Chapter Text
"You know," said Detective Collins conversationally, "if most of these guys hadn't been dead longer than you've been alive, I'd be wondering if you were some kind of serial killer."
Danny hunched his shoulders. As a… whatever he was, he had some powers. Intangibility, invisibility, overshadowing, transformation, ghost sense, and now… this. He guessed it might be an extension of his ghost sense. After all, both had to do with finding dead people.
"What is this one, the sixth?"
"Fifth," corrected Danny, although that didn't make him any less miserable. He stared through the trees at the swarm of forensics people. This was the fifth dead human body he'd been drawn to since the Accident, not counting the incidents at the cemetery and the hospital.
Collins scribbled something on his notepad then snapped it closed. “Okay, off the record?”
“Huh? Uh, sure?”
“Is this some new thing from your parents? Did they make a dead body finder and scrap it because it didn’t find ghosts? Because, if so, the department would definitely like to get our hands on one.”
“What?”
Collins sighed, slightly, and continued at a slightly slower pace. “If the reason you’re finding all these bodies is that you’re using one of your parents’ inventions, the police department will buy it from you. Heck, we’d commission a dozen from your parents.”
“It isn’t an invention,” said Danny. “But, I mean, that sounds like a good idea. I don’t know how it’d work, but if it did, I could see it.”
As soon as he finished speaking, he wanted to punch himself in his face. A perfect excuse, and he just hammered it to pieces.
“Pity,” said Collins. “But this,” –he pointed at where Danny had found the skeleton– “isn’t normal. Finding five bodies like this by coincidence is unheard of. Did you get cursed or something?”
Danny shrugged. Honestly, he might as well be cursed. “My ancestors on my Dad’s side were witch hunters way back when, so it wouldn’t really surprise me, but… I haven’t heard of any curse? That doesn’t mean that I would have heard of a curse, even if there was one…”
“Hm. Think you’re haunted?”
“My parents are ghost hunters,” said Danny. “They aren’t always the most observant, but–”
“Danny!” There was a crash near the park entrance. Danny winced and blushed. Marley Park was one of the biggest and wildest still in Amity Park’s services district, but they weren’t actually that far from the entrance. It was very easy to recognize the sounds of his father’s driving.
“Did anyone tell them this was an active crime scene?” muttered Collins, flipping his pad back open.
“Probably multiple times,” said Danny. Collins flinched a little, having probably not intended for Danny to hear. Oh, well.
Danny’s parents thundered down the path, followed by a lot of shouting.
“Danny, baby!” said Maddie, throwing her arms around him. “What happened? What are you even doing all the way out here?”
“He found a body,” said Collins. “Specifically a skeleton.”
“What?” said Maddie. “Again?”
“Ohhh,” said Jack, almost growling. “I know what this is! This is some blasted ghost trying to make our Danny look bad!” He pulled out a bazooka. “When I find it, I’m gonna–!”
“Mr. Fenton,” said Detective Collins, “please, there are no ghosts here. We took ectoplasm readings when we got here, first thing. This is a crime scene. You need to put your weapon away.”
Jack grumbled, but did so. The other policemen in the area, who had put their hands on their weapons, slowly relaxed.
“Anyway,” said Collins, “this is an older body, so we…” He trailed off and made a face. “I think we all can agree this isn’t a coincidence anymore, but it’s safe to say that Danny wasn’t involved in the actual death of this person.”
“Of course,” said Maddie, who was still checking Danny over, as if the years-dead skeleton could have hurt him.
“Anyway, if you, any of you, ever figure out what’s causing…” He gestured at Danny.
“Right,” said Maddie. “We’ll let you know.”
Danny shrugged, because he sure wouldn’t.
“And our offer to refer you to a therapist still stands.”
“Thank you,” said Maddie. “We’ll talk about it.”
Danny was bundled down the path and into the back seat of the GAV. He slumped, feeling exhausted.
“Danny,” said Maddie, after Jack had started the engine. “Why were you out here?”
Jack backed up enthusiastically, and Danny used his need to adjust his position as an excuse not to answer right away. “I was just walking,” said Danny.
“Without your friends?” pressed Maddie. “Or did they just leave before the police showed up this time?”
“They weren’t there,” said Danny.
Of course, the reason they weren’t there was that they hadn’t been able to keep up with the ghost fight once it started to go through walls. And then, of course, Skulker just had to pick Danny up and rub in the fact that Danny couldn’t fly.
Jerk.
Danny much preferred Technus. At least he only trapped Danny in video games and acted like an avuncular and completely out of touch mad scientist. Dealing with him was almost fun, if completely terrifying sometimes.
(Pac Man was an abomination that should never have been created.)
Anyway, Danny had, eventually, managed to get Skulker back to ground level and fish him out of his stupid helmet. By that point, though, he’d been in the park, and then he had to get out of the park and that’s when he’d noticed the pull. And there was only one thing that particular pull led to.
Danny couldn’t just leave the body once he’d found it. That would be… Well, illegal, probably, but considering he was a kinda-sorta vigilante whose existence was illegal under the Anti-Ecto Acts, he didn’t really care about that. It was more about leaving a person forgotten and unmourned. Not given proper rites, whatever those were for the person in question.
Maddie sighed at him. Danny squirmed in his seat.
“They really weren’t with me at the park.”
“But you still haven’t said why you were there.”
“I was just walking.”
“Mhm,” said Maddie, dubiously. “But why there?”
“Why not there?”
“Because it’s all the way across the city!” said Maddie.
“You’d tell us if you knew you were being haunted, right, Danno?” asked Jack.
“Yeah,” said Danny. Well, if a ghost was really harassing him, he might. He’d told them about Johnny. He hadn’t told him about Skulker, though. Was what Skulker was doing really haunting, though?
Attempted murder, though, sure. Danny didn’t think he could leave without his skin, after all.
Maddie sighed. “Alright.”
That signaled the end of the conversation, and Danny slid his phone out of pocket to text Sam and Tucker.
Danny: im w my prints
Danny: left the park
Sam: u ok
Danny: ye
Tucker: u sure? skulker got u rely good that time
Tucker: and he picked u up. still p sure u cant fly
Danny: shut up
Sam: yeah tuck thats the thing hes sensitive about
Danny sighed and put his phone away. It was over and done with. Everything was going to be fine.
At least, until the next time he found a dead body. But how many missing dead people could there be in Amity Park?
.
The next time they went on a field trip, Danny wanted to beat his head in for even thinking something like that.
“Uh, Danny,” said Tucker, “you’re eying that wall really intensely.”
“Yeah,” said Danny, “that’s because there’s a corpse in it.”
“What.”
“Yeah, that was my reaction.”
“Hey, guys,” said Sam, walking up behind Danny and Tucker. “I hate to interrupt your contemplation, but the art’s hung up over there . Why are you both staring at a wall? Are you turning into cats?”
“Well, Danny can already detect ghosts–”
Danny elbowed him in the side. “There’s a dead body in the wall,” he muttered.
Sam’s eyebrows went up. “In an art museum?”
“That is where we are.”
“You know what I mean. What’re you going to do?”
Danny ran a hand through his hair, frustrated. “I don’t know. It’s not like there’s any,” –he waved his hand at the wall– “ evidence, so I can’t just call.”
“Didn’t that one detective dude give you his phone number?” asked Tucker. “Maybe he’d believe you.”
“I don’t know…”
“You could come back as, you know, and phase it out,” suggested Sam.
“My alter ego has enough problems without being associated with murder.”
“Maybe you could be an anonymous tip,” said Tucker, fiddling with the power button of his PDA. “I could look up how.”
Danny made a face. “They all know who I am.”
“All of them?” asked Tucker, skeptically.
“You try calling in five separate skeletons while being the son of ghost hunters. Yes, they all know who I am.”
“You could still leave a letter.”
“You could ‘accidentally’ put a hole in the wall,” said Sam. “Or you could phase something halfway in, and then when they have to clean it up, they’ll find it?”
“Doesn’t do much good when they might be the people to put it in in the first place,” said Danny, making a face.
“Could you tip someone off as… you know?”
“Same problem phasing it out of the wall.” He covered his eyes, feeling the approach of a headache.
Ugh. He was going to have to punch a hole in this wall.
He’d have to do it soon, too, otherwise the tour would move on and he’d have to try something else.
“Mr. Fenton, Miss Manson, Mr. Foley,” called Mr. Lancer, “we’re– Mr. Fenton! Catcher in the Rye! Why would you punch the wall?” Over his shoulder, the tour guide and a security guard started jogging over.
“Uh,” said Danny, cradling his hand, because punching through drywall with his stupid unprotected human hand hurt. “Because… There’s a skeleton in it?”
Why did he feel the need to tell the truth in stupid, stupid situations like this?
“Mr. Fenton,” said Mr. Lancer, thunderously, “stop making up–” Danny knew the moment Mr. Lancer actually looked into the hole in the wall, because his face went the color of milk. “ The Cask of Amontillado, ” he said, then sat down.
.
“So,” said Detective Collins, looking at the wall. “You want to explain how you knew this one was there?”
Danny didn’t have to fake the tears of frustration in his eyes. His powers were so stupid sometimes.
“Well,” said the detective. “This is sure going to be a murder mystery and a half, then.”
.
“So, are we off to solve a murder?” asked Tucker.
“Why would we be solving a murder?” asked Danny, dropping his backpack on the floor of the bus, where they were waiting for the police to be done with all of them.
Tucker blinked. “Because you just found a dead body.”
“It’s hardly the first time,” said Danny, quietly. He didn’t exactly want something like that to become common knowledge among his fellow students. Not that he expected it would stay quiet or anything.
“Well, yeah, but those were just, you know, accidental deaths.”
“We don’t know that. We don’t know anything about solving murders, either. Why are you suddenly so gung-ho about this? I thought dead bodies freaked you out.”
“Sure do,” agreed Tucker. He shrugged. “Murder mysteries are cool, though.”
“Wow,” said Sam, looking up from her paperback. “You aren’t okay with hospitals, but murder–”
“Look, it happened a long time ago, okay? Guy was a skeleton. Whoever killed him must be long dead by now.”
“Yeah,” drawled Danny. “Long dead. Because length of time spent dead is a good indicator of how much of a problem someone is going to be. How long have Desiree and Poindexter been dead? How about Technus?”
Tucker opened his mouth, closed it, went through a variety of emotions, then pushed himself to the end of the bench, muttering.
Danny leaned back, too. Rumors at school and his bruised knuckles aside, this was almost peaceful.
“HEY!” bellowed Dash from the front of the bus. “CORPSE SNIFFER!”
Aaaaaand there it went.