Chapter Text
The antique phone-headed individual had his face down, head in his palm, on the verge of snapping, counting his blessing (or curses rather) contemplating whether or not he should end it all right here. This situation sounds like something you’d hear when someone has gone through a rough divorce with half of their shit gone and their children’s custody lost, or anything similar to such an extent that made them suicidal (which is exaggerated of course). Well, y’see… Jerry here, the black antique phone-headed individual donning a wheelchair, is experiencing something much worse. He’s experiencing what others may call Hell - or a nightmare come to life, but what is causes the mightiest of phones to shiver in their boots… in other words, Phonegingi is engaging in a conversation, and this conversation just so happened to involve the poor soul, Jerry. At the ripe hour of 8PM no less!
“....if you catch my drift,” The green reptilian fleshy phone-headed creature, Phonegingi, finished his prior sentence. Phonegingi is an odd fellow, to say the least, he’s covered in scars, stitches, 6 nipples across the torso, possessed a tail kin to a reptile, and a pair of grey sweatpants stained with Phone God knows what.
“Phonegingi, I am BEGGING you to just LEAVE, go to the depths of Hell or wherever you happen to dwell. Just don’t be HERE of all places.” Jerry clenched his fists, burning with frustration.
“NOT UNTIL EGG TIME, TICKET JERRIDSON.” The creature made noises that can only be described as ‘determined ape noises’.
“YOU’VE BEEN HERE FOR HOURS,” Jerry would pull his hair out if he had any in the first place. The sky was already stained with the colors of the sunset, it’s only a matter of time before Phonegingi leaves the province and never returns, right?
“Also, was ‘Jerridson’ meant to be the full name for ‘Jerry’?” The irritated phone replied to the reptilian from the other side of the glass.
“Why? Are you curious…?” The critter responded. He signaled his right shoulder forward, motioning the right side of his head in a dipping motion before bringing his body back to its resting position. Jerry softened his grip and stared at the green animal.
“Was… Was that meant to be a wink?” The annoyance lightened as he grew perplexed.
“You ARE aware we don’t have eyes, right? We can’t physically wink.”. ‘What the hell, was that meant to seduce me?’ Jerry held his head in his hand, totally exasperated.
“I mean, I might have some you don’t know about- y- you don’t know!” The creature crossed its arms in a retort with a tinge of sadness in his voice. If Jerry could feel his legs he would dropkick Phonegingi into the stratosphere. Phonegingi suddenly changed his mood and rested his elbow on top of the ticket booths counter, if he had facial features canny to a human before the worldwide dial-up he would be smugly smirking.
“You know, ticket Jerrickson, if you oh, so desire my farewell, you could just take me into the funfair with your 2 for 1 deal going about.” Before Jerry could scold the reptoid he paused to contemplate his proposal. While Jerry obviously wasn’t going to just let Phonegingi in the funfair all hunky-dory, he could pretend that he purposefully didn’t let him in, after all, another moment with this beast and he oughta go postal… The antique phone looked off to the side and sighed, exhausted.
“...Fiiiiine, I’ll let you in without pay. BUT, leave before the cops arrive if you don’t want to get arrested because I’m not losing my job over this.” The creature crustily jumped back.
“WAIT- REALLY?” Phonegingi then fixed his posture momentarily with hands on his hips. “I mean- AHEM, yes of course! No one can resist this phone-”
“JUST GET OUT OF MY FUCKING SIGHT.” Jerry’s prior attitude returned as the green-hued being yelped similarly to an ape and scuttled away into the depths of the greasy, oily Funfair.
Jerry let out a long sigh, he held his head in both of his hands. He needed a drink after this, his home life was risky enough he didn’t need another wrecking ball to destroy any bit of his sanity he may or may not have left. Without hesitation, he dialed 911, it wasn’t long until an operator answered his call. The call finished just as quick as it started.
‘Thirty minutes…’ Jerry repeated in his mind. Thirty minutes sounded like a ridiculously long time for the cops to arrive, while the crime was more common at night, it still pained him that he had to wait so long. At least Phonegingi isn’t around him anymore, thank Phone God. In fact, the operator could barely believe his description of Phonegingi, they thought it was a prank call. Instead of looking for a green fleshy phone ‘man’ with features uncanny to a reptile, they were looking for someone that’s dressed as a zombie during Valentine's Day of all days, he figured it was close enough, the cryptid fit in most of the checkboxes for a zombie anyway. A good portion of Jerry wishes that the lime green beast couldn’t make it out in time before the cops arrest his ass.
It wasn’t until he heard the grunting of the familiar greenish creature crawling in the dirt that Jerry realized that he has been zoning out for the last 25 minutes. Baffled, the inky antique phone headed hesitated to ask if the reptoid struggling to crawl with his upper body was okay.
‘...just pretend he’s not there, he’ll manage… probably.’ He thought to himself. It’s easy to pretend to believe a green reptilian-like creature with a fleshy stitched together phone for a head doesn’t exist when you can barely see them in the dark. Even so, there was still a twinge of guilt that weighed down on his heart, but his abhorrence towards the repulsive phone weighed heavier. But maybe, just maybe, he could grow to like him as a friend and learn that Phonegingi isn’t all that bad. Perhaps they could be buds, pals even!
Or… maybe more?
Jerry definitely needed a drink after this.