Work Text:
⸻✦⸻
The sky is so blue, so peaceful, not a single cloud to be seen. Its brilliance is almost dazzling. Looking at it is painful, for him whose heart is constantly shaded.
This part of the city is calm, as if nothing bad could happen. This serenity is a chimera in the Tower, which Viole has learned to appreciate by taming his tight heart.
Behind him, bursts of voices break the silence. Shouts, an argument. Then comes laughter. It's so alive.
He knows that this cannot last, that this is not the destiny he has heard so much about. That he doesn't belong here, not in this blue sky.
Like a clump of chrysanthemums that has been uprooted and replanted elsewhere, the leaves persist. This place is not hostile to him, but who knows if the flowers will bloom again one day.
⸻☀⸻
Wangnan is awakened by a sob. His body is filled with fear and cold sweat. He takes a deep breath to regain control of his breathing and then realizes that it was his own crying that woke him up.
Everything is fine. He is lying in bed in his new room. He has not closed his blinds, letting the glow of the night sky light up the room. His duvet is askew, half on the floor, and his pillow has been thrown off, as if he had struggled. He wipes his wet cheeks and eyelids with the back of his hands, then stands up. He needs some air.
The balcony of the living room is already occupied.
Despite the darkness, Viole is perfectly recognisable, with his long dark ponytail flowing down his back like a heavy rain. After a moment of hesitation, Wangnan joins him. Viole must have heard him, turning back now without saying anything would be rude, and he has no desire to be rude to a Slayer Candidate. He already considers himself lucky to have been spared.
Viole gives him a slight look as Wangnan leans against the railing next to him, then sinks back into his contemplation of the night.
"Thank you for paying for the flat," Wangnan tells him. His voice breaks the silence, seems too much. But staying silent next to Viole makes him nervous. "I didn't think you would stay."
Viole answers nothing, doesn't even look at him. But Wangnan perceives the pursing of his lips. Fearing that he has offended him, he adds awkwardly, "Not that I mind! On the contrary, it's reassuring to have you on our side. It's just that... you seemed so reluctant to choose teammates."
As is often the case when he addresses Viole, only silence answers him. Wangnan shrugs, and watches him out of the corner of his eye. Viole is still wearing his day clothes, trousers and a simple shirt. So he gives off something different than when he wore that long tunic in FUG colors. Thus, he seems to be nothing but a tormented young man. Thus, Wangnan could almost forget his menacing figure in the first test, and the corpses left in his wake.
Who is really Viole? What is his goal? Viole is with FUG, yet he did not kill Wangnan, even though he noticed his ring bearing the emblem of King Zahard.
Wangnan has seen Viole kill in cold blood, but right now the pale night light caresses the contours of his face, revealing his childlike curves. Gentle currents of Shinsu stir his hair, clearing his eyes. His gaze is not the one he would expect from an assassin. It is soft and sad.
Wangnan looks down at his own hands, intertwined on the railing. His, too, have been stained with blood.
"Aren't you sleepy?" he finally asks, curious.
He thinks he won't get an answer. He's not entirely wrong. Not quite right either. Viole shrugs, then turns to him, interrogating him with his eyes, returning his question.
"I had a nightmare," confided Wangnan, not sure why. "But I don't remember it. It's better this way. I can't afford to be afraid. I have to move on. There's no choice."
Underneath those dark locks, Viole's eyes shine with an understanding gleam.
⸻☀⸻
Another night, another forgotten nightmare, only a chilling dread left behind. Wangnan is not really surprised when he sees the figure on the balcony. This time he approaches it without apprehension.
Viole is in his pajamas, and his loose hair looks longer than ever, enveloping his body like the darkness inhabiting his heart.
"Another nightmare?" asks Viole. The question is only a faint whisper carried by the movements of the Shinsu. Yet, against all odds, Viole did initiate the conversation.
"It happens a lot," Wangnan replies in the same weak tone. "But I never remember it."
The city in front of them is so quiet, there is no one on the streets of this district at night. The lights in the public space are off, and only the five lighthouses remain in the sky, lighting up every night in the same way. Even though the sky here never changes, Viole always has his eyes on it.
"You, on the other hand, must not dream much." Viole turns to him with a questioning look, so he points out, "You always go to bed very late."
Viole is also among the first to get up. He must be exhausted, yet he never complains, his mood is always even. His silence was seen as confusing, even intimidating, but there is something reassuring about this consistency over the days. No surprise, one knows what to expect with Viole even though he remains so mysterious.
"I'm not dreaming," Viole confirms after a moment, before turning his attention back to the dark sky.
No dreams, yet he seems constantly haunted by a nightmare. Maybe they have things in common.
"And... do you ever get scared?"
Viole nods, almost imperceptibly. This admission of weakness makes him look so vulnerable. What could he be hiding from behind his long hair?
"Really?" Wangnan's voice gets a little louder. It's natural for him to speak loudly, to occupy space, to make a spectacle in order to distract from himself and continue to forget everything that haunts him. "You're so strong... What can you possibly be afraid of?"
"You are mistaken." Viole's hands tighten on the railing. "I’m weak. "
Wangnan doesn't know what to say. If Viole is weak, then what to think of himself, just good enough at surviving to see others die? Don't think about it. Must move on. They are alike in the end. Scared, with the feeling that their efforts are never enough. But even then, they refuse to give up.
There is something touching about Viole. Underneath his hair and his dark face, beyond his chilling reputation, Wangnan perceives his kindness, his determination. His loneliness too. There is something about this boy that attracts him, that makes him want to reach out, and hope to bring a smile to his lips.
"Who knew Slayer Candidate cooked so well? Seriously, you're a lifesaver when you take the flamethrower's turn. It's nice of you to help with the housework. You already pay the rent, you don't have to. We all owe you."
"... We're a team," Viole just answers softly, shyly.
Wangnan feels his chest warm up, forgetting the dread. A sincere smile stretches across his lips.
"... That's true. And as a leader, it’s my duty to look out for my comrades." Impulsively, he places a hand on Viole's shoulder, touching his hair. Viole doesn't back away. "You should really try to get some sleep, Viole. Let's brew ourselves some tea, and go to bed."
Viole nods, and follows him into the kitchen, forsaking the sky for a moment.
⸻☀⸻
More than a team, they were all beginning to form what looked like a family, caring for each other, arguing violently, then laughing heartily together the next moment. Viole was still often silent, but now sought their company. He was appreciated for his strength, of course. But also for his kindness, his reliability. He had become their precious friend.
So when he learned the reason why Viole had become a Slayer Candidate, Wangnan had been heartbroken. Because he understood how good Viole really was, and how much he suffered.
Viole fights for the well-being of his friends, who he is no longer allowed to see and who don't know he is alive. Viole has bloodstained hands and a taste of bile in his throat because he cares about his friends more than anything, more than he cares about himself.
That's why Viole is lying there in bed, unconscious and his body covered in bandages. Wangnan vividly remembers the skin torn from his back, his blood spilling onto the floor, staining his hands and his clothes as he held him close.
That night, Wangnan did not go to bed. He didn't even change his clothes, volunteering to watch over Viole during the night.
There's no question of letting him down. Not now that he's finally found stability, a place in their team that's comfortable enough for him to feel good. Viole deserves to be happy, and as a friend Wangnan will do everything he can to support him; including opposing FUG's decision.
Jinsung Ha had left without saying anything. He sincerely cares about Viole, so he probably won’t insist, but his threats are still floating in Wangnan’s mind. Even if Jinsung Ha agrees to let Viole continue his climb with them, the rest of FUG certainly won’t. Their team may be tight, but Wangnan is under no illusion. He knows they are no match for such an organization. He is determined to help Viole, but will he be able to support him when the time comes?
"Mr. Wangnan?"
Wangnan gasps. Viole has finally opened his eyes.
"Viole!" Wangnan jumps up from his chair and leans against the bed. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm fine." This is a lie. His voice is weak, and he doesn't have the energy to get up on his own. A worried crease has formed between his eyebrows. But there is no denying that his condition is improving. His wounds are healing quickly, and he is now awake.
Wangnan helps him to sit up, then goes to heat up some soup. He tells Viole that Arkraptor cooked it, so it's edible. Viole doesn't smile at this line of humor.
"Did we pass the test?" asks Viole, as Wangnan helps him to stand.
"Yeah. Thanks to you."
Viole sighs in relief, and his face relaxes. Wangnan guesses he was worried about his friends.
Gently, Wangnan raises a spoonful of soup towards him. Viole seems reluctant at first, about to protest, but finally opens his mouth without saying anything, accepting to be fed. Wangnan knows that this state of weakness is embarrassing, that it costs the other boy to be so dependent. So Wangnan talks. He talks about their team, tells him that everyone is fine, relates their latest bickering. Viole listens in silence, and when the bowl of soup is finished, he falls fast asleep again.
⸻☀⸻
The next day, Viole can get up. He is not completely cured and has to take it easy, but at least he is independent again. And in the evening, it is no surprise that Wangnan finds him on the balcony.
"How are your wounds?" he asks as he joins him.
In the distance, the Yeon family symbol glows pink, supported by a huge column floating in the sky. As always, Viole looks up at the sky, his dark hair moving gently around his face. He is here, on this balcony, but the look on his face indicates that his mind is elsewhere. He nods slightly in response.
"Is it because you think about your friends that you don't sleep at night?"
Viole turns to him, eyes wide and mouth in the shape of an 'o'. Once the surprise has passed, his gaze darkens, and Wangnan wonders if asking that question was a bad idea after all.
"Tell me, Mr. Wangnan... What reason could a person have to betray and hurt their friend?"
"Betray a friend?" Wangnan doesn't understand where this question comes from. The subject displeases him.
"Set them up and leave them for dead."
He wonders if Viole is referring to the past. It's too specific. That displeases Wangnan even more.
"I don't know. I would never do something like that.” The mere idea horrifies him. Friendship is the most precious but also the rarest thing this damned Tower has to offer.
"Even if it gets you what you want more than anything in the world?"
It is surprising that Viole insists. The number of words he has just lined up in one sentence is also unusual. The subject is really close to his heart, so Wangnan puts aside his revulsion and thinks about it more seriously.
"Viole, how could anyone appreciate what they have achieved with their hands stained with the blood of their friends? If I did something like that, I would hate myself for the rest of my life."
Viole bows his head, and his hair comes to hide his sheepish face. Wangnan's explanation does not answer the question that haunts him.
"... That's what I think too," Viole finally says. "But some people seem to be capable of it."
"Those kinds of people are not true friends. They only care about themselves and only pretend to be friends."
"So it was all fake?"
"I-"
Viole straightens his head. Wangnan perceived tears forming at the edges of his eyelids, and does not know what to say. The day before, he had seen Viole too weak to feed himself. Tonight, he witnesses another form of vulnerability. More than ever, Viole was far from the ruthless Candidate Slayer of the beginning. He was more like a lost child one would like to hold in their arms and wipe away his tears.
"I don't like sleeping alone in the dark," Viole admits. "It reminds me of that time. Back then, she was my only light. When did it all go wrong?"
Wangnan thinks that this girl Viole is talking about probably never considered him a friend. This kind of person only offers friendship when it is in their interest. But he doesn't tell him any of this. Viole seems to be suffering enough from the situation already, and Wangnan doesn't want to cause any more pain.
"I don't really like sleeping alone either. Maybe we should sleep together."
He says this with a laugh, hoping to lighten the mood a bit. He certainly doesn't expect Viole to look up at him with hopeful eyes.
When he goes to bed that night, it is not in his bed, and it is not alone. Viole lies on the edge of the mattress, trying to take up as little space as possible. Wangnan does the same. He is used to sharing his room, not his bed.
Viole falls asleep first. The night light redefines the contours of a face too young for what it has already endured. Despite his gentle features, his expression is still one of sadness. But at this moment, Viole is safe and his face is calm, his breathing regular. Then Wangnan falls asleep, slowly slipping into a nightmare-free sleep.
⸻☀⸻
It becomes a habit.
When the others are asleep, Wangnan and Viole meet on the balcony, exchange a few words, and then go to bed together in one of their rooms. As the nights go by, they become more comfortable with each other, taking up more space, their shoulders and legs sometimes touching without it bothering them anymore.
"You said you don't like to sleep alone. Is this girl you mentioned before someone you used to do this with?"
"No. She never stayed that long when she visited me," Viole said. Wangnan could easily imagine a small, annoyed pout on his face. "It was on the testing floor. There's a friend I used to sleep with sometimes, when we'd talk until late at night."
"Do you miss them?" asks Wangnan before he can hold his words.
Viole doesn't answer, but his silence is more evocative than words. He pulls the blanket up over his shoulders, as if to retain some semblance of a past warmth.
Wangnan moves a little closer, perhaps so the warmth of his own body will reach him. He lifts a few strands of dark hair from the mattress so as not to crush them, then plays with them, twisting them between his fingers. Viole watches him distractedly, a little off. As his hair slides through his fingers, the other boy's eyelids seem heavier. His face is relaxed, but there is no smile of well-being on his face either. If Viole could find his friends he misses so much, maybe he would finally be able to smile for real.
Viole falls asleep. His breathing becomes slower and more regular. His breath caresses Wangan’s shoulder and sounds like a lullaby. Wangnan falls asleep with the certainty that once again he will wake up serenely, without nightmares.
⸻☀⸻
When they sleep together, Viole always falls asleep first, as if Wangnan's presence alone makes him feel safe, forgetting his loneliness. Wangnan likes to fall asleep looking at Viole. He watches his chest rise slowly with each breath, reminding him that he is alive and well, right beside him. And when thoughts that he doesn't want to have make their way into his mind, he twists the long brown hair between his fingers to distract himself. As the nights go by, he notices that Viole brushes his hair more carefully before going to bed, as the knots are less frequent, its touch softer.
In the mornings, Wangnan wakes up alone. His heart beats at a steady pace,no longer overwhelmed by fear. Often the sheets next to him are still warm, and when he gets up, he is greeted in the kitchen by the smell of coffee and small croissants in the oven.
⸻☀⸻
Wangnan loves the Sweet and Sour team more than anything. Wherever they are, he feels at home. As long as they stay together, they will have a home. But despite his efforts to make him feel at home, Viole's eyes are always set on the sky. Viole has a place in their family. He is liked and seems to feel comfortable with them. But no one is mistaken.
Viole belongs somewhere else, even when he falls asleep in his arms.
⸻☀⸻
When the nights are cool, they fall asleep against each other. Viole has his head on his shoulder, and Wangnan has an arm around his body, gently caressing his head, their legs intertwined. When he looks at Viole in these moments, Wangnan feels the inside of his chest warm up. He feels a lot of tenderness towards Viole.
Viole belongs somewhere else. Wherever it is, he hopes they will find it, and that he will finally be happy.
And maybe Viole will then have a little place for him in his heart.
⸻☀⸻
One night, Wangnan wakes up. The sky is still dark and the sheets beside him are still warm, but Viole is not there. His heart beats fast, fear running through his veins. It's not because of a nightmare. A premonition. Maybe this night was the last one.
⸻☀⸻
Viole has disappeared. So did Horyang before him. They have disappeared, leaving behind only the debris of a gigantic ancient statue, a huge cloud of dust, and a young man.
A young man who is not Viole lies unconscious in Wangnan’s bed. His blue hair is so light and short compared to the hair that cascaded over his sheets. Unconscious, Wangnan waits for his eyelids to lift, and hopes to find answers there.
⸻☀⸻
He has blue eyes. He is not a Slayer candidate, but there is no trace of innocence in his eyes, nor resignation. Sometimes a little hesitation, but when his mind is made up, he sees nothing but the goal and the path that will lead him to achieve it. He is both reassuring and frightening. Resolute, ruthless, unwilling to compromise.
Wangnan understands. He also has his answers.
He now knows where Viole's true home is. And he understands that he won't have a place beside him.
But now more than ever, Wangnan would like to see him smile.
One day, they will all meet again under a bigger sky.