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Bat On The Loose

Summary:

Edward Teach is a modern-day vampire who moves into a new apartment. He never planned on falling for a human, until he met his charming neighbour, Stede.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Chapter 1: Minifridges Aren't Heavier Than Normal Fridges

Chapter Text

The full moon loomed in the dark sky above. Only a few night owls have ventured this far into the night. With everyone else asleep, it allowed for the few cars that roamed the streets to be heard in the distance, in the silence that surrounded him. The pitter patter of the rain created a beautiful ambience, perfect for reading on your balcony. 

 

The building's parking lot has been dead since midnight, so the car that pulled in around 4 am raised some suspicion. Stede sat up from his seat, peering down into the parking lot. He watched a small blur, who he assumed was a man by the mannerism and his manly grunts. From the 15th floor, that could have been a racoon and he wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. It was just a big grey blob. 

 

Stede watched the blob grab something out of his car. 

 

Is that a fridge?

Oh it’s a mini fridge

 

Invested, he got up from his chair and leaned against the railing of his balcony. Not caring about the light rain, almost enjoying it on his warm skin. His legs crossed at the ankles, with his elbow on the railing and his head leaning against his hands. The blonde’s eyebrows crinkled together. 

 

A minifridge isn’t as heavy as a fridge but it still is heavy. 

 

“Hm, must be a strong fellow if he can carry all that on his own.”

 

The man disappeared into the building, presumably to bring the minifridge into his room.

 

Steded shrugged, dried his hands on his pants and returned to his book. He heard the new tenant as he did his trips to and from his car. Every now and then he tossed him a glance, not really paying too much attention to him anymore as the plot of his book thickens. Reality fades away and he slowly becomes enthralled in the pirate’s life that he’s living vicariously in. 

 

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

 

The gentleman was hastily ripped from his false reality, tossing his book into the air. His heart was racing in his chest. The rapid beat pounding in his ears. His hands are still half in the air when another set of loud knocks ring out.

 

  KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

 

This time, the knocks sounded more like loud bangs. Almost like if Stede didn’t open the door, whatever is on the other side would

 

A shaky breath escaped Stede’s lips while his eyes stare at the door. His mind ran wild at the possibilities of what could be on the other side. 

It took a minute for him to get the courage to pull himself off of his chair and into his apartment. It was almost as if his legs were beyond his control. Pulling him towards the door, raising him up on his tippy toes in order to peer through the peephole. Though, whoever is on the other side must be doing something to it cause when he looks through it he only sees darkness. Hands fumbling with fear as he tries to open the door. 

 

When the click of the last lock opens up, Stede braces himself for the worst.

 

The door opened and Stede almost squeezed his eyes shut, prepared to embrace death when-

 

Oh, it’s just a man…. Huh

 

He was a tad taller than him, with long thick black hair that spilled down and mixed with his almost as long beard. It normally would look stunning, with all of its volume and length. Though, as of this moment, it made him look more like a wet cat. Sticking to his face and dripping onto the carpet of the hallway.


“Oh my- did the rain pick up?” Stede blurted the first thing that came to mind.

 

The man’s soaked mustache waved a bit when he spoke. Normally lush and dry, now in its wet state, it flops onto his lips. Sputtering as he speaks

“Yeah it’s fucking pouring outside” He grunts.

 

Stede began rambling, “That’s terrible I suppose they predicted it in the weather forecast but you-”

 

“Listen mate, I’m only here cause the landlord said he gave you the key to my place” The wet stranger stated eagerly. 

 

The blonde paused for a moment, “Oh, I’m sorry but I didn’t receive any key. Unfortunately this landlord is not the most reliable one of the bunch. Do you have any way of contacting him?”

 

No, ” He groaned. “She said she doesn't wanna be pestered past 11, that’s why she said she’d give the key to you since I told her I’d be here late.”

 

“Why are you here so late?”

 

“Now that’s none of your bloody business.”

 

Stede blinked, taken aback by the abrasive tone in his voice. “My apologies… Well, do you have a place to stay the night?”

 

The new guy looked away, trying to think. “I’ll figure it out…” he rolled his eyes. He turned away- but before he could even take the first step towards the elevator, Stede blurted out-

 

“You could stay here if you want!”

 

His head whipped around. Big, dark eyes practically staring into Stede’s soul. For a moment he could swear they were red- blood red. Then it was gone, replaced with the dark endless void of his big eyes. 

 

What? ” His voice was sharp, disbelief danced over his words.

 

What am I doing? I don’t even know this guy… 

 

“If you need a place to stay- I have some extra space” Stede squeaked out.

 

He stared at the blonde, unsure if he was being genuine or not. Maybe he was fucking with him. 

 

He shakes his head, “No, I don’t wanna be a bother.”

 

“Oh! No bother at all! I’d love some company. Plus I’d get to know my new neighbor” Stede tried to lighten the mood with his tone. 

 

Dark eyes stared at Stede for a long moment, eyeing him up and down. “Okay” he said stiffly. 

 

Stede, being the gentleman that he is, he stepped aside and allowed the new neighbor inside. 

 

Oh for fucks sakes I don’t even know his name.

Once he was completely inside, Stede closed the door behind him. “I’m Stede by the way” he introduced himself. 

 

“Edward” said, eyes darting around the apartment, scanning it for something

 

“Well, Edward it is a pleasure meeting you” Stede extended his hand out for 

 

Edward stared at the blonde’s pale hand, studying his soft looking skin. Slowly he raised his hand up and grabbed him with a firm grip. They shook, and broke apart.

 

“Nice place you’ve got here. A lot nicer than most people make their flats” His eyes darted from the antique table to the delicate looking chaise, like one of the ones you’re not actually supposed to sit on. 

 

Stede smiled at his hard work, “Well I brought a lot of it from my old house. I think it makes the place more lively.” He had turned to look at what Ed was looking at, followed by a little spin to return to facing his guest. 

 

Ed swept his fingers over the back of the couch. The fabric is soft and plush under his fingers. 

 

“That is made out of an exquisite Vicuña Wool, or the 'fiber of God'. I won’t reveal the cost but it was worth it” Stede supplied.

 

In response Ed just hummed.

 

“Are you interested in a drink? I’ve got all kinds of teas, coffees, whatever you fancy” 

 

“Tea would be lovely,” Ed nods.

 

Stede shuffles over towards the kitchen and gets his kettle going. Once the kettle is on, he takes his box of fancy teas and places them on the table in front of Edward. “Pick whichever you’d like” Stede flashes a warm smile. 

 

Edward’s eyes light up at the arrangement of teas. “Woah” he whispers under his breath. Slowly he carefully opens the antique looking wooden box, with dark engravings decorating the sides. They feel smooth to the touch. He opens it up and lets his fingers drag along the tops of the baggies, feeling them slip beneath his touch and make room for new ones. For the first time, his lips changed from the half scowl he was wearing. Now the corners of his lips tugged upwards when the sweet scent of the teas floated up to greet him.

 

After examining the variety of water flavours, he chose a black tea.

 

Maybe this’ll help the damn aches in my stomach. I really need to drink…

 

Ed wiped the thought from his head, instead he focused on Stede- who was pretty cute now that he was looking at him. 

 

“Ah, black tea! One of my personal favourites. Though I think this evening I’ll be going with a Magnolia tea. Hopefully it will help with my sleep” Stede says the last part more for himself.

 

That catches Ed’s attention, “Got trouble sleeping, mate?”

 

Stede realizes he’s oversharing already . “Ah- yeah . I have a bit of insomnia. So sleeping is not as easy as it should be” he sighs.

 

Ed’s lips curl a bit more, “Well isn’t that perfect? I don’t usually sleep at night either. I work the late shift at my work so I’m always up.”

 

“Where do you work?”

 

“I do uh- uhhhh code websites.”

 

“And they have you working at night ?”


“Nah I choose to work at night”

 

“Huh” Stede shrugs.

 

None of my business.

The tea kettle’s blaring screech stopped any conversation they were going to continue. Stede jumped at the sound, letting out a small yelp. Which made his cheeks grow red, he didn’t want to seem so skittish around someone tough like Ed. He hurried over to the stove and removed the kettle. He poured their teas and looked out to the balcony where he had an extra chair stored in the corner. 

 

“Care to take your drink outside?” Stede inquired.

 

Though when he looked back at Edward, he had his head down. Fingers threaded through his long hair. With his foot tapping rapidly against the hardwood.

 

“Are you alright?”

 

When the kettle began its screeching fest. The sound cut through Ed’s head- amplifying and ringing in his ears. His hands grabbed at the edges of his hair and pulled them, as if the extra pain would help. His foot started tapping out of habit and his head tilted down with each heavy breath he took. He had to calm down.

 

Stede is taking the kettle off- it’ll be over soon. Dammit eyes change back!

His inner voice growled at his eyes that began to glow red.

 

When Stede spoke again, his voice had a softness to it, as well as concern. “Edward, are you okay?”

 

Something about the way he called his name struck a cord inside Ed. His mind focused on it. So when he snapped his head to look at Stede. His eyes had grown wide, but they were normal and brown

 

Realizing what he just did, he straightened up and cleared his throat. “Sorry, just- been having a headache and the kettle didn’t help” 

 

Stede looked so guilty, “Oh I’m sorry I wasn't aware!”

 

Ed waved him off, “I get  ‘em all the time. Don’t feel bad on my account” 

 

“Alrighty…”

 

They quietly got set up on the balcony. Stede pulled out a small fold out table so they could let their drinks cool off. Ed relaxed into the chair, his shoulders loosening up a bit as his eyes lazily drifted over the view. With tall apartment buildings, not many lights were still on. Some rainbow LED lights glowed from the apartments of young adults, some flashing lights from the businesses still open. But mainly it was just them two and the stars.

 

“S’a nice view,” Ed nods.

 

“Indeed it is,” Stede agrees. 

 

Ed looks over and sees the balconies that are on either side of Stede’s.  “Who's is that?” he nods to the other balcony. 

 

“That belongs to my neighbors Frenchie and Wee John, they’re nice fellows” 

 

“And that one?” he nods to the one behind him.

 

Stede’s smile brightened, “Well I reckon that one is yours.”

 

Ed’s eyes widened. “Shit, I get one too?!” he sounded like a kid on christmas. 

 

He got up from his chair and leaned over the edge of the balcony. He eyed the distance between the two. “I’d say it’s about a foot or so away.”

 

“Yes, you can- What are you doing?!” Stede exclaimed while he watched Ed begin to climb the railing. 

 

He hoisted one leg up and pulled himself to stand on top of the railing. Without faltering, he turns back to look at Stede. A wild smile plastered on his lips, “I’m going to see my balcony.” When he turned back around, he took a leap and gracefully landed on the floor of his balcony. 

 

He spun around and did a little bow, prompting Stede to applaud his performance. He shot the blonde a wink. “How was that?”

 

“You could have died!” Stede said through an impressed laugh.

 

“Ah but I didn’t!” Ed smiled, which Stede found himself oddly drawn to. 

 

Edward stepped towards the door and reached down, hesitantly he grabbed onto the handle of the balcony door. To both of their surprises, the door slid open!

 

“It’s not locked!” Ed exclaimed. 

 

Stede beamed back at him, proud and excited. 

 

Edward pokes his head in and looks around. “Oo this place is nice” he says as he steps inside. 

 

Stede’s expression falters a bit when Ed disappears. “Edward?” he calls out when he’s been gone for a minute. 

 

Ed poked his head back out, “C’mon over I can give you a tour of the place!” He disappeared again. 

 

The blonde stands up, dusts off his blue pajama pants, then steps up to the railing. He cranes his head over the edge, automatically pulling it back when he sees the distance he would fall if he performed the same jump as Ed.

 

“uh-Edward?” Stede called out, voice wavering.

 

There was some shuffling and a small bang, followed by a SHIT. Then Ed stuck his head out again, “Doing alright, mate?”

 

“I don’t think I can do the jump” He cringed slightly. 

 

“Ah of course you can”

 

“No… No I don’t think I can” Stede’s voice quivers.

 

Ed studied his expression, noticed the way his voice shook and his eyes darted around. “I got it- meet me in the hallway” he quickly explained before slipping back into the darkness of his apartment.

 

Stede’s eyes followed him, then waited a moment to process the words he had just been told.



Uh okay I guess I’ll make my way out there .

 

He unlocks his door and steps into the hallway. The yellow lights that hang overhead create this timeless look in the hallway. That way whenever one steps into the hall, it always looks the same. Day and night. An endless yellow glow. Sometimes they give Stede the same feeling as the halls did in The Shining -

 

“Oh hello” Ed smirked, leaning against the door frame of his apartment.

 

Stede was surprised to see him- even though Ed told him to meet him there. 

 

Ohhh he unlocked it from the inside .

 

“Fancy seeing you here” Stede played along.

 

“Would you like a tour of my new flat?” Ed asked with raised eyebrows. Excitement danced on his words.

 

“Why yes I would.”

 

“Wonderful!”

 

Ed stepped aside and allowed Stede to enter. 

 

The place was basically the same layout as his own, except it was completely empty. 

 

First he led him over towards the kitchen, “Here’s the kitchen, as you can see. I’m thinking of adding some pots, pans, maybe a spoon.”

 

“What, no fork?” Stede inquired with furrowed eyebrows. 

 

Ed sighed in fake annoyance, “Maybe one fork.”

 

Stede giggled, enjoying the little bit they had going on.

 

“Anyway, if you will” Ed gestured for Stede to follow him into the main open area of the apartment. 

 

Stede nodded and gladly followed him. Ed waltzed into the middle of the room and did a sassy little spin. “This is the, living room . Here we will uh- live ” Then there was a moment where his eyes scanned the room. He went over to the biggest open wall, “Okay picture this, over here, the couch. And over here-” He pointed at the opposite wall, “-Is the TV. A real big bugger, some HD shit, ya know?”

 

“Yes, I do know” Stede replied, then added, “Maybe over here a nice coffee table?” He stepped into a spot in the middle of the room.

 

Ed nods. “Oo yeah that’s good, I like that. OH! Maybe behind the couch, there can be a nice painting. Something old and gothic ” he plans enthusiastically. 

 

“Perhaps, what colour scheme are you going for?”

“Dark greys, blacks, reds” Ed shrugged.

 

“Interesting” Stede examined the room again. “In that case, you need another lamp over in the corner. With that colour palette, you’ll need as much light as one can get.”

 

Ed smiled at Stede, newly neighbored, “I like the way you think.”