Chapter Text
It was early in the day, the sounds of disciples chatting and laughing could be heard in the distance. It was a free day for the peak lord of Qing Jing, so of course he’d take this chance to relax for once.
Laying in his bed, Shen Qingqiu could feel the warmth of the sun, making its way into his room through the slightly open window. A light breeze would move the translucent white curtains of his canopy bed around a little, letting some of the cool air pass through occasionally. On days like these, he found himself wanting something or someone to cuddle.
Even though he had many pillows and even a long one, which was basically a body pillow, it was still not enough. He just wanted a person who’d hold him in their arms.
At this point, he didn’t care if it were a man or a woman, he'd even cuddle someone he hated. But, he’d never admit this to anyone else, unless…
Shen Qingqiu pushed the thought of cuddling with Liu Qingge to the back of his head, at least, he tried to push the thought away. “Shameless…” he mumbled to himself, pinching his arm to attempt at getting rid of this desire, but it only made him want to cuddle the one on his mind even more.
Since the image wouldn’t leave his mind, he decided to get up and distract himself by going on a mission. He’s been having these thoughts for a few days, or a while, now. At first Shen Qingqiu thought it was because of that day Liu Qingge caught him when he was attacked by a beast. He hadn’t seen the thing coming his way since he was focused on arguing with the war god, they were on a mission together. The beast snuck up behind Shen Qingqiu and rammed into his back at full force. He thought he’d hit the rock that was in front of him, but Liu Qingge surprisingly went and caught him before he hit his head with the excuse that it’d be inconvenient to deal with a brain-damaged snob.
Although he was insulted and they continued to argue after killing the beast, Shen Qingqiu couldn’t stop thinking about how it felt to be in the arms of another. He never hugged anyone in the past or present, aside from the women at the brothels he visited. He never went there for anything sexual, all he’d ever do was have tea with the women, listen to music that’d be playing or lay on a woman’s lap. He wouldn’t go any further, he simply admired them and didn’t want to do anything more than have some company to get his mind off things.
The reason why he wasn’t going this time was because he already went to his favourite brothel recently and still thought of how Liu Qingge’s biceps felt during his time there. So he was going to do something different to hopefully free himself from these hidden desires.
Shen Qingqiu slowly and gracefully raised himself to sit on his bed. He inhaled and exhaled for a moment to wake himself up a bit more, smelling something pleasant. It was left from the tea he had drank last night. He got off his bed and got ready, getting dressed and having a light breakfast to give himself some energy for the day.
As he exited his bamboo hut and walked down a path, he saw his head disciple passing by, along with some other disciples. They bowed and greeted their master, so he took this chance to put Ming Fan in charge while he was off the peak. His head disciple tried to hide his enthusiasm as he thanked his master.
Shen Qingqiu dismissed them and went on his way. He didn’t want to deal with the sect master, so he went to Qian Cao peak. Maybe the sect doctor would want him to get some medical herbs or something of the sort?
Pulling out his sword and getting on, he made his way to the peak in hopes of getting a mission from Mu Qingfang. Once he got there and went into the doctor’s office, he wasn’t expecting to see the one who’d been on his mind as of late, but it wasn’t uncommon for Liu Qingge to be there. The war god was a reckless brute in Shen Qingqiu’s eyes. The odd thing about this was that he wasn’t hurt, in fact, it seemed like Mu Qingfang had called Liu Qingge over to talk about something.
Mu Qingfang, who had been sitting at his low table and drinking tea with Liu Qingge, had noticed Shen Qingqiu enter almost immediately. “Ah, Shen-shixiong, what brings you here?” the doctor asked as he got up. Liu Qingge stayed seated while drinking his tea and paying no attention to Shen Qingqiu, this was normal for the two if they weren’t giving each other dirty looks or arguing.
“Mu-shidi” Shen Qingqiu greeted Mu Qingfang, he wasn’t spiteful towards him since the other wasn’t judgemental towards him or rude, he was a professional doctor after all. “I was simply looking for something to do, I did not expect for the brute to be here, and uninjured, how surprising” he continued with a sarcastic tone after the first bit.
Liu Qingge slammed his cup onto the table after finishing it, it wasn’t strong enough to break the cup, but still loud. “Says the one who fools around in brothels” he said with a glare directed towards the scholar. Shen Qingqiu pulled out his fan and opened it, lightly fanning himself as he glared daggers back.
He was about to retort but Mu Qingfang walked in between the two to obscure their views of each other and to remind them where they were. “It’s perfect that you’ve come here, I was just talking to Liu-shixiong about a mission I’d like for him to go on” Mu Qingfang began. “I need certain plants with healing properties that are situated in a rather dangerous area, I’m sure with your insight and his strength, the two of you would get what I need easily” he finished, killing two birds with one stone.
The two in question looked at Mu Qingfang as if he were saying something absurd. “Go on a mission with him? I’ve had enough of this slut!” Liu Qingge yelled as he got up. “Slut?! You bastard! How dare you call me such a word!” Shen Qingqiu yelled back as he closed his fan and pointed at the other accusingly. Mu Qingfang stayed between the two and held out his arms in a way to say ‘calm down, no need to fight’. “Please, I don’t want my office to be ruined, I have valuable medicines and documents I don’t want to lose, save this for elsewhere” the doctor pleaded a bit before continuing, “I feel that the two of you would be able to do this, there are a few powerful beasts in the area in which Liu-shixiong could fight as he pleases, and Shen-shixiong, if you go on this mission and get the things I need, I’ll give you some books that aren’t in your library, I think they’re in your best interests”.
At this, Liu Qingge and Shen Qingqiu calmed down a bit, they seemed to have thought about it, the pros and the cons of this mission. “Pass me the list of plants you need” Shen Qingqiu said and he opened his fan back up in one smooth motion to lightly fan himself once again.
Mu Qingfang let out a small sigh of relief as it seemed like they weren’t going to fight, he complied. The scholar took the papers that were handed over to him and looked through them.
“Fine, I’ll go on the mission with him, come on shidi, let’s get this over with, the sooner it’s over, the better for us” Shen Qingqiu said as he stashed the papers away and began to exit the office, not waiting for the other. Liu Qingge huffed before following Shen Qingqiu, which relieved Mu Qingfang since they were gone and his office was spared.
________________________________________________
The two peak lords flew to the location Mu Qingfang had written down, it wasn’t too far away since they were flying. It would have taken much longer if they rode horses or went to the forest by carriage.
They did indeed encounter some powerful beasts as Mu Qingfang had mentioned. Shen Qingqiu let Liu Qingge deal with them since he didn’t feel like getting blood on his robes and the war god was very capable of defeating them on his own. He was always so jealous of how Liu Qingge never seemed to get his robes dirty and how his hair hadn’t a single hair out of place. The world was just too unfair, making the one who got the better life look so perfect.
As Liu Qingge was fighting another beast, a plant beast was sneaking up behind him, it was known as ‘fox-orchid of truth’. As the name said, it was some sort of plant creature that took on the shape of a fox and was made up of orchids. The thing wasn’t very hostile, but if it feels like its life may be in danger or if it sees something that would most likely kill it, it’ll spray the predator with a paralysing gas, which will render those who’ve inhaled the gas paralyzed for a few hours. After the paralysing effects wear off, those who are affected will then become honest against their will until all the toxins have passed. For a mortal, it’d take about 2 weeks or less to wear off, as for an immortal/cultivator, at least less than a week.
Even though Shen Qingqiu hates Liu Qingge with a burning passion, he wouldn’t want to fight off the other beasts they may come across and carry him around. As he watched the fox-orchid get slowly closer to the war god, he thought about the pros and cons of having a paralyzed Liu Qingge and found that there were more cons than pros.
Sighing, Shen Qingqiu ran up to Liu Qingge as he had just finished defeating the other beast and put his hand over his nose since it was too late to warn. The fox-orchid had already sprayed its gas, all Shen Qingqiu could do was hold his breath and pull Liu Qingge away from the gas. Unfortunately, what he didn’t know was that the beast will do what it can to make sure that its attackers or possible attackers would inhale the gas so that it could escape safely. This means, these beats have a card up their sleeve.
As the scholar pulled a flailing and angry war god away from the gas, he was then grabbed by the ankle with a vine that was coming from the fox-orchid of truth. He kept his mouth shut even though he would’ve gasped and pushed Liu Qingge far enough to be able to breathe without inhaling the gas. He pulled out his sword in a quick motion and cut the vine to escape, but then another one grabbed his other ankle and tripped him, causing him to exhale on impact and inhale on reflex.
The effects were immediate, he couldn’t move anymore. Liu Qingge, who was angry and confused as to why Shen Qingqiu did all that, now understood what had happened to a certain extent. He held his breath and killed the creature in one slash. Once he offed the creature, he went over to Shen Qingqiu and picked him up like picking up a sack of potatoes. This caused the scholar to yell profanities at him because of how he was being carried as he was brought far from the gas that was slowly dissipating. He already inhaled the stuff, so what’s a little more gonna do?
“Why’d you do that?” Liu Qingge asked in shock as he put the man down, leaning him against a tree. He was surprised Shen Qingqiu didn’t just let him breathe in the gas and leave him to be mauled by some beast that’d pass by or something.
Shen Qingqiu averted his eyes, “it’d inconvenient to carry you, and you look heavy” he said simply while scoffing a bit. Liu Qingge stared at him for a bit, as if trying to understand his reasoning, the man was strong as well and could probably carry him just as easily. He sighed, he probably would’ve done the same, despite hating the spiteful and aloof peak lord.
Feeling indebted, Liu Qingge put an arm underneath Shen Qingqiu’s legs and another behind his back. He let out a small gasp as he looked back at Liu Qingge. If he could move, he’d definitely be smacking the other with his fan. No one had ever picked him up like this in all his life, not that he remembers anyway, he doesn’t think anyone ever picked him up. Liu Qingge ignored the way Shen Qingqiu was glaring at him and stood up, unintentionally letting the scholar’s head rest onto his shoulder.
The proud and aloof peak lord was even more baffled, how scandalous and embarrassing this was! Having his enemy carry him like this and no way of protesting, shameless brute!
Despite the way he looked angry and spiteful towards Liu Qingge, he was reminded of how it felt to be in his arms. This time, he was even closer and can feel the warmth coming from the other. It was comfortable, to say the least.
Against Liu Qingge’s better judgement, Shen Qingqiu stayed silent as he was carried. He thought that this man would surely be cussing or yelling at him to be put back down. But it made sense in a way, he assumed his shixiong was silent because he figured there’d be no point in fighting and it’s better to go and find the plants together since he actually knows what they look like, unlike Liu Qingge.
His silence was not what Liu Qingge thought, though. He was silent because he was mentally battling himself, trying not to think about how he wants to cuddle the war god. Shen Qingqiu didn’t want to admit to it when the paralytic effects wore off.
________________________________________________
They eventually found the things Mu Qingfang wanted and Shen Qingqiu told Liu Qingge which ones to pick while he was being carried around. His face felt oddly warm every time he’d feel his face pressed against Liu Qingge’s chest or shoulder, possibly from the embarrassment of being carried.
Once they were done with gathering the plants and stashing them in Shen Qingqiu’s pouch, Liu Qingge mounted his sword with the man in his arms. He began to head back to Qian Cao peak to deliver the herbs.
The ride back was pretty awkward and Shen Qingqiu began to regain movement in his body midway.
As soon as they reached the peak, Shen Qingqiu freed himself from Liu Qingge’s arms. His face was a bit red but he made it look like it was from anger rather than mortification. He was glad not many saw this exchange and Liu Qingge walked into the doctor’s office like he wasn’t just carrying the person he hates. What Shen Qingqiu didn’t notice was that Liu Qingge’s ears had become red at some point.
“Welcome back, Liu-shixiong, Shen-shixiong” Mu Qingfang greeted them as they walked in. “We got what you wanted” Shen Qingqiu said vaguely as he quickly pulled out the pouch, feeling the truth serum that was mixed in the gas he breathed earlier. The doctor happily accepted the pouch and took a peek inside, seeing all the things he had asked for in it, he thanked his shixiongs. “I’m surprised you two came back so quickly, I thought you’d take longer to brawl a bit” Mu Qingfang said as he set the pouch aside to deal with when his guests left. Liu Qingge was about to respond but Shen Qingqiu, who was now fully under the effects of the truth gas, cut him to the chase.
“We would’ve if I hadn’t saved his a** from inhaling that damn gas from the fox-orchid of truth-”
He slapped a hand over his mouth to stop himself from continuing, he didn’t want to say anything more. Unfortunately for him, Mu Qingfang had already got the memo. “Shen-shixiong, you saved Liu-shixiong despite it being practically harmless?” he asked the scholar in shock and looked at Liu Qingge as if to ask if this was true. The war god, who had been standing there with his arms crossed, gave the doctor a curt nod.
The doctor seemed astounded for a moment before changing to an intrigued expression. “So you do care about your shidi?” Mu Qingfang asked, sounding a bit smug. Shen Qingqiu scoffed and was going to say “I do not, I’d rather him be dead”, but instead said “of course I do, he’s tolerable sometimes”. This caused him to place his hand back over his mouth.
Liu Qingge looked at him like he grew three heads, in utter shock. He knew the other wasn’t lying because he had heard about the plant beast and what it does to a person from the previous Bai Zhan peak lord. Shen Qingqiu exhaled sharply and walked out of the office, he didn’t want to be forcefully pried open, he didn’t like the feeling of not being in control of what he says.
Not too long after, Liu Qingge followed after him once he got over his initial shock. He followed Shen Qingqiu all the way to his bamboo hut. The scholar tried to close the door behind him but Liu Qingge put his foot between.
“Do you really feel that way about me?” Liu Qingge asked, even though he knew it was the truth, he needed to hear it again, to get it through his head. The two of them had been at each other’s throats for years, so to suddenly hear that the other doesn’t actually hate him to the point of not caring, it was a shock. Shen Qingqiu continued to try and close the door, but knowing that the other wouldn’t budge, he gave up on trying to close the door but continued to block his entrance.
He wanted to shake his head but nodded instead. He thought that if his words would betray him, then maybe his body wouldn't, but it also betrayed him. Liu Qingge’s jaw almost dropped as he watched. “Then, all this time…” He mumbled, not really looking for a response from the Qing Jing peak lord.
To his surprise, he got a response, the man seemed to have given up on staying silent, or maybe the effects had gotten stronger. “I never fully hated you, it would be a bit boring if you weren’t here” Shen Qingqiu said, managing to stop himself from saying more without using his hand to silence himself.
Liu Qingge looked at him for a moment before looking away a bit. “I guess I could say that I feel the same, I wouldn’t want to wish death upon you…” he mumbled a bit. The scholar stood there before relaxing a bit, maybe he can let the other in? Maybe he could lower his guard just a tad? He already admitted to caring about him.
Letting the poison of the gas take over, he backed up and let Liu Qingge in, and the man walked in like he had wanted to for the past few minutes.
________________________________________________
Shen Qingqiu had called Ming Fan to serve them tea, the poor disciple was shocked to see that his master’s guest was the one the man supposedly hated. He had served the tea and left quickly to give them space.
The two of them chatted for a bit, being honest about things and reminiscing about the past. They bickered a few times but it wasn’t as bad as their previous arguments. They got over the bickering rather quickly because of Shen Qingqiu being completely honest about his feelings, it wasn’t like he could stop it anyway. Surprisingly, Liu Qingge stayed over until the sky began to turn a bit orangey-pink.
As the other got up, Shen Qingqiu couldn’t help but want for him to stay over, wanting to be held once more. He was still relaxed from their previous chatter and the atmosphere was nice, his guard was down and he couldn’t stop the words from escaping his lips.
“I wish you’d grasp me again”
It was quiet and was more like he was thinking out loud to himself, but Liu Qingge still heard and stopped. This astonished Liu Qingge, he gazed at Shen Qingqiu, who’s face had become the reddest it had ever been, which wasn’t very red but it was noticeable. “I mean, I want you to hold me, no- wrap your arms around me, no- embrace-” Shen Qingqiu tried to defend but every time he tried to say something different, it would just make him dig an even bigger grave for himself.
He silenced himself and got up to escape, but Liu Qingge grabbed his arm. “Wait- that could… I could do that” he said while blushing as he stared deeply into Shen Qingqiu’s eyes, to show how genuine he was. Now it was Shen Qingqiu’s turn to be astonished, he wasn’t expecting this outcome, but it wasn’t unwelcome.
Two just stood there for a while, staring at the other with mixed emotions. Shen Qingqiu was the first to move as he freed his arm from Liu Qingge’s loose grip and began to clean up the table. “You can sit on my bed and wait for me” he said as he walked into his kitchen with the empty tea cups. He opted to just leave them for the morning since he really just wanted to cuddle with the man he hoped was waiting in his room. As he had thought this very morning, it would be a nice day to cuddle someone, anyone. He had been longing for this moment even though he wanted to deny it.
When he returned, it seemed that the war god had listened to him for once, and even took off his outer robes to not dirty the bed. A rare sight to see, for Shen Qingqiu. He took off his outer robes as well and folded them neatly, resting them on his table for now. He joined Liu Qingge on his bed and sat there awkwardly.
“I never thought this far…” the scholar mumbled without thinking. He was about to pull out his fan and cover his face but his fan was on the table with his folded outer robes. “You thought about it?” Liu Qingge asked, being the blunt person that he is. Shen Qingqiu looked away from him out of mortification. “Of course this shixiong has” he began quietly, “if I hadn’t been plagued with the thought of being held in your arms, I wouldn’t have said anything regarding it”.
He didn’t look at Liu Qingge, he felt as though his face was the colour of a tomato, even though his cheeks were probably just a bit red.