He pardoned me. Queen Frigga convinced him." You lied, evading his eyes, you felt him looking at you strangely.

"He pardoned you?"

You nodded a bit timidly as his hands moved down from your shoulders to your hands. "I suppose it's best not to question it." He continued with a slight smile, though he still looked concerned as he lead you away from the throne room and to the training yard. Unfortunately it was crowded today.

"Greetings brother!" Thor exclaimed, as he walked up to Loki and seemed to be very excited this day.

Sif took this moment to talk to you, away from the testosterone that always seemed exceedingly present. "How have you been Lady ____?" She asked courteously as you two took a little walk.

"Alright I suppose. I am much happier now that I'm with Loki." You smiled.

She smiled a small amount. "Then it is good that you two have eachother. I can see that he loves you." She said with amusement as she saw him looking for you while Thor talked to him. Sif chuckled softly. "I've never seen him so soft and romantic, but around you he's more than willing to please."

You nodded. "I worry sometimes that he might think that he needs to do anything to please me. Just he himself is enough."

Sif smiled and nodded. "He probably needs to hear that."

"I agree. He'll deny every word no doubt."

Sif laughed softly. "Of course." Suddenly her eyes were sad and so was her smile.

"What's wrong Sif?"

She sighed. "It's nothing really."

You shook your head. "I know we haven't had much time to get to know eachother, besides kicking eachother's bums in training-" Sif laughed. "But, " You continued. "I want to be here for you whenever I can. Us females need to stick together."

Sif smiled gratefully. "Thank you, _____, it means a great deal to have a friend." She sighed. "It's... Thor. He treats me as though I am just another comrade, and I used to want that, I used to want him to see me as one of the men. But now.. I think I love him, and he doesn't even seem to realize that I am a woman and a warrior."

You nodded. "Have you tried to tell him how you feel?"

"Valhalla no." She laughed. "He's too blinded by you to see any other."

You stopped walking and stared at her, confused. "What? But I thought that was just a whim of his, gone away with the wind now that I'm with Loki."

She shook her head. "Can't you see he's in love with you?"

"No... not really. He's either quite rude to me or he's extremely friendly with no in between."

"Exactly." Sif asserted. "Trust me. He's in love, or he thinks he is. Between you and me, I think he's simply envious of Loki. Thor has always been able to court any woman he'd wanted, while Loki... was less than desirable. Then you come along and don't give Thor a second glance. He's not used to being second best, he hates it, it makes him feel like he's losing." Sif sighed. "He can be such a foolish oaf, but I love how kind he is deep down, and his fighting spirit. I.. I wish I could have a love like yours and Loki's. You seem so happy together."

You smiled. "Indeed we are. We quarrel now and then, but he's very affectionate and sweet."

"______!" Loki called from afar, causing you to chuckle.

"Ah, there is my lover now." You shook your head with a smile. "It was nice talking to you Sif, we should do so more often."

"Likewise." She nodded with a smile, while you went off to see what Loki was up to.

Chapter Text

"You called?" You smiled as your hand smoothly intertwined with his.

Loki nodded. "Odin has requested a meeting between he, Thor and myself about the war, and I will be away for much of the day I'm afraid.." He explained as he took hold of your other hand as well so you faced him.

"Oh..." You sighed, a little disappointed yet also worried.

"So.. I thought perhaps we could go for a swim tonight." Loki said tenderly as he moved his hand from yours to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

"A swim? Where?" You asked as you wrapped your arms around his neck, your fingers playing with the ends of his black hair, which made him smile.

"I thought perhaps the ocean would do.." He said with a bit of a glaze to his eyes, which looked light blue and innocent in this light.

"Won't it be cold though?" You asked gently.

"That's the beauty of tonight my darling girl. Tonight is the hottest night of the year, have you forgotten?" He asked as he cupped your cheek sweetly.

"I suppose I have. I'm always a bit flushed when I'm with you, so I hadn't noticed how warm it was today..." You said, and bit your bottom lip cutely, which provoked him to kiss your cheek.

"And you always look so lovely when you do.." He said with a little smile.

You gave a breathy laugh then hugged him close to you. "So how long will the waters be warm for?"

He wrapped his arms around your waist and pressed you tight against his chest. "The next few months at least."

"Sounds like fun." You said as you gently leaned back to face him.

"I will meet you at the library once the moon has risen to its full height." He then brought your hand up to his lips and kissed your knuckles. "I look forward to tonight."

You laughed shyly, your eyelashes fluttering a bit as he reluctantly let go of your hand. "And I as well, my handsome prince."

You watched him leave with his brother Thor with a worried sigh, then left to find Sif once again. Loki had trained you well the past few months but you needed more practice, so you approached your newest friend once more. "Hello Lady Sif."

"Lady ____" She nodded with a friendly smile. "They're off to speak with their father I hear."

You nodded. "Yes.. And I worry for Loki." You admitted with a sigh as you two walked around the empty training grounds.

"Why is that?" Sif asked. "Loki may be a little.. em.. small, but he does know his way around a dagger."

You rolled your eyes. "He is not small, he's lean." You corrected, which seemed to amuse Sif somewhat. "Moving forward, I know that he is strong and capable but I love him so I worry. It goes hand in hand, I can't separate the two."

Sif nodded. "I suppose I could understand that."

You nodded as well, and it was silent for a while until you spoke up. "Sif? Can I trust you with a secret? Lady to Lady?"

Now she looked curious. "I believe so, yes."

You looked around to see if anyone was within hearing range before you continued. "I'm going to be fighting in the war against Jotunheim."

The dark haired woman rose her eyebrows in surprise. "Loki approves of this?"

"He won't. Or.. wouldn't rather, if I told him." You felt guilty just saying that you were keeping something from him, even if you did have a good reason.

"Do you find it best to hide this from him?" Sif questioned respectfully.

"Allow me to explain. I asked King Odin if he might consider giving pardon to an ill man in my village who has a daughter to care for. As I lost my own father to war, I did not want the girl to suffer the same fate."

" 'Tis an honorable motive Lady _____, but it is treasonous to mention such things."

You sighed softly. "So I've heard.." You shook your head. "Furthermore, if I don't take this man's place in the war, Odin will forbid me from seeing my Loki on penalty of death.. So I must do this, and before you ask, I must not tell him, for if I do, he will only worry for me and not care for himself."

Sif nodded thoughtfully.

"So," You continued. "I ask if you might help me train for battle. Loki has taught me many tricks and I am good with a bow, but I am not prepared for war." You paused a moment. "Will you help me?"

The lady warrior pondered the idea. "Many times I was laughed at for dreaming of being a protector of Asgard. Men thought I was too weak to fight alongside them, all except Thor.." She looked at you with a sisterly gleam in her eyes. "You have a strong spirit about you, and I think it's time we prove them wrong a second time, whether they know it or not."

~Later, at the Sparring Room~

Thud. You fell flat on your back with a cringe.

"Again." Sif demanded while you tried to get your barings.

"What did I do wrong that time?" You groaned a tad angrily as Sif held her sparring stick in one hand.

"You were day dreaming about Loki." She scolded.

You frowned. "And just how do you know that?"

"A competent fighter can see when her opponent is distracted."

You shook your head. "I wasn't day dreaming like a school girl Sif, I was worrying." You said with a bit of a bite. The constant failure was starting to get to you. And every time you failed you knew what that meant. Dead.

"There is no time for worry, _____. You cannot think of yesterday nor the future, only this moment here and now with your opponent. That is the only thing that exists."

You sat down against the wall and pushed back a strand of sweaty hair that had fallen from your ponytail, then sighed.

Sif's eyes softened upon seeing your discouraged face. "I know that you love Loki, and that you are afraid for yourself as well; I used to be so afraid of getting hurt, or of someone I love perishing in front of me. But I soon learned that I couldn't control that. Only the exact moment that I am living in. Right now. That I can control, so I will. Usually, it positively affects my future and leaves me with a peaceful past."

~That night at the Library~

You waited outside the library for Loki once the moon hovered Asgard and you shifted your feet uncomfortably. You were already a little sore from earlier that day but you had taken a bath before coming, so you weren't dirty at least.

"____, I am sorry to have kept you waiting." Loki said as he walked up to you. "I have much to tell you but let us walk as I explain."

You nodded then wrapped your arm around his. Loki spoke as he lead you to the waters. "Heimdall has heard that Laufey is eagerly awaiting Odin's charge. We do not know why however, so we will be sending scouts through the portals first off. There will be a recruitment of sorts next week to see who will be the best candidates to go with me and Thor."

"What of the Warriors Three? Can't they join you?" You asked.

Loki shook his head. "They will be training the rest of the new drafts."

You two walked across an empty grass field now underneath the shinning moon and brilliant stars up above. "And after that..?" You asked, looking up at the sparkling diamonds with watery eyes.

You felt the soft caress of Loki's fingers on your cheek and you turned your gaze to him. "You have been holding in much stress over the war, keeping it all bottled away.. I wish you wouldn't carry the burden alone."

You sighed softly and wrapped your arms around his neck, giving him a tight hug as he placed his hands on your lower back. The wind blew your hair back as well as the hem of your dress, as you heard the distant sounds of the ocean waves and felt the mist in the air upon your face.

Loki nuzzled down into the crook of your neck and placed a sweet kiss there. You closed your eyes as you kept your body tightly pressed against him, not wanting to let him go for an instant. "Trust me ____, the Jotun's have much more to fear than you do."

You nodded into his chest then pulled away to give him a smile. "You're right, I'll try not to worry, for I know that my handsome Prince is strong and capable."

Loki smiled proudly then bent down to give your lips a soft kiss before he took your hand and lead you to the water. It was not long until you were undressed to your slip and up to your waist in the warm water with Loki shirtless, his arms wrapped around you in an affectionate embrace.

A strong wave pushed against you two, causing you to tighten your grip on him, then another shove of water loosened your hold and by the third he was over taken by a wave when he had lost his focus. You had ducked under it to remain standing and you searched for him, knowing he must be just under the water somewhere. But it was dark and hard to see anything anymore. You started to worry, moving your hands down in the water to try and find him, only to feel two strong arms wrapped around your waist from behind. "You scared me.." You said softly as he nuzzled against your cheek, his skin a little wet from the water.

"I'll always come back..." He said quietly into your ear, his voice soft and full of meaning.

"Always...?" You asked him with soft innocence. The large ocean before you was dark and chaotic now, but you remembered what Sif had said and focused on this moment. Here with him, in love, and together.

He kissed your neck slowly, then on to your jaw and cheeks, murmuring earnestly, "Always."

Chapter Text

The large field was empty of trees and rather far from the palace. The sun shone down on the men who stood there, soon to be soldiers. And among them stood you, a woman hidden under large clothes and binding for your bust underneath. Your cloak cast a shadow on your face, which was stern with determination, as you watched the raven haired prince, your love, speak.

"You are, all of you, here to prove your metal. Today we see which of you has the cunning and swiftness to join my brother and I on a very important task, of which we will be recruiting two of you. If you are successful, you will bring honor to your name."

You hadn't had much time to prepare with Sif, only a week. But you made the most of every moment, and not once had Loki been suspicious because he had been very busy himself. You spent your nights conversing and cuddling with him and your days busy with the business of war...

"Reveal yourself when I call your name." Thor declared as he held a scroll. Your heart clenched. Your name. If it was on there, then that meant-

"Jonas Everson."

"Present."

"Kanan Jarson."

"Present."

The list of names went on randomly it seemed, and with each passing second your stomach became more uneasy until the last name on the list was spoken.

"Darby Bowson?"

It was silent, as the men looked at eachother, as if to search for the man.

"Bowson?" Thor repeated, to which you raised your hand.

"I am Bowson, sir." You said as gruffly as you could conjure, hoping dearly that it was from Frigga's smart thinking that had your name changed.

Thor nodded once then allowed Loki to explain the first test. "Combat is a staple for any military endeavor. However, we are very well provided with that ability with Thor accompanying us on this mission. Therefore, this will not be your first test. Instead, we will test your stealth."

Loki lead the group of men to an abandoned cottage. "Inside of this place I have hidden something which you must retrieve. I will not disclose what or where it is. I will be guarding the home at a different position for each of you. Your duty is to get the treasure without me noticing."

For the first man, Loki stood by the front door, while the others waited in the woods to the side of the cottage. Loki's ears perked up when he heard the back door opening and he swiftly ran inside and escorted the man out. "The next recruit may enter when ready." Loki announced, now standing in front of a window outside.

It was fascinating seeing him like this, so serious, such a leader. If only you were yourself you would tell him how attractive he was being to you right now.

You shook your head. I must think of the task at hand... A treasure. I know Loki, what is a- ah ha! Treasure Cove, the book!

"The next man may make his attempt when ready."

You moved up in line, two more people in front of you now. Where would Loki hide it, being the sneaky bugger he is... Somewhere where a treasure doesn't belong.. where a book doesn't belong. The furnace!

"The next soldier may make his attempt."

You were next after this one, and no one had succeeded yet. You noticed how a tree branch hovered over the furnace and you wondered...

"Next man may make his attempt now."

You hurried over to the tree to the side of the house with light feet as Loki stood guard at the back door. You climbed up the tree carefully and slowly, so as not to make noise. Loki looked around a bit when he hadn't heard anything, but he hadn't saw you so he figure that whoever it was was just trying to fool him by taking too long to begin.

You inched your way across the branch and carefully stepped down onto the roof with hardly a sound. Now. The difficult part. It would take longer, but you wouldn't get caught this way. You entered the chimney carefully, arms and legs spread so you wouldn't slip all the way down.

Loki wanted to check, surely someone had begun by now. But in fairness he stayed where he was, having not any indicator of there being an intrusion.

Slowly, a little bit at a time you made your way down, all the while hoping you weren't wrong about this. Even so, at least you hadn't alerted Loki to your presence, and it would give you opportunity to look for this treasure. But as you crawled out of the cold fireplace you realized that you had no need for that, for there it was, Treasure Cove.

Ever so quietly you exited via the front door with the book in hand, then went back to the other men.

Finally, Loki had had enough and he walked to the group with anger written all over him, thinking someone had simply not gone at all. But there stood a rather small man, Darby, (or _____, little did he know) and in your hands was the book.

Loki looked surprised and took the book from you with a hint of admiration in his eyes. "Well done Darby Bowson. Well done."

Chapter Text

Combat was next, or so was the rumor amongst the men, and sure enough, Thor and Loki lead you to a rope circle in the middle of the dirt, with Thor at the center. "You will each take your turn entering this ring. You will attempt to cause me to step outside of the rope and I will do the same to you. Nadiv." He called. "You're first."

As you waited in line you felt incredibly nervous. This was Thor. Thor!! How were you supposed to- Thud. The first man was out. The line moved up.

You rang your hands together anxiously. He could kill you! You were already more fragile than the other women as it was, he wouldn't know how much to hold back so as to not to- Thud. The next man was out.

You felt a gentle hand on your shoulder from behind and you turned to face the him. He was young, but experienced looking, an old soul, so they say. He had light brown hair slicked back to a pony tail and kind green eyes. "Don't worry Darby, you'll be alright. Just outwit him."

You smiled half heartedly. "Thank you.. What is your name?"

"Kanan Jarson." He smiled.

"Thank you Kanan." You sighed. "I'll try my best."

It was not long until it was your turn. Thor motioned for you to come with his large fingers. "Darby, you're next."

You took a deep breath then went into the ring, knees bent, leaning on your toes, watching him carefully. He was leaning forward ever so slightly which made you think he was going to charge, so just as he ran for you, you spun out of the way, nearly causing him to step out of the circle. The other men voiced their excitement and cheered you on, since no one had defeated him yet, and you were the underdog here.

Thor smirked at you. "Not bad." He admitted then ran at you again. And again you were ready, but he had grabbed your wrist before you could escape him fully. Causing the crowd of men, who had gotten out of line just to see you fight the beefy prince, to groan in dismay.

Thor began to push you back while you had your head rammed into his rock hard stomach, your feet dug deep into the dirt, your hands gripping his forearms tightly. It was a losing battle, you knew, but you weren't going down without a fight. Loki watched on with interest, his eyes thoughtful as he watched your tenacity. But it wasn't enough, Asgard's strong man was too powerful and he pushed you off of him by the shoulders and you fell to the ground with a thud. You cringed from the sharp pain in your back and felt yourself smile at a thought that entered your mind. If only Loki knew it was me, he would have teleported you halfway to Hel.

Thor extended his head for you to take, and you did, which helped you stand. "You fight well for one so small." Thor said with one of those sweet smiles he often has.

"Thank you." You said and dusted yourself off before you went with the other men who had already tried to defeat Thor.

"Good job Darby, you gave him a run for his coin all right." One of the men grinned then slapped you on the back, causing you to cringe and wobble a bit.

"Oh.. sorry."

Chapter Text

Dinner that night was uncomfortable. Despite the cool night air and deep blue sky swirled with purple, and the twinkling lights above, you felt uneasy. Loki was staring at you with calculating eyes and it was making you nervous as you ate your meat. You could just barely hear the murmurs coming from the two leaders who sat on a tree log a little bit away.

"I am telling you Thor I know _____ when I see her, and there have been too many coincidences for me to ignore."

You felt your stomach tighten in knots, as you somehow managed to eat.

"You are talking nonsense Loki. You simply miss her that is all. She is safe with the other women, at home." Thor assured.

"Sif isn't at home." Loki murmured.

"That is because Sif is a warrior!" Thor declared proudly, and slapped Loki on the back, causing him to cringe. "Oh, sorry brother."

"Let me speak to him." Loki said, about to get up, until Thor stopped him. "Loki, how will it look if the men see their leader accusing them of being women when _____ is in all reality at home."

This gave Loki pause. For once, Thor had a good point. "I suppose... you're right. As much as it pains me to say it."

"Good, then it's settled. No need to embarrass poor Darby." Thor said, and ended with that signature smile of his.

. . . . .

The following morning Loki awoke the men in a hurry. "Wake up gents!! Wake up!!" Loki commanded, while Thor finished reading a scroll that was given to him.

At his voice, your eyes shot open. You had to change out of your night clothes, before Loki got to your tent or you could be punished, and if you were halfway dressed he would be able to see that you had binded your breasts back with bandaging. ((Which was not comfortable to say the least))

Quickly you looked for your day clothes, which should be in the trunk, only... they weren't.

"Check" Loki said, a few tents down.

Your heart raced with adrenaline as you tossed all of your things out of the trunk in search of your clothes, but they weren't there either so you put everything back. "Where is it?!" You hissed and grabbed at your blankets.

"Check" He said at the tent beside yours just as your eyes caught a glance of some pants tangled in the sheets. "There." You whispered and threw off your pants and put on the new pair, but just as you found your shirt you heard Loki's voice. "Well Darby I'm disappointed."

You knew not to gasp because it would sound feminine, so you swallowed instead. "S-Sorry sir."

"What was the delay?" He asked, his eyes staring into yours as if searching for something.

"My clothes were misplaced. It was my fault sir, I accept full punishment."

Loki raised his eyebrows in surprise. "I would, but I hate frivolous punishment. You may very well be sent home today."

"Sir?"

"Change your shirt then come outside. My brother has some news." Loki said then left you to it.

You quickly changed and put on your shoes before jogging out to see what was going on. All the men were standing in a straight line, all eyes on Thor.

"We have received news from the All-Father himself." Thor said, his back illuminated by the sun behind him, his red cap fluttering in the wind. "He asks that we do not delay any longer in discovering the Jotun's plans. We must decide who will come with us now." He paused. "I will speak with my brother." He said, then turned to Loki.

You breathed a soft sigh. "I have a feeling that I won't be chosen." You said to Kanan. "I was late getting ready this morning, and then earlier I could not battle Thor."

"No one could." Kanan laughed.

"Yes but you did the best." You pointed out.

"I don't mean to offend, but I am bigger than you..." Kanan said with a small smile.

You shook your head. "But it's a good thing I think, I mean, that I probably won't be picked. At least I won't be in the way..." You sighed.

"We have decided." Loki spoke, his voice clear and powerful.

"Kanan, and Darby will join us."

Your eyes widened in disbelief. Loki... picked me. We are going to accomplish this together, and now that I know he believes in me, that is all I need to endure the cold chills of Jotunheim.

"Kanan, Darby, we leave tonight." Loki said. "The rest of you may go home until the war begins."

Chapter Text

The moment the four of you reached Jotunheim through one of Loki's stealthy portals, you felt a harsh wind bite at your skin in a flury of snow. You wrapped yourself in the fur coat that you were issued before hand.

"This way." Loki said and waved his hand just a bit. You followed his lead until you found a large, icy cave and entered it.

"Are you sure that no Frost Beast slumbers here?" Thor asked cautiously.

"He would have smelled us by now and awoken. Come on." Loki assured, and lead you all inside. With his hands he caused a small light of warmth to glow. "The Frost Giants live near this cave a few miles away. It is nearly dusk now and it will be the perfect time for us to infiltrate their facilities and find their secrets. Thor will stay at the edge of their village in case any trouble arises. We do not want to divulge all of our resources in case we are caught, for then we can still have an element of surprise."

You watched him, attentively listening to his every intelligent word, finding yourself feeling very proud of your Loki. But despite your warm feelings, the harsh atmosphere made it hard to hear so you cast away all distractions and paid close attention to what he was saying.

"Kanan will watch our backs while you and I," He looked at you now. "Breech their defenses and search. Does everyone understand?"

"Aye." The four of you agreed.

"Rest up until then, I will stand guard." Loki said as he took up a position at the mouth of the cave. The others traveled deeper into the cave and sought shelter from the cold.

You looked at Loki from behind, his furs keeping him somewhat warm, his black hair flowing in the wind, frosted at the tips.You sighed softly. It was terribly painful to be so in love and yet also blatantly lying to him. Not only that but if you perished.. he would not know it was you. And if or when he found out.. Or even worse, if he.. No. You couldn't let your thoughts drift too darkly. It would be alright. You were here working together, and you were both more than capable of handling adversity. You both had done it your whole lives alone, but now at least... at least you had eachother.

"Are you alright Darby?" Loki asked, still looking straight ahead. "You haven't left."

You didn't question how he knew you were still there, he had a knack for knowing. "I was just thinking, shouldn't you get some rest? You need it the same as any of us, maybe more. I could stand guard for a shift."

"There's no time for shifts Darby, might as well get your rest while you can." He replied. You couldn't see the smallest of smiles on his face as he said, "Thank you."

As you headed inward you still wondered if Loki knew that it was you all along. Perhaps he had an idea but no confirmation? You closed your eyes but you were only allowed a shallow sleep, for your brain was busy worrying, worrying about Loki.

Finally at dusk Loki awoke you. Thor wiped a frosted sprinkle of drool from his mouth and sat up.

"We need to leave now. Darby, up with me." Loki ordered, causing you to jog up to where he stood. He began walking, eyes calculating, knees just slightly bent and ready to spring.

"What are we looking for, exactly?" You asked him softly.

"Anything really. Hopefully some clue as to their plans against Asgard so we can stop them before a larger mess is to be had." Loki replied then stopped at a large ice wall and pulled you beside him to stand against the cold surface. He inched to the side and peeked out before motioning you and the others to continue.

"Less security than I thought." Loki whispered and straightened his back just a bit then rushed behind a blue crystal building with you following.

Meanwhile Thor was impatiently waiting just outside the outskirts of the city, growing more impatient by the moment. This was not his way of dealing with war and Loki was taking far too long for his liking. "Loki..." He warned.

"Shhh!" Loki hushed and crouched down. You followed his lead and awaited orders.

"Darby, head into that building and search it. Subdue anyone you see with your weapon." You nodded and took a breath before quickly moving towards it. In front of you were plans of their attack. You grabbed them all and just as you were about to leave you heard the pounding of footsteps.

"No!!!" Loki yelled from outside the building as Thor's red cape whooshed past the building you were in.

"Idiot, oaf!!" Loki growled, while you heard fighting outside.

You moved to leave but two Frost Giants entered, towering over you. You felt your heart beat as fast as a rabbit, and you felt just as small and helpless. You backed away from them then drew your bow as they charged at you, causing you to drop the plans momentarily. You pulled back one arrow and shot clean through one man, then shot the other in the chest, and the giants slowly collapsed to the ground.

You picked up the plans once more and peeked out of the building for a second before running outside. "Let's go! I have them! Let's-" You looked around and saw that Loki was in some kind of trance, looking at his hand as if it had betrayed him.

"Loki! Loki!" Suddenly you felt a hand around your throat, squeezing tightly, burning your skin painfully.

"Asgardian scum." The Jotun growled, causing Loki's trance to shatter. He ran to your aid seemingly from the front, causing the Jotun to drop you to the ground and move to attack him but he touched air instead, and suddenly he fell to his knees, with Loki standing behind him.

You felt the stinging pain from the burns on your neck and tears started to bud in your eyes. Loki wrapped his arm around your back to help you up. "Come on Darby, I'll get you healed, don't worry. Come on Thor!" He called.

He received no reply from his brother, as he was fighting, his eyes blood thirsty, killing Jotun after Jotun without thought.

"We must go!" Loki yelled past the winds.

"Then go!" Thor yelled back defiantly.

Loki shook his head with a frustrated groan and left the village, leaving Thor to his fighting.

He lead you all to the cave and he gently sat you down and placed his large hand on your neck and closed his eyes, murmuring. You winced at the contact and tried your very best not to cry.

It was over in a minute or so and Loki sighed, he stared at the wall of the cave as he sat beside you and softly itched at the hand he had been staring at earlier. "I wish she were here..." He murmured to himself, his eyes dulled and clearly showing pain.

"Tell me about her." You said, causing him to look at you. "Maybe it will take your mind off of things."

He nodded and swallowed softly, looking down at his hand again. "She is soft, and beautiful. Her love is what gives me warmth even when my heart feels cold and lonely. She has a daring spirit and she has an intelligence to rival my own. I love her. I never thought I would find a feeling so beautiful and powerful that would conquer the horrible feelings I often struggle with until I knew the love I've felt for her, and.. until I had felt the love she has for me." He looked at you now, into your eyes the way he did when you were back home, or so it seemed. Maybe it was just your imagination, maybe you simply missed him too, maybe you missed holding him and so you saw what you wanted to see when he said, "I love her more than anything."

Thor entered the cave then, breaking Loki's mood. He rose up in anger and faced his brother, who was grinning. "Do you know what you've done?" Loki hissed.

"I believe I have allowed for the retrieval of those plans." Thor said.

"If we had gotten those plans without a fight we might have extinguished the spark of war before it ever flamed. Do you know how many of our men could be killed tomorrow?! Your own friends!"

"Nonsense, they love a good battle!" Thor said, still in a jovial mood.

"How thick are you?!" Loki shouted, his voice echoing throughout the cave.

"Do not scold me brother, you have forgotten your place." Thor said, eyes narrowed.

"My place?" Loki said, his shoulders back, as if ready to fight. "My place is defending Asgard, and that is what I am doing."

"Father has placed me as the first in command. That means that you follow my orders." Thor growled, then pushed passed him. "Loki, send Kanan to Asgard. Once there," He looked at Kanan now. "you must give Odin the Jotun's plans and tell him that war is inevitable."

Chapter Text

After Kanan had left, you sat beside Loki and contemplated something you had long since considered. Should you tell him the truth? It was a difficult decision but you came to the same one. It was better to carry out your end of Odin's bargain than to never see him again, and if you told him who you were he might send you home. Right now there was at least a doubt in his mind that you were actually Darby.

Meanwhile Loki paced around the cave for a while before he finally settled down and sat up against the wall with a sigh, a few feet away from you.

This could very well be the very last time you ever saw him alive and well, and yet you were forced to be still and apart from him. You closed your eyes, only the sounds of the air invading your eardrums, whirling, whistling wind as you imagined...

Loki had you in his arms and kissed your cheeks and mouth lovingly. You felt his warmth reach your chest and you smiled softly as he embraced you. "I love you Loki..." You imagined yourself saying. "I love you..."

. . . . .

The following morning you awoke to a stiff back and neck, as well as cold fingers.

"Sleep well Darby?" Loki asked as he sharpened his dagger with a small tool.

"As well as I can." You grunted and placed a hand on your back.

"Are you going to be well enough to fight?" Loki asked.

"As ready as I'll ever be." You said with a light chuckle. "As long as I have my bow I'll be alright."

"Your bow?" Loki asked, his eyes holding a certain gaze, before he looked down at the ground and smiled. "_____ uses a bow."

"Who?"

"_____." He said, as if just to repeat your name. "She is the woman I told you about yesterday."

"Oh.. That's nice." You smiled, and he nodded.

"The troops will be coming soon, and Thor will lead them. How intelligent of an idea that is I have no clue, but I will need your loyalty, Darby."

"I don't understand."

Loki sighed softly as if he were not sure how to explain this, and he rubbed his neck gently before sitting a bit closer to you. "Listen Darby, the reason I picked you to come with us was because I knew you were smart. You're different than the others. Those men are going to blindly follow Thor, even if it is to their deaths. I am going to try and stop that from happening by influencing our plan of attack. So, no matter what Thor says, I want you up high, shooting with that bow of yours to help anyone struggling down below. Do you understand?"

You nodded. "Yes sir."

"Good man." He smiled, then stood up as he saw the crowd of men forming at the front of the cave.

Thor came back from talking with the troops, a glowing sword in one hand and a shield in the other. "Take this brother." He said, and handed him the shield, then he handed the sword to one of his men.

Loki protested. "Thor, tradition dictates that you-"

"To Hel with tradition. All I need is my hammer." Thor smirked, and twirled it in his grasp. "Darby, up with me."

You looked back at Loki but he simply nodded towards Thor then looked down at the floor at his feet for a moment.

Anyone else would have had a hard time decoding his message, but you caught on quickly. During battle Thor will be busy and at that time you could slip away and do what Loki had asked.

"Darby?" Thor called again, causing you to hurry over to him. "Good. Now men, we will attack their palace with full force until Laufey is captured. Follow me." He ordered and lead the crowd of men onward.

Every once and a while you would look back to catch a glimpse of Loki. You were scared of what could happen. War was terribly frightening and those giants were at least three times your size. You wanted to run back and wrap your arms around Loki and nuzzle into his neck for comfort but you couldn't, so you took in a deep breath and kept a steady expression, preparing to defend Asgard against the race who had killed your father.

You stared at the dark blue ice kingdom in front of you, large and intimidating, yet somewhat hidden by the dense winds of snow. A few minutes later you reached the palace, and at first it appeared unguarded. But then, as you looked more closely, red eyes began to appear and suddenly an army of Frost Giants charged at you.

You took out your sword and fought the blue men up close. The sounds of swords clanging and men shouting filled the air in a flurry of war. You felt overwhelmed by the size of the giants just as you had when you were with Loki. Only this time, three giants were upon you. You managed to defend yourself well enough but they were still alive and you were only one person. Then suddenly two were dead, and you stabbed the third in the chest. There stood Loki who was breathing heavily, his eyes determined. "Get to the top Darby." He ordered, and you sprinted off to find yourself a large cliff to perch yourself on.

You took your bow out from its place on your back and drew back an arrow, squinting against the fog of wind to try and see more clearly. You waited for a clearer shot and just as the wind started to clear you eyed a Jotun sneaking up on a soldier and you shot him dead. You put priority on the men who were struggling then shot any stray Jotun's you could lock on to. Your breath hitched when you saw Loki down below, fighting against four Jotun's and you shot two of them quickly. He killed the other two then looked up at you with a smile. Suddenly his expression fell with fear and he yelled something which you couldn't hear and sprinted off towards your cliff. You frowned, confused. Then you realized that your helmet had fallen off. Loki had seen you as you are, he knew who you really were! You cringed and happened to look to the right...

A beefy Jotun was glaring down at you.

Then, everything seemed to go in slow motion. His arm froze into an ice sword and he pulled it back. You heard yelling in the distance and everything came back full speed. The sword pushed into you and simultaneously sliced and burned you just as Loki threw his dagger at the giant's neck. The Jotun fell on his back, brining the sword out of your flesh, ripping on the way out, causing you to whimper in pain.

"_____!" Loki called worriedly and cradled you in his arms, your hair flowing freely, no longer trapped in the confines of your helmet. "Darling why did you- no, don't speak you must rest."

"I'm fine Loki, really." You assured then cringed, and your fingers gripped into his coat.

"This is all my fault, this is all my fault." Loki mumbled under his breath.

Blood poured from your wound as easy as water flowed through a stream, and Loki's eyes turned dull with subdued terror as he held you closer to him. Your crimson fluid tainted his clothing to red.

"I'm not sure if I can heal a wound this deep sweetheart..." He said softly, and gently moved a piece of hair away from your face.

"You should leave me Loki." You said then coughed up a little blood and he gently wiped it away with his fingers. "They.. they.. need y-you."

"Shh, sh, sh.." Loki hushed and kissed your forehead. "I am not leaving you." He assured and placed his hand on the wound before closing his eyes and murmuring under his breath as he had done before in the cave.

Suddenly you felt drowsiness overcome you and your eyelids grew heavy, the pain slowly becoming distant. "Loki no, I want to be awake."

"You won't be in pain this way." His voice wavered and seemed so far away now and the edges of your vision were blurry.

"Loki no, please." You begged. "I love you.."

You could just barely see his thin lips curl to a small, sad smile. "And I love you my beautiful girl.. but you must sleep. All will be well. You will see me soon." His long fingers tenderly stroked your hair as he said this.

"Promise?" You asked weakly, your hand grasping his with sweet love in each soft touch.

"I promise." He replied, his deep voice surrounding you safely, his head nuzzled close to your own.

You let your eyes close and you fell into a deep, peaceful sleep, not knowing that in reality, Loki was frightened beyond belief and entirely unsure if you would ever awake again.

Chapter Text

You felt moisture on your hands amidst the darkness of your closed eyelids. Then a soft humming in the distance, no.. singing. A voice of man singing to his love.. It spoke of passion and sweet caresses.

Slowly you awoke and heard a gasp followed by sobs. "Loki..?" You heard yourself mumble, then felt a tighter grip on your hand.

"I'm here dearest girl, I'm here." Loki said, his voice wavering. You felt a pair of lips on your cheek as your vision slowly gained clarity. Gently, you smiled as you looked up into his eyes as he looked down on you with red ones, strained from crying.

"We are together." You said softly.

His breath hitched and he nodded gently, his lower lip quivering a bit as he tried to keep composure. "I thought I lost you."

You gently moved both your hands up so you could caress his face. "Our love cheated death." You winked with a smile. "It will be told in the legends how powerful we are together."

He nodded with a joyful smile. "Indeed."

Slowly you sat up despite Loki's protests and you wrapped your arms around his neck then hugged him. "Can you take me home Loki? Do the healers say I have to stay here?"

He looked at a healer, who shook her head. "She may rest in her own bed."

"You will be with me, won't you?" You asked with darling eyes.

"I will fulfill any desire you ask, my dear." Loki smiled and carried you away from the cold healing room and brought you to your chambers where he laid you down and where he sat on the edge to take off his boots.

"Loki?" You asked meekly.

"Yes?"

"How long did you know that it was me and not Darby?"

He chuckled softly, but there was a sadness to it as well. "Nearly since I first saw you, but I thought my eyes were playing tricks. Then when you knew what to find during the test I thought I was certain. But I could not risk looking a fool so I did not tell you."

"Is that why you picked me to go on the mission? Because you still doubted that it was me?" You asked as he lay ontop of the covers beside you.

"No." He smiled. "I picked "Darby" on the off chance that it was you. I needed someone I could trust." His smile faded now. "I was a fool, I should have kept you out of harms way no matter what but I-"

"You believed in me." You smiled, and gently touched his cheek. He leaned in towards your caress and sighed softly before placing a kiss on your palm.

"You are hopelessly optimistic aren't you?" He smirked.

You bit your lip with a guilty smile then said, "A little bit, yes."

He laughed, they way you always adored. "Ehehehe." He kissed your nose then gently ran his large hand down your side like he used to. He paused when he felt the fabric that banded your breasts back. "Oh I don't approve of this at all."

You laughed. "Good because neither do I."

"I'll call for a hand maiden to remove them and dress you for bed." He moved to get up but you stopped him with a gentle hand.

"No..." You said, giving him pause. "Will you help me Loki? After all we've been through I trust you more than anyone to be gentle with me." *

His eyes softened and he smiled seriously before reaching for you and helping you sit upright on the bed. He untucked your blue cotton shirt and untied the wrap that held it around you safely until you were nearly bare in front of him. He was gentle yet nervous in his movements to rid you of the binds and tried to avert his eyes.

"It's alright to look, Loki.." You assured with a gentle smile. "If you want to of course."

He finally aloud himself a full look at your beauty. This was only half of you and already he was vexed. "You would diminish the beauty of any flower, my sweet girl. If ever someone has told you to be different, cast them away from your mind for you are beautiful just as you are."

You smiled softly. "Thank you Loki.."

"May I.. um.. may I touch them, kiss them?" He asked meekly, as if in front of a goddess.

"Only you may.." You said, and Loki smiled before he leaned closer and gently cupped them, one in each hand, and squeezed ever so tenderly. Then he placed sweet kisses over the soft mounds in appreciation, then in between them both, his face nuzzled close to you, his hair in your sight, and you gasped when he wrapped his lips around a nipple and sucked softly, his tongue swirling lightly to give you pleasure before he moved to the next breast and gave it the same attention.

"Loki.." You breathed. "Don't tease me darling, you know we can't act upon any desires just yet, with me injured."

He gently moved from your breast and gave it a parting kiss with his cool breath before kissing your forehead and cheeks, then finally your mouth, deeply exploring where he may, and you moaned softly before he pulled away to give you air. "Of course my love, of course."

He carefully removed your cotton pants then brought you your night gown and slipped it over your head and down your body carefully.

*"Thank you Loki." You said, and placed a kiss on his cheek. "You said you would stay with me tonight." You reminded.

"Of course I will." He assured with a smile and stripped off his clothes in favor of a bare chest and cotton pants. You admired him with a smile as he gently moved to lay on the other side of your bed. "You are so handsome Loki." You complimented, and gave him a kiss.

"Thank you darling." He said, then held your hand and closed his eyes, imagining stars and galaxies until suddenly they appeared in an illusion above your heads, as if projected onto the wall.

"Oh Loki, it's beautiful." You whispered, then felt him shift so he lay on his side, a careful arm draped across your middle to keep you close. Loki stayed awake until you drifted off to sleep.

Chapter Text

You awoke to the feeling of lips kissing your neck and a pair of toned arms gently wrapped around your waist. Loki was humming softly as he gave his affection to you, happily going about his pleasuring. He carefully brought you flush against his body and held your hand before bringing it up to his lips and kissing it, making a trail up your arm.

You giggled softly when he made his way back to your neck and you ran your hand down his naked side stopping at the waistband of his soft cotton pants. "You are certainly in a good mood." You smirked.

"Ehehe..." He chuckled softly against your skin then pulled away slightly to look at you. "We are here together, you're safe, we're in love..." He placed a warm kiss on your lips. "What is there not to be happy about?"

"What indeed." You smiled then gently caressed his handsome face.

"The healers want to look over your wounds today. I was thinking that you could see them while I go with Thor to meet with Odin." Loki said.

"About the war?" You asked. "What happened?"

"Your arrows thinned out most of the Jotun's, giving us the opportunity we needed to overtake Laufey." Loki explained.

"He deserves to be imprisoned for what he's done, both to my father and to Asgard." You said.

"And he will be punished indeed, I assure you." Loki replied, then kissed your forehead.

You nodded, and looked thoughtful for a time as you remembered all that had happened within the last few days. You remembered Loki staring at his hand... "Loki?"

"Yes?"

"When we were in Jotunheim, fighting to get the plans from the Frost Giants, I remember seeing you look at your hand as if.. as if it had betrayed you. Why did you do that?"

Loki's eyes glazed over and his smile faded to a thin line. "I don't remember."

"But Loki-"

He gently kissed your hand then carried you out of bed. "You ought to see the healers now my love."

You leaned against his shoulder with a soft sigh as he carried you. You felt that he carried a burden, one that he did not wish to tell you. But you hoped he would find it within himself to tell you soon because you worried for him.

When Loki had left you, the healers examined you to find that you had nearly fully recovered, but you still needed to rest as much as possible in order to be completely well in a few days. After your examination you went to your chambers and got dressed in a lovely emerald green dress just to please Loki, then roamed around the halls thinking of him.

Last night when he was intimate with you, you had never felt more beautiful. And when he showed you the stars it brought a smile to your face and filled your heart with wonder and awe. He was so romantic with you, yet so cold to others. He was a puzzle that you loved dearly and worried for much. He has always expressed a trust in you, since the day that you saved him in the maze. But with the subject you brought up today he was closed off... Why?

Later that afternoon Loki came to you with a worried expression. "What are you doing roaming about, you should be in bed!"

"I'm fine Loki, the healers said that I'm almost better." You assured.

Loki sighed then brought you closer to him and wrapped his arms around you in a loving embrace. He kept you close and gently kissed your forehead.

"What are you worried about my Loki?"

"I'm conflicted ______." Loki sighed. "My brother is arrogant, reckless and dangerous. If it weren't for you and I, all of Asgard's army could have fallen."

You pulled away just a bit to look into his eyes. "Does King Odin know about what Thor has done?"

"No, and I don't know whether or not I should tell him.." Loki said, genuinely concerned.

"Why not?"

"Odin has never been one to listen to me. If I told him, he may think I'm just trying to take credit for Thor's supposed victory."

"What if I vouch for you? And Kanan? He was there too."

"I suppose we could..." Loki mused. "I care for my brother dearly, but Asgard needs more from its King than rash decisions and a thirst for war."

"So then it's settled."

"Not quite." Loki said.

"What do you mean?"

"I do not want you to be involved in this. So I will need Kanan's testimonial all the more."

"But Loki-"

"Please do not fight me _____. I only mean to protect you."

You sighed and nodded.

"Once I can get Kanan to agree, then I will bring the information to Odin." Loki explained. "It may take a while, since Kanan is probably loyal to Thor like the rest of them."

"Perhaps, but he is an intelligent man. If you spend enough time trying to convince him, he will listen to reason."

"You... trust Kanan?" Loki asked warily.

"Somewhat. He was kind to me during training."

"I see..." Loki murmured and looked down and to the side of you.

"Loki.." You said in disbelief and gently tilted his head to look up at you. "You aren't jealous are you?"

"It's in my nature, I can't help it." He mumbled quietly.

You moved to place your lips on his then cupped his cheek with your hand as he let you deepen the kiss. You ran your free hand down his side and he moaned when he felt your tongue slip inside his mouth. You pulled away after a few moments for breath then you smirked, a light in your eyes. "I want none other than you Loki."

His eyes were love glazed and his smile was goofy. "You are the only person who can persuade me of anything."

"Is that right my handsome prince?" You asked as you put your hands on his hips and he put his on your lower back.

"It is indeed so." He smirked.

. . . . . That Evening . . . . .

You and Loki had finished eating dinner hours ago, and everyone was fast asleep. In the library, you sat in his lap and he held his arms around your waist, a book in his hand. He read to you softly in your ear in a deep and sultry voice, sending shivers down your spine.

"Loki...?" You questioned, causing him to pause his reading and kiss your neck instead.

"Yes...?" He asked innocently.

"Are you trying to seduce me?" You chuckled.

"Not at all my sweet.." He declared, running his hand up and down your side with a softness of touch.

"You liar." You laughed, then turned slightly to give him a quick kiss. "Could you have ever thought that you would have fallen love with a peasant girl who slipped past the palaces walls one night in search of a book?"

"Ehehe.." He laughed, and his arms tightened around you lovingly. "No, but I am more than grateful for the surprise."

You smiled and he gently helped you stand on your feet. "Where are we going?" You asked.

"To the rainbow bridge, I have something I want to show you." He said with an almost boyish grin as he excitedly took your hand.

The rainbow bridge was beautiful as ever, glowing brilliantly with colors streaking down in a blur. Loki held your hand as he spoke to you. "Yesterday I showed you the stars, and tonight I wanted to surprise you with this..." He extended his hand out and there, projected on either side of you was a visual of all of the nine realms at once, side by side, in all their glory. Your eyes widened in awe as you had your eyes on Midgard. It was a scene of the center of London. So simple yet so sweet their lives were... You reached your hand out so that your fingertips just grazed the projection.

You felt a pair of strong arms wrap around your middle, then heard Loki murmur, "You may doubt that the stars will shine, or that the sun will not rise, or that the realms will cease to be.. but my darling, never doubt that I love thee..." His arms left you, so you turned around and saw that he was down on one knee, a ring extended towards you gently. "I love you _____, and I hope to take you on many adventures. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

You had almost forgotten to breathe as tears welled up in your eyes. You were in complete shock in the most wonderful way possible. Somehow you managed to say, "Yes, Loki. Yes!" You smiled widely and he slipped the sparkling ring onto your finger. With a grin he swooped you up into his arms and pressed his lips gently onto yours. Your arms wrapped around his neck and you felt yourself deepening the kiss as he held you close, pressed up against his warm body. You pulled away for a breath and to say, "I love you Loki, I love you, I'll always love you."

"It gives me great joy to hear you say that." He said, then nuzzled against your cheek.

In that moment, as the projection faded away, you felt great joy in knowing that your future with Loki would be one filled with love and passion. You felt his happiness in your chest, and he felt yours. There could not have been a couple in all of the realms as in love as you two that night.

Chapter Text

One week later you found yourself getting measured for your wedding gown. The sketch of it was everything you could have imagined as a little girl. Asgardian elegance with a dash of your own unique style. Your heart was a flutter with the warmest of feelings as you imagined yourself as Loki's wife. While the hand maidens measured you, you thought of all of the wonderful experiences you would have with the love of your life. You imagined that he would take you traveling through all of the realms and you two would see so many beautiful things. Then perhaps after you were ready to settle down, you would have a child or two. You smiled to yourself. Yes, marrying Loki would be quite an adventure.

. . . . Meanwhile . . . .

Loki walked to the Casket of Ancient Winters with purposeful steps, and he placed his hands upon it. He had been avoiding this but now that he was getting married he had to know. He watched as his skin slowly turned blue with horror in his eyes.

"Stop!" Odin voiced, the sound echoing through the golden room.

"Am I cursed?" Loki asked with a wavered voice. He kept his back towards Odin for now.

"No." Odin said a bit simply.

"Then what am I?"

"You are my son." Odin responded with a softer gaze, almost remorseful, full of burden.

Slowly, Loki turned around, his face blue and his arms the same color. "What more than that?" His skin faded back to ivory as he stepped towards his father. "The Casket wasn't the only thing you took from Jotunheim that day was it?"

"No." Odin paused for a moment then explained. "In the aftermath of the battle, I went into the Temple, and I found a baby. Small for a giant's offspring -- abandoned, suffering, left to die. Laufey's son."

"Laufey's son..." He said quietly, almost in disbelief, unable to comprehend it all. "Why? You were knee-deep in Jotun blood. Why would you take me?"

"You were an innocent child." Odin tried to reason, but Loki was having none of it.

"No, you took me for a purpose, what was it?" Loki insisted.

Odin doesn't answer, he looks hesitant, but Loki feels desperation growing in his chest. "Tell me!!" He all but begged his father in a shout.

"I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day, bring about an alliance, bring about a permanent peace... through you. But those plans no longer matter."

"What?" Loki whimpered, his eyes budding with tears. "So I am no more than another stolen relic, locked up here until you might have use of me."

"Why do you twist my words?"

"You could have told me what I was from the beginning. Why didn't you?"

"You are my son. I wanted only to protect you from the truth."

"What because I-I-I am the monster parents tell their children about at night?"

"Don't-"

"It all makes sense now. Why you favored Thor all these years, because no matter how much you claim to "love" me, you could never have a Frost Giant sitting on the Throne of Asgard!" Loki rushed out the doors leaving Odin to watch as the torment consumed his son.

. . . . . .

After the fitting and a walk around the garden you roamed around the palace looking for your Prince. "Loki?" You called as you approached his chambers. You heard sobbing on the other side of the door and your eyes widened with concern. You knocked on the door. "Loki? Can I come in?"

There was no answer on the other side, just crying. Worried, you opened the door and shut it behind you. You saw Loki slumped against the back wall, his hair fallen over his face as he cried into his hands. You went to him and kneeled down, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. He jumped, and looked at you. Apparently he hadn't heard you come in. His eyes were red and his lips were swollen from dehydration, his face was flushed and wet with tears. "Don't look at me." He said with a soft hiccup.

You ignored his request and lovingly wiped away a few of his tears from his face, then tucked his loose hair behind his ears. "What's wrong my love, what happened?"

"I.. I can't tell you. You won't look at me the same way again if I do."

You kissed his cheek then held him in your arms, holding him close as you pet his hair and he leaned against your shoulder. "I will always love you my Loki. Please tell me what ails you."

"I'm a monster.. a monster.." He whimpered, then shut his eyes as the tears began to flow once more.

"You are not a monster, Loki. Would I love a monster?"

"That is the precise question you need to ask yourself. To marry me would be to marry a monster." Loki said between sharp breaths.

You gently ran your hand down his side and sighed softly, worried for your Prince. "Loki you are not a monster and I love you more dearly than anything I possess. I will never let you go unless you ask me to leave."

"Never leave then. Stay here with me." Loki pleaded as the tears continued to flow.

"I will stay." You assured. "But please tell me why you think you are a monster, so I can convince you otherwise."

Finally, Loki found the courage to show you the truth. He concentrated very hard and unveiled his natural form, his skin was blue and his eyes were red, with markings all along his skin.

Your eyes widened in surprise and you gasped softly, then gently reached out to cup his cheek in your hand. "You're a Frost Giant." You whispered softly.

He swallowed hard and nodded. "I am." You could see how he desperately tried to hold back the tears, his eyes glistening and full of water, until he blinked and they slipped down his cheeks. "I'm a Frost Giant." He whimpered, his voice shaky and full of fear and sorrow. "I.. I would understand if you didn't want to marry me anymore."

"No, darling come here please." You opened your arms to him and he wrapped himself around you, his head on your shoulder and sobbing quietly as you pet his hair.

"I'm a monster, I'm a monster." He muttered. You gently hushed him by holding him closer so his face rested against your chest. "Everything will be alright, you'll see."

Loki's tears finally dried but he didn't look much better beyond that. "That isn't all." His voice was rasped as he carefully pulled away from her. He helped her up and stood with her while holding her hands. "Odin told me the truth. I am not Odin's son, but… Laufey's son."

You pulled away in instinct from the realization that you'd fallen in love with the son of the man who'd murdered your father. You shook your head, "Impossible! You're nothing like that murderous king, how could it be true?" Your heart was racing faster.

Loki sighed heavily. "It's true _____, I'm so sorry. I hate it as much as you do." He tried to explain. "Laufey left me to die on a rock and Odin found me and took me in as his own."

You didn't feel angry at Loki because of course none of this was his fault. "That bastard just left you to die?! And when was Odin planning on telling you the truth?" Your glare was so harsh that even though Loki knew it wasn't directed at him he couldn't help but feel a little intimidated.

"I don't think he ever intended to tell me." He said, keeping calm.

You took an uneasy breath to steady yourself then looked into his eyes. "I can't believe someone could just… abandon their child like that. And for the king to lie to his adopted son all those years? I… don't want to have anything to do with them." 

Loki gently held your hand. "You were right before, everything will be alright. Things might have to change to make that happen though."

You didn't know what he meant by that but something in the tone of his voice made you feel like maybe something had already changed...

Chapter Text

Loki sat with his legs wrapped around you from behind, your back against his chest as you sat on the grassy space in the forest. You liked the feeling of him so close to you, his arms wrapped around your middle, his lips placing kisses on your soft hair. You gave a soft little content sigh and smiled.

The comfortable position gave you the safety you needed to think on not so comfortable thoughts. Loki had revealed a truth to you, that he was Laufey's son and although you hadn't told him, it had caused a conflict of loyalties within you.

Would your father look down on you from Valhalla thinking you'd betrayed him. You were soon to be wed and it was a heavy burden to bare. Loki had sensed it several times but you denied it enough to make him realize that whatever it was you just didn't want to talk about.

Never in your life had you imagined that you would have anything to do with the man who ruined your life but now... you were marrying his son. By many it would be considered dishonorable, a disgrace to your father's name to marry Loki.

You felt tears bud in your eyes and you felt him soothingly rub your back.

"I don't want to lose you." You said softly, trying not to reveal how emotional you really felt. "Odin wouldn't tell anyone about your true parentage would he?"

Loki sighed thoughtfully. "I highly doubt it, it would only cast a bad light on himself as well. So... I can be your little secret, no repercussions." He teased, gently moving a piece of your hair from your face.

You smirked softly at the comment before becoming serious again. "Do you think my father would approve of us?"

Loki looked conflicted. "I really wouldn't know..." He said gently. He planned on that being his only answer but when he heard you sigh he continued. "You speak highly of him, don't you?"

You nodded. "He was a very good father, and friend."

Loki smiled, then moved a bit so he could get a better look at your face. "Then, wouldn't you think he'd want you to be happy above anything?"

You thought about it. He never was one for strict tradition or nonsense like that. "Yes, I think so."

Loki seemed pleased with the answer and leaned back, which brought you back with him. "Besides," He chuckled. "Although I was probably there when my wretch of a father killed yours, I don't think I was able to wield a sword just yet."

You smiled a bit. "The sins of the father shouldn't be burdened upon the son."

Loki nodded slowly, looking thoughtful before hugging you tightly against him.

Chapter Text

You awoke from your sleepy slumber the following week a little hazy from a dream that you could not quite remember… You stretched your arms out and exhaled a soft little sigh. Loki and you had not slept in the same bed since you'd come back from battle. 

You didn’t want rumor to spread and right now the absolute last thing you wanted was even more eyes on the both of you, especially after what you'd both discovered about Loki.

But none of this information was present in that fuzzy mind of yours, just the gleaming golden sunlight and the sudden knowledge, as you began to fully awaken, that today was your wedding day! 

Excitement flooded through your body in a jolt of electricity and you sat upright in bed and squealed with glee. “I’m marrying Loki! I’m marrying Loki!” You declared for anyone to hear, tossing a pillow up into the air only to catch it and squeeze it close to your chest. “I can’t believe I’m marrying him, oh how lucky I am.” You smiled, and swung your legs over the side of the bed and hurried over to the bathing room to get washed. You used the special Asgardian vanity chamber to dry your hair then you heard a knock at the door. “Come in!” You called.

“Hello milady, we have come to prepare you for the ceremony.” One of the women said, with two other women behind her.

“Oh! Yes of course, please do come in. Oh! And you have my dress, how exciting, and my breakfast!” You giggled with joy as you watched them file in.

“Yes, my Lady, Prince Loki insisted that we make sure that we offer you breakfast so that you could eat if you were hungry.” The youngest girl said as she carried the tray of food.

“He is always thinking of me.” You smiled. “Go ahead and set the tray down over there.” You said and pointed towards the little table at the corner of the room. The girl did as you suggested and you followed her over there and sat at the seat and began eating the fruit that was in a little bowl on the silver tray.

“Are you.. truly excited my Lady?” The youngest girl asked. She looked unsure, her light eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Hush Leela. Do not question our Princess to be.” The oldest girl scolded.

“What do you mean by your question dear girl? Of course I am excited. Would you not be excited to marry your love?” You asked.

“Why, yes my Lady. I just… I didn’t know that he was your true love.” Leela said quietly.

“Why else would I marry him unless I loved him?” You asked, not understanding.

“Prince Loki is always so cold to everyone. And… many people know that Queen Frigga would do anything to keep him from being lonely…”

“That is enough Leela.” The older sister scolded sharply. “You are lucky that our Princess has been so merciful in entertaining your foolish questions. You must never question her judgment again, do you understand?”

“Yes Rayne.”

“Now come, we must prepare her dress.” Rayne said, and hurried her little sister along.

“My apologies my Princess, my sisters and I are new to serving for the Royal Family.” The kind hearted middle sister said softly, her voice as gentle and smooth as a peach. “My name is May.” She gasped at her mistake. “Oh, you haven’t a need for my name.”

“Of course I do May.” You said as you gingerly finished your food. “I hope to try and remember all of your names.”

“Then we will be very lucky to serve you, Princess.” May said with a slight bow.

You smiled softly. “I haven’t quite gotten used to it yet, the thought of me being a Princess.”

“Your people are very pleased to have you marrying one of the Odin's sons. Although many had hoped it would be Thor so you would one day be Queen, they are still happy nonetheless. Ever since your return from battle, when you defended Asgard in the name of Kayson, people heard tell of who you are and that you are Lydell's daughter. He was well loved by us all. He had such a kind heart, as well as a warrior's spirit, and we are sure that you have that as well.”

“Thank you." You smiled, then looked concerned. "Do many people know that I am Lydellsdottir?”

“Yes my Lady.”

“I see..”

“Your dress is ready my Lady.” Rayne said. You nodded then took one last bite of bread before you went into the wash room and changed into a robe so that you could get your hair done. You sat in an armchair while May did your hair.

“Prince Loki is very lucky to have you my Lady.” May said.

“I am very lucky to have him.” You smiled.

“You know, my sisters and I have only just started working here a few months before we saw you. Excuse me for saying so my Lady, but Prince Loki used to always have such a sad little scowl on his face whenever I would see him walk down the halls… But then, when you came, sometimes, I would see him walk down those same halls all by himself but in the middle of his cold expression he would smile, just a little bit, like he was thinking of something special. I think he was thinking of you.”

The thought warmed your heart and an overwhelming feeling became you. You missed him already, you had only just awoken and you missed him. “I want to see him, May.”

“What? No! You can’t my Lady, it is against tradition!”

“He won’t see me really, I just want to hear his voice, oh please say you’ll help me.”

“I really shouldn’t…” May said, glancing over at her sisters who were too busy quietly arguing about something.

“Please?”

“Well… Alright, but we must be quick, I do not want the All-Mother to catch us!”

You quickly hurried out of the room with May and she helped to keep watch while you slipped down the halls and finally arrived at Loki’s room. You heard tapping on the other side, probably a nervous Loki tapping his boot.

“Loki?” You called, and instantly he was at the door, but he did not dare open it.

“Darling? Are you alone?”

“No, I’m with May, she’s sort of my escort I suppose. How are you?” You asked through the door.

“Alright, I missed you though. I cannot wait until we are wed, it is driving me mad and I fear that at any moment Thor will barge in here and give me a hug and start wailing.” You could almost hear him shiver on the other side of the door and you chuckled.

“Hopefully he won’t but you know how he is, deep down he just wants you to be happy, and now that we are getting married he hasn’t been pinning after me.”

“That is true…” Loki agreed.

“Listen… I just wanted to say that I love you and try not to be nervous okay? Your family, our people, our past, none of that matters today. All that matters is you and I and how much we love each other.”

He was quiet for a moment before he spoke. “Thank you _____, I needed to hear that.”

“You’re welcome Loki.” You said sweetly then gasped. “I think I hear footsteps, I’ve got to go, I’ll see you soon my Prince!” You assured, then hurried off with May back to your room.

May expertly styled your hair in good time and soon your locks were in beautiful waves with a small braided crown at the back. Then the ladies helped you put on a fresh face by using the magic they learned as girls. Your skin was flawless for this special day and as May and Rayne helped you into your shoes and dress you felt tears bud in your eyes. It finally felt real. Loki was going to be your husband. And it all started that fateful day when you decided on a whim to sneak past the palace walls in the search of a single book. You remembered when you saved Loki’s life from the snakes in the maze, and when you danced with him on the rainbow bridge, when he finally admitted that he was in love with you. This feeling was surreal and fantastic and completely wonderful.

“You look absolutely beautiful, Princess.” Rayne smiled and you looked surprised.

“We might as well start calling you that now, you’re due in the celebration room in a few moments.” May said cheerfully.

You looked at yourself in the mirror for a little while longer. You had dewy skin, pink lips and your gown complimented your shape exquisitely in ornate ivory and golden swirls. For the first time, you had a glimpse of how Loki saw you every day, even when you had just awoken from bed, or when you were dirty from battle dressed as Darby, you looked beautiful, not only because of the magic and the gorgeous dress, but because you were glowing with love so pure that it radiated off of you.

“Come now Princess, we mustn’t keep him waiting.” Rayne said gently, and they escorted you to the celebration room, behind two large golden doors.

You took in a deep breath as you savored this moment. The moment you ended one chapter of your life, and began another. The doors opened and your eyes immediately found Loki, dressed handsomely in leather pants, a dark green shirt and a leather vest, a traditional Asgardian scarf draped over his neck falling down his shoulders with a pattern of circles decorating it. You did your best to ignore the slew of eyes staring at you from the guests that the King and Queen had invited, and instead, as you walked, step by step towards that handsome raven haired man at the end of the long aisle, you focused on him.

Finally, you were beside him and you smiled sheepishly as you snuck glances at him while he grinned from ear to ear as you two attempted to focus on the All-Father.

“The couple will recite their vows now.” Odin said, then nodded towards Loki.

“_____, before I met you I thought my heart had frozen to its core. But when I saw you here, in the library, the way your eyes lit up at the sight of so many books, I felt the outer edges of frost melt and realized that my heart was not so cold after all. It is because of you that I smile and have a passion for life again. 

I love you with all of my heart and it is from this love that these vows are spawned. I vow to protect you with all of my strength, keeping you safe from monsters and terrors. I vow to kiss your hands if they hurt you, and wrap my arms around you in a warm embrace if sadness befalls you. I vow to love you with every breath that I breathe and cherish you in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, as long as we both shall live.” Loki finished by taking the ring from Thor and showing it to you as he held your hand. 

“What I have engraved on your ring is what I want you to remember if ever I am away or if there is even a hint of doubt in your mind. It is what I told you that day on the rainbow bridge and it will always hold true.” Loki said, and gently slipped the ring onto your ring finger, then quietly spoke the words he had engraved on the outer band. “Doubt that the stars do shine but do not doubt my love for thee.”

You smiled with great joy then breathed in a soft breath and began reading your vows to Loki. 

“I was so lonely before I met you, my love. I did not think that I would ever find someone to love me as much as you do and I very much doubted that you would be able to convince me of the depths of your love, but your actions and words prove it to me every day. You are so strong and intelligent, and you always make me laugh. You make me blush when we are alone and you help give me courage when my resolve starts to weaken. 

I love everything about you just as you are and I hope to live many more years standing by your side, and loving you with all of my heart. As your wife to be I vow to cradle you in my arms whenever you are afflicted. I vow to be loyal to you above all others. I vow to stand by you as the years progress and defend you if ever an enemy arises. I vow to love, honor, and cherish every bit of you in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, as long as we both shall live.” You took your ring from Sif then held his hand as you said what was engraved. “You are my love and I will stay beside you."

Odin smiled just a little bit then declared, “I now pronounce you man and wife. Loki, you may kiss your bride.”

Loki smirked happily then deftly moved his arms around your waist then dipped you down and kissed you passionately. You had a goofy smile on your face when he brought you back up and you wrapped your arms around his neck and held him close.

You two held hands as you walked down the aisle together and everyone threw flecks of golden confetti into the air in your honor.

Chapter Text

Part III: Heart or Dagger

You squeezed your hands together nervously as Loki came out of the healing chamber. In a manner of a few months everything seemed to go wrong… Thor was banished to Midgard after it came to light that war could have been avoided.

Odin and Loki’s relationship, what remained of it, became more and more strained. What was a comfort to you however is that you had him. It was the one constant you had in these worrying months…

“How is he?” You asked Loki nervously. He had a look on his face that you just couldn’t read, a mixture between confusion, sadness, and… awe.

“He is in the Odin Sleep… Mother fears he may never awaken again.” Loki said with a wavering voice and gripped the golden scepter in his hand. That was when you actually first noticed it. “The throne has fallen to me.”

You suddenly looked more alert and felt twice as anxious. You knew as well as anybody that Loki had always felt that he would be better suited to be king than Thor, and you never disagreed with him, but now that it was happening it just felt… scary. You didn’t realize that you were panting from stress and looking down and away from your raven haired lover until you felt his soft hand guide your face to look at him. “What ails you, love?” Loki asked in such a silken voice, calming like an ocean wave.

“It’s just happening so fast… everything.” You frowned and closed your eyes tightly with a heavy sigh. 

He carefully brought you into his warm embrace. “You mustn’t worry my darling girl… This will be nothing but good for us I assure you. I will make sure my foolish brother doesn’t come near Asgard again, he is much too dangerous.”

You nodded with a sigh, then Loki said, “Come, follow me… My Queen.” He said with just the slightest of smirks as he led you to the throne room, but before he could say anything else you were interrupted.

“Loki.” Came a voice as footsteps echoed in the throne room. 

After a long conversation with them you realized that they were going to go after Thor and try to bring him home, and you weren’t sure if you should tell Loki of your suspicions…

Chapter Text

After Loki had left to attend to matters as he called it, you roamed the hallways of the Asgardian palace with an odd feeling in your gut that was quite unwelcome. It felt like a heart break that had not yet happened. Perhaps you were being a bit silly or scared because you and Loki had married more quickly than most Asgardians. And yet, your intuition was rarely wrong. You felt a change in Loki, and you feared that change came from the power he held. The way he would talk to you was different now, he loved you, yes, but his eyes glinted with something else too.

You sighed and nervously pushed your hair to the side before you felt someone hug you from behind. "What's the matter love?" He asked as he nuzzled against your back.

You chuckled to yourself, finding yourself to be worried over nothing for certain. "Nothing is the matter my dear."

"Oh? Then why do you look it?" He asked with soft concern before he kissed your cheek.

"Just, I'm afraid you might change."

"Change? Me? I'm as constant as the sun." He smirked as he turned his head to see you a bit.

You shook your head in disbelief. "More like the sea, my dear."

He scoffed. "Nonsense. Now, what makes you feel this way love?"

"I just feel uncomfortable with you becoming king so quickly." You admitted as you turned around to face him and hold his gentle hands.

"Ah, I see." He said with a certain amount of regret. "I may be a bit different now, but it won't last forever. I assure you, once I have become accustomed to my position as king, all will be well."

You made a noise of protest before you were interrupted by a messenger who had given a note to Loki. He scowled as he read it, then huffed before sending the messenger off. "Listen, I need to attend to something. I should be done before bed." He assured, before he walked away, leaving you without time to ask any more questions.

You watched after him as he walked away, and you sighed heavily.

Chapter Text

As he left, you felt an emptiness in your heart, and a sinking feeling in your heart. As you walked through the palace you were reminded of the journey that took you to this place. You walked in a sway, almost dancing through the halls in silence, embracing the feelings that this palace gave you, remembering the first time you met Loki, and the love you two had, as well as the adventures. You walked out to the garden to look at the stars, and found yourself roaming around through the dewy grass and sighing to yourself. Why did you have this awful feeling even though you were trying to be happy? This happened sometimes, when you were alone or just clear of thoughts. There would be this terrible feeling that something bad were to happen or was happening. Occasionally nothing would come of it yet you were sure that it was right, even if nothing bad happened to you, it could be someone else that you knew nothing of.

You walked for hours before setting down in the grass and feeling the gentle wind on your skin which chilled you and gave you goosebumps. Nothing but open field now where you were, and the rainbow bridge to the side. Suddenly you heard a loud crack of lightening and your eyes shot open to see a bright light fill the sky as the bifrost slowed it's spin. Thor was back! It must be him or else why would lightening show. But what was happening?

You stood up in a flash and took a few steps forward to try and see. You caught a glimpse of red cloth and golden hair then saw frost encase the bifrost. "Loki?" You muttered to yourself with confusion as you saw a corner of his cape flutter out of the bifrost. It was then that you realized that this was a battle between the two brothers and not an unknown foe. You picked up your skirt a bit and ran as fast as you could to the stables, it would take too much time to run all the way across the rainbow bridge. You saddled Hammy and rode off towards the bridge as fast as you could, then across it before stopping a little over halfway. You told Hammy to go back to the stables to keep him safe. He was reluctant at first but after some encouragement he left.

"Loki!" You called as loud as you could, but they couldn't hear you over their intense battle and the crashing waves below. Your heart was pounding with worry, you continued to feel that growing dread in the pit of your stomach that you just couldn't shake. Something was about to happen and you had to stop it. Before you could do anything though, Thor came flying out and landed on his back, you hurried over to them as Loki strode out of the bifrost confidently, his eyes were ice cold and he seemed so unlike himself. So distant, uncaring. It scared you to see him like this. He spoke with cool calculation to you, "Stay back, this is between Thor and I."

"No it is not. There will be no winners in this fight!" You pleaded and tried to walk closer but there was an invisible wall keeping you away, Loki didn't comment on what he'd done but you knew it was his magic. "Loki stop please! You're brothers! You're better than this!"

Loki seemed to ignore you he attempted to stab Thor, but he rolled away in time and reached his hand out for mjolnir. You were forced to watch in horror as the two clashed and fought, meanwhile the bifrost was very clearly breaking. You noticed the cracks forming and slowly started to back away in fear. "L-Look out!" You stuttered, then started to run back. Loki glanced at you when you'd said that and suddenly a bright flash of white light filled the air as it exploded and the two of them went flying up. Its force had pushed you back and you slammed into the bridge. Surprisingly, you were't too injured. But once you looked back you saw the two falling down and could hear Loki's scream as they did so.

You ran towards him as fast as your wobbly legs could take you, nearly falling over yourself as you went but the explosion had pushed you so far away. You watched as he fell and only then noticed that Thor had landed on the broken bridge while Loki had barely caught the edge of it with his hand.

"Loki!" You called out for him desperately. "Just hold on I'm almost there!" You could barely breathe as you felt the rough winds blowing all around you and your feet pounded against the bridge.

Loki looked so scared and alone as he watched you get closer. Then his expression changed to something else entirely, something you couldn't quite explain and the closer you were the worse it got until finally you saw him slowly letting go of the edge and your heart raced in fear and you felt the sting of shock enter your body as you quickly knelt down to grab his hand but at that instant just before you were able, he had let go, allowing only the brush of your fingers to touch as he drifted away. Your hand only grasped the air and you panicked, moving more of your body over the edge to try and grab him, then even dangerously further as you saw those sorrowful blue eyes with flecks of green drift away, he seemed to be saying something to you but you couldn't hear him and tried even further to catch him but a pair of arms grabbed you and pulled you back onto the bridge forcefully to keep you from falling. You couldn't even think about what was happening, it was all such a blur. All you could manage to do was whisper in a timid sob, "Loki, please... Don't go."

You felt icy tears slip down your cheeks while the love of your life fell farther and farther into the void and was soon gone from sight.

You heard Thor say something, but he might as well have been speaking another language, because you couldn't comprehend anything at the moment.

You felt hollow, and cold.

Chapter Text

You didn't know how you ended up in bed. There were no thoughts or emotions just an empty feeling. Just loss. An echo of life surrounding you, outside of you. Stars shined dimmer now. They didn't seem alive anymore. You stayed staring in this state of disbelief with a body that felt like liquid and a heart that was numb. That feeling you felt the moment his fingers slipped away from you never went away.

In the morning when you awoke you barely moved, just stared, as if surprised that you had awaken at all. This reality was strange. It wasn't true. Yet the emptiness in the room, the lack of warmth in the air, the lack of light, told you otherwise. Loki would have opened the curtains and teased you for sleeping in so long, Loki could have brought light into the room with just his smile. But that glow was gone. Forever.

You weren't aware of what was happening as the servant women came to help you get dressed and try to feed you. Your gaze was far off into the distance, as if each and every moment was trapping you into reliving the pain of seeing him slip away. They had guided you out of the room and you walked forward with absence of yourself. Eventually you roamed the castle for hours by yourself. You hadn't eaten or even thought of eating. In a sense, you'd lost your mind to grief. Somehow though, your feet led you to the library as it always did and you could have sworn you'd seen the traces of Loki's boots entering the room. For a moment you found energy and hurried to the door and opened it but Loki was not there. You looked around in dismay and started pulling books out of the shelves. Was he hiding?

You searched for far longer than you should have and finally, you sat on the couch where you two had once read together and then hid your face in your hands, your body slumped over in sorrow.

"What are you crying about love?"

You gasped upon hearing Loki's voice then turned to your left and saw him. But... was it really him? He was smiling so brightly and full of playfulness like he used to when you two first met. "L-Loki?"

"Don't act so surprised love." He smirked with a chuckled then leaned back casually.

You gently reached out to touch him but felt... nothing. "You're not-"

"Ah, don't mind that. Just a product of being sucked into a warp hole." He assured, looking back at you with those eyes of his that captured you so easily.

You knew deep down that it wasn't him. It couldn't possibly be him, but in your subconscious it told you that if you wanted to believe in life, in hope, that you would have to lie for now. You had to lie to yourself. Because you didn't really believe there was life after this. You didn't really believe there was any hope. You didn't believe. But you lied, and it kept you alive for now.

As time passed the pain dulled ever slightly moment by moment. But the numbness never changed. You felt hollow and sad. Eventually you couldn't even muster the energy to pretend that Loki was still around when you were by yourself.

Thor did his best to be a friend to you in those times, and you found yourself being better friends as time went on. It was nice knowing that you weren't the only one hurting.

One day Thor asked you, "Do you feel like you've come to terms with what happened?"

You nodded. "I suppose I have to but… I guess I still have trouble sometimes."

His smile was soft and sad. "I understand, it will take time."

Eventually you dedicated yourself to learning about your mother, the woman who you previously knew next to nothing about. In the hall of records within the palace, you should be able to find something.

After hours and hours of pouring into those books you discovered a passage about your mother.

"A woman born of Midgard…" You said to yourself. Suddenly everything seemed to click. No wonder you had been fragile your whole life. You suddenly felt a spark. A feeling you hadn't had in a very long time.

Just at that time, Thor entered the room.

"I'm of Midgard and Asgard, Thor." You said in amazement.

Thor looked surprised. "Is that what you were doing in here?"

You nodded. "You've been there, what is it like? Is it nice?"

"Different than here for sure." He chuckled. "But I did like it, they aren't as weak as my father makes them out to be."

"Then I'm going. I've got to see if maybe I have any other family." You said.

"Will you stay if you do?" Thor asked.

"I… I don't know." You said with thought. "I just want to see where I come from.

Chapter Text

You'd spent almost a year on Midgard when S.H.I.E.L.D finally took notice of you and asked for your help on an artifact they were studying. Once it was discovered that you were of both Asgard and Midgard, they felt like they'd hit the jackpot in finding you.

In that partnership you'd made friends. Even still, no one was able to help drive away the cloud that constantly made your heart heavy, but, at least you weren't entirely alone.

The tesseract, you told them, was a dangerous artifact. One that they should give up to Asgard for safe keeping, lest unruly types try to take it from them by force.

Of course, they didn't like that idea. They thought it would be a perfect chance to bring Earth up to the universe's standards. You couldn't blame them for being scared, but you did think they were inviting trouble.

Nick Fury brought you and a few Shield agents into a room with a large curved window to see the test from.

"We've been noticing very odd readings from it." He said to you all. "Today was the only time that they wouldn't stop. We brought you all to witness whatever develops."

You watched as the cube glowed brighter and brighter until suddenly, in a flash of light that blinded everyone for a moment, a cloud of smoke formed around a tall figure with an ominous presence. As the smoke cleared, so did your eyes and you saw… him.

You felt as though your heart stopped. Not believing your eyes at the same moment that you were forced to. You walked closer to the glass as the remaining Shield members stayed silent.

Director Fury looked at you and noticed a certain expression in your face which prompted him to ask, "Do you know this person?"

The words got stuck in your mouth as you wordlessly stared at his black hair and now sunken and tired eyes. His expression was wild. It felt like a nightmare. The scientists ordered the stranger to stay motionless, but instead he pointed the scepter at an agent and fired a blast through his chest.

Director Fury ordered everyone to evacuate and to keep the stone away from the invader. You felt your mind fade even as a Shield agent led you to a vehicle to escape.

It was like you blinked and you were suddenly on the bed of a truck across from said agent, and finally, somehow, you gathered your bearings as the driver attempted to get you all out of there.

"I… I know him." You said, so quietly you were surprised he heard it over the noise of the truck and the explosions following you.

"What? Who?" The Agent asked, confused.

Then, you finally answered Director Fury's question, despite it being past the point where he could have heard you. "That man is my husband."

Chapter Text

Once word spread of your relation to what they considered to be a terror threat, you were taken to yet another Shield facility. Not long after that, however, you overheard that Loki had been captured.

"Alright, so this is what's going to happen." Director Fury said as he stood across from you as you sat behind the metal table silently. "Once they bring him here, I'm going to need you to ask him these questions. He'll be more likely to answer honestly to someone he trusts." He said, handing you a piece of paper with the questions for you to memorize, but you didn't even glance at them. Right now, you had a million questions of your own, not that any of them mattered to Shield.

"Can you do that?" Director Fury asked, but before you could respond, he stopped for a moment as he received a message into his earpiece. He cursed. "What do you mean he escaped?" He said in a dangerous tone. He was silent for a moment as he heard the response then he shook his head and looked at you. "Change of plans. Looks like you're up."

The dream you had deluded yourself into believing could one day happen was here, and yet, you were terrified. Something about all of this felt so wrong that you couldn't possibly feel the joy you once hoped for.

. . .

As Thor, Captain America, and Iron Man fought over the captive, you were escorted off the plane then left to intervene on your own. They probably thought you had powers to protect you, but you didn't. Not compared to people like these.

When you stepped out of the forest and into sight, Thor stopped and stared at you. "What are you-"

Suddenly he was tackled to the ground by Iron Man, but your eyes were locked, as they were from the beginning to Loki, who was sitting on the floor with his hands cuffed together, watching the three of them fight, silently. An odd smirk crossed his lips as spotted you. He tilted his head as he stared. 

You were lost for words as you walked up to him then knelt down and timidly touched his arm, half expecting your hand to pass through, but it didn't.

You wanted to embrace him with every fiber of your being and yet… you didn't. Something was holding you back, and that something was really two things. His smile wasn't as it once was, pure and genuine. It was crooked and conniving. The second was that his wedding ring... was no longer on his finger.

He caught on to the subtle look of confusion and sadness on your face after you glanced at his hand and he chuckled. "Don't look so surprised."

You carefully pulled your hand away. Then your eyes looked at your own ring as you remembered so many happy memories from your past together. A pang of realization hit you like a lightning strike to the heart, like a core piece of you had broken. You were alone. Again, you had lost someone special to you. This was your cycle, wasn't it?

You snapped yourself out of it with a slight shake of your head before you looked at him. "You may have thrown away your promise to me, but I will hold on to mine, for now." You decided.

"A poor decision, really." He mocked, knowing how much you would hate it. "It wasn't all that much fuss for me to part with. Why should it be for you?"

Feeling defensive now, with a brew of anger, you decided that you wouldn't let him know the tears you shed over his perceived death, you wouldn't let him know how it had nearly broken your mind. "That's a good question." You said as you stood up. "When I find the answer you'll not be near me to see it, I assure you."

You hadn't realized it, but the other three had stopped fighting, and, as they'd come to a decision, Thor looked at you with sympathy, and Loki, anger. "How can you torment your own wife?! Have you any idea what she's-"

You stopped him with a wave of your hand. "It’s alright. I've been a widow once, if again I shall be, then so be it." You said the words, but they were such a lie on your tongue. In your sorrow, it seemed, you had lost a bit of your softness. You ignored Loki now and looked at the others. "What have you decided?"

"We'll take him back to Shield and discuss it there, ma'am." Said the man in the red, white, and blue uniform.

"Then I'll come with you." You said. Whether Loki had forsaken you or not, you still needed those answers. Without them, you would likely never feel peace.

. . .

Once on the helicarrier, Director Fury filled you in on what Loki had done before he'd been captured. He showed you footage of the people he'd killed, of the disturbing monologue he gave, up until he was captured.

"Look, I know that must be hard to see." Director Fury said as he turned it off with a sigh. "You seem like a good person, I doubt you would have married someone like that willingly."

You shook your head, your eyes fading away, disassociating from where you were and the horrors you'd seen from the man you loved, lost, and likely would lose again if you hadn’t already. "I did marry him willingly. He was different then, he was kind and happy. Then, something terrible happened and I thought… I thought he was dead."

Agent Coulson had been beside Fury and he looked concerned. "Maybe we shouldn't put her through all of this. From what Thor has told me… she's been through a lot."

Fury sighed again before he spoke to you. "Well, it is up to you if you want to ask him the questions we've-"

You stood up suddenly and took a deep breath, stopping his sentence. "I will not ask the questions you want. I do not side with him, but neither will I betray him. I will ask him the questions that I myself need answering. If you can find value in the answer, then fine." You said, then walked up to Agent Coulson. "Will you please show me to his cell?"

Coulson looked at Fury, who nodded, and soon you were walking down the hallways towards Loki. You reached the final door and Coulson opened it for you. The moment you stepped through the door, it shut behind you.

Loki was sitting on the bench of the glass prison with his legs spread and he perked up a bit when he saw you, but not the way he used to. Not like he was happy to see you, more like he was amused to see you, like a cat seeing a toy mouse.

You slowly walked towards him, and he stood up and slowly walked towards you.

"Well, well, well… What brings you here I wonder.” Loki chuckled as if he already knew the answer. “Helping your new friends, hm?”

You shook your head slightly and sighed. You looked down to take a break from his gaze so you could gather your nerves and look at him face to face. “No. I have my own questions that need answering.”

“Oh?” He mused with a smirk. “And what might they be, widow of mine?”

You didn’t let his jeering bother you. “I will tell you, but first, I ask that you speak your truth and just that. I don’t want a lie of neither pity nor malice.” You paused for a moment before you continued, “With that said. I ask you, Loki Laufeyson… has there ever been even a moment when you loved me completely?”

Loki was quiet for a while, and, as he was introspective for a time, you saw a flicker of his old self in his eyes before he answered you. “Yes.”

He looked away from you now. “More than just moments... I loved you more than anything.” His faint smile betrayed him as he was caught reminiscing while turned to look into your eyes, and over your every feature. Still, his smile faded away as time moved on without you. “But that feels like a lifetime ago, when I was a fool, and that’s who love is for.”

You might have felt pain from that statement had this happened before your heart was broken and rebroken, but as much as you’d tried to run away from your grief, you had never really escaped it, and instead of feeling a shock of sadness, you were instead forced to realize that it had never truly left. “Thank you, for telling me the truth.”

Loki laughed quietly. “And why do you assume that?”

He’d actually made you smile a little at that statement. “Perhaps you no longer love me, but I still know you.”

Loki smiled a little more softly now and shook his head. “And you? Are you still a fool for me?”

“I’m becoming less foolish by the second, actually.” You quipped. “Perhaps by the end of this conversation, I can be enlightened like you.” You said with sarcasm.

Loki laughed again and for a moment, you both were looking into each other's eyes, smiling. For that instant, it was almost like old times, how he used to tease you and you would give it back to him. But then… that moment was gone, and your smiles were too.

“Anything else?” Loki asked, folding his arms over his chest.

You looked away from him. “I had wanted to ask you what happened, or why you changed, but I’ve seen what you’ve done now, and how you look at me, and I’m realizing…” You looked up at him again. “It doesn’t really matter, now does it?” You said with a sad smile, before you turned and left the room.

. . .

There wasn’t much you could do but watch. Watch as Loki and his Chitari army tore apart New York. You hadn’t been surprised when he’d escaped, he was too cunning. You remembered how smart he’d been as a leader against the Frost Giants, how he was always studying how to be a better prince as he hoped to be a good king. Now, you saw him standing on top of Stark Tower, basking in the destruction of your people. The son of your father’s murderer, and now himself, a murderer of your kind.

You sat on the edge of the balcony of a building close to Stark Tower with your feet dangling off the railing like you used to sit on the rainbow bridge before Loki would pull you back to keep you safe. There were no strong arms to pull you back now, and part of you didn’t even care. Your worst nightmare turned out to be tame compared to what your future held in store. As the loud explosions and screaming innocents went on in the background, you slowly took off your wedding ring and looked at it. It was funny, he’d only gotten it for you because he’d researched Midgardian traditions. Such a sentimentalist.

You looked over at the man himself now and smiled, almost madly, as you felt tears well up in your eyes. You couldn’t help but laugh at how ridiculous it all was. A pain so deep that it made you laugh. And in your moment of madness, you didn’t realize that Loki had noticed you. Or that it was in his brief moment of distraction that he didn't notice the huge green Hulk lunging at him.

Your eyes caught a glimpse of motion and then, you saw Loki being thrown around like a ragdoll by that green beast and instinctually, every other concern and tear fell away to the wayside. You noticed that a piece of broken pipe from the fight connected the two buildings now. You took off your sweater to use it as a zip line across until you jumped onto the top floor as the frighteningly large monster threw Loki around and slammed his head against the concrete, over and over again.

“Stop! Please!” You cried out desperately. As the creature turned his head to find the source of the noise, you saw an opening and suddenly tackled Loki out of the large hand of the unsuspecting beast, who was hesitant to hurt someone who wasn’t his initial target.

You covered Loki with your body at first then turned around to face the creature with Loki behind you on the floor. “He’s had enough! You’ll kill him!” You exclaimed in fear.

It was then that the rest of the Avengers arrived, including Thor, who looked at you with sympathy. “Step away from him. He’s not the man you once knew.”

You were too panicked to find it in you to leave him just yet. “I know. I know that.” You said as you looked into Thor’s eyes with anxiety. “Please, he’s too injured to hurt anyone anymore. I just can’t…” Your sentence was left unfinished, caught by a sob in your throat, but Thor didn’t need you to finish it to know what you meant.

I just can’t bear to see him die again.

. . .

When it was time to send Loki back for his trial on Asgard, Thor had assumed you’d want to stay on Midgard, but to his surprise, you’d walked up to them.

“I want to go with you.” You said with some hesitation, worried that Thor had thought you’d lost your mind when you had tried to protect Loki after everything he’d done. “Even if these are also my people, Asgard is my true home.” You gave this as your reason, but really, you didn’t feel like you belonged anywhere. Your family was dead and your husband had forsaken you and everything you thought he’d believed in.

You hadn’t wanted to admit that the real reason you wanted to go back was so that Loki wouldn’t be alone, and neither would you. After you’d nearly seen his death for the second time, the residual panic had lingered and kept the spark of love for him alive despite all of his wrongdoings. Maybe it wouldn’t matter, maybe he would still feel nothing for you, but you were in no mental state to be strong enough to go against your heart and your instincts. Maybe one day, but not now.

Chapter Text

You waited outside as Loki stood trial for his crimes. As you paced the floor you twisted your hands together with anxiety. Eventually, the two large double doors opened and you saw Loki walk out beside two large guards. You said nothing as you watched him leave until Thor came to you.

“What happened?” You asked worriedly.

“My mother and I have convinced my father to lower Loki’s sentence from execution, to life imprisonment,” Thor explained. “You may speak with him once he’s been escorted to his cell.”

When the time came, you walked through the gilded hallways of Asgard until you were escorted to your trusted horse, Hammy, who had been taken care of by the stable hands while you were unable. You felt guilty but Hammy seemed to just be happy you were back.

Wearing a long blue cloak, you soon found yourself being escorted into the deepest, darkest prison of Asgard until finally, you saw Loki before you. You waited until the two guards had left before you took off your hood.

Loki had been laying on a bed just tossing a golden cup in the air before he caught it as he caught sight of you and he sat up to look at you. “Here you are once again.” He said, although he sounded a little annoyed. “And to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“A parting gift.” You said, trying to keep your composure. He tilted his head slightly with curiosity as you looked back and forth to see if the guards were watching you closely. When they were distracted, you closed your eyes then took out a book and slid it past the barrier’s defenses.

Loki slowly stood up and walked over. Once in his hands, he flipped through the pages, expecting to see something akin to contraband and somewhat excitedly so, but no, it was indeed just a book. “What use is this?” He asked with irritation as he flipped it upside down and shook it.

You shrugged your shoulders. “Nothing really. I just thought you might get bored without anything to read.” You explained, but as you started to leave he spoke up.

“Stop.” He said with narrowed eyes. “Don’t you have anything else to say?” 

When you shook your head no, he could practically feel the internal sadness radiating off of you.

“You’ve learned magic in my absence haven’t you?” He became angry in your silence. “And delved deep enough into the arts to pass through spells as strong as this. So then, why don’t you help me?” Suddenly his eyes changed to a sickly sweetness, one of coercion. “Darling, I was not in my right mind. I swear.” He said with a pleading smile.

You didn’t budge. “Don’t speak to me with that poisoned tongue as if I’m an infant so easily swayed. I meant what I said, Loki. I know you and I knew my husband, once.” You said, as anger and hurt bubbled over. “I lost the person who mattered most to me and now, all I’m left with is his husk. I only brought that book so that you wouldn’t forget how things used to be.”

“Is that right?” Loki scoffed with a low chuckle as he drew closer to the barrier. “Your lack of logic is only surpassed by your stubbornness. The truth is, you desperately want me to remember, hoping that if I become lost in that memory I will be filled with regret and beg for your forgiveness.”

“No, that’s not-” You contested, but he continued.

“You want what we used to have so badly that you’ve deluded yourself into believing that you don’t care if my former love for you is truly lost.” He chuckled as he held the book in one hand, the lines at the corner of his mouth curved with his smile. “You say that this book in my hand is a symbol of your departure, but in truth, you are just a prisoner in a different kind of cell whether I ever see you again or not. The truth is, you will never, ever, free yourself from that fate and neither will I free you. I will from now and ever onwards loathe any reminder of you and the only regret you’ve sparked in me is that we ever shared anything at all.” He narrowed his eyes as he looked down at you with that same towering form that once caught you trespassing the palace.

You were quiet for a moment or two as you looked away from him before you took a deep breath and faced him once more. “So be it.” You looked at the book in his hand and smiled a little before you put your hood back on, you started to walk away, then stopped and turned back, the shadow of your hood hiding your face now. “Since you’ve lost your sentiment, perhaps you can read it to the end without me this time.” You said with a soft but sad laugh and walked down the hallways once more.

After Loki was sure that you’d left, he looked at the cover more closely and he did in fact remember how he knew this book. It was the first one that you’d read together, although not to the end, since you’d fallen asleep against his shoulder. Having nothing else to do, he decided to read it.

. . .

A few weeks passed without any visitation from you. It was starting to really annoy him now that you hadn’t come back to see him like he’d been sure you would. He paced the floor nearly every day and had reread the book you’d given him countless times.

On this day, however, something different had happened. Loki heard the guards fighting and screaming about the Dark Elves attacking. As they perished, a plan hatched in his mind on a way to capitalize on this chaos. When a large Dark Elf walked by him, he said, “Try taking the stairs to the left.”

Loki was sure it would be Thor there, since he had pieced together rumors that he would be. He didn’t know how wrong he was, until, two days later, Thor had appeared before him.

Loki rolled his eyes, realizing that his plan hadn’t worked. “What do you want?”

Thor's gaze was downcast and when he finally looked at Loki the first words out of his mouth were, “I’m sorry.”

Loki wanted to joke about how ridiculously solemn Thor was being, but the words got caught in his throat. He felt a dense feeling in the air. Something was wrong. “Tell me.” He said with quiet intensity.

Thor sighed heavily before he was finally able to look his brother in the eyes and tell him that his wife had been killed by Malekith while defending both Jane and their mother.

A storm brewed in Loki’s eyes as his hands clenched into fists. “You’re lying.” He hissed in anger. “Where is she? Tell me now! TELL ME!” He yelled and slammed his fist against the enchanted wall.

“She’s dead!” Thor exclaimed with anger and sorrow. “Mother asked me to offer you a chance to say goodbye at the ceremony-”

“No!” Loki said stubbornly. “Did she put you up to this? Did _____ put you up to this?! Did she?!” He cried out as the magic pulsed out of his hands from his anguish and knocked over his belongings against the walls. “Did she set you up to this so I could say what she wanted me to?! Did she?! What, that I-I love her and have always loved her? Is that it?! Is that what she wanted, Thor, is it?!” Loki’s eyes were frantic and vulnerable, a side to him that Thor had never seen before.

“Mother said that before _____ passed...  she’d said that she hoped her death brought you freedom.” Thor said quietly.

“What kind of rubbish is that?” Loki spat. “Why would she think that would solve anything? I never said I wanted her dead! Never…”

“I don’t know.” Thor said honestly, then sighed. “Asgard will honor her name as a warrior at the ceremony tomorrow night, are you saying then that you won’t attend?”

Loki laughed bitterly with a shake of his head. “A warrior. When I met her, she was a book thief with a butter knife...” He said as a sob in his throat quieted his voice and drained him of his energy, his eyes drifting off to a faraway place.

Thor left Loki to himself, knowing that none of his words would provide comfort, and having no intention of making him feel worse for his misdeeds than he likely already did.

. . .

True to his word, Loki hadn’t asked to see the ceremony. Thor returned to see him the following day though and asked him to help them find Malekith using one of the many hidden portals Loki knew about.

Loki's hair had frayed and his eyes were sunken in as the god of mischief sat slumped against the wall with the book you’d given him lay open across his legs face down. “You want me to help you ?” He chuckled quietly. “And just why would I do that?”

Thor folded his arms over his chest. “Vengeance.”

Loki was quiet for a long time, but Thor waited patiently for his answer. Loki slowly ran his thumb over the top of the cover of the book. The moment his finger had grazed over it, he felt, for a moment, that he was back in the library with you, reading to you, noticing you’d fallen asleep against him. Thinking… thinking about how happy he was. He remembered how it felt to be close to you, to feel your love radiating onto him instead of your pain and sorrow. Everything that you were was gone now, forever, and no amount of grieving would ever bring you back. “When she thought I was dead, I assumed she’d forgotten me quickly.”

Thor shook his head. “At one time, when I was jealous and foolish, I thought I could sway her away from you, but as I saw her mourn, as I saw her break, as I saw her desperately search for a way to bring you back even if it meant delving into magic she shouldn’t, as she fell further and further into darkness I realized that it could have only been created by a once devastating light, one that I did not possess.”

Loki shook his head as he failed to understand how he could have been that for you, even with all of your shared happiness. He wasn’t perfect by any means. Not like you’d been in his eyes, but maybe that was the truth of it in itself. You saw him as he’d seen you.

Finally, Loki looked at Thor with newfound determination. “I accept your bargain.”

. . .

Much and more came to pass since Loki had been granted his vengeance through the death of Malekith but it did nothing to soothe his soul. You had truly gone for good and all he had left was to try to make you proud one last time before he left this world, even if you weren’t there to see it, and, by the hand of Thanos, he eventually did.

So, it seemed that two powerful loves had been balanced by two equally great losses…

But was that the only way it had to be?

~ To be Continued in… Never Lost~