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It's two in the morning when Katsuki gets home. Throwing his jacket onto the floor, he proceeds to the bathroom and discards of all his clothing before he steps into the shower and lets the heat of the water work it's magic.
He's twenty, for god's sake, and yet his body aches like he's seventy-two, while his heart thumbs a heavy beat in his head. Rubbing his hands over his face, he's vaguely aware of the stinging cut on his cheekbone but that pain, too, fades into the dull ache of his body.
When he steps out of the bathroom, dressed in an old shirt and loose pants, he feels a little like his age.
And then he sees Deku, legs pulled up on the couch, face hidden in his knees, arms tightly gripping his thighs as if he can keep out all the monsters by curling in on himself.
Right. That's right. The last time he felt his age was before they got dragged into a war that was generations in the coming and yet, it somehow fell on their ass to fight it.
And Katsuki can deal with the aftermath. It's not easy but with every little thing he accomplishes, Katsuki finds pride in his work and new goals for the future.
Yet here Deku is, adding to his irrational guilt with every new thing they need to rebuild and keeping tally of all that's lost.
Again, they are like two fucking inverses.
"De-" Katsuki starts, stops, bites his tongue and combs a hand through his wet hair. No hero names, right. And he deflates.
"Izuku," he calls out, getting down on his knees in front of Deku.
Reaching out for Deku's hand, he isn't surprised when Deku falls into him, arms coming around his shoulders, face buried in his neck, a bony knee digging into his right thigh. He tries to hold himself up with one hand but gives it up and just lays back on the floor, allowing Deku to stretch out on top of him.
"You were right," Deku mumbles into his skin. He's slowly starting to shake, so Katsuki traces a hand down his spine and holds on to his hip.
"I'm always right," he says, pulling on Deku's hair because he can. "What's this about?"
Deku doesn't answer for a long time. His heartbeat is steadily picking up in speed and when he finally whispers, "let's go," it sounds like a horrible confession.
Deku flinches in his arms, burrowing deeper into Katsuki's embrace and Katsuki knows that the words took everything out of him, so he smooths his hand down Deku's neck and holds him where he is before Deku can think of bolting away.
"You know how my mother regularly bothers me. She insists we get over to France and visit her. Says she hasn't seen us in person in years. I don't think I can hold her off any longer." Then, pressing a kiss into Deku's hair, he mumbles, "I'm abducting you. You have no say in this."
At his words, Deku deflates into him, all tension gone from his body but the sudden wetness on his skin that's distinctively not from his hair, informs him that the situation isn't dealt with yet. So he gathers Deku close, holds him tight and uses the couch to drag himself to his feet.
Shit on it, he thinks, dragging his body through the apartment, Deku a heavy fucking weight in his arms as he gathers their wallets, phones and a few other things before he stuffs them all into a bag and makes his way towards the door.
It's almost four when they get to the airport, both dressed in sleepwear with only one handbag next to them.
Their flight leaves in three hours, so they wait and fight and wait again. By the time they finally board the flight, Katsuki has to drag Deku by the hand because apparently being one for all's successor means that he can't get a fucking break ever in his life.
When they finally find their seats, Deku fidgets, bites his nails, scratches on the deeper scars in his right arm and mutters shit Katsuki doesn't bother catching. Instead, Katsuki closes his eyes, one hand on Deku's leg to anchor him to his seat as he allows his own body to finally relax.
And when they take off, Deku stares out the window until the airport disappears from view. He turns to Katsuki and asks, "will they be alright?"
Katsuki exhales a deep breath before he reaches out for Deku. Burying his hand in Deku's hair, he pulls him closer until he can rest his head on Deku's. "Izuku, we never fought the war alone. Don't discredit all the other heroes to satisfy your own complexes. It's insulting."
"That's not what I mea-"
"It is." Katsuki cuts him off, digging his chin into Deku's scalp. "I should have abducted you ages ago," he whispers but he, more than anyone, knows that Deku needed to want it first before he could have made this move. "I took this choice from you, Izuku. So just listen to me. I'll take you back when I'm ready to leave."
It's an easy lie to spot and while he wouldn't have done it for anyone else, he thinks that maybe this will keep Deku's guilt a little at bay.
"Kacchan," Deku whispers when Katsuki's on the brink of sleep. "I can't breathe."
So, Katsuki gives up on sleep, pulls Deku into his arms until they are chest to chest and tells him to match Katsuki's inhale and exhale. And sometimes, when Deku's unease grows into fidgeting, Katsuki pulls on his green locks before Deku can start scratching his old scars until they bleed.
The flight is a nightmare. But Katsuki knows that once they land, he can keep Deku occupied enough for him to forget about their home country that's mostly been rebuilt and maybe, finally Deku will allow himself the healing he needs.
"Let's go," Katsuki echoes and pulls a blanket over Deku's sleeping form.
Let's go and heal.