Chapter Text
Moving out of Japan had been Aizawa's idea, and encouraged by his therapist.
In my professional opinion , Aizawa had told him, I think what you need is a clean break .
His therapist had said, It'd be good for you to get away, at least for a little. It's a good learning experience to take a gap year.
Upon hearing his tentative post high-school graduation plans, Toshinori sent out Katsuki's name to a few abroad hero programs, and maybe unsurprisingly, Katuski found himself in the United States.
Studying and training in a new setting gave him exactly what he was looking for. Although he still pushed himself the hardest he could, the competition was harder than UA just from the sheer size of the country alone. He found himself in the uncomfortable dilemma where he could either break himself trying to be the best, or accept a learning curve. He chose the latter.
He stayed in America for much longer than he had anticipated. He liked the people, the places, the food, and the heat of Miami. The criminals were of a different flavor, and the quirks came with a challenge.
He liked the recognition that came without notoriety. He was no longer the kid who ruined All-Might and instead was the pro-hero Dynamight who hailed from Japan.
A clean slate.
On his 28th birthday, he found himself ranked at number pro-hero 12 nationwide. The awards ceremony was a hazed out blur and he called his parents crying the second he stepped off-stage, indescribably happy. He sobbed into the receiver as his parents laughed on the other side—a country away.
He kept an eye on Japan's stats; how could he not? Pro-heroes Deku, Creati, and Suneater consistently chased one another for the number 1 spot, but it was obvious that none of them were in it for popularity.
Rank doesn't matter as long as people are being saved , they all affirmed, and as this the explicit mentality of the big three, the Japanese ranking system became basically arbitrary.
Despite this, when the new year's rankings revealed pro-hero Red Riot ranked at number 9, a spike of pride seared through Katuski's chest.
He pulled out his phone to text Kirishima, then paused. He had no number or contact name.
How long had it been since they'd last spoken? Katsuki thought back, devastated when he couldn't come up with the answer.
Katsuki had always had acquaintances, but looking back, that was probably where he went wrong. He had thought of friends as liabilities, especially in the line of work he was in. Surrounding himself with people who wanted his help in exchange for their help was fine because ultimately they could shake hands at the end of the day and go their separate ways.
But now he had no one to know that the only contacts in his phone were his parents, his therapist, and his secretary.
He stared at his phone for a long moment, before remembering they followed one another on Twitter, and pulled up the app. He sent a quick DM with trembling fingers: Saw the rankings, fuck yeah man. Congrats.
He turned his phone off, not expecting an immediate reply, and sat in his empty apartment staring at his empty walls and empty shelves, and thought: am I lonely?
The answer? A resounding yes .
Inko had a habit of calling while Izuku was on patrol. He'd told her multiple times that he wasn't allowed to be on his phone while he was on-shift, but. Nevertheless. He checked the caller ID and gave an apology to the UA student he had taken on as an intern. White Lie shrugged, regretfully used to it by now, and he stepped a few feet away.
“Hey mom.”
“Hi Honey, is this a bad time?” Inko asked through the phone, and Izuku smiled. “No, it's fine. What's up?”
“Just wanted to call and see if you'd heard about Katsuki.”
Izuku's heart skipped a beat. “Is he alright? I haven't checked the global news yet today—he's not injured is he?"
As he spoke, Izuku frantically pulled out the tablet he carried on his hip, and typed 'dynamight USA' into the search bar. He'd done his best to keep up with the American news, enough to know that pro-hero Dynamight was doing incredible things in the United States, (Izuku had long since realized that he would never be anything but awed by his work) but as the years had gone on and he'd become more wrapped up in his own work, he'd stopped scanning headlines.
“He's fine honey. Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I just ran into Mitsuki in the supermarket, and we got to talking.” Inko soothed.
“Oh. How is she?” Izuku asked, sliding his tablet away.
“She's fine, her mother's getting a hip replacement and—anyway that's not why I called. Katsuki is coming home for a while.”
Izuku blinked. Then his brain caught up with what he heard. “Wait, Kacchan's coming back to Japan?”
His mom hummed confirmation. “Mitsuki says that the agency he's working for is giving him extended time off. So, to make up for the times his parents have come to him, he's coming to them.”
“Well that's nice.” Izuku said faintly, thoughts racing. “Is he...does he. Are we going to see him?”
Inko was silent for a beat. “You don't have to if you don't want to, but I think I will. I always see him in the news, but it's been...oh, at least a decade since I've seen him in person. I bet he's grown so much.”
Izuku murmured agreement. In the corner of his eye, one of his sidekicks (he'd say favorite, but he's been told he's not allowed to claim favorites) began speaking to White Lie. They looked at him expectantly, and he sighed.
"Can we talk about it later?"
"Of course. Put some bad guys away for me!"
Izuku laughed. "Always. Love you."
He walked back to the pair, and his sidekick, Lionlily said wryly, “And here I thought we agreed on no phones on patrol.”
Izuku grinned at her. “Do as I say, not as I do.”
“Hey! Give that back!” a shrill voice cried further down the block. "Someone! Help!"
Lionlily glanced at him. “Looks like our cue."
She took off, not waiting for a reply, White Lie followed close behind her. Izuku smiled and chased after them.
Katsuki had underestimated how long the flight was from Miami to Hamamatsu. After 16 hours in a plane and 2 and a half hours in a layover in Honolulu, the plane successfully landed at 9:36 pm. He and his secretary, Natalie, stepped off the plane shaking the stiffness from their legs.
In the terminal, they were greeted by Mitsuki and Masaru holding an American flag and a sign that said “Bakugou”.
“Hey hag.” Katsuki smiled and fell into his mom's open arms. She didn't say anything, but slightly swayed and Katsuki let himself be rocked.
She broke away from him to greet Natalie in English, and Katsuki wrapped his arms around Masaru.
Natalie accepted a quick hug from both Mitsuki and Masaru before excusing herself to baggage claim. Mitsuki watched her go, and turned to Katsuki with a devilish look in her eye.
“She's cute.”
Katsuki rolled his eyes. “She's still pretty shaky with her Japanese, please don't harass her.”
Mitsuki crossed her arms over her chest and narrowed her eyes. “When have I ever been known to harass people?”
Katsuki laughed, tugged her in for another hug, and pressed a kiss into her hair.
The drive home to Mustafu consisted of Katsuki translating for his parents Natalie's food preferences, dishes she wanted to try, and where she wanted to travel. When she mentioned wanting to see Tokyo, Masaru offered to take off work to show her around.
“That's sweet, but I can just take the train. I like to think that I'm fairly adaptable.” Natalie assured, leaning forward and addressing his parents instead of Katsuki.
Katsuki laughed before translating, knowing "fairly adaptable" was an understatement. That was part of the reason why they got along so well. Natalie was flexible where Katsuki was not, and she had long since learned to roll with the punches rather than spend their whole working relationship in battle.
They'd started working together shortly into his second year in America when his hero agency decided he was ready for more publicity. Katsuki was reasonably fluent in English by that point, but his supervisor didn't want there to be any miscommunications in scheduling and the press, so he hired Natalie to take care of his day-to-day. She ended up being the perfect addition. She was as much as (if not more than) a perfectionist as Katsuki, and shared his extreme aversion to failure.
Katsuki had told her multiple times that if she ever decided to start hero work, he'd gladly mentor her, but each time she just looked at him dead-eyed and told him that not everyone wanted to die before age 35.
And when he'd quietly called her to confess that he was thinking of returning home for some time, she'd asked him when, and booked them two tickets. He hadn't even asked if she had wanted to come, but he knew that she'd known he'd need her there.
The car pulled alongside the Bakugo's house, and Masaru parked it on the street. Katsuki pulled his and Natalie's bags from the trunk and followed Natalie and his parents into his childhood home.
His mom was showing Natalie the guest room, his dad was pulling leftovers out of the fridge, and Katsuki took a moment to just stand in the foyer and breathe. It smelled like home.
This will be good , he told himself, ignoring the twinge of nervousness that sparked low in his stomach.
He heard Natalie loudly gasp on the second floor, and he groaned knowing what Mitsuki was showing off.
His bedroom hadn't changed in the slightest since he'd last been home, and it was covered in posters. A majority of which All Might themed. When he reached his room, Natalie was flipping through one of the romance manga he had on his bookshelf, and laughed at him, loud and happy.
“Shut up,” he grumbled in English, which apparently didn't need translating because Mitsuki cuffed him lightly on the back of the head.
“This is amazing. I had no idea you were such a nerd!” Natalie exclaimed, delighted.
Katsuki glared at her, before rolling his eyes and joining her by the bookshelf. He grabbed the book out of her hands and started flipping through it idly. He remembered that he had read it for the first time sitting on the floor of the bookstore while his mom had gossiped with a family friend, and felt the ache in his chest that accompanied fond memories from long ago.
Nostalgia.
“This is so weird,” he mumbled and eased the book back into the empty spot Natalie had pulled it from.
Mitsuki cleared her throat from the doorway.
“If you two would like something to eat, we can heat up what Masaru and I had for dinner?”
Katsuki translated, and Natalie nodded eagerly. “Please!”
Mitsuki smiled at her and took her back to the kitchen. Katsuki spared one more second looking at his walls, and followed them downstairs.
Every Wednesday morning for the past two years, Izuku found himself in a booth of a cafe nestled between a wall and Ochako Uraraka. Across from them sat Tenya, whose shoulders took up nearly a whole booth on his own.
“Wow, so are you going to see him?” Ochako asked, stirring a packet of sugar into her tea.
Izuku looked into his breakfast sandwich. “Honestly, I haven't decided yet.”
Tenya rested his hand on his chin, his own breakfast sandwich already gone. “You don't have to. You're both adults living adult lives. There's no obligation to.”
Izuku sighed. That's what had been bothering him. He and Katsuki's relationship used to be so complicated and so intertwined that they couldn't do anything without the other knowing and reacting to it.
The key phrase to that, of course, being “used to”.
Then Katsuki had somehow managed to do the unthinkable, and left Izuku all alone.
Izuku had struggled with that for years; the idea that the one person besides All Might he looked up to and modeled himself after could suddenly board a plane with no return date. The one person Izuku thought would be the only constant in his life suddenly was a country away and making a name for himself without needing any of the help or guidance that Izuku needed from him.
He had been left unmoored. It wasn't a good feeling, and he'd thrown himself into his work to distract from the deep unease.
Eventually, after one too many hospitalizations, he confided in Kirishima—the only other person he knew who was as affected by Katuski's absence as him.
Kirishima had sighed (dark smudges under his eyes) and simply said, If he's let us go, maybe we should let him go too.
Izuku had taken those words to heart. The only semi-real contact they'd had was a mutual following on their professional social media accounts.
Although, if Izuku was honest with himself, he had hoped Katsuki would have texted or called him at some point. Even if it was just a promise (i.e.: threat) that Katsuki would catch up to him and become the ultimate number 1 hero.
Still.
“Auntie Mitsuki invited mom and I over for dinner tomorrow night. Mom has already said she'll go. I think I might too. Just to see.”
Ochako and Tenya exchanged a glance, but didn't press the issue. The conversation moved on to the date that Tenya went on the night before, and Izuku put Katsuki aside for the time being and focused on his friends.
“What does this say?” Natalie asked, pointing to a plaque underneath an abstract statue of what Katsuki thought was a bird.
Katsuki translated for her and Natalie said, “Weird. Take a picture of me standing in front of it.”
The pair were doing “touristy shit” today, as Natalie so eloquently put. She'd decided that doing tourist shit included taking pictures at every local landmark, visiting every museum, and shopping at every even mildly interesting looking store. They were spending the day in Shizuoka, and as much as Katsuki wanted to be annoyed by the walking and stopping, he found himself charmed by the mountain views.
He took the picture of Natalie, and handed her phone back to her. Once she deemed it Instagram-worthy, they moved on down the park path.
That morning at breakfast his mom had mentioned that Inko was coming over for dinner to see him. She didn't mention Izuku, but his presence was implied.
“What're you thinking about?” Natalie asked, linking her arm through his. It broke him out of his thoughts.
“Just thinking about people I used to know.”
“People from UA?” Natalie asked and Katsuki nodded with a sigh.
They walked along together in silence for a bit before Natalie asked, “Do you want to meet up with any of them? It's been a while.”
Ah. And wasn't that the big problem. “I...would like to see them, yes.”
“Then why are you sighing like we're not on vacation right now?”
Katsuki scoffed and unlinked their arms. Natalie turned to face him, all patience.
“I doubt they'd want to see me.”
Natalie cocked her head. “Because you used to be an asshole?”
Katsuki gave her a flat look. “Yes, Natalie. Thank you.”
Natalie shrugged, unbothered, and reached for his arm again. Katsuki allowed it and they walked a little farther. He stopped again and blurted out what was really on his mind.
“I've been gone for ten years, and no one tried to contact me.”
Natalie mouthed oh . “I can see why that would sting.”
Katsuki put his free hand to his forehead. “I'm...worried. That I burned all my bridges. I don't have...I mean, you know what my social life looks like.”
Natalie nodded, indeed knowingly. “Pretty bleak.”
“Exactly. And I might not have been Mr. Popular in high school, but I at least had some people I could talk to. Or, well, I thought I did.”
“But no one reached out.”
“Yeah.”
Natalie stared at him, and he could see the gears turning behind her eyes. “Did you reach out?”
“Well—no, but—“
“Friendship is a two way street, big guy.” Natalie said, blunt, but not unkind.
Katsuki deflated. “Yeah. I know.”
“But it still hurts, huh?”
Katsuki hummed in affirmation, and Natalie rested her head on his shoulder. He leaned back into her, soothed.
She leaned away from him after a moment, and they walked on. He waited for her to ask him why he hadn't reached out—why he hadn't made that first move, and was terribly relieved when she didn't.
Natalie shook her head. “'Mr. Popular'. Hah. Hey, speaking of, did you know I was nominated prom queen?”
“I don't know what that is.”
“Do you not have prom in Japan?”
“No. Is it important in America?”
“Deeply.”
Izuku's life tended to revolve around his shifts and whether or not he was on one. The day saw him with yet another patrol shift accompanied by White Lie and Lionlily. Not that he had an issue with patrolling with them, but it certainly made it difficult to ignore his growing sense of deja vu.
That weird feeling had been happening to him more and more often lately. When he brought it up to Shoto, a bit fearful it might have been the effects of someone's quirk, Shoto shrugged and said: “It's probably because your life's becoming monotonous.”
Sero, who'd been sitting with them, had snapped his fingers. "Yeah, yeah! Like that one movie! With the groundhog!"
"What." Shoto had said, and that had been the end of the conversation.
White Lie and Lionlily were arguing behind him about some TV show they both liked, and as Izuku turned around to give meaningless two cents, he caught sight of Katsuki Bakugou taking a selfie with a stranger.
He froze in place, and Lionlily bumped into his back. She whipped around to see what he was looking at, guard raised. When she saw who he was looking at, she murmured, “Are they a threat?”
Izuku snapped out of his stupor and laughed, a little shocked. “No, just an old...uh, someone I wasn't expecting to see."
At least not until tonight, He thought, watching Katsuki roll his eyes at something the woman he was with said to him.
Katsuki was dressed in civvies, a souvenir baseball cap crushed over his hair. He looked incredibly out of place before Izuku realized it was just because whenever he'd thought of Katsuki, he'd only ever pictured him wearing his hero uniform.
“Well. Are you going to say hello, or just keep staring?” White Lie drawled.
Izuku tore his eyes away. Katsuki hadn't seen him yet, but he was beginning to look in his direction.
“No, we can...” Izuku started to walk away, but stopped himself.
His heart was pounding, scared ( desperate ) that Katsuki would see him first. Don't be a coward.
And, with that, he turned to his company and said, “Wait here a moment.”
He was about halfway to Katsuki and the stranger before Katsuki looked his way. Izuku watched his jaw slacken and recognition take over. The woman he was with turned to see what he was looking at and frowned at Izuku—not in anger, but confusion.
Izuku stopped in front of them, and belatedly discovered that he wasn't ready to talk to Katsuki yet.
He cleared his throat. “Uh, hey Kacchan.”
“Deku, hey.” Katsuki replied, wide-eyed.
There was an ugly pause, and Izuku turned to smile at the woman whose eyes were bouncing between them like she was wondering if she might have to break up a fight.
“Hi! It's nice to meet you. I'm pro-hero Deku. Um, Kaachan and I went to UA together, and middle school before that. I'm guessing you two proabably work together..."
He trailed off when he noticed she was staring at him like he was speaking another language. She looked at Katsuki and said something in English, too quick for Izuku to make out. Whatever it was, it snapped Katsuki out of his daze. He turned to her and replied in English before addressing Izuku again, scratching his neck
“This is Natalie, she's my secretary. She came with me for vacation. She doesn't speak Japanese.”
“Oh! Oh, I'm sorry,” Izuku said to Natalie, who must've followed the gist of the conversation, because she smiled and waved it off.
Katsuki turned back to Natalie. He said something else to her and motioned to Izuku as he spoke. Izuku caught “Deku” and “Izuku Midoriya” and assumed Katsuki was making introductions.
When Katsuki stopped speaking, Natalie turned back to Izuku and smiled again. She had a very nice smile, Izuku noticed, and blushed a little. Katsuki snorted, and Izuku blushed a little more.
“Hello, it is nice to meet you. My name is Natalie Hart.” Natalie said in semi-passable Japanese. Izuku smiled at her, pleased for the effort.
They lapsed back into silence, and Izuku felt his smile leak from his face. He and Katsuki stared at each other for a moment in tangible silence, before both speaking at the same time.
“Mom—“
“I think—“
They both stopped and stared at each other some more. Then started again.
“You go—“
“Ah, sorry I—“
Natalie stated, very clearly, “ Jesus Christ ,” and wandered away.
Katsuki watched her leave with a slightly frantic look on his face. Izuku could appreciate the sentiment.
A quick glance over his shoulder showed Lionlily and White Lie watching the scene with equal levels of annoyance and confusion. Lionlily tapped her wrist in the universal gesture of “we're on the clock” and Izuku nodded.
Katsuki was squinting up at the sky, and Izuku cleared his throat again. “I have get going, but, um. Your mom invited my mom over for dinner tonight.”
Katsuki nodded. “Yeah, I heard. You coming?”
“Yeah. Was going to,” A thought suddenly occurred to him, and his heart rate spiked again.
“Unless, uh. Unless you don't want me there—I mean it's fine if you don't, totally understandable, it's your house after all. I just, your mom invited both of us, my mom and I, I mean, and I always liked your mom's cooking. Not that I don't also like my mom's cooking! It's just one of those things—!”
Izuku knew that his voice was progressively getting louder as he went on, and watched a woman and her child in a stroller gawk at him as they passed behind Katsuki. He was nearly sure he'd never been so grateful for Katsuki when he interrupted Izuku with a frantic, “Yep, see you there!"
“Awesome!” Izuku squeaked, furiously grateful for the exit. He did a sharp 180, head ducked, and beelined for the relative safety of Lionlily and White Lie.
Halfway there, he remembered his manners and pivoted again to yell: “It was nice to see you Kacchan!"
Katsuki already had his back to Izuku and was stalking to where Natalie was waiting, but he threw out a thumb's up above his head. Natalie waved goodbye to Izuku as Katsuki grabbed her elbow and dragged her away in the opposite direction.
Izuku felt Lionlily come to his side, and begged “Please...don't,” before she could say anything.
White Lie sauntered up to his other side and asked, “Now what the fuck was that?”
Izuku buried his face in his hands, and groaned. “No one special—just the one person I've looked up to my whole life.”
White Lie cocked her head. “All Might?”
Lionlily said, “No, the other one.”
White Lie nodded sagely and asked, “God?”
Izuku and Lionlily turned to stare at her. White Lie stared back. “That was a joke.”
Izuku laughed feeblely, but felt hysterical tears rise when he realized that's what his night plans were going to look like. Lionlily rested a hand on his shoulder and asked sympathetically.
“Would beating someone up make you feel better?”
Izuku sniffed, miserable. “Yeah.”
A few hours later, Izuku and Inko stood on the Bakugo's front doorstep. Inko rang the bell, and Izuku turned to his mom in sheer distress and asked, “Should I have brought wine?”
Inko replied, “Oh, shush,” as the door opened.
Mitsuki invited them in with a loud greeting and warm hugs, and brought them to the kitchen. Masaru smiled at them from over a pot on the stove, friendly and familiar. Katsuki was chopping onions on the counter beside his father, and Izuku felt some of the nerves leave his shoulders when he saw that Katsuki was weeping with the tears that came with that particular task.
Katsuki looked up at them, eyes red rimmed, and waved the knife in greeting only to be immediately yelled at Mitsuki for kitchen safety.
Inko gasped, and put her hand over her heart. “ Katsuki, oh, my baby. Look how big you've gotten!”
Katsuki smiled, soft, and put the knife down. “Aw, Auntie Inko, not that big.”
He washed his hands in the sink and crossed the kitchen, stooping to hug Inko, which proved her point.
When they broke apart, Izuku realized that it was his turn. Katsuki appraised him for a second, and Izuku held out a hand—a peace offering. Katsuki took it, shook it once, very professionally, then hollered for Natalie.
Natalie said something from the dining room, and poked her head out. She zeroed in on Izuku, grinned, and shouted, “Deku! Hello!”
“Oh my,” Inko said as Natalie approached with a smile wider than All Might's.
“Auntie Inko, this is Natalie,” Katsuki stated, and repeated the reverse statement to Natalie.
Inko and Natalie hugged, then Izuku and Natalie hugged, before Natalie disappeared back into the dining room.
“Girlfriend?” Inko guessed.
“I wish,” Mitsuki said at the same time Katsuki made a sharp noise of disgust and shot Mitsuki a look of betrayal.
“Oh my,” Inko said again, and pulled out a bottle of wine from her purse.
Dinner wasn't the disaster Izuku was expecting. Conversation flowed easily, even if Izuku and Katsuki only spoke to each other to ask for a bowl or a plate or in Katsuki's case, translate for Natalie. Natalie proved to be a great conversationalist, even if only one person at the table could actually understand her. Izuku relaxed, fully. He had good food and good wine in his stomach, and was ready to call it a night when Katsuki caught his eye.
He gave a vague gesture to follow him, and stood up. Izuku stood up as well, inexplicably anxious. Inko looked up at him as he stood up, a furrow in her brow. Izuku smiled down at her and winked, covering his own nerves. She smiled, and squeezed his hand.
Katsuki led him upstairs, past what Izuku remembered to be the guest room, and into Katsuki's bedroom.
Izuku's jaw dropped.
Despite the room being wall to wall in posters, Izuku locked onto what he recognized as the limited edition American-era of All Might figurine collectibles. He looked at Katsuki, who smirked and nodded. Izuku approached the boxes lined against his desk in reverence.
“Wow...Is this...” his mouth was dry. “Is this what I think it is?”
“It sure is.” Katsuki replied, proud.
“Is this signed?” Izuku whispered. Am I going to pass out?
“It. Sure. Is.” Katsuki replied, smug.
Izuku glanced around at Katsuki in awe. “How did you even get that? They stopped making those before we were born.”
Katsuki threw himself down onto his bed, and rested his hands behind his head. “My parents knew a guy.”
“ Wow ,” Izuku repeated, turning around to gaze at it again.
Katsuki laughed. “Not that I don't love that you're impressed, but you were literally his apprentice. Why are you so amazed by this?”
“He doesn't do all that stuff anymore. Signings and promotions. He said that now that he's officially retired, he'd just be old news.”
Katsuki scoffed. “Never.”
“That's what I told him, but he said that I was only saying that because my room looked like, well.” Izuku gestured around them. “Said I was just trying to sneak some more signatures out of him for my own personal collection.”
Katsuki laughed. “Well, were you?”
“I mean, yeah, but he didn't have to call me on it.”
Katsuki laughed again, bright and happy. Izuku, without thinking, said, “You're laughing.”
Katsuki trailed off. Izuku hurried to explain. “It's not a bad thing, it's really nice, you have a really nice laugh. It's just...I've never heard it this much. You're happier, it seems.”
Katsuki sighed, and bent down to ruffle through a bag on the floor beside his nightstand. Izuku held his breath, and jumped when Katsuki tossed an orange bottle to him.
“Catch.”
Izuku caught it, knowing what it was before he read the label.
“Fluvoxamine.” Izuku read, and tossed the bottle back to Katsuki who stared at Izuku, calculating.
All casual, Izuku said, “I'm partial to Cymbalta myself.”
All casual, Katsuki asked, “How long have you been taking it?”
“Maybe five or so years now.”
Katsuki put the bottle on his nightstand and said a little faintly, “Sounds about right.”
The quiet between them felt too strong to parse through, and they took a moment listening to their parents laugh at something from downstairs.
Eventually, Izuku summoned his courage and asked, “Is that why you left Japan?”
Katsuki sighed. “It was Aizawa's idea, originally. You remember those stupid “professional development” meetings we had in our third year?”
Izuku nodded. He wouldn't have called them stupid, but he understood where Katsuki was coming from. The two of them were never going to be anything other than pro-heroes, (so help them God) and they didn't need to talk it through anymore than they already had.
“Aizawa basically told me I was destined to burn out if I kept on the track I was on. He was right, of course. And once I saw what he meant, I just… I needed to get out . Everything started reminding me of every fucked up thing that had happened to me—the kidnapping, Kamino, the war—“ Katsuki broke off, the smallest of explosions popping in his hands. Izuku waited him out, heart beating against his chest.
“I was having nightly panic attacks by the time we had our third year midterms,” Katsuki continued, wrangling his emotions. “I was spiraling, and I hated how the world looked at me. I was being way, way too reckless in training and patrols, and—I threw myself into it and didn't care about what I was doing to my body or my mind. Now I look back and I'm...horrified that I let myself get that bad. I'm ashamed that I let myself get that bad.”
Katsuki trailed off, lost in his thoughts. Izuku thought, it's now or never, and opened his mouth.
“It's funny,” he started, dragging a finger across a particularly thick scar wrapped around his palm. “Or not funny , but that kind of stuff only started happening to me after you left.”
Katsuki jerked his head up, stricken.
Izuku continued, hoping Katsuki would ignore the tremor in his voice. “I didn't know what to do with myself. You were there, and then you weren't, and. And I'd never had to live without you before. I didn't realize I'd been so dependent on, well, not your approval, but your attention. You were my point of comparison, until you weren't there. So I just worked and didn't stop."
Izuku blinked, clearing away the memories. "Then I woke up one morning and realized that it had been four years. We'd been out of UA for longer than we'd been in it, and I just. Let myself move on—finally.”
Katsuki didn't say anything. Then, voice small: “Move on from me?”
Izuku nodded with a shaky exhale.
Downstairs, Natalie said something and Mitsuki bellowed laughter.
Katsuki's breath hitched. He was looking in the direction of the wall, but he was staring right through it. There were tears in his eyes that hadn't quite gathered enough to fall yet. “I really fucked you up, didn't I?”
Izuku said, as gently as he could, “Yeah.”
Katsuki dropped his head into his hands and began to sob, shoulders shaking. He was quiet about it, and Izuku felt his heart break a little, wondering if this was how he cried in the UA dorms—everyone around him, but no one with him.
Lonely , crossed Izuku's mind.
Izuku sat down beside him, and put a hand on the nape of his neck. He left it there, not directing, just letting Katsuki know where he was if he needed him. In between gasps, Katskui kept whispering, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, and Izuku hushed him.
Katsuki calmed down eventually, his breathing evening out. He sat up, and Izuku let his hand fall away. Katsuki scrubbed at his face with the hem of his t-shirt, and they both giggled despite themselves when a line of snot linked Katsuki's nose to the fabric.
“Ah, geez, gross ,” Izuku complained, and leaned away, still giggling. Katsuki made a silly face, and blew his nose into his shirt, and Izuku scooted up the bed, laughing harder. “Ugh! Nasty.”
Katsuki lunged towards him, making it seem like he was going to grab Izuku's shirt to give it the same treatment. Izuku let out a squeal of fear and scrambled off the bed to the floor, still laughing.
“Okay, okay, I won't.” Katsuki retreated and smiled at him, almost bashful.
Katsuki stood up and peeled the shirt off, exchanging it for a blinding neon orange sweatshirt from his closet.
Curious, Izuku asked, “Where'd you get that monstrosity?”
Katsuki looked to see what he was wearing, then sat back down on the bed again. “This is merch from Natalie's university. She was in some crazy smart school society or something, I don't know, and they gave her this. She didn't want it, so she gave it to me.”
Izuku cocked an eyebrow, and couldn't resist asking, “You're wearing your girlfriend's hoodies?”
Katsuki grumbled, “It's not like that, honestly. She's been... good to me, good for me. She's taught me a lot about who I want to be as a person.”
“I like her. She reminds me of Kirishima.”
“Me too. Probably why I like her.”
They were quiet for another moment before Katsuki spoke again. “We turned out okay...right? With the cards we had?”
Izuku considered it.
“Yeah, I think we did, Kacchan.”
Katsuki shifted and mumbled something under his breath. Izuku looked up at him from the floor. "Huh?"
Katsuki slid off the bed to sit beside him. “Uh, you can. It's Katsuki. Please.”
Izuku, touched, replied, “In that case,” he held out a hand. “Hi. I'm Izuku Midoriya.”
“Nice to meet you Izuku. My name's Katsuki Bakugou.” Katsuki returned his grasp, firm, and it felt like a promise. Izuku smiled at the relief in his eyes.
They returned back to the dining room a few minutes later, once Katsuki felt like he could be reasonably sure no one knew he had been crying. Izuku caught the concerned look Natalie gave Katsuki and thought that maybe it was good he couldn't fool everyone.
Inko and Izuku stayed for another hour before they gathered their things and started the process of leaving. Inko, wine drunk, wobbled a little bit on her way out the door, doling out thank you's like it was her day job. Mitsuki was the same, practically hanging off of Masaru as he tried to corral her upstairs.
Katsuki saw to the door.
As Izuku pulled his shoes on, he asked Katsuki when his flight home was. Katsuki looked at Natalie, asked the question in English, and Natalie replied with a broad wave of her hand.
Katsuki turned back to Izuku. “We haven't booked a return flight home yet.”
Izuku chewed on his lip, forming an idea. “Tenya had mentioned trying to organize a ten-year class reunion. I know we still have a few months until the official anniversary, but is that something you might be interested in? If we threw one while you're still here?”
Katsuki hesitated. “That's short notice.”
Izuku tried a different angle. “Open bar?”
Katsuki barked a laugh. “I'll think about it.”
They said their final goodbyes as Izuku herded Inko to the street. He had to pat her down for the keys, and slid her into the passenger seat before he settled down behind the wheel.
As he was adjusting the seat so his knees didn't brush his chin, Inko murmured, “He's grown up to be a lovely man, hasn't he?”
Izuku looked back to the Bakugo's house where the lights cast a warm glow into the night. He thought about an orange pill bottle and an orange sweatshirt, and said, “Yeah, mom, he has.”