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“Can I ask you something?” Janine says, when they’re out at after-work drinks at the end of the first week of school. Everyone else is talking about their new students and parents and struggles of the week, but Janine is talking only to Gregory. Her voice is softer than usual, and she looks a little nervous, in a way he’s not used to seeing from her.
Gregory sits up a little straighter. “Uh, sure. What’s up?”
“What do you think of Tinder?”
“What?” Gregory blinks at her. “What are you talking about?”
Her eyes are wide, and he can tell she’s been thinking about this for a while. She and Tariq broke up at the end of last school year, so she’s been single for months. It makes sense that she’d be trying to get back out there. He’s just surprised that Tinder is her first choice.
Janine sighs, ducking her head so she’s not looking directly at him. “I haven’t dated since high school. I’ve only ever dated Tariq. I don’t know how any of this works.” Her eyes snap back up to meet Gregory’s, and he can see the vulnerability there. The last time he saw this look in her eyes, she was at the top of a ladder, terrified and unable to come down.
“I mean, I’m no expert…”
“More of an expert than I am,” she says, interrupting him. She’s fidgeting now, fingers playing over each other in her lap. Gregory wants to reach over and still them, reassure her somehow, but he knows he can’t do that. “You’re still dating Taylor, right?”
“Um, kind of. Not really. She’s back in New York, so it’s complicated.” He’s still not really sure what’s going on there. When she’s in town, Taylor’s all over him, but as soon as she leaves, they hardly talk. He enjoys her company, but she might not be exactly the person for him, if he’s really honest about it.
Janine’s eyebrows shoot up and she frowns, instantly attentive to what Gregory is sharing. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t be asking you about this.”
“No, it’s okay.” He’s not sure why, but he doesn’t really have a lot of emotions about the whole Taylor situation. It just is what it is, at least for now.
“I just, I don’t know what to do. I downloaded Tinder because Ava told me it’s the place to look, but I got overwhelmed immediately and deleted my account.”
“Don’t use Tinder,” he says firmly. “If you want my opinion, stay off Tinder.”
“But then what do I do?” She looks so lost, Gregory is tempted to just give her some bullshit advice about finding someone when you’re not looking or how there’s someone out there for everyone, but he can’t do that. Not to Janine.
“Live your life. Do the things you love. Be you, as a whole person, by yourself. Then think about finding someone.”
Janine sits back a little, and Gregory can see the wheels turning in her head, the insecurity that’s driving this whole conversation.
“But what if I already missed them? My person? What if I wasted all that time with Tariq and I just end up alone.”
“You aren’t going to end up alone.”
“How do you know?” Her voice breaks a little, and Gregory’s heart pounds a little harder against his ribs.
“Because you’re amazing and you deserve to be with someone who knows that.”
Janine sighs again, eyes shining a little extra bright. She doesn’t look totally convinced, but at least she doesn’t look so scared and sad. “Thanks for being such a great friend, Gregory. You’re going to find someone too. Even if it’s not Taylor.”
Gregory nudges Janine with his shoulder and she laughs softly. “We’ll both figure it out.”
“I hope so.”
“I know so.”
Janine reaches over and squeezes his forearm once, before blinking hard to clear her eyes and focusing back on the conversation the rest of the teachers are having about Ava’s newest ideas for a pep rally involving Eagles cheerleaders.
Gregory can almost feel the warmth of her hand on his arm all the way home. He keeps touching the spot unconsciously, almost wishing he could spend more time with her.
As if she’s read his mind, a text comes through on his phone and he knows, before he reads it, that it’s from Janine.
“Thanks again for our talk today. I’m so glad you’re staying at Abbott.”
Smiling to himself, Gregory sends her something back, realizing just how true it is.
“Me too.”