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"Come on, sweetie, repeat after me. Daddy. Daddy. Daa-dee."
Instead of his youngest daughter's first words, Darius receives a face-full of Amity's snack of scrambled griffin eggs. He holds back a grimace and reaches for a towel to wipe off the mess while Amity keeps playing with her food. She smooshes the gooey eggs all over the table, babbling and giggling.
"You're lucky you are so cute, darling."
Blowing a raspberry at her father, she abandons the eggs and starts gumming her well-loved Otabin plushie. The poor toy has seen better days with its numerous repaired stitching and faded fabric. Darius tried to swap it out for a brand-new one a while back. Big mistake. Amity threw the biggest tantrum to end all tantrums. There was no peace in Blight Manor until she got the original plushie back, safe and sound.
"Dear, it has been three days. Amity will talk when she's good and ready," Alador voices without looking up from his newspaper.
Darius glares at his husband from across the kitchen table. "She has been babbling more each day and the books say that it's almost time." He picks up another towel and cleans up Amity's ruined meal. "Besides, I want her first words to be perfect."
The inventor scoffs, "Sounds like you're still holding onto some resentment from the twins' first words."
"I am not! It was adorable that Emira's first word was 'Ed' and Edric's was 'Em'."
"I seem to remember you cried that day."
"Tears of joy, Al! Tears. Of. Joy."
"And then I get a raven-call from Lia later saying that my dramatic and angsty husband drank all of her expensive wine as you sobbed for hours about how the twins didn't accept you as their dad."
Darius pouts and crosses his arms. "I just want a simple 'Daddy', is that so hard?"
Alador peers over the top of the newspaper and deadpans, "I can call you 'Daddy' later since you're so keen on it."
The Abomination witch throws a towel at his foolish husband, blushing from his cheeks to his ears. "You're impossible! And don't say lewd things in front of Amity!"
The inventor dodges the cloth projectile. "She's ten-months-old, Dar, she doesn't understand anything yet."
"That still doesn't give you a reason to say them! And she's really smart for her age." Darius then grumbles under his breath, "unlike that Boscha girl...little hellion."
Alador shakes his head at his husband's grumbling over Sasha's daughter again; the toddler "maliciously" spills juice all over Darius' cape once and suddenly, she's his worst enemy.
"If I keep saying 'Daddy' all of the time, perhaps she'll pick up on it."
"It's how you're saying it, Alador, that's the problem!"
Amity blinks at her silly fathers and wants their attention back on her, so she does the one thing Darius has been trying to coax out of her for days.
The youngest Blight speaks her first word, loud and clear.
"GAY!"
Except, it's not word he wanted.
Both witches whip their heads in their daughter's direction, faces in shock and mouths agape.
"Did...did Amity just..." Darius starts but doesn't know how to finish.
The newspaper drops from Alador's lax grip. "No. Maybe we heard wrong?"
"Y-Yes, because there is no way our sweet witchling possibly said--"
"Gay!" Amity giggles, bouncing in her highchair. "Gay gay gay GAY!"
"--that. Oh Titan."
The toddler happily waves Otabin at Darius. "Gay!"
"Sweetie, no, please stop saying--where are you going, Al?"
Alador is almost out the door when Darius spots him. "I'm going to get Amity's baby book," he explains with mirth in his voice, "to record this joyous moment. And maybe call Lia too." He quickly takes his leave because, knowing his husband, it won't be long before he gives chase.
"DON'T YOU DARE, ALADOR!" Darius yells after the fleeing Alador before transforming into his Abomination-self in order to catch him.
Amity blinks again at her bolting fathers and tilts her head to the side.
"Gay?"