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Patches didn't understand how most things worked. She didn't know why her food magically appeared from a bag whenever it was time to eat and she didn't know why she wasn't allowed to bite off the sausage looking things attached to the paws of the humans. She did know one thing though, that her most favorite person in the whole wide world was her dad, Dream.
She had been brought from a shelter in this place called England to this other place called Florida. Again, Patches wasn't particularly sure what a 'place' was. How was she transported here? Did the humans have super strength that allowed them to hop from island to island to travel?
She didn't bother understanding though, as long as her dad was right by her side, she didn't have to worry about anything.
When she first arrived in his arms, the first thing he told her was, "I'm Dream, and your name is Patches, the Catphrodite goddess of love." He giggled. It was a nice sound, giggling. The humans did that a lot when they saw her, but her dad's laugh always resonated with her the best. He later on tells her that it was the '14th of February' which is why he was deeming her this title. Patches remembers looking at him dumbfounded. Unable to communicate though, she meows instead. She hopes he would explain what any of his words meant, what a February was, what a Catphrodite was, but he never does. Anyway, its was all fine. She soon forgets all her inquiries because she had been snuggling really nicely in his arms.
Patches didn't get much sleep in the car on the ride back home (the concept of the car really confused her, but thankfully her rabbit friend back in the England shelter explained to her what it was). She had grown up with various animals surrounding her all her life, so she was thinking about what the new shelter would be like. Patches had also hoped that the man whose arms she had been in would be the caretaker there, not just some driver.
But to her surprise there were a lot more humans than she anticipated, and like a lot. And there were zero animals too.
She arrived in the home, it was a medium rectangular room, and she had also been greeted by a light brown-haired burly man. Patches remembers noting how short he was as he exclaims in delight and scrunches her belly.
"Patches, this is my roommate and your Uncle Sapnap, Sapnap meet Patches," her dad had said. Patches remembers getting a look at her dad for the first time and notices that he had yellow hair. She wanted to see if they were french fries, so she jumps up from Sapnap's arms onto her dad's shoulder to chew them.
To her dismay, they weren't french fries. This momentarily made Patches sad, until her uncle and her dad started to laugh.
She immediately knew that she was going to like this new rectangular dwelling.
Still a little shaken by the sudden change in environment, she dozes off a few minutes later, the nice humming of the air conditioning bringing her to sleep. She dreams, dreams far and wide. Dreams of the super humans hopping across countries, zooming through the blue sky, popping clouds with their sausage paws. She dreams that she too could hop, and that she hopped right back to her England home, plopping into the arms of a brunet man. He had a posh accent, just like everyone else there, and he was holding her to his face, telling her that he was excited to bring home her sister. She dreams of her sister, the people there practically called them twins. Patches loved to play with her sister's paws, fondling them and stroking them and biting them, and her sister always liked it. They enjoyed each other's company.
But when the brunet man left, Patches' sister wasn't there anymore.
She awakens. Did that really happen, or was it just all a dream? She tries desperately to figure out what that just was, but her nimble cat memory fails her.
—————
Over the course of the next few days, Patches eavesdropped on conversations between her dad and her uncle. She was still a little shy, finding a comfortable spot in the corner of the couch to hide. It was a very effective hiding spot, she would bury her head in the nook of the cushions and no one would see her.
"Dude, what if they catch us."
"Sapnap, the school's not gonna catch us."
"You know the rules, housing of any pets are not allowed in the college dorms."
"Okay I know, but it's not gonna happen."
"What if it does."
"I don't know, but look at her. She's so cute. Her and her little socks. I’ll never give her up.”
Without looking, Patches senses her dad smile at her. The melodramatic silence gave it away, and she could feel her cat tingles get all warm and excited.
She finally gains the courage to peek out of her hiding spot and walk over to them. Her dad picks her up by the torso and strokes her back. Patches could feel her paws, spine, face, all parts of her body shoot in electrifying spikes of happy pheromones. He grabs a green braided bracelet from his drawer, tying it around her neck. Her dad liked that color a lot.
"The dorm police are never going to catch you okay? I promise you that," he says as he boops her on the head with his lips. Patches would later find out that that was a kiss, a symbol of love for the humans.
—————
To place more emphasis on this, Patches loved her dad a lot. She loved that he would tuck her into bed beside him at night with her favorite carrot-patterned blanket and she loved that she could put her paws on the crinkles in his face (trying to smooth them over was like a game to her). She tried her best to make him happy, so when she woke up one morning to her dad crying over the phone, she meows in anguish, trying to sympathize with whatever pain he must be feeling.
"What do you mean?" Her dad says. There was a pause as he tried to stifle loud cries. Patches became sadder. She tries to position her head on his shoulder, hoping that her face would make him smile, but it doesn't.
"You're seriously breaking up with me on the phone? Okay you know what fuck you for not even having the balls to say to my face that you cheated."
Her dad puts the phone down, tiny water droplets rolling down his face and gathering into a pool on the pillow. Patches could smell the tears, they smelled salty, so she curiously licks the ones currently on his face.
Her owner starts to giggle, "That tickles, Patches." She wasn't exactly sure what tickling was, but it made him smile, so she continued to lick his face.
"Okay, okay. You can stop now." But Patches doesn't. He wanted him to be happy, so if losing all her saliva to the pores of his cheeks would make him laugh, then she would do it for eternity.
Eventually, her dad had to call Sapnap in to pull her off. Patches was adamant at her craft, and even started licking her uncle's face to prove that she was committed to the grind. When Sapnap placed her down, she went into a licking craze. She started licking the carpet, the chair legs, the wall, everything! Her dad and her uncle couldn't stop laughing.
—————
The one thing that always fascinated Patches was this magical piece of paper on her dad's desk that could change colors and display different images. She would watch as bright hues of blues and greens littered the screen as they would shift and contort to how her dad wanted it to look like. It was connected to this object called a 'mouse' used to control it. It had a looooong black tail, and she always wondered if actual mice were actually used to make them. What property did those filthy little mice have to control the magic piece of paper?
Anyway, today she, her dad, and her uncle were watching the magic paper show them different places. She was sitting by her dad's left arm on his desk, all four paws tucked in her belly and gaze focused curiously on the screen. Her dad and her uncle also kept screaming at each other, and Patches wasn't sure why. They kept telling each other to look at the road signs, the license plates, even arguing about what trees would fit the vibe of which countries. Maybe they didn't like the photos being shown to them, though Patches had no problem with them at all. She loved watching the magic paper move and show them different cities, she honestly thought it was more interesting than the Marvel Cinematic Universe marathon she had to sit through with them (it was horrible, why was there so much fighting?).
Whenever a sunny place would appear, she would imagine herself there, sitting under the burning sun, taking in the air cutting through her face. She would see herself walking freely, paws making contact on the rough gravel, sitting under the shade of a tree while cleaning her whiskers. And whenever a cold place would show up, she would imagine herself face planting into the white softness, falling asleep to the cold harmony of the winter air, rolling around, fur getting stuck with bits and pieces of what the humans called snow.
But Patches wouldn't give up living with her dad and uncle for the world. She loved them too much. Also she got free food here.
"England!"
Patches hadn't realized that she had zoned out, but she panics the second she hears the word.
"Yeah Sap, but London right?"
"I think?"
"I swear if we lose our GeoGuessr streak."
Did they just say England? She starts meowing in delight, looking at her dad and then the magic paper. She was in awe. It looks just as she remembers, the red boxes with windows (she was told before back in the shelter that people use those to time travel), the wet road, and the people walking around in puffy coats. Whenever her caretaker would bring her on walks, Patches would always get the ick at how her paws would become soggy because of the muddy sidewalks. It was always raining there, and Patches kinda hated it. It was definitely pleasing that she was adopted by a home who lived near the equator, but oh how she wished she could visit her hometown just once more, even though it was cold.
"Hey look, a cat,” her dad says. Patches had stopped paying attention again, so she looks at the magic paper, finding herself eye to eye with a cat that almost looked like her. Her dad clicks the mouse to move to a different area, and Patches starts to meow without stop, wanting him to go back. It was odd, but she felt a weird connection to the cat.
"Patches, what's wrong?" Sapnap says.
"Meow, meow, meow," she says. Patches hopes they understand, just this once she needed them to understand her.
"I think she wants me to go back to the cat?"
Thank the meow god.
Her dad goes back to the previous area. She stands up, now filled with curiosity and her gaze focused intently on the feline. The cat looked very familiar, but Patches couldn't place a pin on why.
Her dad zooms out, and wait a second . There was a man walking out the door, a dark brunet, holding the cat by a leash. She remembers now. That's...that's the person who adopted her sister! That’s her sister!
By this point, Patches was on her tippy toes. Her nose was pressed to the screen, carefully analyzing the picture. The cat had her same white socks, white underbelly, and tortoiseshell coat; it was definitely her. Patches was ecstatic, she missed her sister so much.
She continuously starts to meow, paws grazing the screen. Her uncle found it funny, so he started taking a video. Soon enough she was going ballistic, rolling around the table, toppling everything over with her tail, and pointing at her sister with her arms. She was so close yet so far.
"Patches, what's happening to you?" Her dad, worried, picks her up and plops her on the ground. She retaliates and jumps back on the desk. He then proceeds to scroll to another area, but she looks back at him and hisses. She felt bad. Patches had never hissed at her dad before, but desperate times needed desperate measures.
"Woah, she's never done that, ever, Dream."
"She's never hissed at anyone, really."
"What does she want? Does she want a treat?" Sapnap reaches over the top of their refrigerator and hands her one. As much as she wanted to eat it, she refuses, looking again at the photo of her sister.
"She doesn't want it."
"That honestly really looks like Patches."
"Did Patches have a sibling when you got her?"
"I don't know, I can go ask my friend at the place I got her if she did."
Yes! Yes I did have a sibling.
—————
Patches was so glad that they were finally getting what she was meowing at.
It took a while for the shelter to reply. Meanwhile, whenever her dad would attempt to move the display of the magic paper she would scowl or meow or do something so that he wouldn't, and soon enough he understood that she didn't want him to change the screen.
"She's acting so weird."
"Maybe it is her sibling? That's pretty funny that we found her sister or brother on GeoGuessr."
"That's actually like a 1.75 trillion chance right there."
"Shut up, Dream."
When the shelter called back to confirm, her dad and uncle were so excited that they would potentially be meeting another Patches. After a few days, they were able to get into contact with the owner.
"Hi, I'm George."
"Hello, we're Dream and Sapnap."
Her dad and uncle then proceed to tell George the story of how they found out about her sister and how Patches went crazy after seeing that picture of his cat on Geoguessr. She couldn't really focus on their conversation though, she was just excited to see her again, until the George man told them that he was actually out of the city right now, and that his cat was staying with his grandma for the meantime.
Patches looks up at her dad with a sad gaze. He seems to understand her feelings because he lifts up his hand to rub circles on her forehead, comforting her sinking heart. George then informs them that he was actually moving to Florida soon for a year because of a job, and that he was bringing his cat.
Patches immediately jumps from her spot on her dad's laps and runs circles around the room. Running and running and running, imagining her sister chasing the end of her tail, like how they always would before.
When the call ended, Patches noticed that something smelled fishy. Initially though she thought that maybe the scent was coming from her, since she was heavenly excited about her sister's arrival soon. But it wasn't her, because she still smelled like carrot sticks and cinnamon. It was her dad that was giving off the weird happy sour sweaty smell.
"He was cute wasn't he?"
"Dream, why are you blushing?"
"He was really handsome."
And the day finally came, George arrived in their rectangular room home holding a small crate. She sniffed, sensing her sister in there, but there was something else overpowering the room, the scent of two sweaty individuals. She looks at George and her dad; they were making the fishy smell again. Why were they both so nervous?
Patches couldn't focus on that right now though because George puts the crate on the floor, opens it, and reveals a sleeping cat. Patches meows, and she wakes up.
"PATCHES?!"
"VATCHES!!!"
"It's you!"
"Vatches, I missed you so much."
Patches snuggles her face against hers, rubbing her whiskers on her cheek and soaking in the tingling feeling she was getting from Vatches' body. They both run around the carpet, excitedly smelling each other's butts and licking each other's ears. Their owners were all watching and laughing, phones out to record them.
"How was the country hopping?"
"Country hopping?"
"That's how the humans travel, they bring you on their noisy cold backpacks."
"That's called a plane, silly."
"A plane?"
"Don't you remember Bunny telling us about them?"
"No I don't."
"I was just on a flight."
"So, how was the flight?"
"It was great!"
"Is George nice?"
"Yeah, are your owners nice?"
"Yeah! By the way, what's that smell?"
"You can smell it too? I don't know, it's coming from the humans."
"Is it coming from George and Dream?"
"Yes, I don't know why."
"But look at the two of them, they won't stop giving each other looks."
That was true, every so often Patches would catch her dad looking at George with love-stricken eyes, maybe he found George attractive.
"Awww, they look exactly the same."
"What do you think they're talking about? They've been meowing at each other for the past five minutes." George says.
"They're probably talking about the sexual tension you've both got going on right now," Sapnap says, jokingly. Her dad and George both start to blush, and the nervous scent in the room amplifies.
Patches got to see Vatches more, which meant that George came along too. During these visits the fishy scent got stronger and stronger, and she would also notice George and her dad getting closer. She would catch them resting their heads on each other's shoulders, holding hands, nuzzling each other's faces, just as she and her sister would do. Patches wondered if her dad and George were long lost siblings as well.
Eventually, there was never a day that Patches didn't see her sister. She would wake up every morning, greeted by the shallow breaths of Vatches, and then sleep every night on her stomach, head getting lost in her belly fats. At the same time, George would always be with them cuddled up with Dream, body warmth of all four of them (mostly five because Sapnap always wanted to join in) cozied up under their warm blanket.
They'd soon move into a bigger place; their house had multiple rooms now! Patches and her sister settle in, peeing in corners and sniffing the crevices of their new abode.
"I'm so happy you found me, Patches."
"I'm really happy as well, Vatches."
—————
It was finally February the 14th! Every year on this day she and her humans would celebrate. Patches didn't know why, but they called it a birthday. Sapnap told her that she's turned ten today! For some reason, everyone was celebrating by decorating the whole house with white flowers, not with the usual red and pink hearts. A huge arch in their backyard was set-up, and later on a bunch of people came.
A lot of them started crying, but at the same time they were happy. How is it possible to be crying while happy? Patches wondered as she watched her papa (she started calling George that) walk down an aisle, arriving at the huge magnolia flower arch. Patches wanted to eat the petals, but she restrained herself since they all seemed so serious.
As night time came around, everyone started to dance. The heavy beats of the music resonated in her ears, and she soon found herself wanting to join in. Her old achy breaky body was too lazy to function though, so she decided to watch from the comfort of their house's windowsill instead, lying down next to a framed picture of Dream, Sapnap, and George she loved.
She sees her dad approach her, she was getting really groggy by this point.
"Hey Patches," her dad says. She purrs when she feels his presence.
"Meow."
He starts to get teary eyed, Patches could smell the salty tears coming. "You really are Catphrodite, the goddess of love. I was right. You're the reason why I found George."
Patches didn’t understand a lot of things, but she finally realized why her dad kept calling her that. If she hadn’t recognized her sister that day on the magic paper, her dad wouldn’t have found his soulmate.
Patches meows again and he laughs. She hated seeing him cry, so she reaches over to lick his tears away.
"Oh, oh yes. You love to do that, do you?"
Tears were tasty, and she might love licking them, but she loved her dad more.
"Go to sleep now, precious," her dad says, giving her a kiss on the forehead and stroking her with his sausage paws. “Remember this Patches, you will always be my first love.”
Her sister later joins her on the window, head perched on her spine. The bright lights of the night were no match against her heavy, sleepy eyelids.
The last thing she sees before she falls into a deep slumber is her dad, her papa, and her uncle in an embrace.
They say curiosity killed the cat, but in this case, curiosity found a cat love.
