Chapter Text
Gloria sighed, hanging her apron up by the door as she finished locking up the cafe. It'd been another busy day, but hey, at least that actually benefited her pay now.
"Okay ,but seriously you own the cafe now, so why can't I just have one free muffin?" Cricket prodded as they walked the short distance to the house.
Gloria groaned. "Look if I happen to burn a batch tomorrow I'll let you have one, okay?"
"So what you're saying is I just have to ensure that'll hap-"
"No. Stop right there." Gloria swore this kid was chaos incarnate sometimes.
"Look it's almost dinner time anyway, you wouldn't want to spoil your supper would you?"
Cricket sighed as they climbed the porch steps and opened the front door. "I guess….-"
Both Cricket and Gloria's eyes abruptly widened at the sound of shouting coming from the kitchen.
"Careful woodpecker-"
"Would you relax, I've got it, now put some oven mitts down so I can let go."
Gloria curved her brow as she and Cricket walked into the kitchen, Bill and Tilly were already seated at the dinner table, whilst Gramma was busy maneuvering enough space in the center for Chip to sit the pan of green bean casserole down.
"Woah green bean casserole!" Cricket cheered as he hopped into the empty seat next to Tilly. "Aw yeah, my favorite!"
Gramma Alice sighed as Gloria swung her bag strap around the arm of her chair and sat down. "I didn't know if I should pick something simpler, but woodpecker over here insisted he could handle it."
Chip rolled his eyes as he sat down, tossing the oven mits to the adjacent counter. "That's because it's a casserole, not rocket science."
Gloria frowned. Yeah well first time she tried to make a green bean casserole her parents both got food poisoning so, yeah actually it kinda was.
So the artist deliberately chose to wait until Cricket had taken a bite.
The ten year old's eyes lit up like a pair of car headlights, then he dove back in for another bite.
Gloria pursed her lips, well okay ,but Cricket would eat a raw tire if you covered it with enough green beans.
And Gloria was sure everyone else was going back for seconds out of politeness.
"So how was work today Gloria?" Bill asked, as he took a sip of his water.
Gloria smiled. "Well it was actually-"
"You guys made muffins too?!" Cricket suddenly interrupted, swiveling in his chair to look at the muffin tray sitting at the edge of the counter.
"Cricket, what have we talked about inter-."
"Eh, booshie boy found some old mix at the back of the cabinet earlier." Gramma Alice shrugged.
"You have spiders by the way." Chip added nonchalantly as he looked at his phone.
"Spiders!" Bill gripped the edge of the table in fright whilst Tilly quickly leaned over to pet her father's shoulder.
"It's okay Papa, most spiders are friendly, remember?"
Gloria blinked. "Uh ,but yeah it was actually…" At that point she realized no one was really listening.
The crackle of her freshly opened Splish was like music to Gloria's ears as she walked into the living room, Patrick cozily nuzzled in the crook of her sweatshirt clad elbow and her popcorn wafting its buttery goodness into the air.
"Alright, hot blonde lawyer time." Gloria sang to herself as she sat down on the couch and pressed play on the dvd menu for Lawfully Blonde.
As soon as the trailers began to play though, Tilly happened to mozy in from the hallway, her head held down, and her arms strangely slouched.
"Oh hey Tils," Gloria placed her popcorn down on the coffee table. " I'm about to watch a chick flick, if you want you're free to join." Gloria patted the space next to her tantalizingly.
Tilly sniffled, then raised her head. Her cheeks were flushed, and her eyes were red from crying.
"S-sorry Gloria, I'm in the middle of a crisis." She raised Saxon up into the air, and gestured to the split seam along the doll's side where stuffing was leaking out. "Gramma's gone to bed already and I don't know what to do."
Gloria's brows dropped in sympathy. She got up from the couch and knelt down to Tilly's level. "Hey, hey, it's alright. I'll tell you what, I'll call your mom and maybe later she can swing by and fix Sax-"
"What's going on?"
Gloria fought the urge to roll her eyes as she looked over to see Chip standing behind them in his matching silk pajamas.
Before Gloria could tell him to buzz off, Tilly let out another sniffle. "I-I was locking the chicken coop and one of them got too close to Saxon, and now he's h-horrible injured!"
Chip frowned, arching his brow. "Looks like a simple tear to me, here let me," Barely asking for permission the blonde plucked Saxon from Tilly's grip and sat down, taking out a needle and some thread from the coffee table drawer as he started sewing the seam back together.
Tilly clasped her hands together desperately as she stood beside him. Less than a minute passed and Chip handed Saxon back over to Tilly. "There, all better."
Tilly's eyes lit up with relief as she pressed Saxon close to her chest. "Many thanks!"
Gloria sighed. Right,she forgot the jerk could sew. Still at least, Tilly wasn't crying anymore.
"Eh, don't mention it." Chip yawned as he stood back up, thank blort, he was leav-
"Gloria and I were about to watch a movie, would you like to join us Chip?" Tilly asked politely.
"Heh, that's nice Tils ,but he probably doesn't want to watch Lawfully Blonde it's really more of a-"
"Lawfully Blonde!?" Chip put a hand over his mouth, obviously to hide his momentary excitement. " I mean, pft I might've seen it once or twice."
Once or twice her butt.
Gloria crossed her arms in exasperation as Chip quoted line after line during the movie whilst his crossed legs laid propped up against the coffee table.
"Bell Forests Welcome to Harvard." "Bell Forests Welcome to Harvard."
At least when Patrick did it, it was cute.
The jerk even took the popcorn bowl, and of course that was why Tilly was sitting closer to him. Obviously.
"I'm not sure I like Bell's boyfriend." Tilly mused as she laid across the couch cushions, her head propped up by the side of Chip's leg. Chip shrugged, taking another bite of popcorn. "No one does, he's a total bonehead."
Gloria slouched further into the couch, her sulky frown only lightened when she felt Patrick climbing onto her shoulder. The artist sighed leaning her cheek against his as she rubbed his feathery little chest. "At least you still like me more." She mumbled.
Patrick tilted his head. "Squawk, bonehead." With that her parakeet spread his wings and flew over to Chip's side of the couch, landing comfortably in the former ceo's hair.
Unlike most times that happened, Chip didn't really seem to care now, generously offering the bird a nibble of popcorn even. Probably just to rub it in her face, the jerk.
Gloria was sure she was full on pouting at this point, sulking so far down into the couch cushions she was almost afraid she'd get lost down there.
"Traiter."
Gloria wasn't sure how her attempt at a landscape painting turned into a picture of someone's foot (definitely not hers) about to stomp a terrified little figure, 'vaguely' resembling a certain, blonde's silhouette.
"The muse, mysterious as ever." Gloria hummed to herself as she switched out another canvas, the air conditioner's gentle breeze calming her, as she soaked in the morning sun. It was rare she got a moment of peace to just sit and paint without Tilly and Cricket constantly hopping up and down around her.
Plus with no one else around to hear, she could finally vent some.
"...just a stupid, good for nothing, jerkface…"
"Who's a jerkface?"
Gloria jolted, whipping her head around to see Cricket and Tilly standing there, still in their pajamas.
"No one." Gloria sighed as she went back to her brush strokes. "What are y'all up to?"
Cricket shrugged. "Looking for Gramma, the pools finally open today and she said she'd take us while Dad's working the booth."
"Oh….uh, about that." Gloria gritted her teeth. "Alice left the house an hour ago, said she had a bingo emergency…whatever that means."
"What!" Cricket cried. "Aw man, we really wanted to go."
Gloria sighed again, already prepared for the inevitable, 'Will you take us Gloria?'.
And she was so ready for a, her day too.
"Wait a second brother, Saxon has an idea."
'Here it comes.' Gloria sighed again, closing her eyes as she swiveled around to face them.
"Look guys as much as I would 'love' to chaperone y'all, instead of enjoying the little alone time I get to enjoy nowadays,I really-"
Gloria trailed off, opening her eyes at the sound of retreating footsteps to see them both long gone.
"-can't…...huh" Gloria scrunched both brows together, taking a second to wallow in confusion before she eventually stood up and followed them.
She followed their voices, eventually ending up at Chip's open bedroom door. Gloria peaked inside the doorway to see Tilly kneeling next to Chip's sleeping face and gently jostling his shoulder.
The blonde groaned, not even bothering to open his eyes. "Whaaaaaaat?"
Cricket hopped onto the bed as well. "Will you take us to the pool please?"
Chip moaned, trying to hide under his pillow as he blindly tried to bat them away. "Whhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyy?"
"Because, Gramma said she would ,but she had a bingo emergency." Tilly answered. "And because Saxon's dying in this unbearable heat."
Tilly raised Saxon above her face as she faked a gruff accent. "Practically melting at this point."
Chip flipped himself over with a yawn, squinting his eyes in the morning light. "Do I have to?"
Gloria just barely reared back in time when, seconds later Chip was shuffling to his feet, Tilly and Cricket hanging off his shoulders like a jungle gym as he went to grab a cup of coffee.
"Bye Gloria, have fun with your alone time!" Cricket waved goodbye as he followed Tilly and Chip out the door. The front door then shut with a strange finality, leaving Gloria staring listlessly out the living room window as she watched everyone hop into Chip's car.
"They asked…Chip before they asked me….are. you. SERIOUS!" Gloria yelled to no one ,but herself as she threw her hands into the air.
"Squawk, serious."
"Not now Patrick!" Gloria shot back as she began to pace the living room. "It's like I'm in the twilight zone or something, a few months of not trying to destroy this family and all the sudden that creep's the favorite!?"
"Squawk, favorite!"
"What? Is it cause he's tall or something, he can reach things short ole Gloria can't! Are you kidding m-"
Gloria cut herself off as she heard the doorbell chime. Letting out a sigh, she went to get it. Probably another friggin girl scout.
"Look we already bought all of your ginger snap cookies can you please find a new family to suck dr-"
"Hi Gloria!"
Gloria cut herself off, looking down to see that Remy kid Cricket liked standing there in swim trunks and a T-shirt.
"Oh hi, where's your bodyguard?"
"Vasquez? It's his day off, you don't think he follows me around 24/7? Do you?"
She kinda did actually.
"So, is Cricket here, I was gonna ask if he wanted to come over to my house to swim."
"Sorry bud, Cricket just left for the pool with Tilly. Chip took them." Gloria mumbled the last part with a sulky frown.
"Oh," Remy frowned. "Well that's okay then. I'll just show him our new slide another ti-Wait Chip!?" Remy sighed dramatically, pinching the space between his eyebrows. "Cricket. I still don't know how he can trust that jerk."
Gloria scoffed. "Tell me about it."
Remy sighed. "If only I could get him to see common sense."
"Yeah, you and me…" Gloria found herself trailing off as the gears in her head began to turn. "..both…"
"Well thanks anyway." Remy said as he began to walk down the porch steps. "Tell Cricket and Tilly I said hi-"
"Wait!"
Gloria raced after Remy and grabbed his shoulder. The boy's widened. "Why don't I drive you to the pool Cricket's at?"
Remy arched a brow. "Uh, okay….that's..nice of you?"
Gloria nodded as she grabbed her car keys off the little door side table.
"Don't mention it."
"Oh okay-"
"Because you're gonna help me with something."
Remy frowned as she led him towards her car. "Uh What?"
Gloria sighed as she unlocked her passenger side door. "You're gonna help me prove to them and everyone else that Chip is still the same untrustworthy scumbag he always was."
Remy blinked.
Gloria bit her lip unsure if she was maybe sounding just a touch crazy to the ten year ol-
Remy suddenly nodded his head, a determined look on his small, chubby features.
"Got it, I'm in."