Chapter Text
Stiles sits cross-legged on his bed, the sheet wrapped loosely around his waist. He’s been awake an hour watching Derek sleep, excited for him to wake. Finally, Derek rolls onto his back, squints his eyes open and stretches his arms over his head in a huge yawn. Stiles lustfully gawks at Derek’s naked body. He shivers and squirms in his excitement. This finally gets Derek to look at him.
Stiles smiles and chirps, “Know what today is?”
Derek scowls and grumps, “Oh good, a riddle first thing in the morning.”
Stiles laughs, “Come on, you know.”
“I know I’ve barely opened my eyes and am now being expected to not only converse, but figure out some arcane trivia.” The scowl deepens.
Stiles again bounces on the bed in his excitement.
Derek suddenly reaches up and grabs Stiles and pulls him over on top of him. “Happy Anniversary, Stiles.” He smiles and kisses him deeply while grabbing his ass. He pulls his body tight against his.
“Happy Anniversary to you. A whole year! Can you believe it?”
Derek replies by taking Stiles into his mouth.
Later that morning at breakfast in Stiles’s miniscule apartment, Stiles is dressed for class and Derek wears only jeans. “Is everything still good for this weekend’s move?” Derek asks. Now that Stiles’s lease is up, they’re going to get an apartment together.
“Yeah, good. I finish my last test on Thursday and so can pack Friday and be ready to haul all to your place Saturday morning. Also, I’ve got the new mattress ordered.” He wiggles his eyebrows at Derek.
Derek laughs, “Can’t wait to break that in with you.”
Stiles involuntarily shudders his whole body at the thought.
“And is everything set for the party tonight?”
“Yep. Everyone’s said they’ll be there. I know it’s not really your thing, gatherings like this, but I’m really looking forward to it. And I think everyone coming wants to sincerely congratulate us; I don’t think any of them thought we’d actually become a couple.”
“Yeah, it’s kind of shocked me as well,” Derek replied. And he hastens to add when he sees Stiles’s stunned face, “but I couldn’t be happier that it did. I wasn’t really the relationship type when we met.”
“Understatement of the year, that was. I’m rather shocked myself sometimes. A hot guy like you coming home to me every night – I’m the luckiest guy in the world.” Derek grins, which always drives Stiles crazy with desire. “God, I love your smile.”
“I’m the lucky one.” Derek affectionately cups Stiles’s cheek. “I definitely got the better deal in all this. So who all is going to be there?”
“Scott and Allison, Lydia, Isaac, Ethan and Aiden, and Danny and some new boyfriend of his – I hope there’s no drama with Ethan and him. Just the core group.”
“Sounds good. Are we going together or meet there?”
“Well, since it’s our one year anniversary of being together, I think we should go together,” Stiles says, while stroking Derek’s scruffy face.
“Good point. I’ll come by for you at 6:30 which will give us plenty of time to be there by 7:00.”
“What have you got planned for today?”
“I’ve got some work to do at the house. Talk to Peter about some family financial stuff. Pack some belongings.” He smiles as he says this last one.
Stiles returns his grin.
Stiles notices a note on the table. “Oh here, this was on the door when I got home last night.” Derek’s name is printed in simple block letters on the front. With some trepidation, Derek takes the note.
“What’s wrong?” Stiles asks.
“I recognize the handwriting. It’s from my ex.”
“How did he know where to find you, I wonder. And, wait, you have another ex besides Kate? I’ve never heard you mention an ex. Of course it makes sense that you would have one. I wonder why I never thought to ask. I guess I always thought Kate was all the ex that you needed. It’s not from her, is it? Oh, of course not, she’s dead.”
Derek stares at the envelope, not seeming to hear what Stiles is saying. He nods absently. “Alcide. College romance.” His forehead furrows.
“Oh.” Stiles is stunned into uncharacteristic silence. He opens and closes his mouth several times. “Why’d you dump him?”
“I didn’t.” He picks the note up and opens it on his way out to the cramped balcony. He closes the door behind him and reads the note while leaning against the railing.
Stiles is late for class as it is but can’t leave after this bombshell. He thinks some sort of explanation is in order. He finishes packing up his backpack in preparation for leaving for class.
After Derek reads the note, he absentmindedly sits on one of the chairs, drops his arms holding the note between his legs, and stares blankly into the courtyard. After giving Derek a moment alone, Stiles knocks gently on the door and goes out to the balcony. Derek starts and then focuses on Stiles.
“So what’s going on?” he asks Derek.
“Alcide’s in town. Peter told him where to find me. He wants to see me.”
“Do you want to see him?”
“I don’t know what I want. I haven’t heard a word from him since our nasty breakup five years ago.”
“So what are you going to do?”
“I guess I could have dinner with him tonight.”
“Ahem, we do have some plans to celebrate our relationship tonight.”
“Oh man, sorry Stiles. I’m just a bit out of it. In a bit of shock, I suppose.”
“Do you want me to come with you to see him?”
“Oh, definitely not. No need for that. I can go it alone, if it comes to that.”
Stiles feels a bit defeated – he considered it kind of a test of their relationship if Derek’d be willing to take him. He hides his disappointment. He knows it would be uncomfortable for all.
“His name is Alcide? Interesting name. Foreign?”
“No, from Louisiana.”
“Why is he here?”
“Business trip.” Derek remains preoccupied.
Stiles gets up and stands behind Derek and puts his arms around him. He kisses the top of his head, then rests his chin there. “So what are you thinking?”
“I… I don’t even know.”
Stiles is nonplussed. He’s never seen Derek not be in control before. He’s not sure how to take it or what it means.
“So a little more information about him please.” He sits on the other chair beside Derek and holds his hand.
Derek finally raises his eyes to Stiles and smiles. “Met Freshman year. First real love. Dumped me at graduation. Was a shithead and broke my heart.”
“Ow. What does he look like?” As soon as he’s asked the question, he knows it’s the wrong one.
“Hmm? Oh, you know. College boy.”
“Big think glasses, pasty, pimply, greasy hair, geeky, skinny, poor dresser, clumsy?”
Derek smiles. “Something like that. And he got all hairy with the full moon.”
“Ahh, I see.”
Derek stands up, rubs Stiles’s short hair, and heads inside.
Stiles knocks over his chair getting up quickly and trips over it trying to catch Derek in the apartment as Derek is dressing.
“So is everything ok? Are you going to see him?”
“I don’t know. I’m fine. I need to get going. Got to find Peter. And you’re late for class again.”
“Derek, I don’t care about the stupid class. I’m worried about you. I haven’t seen you like this before and obviously it’s bothering you. I’m feeling a little weirded out myself.”
Derek hugs him and says, “Don’t be. Everything is fine. I’ll see you tonight.” And after a quick peck, leaves.
Stiles watches as Derek’s car pulls out of the parking lot and a tear falls as he has overwhelming feelings of dread. All his old insecurities come rushing back. He slowly closes the front door, locks it, and heads to class.
Stiles lunches with Allison, Lydia, and Scott. He’s told them about the note and Derek’s response to it.
Allison says, “That sucks that he was so shocked about it and didn’t talk to you about it, though I understand why he’d need some time to process it.”
Lydia agrees, “Yeah, just give him a little time. You are in a great place the two of you. Getting ready to move in together. He’s obviously crazy about you. Look how you’ve brought him out of his shell this year. No more scowling. No more terse three-word sentences. Actually fun to be around. You’ve done all of that for him. I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Probably just blindsided him.”
Scott adds, “Pretty weird reaction.”
“I agree Scott,” Stiles says. “He’s obviously got feelings there. I just feel all insecure. I don’t know what to do. What to ask him about. I’ve tried calling him several times today and it goes straight to voicemail. He always answers when I call.”
Allison replies, “You’re being paranoid. What about all the stuff Lydia mentioned? You and Derek are amazing together. I think he owes his life to you. You’ve brought him out of his angry, unsociable self. You’re an amazing person and I can’t imagine anyone better for Derek than you. And I’m sure he feels the same way. Blindsided is all.”
Scott puts his hand on Stiles’s shoulder.
“I know with my first great love, after we broke up, it was awkward. We needed time apart to heal and reevaluate things, and after that it took a bit to feel comfortable around each other again. To figure out how we felt. I’m sure that’s what Derek has to do now. He’s had the apart time and has to figure out the way he feels now. The one thing I know for certain is that he loves you,” Allison says.
“You know I’m sitting right here?” Scott pouts.
“Yes, and I’m relying on you to back me up. Do you agree?”
Scott considers a moment and nods.
Stiles wanly smiles, “I hope so.”
“I know so,” Lydia and Allison say in unison.
“Thanks guys, gotta get to class, though not sure what the point is. I’m not paying the least attention.”
“I know how that is,” Scott says.
“Keep your cell phones close in case the party plans change.”
“Oh, don’t be silly. It’ll be fine.” Lydia and Allison both hug him. Scott looks uncomfortably away.
“I know I’m late. Meet me out in front of your apartment in two minutes.”
Stiles is so relieved to hear from him but is incredibly pissed off at Derek’s not calling him back all day, despite repeated messages from Stiles to do so.
Sulkily, he locks the front door and goes down to the parking lot. Derek pulls up and Stiles gets in. He folds his arms across his chest and stares straight ahead.
“Come on, Stiles. I’m sorry. I’m late. I didn’t call you back. I’ve been a complete ass about this. Please …”
“Please what?”
“Please forgive me. I’ll tell you everything. Was just so freaked out today. I shifted and went for a long run for the first time in over a year. Needed to clear my head. I’m really sorry. I know it was unfair to you.”
Stiles sits up, uncrosses his arms and looks at Derek. “I know it must have been a weird day for you. I know it was for me. I’m sorry for being so sulky and selfish about it.”
“You have every right to be mad. I’m mad at myself.”
To answer, Stiles leans over and kisses Derek on the cheek. Derek relaxes and puts his arm around Stiles. They ride in silence for a bit. “So, did you see him?”
“No. He did come back to the house but I didn’t answer. Of course he knew I was there, but luckily didn’t push it and took off. I’m hoping he took the hint. I’ve decided that’s the past. You’re my future and I love my future. No reason to revisit the painful past.”
Stiles smiles broadly. “That’s the first time you’ve said that to me – that you love me. Well, almost said it. Generally you said it.”
Derek smiles sheepishly at him. “I, um, do, you know.” After a pause and deep breath, he repeats, “I love you, Stiles. And I am truly sorry for hurting you today by not being available.”
Stiles smiles and wiggles his ears, which always makes Derek laugh. “I love you too, Derek. And we’re good about today; sorry it was such a freaky day for you. Now let’s go celebrate!”
They arrive at the bar and give each other a deep kiss. “You look especially nice tonight, Stiles. Button-front shirts suit you.”
He grins. “I might say the same about you. As always, you look incredible.”
They enter the bar holding hands. Their friends all sit at a table and cheer wildly when they enter. Music is playing from the jukebox. Other patrons turn to see what the commotion is. When they see the ‘Happy Anniversary’ banner over the table, a few of the other patrons join in the applause.
Stiles is strutting and beaming and Derek smiles bigger than any of them can ever remember. They all hug hello with kisses and back-slaps. The expected group is all there. Drinks and food are ordered in abundance. General merrymaking ensues. Stiles steels glances at Derek from time to time and never sees any sign of his mind wandering. He seems to be having a great time visiting with everyone. He drinks heartily, as they all do, and laughs uproariously at the smallest joke.
After a few rounds of drinks and dinner, Allison announces a toast. “I am so happy for you two. Frankly, I was as surprised as everyone else when you got together last year.” All laugh. “Derek, you have given Stiles such confidence; and Stiles, you have given Derek joy. You’ve both given each other love. To the two of you!” Everyone cheers and clinks glasses before drinking them down.
Lydia presents her toast with a tilt of her head and a flick of her hair, “I always knew you’d end up together and as usual, I was right. Finally, you came to your senses. Congratulations.!” The group all toasts, but contradicts her assertion of predicting their coming together. She ignores them and sits pertly down with a smug smile.
Scott raises his glass and says, “I’m just so glad to see you’re happy, Bro. And Derek, you’ve become like another brother to me. I’m happy for you both.” More glass clinking and drinking.
An hour into the party, Stiles spots Derek returning from the restroom and sees a tall man walking toward him. Both Derek and the stranger stop. Derek’s smile quickly fades and the old familiar scowl appears as he leans back against the wall. The stranger, who Stiles sees only from behind, stops directly in front of Derek and talks to him. He attempts to give him a small hug. Derek does not respond, either to stop it or promote it. Stiles moves to where he can see the man in profile and stares transfixed at his masculine beauty. Tall, broad-shouldered, athletic build, aquiline nose, clear olive complexion, white teeth, high cheekbones, dark wavy hair framing his incredible face.
The group continues the party, but soon Scott, Lydia, and Allison see Stiles’s face and follow his gaze. They immediately intuit what has happened, just as Stiles has.
The stranger talks to Derek. Derek’s brow furrows and he scowls. He shakes his head and looks angry. Stiles can’t make out any of the conversation. He thinks he’d like to go over, but can’t imagine what he’d say or how he’d get there at this point.
Lydia moves to Stiles and puts her arm around him.
The other party-goers continue drinking, dancing, and having a good time.
Derek and the stranger continue their conversation. The stranger imploring and talking to Derek, frequently pointing outside. Derek responds with one or two word replies, always shaking his head no.
After several minutes, something in Derek seems to relent and he nods affirmatively. The stranger smiles, rubs Derek’s upper arm, and leaves without giving a look toward the party.
Derek looks over and sees Stiles and their friends staring at him. The pack immediately looks away as Stiles walks toward the approaching Derek.
“What’s going on?” Stiles asks.
“Obviously, that was Alcide. Peter told him I was here. He wants to talk.”
“Didn’t you just talk?”
“Well, yes, but the environment isn’t terribly conducive to having much of a conversation.”
“Yes, I’m sure our anniversary party was quite distracting for him. For you.”
“Stiles, I’m sorry. Listen, he just has some old papers I need to look at and sign from before and then that will be it. He leaves first thing in the morning so tonight’s the only time. I’m going to meet him at his hotel in a few minutes, sign the papers, and then I’ll be home. I’m sorry. OK?”
“No, it’s not OK. This is our party and our friends are here to celebrate with us and you’re ducking out? To meet your ex? No, it’s definitely not OK.”
Derek tries to takes Stiles’s hand, but Stiles pulls away. “I know the timing on this sucks, but the sooner I get this done, the sooner he’ll be gone and then we’ll continue on like we’ve planned.” He takes Stiles’s face in his hand and pulls him face to face with him. “Stiles, please trust me. This is the last thing that I wanted to have happen tonight and the last thing I want to do. I’d much rather stay here, but I’ve got to do this and get it over with. Please try to understand.”
“I don’t understand, but if it will get him away, and that’s what you want, then ok. God, I sound like a petulant kid.”
“You have every right to be pissed. I’ll make it up to you.” He leans in close and kisses Stiles’s ear. “Tonight when I get back.”
Scott makes retching noises in the background.
“I can’t believe I’m agreeing to this. Go on. Scott can drop me at home. Get it over with and come be with me. I’ll be waiting for you. Call me if you need anything and I expect to see you home within an hour. I still have to give you my gift.” He kisses Derek as he leaves.
“I thought you gave it to me this morning,” Derek says with a leer.
“It was the gift that keeps on giving. You’ll definitely get it again.”
Derek leaves the bar. Stiles hears his car roar to life and pull out of the parking lot.
He turns to the still-assembled friends and tells them the bare bones of the day’s events. He thanks them all for coming and for their support as the party disbands.
Scott and Allison drop Stiles off at the apartment. “Should we come up with you for a bit?” Allison asks.
“Oh, no. Thanks Allison. Derek will be home shortly and everything will be fine. Thanks for the ride.”
“Of course, call –“, the car door closes on the rest of the sentence. Stiles turns and faces the dark, empty apartment. He slowly climbs the rickety staircase and enters the cold apartment.
He paces the floor, half-heartedly packs a few things, looks at his watch every thirty seconds, and paces some more. After being home two hours, he finally gives in and dials Derek’s cell. No answer.
Damn it! What’s the problem? I don’t know whether to be worried or not. Has Alcide done something to him? Did he have a wreck? He said within the hour. Stiles continues pacing while the perseverative thoughts percolate through his mind. He finds himself near to hyperventilating and having a panic attack when he sits down and starts taking deep breaths, calming himself.
At three o’clock, he calls the Sheriff’s office. “Hey Deputy, this is Stiles. A friend of mine seems to be missing and it’s probably nothing, but I just wanted to see if there had been any accidents or incidents reported tonight?”
The deputy replies, “No, been quiet as can be all night. Do we need to go check on somebody?”
“No, no. Thanks though. Actually, I wouldn’t even know where to tell you to go and check. Probably just two old friends catching up. Thanks anyway.”
“Sure, if I hear of anything, I’ll let you know. And oh yeah, Happy Anniversary! I’m really excited for you guys.”
Stiles’s heart sinks a drop lower. “Thanks. Appreciate it. Talk to you later.”
He continues pacing awhile, then sits down on the sofa. The next thing he knows, he’s being awakened by the sound of keys in the front door. The sunlight streaming in through the window blinds him. He jumps up and goes to the door and jerks it open. “Oh my god, Derek, I was worried sick. Are you ok? Where were you?” He grabs Derek into a hug. “I was so worried.” He starts to gently cry.
Derek lightly holds him. “Shhh. I’m fine. I was afraid I’d waken you and didn’t want to mess up your school.”
Stiles rips himself away from Derek. “What?! You actually think I might have been in any state of mind to get a good night’s sleep and think about school? That’s the furthest thing from my mind. You said you’d be home hours ago. I’ve been sick here, thinking the worse – that you’d been in an accident or met some other ugly end.”
“Stiles, I’m sorry for keeping you worried. I’m a complete shit.” He enters the apartment and closes the door behind him. He takes Stiles firmly by the shoulders. “Now, I need you to listen to me. I’ve got to go.”
“Where are you going now? You just got home.”
“I know. I’m leaving for good. I’ve got to go.”
“What? You’re leaving? What happened? Has he threatened you or something? Why do you have to go?”
“I just do, Stiles. I’m sorry.” He stands up and starts picking up his clothes and stuffing them in a plastic bag.
Stiles follows him around imploring him. “What do you mean? I don’t understand.”
“I’ve just got to, Stiles. I can’t explain any better than that.”
“You’d better explain better than that. You have a commitment to me. We’re getting a place together. You’d better explain,” his voice rising.
Derek places the last of his clothes in the bag and packs up his toiletries. “I went this morning and paid for the apartment for a full year for you.”
“I don’t want or care about the stupid apartment without you there. The point was to be together in a place.”
“Stiles, I’ve got to go. I can’t explain it more. I’m sorry. Anything I’ve got here is yours now. I’ve also paid for the mattress that’s going to be delivered tomorrow. Everything should be taken care of for you.”
“Stop talking about the stupid apartment and shit and tell me what’s going on! Are you in some sort of trouble? I’ll call my dad. He’ll help us get it fixed, whatever it is?”
“No, Stiles. It’s nothing like that. There’s nothing to be done.”
“We can work it out, Derek, Why do you have to go?” He grabs Derek’s arm and tries to spin him around to face him.
Derek wrenches his arm free. “No, Stiles.” His voice is fierce, his eyes glow briefly. “Listen. I love you. I’ve got to go. Please don’t make it harder.”
Stiles sobs, tears streaming from his eyes, snot from his nose. Derek’s face remains stern.
“Why, Derek? Tell me.”
“I’ve got to go Stiles.” Derek pulls Stiles to him and quickly kisses and hugs him. He then picks up his bags and leaves. The door closes firmly behind him.
Stiles lets out a prolonged wail and falls back against the wall. He slowly slides down the wall until he’s sitting on the floor, alone, sobbing.