Work Text:
You with the sad eyes
Don’t be discouraged, oh I realize
It’s hard to take courage
In a world full of people
You can lose sight of it all
The darkness inside you
Can make you feel so small
Kyoya sighed and closed his laptop. Taking off his glasses, he rubbed between his eyes as a headache was in full effect. After replacing his glasses, he checked his phone and groaned when he saw that it was 3 AM.
The young man, in his third year at Ouran Academy, decided a shower would help him get some sleep. He got off his couch and made his way into the bathroom, making sure the water was at a suitable temperature.
After a much needed but probably too long at this time of night shower, Kyoya towel-dried his hair as he made his way to his bed. Wearing a pair of black sweatpants, Kyoya laid back on his bed and checked his phone one final time. 4 AM was not ideal, but it was doable. At least his morning class had been cancelled due to the teacher coming down with a nasty cold.
Just as he set his phone down and pulled his plush comforter to his chin, his phone dinged.
Curious.
Who would be awake and messaging him at this hour?
Kyoya picked up his phone and sighed.
Tamaki: I’m so excited that class is cancelled! Now we have more time to plan club activities! Wanna meet for coffee and talk details mon ami?
Shaking his head and closing his eyes a moment, Kyoya breathed out slowly. He knew what his friend was doing. Tamaki was just trying to cheer him up.
Kyoya’s father had been especially hard on him lately. Usually he could tolerate his father’s indifference and stony demeanor. Ootori men were expected to be perfect, after all. But for some reason, Yoshio Ootori has decided that Kyoya is not perfect enough. Every little thing he does is met with harsh critique and reprimand. He was even grounded for being late to dinner.
Grounded!
Kyoya Ootori had never been grounded before. He had never stepped out of line or given his father cause to mete out such a punishment.
Realizing Tamaki would not go to sleep unless he received a response, Kyoya typed back a short reply.
Kyoya: Sure. Meet in the courtyard at 9.
Kyoya cringed. Meeting at 9, which meant he had to be dressed and downstairs ready to go by 8:30. And that meant he had to wake up by 7 so as to make himself presentable to the public and make a brief appearance at the breakfast table. Checking the time and sighing again, Kyoya rubbed his eyes under his glasses and lay back on his pillows. Perhaps a maximum of 2 and a half hours of sleep if he was lucky.
Setting his glasses on his nightstand, Kyoya rolled over to face the wall and closed his eyes.
Show me a smile then
Don’t be unhappy
Can’t remember when
I last saw you laughing
This world makes you crazy
And you’ve taken all you can bear
Just call me up
‘Cause I will always be there
“Kyoya! Are you even listening to me?” Tamaki waved his hand in front of Kyoya’s face.
Kyoya jumped, not realizing he had begun to doze. The lunchroom was nearly empty, save a few students from their class who had the same idea about coffee before their later classes.
Kyoya blinked and glanced down at the lukewarm cup in front of him. He had barely touched it, too focused on trying to keep his eyes open. He watched as Tamaki’s expression changed from annoyance to concern.
“Kyoya?” Tamaki sat as he had been standing while explaining some outlandish plan for some Western cosplay idea of his. Kyoya hadn’t really been listening, so he wasn’t sure.
Tamaki placed a gentle hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Hey, are you ok? Is it your dad? Did he say something this morning?”
Tamaki had been witness to one of Yoshio’s outbursts and knew full well the severity of his actions toward his sons. He hoped it would have died down by now, but he could tell that it was far from over. The bags under Kyoya’s eyes and the slump of his shoulders spoke volumes of the state of the normally cool and collected Shadow King.
Kyoya realized he hadn’t answered his friend and shook his head to clear it of the cobwebs. He could feel the headache coming back. If he wasn’t careful, it could turn into a migraine and that would not be good for the Host Club activities planned for the afternoon.
“Sorry, Tamaki. No, I didn’t see my father this morning. I just didn’t get much sleep last night.” He tried and failed to give Tamaki a small smile. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. Now, what were you saying about this cosplay idea of yours?”
Tamaki wasn’t convinced. He could see right through Kyoya; he could read his friend like a book. Right now, the page said that Kyoya was not fine. Tamaki would not allow this to go on unaddressed.
“Now you listen to me Kyoya. I am the president of the Host Club and I hereby pull rank on you.”
Kyoya raised an eyebrow.
Well, this is a first.
“I order you to go straight home after school and get some proper rest. No Host Club duties for you today, Mommy.”
Kyoya’s eyes widened. This was a definite first. He hardly ever missed attending the club, and never at Tamaki’s request. He must really look awful.
“Are you sure? I’d hate to disappoint my clients and leave the rest of you high and dry.”
“Ah ah ah. None of that now. Your king has spoken.” Tamaki’s expression took on a seriousness very rarely seen as he looked Kyoya in the eyes. “I mean it, Kyoya. You’ve got to take better care of yourself. When we graduate and go off to university, I won’t always be there to remind you of that. Sure, I’ll always be a phone call away, but we won’t see each other every day. With how your father has been… You deserve some time off. Please, you owe it to yourself.”
Taken aback by his normally boisterous friend’s serious tone, Kyoya can’t help but crack a smile. The absurdity of this situation is too much for him. That combined with the lack of sleep causes a laugh to bubble up out of his chest. The sound, though not new, is shocking yet refreshing for Tamaki to hear. He can’t hold himself back. His laughter joins Kyoya’s and the two friends draw the attention of the few students in the lunchroom.
The sight of Kyoya Ootori laughing openly was practically unheard of. That Suoh must be a wizard or something.
And I see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
Kyoya entered his home, his feet dragging. He put a hand on his head, eyes squeezing shut. Yup, definitely a migraine now.
Kyoya couldn’t wait to change into some sweats and lay down. He’d have to ask the staff for an ice pack. There should be some leftover aspirin in his medicine cabinet. Lost in thought, Kyoya didn’t notice a pair of eyes watching him trudge toward the stairs.
“Ahem.” Kyoya paused on the fourth step, schooling his features as he turned and met the steely gaze of his father. How the man was on the step next to him so fast was unexplainable. That didn’t bother Kyoya, though. No. What bothered him was the set of his father’s shoulders and the barely restrained rage radiating off of him.
Something must have really set him off.
Not wanting to irritate the man further, and not really feeling up to snuff at the moment, Kyoya inclined his head. “Afternoon, father. I was just heading up to get ahead on some of my schoolwork.”
He didn’t want to lie, but he knew the truth would have dire consequences. Yoshio Ootori was not a fan of slacking off.
“You did not stay to spend time with that ridiculous Host Club of yours? Did you and Suoh have a falling out? I hope not, Kyoya. You know how important a connection to the Suoh family is to the Ootori group.”
Kyoya clenched his fist around the strap of his bookbag. After the night he had, it took some serious effort not to offer a nasty retort to that. He somehow kept his cool as he replied, “No, father. It has nothing to do with Tamaki. I simply wish to spend the afternoon in my room. Alone.” He placed subtle emphasis on the word alone so his father would get the hint.
“Alone?” Oh crap. “How dare you take that tone with me! I asked you some very simple questions that merely required simple answers. And yet, you speak to me as if I were a child. I have worked too hard for too long for one of my sons to treat me this way. You are out of line, Kyoya! I have half a mind to ground you another week!”
Yoshio was red in this face, hands clenched into fists and shaking slightly. Kyoya knew better than to poke the bear. He knew. But he just couldn't help himself.
“No, you are out of line!” Kyoya snapped at his father. He had never done that before. It felt…good. He glared at his father, sleepless nights and early mornings fueling his anger; they clouded his better judgment. Kyoya couldn’t care less.
“You have done nothing but belittle me and give negative remarks about everything that I do! Nothing is good enough for you! I’m not good enough for you! I don’t know what I did or what happened at work to cause you to treat me so harshly as of late, but it stops now! I am close enough to graduation that I can make my own decisions and I don’t have to stick around to take your cruelty anymore! I-”
SMACK!
Kyoya’s glasses went flying. His head turned to the side and his body followed suit. He lost his balanced and tumbled down the four steps to the floor. His shoulder took the brunt of the impact, smarting painfully. His father…had slapped him.
Kyoya laid there on the floor, too tired to get up. His head was pounding, and his shoulder now hurt. He knew there would be a mark on his face but did not dare move to feel it. Not with his father steps above him, scrutinizing his moment of vulnerability.
Instead of further reprimand, his father turned and ascended the stairs. He disappeared from sight. Kyoya sighed and felt a firm hand on his arm. He flinched and found the concerned yet angry eyes of Tachibana. Nearly melting in relief, Kyoya allowed Tachibana to help him sit up.
He somehow wound up on the couch in his room, school clothes discarded and ice packs everywhere. He couldn’t remember changing into loungewear or receiving the ice packs, but he was grateful for the quiet and solitude. He knew his loyal bodyguards would not allow any disturbances for the rest of the night.
Kyoya picked up his phone from the cushion beside him and checked his messages. All the hosts were checking in on him. As he read their kind and silly messages, he found himself shaking. His friends… They cared about him. These people he dressed up in cosplay and went on outrageous vacations with were closer to him than his own family.
A drop landed on the screen. Kyoya hadn’t realized he was crying, but now he couldn’t stop. He was overwhelmed by his friends’ love for him. Love… Such an emotion still felt foreign to him at times. Sometimes he forgot that love was a normal feeling for people. Just not for him. He was getting used to it, thanks to the idiots he chose to spend so much time with.
Rubbing his eyes so he could see the blurry screen, Kyoya sent a message to the group.
Kyoya: Anyone up for a trip this weekend?
He smiled as his phone dinged multiple times.
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
I see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
As the group stepped out of the car and onto the beach, Honey, Mori, and the twins raced toward the water. They came already dressed in their swimsuits, merely tossing their shirts on the sand as they ran.
Haruhi stepped out, less enthused than the others but still smiling. She carried a beach bag and made her way to a setup of chairs under an umbrella. After sitting, she dug into her bag and pulled out a book. Leave it to Haruhi to prefer reading to playing in the ocean.
Tamaki stepped out next, shielding his eyes from the sun with a smile on his face. The weather was perfect. No locals intruding on their outing. No fawning girls to break the tranquility. All things the doctor ordered. Turning back to the open door, Tamaki smiled.
“Come on out, mon ami. It’s a perfect day.”
Kyoya sighed and stepped out of the car. He opted for prescription sunglasses over his usual pair. Truthfully, his old pair was ruined after the fall and his backup pair did not have his full prescription. He ordered a new pair to match his previous set but would have to wait another day. Something to do with the manufacturing or whatever. Kyoya didn’t mind.
He surveyed his family’s private beach, watching as Honey and Mori snorkeled in the shallow end. Hikaru shot a water gun at Kaoru, laughing when his brother got a face full of water. Then Hikaru ran as Kaoru gave chase. The twins’ laughter disrupted Haruhi, who paused in her reading to chastise them for being so loud. Her remark earned her matching smirks and water guns pointed at her. In exchange for keeping her book dry, Haruhi had no choice but to remove her clothes to reveal her one-piece swimsuit that the twins insisted she wear. She joined them in the water and laughed when Honey splashed her.
Kyoya smiled. Yes, this is just what the doctor ordered.
Touching his cheek, he couldn’t help but wince. Explaining what happened to his friends was a lot harder than he had anticipated. The looks of anger and shock on their faces almost set Kyoya to crying again, but he held it together. He couldn’t let that happen, not when all he needed was a distraction from his problems.
Tamaki touched his shoulder, causing Kyoya to wince. Tamaki drew his hand back, guilt on his face. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to-”
Kyoya shook his head and cut the blonde off midsentence. “It’s fine. Let’s go join the others before they force us. I need to get into the water.”
Tamaki nodded and the two friends headed toward the chairs. They discarded their shirts and shoes, then made their way to the shore. All the hosts paused and stared at Kyoya, finally taking in the severity of his injuries.
The bruise on his cheek was a deep purple, a faint outline of a hand barely visible. That they already saw. What made them pause now was the garish discoloration of his right shoulder.
Kyoya rolled his eyes, glad the sunglasses hid the motion. These idiots. Why stop their fun to gawk at him? To lighten the mood and get everyone to stop staring at him, Kyoya kicked some water at Tamaki.
The blonde blinked and grinned devilishly. Oh, it was so on.
Thus ensued a large splash war among the Host Club that transcends history.
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
Like a rainbow
After about an hour of play, Kyoya found himself sitting on a towel under the umbrella. Fruity drink in hand, the raven-haired young man watched as his friends continued to frolic along the shore.
To his right, he could see Honey and Mori collecting shells. Kyoya couldn’t help but smile, remembering how much his small senpai enjoyed the activity. He made sure there were plenty of shells to find with a wide variety.
To the front and in the water were Hikaru and Karou boogie boarding. They did so flawlessly, laughing maniacally when Tamaki failed spectacularly. The clumsy host got a face full of sand for his attempt. Kyoya chuckled softly. Leave it to that idiot to try something that requires balance and not even come close to succeeding.
Kyoya felt the towel shift beside him. “Enjoying yourself, senpai?” Kyoya turned to see Haruhi sitting beside him. The young lady, actually looking feminine for once in her swimsuit, tucked her legs beneath her as she tilted her head at him.
Kyoya smiled. “Yes, I am.” He held out his drink. “Care for a refreshment, Haruhi?”
A bit taken aback by the kind gesture, Haruhi hesitated before accepting the cup and sipping the concoction. “Thank you, Kyoya-senpai.”
Kyoya returned his attention to the ocean, visibly relaxing at the tranquility of the atmosphere. Though his eyes were obscured by the sunglasses, it was obvious his gaze softened as he watched his friends enjoying themselves.
Seeing Kyoya so relaxed and not writing in his black book was a rarity, even for his friends. Haruhi couldn’t help but touch his arm to recapture his attention.
“Senpai?”
“Kyoya.”
“Hm?”
Kyoya quirked an eyebrow. “Just Kyoya, please, Haruhi. I figure we are past formalities at this point.”
Shocked, Haruhi sat up straighter and looked hard at Kyoya. “Ok…Kyoya. I was just wondering… How- How are you doing? Truly. I know you told us how bad things have gotten but I feel like you haven’t been given the opportunity to express how you truly feel about it.”
The young man paused. He had not expected that question. Well, he supposed that if anyone were to ask that, it would be Haruhi. Or Tamaki, if the moron paused long enough to consider it. It took Kyoya a few moments to ponder the question. How did he feel? Was he upset by his father’s actions? A bit. Did his body hurt? Considerably. But that’s not what Haruhi was asking him.
“I suppose…I feel…relieved.”
“Relieved? I don’t understand. What could be relieving about your situation, Kyoya-se- Kyoya?”
Kyoya shrugged and returned his attention to the others. He noted that Honey had finished collecting and was building a sandcastle with Mori. The twins were doing their best to bury Tamaki in the sand, turning his lower half into a merman. The laughter floated toward the sitting pair and washed over Kyoya. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply through his nose.
“I am relieved because I do not need to keep up appearances here. When at school, I am the cool and intelligent Kyoya who is charming yet unapproachable. When at home, I am the dutiful and quiet youngest son. I do not step out of line, nor do I speak my mind.”
Kyoya turned back to Haruhi, a small yet genuine smile alighting his features. “When I am with my friends,” he paused when Haruhi’s eyes widened.
“I can be myself. I don’t have to pretend or act any specific way. I can let loose and do as I please.” Kyoya touched his cheek, wincing slightly at the sensitive area. “If it wasn’t for Tamaki becoming my friend in middle school, I would not have had the courage to be myself. I would not have become friends with the rest of you.”
Haruhi grabbed his hand and squeezed in reassurance. Kyoya smiled wider. “Despite who I am and what I have done, you all still believe in me. You do not give up on me and I really appreciate that.”
“Well we can see you, Kyoya. We see the real you and that’s the person we all love. You may present yourself as a dark, monochrome person to others, but not to us.” She smiled and released Kyoya’s hand as she watched their friends play. “We see your true colors, Kyoya. And they’re beautiful."