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Food? Check. Water? Check. Chilis? Double-check. Operation: “Spicy Stir-Fried Fish Noodles” is a go.
As the three other members of his adventure team began to take their places at the dinner table in Xingqiu’s home near the Feiyun Commerce Guild, he couldn’t help but suppress a sinister chuckle that began to bubble in the back of his throat. His plan had just begun. Tonight, unbeknownst to the others, between the layers of pasta on Razor’s plate sat multiple slices of jeuyun chili cut thin enough to be perfectly covered. A couple of bites would surely turn his face sour like a dog who had just licked a lemon. Then they would all get a few quick laughs at his expense and shortly return to their dinner. The perfect light-hearted end to a long day.
In all their days of traveling with one another, this was the first time he had specially targeted a prank for Razor. There was never a chance to before, as the wolf-boy was always so naturally curious and acute. With him constantly hanging over with his shoulder when he cooked or already checking out their surroundings at the slightest snap of a twig, Xingqiu had consistently found himself with zero windows of opportunities to lay even the smallest of traps. But with Chongyun offering the boy lessons on how to properly wield a claymore while he prepared dinner, it seemed he had gotten lucky today.
Seated diagonally across from him, Xingqiu watched out of the corner of his right eye as Razor picked up his fork. Anticipation began to build up in his gut as he observed him slowly lift a pile of noodles towards his mouth and-
“Xingqiu!”
His eyes immediately snapped to the left at his name.
“Teyvat to Xingqiu! I’ve called your name at least three times now,” Bennett chucked from his place directly in front of him. To his right, he could hear a small, humorous breath leave Chongyun’s nose.
“Sorry,” he exhaled with a tinge of uncharacterized sheepishness, “I was merely lost in thought. What did you need?”
“I wanted to ask if you had any tips for wielding a sword!” Bennett exclaimed, waving his hands ecstatically in front of him, “Chongyun was able to teach Razor a lot about the claymore, so I wanted to know more about how to use my weapon. He suggested I ask you about it!”
Xingqiu blinked, “I know almost everything when it comes to brandishing a sword. I’ve read almost every text about it. Different techniques, styles, combat uses-”
“Teach me! Please, please, please!” the boy nearly begged, palms clasped together in front of him. If he weren’t sitting in a chair, he would have definitely been on his knees.
“However,” he continued nervously, “I’m not… the best teacher. Plus, I think the way you fight now is fine the way it is, is it not?”
“Still! I bet you could still teach me something to help me improve how I attack, even if it's just by a little bit. Like… Guhua arts!”
Another blink.
“...I suppose.”
“And hey!” Bennett blurted out, almost flinging the noodle on his fork onto the wall, “Maybe there’s a thing or two I could teach you from my training from the Knights of Favonius. Captain Kaeya has taught me a whole bunch of cool tricks!”
He took a second to mull it over before admitting, “That would be interesting…”
“C’monnn! It’ll be super fun, promise. We can have a little Team Benqiu time! Just me and you,” the adventurer pushed, “Benqiu against the world!”
Xingqiu let out a small string of laughs at his enthusiasm. He could never figure out how he had so much energy all the time.
“You know you want to,” Chongyun chimed in as if they were a tag team. Well, if his boyfriend was for it…
“Alright, I don’t see why not,” he snorted before pausing, “I look forward to it.”
Instantly, Bennett whooped in celebration, “Alright, woohoo!”
“...But personally, I prefer the name ‘Team Xingnett.’”
“Wait, wha-”
The loud clang of a fork echoed throughout the room. In a blink of an eye, everyone’s gaze was now on Razor, his utensil now abandoned on the edge of the table. Leaning forward in his seat, his long bangs obscured his face making it impossible to see his facial expression. The only sign something was wrong was the death-like grip he had around his own stomach and the unnerving sound of his shaky breaths. Xingqiu’s heartbeat pounded against his skull at the sight of his knuckles turning white.
An unsettling aura filled the room.
Chongyun was the first one to reach out, carefully inching his arm towards the boy across the table from him.
“Razor? What’s-”
The shrill of chair legs roughly scratching the worn wood floor.
The fading of pounding footsteps down the hall. The concerned cries of Bennett and Chongyun following suit.
The crash of glass meeting its impending doom from the sudden jostle of the table. The echoing slam of a door. The distant sound of knees violently hitting the floor.
The sight of Razor's plate, fully eaten. The glass of water next to it, barely even touched. The sweat forming at the base of his neck. The uncomfortable realization in his gut. The moment he took his eyes off of Razor. The conversation. The prank.
Oh, archons. What had he done?
Breaking out of his trance, Xingqiu immediately dashed into the same hallway the others had just gone down. At the end was his bathroom, the door swung wide open and Chongyun leaned up against the wall just outside, hands over his mouth, eyes blown wide open in mixed emotion. He could hear Razor’s agonizing retches mixing together with his pitiful sobs as he vomited the contents of his stomach into the toilet, Bennett patting his back and whispering soothing words in between. His own insides began to churn.
“You didn’t,” Chongyun cautiously whispered to him, “...Did you?”
Oh, how he wished he could say it was anyone else but him.
“I’m terribly sorry,” Xingqiu rasped, eyes cast down towards his feet, “It was- I thought-”
“It's fine. You couldn’t have known this was going to happen,” Bennett sighed from where he sat on the edge of the guest bed they had decided to put Razor in. His hand was tightly clamped onto the other’s, the adventurer occasionally swiping his scarred thumb over the boy’s knuckles in comfort.
“He was hungry and thought the noodles were just really hot,” the ashy-haired boy continued, “...He doesn’t have a lot of experience with spicy food.”
Amidst the comfort of his pillow, Razor peered over at Xingqiu with tired eyes. Even underneath the warm stream of light from the nearby lamp on the bedside table, he appeared scaringly pale. At the wry smile the wolf boy attempted to offer, he couldn’t help the stutter in his breathing. There was no hiding from the shaken-up glint in his ruby eyes. It was the look he had caused. The look he could have prevented.
“Let's leave him to rest,” Chongyun suggested softly, leaning down to brush a couple of stray strands of hair out of Razor’s face, “Call us if you need anything, alright?”
With a worn-out hum, the boy simply nodded, letting them say their good nights. Chongyun a cup of his scarred cheek, Bennett a chaste kiss to his lips. When it was Xingqiu’s turn, he opted to loosely hold the boy’s hand.
“I really am sorry, Razor,” he told the other, melancholy on the tip of his tongue. Xingqiu refused to meet the other’s eyes. In response, Razor intertwined their fingers and gave his hand a tiny squeeze. A wordless way of saying ’I know.’ Even though he knew didn’t deserve it yet, the lack of vindication involuntarily stung his already fragile heart.
In a daze, the blinds were shut, the lights turned off, and the bedroom door closed, leaving the remainder of the group to stand silently in the now darkened hallway.
Bennett spoke first, breaking the tension for a brief moment with a quick, “I'll go wash the dishes,” before scurrying off and disappearing into the dining room. Xingqiu could tell he needed a distraction from the thought of his boyfriend being ill.
Down to just two. Three, if he counted the aching of his ribs as they tried to rip themselves out of his chest to become a whole new person. If only hadn’t taken his eyes off of him. If only he had been paying attention. If only he had stopped him. If only things had gone the way he had written them out in his head.
“Hey,” Chongyun questioned soon after the adventurer’s departure, “Are you alright?”
And as if those four words had broken his world, Xingqiu immediately felt himself lose all control of his composure and slump against the exorcist’s shoulder, arms coming up to wrap tightly around his middle. Automatically, Chongyun returned his embrace, settling his own palms over the peak of his shoulder blades.
“Don’t be too hard on yourself. He'll forgive you. Just give him some time to recover.”
Xingqiu could only bury himself deeper into the crook of his neck, barely registering the reassuring kiss planted on the side of his forehead through his own guilty conscience.
He smelt of violetgrass and remorse.
By day two of Razor being sick, the sins of his own actions were practically etched into his brain. There was no hour of the day where the scene at dinner didn’t replay constantly within his mind over and over and over again. Even as he sat at the island in the kitchen watching Chongyun make tea break pancakes and eggs for breakfast, the thought continued to sit idly underneath his skin. Only adding fuel to the fire, he could conjure up at least a million different ways of making it up to Razor, but none of them ever seemed to be just right. By now, his imaginary trash bin was overflowing.
“I can hear your brain churning from over here, y’know,” Chongyun abruptly voiced, causing Xingqiu’s chin to almost slip out from where it rested in his palm.
He sputtered, “I- what- huh?”
“I know you’re thinking about Razor,” the icy-haired boy put simply, “Your face says it all.”
Even after dating each other for a while, Chongyun never failed to surprise him with how easily he could read him like a book.
“I just need to find the right way to approach him. My reparations need to show that I care, make up for all the pain I caused, and gain his trust back all in one!” he declared sternly, worries easily slipping out of his mouth at his boyfriend's attentiveness.
After placing a plate of steaming hot food on the table and standing next to him with his arms crossed over his chest, Chongyun snorted, “I really don’t think it's as complicated as you’re making it.”
He glared up at his partner.
“What do you mean?” Xingqiu pressed, narrowing his eyes at the emphasis on the word ‘really.’
“Razor is a pretty forgiving person,” he explained, poking the space between his creased eyebrows, “It’s not like him to hold a grudge over something as silly as one of your pranks.”
“You don’t know that for certain!” Xingqiu groaned, pulling Chongyun closer and burying his face into his chest. He could feel the vibrations of his boyfriend’s giggles amid the fabric of the boy’s apron. Peeking out from his impromptu hiding spot, he observed how Chongyun’s eyes glittered amongst early-morning sunlight.
“I do too,” Chongyun stated matter-of-factly, his face flushed a pretty pink at their sudden closeness. When he said nothing more, Xingqiu concluded he wasn’t going to be getting any more information than that.
“You’re not helping,” he grumbled in mock annoyance.
Chongyun gently removed himself from Xingqiu’s stubborn clutches. With a smile that met his eyes, he returned to the stove with a sing-songy, “you’ll seeee,” much to Xingqiu’s chagrin.
Not even a minute later, a familiar loud voice bounced throughout his home.
“Guess whose stomach finally allowed him to get out of bed this morning!” it declared, cheerfully stretching out each syllable to its max.
Swiveling around in his seat, he was met with the sight of a still sleepy Razor being carried bridal style by a very energetic-looking Bennett. The way he presented himself was as if he was proudly showing his catch off to the world. Razor, on the other hand, looked to almost be the opposite, embarrassment on display through reddened ears and the way his arms were tightly folded around the boy’s neck. If Xingqiu listened close enough, he could hear him weakly pleading with the other to put him down.
“Good morning, Razor,” Chongyun greeted as Bennett finally lowered him onto a stool next to Xingqiu, “How’re you feeling?”
“Little better,” he answered after a beat. Although short, that was more than enough to satisfy their qualms.
“That's good! I’m glad to hear that,” the exorcist replied with a tender smile and a ruffle to his silver hair, contributing to his already terrible bedhead.
Bennett immediately joined Chongyun by the flame with a childlike tone, “Whatcha making?”
“Pancakes and eggs,” the other replied, scooping his latest batch onto a clean plate and serving it to Razor, “In order to recover, you still need to eat a bit. But don’t force yourself, okay?”
Said boy nodded in understanding.
“Oh! I love making eggs! Lemme help!” Bennett gasped. With a huff of amusement, Chongyun handed him a spatula knowing all too well that at least half of them would turn out charred.
Xingqiu couldn’t help but squirm in his own seat as he watched Razor poke at his food without any acknowledgment towards him. He didn’t know how to start. An apology? No. He already did that. Twice. Maybe a thorough explanation of his thought process would work… Never mind, He didn’t have time for something like that and it would be too wordy to understand anyways. Perhaps, he should just be direct. Or, he could be mellow about it and ease a casual conversation into the root of the problem.
…Archons, this was harder than the books made it out to be. Thinking of a way to get his point across was only making Xingqiu realize that he was definitely not as smooth of a talker as the characters in his stories.
A droplet of sweat rolled down the nape of his neck.
He should just say something. Anything. The silence was killing him.
Wringing his clammy palms in his lap, he swallowed the lump in his throat and swiftly turned towards Razor, his eyes screwed shut.
“Ra-”
“Xingqiu.”
With a jolt, he opened his eyes to be met with Razor calmly staring right back at him. Glancing downwards, a fork with a piece of pancake at the end was being pointed towards his mouth. He faltered backward slightly.
“Huh?”
“Eat,” Razor requested, pushing the utensil forward to close the distance once more.
“I’m afraid I don’t understand, I-”
“Eat,” he repeated, not backing down, “Xingqiu not hungry?”
Following Razor’s eyes dart from his own untouched plate back up to him, it instantly clicked. He was worried for him because he wasn’t eating. He must have looked crazy just sitting there watching his food get cold.
“I'll eat, I'll eat!” Xingqiu blurted out, not wanting Razor to fret over him any longer. After all, he should be the one that was concerned about him, not the other way around. Reaching out to take a hold of his wrist to steady the wavering fork, he swiftly ate the fluffy piece of cake in a couple of bites. The vague taste of sugar coated his mouth.
“Good?” Razor asked.
“Yeah, it’s good,” he answered, releasing his grip on the other.
Content with his answer, the wolf boy let out a faint hum. At the same time Razor went to cut another piece out of his food, Xingqiu’s brain came up with an idea. Maybe it truly wasn’t as complicated as he originally thought it was. Before he even knew it he had flipped the switch, a fork full of egg now pointed in Razor’s direction.
“Your turn.”
“Hm?”
“Here,” Xingqiu pursued, “You should eat something too.”
Noticing the food being offered in front of him, Razor only paused for a small second before eating the food off of the fork just as he had done before. Almost instantly, a wave of relief rushed over him. Razor trusted him again.
“Good?” he asked.
Instead of a yes, Razor’s lips stretched into a thin line, “Cold.”
A lofty laugh left Xingqiu’s throat. It was like the whole fiasco had never even happened. Admittedly, Chongyun had been right all along. Razor knew that it was just a joke that went wrong by chance. All was forgiven.
Still, as Xingqiu watched the other happily indulge in minuscule bites from his plate, he couldn’t help but reminisce about his previous guilt. It was as if it had been soaked into his inner workings, leaving a difficult stain impossible to be scrubbed out even by the world’s most powerful cleaner. Now, even the slightest thought of pulling a similar stunt against Razor made him uneasy to the bone.
Xingqiu internally sighed at his self-inflicted turmoil.
…Maybe just pranks on Bennett and Chongyun were enough for now.