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“How can I fix this?” Red was stained all around the house: on the cabinets, on the rug, over the tablecloth (which was now sprawled on the ground). It smelt like ash, smoke, and spoiled fruit.
Fire was blazing from the living room, succumbing more bits of the building as Soobin sat in his room in shame.
Now that’s left were footprints and ashes—marks of their broken friendship that will scar Soobin for who knows how long.
He didn’t care how his house would turn to ashes.
“I’ve ruined our friendship” Soobin said ashamed, “I don’t deserve you guys at all.” Beomgyu was the only member of their friend group that stayed. Why?
“No, you don’t, I’m here for you hyung,” Beomgyu comforts, a delicacy in his voice. His clothes were stained, red paste splattered all over. His eyes gleam of a hope that Soobin ignores.
“But I manipulated you and Huening! I made all of them upset by not telling you guys the truth..”
“Taehyun couldn’t trust me...” Soobin regrets it all—lying to them. He wishes he can turn back time.
“Who cares about them, they don’t like you anymore..”
“Beomgyu, how could-“
“-They’re not loyal and forgiving, like how true friends are.” Soobin looked up and saw Beomgyu gazing into his eyes.
“I forgive you hyung, I want to be by your side forever..” Beomgyu announces.
“Gyu...you don’t want to, I’m just a burden..” The younger’s heart ached knowing Soobin was still incriminating himself, when in Beomgyu’s eyes, he deserves the world.
When he first met Soobin, he was so kind and generous. Beomgyu loved spending every moment with him. Even through the horrible events, he still saw the good in him.
“Nice people like you should stay far away from back-stabbing people like me..” Soobin chokes. Tears form in his eyes. Everything becomes blurry, he wipes his eyes miserably as he sniffs.
The fight their friends had together flashed in his mind—Soobin tensed; he closed his eyes shut. A stream of tears run down his cheek.
“No hyung, I already forgive you. I believe in you,” Beomgyu stresses, he couldn’t stand seeing Soobin cry.
Soobin’s eyes were now red and puffy as he tries to swallow the pain of guilt.
Beomgyu’s blood boils thinking about his fake friends, they made Soobin feel lonely and silenced.
God knows how much Beomgyu wanted to hold Soobin’s face, to see his eye smile again. He goes up to Soobin and embraces him. Soobin flinches but he relaxes his shoulders when he noticed Beomgyu is genuine about the gesture.
“I see the you inside the cold exterior—you’re lonely, but that’s why I want to stay with you,” Beomgyu murmurs. Resting his head on his shoulder, his breath against Soobin’s ear.
Soobin’s pulse races. He doesn’t let go, somehow he needs this.. “Please let me stay with you..”
“I..” Soobin feels so emotional, learning Beomgyu still wants to be with him, still—he doesn’t trust himself to be with anyone.
But yet, the older notices how the Beomgyu stares at him earlier, like he was the only thing in the world. His body temperature is as hot has the house fire, he feels uneasy as blush crept up his cheeks.
“No, y-you can’t stay with me—I’m broken..” Soobin denies. His heart aches, it ties up into knots with every word the younger spoke, feeling happiness—but his fear weighs it down every time, and he hates it so much. Soobin doesn’t want to hurt Beomgyu.
“Hyung, please. I don’t care about anything else anymore, I only want you...” The younger tugs on Soobin’s sleeve. He desperately laces their fingers together, leaning his head in Soobin’s collarbone. “I love you..”
“Gyu...” Soobin utters, shocked. More guilt piles onto his plate, have Soobin broke Beomgyu’s heart when he ignored everyone?
Soobin starts to regret not saying a word to his friends and letting jokes escalate. How much did Beomgyu bury his feelings and watch Soobin transform into another person?
He replayed moments of them together, he loved them all. Even their petty fights and teasing, it only strengthened their love for one another. Is that why Beomgyu still wants to be with him? Soobin just realized.
“That one night when we were stargazing,” Beomgyu describes, “ever since you asked me to be there for you.” Soobin recalls that night. That night was a turning point of their relationship. Beomgyu was committed to it ever since.
Soobin’s breath hitches—Beomgyu had always expressed his feelings the most. His bright smiles, shimmering eyes, his laugh—he never fails to make Soobin happy.
He glances at Beomgyu, who is still resting his head in the crew of Soobin’s neck. He yearns to see Beomgyu smile again.
Soobin has felt attracted to his friend before, but he never made any advances besides subtle touches and words that were weaved with underlying love.
“I was willing to sacrifice anything in that moment,” Beomgyu’s voice wavers. His newly formed tears glistened like crystals.
Beomgyu masked his feelings, fearing his crush wouldn’t be reciprocated. But now, they grew stronger—he couldn’t hold them back any longer. Beomgyu fell for the leader, following his steps blindly in love.
Soobin sniffs, his emotions overflowing. His arms were wrapped around the younger, his hands clutching his clothes tightly.
As much as Soobin wants to protect Beomgyu from himself, he wants Beomgyu too. Pain and love were the two reasons behind the tears that slid down his face.
The fire roared from the living room, the house is heating up fast, they two start to sweat. But they did not care, still hugging and feeling the warmth from each other.
Beomgyu looks up, seeing Soobin’s eyes looking down, his eyes watery and full of ache. His eyelashes delicate; blinking away the forming teardrops.
Beomgyu knows his confession was sudden, but he needs Soobin—he wants to see him smile again. He can’t let Soobin give up on everything just because of several mistakes. Mistakes that weren’t even his fault.
“I know I wasn’t there when you needed me, but I’m here for you now.”
Soobin shut his eyes, another stream of tears flowing. For moments he couldn’t respond back, conscious that sobs would come out.
Oh how Soobin wants to just leave the face of the earth right now, the overbearing feelings that feels so mixed, he wants to stop feeling them-
But a sudden impulse causes Beomgyu to lean forward, closing the distance between their lips.
Sensory overload was felt by the two, their hearts beating ecstatically.
The kiss was desperate. Beomgyu dreamed about this moment since forever, craving the taste of Soobin’s lips.
Meanwhile the older was in denial. He shouldn’t be allowed sharing this love with someone he betrayed. But he kisses back, pushing past his shame. He doesn’t want Beomgyu to hurt further. Soobin accepts his growing feelings for him. He wants Beomgyu—
It was the end of the world to them, both boys craving one last moment to share together.
The younger’s head tilts as he deepened the kiss, passion seeping through. They savor each other’s flavor, both tasting like the strawberries they had ate earlier, prior to the tomato fight and fire.
Intoxicated by the magic of it all— Both of them knew that they needed to stay with each other from now to eternity.
Soobin pauses, letting go of the kiss, both of them were panting, breathless and lovesick. “I’m so sorry Beomgyu..”
“Don’t apologize, hyung, it’s all over. All we can do is move on, even if it was your fault, I forgive you.”
Beomgyu knew Soobin from the day they became friends, he changed but the good in him never escaped, only shadowed by doubt and sadness. He knows deep inside, Soobin didn’t mean to break the whole friendship between all the boys.
“I won’t let anyone separate us then, you’re all I have left..” the older manages to speak. “I love you too, Beomgyu—I do, so much.”
Beomgyu plants a kiss on Soobin’s neck, sending tingles across the older’s body.
“I still feel like I don’t deserve you.” Soobin cups Beomgyu’s cheek, gazing into his eyes with pure affection.
“No hyung, you do. Just by choosing to let me be with you, I couldn’t be any more happier..” His hand rests on Soobin’s own. He smiles feebly, but his eyes showed immense joy.
Soobin’s eyes flutter shut as his lips hover over Beomgyu’s, their lips brushing against each other gently.
Beomgyu feels impatient, dying for another kiss, but somehow, this moment freezes his brain. Unable to act any motion, he was enchanted by this move.
“I’m grateful you understand me, even if I’m a bit twisted for what I’ve done,” Soobin whispers, his breath felt by Beomgyu—the intimacy feeding the latter’s desire.
“Of course,” Beomgyu responds, his head is spinning with thoughts but Soobin helped him feel steady. The flames behind them only added to the moment.
Beomgyu burns for Soobin. No fire can burn as bright as his love for him.
“You acted so distant from us, I thought I did something wrong.” Tears fill the rim of his eyes and he wipes them instantly. “For so long I wanted to make you smile, see your dimple appear..”
“Promise you will tell me everything from now on?“
Soobin’s heart churns seeing the damage he done to the house and his beloved friend, flames lighting behind him and growing hotter.
Beomgyu’s eyes show fear but hope at the same time, the elder just wants to protect him forever and run away with him.
The elder nods. “I promise.”
The younger catches glimpse of said fire coming nearer. He’s suddenly snapped back to reality.
“We should leave before the flames cascade the exit,” Beomgyu says. Part of him wants to stay in the house, but what would happen to them as a result?
The fire already reached up the stairs—the room is emanating heat from the blazes that were creeping closer to the room.
“No-it’s too late-“ Soobin frets as he thinks of an alternative way to leave. They could either jump off the window and get injured, or burn alive.
The two sweat profusely as the fire reaches the door step.
“Take my hand!” Soobin urgently shouts. The fire is creeping closer and finally enters the room. The younger grabs his hand and the two avoid the fire, their backs were against the window now.
“Should we jump?”
“Yes, it’s only two stories high,” Soobin comments, “besides, just make sure to land on your feet, bend your knees and roll to release the shock.”
“Have you been waiting for this moment to happen?” Beomgyu chuckles to relieve himself, but he is scared for his life right now.
“Yes and no,” Soobin replies. Survival is valuable to learn!
Beomgyu’s eyes told Soobin he is worried, will they make it?
Soobin is sure they will. “It’s okay Gyu, we‘re together now.”
Beomgyu’s muscles relaxes from this, he breathes in and out as to prep before their leap.
The fire is reaching to their heels. The fire is just behind them, scorching hot.
“I love you.” The orbs in Beomgyu’s eyes reflected the fire’s flames, yet it was like a galaxy of stars to Soobin.
The older smiles one last time before the two jump off from the building.