Chapter Text
They say your soulmate's name appears on your skin when you're "ready". Well, that absolutely can't be, because Atsumu has been ready for years.
He's also pretty sure that there is no real criteria that the universe goes off of when deeming someone ready. Osamu got his when they were still in high school, though Atsumu suspects that that's at least in part due to the fact that he and Sunarin were already mostly in love.
And okay, maybe Osamu might also have him beat on maturity in some ways - not that he'd ever hear him admit it - but it's still not fair. He tries to be patient about the whole thing, but admittedly, it hurts seeing Shouyou tackle Kageyama to the ground because the Adlers setter has finally gotten his mark to match Shouyou's.
No, Atsumu's gotten into his twenties and he's established in his career and his skin still remains bare. What more can the universe want from him?
He spends probably an unbearable amount of time staring at the small black band that rests on Sakusa's wrist. He's never asked, but he doesn't need to to know that it's covering up his soulmate's name.
It's not even a surprise that Omi has his mark, honestly. He's got the air of someone who has their act together, so of course he has his soulmark. And of course he's the private type, so of course it's covered up.
And, well, Atsumu can't help but wonder about it.
By nature, he's the curious type (read: a little bit nosy), so of course he wants to know. Has Omi already met his soulmate? Are they together? Is that why Omi prefers not to hang out with the team, because he's got some cutie that he's running home to? And maybe the most important question of all: why does it matter?
This last question, actually, he chooses not to analyze.
"Do they mind you covering it up?" he asks one day during stretches.
Sakusa looks a little bit startled, as if he wasn't expecting to be spoken to. There's something nice about being able to ruffle his feathers a little. "What?"
"Your soulmate," he says, gesturing towards the band on his wrist. It's just loose enough to not cut off circulation or limit movement, tight enough that Atsumu can't even hope to sneak a peek at the name underneath it. "Does it bother them to have you cover their name? Or are they as private as you?"
Sakusa actually looks a little bit flustered for a second, like maybe the mere thought of his soulmate is just too much for him to bear, and it's... cute. Really cute, actually. But then he just shakes his head. "They don't know."
"What? They don't know that you hide their name?" he asks. It seems farfetched.
"No, they don't know they're my soulmate," he corrects, shaking his head.
"But you know them?"
"Yes."
Stupid question, actually. If Sakusa didn't know his soulmate, then there'd be no way for him to know they didn't know he was theirs.
"Huh. Are you gonna tell them?" he asks.
"Probably not," he says with a shrug. "I think I'll probably wait for the mark to appear, unless it takes him too long."
Atsumu is halfway to responding when it hits him: him. Sakusa's soulmate is a him.
It feels like a bigger revelation than it probably is. Sakusa always abstains from conversations about partners and soulmates and everything of that kind, but Atsumu has always just kind of gotten a vibe off of him.
It definitely still doesn't make Atsumu feel any kind of way, though. Other than a little bit jealous.
"You don't have yours," Sakusa says. It's not a question, just a statement of fact.
"I don't. And you don't hafta rub it in," he says.
"I wasn't going to," he says, shaking his head. "You were the one who brought it up."
"Well... Yeah," he says, because admittedly he doesn't have a comeback to that. Sakusa is right.
"I take it it bothers you?" he asks, raising an eyebrow at him.
"Knowing that someone's out there that's meant for me but not knowing who? Yeah, it's rough," he says.
Sakusa nods. "Why do you suppose you haven't gotten it yet?"
"That, Omi Omi, is the grand prize question."
There's a brief silence. "If your soulmate knew already, would you want them to tell you?"
Atsumu barks out a little laugh. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were askin' for advice for your own situation."
"It's applicable," he responds evenly, then prompts, "So?"
"Nah, I wouldn't wanna be told," he says. "I mean, the universe says I'm not ready, right? Can't go spitting in the face of destiny and all that."
"I see," he says. A little wrinkle forms between his eyebrows, but he nods. "Fair enough."
"But I can't pretend I'm not getting a little impatient," Atsumu adds with a laugh. "So your soulmate might feel differently about the whole thing."
Seemingly satisfied, Sakusa nods. "Thank you, Miya," he says, shoving himself to his feet. He's gone before Atsumu can protest, but that's fine. He can implode about Sakusa's male soulmate in peace now.
*
He doesn't dwell on it too much. He doesn't let himself.
Alright. Truth be told, he dwells a little.
Which is ridiculous, because there's no real reason for it. He's yearning, but it's not even Sakusa that he's yearning for. He's probably just thinking about it because it's a mystery and he likes mysteries, and for whatever reason, he wants Sakusa to like him. Helping him with his soulmate situation - even if it is, in fact, not a "situation" at all, much less one that needs his help - feels like the right thing to do.
He thinks that Sakusa is friendlier toward him after they first broach the topic of soulmates. It feels good, actually, because it's something that he's quietly felt self-conscious about - most people have gotten their marks by his age. So he tends to just not talk about it with anyone but Osamu. But Sakusa doesn't make him feel bad about it, doesn't mind when he gets into one of his moods and decides to complain about how he's a little mad at the universe for putting him in this situation.
It's nice, really. Especially on the days that he's getting a little extra in his feelings about it and starts to wonder if the reason that he hasn't yet gotten his soulmark is that he's just never getting one. There's no one who is his perfect match. When he voices that thought, Sakusa doesn't laugh, but he does tell him he's being ridiculous. Which, actually, does help in its own strange kind of way.
Little by little, against all expectations and against all odds, Sakusa Kiyoomi, of all people, becomes one of Atsumu's closest friends.
One thing remains consistent, though: Sakusa doesn't tell him anything about his own soulmate.
He tries not to take it to heart, because even though they've gotten closer, Sakusa is still Sakusa. It's equal parts fun and disappointing to prod at him and get next to no answers. He does know, at least, that he's known his soulmate for "a while," though he has no way of knowing how long that is.
He's also had his mark for "a while," which is just as nebulous a timeframe. Atsumu tries to remember whether he had seen the band on his wrist back in high school, too, but admittedly, he hadn't paid that much attention back then.
At any rate, a part of Atsumu selfishly doesn't want Kiyoomi to properly connect with his soulmate. He's seen how it works: when you and your soulmate get together, you lose track of everyone else. And he gets it, he does, and he's not upset, but…
Well. He just doesn't really want to lose this that way. Come to think of it, this is probably why the universe thinks he's not 'ready' for his own soulmate. He’s too selfish.
Weeks turn into months, and an unfortunate truth settles over Atsumu: he's falling in love with Kiyoomi.
Absolutely the worst case scenario.
He's afraid to admit it, even to himself. When he tells Osamu, he feels like he's going to vomit or pass out. People date people other than their soulmates. It's not unheard of. But he knows that's not him - call him a hopeless romantic, but ever since he was a kid, he's always valued the thought of his soulmate. It's the kind of bond that feels sacred, something all his own.
(Maybe that comes from having a twin.)
And while Kiyoomi has never said it, Atsumu is pretty sure his soulmate is important to him, too. It's in the way he talks about him, and how he'll sometimes catch him fiddling with his wristband idly, like he's thinking about the person whose name rests on his skin.
So he knows he can't address it. For Kiyoomi's sake and his own, this is something that he's going to have to shoulder on his own.
The morning after he commits himself to this, something changes.
He rolls out of bed and stumbles to the bathroom the same as he ever does, rubs the sleep out of his eyes as he approaches the mirror and - oh.
As he pulls his hands back, something catches his attention.
There's something on his wrist.
There's writing on his wrist.
There's a name on his wrist.
It's right there on the sensitive skin right below the heel of his hand, and it's right where Kiyoomi's soulmark is. Not that Atsumu's thinking about that right now, because all of his thoughts right now are dedicated to -
Oh.
Sakusa Kiyoomi.
For a second, he's sure he's misread it, like maybe his brain has chosen to fill in a blank here because he's already gotten a little too used to dedicating his thoughts to Kiyoomi. But no, he stares at it and touches it and pinches himself and the lettering never changes. He grabs his phone and dials Kiyoomi without even thinking about it.
He has no idea what to say, and when the call is answered, he remains silent for long enough that he listens as Kiyoomi starts to think he's been butt-dialed.
"Omi?" he says eventually, and he wonders if his voice comes across as shaky as he's feeling.
"Atsumu?" There's genuine concern in Kiyoomi's voice. "Is something wrong?"
"No. God, no, nothing's wrong," he says quickly. "I - you - "
For probably the first time in his life, he's actually at a loss for words.
Somehow, though, Kiyoomi still picks up what he's trying to say.
"You - did you get your soulmark?" he asks.
Atsumu nods before he remembers that Kiyoomi can't see him. "Yeah."
Atsumu's phone beeps.
Kiyoomi has hung up.
And that's... not exactly how he pictured this going, if he's going to be perfectly honest. Not that he's pictured this happening.
(He has. He just didn't think it'd be anything more than a silly little fantasy.)
He calls again but the call is ignored. He's starting to worry - but how, he wonders, could Kiyoomi be upset about this when he's the one who apparently has known all this time - when there's a knock on his door.
Immediately, his heart feels lighter, because of course Kiyoomi is here.
When he opens the door, they just stare for a moment, as if suddenly they are both entirely unprepared for this.
But then he's kissing Kiyoomi, like it's the only thing he knows how to do. He holds him like he's the only thing that matters, because he is the only thing that matters. He realizes that his hands are shaking just a little bit, so he grips Kiyoomi a little bit tighter to keep himself steady.
When he pulls back, Kiyoomi doesn't let him get far, resting his forehead against Atsumu's.
His hands lift and Atsumu watches, enraptured, as he unsnaps the button that's been keeping the band on his wrist for all this time. It's no mystery any more what he'll find there, but it still makes his stomach do a little flip to see his name right there on Kiyoomi's skin, after so long imagining who his soul might be tied to. Him. It's him, and he can't believe it.
"You absolute asshole, Atsumu," Kiyoomi mutters. "You kept me waiting so much longer than I thought you would."
He laughs, and he kisses Kiyoomi again. He can't stop kissing him. "Promise I'll make up for lost time."
"I'll hold you to that."