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Vriska and Meemah looked up the overstretching scene of fields- whoever memory this is sure had a fun time, with all these horses too. The slight wind blew through both of them and Vriska grabbed Meenah's hand and drew a large smile on her face to her, then ran through the fields with her, laughing and giggling as they pranced in the tall grass, eventually tripping over each other and rolling down the ground on a big heap as they laughed together. Who said being dead had to suck? Getting up and exploring this barren memory, they took pleasure in each other's presence, hugging and kissing as the seemingly impossibly large fields kept expanding before their own eyes. Too bad it'll likely be over soon, how memories keep changing frequently was a bummer; the key was to make the most of it while it lasted.
When the two calmed down, they sat down on some rocks, Meenah setting down the red box she had been carrying around with her. She says it's important, so she keeps it close to her at all times. Both stared outward at their dream-like memory together. Meenah's smile she had put on slowly faded into a content look, but Vriska still kept hers. But there's something she just couldn't shrug off.
Vriska has been dating this girl for some time, known her for longer and it seemed like an amazing match. They were basically two peas in a pod, but there just seemed to be something... askew about this whole thing, and she couldn't put her finger on it. They were definitely dating, that's for sure, but maybe it didn't feel like dating. It was something new: with Terezi they were simply morials with a love of being in character, but with Meenah it was love, wasn't it? It's not like she could compare it with something else- she knew she didn't love Tavros; it was just a phase, so it had to be love. But that's the thing, love seemed so, well, lovey-dovey, but with her, it just seemed like they're friends but more. Unless that was what love was? Fuck this was too confusing for her, she couldn't understand her own feelings very well it was a jumble of crashing emotions cascading into each other, and she was sitting in the middle.
What is love?
Vriska's smile evaporated from her as she now looked solemnly around. Her feelings were contradicting and she felt hollow and angry for some reason. This isn't fair! She was dating a girl she loved and she still felt unfulfilled. Was she not putting enough effort into it? Was Meenah not the one for her? God the questions she had to ask made her on the verge of wanting to vomit. She trembled as she sat there, trying her hardest to keep it together. She wanted so badly to scream but she needed to look good for Meenah.
")(ey babe what the fuck is you doin?"
"IM FINE OK THIS IS JUST REALLY SWEET DONT MIND ME" She shouted, closing her eyes and facing away. She felt like pure shit why the fuck is this happening right now?
"vris. vriska. look at me. come on i wont bite. whats wrong? its ok..." In Vriska's head she groaned. Why was she being nice to her? She hated it when she was being nice to her all sweetly it made her feel awful.
"Dont do that! I h8 it when you do this! it makes me feel so 8ad a8out myself!!!!!!!! Stop 8eing so n8ce to me why the fuck 8re you doing that????????" she said looking at her with a sad face. She didn't know what to feel because everything was backwards now.
Meenah looked at her shocked. She wasn't prepared for this. She didn't know how to handle this. This is totally out of her area because she loved Vriska, but she would be lying if she said she didn't want to cut the fluff and be doing something cooler...
"I. I just dont know Meenah. Th8s d8esn't feel right. I don't kn8w what to feel anymore ::::(" she said, defeated by herself. Why the fuck was she being so weak with her? This is making her look so fucking pathetic. Vriska bursts into tears, and a light blue watery stream drowns out her eyes as she sobs, pulling her knees up to her chest and hugging her legs into a ball. Meenah just looked at her uncomfortably and kinda edged away from her. She really had no clue what to even do, but she slowly extends her arm to kinda hug her back but she's shrugged off.
"vriska. whats wrong? im here for you, i don't wanna sea you cry... just tell me whats wrong and ill kelp with you." she says in a quiet voice. She started to feel terrible too- how can she be her girlfriend if she isn't even capable of helping her. This isn't what matesprits do: they help each other and she's not gonna sit here and be a bad matesprit.
"look. i dont wanna hear you ugly cry gill come on..."
"I d8nt know. I dont know why I'm cry8ng this d8esn't make any sens8..." Vriska whimpered alone. "It's hard, 8eing me and growing up, it's hard and no88dy 8nderstands."
"vriska i dont wanna sea you pike this. come on... what if someone seas you pike this?" Meenah didn't know how to deal with this other than almost threatening her with embarrassment. If it would work on her, it'd likely work on Vriska.
"I. Meenah. I don't know if I even love you- what if I'm convincing myself I love you 8ecaus8- 8ec8use I've 8een s8 lonely...?"
Meenah looked at her with a dumbfounded face, then washed over with a confused one. "the fuck is you mean you dont love me we are literally dating. is everyfin that we haddock been doing just for nauthin?" she gets up and shakes Vriska, practically shouting at her in an angered voice; she was up with putting in pleasantries.
"Look I dont KNOW OK???????? I'm just trying to understand this whol8 thing: I haven't d8d someone for real 8efor8!!!!!!!!"
"W)(AL-E YOU DONT JUST GO ON AND BAIT A GILL PIK-E T)(AT W)(AT T)(-E FUCK VRIS W)(Y DIDNT YOU T-ELL M-E B-EFOR-E" Meenah screamed at the top of her lungs, waving her hands in the air dramatically, looking down at the sobbing mess Vriska has become. No one disses the Peixes, did she really think she'd get away with it?
Vriska got up, rubbing the streams of tears from her face and (barely) could see Meenah with her hateful eyes staring right into her. "your tattoo- why the fuck did i give it to such a loser?" and she gave Vriska a hard push, sending her backwards over the rock she had been sitting on and onto the grass below. Vriska let out a big whimper and then looking up, screamed back: "FUCK YOU MEENAH. I TRY OPEN MY HEART TO YOU AND YOU CALL ME A WIGGLER???? YOU WERE THE ONLY PERSON WH8 I COULD REL8 TO AND THIS IS WH8T I G8T????" she pulls herself up and lunges at Meenah and starts to beat in her head with her fists while still blubbering like a baby. Meenah tries to fight back but she can't win against the onslaught of attacks she's receiving, so she tries to pull her o the side by wrapping her legs around her body and pulling her weight on top of her. Now Meenah was the one beating Vriska but after some gut punches she was forced off her and now was trying to get a gasp of air. Vriska got up behind her and got Meenah into a chokehold, squeezing her throat with her arm from behind. "FUCK YOU. YOU FISHY WHORE." She screamed as she put more effort into beating her. The horses that had been around them had already galloped away, leaving but one human-like figure watching on in the distance, their eyes sadly having to bear witness to this pathetic fight, then with an exhausting walk, made their way down to them before waiting for them impatiently for them to stop the cat fight.
"Hey. Do you idiots mind if I just take the 8ox? Watching you guys is just so painful, considering myself is getting her ass 8eat." Both snapped their heads to Vriska, who now stood bored by them before she reached down and just picked up Meenah's box.
"I honestly can't 8elieve in for an altern8 version of myself, can 8e such a failure."
")(-EY! this is OUR fight and MY box so will ya just bug out" she got untangled from (Vriska) and stood face-to-face with the "real" Vriska, but she wasn't looking good, with all the bruises and crying she's been through, and places her palms on the box and tried to steal it back. Pretty funny when both are Thieves, hm? Vriska pulled back and Meenah pulled back too. None were wanting to give this up, while (Vriska) laid defeated on the floor, her head slightly tilted to them both, bleeding.
"Hey genius, I need this to kill LE, it's just your jo8 to give it to me, so go it."
"ay right. I was wonderin when I get some real fighting around here, Im all for it" She looked back at (Vriska) for a moment before speaking again. "this whole love life shtick just wasnt up my alley, so screw with it, lets krill some nerd!"
(Vriska) spat out blood towards her, shakily rising up and coming back: "You're just mad cause you have no one to d8."
"you JUST cried because you realised you didnt love me."
"I DO LOVE YOU. 8 JUST DONT LIK8 IT WH8N Y8U..." she trailed off for a second, almost embarrassed to say the rest, but mustering the rest of her courage, she spat the words out with full intent.
"I just don't like it when you love me 8ack..."
Both of them looked back at (Vriska), Meenah with concern, while Vriska with a saddened face. For she knew what she meant.
"I just want the 8ox, and I'll leave. You 8oth can come to fight English, I'm sure neither of you wants to live after this. So this'll 8e your only chance to die." And with that, she walked away, going the way she came, box in hand. Meenah watched her walk the whole way out of sight, then one final look back to (Vriska), she takes a deep breath, and follows Vriska.
"... Why can't I just 8e a normal troll...?"