Chapter Text
Qiqi clung tightly to her basket as she stretched her short arm up to pluck a flower that grew out from the rock face. She added it to the rest of the herbs she had collected thus far before she walked along in search of more. The small child came to the edge of a nearby river, the bank too steep to reach the shoreline, but as she peered down, she caught sight of something she needed.
Setting the basket to the side, she lay down on her belly, little arm reaching out in a desperate attempt to pull up the plant. Qiqi teetered on the edge, and she lost her balance.
“Careful!”
Trembling hands cradled the girl, preventing her fall, and she was pulled close against the chest of a young woman. Qiqi looked up at her, an apologetic look contained in her eyes.
“I’m sorry, Lumine,” she murmured softly.
Lumine shook her head as she let out a sigh of relief. “Next time, let one of us accompany you,” she insisted. “Who knows what could have happened if I hadn’t made it on time…”
She held the child in one arm as she stooped to pick up the basket of herbs. With a soft kiss to Qiqi’s forehead, Lumine carried her back home on a considerably long trek through the forest.
The house was small, tucked away in a small clearing with a tiny creek snaking through the back yard. There was a garden as well, a combination of little plants peeking out of the ground and long, winding vines that wrapped around posts.
As the two of them approached, a man appeared from the garden, his pace brisk. He reached their side and brought the two into a tight hug, causing Qiqi to whine in complaint.
“You’re back,” he murmured softly.
Lumine bit back a small chuckle as she patted the back of his head. “We’re okay, Xiao,” she reassured him. “She just wandered off on her own.”
“Again,” Xiao added. His hold on them tightened somehow, and soon enough Lumine was letting out a noise of complaint as well. He reluctantly loosened his grip, but still kept one hand on her arm.
Qiqi squirmed in Lumine’s hold and slipped away to stand on her own. The pair watched the small child retrieve her basket from Lumine’s hand before she walked up to the house and went inside.
“Are you hurt?”
Lumine gave a small shake of her head as he gave her appearance a close inspection, his amber eyes brimming with worry. She reached out to cradle his face, urging him to look back at her. “I promise, nothing happened,” she reassured him again. “Remember what Zhongli told you?”
He squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath. “Right, sorry…”
“Don’t apologize,” Lumine said softly. “Just remember what you’ve been told.”
Xiao covered her hands with his, amber eyes peeking back at her. “You’re safe,” he recited. “You can protect yourself. I don’t have to be by your side all the time. You’re safe.”
“I’m safe,” she confirmed. “Why don’t we head inside?”
He kept a firm hold on one hand as they followed after Qiqi, finding the girl sorting through the herbs she had collected. Lumine gently pulled away from him to assist the child, and Xiao watched as the two of them shared small smiles and giggles. Occasionally Lumine would be corrected by Qiqi’s soft voice urging the woman in the right direction.
The sight lulled Xiao into a sense of safety and comfort, and his pounding heart gradually calmed.
For the past two years now, this setting had become familiar to him, this place his home. He had people he could consider family, those he called his friends. After so long, whenever he stared down at his hands, he didn’t see blood staining his palms anymore.
Albeit his demons would never completely leave him.
“Are you going to see the doctor today?” Lumine asked gently.
Xiao gave a stiff nod. “She insisted upon it,” he admitted wearily.
A smile found her lips as Lumine cocked her head. “You know she only worries for you. Nothing more.”
“I-I know, but--”
“I won’t push you,” Lumine reassured him. “Only reminding. She sees you like a son.”
The corner of his mouth twitched in annoyance. “The same way she sees you and your brother?” he asked.
“Of course.”
Xiao swiftly turned his back to her, hiding the pain written across his face. “I’m going,” he snapped. Xiao winced at his own harsh tone, but he brushed it off as he fled from the house.
There would be time to apologize later when he’d cooled off.
The pathway from their home through the forest was winding, a well trodden dirt road, and it wasn’t long before he found himself in a bustling little village. It was well secluded at the base of a mountain, the wood around it keeping unwanted visitors from exploring too close, the sheer rock towering over them served as a natural wall, and the mist that cascaded down to conceal their presence.
The people that lived here went about their days in peace, undisturbed by the conflict that occurred outside. They would call out to one another like friendly neighbors, gossiping and bartering. Children ran about, playing with toys and chasing one another. Their laughter echoed between the buildings that lined the main street, their joy contagious as the adults they passed by began to smile brightly.
At the head of the village was a small, yet cozy, home. The sign hanging above the door had on it, in fancy, curved handwriting: “Doctor Asmoday”.
There was a short line of people standing outside, most of them with baskets in hand. Some contained preserved cans of food, while others were piled high with expensive fabrics. When Xiao approached, the villagers fell silent, backing away. They maintained a wide berth as he strode up to the door, doing his best to ignore their piercing stares.
Xiao lifted his hand and knocked, a resounding thud ringing out. As he turned to look back, the people were already shuffling away, whispering amongst themselves.
“Ah, it’s wonderful to see you.”
He returned his gaze to the front, coming face-to-face with the kind smile of the woman standing in the open doorway. Xiao didn’t say anything in response to her. Truthfully, he couldn’t tell if she was being genuine or not. The moment he went to speak his doubts, Lumine’s words echoed in his head, stopping him in his tracks.
“Please, come inside,” she said, beckoning him forth as she moved aside.
The first step had a cold chill shooting down his spine, but as stood in the middle of the kitchen of her home, gradually he began to come back to his senses. The doctor waved him towards the dining table, and as he took the offered seat, she set down a cup of warm tea before him.
He eyed it warily, swallowing thickly. The doctor sat across from him, quietly sipping her own cup. She didn’t say a word, patiently waiting for him to break the ice. Xiao was stubborn, remaining silent, but the doctor was used to the silent treatment from him. He would give in eventually.
“What did you want to see me about?” he asked.
The doctor hid the smile on her face with a sip of her tea, and by the time the delicate cup had been settled upon the table, her expression gave away nothing. “I hear you’ve been struggling lately,” she began, “with Mr. Zhongli, I mean. Is there a problem with the treatment method?”
Xiao grit his teeth, his fingernails digging into the wooden table. “Nothing is wrong,” he choked.
“Hm, you’ll have to do better than that to convince me,” the doctor told him with a sigh. “Did he say something to you?”
“He…He said I’m no different from the person I was when I first came here.”
“Ah…” The doctor went silent, tapping her chin deep in thought. “And how did you react when he said that to you?”
Xiao averted his gaze. “I got angry,” he admitted. “But I had every right to be! I’m not who I used to be. I’m not that monster’s puppet. I have a will of my own now!”
Tilting her head, the doctor observed him closely. “And have you spoken to Zhongli since?”
“Of course not,” Xiao snapped. His blood boiled at the mere thought. “If anything, I should be waiting for his apology, shouldn’t I?”
This time, the doctor laughed, her amber eyes bright with amusement. “Pardon me,” she got out between bouts, earning herself a fierce and questionable glare. “Your anger is a good sign.”
“What do you mean?”
“When you first came here, you were simply tagging along with Lumine. You lacked any care about your own wellbeing. Even when the villagers shunned you, you didn’t bat an eye at them,” she explained. “Now, you’re pissed at the mere suggestion that you are the man you once were. I’d say that’s progress.”
Xiao scoffed, crossing his arms. “Still doesn’t make it right to say that…”
“Did you give Zhongli a chance to explain himself?”
Xiao turned further away, hiding his expression, but the way his ears flushed gave away his embarrassment.
“Give him a second chance,” she encouraged as she stood up. “Let me get your medicine for you.”
The doctor disappeared from the kitchen, leaving Xiao staring at his cup of tea. It had gone cold already, but he did pick it up to test the flavor. He swiftly recoiled at the taste, finding it bitter and inedible. By the time she had returned, he’d replaced the cup and was waiting patiently.
“Remember not to give yourself too much,” she reminded him. The doctor handed him a pouch of powder, and he held it carefully. “It’s stronger than the last batch.”
He eyed it warily. “Will it help this time?”
“Sadly I can’t guarantee anything,” the doctor admitted wearily. “All I can do is keep trying.”
Nodding stiffly, Xiao stood up, keeping the pouch close to him. He awkwardly bit out a quick “goodbye” before he vacated the house. Once outside, he took a deep breath, laying a hand over his pounding heart. Being near her always put him on edge, feeling more nervous than usual. In the beginning he hadn’t been able to stand anywhere near her, but after some time he could manage this much.
Walking through the village, he stopped by a stall selling pretty trinkets and jewelry. The owner looked less than pleased to see Xiao, but the man did his best to hide his feelings behind a forced smile. Xiao paid more than he should have, but he still walked away with a small grin and a bracelet in his hand.
Something hit him on the side of his head, sending Xiao staggering as he dropped to his knees. Shock had him frozen in place, flinching when something was flung against his shoulder. Xiao shuddered when he heard the laughter of children, his chest tight as he felt blood slip down his cheek and drop onto the dirt beneath him.
“Bullseye!” one kid shouted.
“Take that, demon!” another hissed. “Go back to where you came from!”
“Nobody wants you here!” a third chimed in.
Xiao grit his teeth. He wanted to lash back at them, to hurt them back, but as his gaze found the cluster of children, he restrained himself. The adults nearby had stood by to watch at first, but now they were hurrying forth to usher the kids away. They had fear in their eyes when they looked back at Xiao. All he could do was take it.
“Can you stand?”
Slowly lifting his head, Xiao came to see Aether kneeling in front of him, offering a hand. The golden eyed man had concern creasing his brow, and when Xiao took his hand, he helped the injured man to his feet.
“I’m fine,” Xiao said, his voice strained.
Sighing, Aether shook his head as he took out a cloth to wipe Xiao’s face. “And what would my sister say if she saw you like this?” he asked. “She’d be up in arms against the entire village!”
Xiao grimaced, looking down at the blood soaked cloth in Aether’s hand. “She wouldn’t…”
“She absolutely would,” Aether insisted. “You can’t have already forgotten that she became a soldier and risked her life in war just to find you. A village full of civilians wouldn’t stop her from helping you.”
“Y-You don’t mean she’d…”
Aether blinked in confusion for a moment. “Gods, no!” he gasped, shaking his head. “She’s not going to hurt them! Well, mostly.”
“Let me guess: breaking a few bones?”
“Pretty much,” Aether admitted.
Xiao chuckled weakly. He checked on both the medicine pouch and the bracelet he’d kept a firm grip on, and he was relieved to find them in good condition. “I remember she broke a kid’s hand once,” he murmured. “When we were little.”
“Ah.” Aether hummed in agreement. “He’d been bugging the two of us for a while.”
“He used to throw rocks at us, bury us in dirt, and steal our money,” Xiao recalled.
“Then one day he made the mistake of pulling Lumine’s hair,” Aether added, smiling.
Xiao grinned back at him. “She turned on him and kicked his shin.”
“And stepped on his hand when he fell. She probably didn’t intend on breaking any bones, but…”
The two of them laughed at the memory, the recent incident long forgotten.
Aether shook his head. “Are you headed back home now?”
“I was,” Xiao confirmed, “until those brats came along.”
The blond reached out to gently pat Xiao’s shoulder in an attempt to help comfort him. “Make sure she doesn’t forget about dinner tonight,” Aether said pointedly.
“She wouldn’t forget,” Xiao insisted.
Aether shrugged as he backed away. “You never know. Looking after two kids can be quite the handful.” With a wave, the blond hurried across the street, meeting up with a taller blond man who had been waiting for him.
As Xiao watched them leave, he frowned to himself. “Two kids?” he repeated. “Wait a--I’m not a kid!”
He was still somewhat annoyed when he returned home, finding the house quiet. Xiao walked quietly over the wooden floorboards, avoiding the places that would creak, and he found Lumine and Qiqi curled up together in a chair in the kitchen, fast asleep. Smiling warmly, he deposited the medicine and bracelet on the counter and retrieved a blanket from Qiqi’s room. He covered the two of them with it, but when he turned to walk away, a hand grabbed the hem of his shirt and tugged, keeping him in place.
“Welcome home,” Lumine said, her voice sleepy.
Xiao smiled down at her and took her hand in his. “It’s good to be back,” he murmured softly. “I can carry you both to bed if you want.”
Lumine shook her head. “We’re fine,” she insisted. “Just a little worn out.”
“Are you going to be awake for dinner at Aether’s?” Xiao asked. He chuckled when she whined in complaint. “We can always reschedule.”
“It’s fine.” She huffed, gently prodding Qiqi to wake her. “It was just very comfy.”
Xiao scooped Qiqi out of Lumine’s lap, smiling when the little girl sleepily wiped her eyes. Lumine stood, stretching her arms high above her head as she let out a large yawn. She led the way to their bedroom, and as she rummaged through the dresser for nicer clothes, Xiao set Qiqi down on the edge of the bed.
Lumine handed him his clothes to change as she went to retrieve a set for Qiqi from her room, and within minutes they were all wearing the nicest clothes they owned. Although, the Xiao from two years ago would have cried from laughter at the idea of this being considered “nice” in any form or fashion.
Qiqi had on a plain purple dress with her long hair tied up in a braided crown. Xiao wore a simple white shirt and a pair of black pants. Lumine was draped in a brilliant light blue dress that stopped just past her knees and hugged her form around the waist. She fastened the flower shaped clip in her hair while she looked at her reflection in the mirror.
“Ready?” Xiao asked.
Lumine nodded as she took Qiqi’s hand, the other already snug in Xiao’s grip. They walked together to the village as the sun began to set. At first glance, one would easily mistake the three of them as a lovely married couple and their cherished daughter, but the truth was a much longer story. Perhaps such delusions were fine for outsiders.
Aether’s home resided on the outskirts of the village, a quiet corner that backed up to the base of the mountain. It was reasonably larger than the house the three of them lived in, but Xiao never found himself envious of that fact. He was always more than happy…and the smaller house meant an excuse to be closer to Lumine anyway.
Dinner that night was a peaceful affair. Aether’s home cooking was something to look forward to, and with Lumine there to carry the conversation, Xiao could enjoy his meal without any expectations to speak more than a few words at a time. On the other side of the table, Dainsleif was equally quiet. His blue eyes were sharp, but not judgemental whenever he glanced at Xiao.
For the most part, however, he kept his attention solely on Aether. Xiao silently hummed in acknowledgement, his own gaze held by Lumine’s radiance. The two of them could certainly agree on how amazing these twins were.
The walk back home was quiet as well. Qiqi, despite being around the same age as the noisy children in the village, rarely raised her voice whenever she decided to speak. On the other hand, while Lumine might be loud and outspoken, she was a calm presence when it was the three of them.
His life like this was peaceful, the days slow and uneventful. There were only the occasional hiccups, but even then Xiao could never find himself lingering in negativity. Gone were the days of pushing himself beyond the point of exhaustion for someone else. Now, he could live for what he wanted, and he had people by his side that cared for him and understood him, even if he couldn’t always reciprocate.
But is it really possible to escape your own demons?