Chapter Text
A lot of the students from Harry’s year returned after the war; they wanted to finish their education and now that everything was semi-normal again, they actually could. Two years later than they should have- because rebuilding the castle had taken a full year- but still now they had the chance and they would take it.
And everything was normal for a while, the rivalry between Gryffindor and Slytherin was pretty much gone, because of the saviour. Harry Potter had spend a few months of his life to make sure every Slytherin student would stay out of Azkaban, in the end they were all children of war. But still Ron Weasley couldn’t stop his hate for Slytherins, people had found him shouting to a terrified Harry Potter multiple times, exclaiming how all Slytherins had been death eaters and that Harry himself was as bad as they were.
Hermione Granger took her boyfriend’s side.
So yes, everything was normal for almost everyone, but Blaise couldn’t keep his eyes off the lonely saviour of the wizarding world, who looked like he’d wished he hadn’t survived this war.
He hated to admit it, but he had been watching Harry Potter since the start of the school year, hell he might’ve even started when they were still rebuilding Hogwarts. And Blaise had to admit, at the first year Harry could’ve fooled almost all of them that he was okay. He was still with Weasley and Granger and was always joking around, maybe he looked a little bit uncomfortable with all the attention, but he looked okay.
But when Blaise started looking more closely he noticed that this started way before that, whenever his friends weren’t looking at him, he would just kind of look lost. Like he wasn’t supposed to be here anymore.
It got even worse after Granger and Weasley left him, Harry Potter barely talked, ate or well left his dorm- The 8th years all got their private dorms and one big common room for all four houses.
Harry Potter was never found in that common room.
Blaise seemed to be the only one that noticed, maybe because he knew what loneliness looked like. He had never been the most popular in Hogwarts, his family didn’t have the best reputation and besides that he was one of the Slytherins who had always refused to bully the Gryffindors.
That pretty much made people dislike you in Slytherin so he knew what it felt like to be alone, even with your own house-mates.
And Blaise thought, maybe if no one else would, that he could help the Gryffindor boy.
Trying wouldn’t hurt right?
~
Harry was currently laying in the snow close to the black lake, it was pretty much empty here, everyone else was probably inside sitting in common rooms drinking hot chocolate. In a few days students would start going home and Harry would hopefully have the 8th grade common room for himself.
“Laying in the snow, Potter?” A voice said, though it didn’t sound rude in any way, it just sounded like the person didn’t know how else to start a conversation.
“Zabini,” Harry looked up in surprise, “I just needed to get away from everything.”
“I understand, mind if I join you?” Blaise asked and Harry shook his head, no he wouldn’t mind the company.
Harry was surprised when Blaise actually laid down next to him, expecting the boy to just sit down, to not get all his clothing wet. “What were you thinking about?” Blaise asked and then quickly added, “You don’t have to share of course.”
Harry hesitated, he had been thinking about the war. Dying in the forest only to lose just a small bit of himself instead of all of himself. Because Harry did see the horcrux he had taken care of for so long as a part of himself. The horcrux had also helped him, helped him heal, stabilize his magic and it even gave him some magical abilities.
“The war, how many people just accepted what they lost and immediately went back to being their old self.” Harry muttered, not a complete lie. He had thought about how his friends had just gave up on him when he admitted that he missed the soul piece of Tom Riddle, Ron calling him disgusting for even wanting the soul of the slimy snake back.
No one understood.
“It’s indeed weird.” Blaise responded quietly, “No one really seems to mourn anything. They just thanked you, made you more famous- which you obviously hate. And moved on.”
Blaise had noticed back in 4th grade that Harry Potter, contrary to popular belief, hated anything that had to do with fame. He had wanted to help the boy back then, but didn’t know how to, he was just a Slytherin boy after all.
“I always thought that coming back here would give me the chance to have one normal year, I’ve never had a normal school year yet, where I didn’t almost get killed.” Harry laughed, but it sounded bitter, “But now I regret it, I should’ve just locked myself up in my Godfathers house and live off the Potter fortune.” He looked at his hands, slightly embarrassed, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to-“
Blaise shook his head, leaning on an elbow to look at Harry for the first time, “Shh, It’s okay, don’t apologise. I can’t even begin to comprehend how you must feel.” Then he smiled, “We should probably get inside, though, this weather isn’t healthy even with multiple warming charms.”
“But-“
“I’m not going to force you to go to the common room, just come to the kitchen with me, we can sit there and talk.” Blaise said, Harry hesitated for a moment before nodding.
~
After that day Harry and Blaise were pretty much inseparable, both had been extremely lonely this year, always working alone. Now though, they had each other.
Neither of them really understood how they had gotten close so quickly; both being fairly closed off to people they don’t know. They blamed it on being the only two to stay in Hogwarts over the Christmas break.
After two months, it now being February, everyone had gotten used to seeing them together and both of them were generally a lot happier. Harry almost never hid somewhere again, he didn’t have a reason to want to get away from Blaise, so instead they spend days in the library together, or at the lake. Wherever they felt like going.
So that’s why Blaise was so worried when one night he walked into the common room late at night, because he couldn’t sleep, and he saw Harry hugging a pillow to his chest.
He sat down beside the Gryffindor that pretty much meant the world to him right now.
“Are you okay?” He whispered, softly laying his hand on Harry’s arm, not wanting to scare him. Harry jumped and shook his head, “No, not really.” He sounded so small and broken, it honestly broke Blaise’s heart.
Blaise carefully pulled the pillow out of Harry’s arms and opened his arms instead, shyly Harry accepted the embrace. “What’s wrong?”
“That day we met,” Harry started, “at the lake. I wasn’t lying what I was talking about, but it wasn’t all.” He took a deep breath and Blaise looked at the boy in his arm, worried. “You don’t have to tell me,” he muttered and Harry nodded, “I know.”
Blaise leaned back into the couch, pulling Harry back with him, till the smaller boy was laying half on top of him, the boy blushed slightly, but he could tell that the boy was still deep in his thoughts.
“I want to tell you, though, I trust you.” Harry muttered, “But when I told Ron and Hermione this, they told me to stop being crazy and then- well you know.” Harry turned his face, successfully burying it in Blaise’s shirt.
“Shh, I’m not going to blame you, for whatever you tell me.” Blaise said, slowly stroking Harry’s hair. The whole physical contact thing was a new thing, Harry usually shied away from touches.
Harry moved his head again, his ear now pressed against Blaise’s chest instead, just so Blaise could hear him talk. “Dumbledore forced us to destroy the horcruxes that Voldemort made, that’s why we weren’t at school 2 years ago.” He muttered and Blaise tightened his arms around the Gryffindor boy, he hadn’t known that Voldemort made horcruxes, of course he didn’t, he had been on the dark side- forced of course- for a while.
“When we came back to Hogwarts we knew we had three to go, but we could only find two.” Harry said, “Turns out that I was the third one, Dumbledore the absolute fucker, found out in my 5th year and didn’t think it was important for me to know.” Harry sighed, “Or he just wanted me to make a fast decision and not being able to think through the fact that I had to sacrifice myself.”
Blaise was trying to keep himself in control at this point, if the old coot had still been alive, he would’ve done some things that would make him end up in Azkaban, but he honestly didn’t care if he could protect the boy that was currently laying on top of him.
Harry looked up to see Blaise staring at him, “I did die again, but it only killed the horcrux.” Harry whispered, “Sometimes I wish I had died with it, I feel so- so empty. I’m missing a part of my- my soul that I’ve had since I was one.”
Harry looked away, whispering, “You must think I’m crazy.” Blaise shook his head and Harry smiled softly, “Then you must be crazy, too. Everyone else I’ve told thought I suddenly supported the dark lord and wanted him back.”
“I just want my soul back,” he whispered, “the soul piece is Tom Riddle not Voldemort. Just another orphan- who grew up with muggles- trying to do what’s best for the world. We’re so similar.”
Blaise grabbed Harry’s hand, interlocking their fingers and making soothing circles with the thumb on the back of his hand. “It makes sense, you grew up with that piece, had it as long as you can remember.” Blaise muttered and Harry whispered, “Thank you for understanding.” It was so quiet that Blaise could barely hear it.
“You’re so strong.” Blaise just responded, “So much stronger than anyone notices, I would do anything to take away a bit of your pain, to make you happier.”
“You already do,” Harry said and once again he looked up, blushing slightly when he realised Blaise probably didn’t look away once. He leaned up slightly, so he could look at Blaise properly, admire him. “You already made me a lot happier, by just being here.” He whispered and then he moved- or Blaise moved- forward and their lips touched.
It was such a sweet, soft kiss and it ended in a few second. When he pulled back Harry looked embarrassed, “I’m sorry,” he whispered, “I’m sorry- oh, I just ruined everything didn’t I?”
“Harry-“ Blaise said, but Harry just kept blaming himself, not even slightly listening to Blaise assuring words. Not listening to Blaise saying that he liked it, liked him.
So instead Blaise tilted Harry’s face up, making him look into Blaise eyes, before Blaise leaned in again. Harry froze, not moving away, but also not responding in anyway.
Blaise hoped he hadn’t ruined it now, the boy had been so insecure about Blaise hating him that Blaise just had to prove him wrong, but maybe he had read the situation wrong.
But then Harry started moving his lips, responding almost shyly and Blaise smiled into the kiss. He backed away after a few seconds though, just to mutter, “I’ve wanted to do that for so long.”
Harry smiled at him, “Me too.”
Fin.