Work Text:
Atsushi Nakajima sat under the stary night, where the stars seemed to stare at him, and every time they twinkled was either a small giggle or laugh, maybe making fun of him, or maybe enjoying itselves with his company, he didn't know.
Before him laid the giant ocean, its waves crashing against the shore while dim lights reflected on its surface, and he was sure he saw a few boats in the distance, yellow lights glowing in the middle of the infinite night.
For Atsushi, nights like these were the most cherished. Moments of quietness in which he could finally get a few hours for himself, and he didn't have to bother to keep up appearances with anyone. He could sob loudly and let his eyes water freely if he wanted to, or he could giggle to himself or laugh out loud if he felt like it. There was no one around, only him, the ocean, the sky, and Yokohama's cold but somewhat comforting ambient.
He hummed a song to himself, and he closed his eyes, slowly feeling the sea breeze brushing his skin, and the way it tickled against his face. He smiled lightly.
"Double suicide... ♪ hm... ♪ " he mumbled to himself, quoting Dazai's original song, tilting his head to the side while doing it. "You can't do it alone... ♪♪ " he continued, not being able to keep it off his head after hearing it all day.
He sighed, and opened his eyes once again, staring at the same exact scenery he had looked upon just a few seconds earlier, and he hugged his legs closer to his chest.
"I wonder if Dazai-san will ever kill himself..." he said out loud, quietly hiding his face in between his legs. Saying those words out loud made his stomach turn in an uncomfortable way, so he decides to push those thoughts back to where they came from. He would deal with them... just... later...
He shook his head to himself, and once again, Atsushi stared at the stars above his head, blinking slowly while admiring their beauty. He could recall earlier today that Kunikida had bought a new pillow for the Agency's rest room, it was a cheap pillow he had bought on the convenient store, and it quoted a cheesy quote, something like "reach for the moon and you'll fall between stars", He laughed softly when he was reminded of how Dazai mocked Kunikida for being 'such a mom' and how Kunikida had replied flustered that he was just 'taking care of the Agents so that they do their best at work'
(No one really believe him, but nobody could tell him that considering how cute he looked when he was embarrassed)
He'd heard people say that they should dream for the stars, kids at his orphanage would often tell stories about how the sky was a sign of hope. How they should always wish for the stars.
Atsushi sighed, and threw his head back, closing his eyes. Stupid ...
He jolted silently when quiet steps approached his location. He slowly opened his eyes and turned his eyes, his mouth widening when he recognized the figure calmly approaching him, his steps quiet but unbelievably recognizable for Atsushi's keen hearing.
"What are you doing here?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. The figure stared back, and huffed.
"I don't feel the need to explain anything to you, weretiger," Akutagawa Ryuunosuke said, the nickname slipping through his lips with a sense of familiarity. Atsushi hummed in response.
Akutagawa and himself had never had a simple relationship. Sure. They'd tried to kill each other a couple of times, and of course, they knew each other's weaknesses and strengths like the back of their hand, but it wasn't anything worth naming.
They'd grown to each other, in more ways than one, and sometimes Atsushi would get sleepless nights by his side, and know every inch of his skin, memorizing even just the scent of his skin, and even a side that no one else had ever seen before. But it wasn't worth naming, he supposes.
"Well, I am here often, and I had never seen you before," Atsushi shrugged, returning his gaze to the horizon. "Can't I wonder the reason behind your presence?"
Akutagawa didn't answer, only quietly standing behind Atsushi's lonely figure. "Well, what are you doing here?"
Atsushi chuckled lightly. "I don't feel the need to explaining myself to you, Akutagawa. " Atsushi quoted lightly with a slight smile. Akutagawa rolled his eyes.
"Could you be any more childish?" He asked, but Atsushi's smile only widened.
"Easily." He replied, tilting his head without bothering on looking back at Akutagawa. "But to be fair, you started it."
"See? Childish. No adult would say something like 'you started it'" Akutagawa said, slowly lowering himself and sitting beside Atsushi, the cold ocean breeze brushing his skin while the wet sand got uncomfortably I between his fingers.
Atsushi chuckled softly. "The amount of times I've heard Dazai-san speak those words, though..." he muttered, and Akutagawa only shook his head.
"He doesn't count." Akutagawa was quick to add, and Atsushi frowned lightly.
"Why doesn't he? He is an adult, right?" Atsushi asked.
"But it's Dazai-san."
"Still an adult."
Akutagawa scoffed, and shook his head, silently giving up, but definitely not agreeing with Atsushi, who only shrugged with a silent smile, claiming victory over their argument.
The night was silent from humans for a few seconds, only the forces of nature like the ocean or the wind daring to interrupt its calmness, and Atsushi couldn't help but to shiver lightly over the beauty of the quietness of it, forgetting for a second the entire city that sat behind him, with its busy streets and even busier habitants.
"Can I ask you something?" Atsushi interrupted the silence, tilting his head to the side while staring at Akutagawa, who kept his eyes up front, almost like they were in a mission to stare at the dark sea; Akutagawa didn't answer, but hummed lightly. "Well, is more like a story... I-I just want to know what you think... kinda..."
"Ask away, weretiger, I don't have all day." Akutagawa spoke, rolling his eyes but never crossing glances with Atsushi.
"You know how people are always like... " aim for the stars " and such, right?" Atsushi asked, nervously tapping his leg. Akutagawa blinked a couple of times, and finally, slowly turned his head.
"Where is that coming from?" He asked, an eyebrow raised. "Have you finally lost your mind?"
Atsushi felt his cheeks blush and he shook his head, with a small pout. "N-No, no, l-listen!" Atsushi complained. "I was thinking how stupid that is... it doesn't make sense."
" Stupid?" Akutagawa repeated. "Not what I was expecting. You seem like the kind to like cheesy quotes and childish games."
"Hey!" Atsushi exclaimed, crossing his arms. "Listen. Why should people aim for the stars? I don't get it."
Akutagawa hummed. "Ambition, I suppose."
"But no one can ever take the stars, no matter how hard they work... It's a stupid metaphor." Atsushi explained. Akutagawa stared quietly at him for a few seconds, before smirking lightly.
"How philosophical can you get?"
"But I'm right, " Atsushi insisted. "It's impossible to aim for the stars... it should be something more viable, but not stars."
"It seems that your mind gave this trivial matter a lot of thought," Akutagawa spoke, not sounding very impressed by Atsushi's words, but he was definitely paying them attention. "I wonder why...?"
"Because it doesn't make sense! It should be... I don't know! " Aim for... greatness? Power? Oh, how about love ...?"
Akutagawa frowned lightly, and shook his head. "That's even more cheesy, weretiger." He said with a grimace that made Atsushi laugh lightly.
"But it's more plausible!"
"Sounds stupid."
"So does " aim for the stars “so it doesn't really matter. Does it?"
Akutagawa only sighed, and shrugged with a tired expression. "So determined..." he muttered.
Atsushi smiled lightly, and threw his head back, humming a song to himself. " Aim for love ..." he murmured to himself, nodding softly. "I like it."
"Stupid..." Akutagawa thought out loud, and Atsushi only huffed, laying down on the sand.
" You're stupid." He smirked. Akutagawa's eyebrow twitched and he hummed.
"Never thought I would be having this kind of conversation with you... or ever."
"Why not? I'm right," Atsushi stated as if it was factual, confidently closing his eyes, feeling the sand getting in between his hair, and thinking about how difficult it would be to wash it off tomorrow. "This is my place, anyway, I get to choose the topic." He added.
Akutagawa didn't bother answering, and only quietly stared at Atsushi's relaxed figure. His hair was messy against the sand, and his shirt was untucked and a few buttons undone, he wasn't wearing his usual suspenders or his tie, giving him an unprofessional look, which lightly amused Akutagawa.
Atsushi started smiling softly, and before Akutagawa could ask why he was smirking, he was pulled down by Atsushi who trapped him in between his limbs with a loud laugh.
"W-What—" Akutagawa jolted, surprised, both of his arms immobilized by Atsushi's restrain.
"Come here, Akutagawa~!" Atsushi laughed loudly, trying to force Akutagawa to lay down next to him on the sand.
"Let me go!" Akutagawa ordered, fighting against Atsushi with the intention of freeing himself from his tight grip. "I don't want to get dirty with sand! Weretiger, I swear to God—"
Atsushi could barely hear Akutagawa's complains and orders over his laughter. He loudly tightened his grasp over Akutagawa's clothes, who tried to push him away, disrupting their balance and managing to fall under his entire weight, laying down completely on top of the sand.
Atsushi's hands were on Akutagawa's chest as he leaned over, a brimming smile on his face, while Akutagawa laid down with a defeated expression. The two of them were panting after their small brawl and their loud breaths seemed to disrupt the dullness of the calm scenery around them.
"Get off me." Akutagawa sighed, and Atsushi shook his head, still panting. Akutagawa stared at him with an eyebrow raised, but Atsushi only stared back, without any clear intention of letting Akutagawa go.
"Move me yourself." Atsushi giggled, sticking out his tongue in a childish matter.
"I will use Rashomon," Akutagawa warned, but Atsushi only yawned, leaning down and slowly resting his head on Akutagawa's chest, who rolled his eyes. "A cat. That's what you are. A big, annoying, overgrown cat."
Atsushi only hummed lightly. "It had been a while since I last saw you." he spoke, not bothering on refusing Akutagawa's statement.
"Oh?" Akutagawa asked. "What about it? Did you miss me?" He spoke, a mocking smile on his lips, almost waiting for Atsushi to deny it immediately.
"A bit." Atsushi answered honestly, hiding his face on Akutagawa's chest, who opened his eyes wide.
"I see..." he murmured.
Atsushi's arms relaxed by Akutagawa's sides, who quietly gave up on trying to get as least dirty as possible as he finally let the serene and surprisingly mundane and domestic environment take over him, resting his head on the ground and humming.
"You're heavy, have you been eating?"
"Shut up..."
"You're the one trapping me here..." Akutagawa complained him, his arms raising slowly and settling quietly under Atsushi's arms.
"You could easily push me away..." Atsushi reminded him, and to this, Akutagawa didn't say anything. Atsushi raised his head slowly, and connected glances with Akutagawa, a small smile on his lips. "I will start aiming for love." He spoke, almost like a silent promise, and he closed his eyes, once again relaxing against Akutagawa's body.
Akutagawa blinked a couple of times, and stared slowly at Atsushi's silver hear and pale skin, quietly caressing his arms while breathing his scent. He smiled softly, and shook his head lightly.
"That's cheesy."
"Shut up, just enjoy the silence for a change…”
And for once, Akutagawa did.