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Marc would only start to pay attention to the world around twilight. It didn’t really matter what took place before then; after all, the day belonged to Steven.
For Marc, the mornings were spent just passively watching Steven bumble around his day. During those hours, sometimes Marc would let his mind drift to whatever task awaited him at night, or, on rare occasion, to her. But he would never spare a thought as to whatever Steven did before the clock struck five; who was he to judge?
When the clock did strike five though, Marc always found himself waking up. Khonsu could call upon him at any moment, and he never took kindly to his Avatar being late.
Still, Marc would try to gently pry control from Steven. Khonsu would mock him for caring so much about the “idiot” but Marc wanted Steven to get through this unscathed. For both their sakes.
He wondered if Steven ever noticed. There were times when Steven seemed to sense his presence, despite the care that Marc took with him, and his movements would get even more erratic than usual as Marc would slowly inch his way into the body.
“Ah!” Steven yelped and cupped his face as he crashed into the door. Marc felt the pain too when his face had collided with the glass.
It made him wonder if Steven felt the pain even when he was buried away into a safe corner of his mind.
Clumsy fool, Marc heard Khonsu mutter.
If anything, Marc thought that he was the clumsy one. Cursing himself, he released the minuscule hold he had over their body.
He’d let Steven enjoy a little bit of the night today, to make up for the incident. Marc just hoped that he wouldn’t end up regretting it.
“You wouldn’t believe the day I had today,” Steven began as he sat down at his usual place next to the street performer.
As he watched Steven prattle about some nonsense related to his boss, Marc rolled his eyes. Or, at least he would have, if he had a body at the time.
Marc never understood why it was this particular street performer Steven turned to. It wasn’t as if he ever talked back to Steven; he was just forced to listen to-
Oh.
Marc never had many friends in his childhood. There was Rand-
No, Marc corrected himself as he felt a wave of nausea overtake him, he didn’t have any friends in his childhood. He didn’t have any need for them, and he still didn’t see the need for companionship.
He allowed Steven’s soft voice to flood his thoughts, letting them wash away the fragments of past that were began to push through. He couldn’t let them resurface, not while Steven was still in control.
The sky was dark and there was a slight chill in the air as Steven wrapped up his story and waved goodbye to the human statue. The performer, and Marc had to give him credit for being so devoted to the act, never waved back.
Even if Marc didn’t understand the point of companionship, it was clear that Steven saw something in it. And yearned for it.
There were times where their thoughts and emotions would occasionally bleed through and cross that invisible boundary that divided them. During those moments, it became impossible which thought belonged to who, and Marc was sure that both of them were feeling an incredibly strong pang of loneliness.
That had to have been Steven, Marc told himself. A small part of him protested; the sadness was stronger than usual, as if there was something or someone adding to that flood of emotion. That had to have been Steven too; Marc never saw the point of sentimentality.
Through Steven’s eyes, Marc could see the clouds and the occasional star. But there was no sign of the moon.
Marc knew that even if the moon wasn’t there, it didn’t mean that it couldn’t show its face later. He should be trying to ease his mind into their body, but he couldn’t. Not yet, while Steven still walked alone and hummed sadly to himself.
Just another hour, Marc told himself.
He really should just go back to blankly watching the world. Yet, as much as he loathed it, Marc wanted to experience as much of the night as he could with Steven.
Perhaps it could bring some Steven some peace that he wasn’t alone in this world. Even if his companion could never make his presence known.
It was better that way.
Marc was always awkward with children. He never really knew what to do with them, and he always felt his body stiffen whenever they would try to play with him or even talk to him.
But Steven? He seemed to be most at ease around them, befriending them with his gentle reprimands or some story about myths and adventures. Today, he had gathered a little audience of children as he told them about Ra and Khonsu.
If anything good had come out of his contract with Khonsu, it was that it gave Marc a convenient excuse to not have to ever entertain the idea of having children of his own. Truth be told, he hadn’t even thought of himself as the marrying type but he went off and gotten that done in a moment of weakness.
He saw a woman give Steven a look of approval as the children giggled at a joke he told. Selfish as it was, Marc couldn’t let Steven make that same mistake. It would save all of them the pain.
He had come up with an excuse about a mission and left his wife the day he realized that the stray thought of starting a family had slowly started to creep in. He didn’t deserve to have any; he was a poor excuse of a son and an even poorer excuse of a brother. All he'd ever pass on to any potential children was the pain and misery he'd known his entire life.
Marc had to admit though, as Steven waved goodbye to the children, that he would make a good father. That is, if it weren’t for the fact that Marc was there and with him, the contract with Khonsu.
The moon still had yet to make an appearance, and Steven slowly whistled as he walked down the street.
A clock tower in the distance signaled the passing of the hour, but Marc’s mind drifted back to the children and the lingering joy that had somehow managed to permeate their boundary yet again.
Perhaps when this was all over, Marc should just disappear.
No. He would disappear.
Maybe that way Steven could have a family of his after all.
When they were close to their apartment, Marc felt Steven reach for his phone. There was a numbness that suddenly began to take over Marc, and all he wanted to do was retreat deeper inside until nothing remained of him.
And he would. Someday.
Right now, though, he had to deal with the flood of emotions overtaking him as he heard Steven talk to his (or was it their?) mother.
“Yeah, Mum. I had a good day.” Steven whispered softly into the phone. “Maybe I can even visit over the weekend?”
The wall between them was starting to crumble, even as much as Marc tried to reign himself in. He was too late, though.
“Huh? I—I don’t know what’s happening, Mum.” Steven laughed nervously. “There’s this sudden urge to cry- oh, and would you look at that? I’m crying. For no reason. Silly, innit?”
There was a reason why they were both crying. Steven didn’t know (and Marc would make sure that he never knew), but Marc knew.
Except he wasn’t worthy of shedding those tears. He never would be.
The tears had dried and were forgotten by the time Steven pulled aside his curtains to look at the night.
“Wouldn’t you look at that?” Steven whispered to his goldfish. “Isn’t the moon beautiful today?”
Just the mention of the moon brought forth Khonsu’s whispers to summon Marc to his side.
On other days, Marc quietly did what he was told. There wasn’t any point of resisting. But today, as he watched Steven wrap the strap around his ankle, something inside him didn’t want Steven to go to sleep.
It’s pathetic, really, all these thoughts that were running through his head. Thoughts about Layla or what she would think if she met Steven. Thoughts of finally being free from Khonsu. Thoughts about Steven continuing to live a blissful life.
This was why he had resigned himself to being a passive observer when it came to Steven; he had only allowed himself to have an opinion for a few hours and Marc was reduced to wishing that Steven never went to sleep. That they could exist together, and he could feel and live life like Steven did.
Yet, it was impossible. Only people like Steven- people whose hearts were filled with nothing but pure thoughts- deserved the peace.
Marc told himself that he couldn’t let the wall between them break down again. Not only because these emotions served no purpose other than to weaken him and tether him down, but because he was sure that Steven would abandon him as soon as he learned about Marc’s existence.
And then, Marc would truly be alone.
Khonsu appeared behind as Marc stared up at the moon. He ignored Khonsu’s growls and slowly opened and closed his hand while he focused deep inside him, wondering if Steven was awake.
He wasn’t. Good. He would keep it that way.
“About time you showed up.” Khonsu said as he stood beside Marc. “I was wondering if I’d have to finally settle for the idiot today.”
A part of Marc wanted to beat him into a bloody pulp for calling Steven that. Instead, he kept his voice steady and turned to face Khonsu.
“Keep him out of this. The contract is between you and me. There’s no third party involved.”
Marc wasn’t sure why Khonsu let out that snort of amusement as if he was in on some secret that Marc wasn’t privy to.
“As if I’d ever need him. Now, are you going to get on your task or not?”
Tonight, he would. But after today, Marc would find a way out of this contract. Not for his sake, but Steven’s.
As he leapt for the moon, Marc told himself that today, he fought for Khonsu. But when the sun came out, he’d fight for Steven.
To finally give him the life he deserved to have.