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Utahime woke up with tears in her eyes, a dream too much like the past. The hungry gnawing a hole into her stomach along with the ever-fluctuating hormones definitely didn’t help her state of emotions either. Turning her focus to the bedside clock, it glowed green. 2:13 am. These dreams bordering on nightmares would not let her rest.
Sniffing, she was careful not to make any noise that could possibly alert the two men she shared the bed with. Thankfully they gave her some space during her pregnancy and didn’t push her to be in the middle. For the five years they had before their first child, she was their designated cuddle pillow, always in the middle as it was easier for them to reach each other over her head. The three of them always being in contact. While she secretly loved the attention and affection, pregnancy had her waking up often and feeling too suffocated for her to be able to entertain their koala tendencies. Satoru always goes on about how he wishes he could crawl into her skin but now with an actual person in her uterus, that sentiment is no longer cute.
For a moment, she softly gazes across the bed toward the giant figures as she wipes away her tears. Her pregnancy pillow separates her from them effectively, giving her the cocoon she needed without the grabby hands. But as she watches Suguru softly snoring on Satoru’s chest, not an inch of space in between them, the grabby hands seem like a blessing.
The pain from before bloomed back in her chest.
She knows it’s insane, impossible, and stupid to the nth degree. If the boys knew even a second of her thoughts, they’d shut it down quicker than it could ever have the chance to become recognizable. It’s obviously the hormones talking because she never has these thoughts anymore. But even knowing all of this, it doesn’t stop the very real pain from blooming in her chest.
Unloved. Unwanted. Unequal.
Homewrecker.
Being the one to join an already committed relationship is hard enough. But when that relationship is between the two strongest jujutsu sorcerers of their generation, partners in everything personally and professionally? Damn near impossible.
Not because of the boys, never because of them. If anything, they were the ones that hid and kept her safe from those biting words, protecting and upholding her honor as if it was their own. But it doesn’t negate the fact that people could not understand why the two people at the top, freely occupying a space that few have even come close to, would allow a measly not-even-first-grade to join their sanctuary.
Her gloomy thoughts were quickly cut off by another rumble in her stomach, loudly demanding her immediate attention.
She rubs her swollen stomach gently, “Sorry peanut, I’m getting on it. Thanks for reminding me” and getting me out of my head.
She turns away from the painfully beautiful sight, rolling over while gently holding her stomach with both arms. Finally getting her feet on the ground, she pushes herself up and off the bed with some difficulty and quietly exits the room. Waddling down the corridor as quickly as a 7-month pregnant woman can, she clicks the light switch up, the kitchen illuminating immediately. The light would’ve been too strong for her but Suguru always dimmed it right before bed, knowing she might want a late-night snack.
Usually, she could never figure out what she wanted to eat, never too picky or bothered by a food choice as long it wasn’t too sweet. The boys usually choose what restaurant they wanted to go to, with her just trusting Suguru to reign in Satoru from just buying desserts. But now, she always knew exactly what she wanted at all times.
Making her way over to the fridge, she pulls out a pickle jar. They probably don’t belong there but she likes her pickles quite cold. She sets it on the countertop then goes to the adjacent cupboard and pulls a peanut butter jar from there.
Finally, some kind of relief from at least her stomach.
Or she thought.
Holding the pickle jar down firmly, she goes to twist off the top. Doesn’t work. She tries again, using all her strength in both arms. Doesn’t work. She tries it over and over and over again. Honestly, the jar doesn’t even look any different.
She feels the tears starting to fill her eyes again but she wouldn’t let that stop her. She was going to feed herself. She was going to feed her child. She wasn’t going to be this useless bitch. She is worthy of having children, their children, worthy of being in this relationship, worthy of that fucking title of first grade. The tears start pouring down at this point, she deserves it she knows-
“Hime babe?”
Whipping around at the husky voice, she makes direct eye contact with Suguru, rubbing his eyes and standing at the kitchen entrance. Her Sugu. Or is he hers? Is she allowed to call him hers? Even though she’s carrying his child doesn’t mean she has that permission.
They call her theirs but maybe that’s where it ends. They can claim anything they want, what makes her different? But she’s weak, the scar on her face is a reminder. Her inability to even feed herself and her child is a reminder. She can’t claim them.
She isn’t strong enough to.
A sob escapes her and her body starts shaking.
Suguru’s eyes widen as he quickly circles around the table to make his way over to his girl, “Baby baby, please don’t cry I’m right here my love I’m right here”
He couldn’t reach her fast enough but when he did, they both latched onto each other like a lifeline. She couldn’t take it anymore, burying her head into his neck, and just started sobbing. Suguru holds her up, he always does. Gently picking her up, he lifts her in his arms and carries her, secretly enjoying the feeling of her enlarged stomach pressing up against him.
Bouncing on his heels, he gently rocks the crying girl in his arms as he tries to soothe her in any way possible. The constant stream of sweet nothings never stops leaving his mouth but in his case, it’s not “nothings”. He means every word.
“It’s okay baby, it’s alright. I’ll fix it just tell me what’s bothering you”
Sniffing, Utahime comes out from hiding and just starts blubbering “The pickle jar, I tried so hard and it won’t- ugh it won’t open!”
She couldn’t go on as she feels the sob still lodged into her throat but he understood.
“I’m so hungry”
A sharp ache starts in Suguru’s chest, the desperation and sadness in Utahimes voice were not things he ever wanted to hear or allow. Of course, he loved her pregnant, he always has. But this time around her emotions took the driver’s seat, and not the good ones either.
Nuzzling her face with his own, he makes his way over to the counter he found her in front of, “I know babe I’m here I’ll get it for you”.
Setting her down beside the pickle jar, he only takes one arm away from her. “Can you hold the jar baby? I’ll twist it open” he asks.
Doing as she was asked, she holds the base of the jar with both hands and Suguru twists the top. The satisfying pop resounded in the empty kitchen and Utahimes chest felt a lot lighter.
Picking Utahime up with one arm, Suguru crosses the kitchen to get the plate, with a spoon, before coming back and putting two pickles on it. With the spoon, he scoops up a generous portion of crunchy peanut butter in it and sets it next to the pickles. All while, Utahime is just resting her head on his broad shoulder, watching and feeling as his muscles move around.
Plate in one hand, pregnant lover in the other, Suguru makes his way over to the dining table. He sets the plate down with ease but when he goes to set her down, she just clings to him desperately.
“Where are you going?”, the panic clear in her voice, “Why are you leaving?”
The sharp ache came back even stronger.
“I’m sorry baby I’m staying, I’m not going anywhere. And I’m never going to leave you, ever”
Sitting down and setting her on his lap, he grabbed on to her as tight as he could without putting too much pressure on her bump. He only went to set her down because he thought she might want space when she eats. Because if it was up to him, she would always be in his arms.
Utahime goes to grab the first pickle, smearing some of the peanut butter on it before taking a big bite. She lets out a satisfied moan as she chews, closing her eyes. This hits the spot, soothing her even further. Not to mention the warmth and strength of Suguru grounding her, making her feel the love she was doubting minutes ago.
She’s silent as she continues to eat, stopping every now and then to nuzzle Suguru’s face and place kisses wherever she could. Suguru only chuckles in return, kissing her back and holding on to her even tighter.
Soon, another voice pipes up-
“Midnight snack without me?”
-and now, their trio is complete.
Satoru’s voice contains his signature teasing tone, even when it’s husky with sleep. Although the tone leaves him altogether when he sees the tear streaks and red eyes on Utahime’s face. He reaches her side in no time, crouching down to hold her face in his hands.
“What’s wrong my love, why are you crying?”
The question alone makes her teary-eyed all over again. What the fuck are these hormones doing to her?!
Satoru’s panic grows as he sees her actively crying, not used to his strong girl crying pregnant or not.
“No no, I’m sorry please don’t cry”
Suguru chimes in, “We just want to know what’s wrong my love nothing else”
Utahime knew she’d feel better if she told them. They’re the only ones that can truly put her mind to rest on this topic. Even if she is fully aware of how much they adore and love her, some reassurance is always nice.
Looking down at her swollen belly, she takes comfort in her child before placing her head down on the father.
“Bad thoughts”
That’s all she needed to say to have both men understand and fully be engulfed in rage. This happened a lot when they first started dating, people’s words were rough and unforgiving towards her. Ironically they had nothing to say to the two men in a committed relationship, nothing to say about the fact that they were the ones pining for her first long before they got together, nothing to say when both men agreed to court her and bring her into the relationship. People had not a damn peep to make about the fact that they were the ones to actively pursue her, not the other way around.
Utahime, if anything, forced the two men to bond. Planning dates for the two of them when the men first got together, making them face their issues head-on and express their love for each other beyond just fucking. This continued after she joined them as well, planning the dates and throuple activities. Not only did she love and spend time on the relationship she had with them, but she also had just as much love for the relationship between the two men. That’s why she was so hesitant to join. And the words people hurled at her didn’t help. It was only until Gojo and Getou threatened the higher-ups, made a big deal at the annual gathering, damn near blowing the place up, that people realized that she wasn’t just a plaything but an equally valuable, important and loved partner in their throuple.
Suguru’s forced her to look at him, tilting her chin gently but firmly. “Did anyone say anything to you?” he asked gently but there’s no mistaking the fire in his voice.
She shook her head and let out a soft “No”.
Satoru spoke up, “You have to let us know princess, we’ll sort it out”
“No I’m serious, no one said anything. It was just… I’ve been having dreams of those times. Then I would wake up and I wanted to cuddle with you two but you seemed too comfy and I was hungry and didn’t want to wake you two up. I know it’s stupid but I woke up really wanting a hug and seeing you two cuddle and be so far away just reminded me of what people said before. I’m just being hormonal you don’t have to worry about it”, she quickly got out, not being able to make eye contact with either of them.
The men stayed silent as she stumbled on her words, letting her rant it out as they gently stroked her skin. The rage they felt didn’t dull but a pain joined it instead.
Suguru started kissing down the length of her neck, taking his time with each one. He slowly moves back up until his mouth is right next to her ear.
“You can cuddle with us whenever. Don’t worry about waking us up, for food, for cuddles, for any reason. And we always want to be included in what you want, just like we have and will always want you to be part of whatever we do.”
“Yeah Hime. What those people said is bullshit. The higher-ups are trash, you know that damn well. They don’t know a fucking thing about us or you for that matter.”
We love you. More than we will ever be able to show or say. Please trust us, we want you more than you know.
After all these years, the men still weren’t good with words. But luckily, after all these years, Utahime heard them nonetheless.
This is why her thoughts never got out of control during the day, only in the middle of the night. Because every morning, Satoru would always wiggle his way into her pregnancy pillow, waking her up with kisses all while Suguru brought her a snack in bed. Even if it was just an apple with pepperoni or shrimp chips and ice cream, he brought her food while she was lightly pushed back into the middle of the bed. They would kiss her, talk to her belly and just feel her warmth all while she ate, not wanting to start the day without it.
They always put her to ease without even knowing she was in distress.
Raising her hand up to Satoru’s hair, she starts playing with it. Simultaneously, she cups the back of Suguru’s neck to gently massage it and scratches the hair at the nape. Both men automatically melt, letting their lover’s hands cast a spell on them. Seeing how easily she was able to get these rambunctious men docile put her mind at rest. No matter what anyone says these were her men, her partners, her people. “Boyfriends” does not express their place in her life. Not even “husbands”, at least not the definition used in the jujutsu world. To sorcerors, marriage was about status and control, and none of them wanted to bother with the misogyny from the higher-ups and clans. Utahime’s had enough just being with them. They loved and respected each other and that is more than most sorcerer marriages could say but secretly all three wished to get married. Wished that the structure wasn’t the way it is.
After a while, light footsteps were heard by all three of them, bringing a soft smile to their faces before they even saw her.
“Papa? Mama? Dada? You up?”
The 2-year-old girl probably woke when she heard talking in the kitchen with her hearing being incredible thanks to her dad. Feeling all her parents in the kitchen confused her to no end. When she noticed her fathers crowding around her mom and baby bump, she instantly got concerned.
“Mama? You okay?”
Utahime could help the coo that left her lips, immediately lifting her arms up to welcome her daughter. “Mama’s fine baby girl, just got hungry”
Rushing into her favourite place, Aika slotted herself in between her parents and hugged her mom, trying to feel and sense her little brother. She looked up at her mother with her bright eyes. One eye is bright blue with amber specs, while her other eye was amber with blue specs. Both eyes are equally intense and commanding, the perfect mix of Utahime and Satoru. Even her hair was a constant reminder of her biology, purple dominating her head except the front section. The stark white front strand framed her heart-shaped face delicately. Aika was absolutely gorgeous, just like her parents.
Her personality however was entirely like her Dada.
Aika shifted her gaze to her Dada. “Dada hungry too?”
Suguru couldn’t help the fond smile on his face, palming the side of his daughter’s face, “No sweetheart just keeping your mom company”.
Turning around, she asks Satoru “Is Papa hungry?”
Satoru picked the little girl up, causing her to let out a squeal and he gently tossed her up in the air before cuddling her down onto his lap.
“I can eat. Does Ai-chan want to eat?”
This gets him two stern looks from his lovers but an excited nod from his daughter.
“Cake!”
“No baby girl, no cake. We can have some in the morning but not right now”
Aika tilts her head to the side, her wide eyes looking confused at her mother, “But Mama is eating?”
“Your baby brother is hungry. Even woke me up with how hungry he is” Utahime teased.
Expecting her little girl to giggle, she got confused when Aika frowned instead. It only grew when the little girl start glaring at the baby bump.
Satoru noticed as well, “Ai-chan what’s wrong?”
Without answering her father, she crawled up from Satoru’s lap directly in front of the bump. She placed her little hands on each side of it and pressed her nose to Utahime’s belly button.
“Baby-chan, stop bothering Mama. She needs to sleep. You made her cry. That’s mean”
Utahime’s chest felt like it couldn’t contain her heart anymore, her ribcage not built for this amount of love. One glance at her men told her they felt it too. She puts her hand on her daughter's back, pulling her in even closer. The dads then closed around their girls and soon-to-be child, creating a wall nobody could break through. This was their family, their people, and being the strongest sorcerers meant nothing if they didn’t have this.
“Thank you, baby girl. He’s doing his best but he can’t help his hunger either”
The little girl didn’t seem to understand, "I do it too? When I was in your belly?”
Satoru answered this time, “You did hun, all the time”
Aika’s face dropped. Utahime smacked Satoru on the chest, “Don’t worry sweetheart, all babies do that. It was kind of fun, like when I feed you now expect you were in my belly.”
“You don’t hate it? Then why you crying?”
Stroking her daughter’s face she tries to search for an answer.
“Mama has some bad dreams sometimes honey, that’s all. But it’s alright now, your Papa and Dada will protect me”
The men close in even more.
Aika rests her head down on Utahime’s knees, eyes drooping, “That’s good. Papa and Dada will always protect us”
She senses her fathers' energies shift, feeling their gentle strokes on her arms and back soon after.
Suguru’s deep voice relaxes her further, “Yes we will sweetheart. You go to sleep, we got you and your Mama”
They stayed in this quiet lull together, Aiko slipping back into dreamland with the gentle rubs from her parents, and occasional movement from her little brother.
Only after he was sure she was asleep Satoru picked up the sleeping doll, tucking her head into the crook of his neck.
“I’ll put her back to bed”
Suguru stood up at this, gently guiding Utahime off his lap, “Let me, you take care of our other girl”.
The two men switched places with a soft peck during the exchange. Satoru turned to face Utahime with a wide smile as he picked her up with ease, spinning her around in circles. She began to softly giggle, not wanting to wake her daughter up again but couldn’t help and express her joy. But that's fine, it was enough for Satoru.
He stopped and set her down on the island, eagerly looking at her. “Want some cake?”
Utahime blushed, clutching onto Satoru’s shoulders as she hid in his chest but nodded nonetheless. Her son was developing a sweet tooth it seems like, with the addiction passing through her. Satoru was delighted, to say the least, when Utahime first began asking for sweets 2 months into the conception of their son.
Satoru’s chest shook as he chuckled, pulling her out of her hiding spot and placing a deep kiss on her plump lips. It was meant to be short but neither of them cared when it went on for a couple more minutes. Finally pulling apart, they looked at each other for a bit with soft smiles on their faces.
Satoru breaks the trance first, pecking Utahime's nose before lifting her up again. With her still in his arms, he heads to the fridge, blabbing the whole way about how he can’t believe she prefers strawberry shortcake to chocolate fudge. Suguru comes back to his partners sharing a chair back at the dining table, the whole cake in front of them as they go in with their own forks.
Satoru faces him with a strawberry still poking out of his mouth, “Want some?”
“You’re worse than our daughter”
That night, Utahime fell asleep with a satisfied stomach, sandwiched between the two men (who promised to be extra careful with her bump) and the gentle energy of her daughter in the next room. Their son would occasionally flip-flop around in her, causing Satoru to reach over her body and pat her stomach, “Your mom’s been through it bud, calm down for a little bit”
Suguru nuzzles further into her full breasts “Seems like my son is going to be more like you Satoru”
“What’s that supposed to mean?!”