Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Hajime groaned sleepily as he entered his office, mind on simply passing out again. But of course, his cell of trouble makers would never let him rest. His office wasn’t even that close to their cell, yet it was like the four could sense him being in the building.

“Haaajjimeeeeee~!” the four call out in unison from afar.

The bald man once again groans, before stalking towards the jail cell and glaring at the inmates inside it. He opens his mouth when he suddenly notices something's off. He looks at his prisoners up and down before speaking.

“Hey, 69, since when was your face girly, and why is everyone’s hair longer?”

Jyuugo glanced at his shoulders, noticing that his hair was feathering over his neck, 3 inches longer at best. Rock followed suit, blinking with minimal surprise as he realised his hair was resting on his collarbones. Nico just nods, as if he already knew , and Uno picks up his braid and turns it around, inspecting it, confused at the fact that it remained its same length–still impossibly long–unlike the rest.

Rock puts a hand under his chin, before his eyes meet Jyugo’s, “Oh hey! Jyugo, when’d you gain muscle?!”, He shoves his index finger at Jyugo’s chest.

Jyugo yelps and shoves rock off, “what?! and why does that fucking hurt?!”

“Oh hey!” Nico cheerily calls out, “Hajime! You look like a girl.”

Uno turns his attention from his hair and to the supervisor, barely stifling a chuckle under his hand. He ultimately fails, bursting out into laughter, clutching his stomach to steady himself. He looks back atHhajime and immediately breaks out into even louder laughter, bringing up a hand to point at the man.

Hajime growls and looks down at his body, causing him to shout random curse words at his discovery. He’s very uncomfortably made aware of the fact that he now has…tits?!

Seitarou seems to be summoned by the commotion and peaks his head in from a nearby wall. He seems to be…prettier…and more…girly. His hair quite a bit longer, and his face much much softer–which says a lot, since his face is pretty much the softest one you’ll see next to Nico. He yelps and falls down the moment he sees the supervisor and holds a hand up to his mouth as he lays on the floor on his side. Hastily, he gets up and makes his way to the cell.

“W-what’s going on here?!”

“I’d ask you the same!” Hajime growls.

Seitarou tilts his head before checking his body out, eyes wide as he takes in the way it looks now, “Why do we all look like women?!”

“FUCK IF I KNOW!”

Chapter Text

“So, basically, most of the prisoners and guards in building thirteen have been…transformed into women?”

Hajime nods, “the exceptions being Inmate 11, Inmate 24, Inmate 38, Inmate 60, Inmate 21, Inmate 40 And four guards.”

Momoko puts her chin on her joined knuckles, “Have you found any commonalities amongst these 10?”

“No ma’am, not all of them at least. It has come to my attention that all of the unaffected guards happen to be trans.”

“Alright, look into the files of the inmates unaffected, we will be researching as to why this is occurring. I expect you to give me a report on this by Thursday.” Momoko gives Hajime a stern look, scaring the hell out of him—her? They don’t know at this point to be honest.

Once Hajime leaves Momoko is left to mourn the loss of her handsome love—or is she?

Well...no. It seems the now ‘female’ Hajime has left Momoko to ponder—does she like women or is it just because it's Hajime?

‘Oh…even as a girl she’s still so strong, and assertive. This problem is giving my heart so much pain…This is the only time Mitsuru’s help is needed!’

As if he could hear the warden’s thoughts, Mitsuru almost appeared out of thin air—or, well the door, Momoko was too distracted to notice him walk in.

“Heeeeya miss warden~ Whats up?!”

Momoko eeps and almost jumps out of her seat. Once she composes herself, she glares at the imposing employee. Her eyes are narrowed and lips pursed.

Mitsuru chuckles “Miss wardeeeennn! Don’t glare at me like that! I'm shaking in my boots!”

“Mitsuru, what brings you here?” the warden questions.

“Ooohhh nothing~ I just wanted to stop by. The situation in building 13 must be troubling you~”

Momoko sighs and motions the man to sit down. Mitsuru re-adjusts his prescription sunglasses in shock before doing as she says. He sits down with his legs crossed on the spinny chair, propping his hands on the desk, inches away from Momoko. He winks jokingly before backing up a bit.

He eyes her with masked concern, “Whats up? You’d usually be at my throat ‘cuz of my teasing by now.”

“I’m surprised myself but…” she grumbles before composing herself, “you…you’re queer right?”

“Well yeah?” Mitsuru raises his eyebrows , “but I can’t help with any sexuality crisis or sumn.”
The warden furrows her eyebrows, “why not?”

“Look lady, I’m not gay, or bi, or whatever. I’m a-r-o a-c-e.Plus, I don't do sexuality crisis, I've known my whole life.” he shrugs.

She huffs, looking off, “can I at least talk about it?”

“Oh yeah I looove me some juicy gossip~”

Chapter Text

Uno sighed, tossing and turning on his futon, the hours flying by as he waited for the morning to come so he could go with Nico to the infirmary. The recent happenings in building 13 have been…extremely inconvenient for Uno. he was doing great y’know? passing super well, secretly getting period products and convincing others he was just some average cishet guy.

BUT, now that he’s the only one in the cell who hasn’t become a ‘girl’, it's kind of hard to hide it. It's not like he’s ashamed of being–wait no actually he is. Highschool bullying does that y'know? He just hopes the guys keep being idiots–as they usually are—and don’t realize.

But of course, the three–well four, Uno is apart of them and is mostly just as stupid after all—are only stupid when it’s inconvenient, so he’ll just have to cross his fingers and hope for the best.

He sighs and stares up at the ceiling. Wondering how his life got here–was he really gonna be outed because of some weird sex swap?

Well

Better get some rest.

And if the next morning the others noticed some heavy eyebags on the poor guy, he’ll just have to brush it off.

Chapter Text

Uno quickly makes his way to the clinic by Nico’s(and Seitarou’s ) side. Partly because of his mother hen tendencies and partly because of something he had to pick up from Kazari. He tried to stay by the bouncy boy’s side, but man, he was almost on the verge of bleeding through his pants, so he tried to rush Nico as much as he could.

They reached in record time, uno popping his head in as nico made his way in, only to be ushered in by Seitarou. He greets KAGU-8 when he walks by her.

“Okina?Where’s Kazari?”

The man looks up and raises an eyebrow, as if wondering what in the world the inmate would want with the woman. His eyes widen a little, not out of shock, just realization and he gestures towards a door

He opens it with a creak, which alerts Kazari. She turns around and sets the screwdriver in her hand down. Lifting her goggles she grabs a hefty box and slams it on the table away from whatever she was working on.

“Here kid, this is what you're here for right? The…” she trails off, encouraging him to finish the sentence.

“The…uhm…p-p..” he stuttered

She rolls her eyes “Just say it.”

“P-pads…”

“Yes pads, you need to learn to accept it Uno.” She says, dumping the brand he uses into his hands, “You're not gonna get anywhere while you shy away from it. Just because your a boy doesn’t mean you don't have to learn to not cringe about it. Now scurry along, I don't have time for your tomfoolery right now, I'm very busy.”

—---

The next morning Uno wakes up with a feeling of dread. He groans and lifts the comforter up and groans louder when he sees blood stains on the sheets. Instead of doing the logical thing of getting up and rushing to the cell-bathroom, he just threw the sheets over himself and curled up again. Though his body protested, and he clutched his arms around his abdomen as a sharp cramp struck pain through his body.

He turned around and tried to sleep on his stomach but to no avail. Giving up and pushing himself up from the mattress, Uno was quickly interrupted by a yell coming from his next-mattress neighbor, Jyuugo.

“WHY THE FUCK IS THERE A–” Uno quickly shut him up with a hand to his mouth.

“You’ll wake the other two up, what's wrong?”

Jyuugo waves to the mattress–his own, not the blond’s–and its sheets. They were noticeably the colour red, well not the entirety, just a small spot.

Uno, who was experienced, just sighed and guided Jyuugo to the bathroom.

—--

Everyone in cell 13 was reasonably confused when they saw Jyuugo bent over in pain throughout the day. When they approached him about it he simply said that Uno was saying he was going through something called a period. Jyuugo asked them if they knew what it was and they said they did, but when they were asked to explain it, they froze up.

“Didn’t Uno tell you?” Rock asks.

Jyuugo shakes his head and he calls Uno over.

Uno raises an eyebrow when they ask him to explain it, “It’s when someone born a girl bleeds from their uterus.”

“What’s a ‘uterus’”

“...It’s where a baby is grown in a woman?” He’s confused at how dumb they are but says nothing.

“Why do you know that?” Nico gasps, “Are you a dad?!”

“W…what?no, I just…have a younger sister. Also shouldn’t everyone know that?”

“YOU HAVE A LITTLE SISTER?!” they all yell in tandem.

Uno just sighs and waves them off, busying himself in the magazine he was reading earlier. He mumbles to himself about how bafflingly dumb they are before he starts oogling some girl on the page he was reading.

Jyuugo rubs his chin and pulls the other two closer, “I don’ think he has a little sister…”

“If he does, I feel sorry for her!” Nico giggles.

“Whaddya think she looks like?” Rock rocks back and forth with interest, “Is she blonde?or maybe she has pink hair!”

“Is she a perfect anime waifu?!”

Chapter Text

Kiji looked over his paperwork with such disinterest that he’d rather be putting the other guards into line, which itself is incredibly annoying. He yawned and folded his arms on the table, he leaned forward to take a quick nap when a loud voice from the speaker alerted him.

“yOOOOOOO, KIJI!”

He groaned and pressed the intercom on his desk. “What are you doing Mitsuru...”

“Weeeeeeellll, you see, I’m BORED.” He whined.

“Then do your job?”

A beat of silence is followed by a whisper, “I have gossip.”

Kiji raises an eyebrow, “go on...”

———

Mitsuba Kiji was a sophisticated man who did not theorise that his boss was having an identity crisis, and he was definitely not acquainted with such uncouth filth that told him that his boss was having an identity crisis.

He was a man who had dignity and didn’t bring cupcakes the colour of the bi flag to the guard’s room to tease his boss who would likely see it. No way.

So anyways, after he had finished all his paperwork and made his rounds in the prison halls, making sure every inmate was satisfied, he resigned himself to the guards room...to gauge the reaction of his colleagues.

He was a very caring man who needed to make sure that no matter what decision Warden Hyakushiki makes about herself, she would be supported. Kiji was what others might describe as an effeminate man. He really didn’t think so but it was whatever. It was somewhat a surprise that his colleagues didn’t know he was gay, for all the teasing they did. So he doesn’t know how they actually feel towards this kind of thing.

Throughout the rest of the day he rarely got up to check on his own building and when he did he would quickly come back. He spent the hours doing god knows what while he silently watched every co-worker that arrived.

He first eyed Hajime, who he knew would make the biggest difference to the Warden, and who he assumed was the reason for her crisis in the first place.

As expected, he(she?) didn’t even bat an eye and grabbed the pink vanilla one.

‘Booo, how basic’ Kiji thought to himself.

Hajime munched on the cupcake with such visceral anger that Kiji had to ask what happened, out of pure curiosity.

“Eh?....Nothing really, just some stupid inmates doing stupid shit. The usual. Why do you ask pheasant?”

Kiji rolled his eyes, “Sorry for asking how you’re doing, it’s not as if it’s common courtesy.”

Hajime grumbled something before turning to his paperwork.

The door then opened and Kiji immediately knew who it was. He groaned, he was here for a sort of social experiment not to hear these two fight like they have nothing else to do.

Samon marched in and grabbed a blue chocolate cupcake and slammed himself onto a couch, he looked at the cupcake for a bit, then the other cupcakes, before shrugging and taking a big bite.

There was exactly 0.2 seconds of peace when Samon spoke up.

“Hey!Hajime!The fucks going on with your building?!”

Hajime grunted out a response, “None of your business you damn monkey.”

“Say that to my face Gorilla!” Growled Samon.

“Eh?” Hajime looked up from their papers, “I am you stupid fucking monkey. Ya want me to fucking grab you by the collar and say it?!Maybe that’ll make it clearer!”

The monkey quickly lunges at them in anger only to be stopped by Hajime doing just what they promised.

Grabbing him by the collar they sneer as they pull him closer to their face to spit some words on it. What Hajime forgot was that they now had massive tits, and i hate to go all authors note on you guys but I seriously forgot to incorporate the sex swap plot better, like its there but anyways, here I am going as low as it could get for me.

Now, since Hajime had humongous bahonkadonkers and was so dumb to forget they existed (until bra sweat.) they didn’t realise that pulling the much shorter man against their body would equal said mommy milkers to make contact with the monkey's body.

That was until Samon squealed and forced himself out of their grip, face still portraying anger, but now it was flushed. He hissed and grabbed his stick to fight Hajime full on.

Well, he would end up doing so if it weren’t for the gloved hand that separated the two. Kiji stared at them with disdain before breaking out into a lecture.

‘Something something...the supervisors should get along...something something...you're probably gonna burden the warden’ or whatever.

After Kiji talked their ears off, the two slumped against their respective seats and shut the hell up. Good.

After a while, Hajime had left and in his place came the Inu. Kenshiro walked in silently and sat down. Despite his calm façade it was clear he was tired as he slowly leaned forward and secured a cupcake, thankful that it was not the last to avoid any problems or conflicts.

He grabbed a pink vanilla cupcake, a popular choice it seemed. Why were his coworkers so basic at times? Anyways, Kenshiro took a bite before realisation struck, he looked up at his colleagues with suspicion before asking a question.

“Who brought these?”

“That would be me.” Kiji smiled.

The two held some good ol’ ~prolonged eye contact~ before the dog looked away. Slipping into his thoughts in solitary. Kiji watched him for a moment before settling back and looking at the rest of his assignments, deciding he should head back for the day. He sighed and picked up a purple coffee cupcake for the short but not short trip and bid his co-workers farewell.

It seemed his little social experiment went decently okay, but no real results were unearthed. If he ever gets bored, he decides. He’ll discuss with Mitsuru other ways to see how they really feel about it.

’Oh well, another day, another slay.’ He thinks as he makes his way to his office.

Chapter Text

Yeaaaah i have no idea what to do with this and every outline i try to make sucks. If y'all have any ideas im willing to hear them out and possibly add them on to the story but it seems i cant even make a fic with rlly short chapters. Oops

Anyways this has been my longest story. Which. Slay ig. But i do wanna do more with this sooooo, ideas???