Work Text:
Jolyne wished that she was single.
Don't get her wrong- Jolyne loved her girlfriend more than anything in the world. Ermes made her incredibly happy and Jolyne wouldn’t trade their relationship for any sum of money. What they had was truly special.
But right in this moment, the fact that Jolyne had a girlfriend was the bane of her existence, and she was this close to swearing off love forever. True, she could never replace the Ermes-shaped hole in her heart if she did that, but Jolyne could manage.
After all, she reasoned that being single was infinitely less painful than sitting on the couch between your girlfriend and your mother as they bonded over embarrassing stories about you.
Her mother had been ecstatic to meet Ermes, and Jolyne had foolishly believed that she wouldn’t immediately try and humiliate her. She had been brought to her senses when they arrived at the small Florida house that Jolyne had grown up in and subsequently moved out of.
She had barely knocked before the door was flung open and her grinning mother filled the doorway.
“Hi, mom.” Jolyne managed to squeeze out pleasantries before being pulled into a bone-crushing hug, kisses being placed all over her face. “Ugh- Mom-”
“Hush, JoJo; I’m happy to see you.” Her mother pinched her cheeks roughly and Jolyne stuck out her tongue, but the attention was quickly removed from her when her mother noticed Ermes.
“Oh! You must be Ermes Costello!”
Ermes remained as cool as ever, but looking close, Jolyne could see the nerves that were being so carefully hidden. “Hello, Ms. Cujoh. It’s nice to meet you.”
Jolyne’s mother tisked, dismissing the greeting and pulling Ermes in as well. “None of that, call me Marisol or call me Mom.”
Ermes only hesitated for a moment, quickly becoming accustomed to Marisol’s weirdness, and hugged back just as strong. “Alright, Marisol!”
Jolyne bit back a smile while her mother pulled away from her girlfriend, looking thoroughly charmed. “Mhm, you’re just as wonderful as I thought you’d be. I assume you’re good to Jolyne?"
Marisol studied Ermes closely and Ermes quickly nodded. “Of course.”
“And she’s good to you?”
“Mom.” Jolyne hissed quietly and Ermes snorted. Marisol pushed her away.
“Yes, Jolyne is perfect.” Jolyne ignored the butterflies that sent into her stomach.
Marisol seemed satisfied and backed off, her welcoming smile immediately replaced with something more mischievous. “Please, come in! We have so much to talk about.”
That alone should have been Jolyne’s warning, but of course, she was blindsided by the sight of her mother and girlfriend getting along. Which led up to now.
“Oh, JoJo was always getting into trouble at school. Her father and I had to pick her up more times than we could count after she had gotten into fights.” Marisol had a photo album opened up on her lap, one that documented Jolyne’s school years, and Ermes was eagerly leaning over Jolyne to see what was inside.
“Please- How old was she??”
“Oh, no older than eight the first time.”
“Eight, oh my god-”
Jolyne glared, but her mother refused to even look at her, the same shit eating grin that Jolyne had inherited marking her face while Ermes cracked up beside her. Gritting her teeth, Jolyne crossed her arms, and prayed to whatever god cared to listen that this would end.
“I’d have to ask Jotaro where they ended up, but I swear I still have kindergarten photos of JoJo around somewhere.” Marisol hummed and Ermes sat up eagerly, but Jolyne had enough pride left to put her foot down.
“No, absolutely not.” Jolyne elbowed Ermes and fumed when that didn’t even remotely sway her away from the prospect of Jolyne’s immortalized childhood.
“No, babe, please- I need to see these.” Ermes practically begged, tugging on Jolyne’s arm, and Marisol giggled from the other end of the couch. “I need to know if toddler Jolyne is as adorable as adult Jolyne.”
Ignoring the way that comment made her ears burn bright red, Jolyne huffed, narrowing her eyes. “No way. I’d rather hold hands with Anasui.”
“No you wouldn’t,” Ermes hummed far too matter-of-factly. “Hun, if you don’t show me, I’ll just ask your dad.”
That made Marisol perk up, standing up from the couch. “Oh, I’ll call him now! Maybe he took them with him when he moved.”
Jolyne groaned, latching onto her mother’s legs. “Mom, nooo! If dad knew what’s good for him, he’d burn those photos and so would you!”
Ermes cackled from where she was still sitting and Marisol reached down to poke Jolyne’s nose. “Sweetheart, just be happy that I’m not offering to show your girlfriend your baby photos.”
Jolyne paled and Ermes shrieked with laughter. “Baby photos?!”