Chapter Text
"Yami! YAMI!"
“Ya-mi. Ya-mi.”
The voices and the sound of running feet echoed through the hideout. As Yami opened the common room door to find out what the disaster was this time, he realised that it was not an echo. Two children were calling his name, and neither of them were Magna.
Finral crashed into Yami's legs in a whirlwind of tears and catastrophe. As Yami patted the boy on the head, he grinned at Luck. "You're getting good at that. We need to work on your vocabulary, but you've got the hang of 'Yami'."
Luck grinned and dodged to his corner of the room where he could curl up on the beanbag and play with his toys. He continued to sing-song, "Yami, Yami, Yami," as he did.
"So, Little Finral," Yami said to the child wrapped around his legs. "What's the problem?"
"He's.... He's... He's going to do it, Yami. I tried to tell him not to. I did. And he pretended that he was listening, but he wasn't and now he's going to do it and he's going to get killed or mirror magicked or something terrible and I really, really did tell him not to."
Yami put his hands under the sobbing child's arms and lifted him so that he could cry onto Yami's chest. "I'm not following, kid. Who's 'he'? And what's he going to do?"
"M...Magna. Magna's going to do it."
"Do what?"
Finral pulled himself away from Yami's chest so that he could look the man in the eye. His sobs stilled for a moment so that he could say clearly. "He's going to ask Gauche if he can marry Marie."
This was going to be a disaster. Finral was right. Magna was going to be mirror magicked at the very least. They would be lucky if he even survived to frame a question that contained the word Marie. "VANESSA!" Yami yelled. "We've got a problem."
She poked her head out of the library two doors down. "Yeah?"
"Magna's gonna ask Gauche if he can marry Marie,"
"Oh, shit."
"Where are they?" Yami asked Finral.
"They're outside. Magna said that Gauche was going for a walk and that he was going to ask him now, because he was in love and he couldn't wait any longer."
"Magna was in love with William yesterday," Vanessa said. "And it was Charmy the day before. And Owen before that."
"And today it's Marie," Finral said as if that made sense. "You have to rescue him."
"I guess. No one wants to explain to William why his favourite magic knight got blasted with mirror magic, do they?" Yami put Finral back onto the ground and the boy grabbed his hand. "He'd cry and ruin his pretty face. Let's go."
Before they left, Vanessa poked her head in to where Luck was playing and still singing Yami's name. "Vanessa. Van-Ness-a," she prompted and flashed him a thumbs up.
Luck copied the gesture and said happily, "Yami."
"He'll get it one day," she said as she followed Yami and Finral into the garden.
Yami's imagination invented various possibilities of what might be happening between Magna and Gauche. Most of them included fireballs, mirror magic and major injuries of some kind. He was wondering if he should call Owen and if it was worth sending Vanessa to get Gordon and his first aid supplies prepared.
Of all the sights he had expected when he reached the garden, he had not predicted what was in front of his eyes.
The first surprise was that Magna was alive. The second was that he was not in a fight for his life against multiple arrays of mirrors. Gauche was not trying to kill the child who uttered Marie's name.
Nor was he yelling. Or even moving very much.
"Yami," Magna said. He had been tugging on Gauche's sleeve. "I think Mr Gauche is broken."
"Yeah. I think so." Yami left Finral with Vanessa. He waved his hand in front of Gauche's face. There was no reaction. His face was blank and his eyes unseeing. It was as if he was a puppet with the strings cut.
"Do you think I learned statue magic when I didn't mean to?" Magna asked. "Cause that would be amazing even if I'm sorry that I turned Mr Gauche into a statue. I'd like statue magic, even though fire magic is the best and... ow, Finral. What're you doing?"
"Come here," Finral had edged forward. He grabbed Magna's arm and pulled. "I told you not to do that. You have broken him, and maybe he won't ever be fixed..."
"But Finral. You said he was going to be angry. Not a statue person. I only asked him if I could..." The rest of the words were muffled behind Finral's hand clamped to his mouth.
Vanessa came to stand beside Yami. She was looking at Gauche with her head tilted to one side. "He could be broken."
"I think his brain short circuited. I don't think he's ready to hear the word 'marriage'."
Gauche's lips began to move even though his gaze was still far away. "M... M..."
Yami turned to Magna. "I think you should run, kid."
Magna and Finral ran, but in the end it was unnecessary. Yami and Vanessa led Gauche into the hideout in the same catatonic state. He continued to mutter the same, "M... M..." sound. Vanessa took him into the library, where he waited under Gordon's patient observation.
Yami sat Magna down in the common room. "What exactly did you say to Gauche?"
Magna's legs were swinging off the edge of the sofa. "I said that me and Marie were in love, and we wanted to get married. And that because he was Marie's brother, I had to ask him first, because Marie said I had to."
Yami felt his mouth fall open. "Marie. Marie knows about this?"
"It was her idea. You can't get married to someone if they aren't your best-love. Like, I can't get married to William because he's twenty-seven and he's probably already got a best-love. And Owen has Ben for his best-love. And my sheep is a sheep. Marie hasn't got a best-love yet, so I said I could be her best-love, and then she said that we would have to get married to prove it. I had to tell Gauche because that is the proper way to do things. Weddings have cake. Do you know that?"
"Let me get this right. Marie decided that you were her best-love, and you had to get married..."
"Because weddings have cake," Magna put in.
"And that you needed to tell her brother because she told you to."
"Yup. I like cake, Yami."
"Well, damn. Marie's a..."
Vanessa whistled. "She's a danger. I like her."
Magna frowned at Vanessa. "She's my best-love."
"Yeah. I know,” Yami sighed. “Because cake."
Vanessa grinned. It was a grin that filled Yami full of dread. Vanessa had a plan. "You know what, Magna. I like cake too.”
She was as bad as Marie.
"What are you planning?" Yami asked her once they had sent Magna and Finral off with strict instructions to play somewhere as far from Gauche as possible. Finral took his role very seriously and gripped Magna's hand as they went to find Charmy, who could always be relied on to suggest something fun.
Vanessa finished her tea. "Me? Why do you think I'm planning? You have a suspicious mind."
"I have a suspicious mind, because that's tea. You only drink tea when you're planning."
"I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm going out. I've got to visit a supplier."
Yami narrowed his eyes at her, but she smiled sweetly and left.
Luck was still in his corner. "I think we're in big trouble," Yami told him.
Luck nodded wisely and went back to spinning the sparkly device that Cob had given him.
By bedtime, Gauche had managed to progress to ‘Mar, mar’" sounds. Gordon and Grey surrounded him with as many Marie artefacts as they could find without disturbing the most obvious shrines. They were confident that Gauche would be back to normal by the morning.
"Is that 'mar' for Marie, or marriage," Yami whispered.
Gordon shrugged. He said something that was too quiet to hear.
"Right. Yeah. I think I'll keep the kids out of the way tomorrow. Maybe you could convince him that he imagined it?"
Gordon answered something that seemed to be an affirmative. Grey nodded.
Yami tried not to be too anxious that Vanessa did not return to the hideout that night. Or the next.
Keeping Magna away from Gauche worked. By the next morning he was only a little glassy eyed. Every time he looked like he was going to stare into the distance, Gordon or Grey would thrust a picture of Marie into his hands or suggest that he show them the Marie sculptures.
Magna was oblivious to the drama he had caused, which both relieved Yami and infuriated him. The boy declared that his best-love was Nero the first day, and then back to William, where his affections normally rested, the following day. Yami wondered if Marie would be offended that the five-year-old’s attention span for love interests was as short as it was for most things that weren’t fireballs or William.