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“I watched your live,” Soobin said as soon as Yeonjun walked into his bedroom. The younger was in bed already, reading over his textbook, sheets pulled up over his chest. His hair was damp from the shower and his smile was sleep-soft. He looked rather adorable, and after dancing so much for the live, Yeonjun was excited to just cuddle his boyfriend and fall asleep.
“Oh yeah? Any favourites?” he asked, walking in completely and going to the closet. “I love all your dances, hyung,” Soobin called as Yeonjun plucked a pair of sweats and a hoodie from Soobin’s collection. He exited the closet with a sly grin. “I know, but which was your favourite?” he pressed.
Soobin rolled his eyes playfully, swatting at Yeonjun’s arm as he walked past his side of the bed to get the door. Yeonjun giggled and dodged. “Quit fishing for compliments, hyung,” Soobin scolded. Yeonjun laughed, blowing him a kiss. “You think about it while I shower,” he said, and then slipped down the hallway.
The shower helped relax him enough to notice not only his exhaustion but also his hunger. He needed to eat something. He washed his hair slowly, massaging his scalp as he let the tension seep out of his bones. He imagined it swirling down the drain with the soap and water. He did his best not to let his mind wander to work—it was a bad habit of his that he was learning to break.
Having Soobin in his life helped ground him. Having a boyfriend who worked a normal nine to five at the university library while studying psychology in the evenings gave Yeonjun the type of clarity that was lost to so many other idol friends he had. Being completely disconnected from the real world skewed him as a person, and he was forever grateful to Soobin for pulling him out of the darkness. It made his job more enjoyable too, when he had that escape, and oh good lord now he was waxing poetic about his boyfriend.
Gross.
He stepped out of the shower, towelled off, and got dressed. He applied some face cream to a few breakout spots, brushed his teeth, and then walked back to his room. Soobin hadn’t moved positions, but he had replaced his textbook with his phone and was typing with intense focus. Yeonjun furrowed his brow, crawling onto the mattress and over to the younger. “What’re you doing?” he asked.
Soobin didn’t look away from his phone as he answered, forehead still wrinkled in concentration. “I’m making a doctor’s appointment, my headaches still aren’t going away,” he murmured. Yeonjun frowned, automatically looking at Soobin’s head as if that would give him any answers. “You know,” he said, moving closer. “You should let me set up an appointment with my company doctor.”
Soobin paused his typing and glanced at Yeonjun. “I have a perfectly capable doctor, hyung,” he replied. Yeonjun bit his lip, lifting a hand to rest on the nape of the younger’s neck. “I know, but…maybe I could get you in with a neurologist and—.”
“I can’t afford a neurologist, hyung, I only have basic healthcare,” Soobin interrupted, going back to typing on his phone. Yeonjun felt that weird mixture of worry and awkwardness build in his stomach but he couldn’t stop the words that bubbled out of his lips. “Baby, you know that money doesn’t have to be an issue—.”
“Hyung!” Soobin exclaimed loudly, putting his phone down and looking Yeonjun directly in the eye. “Please don’t make me have this conversation with you again.” Yeonjun flinched, looking down and nodding, knowing Soobin was right. They had had the money fight too many times and had had too many close calls that Yeonjun should’ve known not to bring it up again.
He felt Soobin shift and then a large hand slid around his waist and pulled him against his side. Yeonjun looked at him, pressing his lips closed. Soobin gazed at him seriously for a moment, and then kissed Yeonjun’s cheek. “I know you mean well, but I don’t want you to worry,” he said. Yeonjun sighed, catching Soobin’s hand and holding it with both of his own. “I’m always going to worry, idiot,” he replied. “Just wish you’d let me.”
Soobin squeezed his hand, scooting down and resting his head on Yeonjun’s shoulder. “It’s probably nothing, hyung. If it ends up being something more then I’ll let you help, okay?” Yeonjun felt a jolt of fear at the thought of Soobin being that kind of sick, but he knew Soobin was most likely right. He gave him a gentle smile and tilted his head down enough to press a lingering kiss to Soobin’s lips.
“Okay, baby.”
Soobin smiled sweetly, and then picked his phone back up to finalise his doctor’s appointment. He stayed cuddled against Yeonjun and Yeonjun closed his eyes for a moment to slow his heart—he hadn’t even noticed how fast it was beating. He took a few deep breaths, focused on the warmth of his lover in his arms, and then opened his eyes again.
“Hey!” he cried out as soon as Soobin switched to instagram on his phone. “You never told me your favourite dance!” He pinched Soobin’s arm and the younger giggled, locking his phone and leaning his head back to look at Yeonjun. “I told you I don’t have a favourite. How could I even choose? They were all amazing,” he answered.
Yeonjun scoffed, playfully flicking his forehead, eliciting further giggles. “That’s such a copout baby, surely there was one you liked a little more than the others,” he teased. Soobin rolled his eyes, falling onto the pillows. Yeonjun took the opportunity to climb onto his lap and straddle his hips. “I guess I was particularly focused when you danced to ‘Still With You’,” the younger conceded.
Yeonjun narrowed his eyes, swatting Soobin’s chest. “You only chose that one because you’re a huge BTS fan!” he accused. Soobin laughed, grabbing Yeonjun’s hands to stop their assault on his chest. “You asked me what my favourite was, you can’t complain when I give you my answer!” he scolded. Yeonjun sneered at him, pulling back his hands and crossing his arms.
“You’re so annoying,” he pouted. Soobin smiled gleefully, resting his hands on Yeonjun’s hips. “Your fans think you’re so suave and cool, hyung, how would they react if they knew how easy you are to tease?” he pushed. Yeonjun gagged, sliding his hands up Soobin’s abdomen. “Did you think I was suave and cool when you met me, then?” he asked, quirking a brow.
Soobin smirked, pulling Yeonjun further up his body. “You mean when you were pre-debut and didn’t know your way around the university auditorium where you were getting dance lessons and got completely lost and needed the best campus guide to help you back to your hysterical team? Did I think you were suave and cool then?” Soobin giggled at Yeonjun’s deepening frown, sitting up so his face was inches away from the elder’s.
“I thought you were cute and adorable and honestly a little pitiful,” he finished. Yeonjun blushed, but didn’t have time to feel embarrassed because Soobin wrapped his arms completely around Yeonjun’s torso and brought their lips together. Yeonjun’s eyes fell shut as he kissed back immediately, tangling his fingers in Soobin’s hair. The kiss was intense, full of emotion, and Yeonjun let himself drown in it.
He was reminded again of how much he loved Soobin, how much he relied on him, how much of a better person he made him become. The critics always wondered why Yeonjun remained so true to himself as his success grew, wondered how he managed to stay humble and grateful, and Yeonjun attributed it to a lot of different things, but mostly Soobin.
He kept him afloat in a world that was constantly dragging him down with sharp hooks. He kissed Soobin harder and the younger fell back onto the pillows, meeting Yeonjun’s pace. Their hands slid over each other’s bodies, and Yeonjun felt his mind drifting away to that beautifully safe space he craved so much.
However, before it got too far, Yeonjun pulled away, heat curling in his stomach as Soobin whined in complaint. Yeonjun quickly pecked his lips a few more times to reassure him, and then made sure they locked eyes.
“How does your head feel?” he asked quietly, thumbs massaging Soobin’s temples. Soobin hummed, eyes closed. “Hurts a little, but not that bad,” he whispered. Yeonjun opened his mouth to protest going any further, but Soobin cut him off with a kiss. “I promise I’ll tell you if it gets too bad,” he assured.
Yeonjun hated that that even had to be a thing, but he also couldn’t deny his lover anything. So he nodded slowly, leaning to press their foreheads together. “I love you, so much,” he whispered. He heard Soobin swallow, his grip on Yeonjun’s body tightening. “I love you too, hyung.”