Work Text:
You shouldn’t want this.
Mattholomule was on his side in his bed. The covers were kicked back and he was cold but he didn’t bother pulling them up. It was the middle of the night and he wished Gus could be there.
That’s not how it works. You know sleepovers always just turn into petty squabbles, do you really think it would be different with Gus?
Mattholomule didn’t know what he thought. It was the middle of the night and he hated himself. Why had he turned against his friends in the graveyard? At least before he’d been able to hang out with them after school. Now it was alone in class and alone in his room after school and alone in his room at night.
Outside he could hear footsteps of people walking by and he let himself imagine one of those sets belonged to Gus, who couldn’t sleep, so he’d taken a walk and then maybe he’d see Mattholomule through the window and decide to drop in and—
Gus already has his own friends. He’s happy with them, you can see them all walking by in the halls laughing about the things they got up to outside of school.
—and then Mattholomule would invite him in and they’d sit on the edge of his bed. Then he could show him the models of human things he’d made for the HAS before they kicked him out. Gus would ooh and aah over them and compliment his work. Then they’d get tired and Mattholomule would turn out the lights—
And what? Is this some romance now where you fall asleep side by side? Do you want to roll over and throw an arm over him and sleep smelling him instead of the gutter outside? Are you in love with him? Is that it? Like he didn’t blush at Bria and scowl at you?
Mattholomule rolled onto his back. Then he and Gus would look up at the ceiling where the model birds he’d made at Glandus were hanging. He would make fun of the HAS chumps that had kicked them both out so Gus would feel better about that and then they’d talk about people they used to know. He could pull the blankets off his bed and they’d sleep there on the floor. In the morning, they’d walk to school together.
Yeah right.
“Yeah.” Mattholomule let out a long, heavy sigh. “Right.”